Dear LIB readers: Am I wasting my time with this man?
From a female LIB reader
Please I need your opinion on something that is keeping me up at night. I met my boyfriend in November 2010 and after only four months of dating he proposed to me on Valentine's Day in 2011. I was really excited and believed he didn't want to waste time and was eager to marry me. But it's going to three years now since we got engaged and he hasn't said anything about a wedding. Every time I mention it he tells me I'm acting desperate that I should calm down that if he didn't want to marry me he would not have given me a ring. We are both over 30 so I don't understand the delay. What bothers me most is that he's not even talking about it. I suggested we get married the last week of December 2013 so we can begin a new life in 2014 but he said he will let me know when he's ready. Should I give him an ultimatum or just be patient?
Three yrs engagement !!!u neva mentioned dat u were one of d casts in LORD OF D RINGS lol common gurl u are 30 nd u are still waiting, he can get married at d age of 50 cos he is a man buh we gurls can't wait till den. So Mrs Actress d movie is out of d cinema buh nw in d market so happy sales*winks* Happi new year dear*cheers*
Baby considering U̶̲̥̅̊я age ℓ̊ think U̶̲̥̅̊ shud sit him down nd tell him U̶̲̥̅̊ dnt av tym on U̶̲̥̅̊я syd mtcheeew Ơ̴̴̮͡ơ̴͡ ℓ̊ think an ultimatum would ßε̲̣̣̣̥ ⌣̊┈̥-̶̯͡»̶̥Ơ̴̴̴͡K⌣̊┈̥-̶̯͡»̶̥ U̶̲̥̅̊ aint no kid no more when do U̶̲̥̅̊ want to start raising kids nd U̶̲̥̅̊я over 30 tell him his wasting U̶̲̥̅̊я tym really anyway ℓ̊ wish yhu luck nd ℓ̊ pray God wud guide U̶̲̥̅̊я steps in dis luck dear
U wan be 'lord of the rings' in the new year abi? U beta call off d relationship/engagement by doing any of the following: i) stop wearing the ring...u can just keep it, ii) return it or just throw d ring back at him or beta still iii) if it's gold, sell it and keep d proceeds...shikena!!! U need to start a new life in the new year. So many dulling guys out there, don't let him further waste ur time...he has already done enuf of dt! Wise up dear!
Babes, u wan be 'lord of the rings' in the new year abi? U beta call off d relationship/engagement by doing any of the following: i) stop wearing the ring...u can just keep it, ii) return it or just throw d ring back at him or beta still iii) if it's gold, sell it and keep d proceeds...shikena!!! U need to start a new life in the new year. So many dulling guys out there, don't let him further waste ur time...he has already done enuf of dt! Wise up dear!
I feel u should call it a quit...he is not serious about you and I feel he may be seeing some one else. Find someone good that would take you serious girl and not someone who is playing with you.
Mehn sister you can't continue to be this patient for long, you are not a dog. If someone else is eyeing you, give that person a chance since your man hasn't shown you a reasonable reason for not getting married to you by now.
You be serious olobe! Choi! So things like this still dae happen? No decent man would engage a woman without marrying her within 6 months tops! Berra leave the relationship for your own good, asap. Start fresh, 2014 is not for learners. Take heart and be strong. So sorry.
My sister flee, that is not an engagement, it is a jail sentence. If a guy wants to be with you, he will do all within his right to be with you. It's not like your Toke Makinwa that will wait 11 years to break up! Do it now if he is serious he will marry you, if he is not, then you know your answer. *in Frank Edoho's voice: 'walk away'
From experience, I can tell that you are just wasting your time with that man. If he truly loves you, he should v taken you to the altar long before now. As long as he gets the milk from the cow whenever he wants it, he wouldn't have any reason to buy the cow.
From experience, I can tell that you are just wasting your time with that man. If he truly loves you, he should v taken you to the altar long before now. As long as he gets the milk from the cow whenever he wants it, he wouldn't have any reason to buy the cow.
I thought I was the only one, I also have the Same issue I can not even Understand Him again, He Does not even went me close to Him any more,I Have made up my Mind to start a New Life This year Because I guess He is no longer interested.
Hmmm, u better becareful my neighour did it to 4 girls 4 inpregnanting an unknwin lady whom he got married to. So, u just becareful and watch him who knows he might be one of them.
Did u say u're over 30? My dear use yea head oo! No let one man cun tie u down in d name of engagement. Beta gve him an ultimatum nd move on if he doesn't bulge
.sister abeq wise up..am a guy and i know how we run our things..that guy is indirectly telling you that he is not ready for marriage...so the next step is in your hands..
The guy just use engagement to tie you, rum for your life before you become the next Toke Makinwa, besides menopause is knocking at your door. An engagement is not a binding factor.
My dear run 4 ur dear life pls,he can marry @ 60 sef,but u cnt!! N he dose not ♡ u anymore,it's just 2 clear he dos'nt want 2 marry u,u engaged 4 3yrs? Haba my sister clear ur eyes oooooo cos ♡ is not blind,e dey see wela!!!!!!!! Pls tro his ring 2 his face n run 4 ur life
Dear the only person that needs an ultimatum is you. DO not give a man an ultimatum, are you desperate. You look and see, if he is not working with your timeline. Carry your kaya. Plain and simple.
No!!! don't give him an ultimatum marriage is not by force just shove that engagement ring down his unserious ass and get moving. Think about this, maybe he doesn't even want to marry you. so my dear don't dull yourself, make yourself available for a more serious guy. Goodluck.
Hey babe, as much as I like the 1 peron at a time relationship, u better start working on. Plan B. Don't Sleep with Plan B sha, N start doing the I Don't Care Atitude with Dis guy. Let's Hope he comes around. Or u simply fall back to the New plan B Genie says Happy New Year
They say the patient dog eat the fastest bone, watin happen to the flesh way dey d bone? The dog way chop no get two head nah! My dear tell that nigga to put a ring on it or get the hell out of ur way!
ultimatum my dear the guy is yeye he took the leap of getting engaged but now he's trying to dodge marriage please don't waste your time give the ultimatum and if he doesn't agree there's plenty of fish in the ocean; they need to know it's not enough to just put a ring on it like putting a purchase on hold Love from Miami
He probably proposed to u to keep u on the leash.Are his family members aware that he has proposed?is everyone asking him when you two will get married?is he financially ok?so what is the delay for?reason out this objectively.A woman above 30 is at the shortend of the biological stick.Time is ticking away.Is he scared of commitment?are you two compatible?ask yourself all this.you know the answers in your heart.Three years is enough to know.God bless you as you take the step.
It has been said that d'patient dog has the fatest bone 2 himself if am correct.n'nwadaes men dnt want to get married if they ar nt financially balanced and all i say watch him closly i doubt he is cheatin on u i advice you 2 wait a bit more cos God doesnt give a problem witout a solution jst wait 4 a while bt watch him closly am detola pounds
I knw a lady who got engaged for ova 10yrs and d relationship still flopped and now shez heading to 50 without a man. So my dear age is not on ur side,d earlier u leave him,d better for u
My dear, why not take a cue from Toke Makinwa? Do you want to be 12 years a ring holder? He just trapped you with the ring! Know your worth and leave him, yeah, it will be painful but God will take care of you and give you your husband.I hope you're not still having sex with him? Stop wasting your time. Even if you give him the whole karma sutra he may still not marry you. Be strong and leave. Goodluck dear.
Is okay oooo madam! U be ring bearer? My dear u need make dem tell u say, he dey waste ur time b4 u realise it? Just like d Bible said ......"Flee all evil appearance" dis is one! Take a cue.
My dear, I may not be aware of the events before, during and after proposal but would love to advice you and some who may receive this advise earlier. 1- When you are in any relationship, irrespective of what the intention is, even at just friendship, watch out as it gets beyond handshake and starts creeping to the elbow, please inform you spiritual leader/pastor/mentor/senior friend. Whether or not you introduce your man to these respected people, make your man understand that your welbeing is a concern to these your leaders. Then watch for early signs of seriousness or slack for you to take a timely informed decision. 2- If eventually he proposes, on a unique date or a public place - sometimes this is done to prevent the lady from saying NO or I would think of it! My dear when such happens, say 'give me sometime to "pray" about it, and be serious indeed. This a test of his love/resolve, also a test of your love. 3-During this time, my dear discuss the proposal with your God, your Guide and your Guard, in other words heaven, your heart and your head be involved in your response. Take time out or do not let his calls/your friends etc distract you. It's a decision that can result to so many +ves or -ves, so be sure of your answer and be reasonably timely about it. 4-When in love I know the heart numbs the head, here is why your mentor/pastor/leader should know about your depth in any relationship and because they are outside your heart they can reasonably ask you some necessary questions and help you think outside the box. 5-If your man accuses you of over depending on your mentors/leaders/pastors etc, let them know that you are a lady of good reasoning that takes her decision as a matured person, however you like informing your leaders of certain decisions since it's supposed to be a long one-way journey.
Now for your situation, if you have some senior friend whom you have introduced your "fiancé" to, then arrange with that senior friend to call you guys for a dinner at his place, after all the wining and dining, while you are chatting away with the wife your senior friend somewhere in the kitchen/outside let your senior friend ask your man in private what his plans are and when. It should be done in private and given enough time to discuss his love for you and his dreams with you. His answers might flag questions/comfort.
It is better to dissolve an engagement in a matured manner because .... Let me not go there.
The above advice is with the assumptions that he is/you are/both of you are matured; "spiritually", psychologically/emotionally, financially, well organised and medically compatible.
If your or his pastor/leader were involved from onset, then some of these should have been checked, coached and settled/show will to improve before he is even allowed to propose/engaged.
I hope I have been of some help, else ignore my words and please note that I am of the strongest opinion of no sex or near sex before marriage - guys why steal something you would "own" after a few months, or ladies in general why give away something precious to some strangers who are just passersby in your precious life.
U didn't tell us weda he is financially stable or not, some men want to be financially stable b4 they get married u also didn't tell us if his family are in support of ur union or not if they not in support he mayb tryin to convince them to give dia blessing b4 he get married find out the reason 1st but 4 now b patient my dear
Hey madam, pleae give your boyfriend back his ring, end the relationship and kindly start afresh. If he truly loves you, he would come back for you. I know you're 30 and you feel you are getting old but please don't keep letting that man waste your time and life. I always tell girls, if a guy gives you a ring and isn't talking marriage in a few months time or in the next one year tops. Kindly give him back his ring. Why? Because not only is he wasting your time, he is also blocking other serious minded people that would actually have wanted to get serious with you! Please lady, let that guy go! It may be hard but this is a new year, if you don't do it now you'll never do it! Goodluck and even though I don't know you, I feel your pain and I wish you all the best.
He is not yet ready for marriage. All he did was to tie you down till the time he is ready. Just ask him wen he will b ready and if he doesn't ans or giv a response dat u like den an ultimatum has 2 come in.
pls watch him closely o.men are funny.over thirty isn't a joke in naija. when 18s are marrying nowadays.ask ur self.what is this guy doing for a livng?is it money that is holding him back from doing the wedding. do more investigations and lastly,if u guys are staying together. pls move out and get your own apartment becos most men do not respect women that live with them
I'll advise you exercise a little more patience. He might be sorting out some stuffs on u guys behalf e.g accomodation, vehicles and other logistics. Marriage no easy to put head like that ooo my sister. U can give him till mid of. 2014 and pls don't mention it again, it irritates men!
gyv him an ultimatum or u move on. its not easy but u just ve 2. lamar was engaged to his baby mama 4 10yrs nd he didn't end up marrying her. dont tnk him giving u wedding ring is an assurance.
Madam, I feel ur pain, speak to him on how u feel about d whole situation and if he's not forthcoming pls free d guy and pray to God ur own man is shown to u on time.
Just like some famous comedians would say and I quote 'you are not lord of the rings' if after three year he can't come to a consensus please give him an ultimatum.the more u wait, the more it takes him forever to make his decision#bestofluck#..
Which kain ring b dat? He just put a trademark on u so oda guys won't approach u... If he doesn't hv cash its undastood if odawise, pls remove d ring jor, abi ur hand na keyholder?
Which kain ring b dat? He just put a trademark on u so oda guys won't approach u... If he doesn't hv cash its undastood if odawise, pls remove d ring jor, abi ur hand na keyholder?
New year, new life. Just dump b4 he does. U don't nid a visioner to u d man's hrt n mind. U re nt getting younga. Ex-communicate ursef frm him n pray feverntly n God wil gve u ur own hubby. As of dat man, he's ful of deceit n mite b keeping a family outside ur vicinity without ur knowledge. Goodluck to u shaa.
New year, new life. Just dump him b4 he does. U don't nid a visioner to tel u d man's hrt n mind. U re nt getting younga. Ex-communicate ursef frm him n pray feverntly n God wil gve u ur own hubby. As of dat man, he's ful of deceit n mite b keeping a family outside ur vicinity without ur knowledge. Goodluck to u shaa.
Haba!ur fiance is not ready joor.3 yrs n he is nt saying anything abt marriage,that shows he is nt ready.I got engaged in march 2013,my trad wedding is comin up in june 2014.I feel we stayed for too long self.@least he shud even show he wnts to settle down.bt maybe he is jes tryin ur patience sha..
U are nt d lord of ring, i fink the best thing u shuld do is 2 give him his ring bak simple, so dat u can creat space 4 the serious 1cs. Linda if u lyk dnt post ma comment as usual.
Sweethat,pls move on.he's.... ..pegging you down.When it comes to marriage,men know what they want.3 yrs is more than enuf time to decide. For ur sake,pls move on.
Girl, its better you opt out of that relationship before it's too late. What is he waiting for? You are not getting any younger. I presume also that you have been having sex with him all this while. Do you think that he will still be willing to pay money for what he has been enjoying for free? He must have had his feel and will rather be looking for new grounds to conquer. My sister, pls leave that relationship so that single men will also know that you are available for marriage. Good luck!
Sweetheart, give him his ring back and move on. Which kind engagement be that? Three what? Abeg, give other guys wey dey find your face opportunity. Please, move on... Give him his ring back!
Sister, you've spent three year wearing a ring that will lead you no where near where you desire. Let me be rude here, you wear a ring that has given him unlimited and unwarranted access to your pants. A man that was decisive enough to give you ring within 4months and then decides to cover up "dating" time as an engaged man is not serious.
Chim ooooh... NNE please leave while you still have some sanity. One of my friends was engaged for 8 years and her story sounds just like yours... he is a great guy, didn't give her any reasons t o doubt him and whenever she brings it up he calms her down and so 2 yrs became 4 and then 6, then 8 years. The sick part is he is married now (not to my friend) my friend is desperately single and insane (cos she compares every guy she meets with this devil). He still calls her by the way to "check up on her".... That your fiance has that time wasting gene in him, leave now and start healing my dear...
please move on with your life dearie ,most guys out there are time waisters, i am talking from experience . he would come up with a story one day and even if he doesnt i dont think you are still making him go gaga ,if not he would have done something
Linda dis 1 u brot dis matter on blog ,hope we r safe??? Cos I have not seen dis type of topic in your blog. Is like tiwa savage have not send her picture 4 u 2 show us.
soon u will turn lord of the rings. Pls gv him ultimatum or move on with a better life. Y stay engaged for 3yrs nd he is sayn be patient. Abeg even patience don turn mama peace
Pls give him back his ring and move on....a man's time Ȋ̝̊̅§ never late but a woman's Ȋ̝̊̅§. I think d guy Ȋ̝̊̅§ out to waste Ʊя̲̅ precious time so give him back d ring and wait for 3mths if Ħ̀ε̅ doesn't show any seriousness u find happiness elsewhere.
am sure he has said he is nt ready for a baby too nd contraceptives or even abortion would av bin done. Pls move on my dear nd leave him in the past. Mtcheeeeeeeeewwwwwwwww men sha
never marry a man that is not ready for marriage, a man that is not ready for marriage will at the end blame all his setbacks on you, and you know what that means; a whole lot of trouble
Girl wisen up, dat guy just gave u dat piece of metal to tie u down. If he really wants to get married he would hav done so soon after d engagement. Over 2years of engagement!!!!who does dat??? Wen all other things are in place? My dear,he should either wed u or free u up for other men.
If he is already getting all the benefits of marriage from you: i.e., companionship, devotion & attention, love and most of all, un-hibited sex, then he may not commit for a VERY LONG TIME or EVER!
Simply put, you have a "NO PARKING" sign on your life and the broda does not want to park either! Get the sign off if he is financially secure and yet does not want to commit!
You're over 30 and he says you're acting desperate! !!Ain't nobody gonna tell you what to do at this point. You either move on and get a chance of meeting someone who is ready to settle down with you or continue to wait for him until he's ready like he says.
There's always this fear of a fresh start. ...but hey, The best is yet to come for you.
Patient u say? Ur name na patience? Abeg free d guy nd move on wit ur laif, if he definately wanna get married 2 u, he wld hav dne dat a lng tym ago, 3yrs is 2much na. So gehfrnd, plz move on wit ur laif, he is nat worth d stress...Gbam!!!
Don't ever let your value diminish,they always say you don't know what you have until you lose it but sometimes you knew what you have but never thought you would lose it! Let him go,if he's meant 4u...he will do what is right. #loveinsists
Kaiiiiii Lord of d RINGS tinz my dear woman to woman stop wearing the ring get a back up cos anything can happen don't put ur eggs in one basket be wise.
Msssswsh!Cnt understand y ladies alwz stuck their head even wen its all bruised up!What on earth re u still doin there?U need a seer to show u d hand writin on d wall?
Is ur bf still lukin for job?is he comfortable?wot do u know abt his family?is he his family breadwinner?dis ar d questions u shld av answers to by nw..if ur bf is comfortable,he has a job,his family doesn't depend on him,den I fink he his one unserious element..better still,y don't u talk it out wt him,u shld know him better..there ar tyms dat he listen well to u,"happy moments".watch out his mood my dear..Be prayerful too nd don't give up..God is in control
I have a question, did you say yes just because he asked? Or did you really want to marry this guy after only 4 months, if so, y? Was it for all the right reasons? Are you two financially stable? If yes, I feel u need to sit him down and discuss his reasons for postponing the marriage. An exact answer should do let you know what to do.
I dnt think the Guy is really insterested in you. I will advise you to go your separate ways because the Man that is meant for you will not drag his is feet.Secondly, if you are sexually involve he will not want to get married. Just think about it.
you need to sit him down and have a deep communication,it matters mostly in relationship.dnt hide anything from him,talk about what u're waiting for,how ur marriage will be,ask gud questions nd let him knw dt his answers matters most.hope he knw ur parents nd u knw his,dnt jst sit down till u see him marry another person.many tins are happen,dnt be a victim
My frend dump that ring.hes nt even going to marry u.tell him som1 else wants to marry u nd c wot he's reaction would look like.engagement ring means nothing my dear.hes only blockin ur way.m preety sure u r not d only he engaged.u beta fling dt ring b4 it is 2 late
Well, u don't need to force him into it. My opinion is u stop putting on that ring and declare urself single. If ur ready and he is not, plz don't force him.
Quit being foolish and quit the relationship with your head held high. He most likely proposed just to get you beneath the sheets. If he was really serious, he would have done the "needful'. 3years is too long to wait after engagement.
My dear how can u be engaged for 3years??????? Are u lord of the rings, u better quit dat relationship cus dat ring is stopping ur right man from seeing u
End that relationship right away o. U're nt gettin any younger. Plus he doesnt av anytin to lose evn if he marries at 50, he can still av kids bt u cant. Tym is tickin.
madam abeg this guy isnt ready for marriage he has only given you the ring so u wont walk away/to have you only to himself,then has your parent called him to ask him when he plans to settle down with you,lets your parents do that,from his response you know if to move on or chill for a while,but pls be ready to dump his silly ass
Stop acting as a wife and give him ab ultimatum But stop acting as a wife. You are probably too relaxed and he is taking you for granted. Start working on plan b
Dearie, I suggest u give him an ultimatum and while u r at it, u might consider giving him his ring back or at least stop wearing it. Tell him I'd start wearing it again wen he gives u a date. He cannot stand at d door of ur life for nothing. Its either he enters or he takes his ass out.
Linda,so you are now a Liber? Anyway,warn him that you are not getting younger and that ur reproductive system is getting old as well. The ball is in ur court if u want to have healthy babies.. No delay. -Yemoh.
u dont have to be patient in some situation. to me o, i will say 3 years patient is enough.make a decision and take ur stand, if he loves you, he wont let you go.
I think you two need to sit down and talk about this. Avoid deceit and delusion. He has to state a strong reason for the delay. Giving an engagement ring is not enough. If the explanation is not reasonable, set him an ultimatum. In the meantime, keep yourself. Abstain from sex with him. Men, though I am a man, can be funny. The ring may be a mark of acquisition. The frank truth is you have to prepare for anything but be strong. All the best!
seriously, if u don't take action he might take you for granted at d end of d day, why would he engage u for 3 good years and not marry u, you should start acting differently with him, behave as though if he doesn't want you, you will get somebody else, remove d ring, stop using it, probably he is sure he has u now cos u re engaged to him, if he is scared he might lose u, he might start taking actions
Sweetheart, he just wanted to lock u up to prevent u from getting other suitors but he isnt ready for marriage! Example of d types of 'winchi' I'm always talking about. U had better sit him down and give him an ultimatum or at least make him sit and talk seriously about a definite date even if not now..dont let him keep posting u oh! If not, cut ur losses and bounce! Sey u see toke ba?
Make yourself scarce. If he wants you, he'll come looking for you and get the knot tied. If he doesn't, you would have confirmed he doesn't want to marry you and then you move on. Personally, 3 years of stagnant engagement stinks fishy!
Hmmm.. engaged for 3 years. Dear, in my opinion I think it will be better you know your stand before its too late, the man engage u early cos he doesn't want to share you with anyone whereas he's not ready to settle down (selfish interest) . You've been patient with him for years and it didn't work out well for you, I would advice you give him the ultimatum but in a polite manner so he doesn't call you Rude.
Please leave this guy alone. I think if he wanted to marry you he would have done so at least a year ago. Give him an ultimatum or just walk out of the relationship. The earlier the better.
Any guy who keeps u engaged for 3yrs is not serious he is just bidding his time to ease out of the relationship and my dear,Dont U think U deserve better?so fling the ring at him and walk out holding ur head high!If he really wants u,He'll come begging if not then,on to the next one!
Lmao! He don turn u to Lord of d rings niyen ooo. Ur finger na key holder ni? Babes be sharp mehn I dnt thnk he's serious. Sit him dwn n talk real sense into his head dnt allow him waste ur tym. There shld be a particular tym u can talk to him and he'd listen except if he's always on crack.
Hmmmmm ,in this situation patience Is no virtue ,that ring is just a chain of slavery .first thing u should do is keep that ring ,don't wear it again .when he is ready to marry you can wear it .then open your options oh .any guy. Comes don't say u are engaged oh .tell ur boyfriend that u want a plan and if he can't give u a concrete wedding plan u are out .if not he will keep u till he finds another girl ,dump you And marry her.be wise
Wow! This is serious!dear poster just try once more to find out his intensions and if its still the same,then give him back his ring and move on wit your life!I know someone wit similar experience.Hers is going to 5years now and everytime she asks d guy,he will say its his mum that's d problem!I tire oooo!
Obviously, he fell for something he thought was love...on realising it wasnt Love like he thought it was too late because he 'd already proposed and now he doesnt know how to tell you he 's not feeling you anymore....my dear , sad truth is you're wasting your time with this guy...take a walk , its a new year so try and start on a clean page.This guy wont marry you even if you give him eternity, dont waste your time holding on to a failed relationship and hoping for a miracle...unless you wan turn your fingers to keyholder LoL
My dear tell dat guy 2 pull over. Most men propose In oda 2 tie u down. He neva marry u and he no go let anuda man toast u. Dis is jan,2014 ask him wats up if hez still saying d same trash pls jump and pass no time 4 dulling. After somtym he will c some1 fresher dan u and leave ur sorry ass. *XTIC*
Engagement is when a man proposes to marry a woman in a few months not when he puts a ring on her finger and scares other men away for the next 3years..that is Witchcraft...My dear don't dull unless u want dat ring to turn to a keyholder
My dear noting scares a guy more dan d tot of getting married...its like "prison" to us. Just remain patient, its better to be sure of who ure getting married to dan to split after a few years of d wedding! Trust me...everytins always happen at d rite time...if u av faith
My dear,i suggest u leave him,hes a time waster,using the ring 2 hold u dwn,or tlk 2 him and tell him u cnt do it anymre and want 2 walk away,mayb he'll sit up,either way dnt put ur hopes on him
My dear,i suggest u leave him,hes a time waster,using the ring 2 hold u dwn,or tlk 2 him and tell him u cnt do it anymre and want 2 walk away,mayb he'll sit up,either way dnt put ur hopes on him
Very tricky. You understand your man better, you have to find a platform where you can get him to talk and you also have to find a way to make him know that you are not happy about the situation. Some men are like that, so afraid to commit but that doesn't necessary mean they don't love you. Give him a sign like not giving him so much attention like you use to, take trip, stop caring like you would care for a husband. And most importantly DON'T GET PREGNANT as s means to trap him. Do not also walk away angrily. Who knows it might just be the point he is about to commit you now walk away. See if he will come around. I hope I have been able to help.
Engagement is when a man proposes to marry a woman in a few months not when he puts a ring on her finger and scares away other men in the next 3years. That is witchcraft
I think u should give him an ultimatum,he shouldn't waist ur time,if it didn't tk him long time to place an engament ring on ur hand why shld it tk him years to plan or talk abt d wedding,come to think of it u didn't force him to engage u in d first plc.to me it look like as if he is a hindrance to ur progress.
I tink he gave you that ring due to impulse, bcos it was just four months to ur Rlasunship and he was so inlove, but now the eagerness has died down a lil, My advice is give him back his ring but still continue with the relationship, then try new things like go out on dates, bcos maybe in his mind he might be regretting he engaged you too soon and doesn't no how to call it off, We wise don't be the lord of the Rings!!!
I tink he gave you that ring due to impulse, bcos it was just four months to ur Rlasunship and he was so inlove, but now the eagerness has died down a lil, My advice is give him back his ring but still continue with the relationship, then try new things like go out on dates, bcos maybe in his mind he might be regretting he engaged you too soon and doesn't no how to call it off, We wise don't be the lord of the Rings!!!
Please run as fast as you can, he doesn't want you as a wife, if you force him you will def be a frustrated wife. Men always know what they want from the start, ma dear throw that ring away and start your search for ur own Mr, before December you can be a real mrs. Don't be a learner ooooo
Discuss financial matters with him and show support if he comes short in this direction. Moreover,starve him of sexual bliss to test his resolve. This will drive home d massage clearly. If he is urs he will fast track the wedding process. My wife did the same to me and it works. We are now married for 3yrs now. Wish u gudluck!!
704 comments:
«Oldest ‹Older 401 – 600 of 704 Newer› Newest»Three yrs engagement !!!u neva mentioned dat u were one of d casts in LORD OF D RINGS lol common gurl u are 30 nd u are still waiting, he can get married at d age of 50 cos he is a man buh we gurls can't wait till den. So Mrs Actress d movie is out of d cinema buh nw in d market so happy sales*winks* Happi new year dear*cheers*
Baby considering U̶̲̥̅̊я age ℓ̊ think U̶̲̥̅̊ shud sit him down nd tell him U̶̲̥̅̊ dnt av tym on U̶̲̥̅̊я syd mtcheeew Ơ̴̴̮͡ơ̴͡ ℓ̊ think an ultimatum would ßε̲̣̣̣̥ ⌣̊┈̥-̶̯͡»̶̥Ơ̴̴̴͡K⌣̊┈̥-̶̯͡»̶̥ U̶̲̥̅̊ aint no kid no more when do U̶̲̥̅̊ want to start raising kids nd U̶̲̥̅̊я over 30 tell him his wasting U̶̲̥̅̊я tym really anyway ℓ̊ wish yhu luck nd ℓ̊ pray God wud guide U̶̲̥̅̊я steps in dis luck dear
Deep down, you know what to do. . . 3 years later and he isn't ready yet? Why did he ask in the first place. . .
Hunny ditch his add. ...He is a time waster. You deserve better!
U wan be 'lord of the rings' in the new year abi? U beta call off d relationship/engagement by doing any of the following: i) stop wearing the ring...u can just keep it, ii) return it or just throw d ring back at him or beta still iii) if it's gold, sell it and keep d proceeds...shikena!!!
U need to start a new life in the new year. So many dulling guys out there, don't let him further waste ur time...he has already done enuf of dt! Wise up dear!
Babes, u wan be 'lord of the rings' in the new year abi? U beta call off d relationship/engagement by doing any of the following: i) stop wearing the ring...u can just keep it, ii) return it or just throw d ring back at him or beta still iii) if it's gold, sell it and keep d proceeds...shikena!!!
U need to start a new life in the new year. So many dulling guys out there, don't let him further waste ur time...he has already done enuf of dt! Wise up dear!
I feel u should call it a quit...he is not serious about you and I feel he may be seeing some one else. Find someone good that would take you serious girl and not someone who is playing with you.
My dear run for ur life before u turn to Lord of the Rings. Ur baggar wana ruin u,dump his sorry ass.
Mehn sister you can't continue to be this patient for long, you are not a dog. If someone else is eyeing you, give that person a chance since your man hasn't shown you a reasonable reason for not getting married to you by now.
No wahala,just keep on waiting till ur death ok?no man or woman wait to keep on biside GOd on going on with life giviven,,bewarn
some bad characters brin g out some delay in marriage,check ur self
You be serious olobe! Choi! So things like this still dae happen? No decent man would engage a woman without marrying her within 6 months tops! Berra leave the relationship for your own good, asap. Start fresh, 2014 is not for learners. Take heart and be strong. So sorry.
My sister flee, that is not an engagement, it is a jail sentence. If a guy wants to be with you, he will do all within his right to be with you. It's not like your Toke Makinwa that will wait 11 years to break up! Do it now if he is serious he will marry you, if he is not, then you know your answer. *in Frank Edoho's voice: 'walk away'
My dear, please, move on.
From experience, I can tell that you are just wasting your time with that man. If he truly loves you, he should v taken you to the altar long before now. As long as he gets the milk from the cow whenever he wants it, he wouldn't have any reason to buy the cow.
From experience, I can tell that you are just wasting your time with that man. If he truly loves you, he should v taken you to the altar long before now. As long as he gets the milk from the cow whenever he wants it, he wouldn't have any reason to buy the cow.
1st oo...Yaaga
just b patient dear God's time is d best.first to comment
I thought I was the only one, I also have the Same issue I can not even Understand Him again, He Does not even went me close to Him any more,I Have made up my Mind to start a New Life This year Because I guess He is no longer interested.
dont give him an ultimatum, just give room to other suitors to meet you den wen you get a serious one, you can actually call it a quit.
Hmmm, u better becareful my neighour did it to 4 girls 4 inpregnanting an unknwin lady whom he got married to. So, u just becareful and watch him who knows he might be one of them.
Did u say u're over 30? My dear use yea head oo! No let one man cun tie u down in d name of engagement. Beta gve him an ultimatum nd move on if he doesn't bulge
.sister abeq wise up..am a guy and i know how we run our things..that guy is indirectly telling you that he is not ready for marriage...so the next step is in your hands..
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The guy just use engagement to tie you, rum for your life before you become the next Toke Makinwa, besides menopause is knocking at your door. An engagement is not a binding factor.
My dear run 4 ur dear life pls,he can marry @ 60 sef,but u cnt!! N he dose not ♡ u anymore,it's just 2 clear he dos'nt want 2 marry u,u engaged 4 3yrs? Haba my sister clear ur eyes oooooo cos ♡ is not blind,e dey see wela!!!!!!!! Pls tro his ring 2 his face n run 4 ur life
Dear the only person that needs an ultimatum is you. DO not give a man an ultimatum, are you desperate. You look and see, if he is not working with your timeline. Carry your kaya. Plain and simple.
No!!! don't give him an ultimatum marriage is not by force just shove that engagement ring down his unserious ass and get moving.
Think about this, maybe he doesn't even want to marry you. so my dear don't dull yourself, make yourself available for a more serious guy. Goodluck.
Hey babe, as much as I like the 1 peron at a time relationship, u better start working on. Plan B. Don't Sleep with Plan B sha, N start doing the I Don't Care Atitude with Dis guy. Let's Hope he comes around. Or u simply fall back to the New plan B
Genie says Happy New Year
They say the patient dog eat the fastest bone, watin happen to the flesh way dey d bone? The dog way chop no get two head nah! My dear tell that nigga to put a ring on it or get the hell out of ur way!
Pls my dear return bck d ring to him and move on
ultimatum my dear the guy is yeye he took the leap of getting engaged but now he's trying to dodge marriage please don't waste your time give the ultimatum and if he doesn't agree there's plenty of fish in the ocean; they need to know it's not enough to just put a ring on it like putting a purchase on hold
Love from Miami
3yrz engagement?Abeg waka comot!since he z nt giving any reason..he z definitely nt readi...
He probably proposed to u to keep u on the leash.Are his family members aware that he has proposed?is everyone asking him when you two will get married?is he financially ok?so what is the delay for?reason out this objectively.A woman above 30 is at the shortend of the biological stick.Time is ticking away.Is he scared of commitment?are you two compatible?ask yourself all this.you know the answers in your heart.Three years is enough to know.God bless you as you take the step.
It has been said that d'patient dog has the fatest bone 2 himself if am correct.n'nwadaes men dnt want to get married if they ar nt financially balanced and all i say watch him closly i doubt he is cheatin on u i advice you 2 wait a bit more cos God doesnt give a problem witout a solution jst wait 4 a while bt watch him closly am detola pounds
I knw a lady who got engaged for ova 10yrs and d relationship still flopped and now shez heading to 50 without a man. So my dear age is not on ur side,d earlier u leave him,d better for u
Yes oh! Pls do move on my dear if he doesn't wanna say anytn concrete. No tym oh!- lolo
PLEASE LET HIM KNOW SOME WOMEN DE ENTER MENOPAUSE AT AGE FORTY FIVE!!,,ILE OBIRIN KI PE SU, LET SOMEBODY TRANSLATE IN WAZOBIA
My dear, why not take a cue from Toke Makinwa? Do you want to be 12 years a ring holder? He just trapped you with the ring! Know your worth and leave him, yeah, it will be painful but God will take care of you and give you your husband.I hope you're not still having sex with him? Stop wasting your time. Even if you give him the whole karma sutra he may still not marry you. Be strong and leave. Goodluck dear.
Is okay oooo madam! U be ring bearer? My dear u need make dem tell u say, he dey waste ur time b4 u realise it? Just like d Bible said ......"Flee all evil appearance" dis is one! Take a cue.
Honey, that man aint ready to take to the altar!
Give him an ultimatum or just walk away!
Abeg Waka far. D guy no serious, he only wants to hook u down
My dear, I may not be aware of the events before, during and after proposal but would love to advice you and some who may receive this advise earlier.
1- When you are in any relationship, irrespective of what the intention is, even at just friendship, watch out as it gets beyond handshake and starts creeping to the elbow, please inform you spiritual leader/pastor/mentor/senior friend. Whether or not you introduce your man to these respected people, make your man understand that your welbeing is a concern to these your leaders. Then watch for early signs of seriousness or slack for you to take a timely informed decision.
2- If eventually he proposes, on a unique date or a public place - sometimes this is done to prevent the lady from saying NO or I would think of it!
My dear when such happens, say 'give me sometime to "pray" about it, and be serious indeed. This a test of his love/resolve, also a test of your love.
3-During this time, my dear discuss the proposal with your God, your Guide and your Guard, in other words heaven, your heart and your head be involved in your response. Take time out or do not let his calls/your friends etc distract you. It's a decision that can result to so many +ves or -ves, so be sure of your answer and be reasonably timely about it.
4-When in love I know the heart numbs the head, here is why your mentor/pastor/leader should know about your depth in any relationship and because they are outside your heart they can reasonably ask you some necessary questions and help you think outside the box.
5-If your man accuses you of over depending on your mentors/leaders/pastors etc, let them know that you are a lady of good reasoning that takes her decision as a matured person, however you like informing your leaders of certain decisions since it's supposed to be a long one-way journey.
Now for your situation, if you have some senior friend whom you have introduced your "fiancé" to, then arrange with that senior friend to call you guys for a dinner at his place, after all the wining and dining, while you are chatting away with the wife your senior friend somewhere in the kitchen/outside let your senior friend ask your man in private what his plans are and when. It should be done in private and given enough time to discuss his love for you and his dreams with you. His answers might flag questions/comfort.
It is better to dissolve an engagement in a matured manner because .... Let me not go there.
The above advice is with the assumptions that he is/you are/both of you are matured; "spiritually", psychologically/emotionally, financially, well organised and medically compatible.
If your or his pastor/leader were involved from onset, then some of these should have been checked, coached and settled/show will to improve before he is even allowed to propose/engaged.
I hope I have been of some help, else ignore my words and please note that I am of the strongest opinion of no sex or near sex before marriage - guys why steal something you would "own" after a few months, or ladies in general why give away something precious to some strangers who are just passersby in your precious life.
Cheerios and Joyful New Year!
U didn't tell us weda he is financially stable or not, some men want to be financially stable b4 they get married u also didn't tell us if his family are in support of ur union or not if they not in support he mayb tryin to convince them to give dia blessing b4 he get married find out the reason 1st but 4 now b patient my dear
Does your BF have a secured Job?
Linda u've never posted my comment for. Haba! Wat have I done naa? Happy new year
Be patient ok...mayb he is a good luck..but iwl ebele u if he dump u for nigeria...smh
Hey madam, pleae give your boyfriend back his ring, end the relationship and kindly start afresh. If he truly loves you, he would come back for you. I know you're 30 and you feel you are getting old but please don't keep letting that man waste your time and life.
I always tell girls, if a guy gives you a ring and isn't talking marriage in a few months time or in the next one year tops. Kindly give him back his ring. Why? Because not only is he wasting your time, he is also blocking other serious minded people that would actually have wanted to get serious with you!
Please lady, let that guy go! It may be hard but this is a new year, if you don't do it now you'll never do it!
Goodluck and even though I don't know you, I feel your pain and I wish you all the best.
He is not yet ready for marriage. All he did was to tie you down till the time he is ready. Just ask him wen he will b ready and if he doesn't ans or giv a response dat u like den an ultimatum has 2 come in.
U dnt wanna turn to methuselah rite?find ur level since he dosent talk about it. Peenewsplash.blogspot.com
My sister don't put all ur eggs in one basket,n let d man know dat there r oda available baskets..if U̶̲̥̅̊ r ova 30 do sth asap.threaten him my dear
If i were you i will run as fast as my leg can carry me,.this man is not serious, he is using you
Babe,givee him his cheap Ring back,3 yrs wearIng his ring. R u lord of d rings
pls watch him closely o.men are funny.over thirty isn't a joke in naija. when 18s are marrying nowadays.ask ur self.what is this guy doing for a livng?is it money that is holding him back from doing the wedding. do more investigations and lastly,if u guys are staying together. pls move out and get your own apartment becos most men do not respect women that live with them
I'll advise you exercise a little more patience. He might be sorting out some stuffs on u guys behalf e.g accomodation, vehicles and other logistics.
Marriage no easy to put head like that ooo my sister.
U can give him till mid of. 2014 and pls don't mention it again, it irritates men!
gyv him an ultimatum or u move on. its not easy but u just ve 2.
lamar was engaged to his baby mama 4 10yrs nd he didn't end up marrying her.
dont tnk him giving u wedding ring is an assurance.
Follow ur heart my love , but again u guys are over 30. A man is never too old for marriage. Think am well
Madam, I feel ur pain, speak to him on how u feel about d whole situation and if he's not forthcoming pls free d guy and pray to God ur own man is shown to u on time.
Just like some famous comedians would say and I quote 'you are not lord of the rings' if after three year he can't come to a consensus please give him an ultimatum.the more u wait, the more it takes him forever to make his decision#bestofluck#..
Which kain ring b dat? He just put a trademark on u so oda guys won't approach u... If he doesn't hv cash its undastood if odawise, pls remove d ring jor, abi ur hand na keyholder?
Which kain ring b dat? He just put a trademark on u so oda guys won't approach u... If he doesn't hv cash its undastood if odawise, pls remove d ring jor, abi ur hand na keyholder?
New year, new life. Just dump b4 he does. U don't nid a visioner to u d man's hrt n mind. U re nt getting younga. Ex-communicate ursef frm him n pray feverntly n God wil gve u ur own hubby. As of dat man, he's ful of deceit n mite b keeping a family outside ur vicinity without ur knowledge. Goodluck to u shaa.
Still be patient with him through this 2014 only..
Swthrt,I'll advise u tk a walk 4 gud. Dnt let anyman frustrate u. Its obvious he doesn't wish u well. May God gv u d courage 2 move on!
New year, new life. Just dump him b4 he does. U don't nid a visioner to tel u d man's hrt n mind. U re nt getting younga. Ex-communicate ursef frm him n pray feverntly n God wil gve u ur own hubby. As of dat man, he's ful of deceit n mite b keeping a family outside ur vicinity without ur knowledge. Goodluck to u shaa.
Pls my sis jst leave him o, dnt wait 4 any man dat long at d end of d day he will tell u u r nt d kind of woman he wnts.men r wicked.
Haba!ur fiance is not ready joor.3 yrs n he is nt saying anything abt marriage,that shows he is nt ready.I got engaged in march 2013,my trad wedding is comin up in june 2014.I feel we stayed for too long self.@least he shud even show he wnts to settle down.bt maybe he is jes tryin ur patience sha..
Mi dear,4 mi o ..I think he's wasting ur time,,wonder hw som1 will propose to u and after 3yrs,no marriage..he's ur enemy!
Drp his ring home weneva u goinout,u myt meet mr ryt,avin it on will chase guys 4rm u,his nt in anyway ready bt want u 2 appear takin 2 guys
My dear u are standing on a long tin.put it in prayer and all shall be well(xsexie blingx)
U are nt d lord of ring, i fink the best thing u shuld do is 2 give him his ring bak simple, so dat u can creat space 4 the serious 1cs. Linda if u lyk dnt post ma comment as usual.
Lol same here too but dere is noting u can do jux be calm an pray for him, it may b financial hardship jux undertand him
Sweethat,pls move on.he's....
..pegging you down.When it comes to marriage,men know what they want.3 yrs is more than enuf time to decide. For ur sake,pls move on.
Girl, its better you opt out of that relationship before it's too late. What is he waiting for? You are not getting any younger. I presume also that you have been having sex with him all this while. Do you think that he will still be willing to pay money for what he has been enjoying for free? He must have had his feel and will rather be looking for new grounds to conquer. My sister, pls leave that relationship so that single men will also know that you are available for marriage. Good luck!
Sweetheart, give him his ring back and move on. Which kind engagement be that? Three what? Abeg, give other guys wey dey find your face opportunity. Please, move on... Give him his ring back!
Leave is sorry ass...he is just tying you down
Sister, you've spent three year wearing a ring that will lead you no where near where you desire. Let me be rude here, you wear a ring that has given him unlimited and unwarranted access to your pants. A man that was decisive enough to give you ring within 4months and then decides to cover up "dating" time as an engaged man is not serious.
I say this with love: you are wasting your time....time that you apparently dont have .
*my first ever comment on dis blog* linda post it ooo ...
Chim ooooh... NNE please leave while you still have some sanity. One of my friends was engaged for 8 years and her story sounds just like yours... he is a great guy, didn't give her any reasons t o doubt him and whenever she brings it up he calms her down and so 2 yrs became 4 and then 6, then 8 years. The sick part is he is married now (not to my friend) my friend is desperately single and insane (cos she compares every guy she meets with this devil). He still calls her by the way to "check up on her".... That your fiance has that time wasting gene in him, leave now and start healing my dear...
please move on with your life dearie ,most guys out there are time waisters, i am talking from experience . he would come up with a story one day and even if he doesnt i dont think you are still making him go gaga ,if not he would have done something
M'y dear wat are u waiting for ?give him an ultimatum Quick .....uve got nô tym ...hes a tym waster
Biko...ur finger is nt a key holder o...u ave waited enof give him ultimatum...n u can choose to b patient n become d queen of d rings
i will suggest U̶̲̥̅̊ get a backup man just in case he ends up not marrying U̶̲̥̅̊.
Linda dis 1 u brot dis matter on blog ,hope we r safe??? Cos I have not seen dis type of topic in your blog. Is like tiwa savage have not send her picture 4 u 2 show us.
soon u will turn lord of the rings. Pls gv him ultimatum or move on with a better life. Y stay engaged for 3yrs nd he is sayn be patient. Abeg even patience don turn mama peace
calm down young lady ......marriage is nt somefin u just jump into...
Pls give him back his ring and move on....a man's time Ȋ̝̊̅§ never late but a woman's Ȋ̝̊̅§. I think d guy Ȋ̝̊̅§ out to waste Ʊя̲̅ precious time so give him back d ring and wait for 3mths if Ħ̀ε̅ doesn't show any seriousness u find happiness elsewhere.
Since 2010??? And this is 2014; u guys shud talking ur 3rd child now n not still on engagement. Pls move on wt ur life n leave d guy man.
am sure he has said he is nt ready for a baby too nd contraceptives or even abortion would av bin done. Pls move on my dear nd leave him in the past. Mtcheeeeeeeeewwwwwwwww men sha
never marry a man that is not ready for marriage, a man that is not ready for marriage will at the end blame all his setbacks on you, and you know what that means; a whole lot of trouble
It depends on d level of commitment. U are his babe, is he on any project dat can't b combined wit marriage? Did he give reasonable excuses?
My dear I really feel for u. I wud advise u to present ur situation b4 God, he will direct ur path cos men can be so unpredictable.
Girl wisen up, dat guy just gave u dat piece of metal to tie u down. If he really wants to get married he would hav done so soon after d engagement. Over 2years of engagement!!!!who does dat??? Wen all other things are in place? My dear,he should either wed u or free u up for other men.
U ova 30 nd u wasting ur time with this dude....my dear look 4 sm1else
If he is already getting all the benefits of marriage from you: i.e., companionship, devotion & attention, love and most of all, un-hibited sex, then he may not commit for a VERY LONG TIME or EVER!
Simply put, you have a "NO PARKING" sign on your life and the broda does not want to park either! Get the sign off if he is financially secure and yet does not want to commit!
You aint getting younger sis!
You're over 30 and he says you're acting desperate! !!Ain't nobody gonna tell you what to do at this point. You either move on and get a chance of meeting someone who is ready to settle down with you or continue to wait for him until he's ready like he says.
There's always this fear of a fresh start. ...but hey, The best is yet to come for you.
The best thing to do is go out there n get urself a serious minded young man.
#skaler#
Patient u say? Ur name na patience? Abeg free d guy nd move on wit ur laif, if he definately wanna get married 2 u, he wld hav dne dat a lng tym ago, 3yrs is 2much na. So gehfrnd, plz move on wit ur laif, he is nat worth d stress...Gbam!!!
seek d face of d most high, he will direct u on what to do...becose he is d solution solver
Don't ever let your value diminish,they always say you don't know what you have until you lose it but sometimes you knew what you have but never thought you would lose it! Let him go,if he's meant 4u...he will do what is right. #loveinsists
Kaiiiiii Lord of d RINGS tinz my dear woman to woman stop wearing the ring get a back up cos anything can happen don't put ur eggs in one basket be wise.
Msssswsh!Cnt understand y ladies alwz stuck their head even wen its all bruised up!What on earth re u still doin there?U need a seer to show u d hand writin on d wall?
Let him go dear. Its all for the best. He's undeserving of you
Is ur bf still lukin for job?is he comfortable?wot do u know abt his family?is he his family breadwinner?dis ar d questions u shld av answers to by nw..if ur bf is comfortable,he has a job,his family doesn't depend on him,den I fink he his one unserious element..better still,y don't u talk it out wt him,u shld know him better..there ar tyms dat he listen well to u,"happy moments".watch out his mood my dear..Be prayerful too nd don't give up..God is in control
Pls if u hv another suitor u like, give it a chance. Time waits for no woman and it will be worse when he later ends up with another woman.
you wear ring for 3years? you be lord of the ring?
I have a question, did you say yes just because he asked? Or did you really want to marry this guy after only 4 months, if so, y? Was it for all the right reasons? Are you two financially stable? If yes, I feel u need to sit him down and discuss his reasons for postponing the marriage. An exact answer should do let you know what to do.
Hmmmn....some guys are cruel sha, you keep a lady engaged for two. Give him an ultimatum!
If he truly loves u he would av married u by now. At least he proposed so y take forever
If I were u ooooo I swear I will leave,his only using d ring to decieve u.
I dnt think the Guy is really insterested in you. I will advise you to go your separate ways because the Man that is meant for you will not drag his is feet.Secondly, if you are sexually involve he will not want to get married. Just think about it.
you need to sit him down and have a deep communication,it matters mostly in relationship.dnt hide anything from him,talk about what u're waiting for,how ur marriage will be,ask gud questions nd let him knw dt his answers matters most.hope he knw ur parents nd u knw his,dnt jst sit down till u see him marry another person.many tins are happen,dnt be a victim
Dump his ass or he will dump you soon time waster.
My love,pls prayerfully leave him oh!
He had initiative to prospose so y is it taking him forever to marry u unless he is having cold feet.
Ps stop wasting ur time!
If in the first three month of this year he didnt say anytin,,,babe return hus ring.shikena!!!
If he is down financially at the moment,give him time. If not pls move on dear.
You are just his standby for sexual satisfactions. He will dump you when he is ready to marry
My frend dump that ring.hes nt even going to marry u.tell him som1 else wants to marry u nd c wot he's reaction would look like.engagement ring means nothing my dear.hes only blockin ur way.m preety sure u r not d only he engaged.u beta fling dt ring b4 it is 2 late
Well, u don't need to force him into it. My opinion is u stop putting on that ring and declare urself single. If ur ready and he is not, plz don't force him.
I dnt fink dat man is serious wit u, jus try front.
Maybe he does nt want to marry u anymore bt dnt knw hw to tel u his mind so jst quit before its too late
Wot type of guy is he? Loving, caring, committed. Hv u met his family? Hw does he introduce u? If he is nt committed nd hide u den u r wasting ur tym.
Quit being foolish and quit the relationship with your head held high. He most likely proposed just to get you beneath the sheets. If he was really serious, he would have done the "needful'. 3years is too long to wait after engagement.
My dear how can u be engaged for 3years??????? Are u lord of the rings, u better quit dat relationship cus dat ring is stopping ur right man from seeing u
End that relationship right away o. U're nt gettin any younger. Plus he doesnt av anytin to lose evn if he marries at 50, he can still av kids bt u cant. Tym is tickin.
Lord of the Rings..hehe..better leave that dude cos he aint serious at all.#leumas
Lord of the Rings..hehe..better leave that dude cos he aint serious at all.#leumas
Are you Lord abi Lady of the rings... hmm. Give him his ring and move on... this is 2014.
My sister you have since entered one chance
madam abeg this guy isnt ready for marriage he has only given you the ring so u wont walk away/to have you only to himself,then has your parent called him to ask him when he plans to settle down with you,lets your parents do that,from his response you know if to move on or chill for a while,but pls be ready to dump his silly ass
Stop acting as a wife and give him ab ultimatum But stop acting as a wife. You are probably too relaxed and he is taking you for granted. Start working on plan b
Dearie, I suggest u give him an ultimatum and while u r at it, u might consider giving him his ring back or at least stop wearing it. Tell him I'd start wearing it again wen he gives u a date. He cannot stand at d door of ur life for nothing. Its either he enters or he takes his ass out.
He might have an ultimate target before he his able to fix a date, But I believe you should be carried along also.
#Pray
Get d hell out of d relationship. Your in prison
Linda,so you are now a Liber? Anyway,warn him that you are not getting younger and that ur reproductive system is getting old as well. The ball is in ur court if u want to have healthy babies.. No delay.
-Yemoh.
Hmmm...!!! Linda i guest it u, coz u are above 30's. Be patient.
For me I believe he is not ready.so I advice u take a walk no matter how hard it is for u to do so.wish u d best.
Is your name Patience or Endurance?!
delay is dangerous. of course u are wasting your time. though you may not tell what he has in mind
babe my little and kind advice is that you should find your way out of his life cos, that man has no future not to take having one for you.
Men don't fool around wen they're in love,dis ur guy will waste ur time remember Tools tried waje 4 ten years
u dont have to be patient in some situation. to me o, i will say 3 years patient is enough.make a decision and take ur stand, if he loves you, he wont let you go.
Dear Friend,
I think you two need to sit down and talk about this. Avoid deceit and delusion. He has to state a strong reason for the delay. Giving an engagement ring is not enough. If the explanation is not reasonable, set him an ultimatum. In the meantime, keep yourself. Abstain from sex with him. Men, though I am a man, can be funny. The ring may be a mark of acquisition. The frank truth is you have to prepare for anything but be strong. All the best!
seriously, if u don't take action he might take you for granted at d end of d day, why would he engage u for 3 good years and not marry u, you should start acting differently with him, behave as though if he doesn't want you, you will get somebody else, remove d ring, stop using it, probably he is sure he has u now cos u re engaged to him, if he is scared he might lose u, he might start taking actions
Sweetheart, he just wanted to lock u up to prevent u from getting other suitors but he isnt ready for marriage! Example of d types of 'winchi' I'm always talking about.
U had better sit him down and give him an ultimatum or at least make him sit and talk seriously about a definite date even if not now..dont let him keep posting u oh! If not, cut ur losses and bounce! Sey u see toke ba?
Make yourself scarce. If he wants you, he'll come looking for you and get the knot tied. If he doesn't, you would have confirmed he doesn't want to marry you and then you move on. Personally, 3 years of stagnant engagement stinks fishy!
Be patient.
Give him enough blow jobs.
Hmmm.. engaged for 3 years. Dear, in my opinion I think it will be better you know your stand before its too late, the man engage u early cos he doesn't want to share you with anyone whereas he's not ready to settle down (selfish interest) . You've been patient with him for years and it didn't work out well for you, I would advice you give him the ultimatum but in a polite manner so he doesn't call you Rude.
Please leave this guy alone. I think if he wanted to marry you he would have done so at least a year ago. Give him an ultimatum or just walk out of the relationship. The earlier the better.
Pls return his ring nd move on. Pls look for another man sweetie. God bless U.
Any guy who keeps u engaged for 3yrs is not serious he is just bidding his time to ease out of the relationship and my dear,Dont U think U deserve better?so fling the ring at him and walk out holding ur head high!If he really wants u,He'll come begging if not then,on to the next one!
Lmao! He don turn u to Lord of d rings niyen ooo. Ur finger na key holder ni? Babes be sharp mehn I dnt thnk he's serious. Sit him dwn n talk real sense into his head dnt allow him waste ur tym. There shld be a particular tym u can talk to him and he'd listen except if he's always on crack.
@Chux.com.........my dear run for your life for he will soon dump you.engaging a lady for over a year is witchcraft.
My dear give him an ultimatum else u wud remain fiancée n neva a Mrs
Hmmmm, dis is vry seriou...will advice u nt to put ur eggs in one basket, like u said, "U r above 30" as such, u hv no time
Hmmmmm ,in this situation patience Is no virtue ,that ring is just a chain of slavery .first thing u should do is keep that ring ,don't wear it again .when he is ready to marry you can wear it .then open your options oh .any guy. Comes don't say u are engaged oh .tell ur boyfriend that u want a plan and if he can't give u a concrete wedding plan u are out .if not he will keep u till he finds another girl ,dump you And marry her.be wise
Wow! This is serious!dear poster just try once more to find out his intensions and if its still the same,then give him back his ring and move on wit your life!I know someone wit similar experience.Hers is going to 5years now and everytime she asks d guy,he will say its his mum that's d problem!I tire oooo!
Mai dear men could b scared of commitment. Talk things over wiv him, if he still dosent want 2 talk about it, take a loooong walk
Obviously, he fell for something he thought was love...on realising it wasnt Love like he thought it was too late because he 'd already proposed and now he doesnt know how to tell you he 's not feeling you anymore....my dear , sad truth is you're wasting your time with this guy...take a walk , its a new year so try and start on a clean page.This guy wont marry you even if you give him eternity, dont waste your time holding on to a failed relationship and hoping for a miracle...unless you wan turn your fingers to keyholder LoL
PRETTY GIRL
The man is not ready for you. Don't wast your time with him. Please go and settle down with someone else
My dear tell dat guy 2 pull over. Most men propose In oda 2 tie u down. He neva marry u and he no go let anuda man toast u. Dis is jan,2014 ask him wats up if hez still saying d same trash pls jump and pass no time 4 dulling. After somtym he will c some1 fresher dan u and leave ur sorry ass. *XTIC*
Engagement is when a man proposes to marry a woman in a few months not when he puts a ring on her finger and scares other men away for the next 3years..that is Witchcraft...My dear don't dull unless u want dat ring to turn to a keyholder
My dear noting scares a guy more dan d tot of getting married...its like "prison" to us.
Just remain patient, its better to be sure of who ure getting married to dan to split after a few years of d wedding!
Trust me...everytins always happen at d rite time...if u av faith
Run for your dear life please, he has no plan for you
He has no plan for you pls run as fast as you can
Sorry but your boyfy is an evil spirit and what the igbos call 'ogbu oge'....time waster.pls run for your dear life.....
Break up with this ass of a man.why e go tie you down with ring abi your finger na key-holder? RaAabbbissshh
My dear,i suggest u leave him,hes a time waster,using the ring 2 hold u dwn,or tlk 2 him and tell him u cnt do it anymre and want 2 walk away,mayb he'll sit up,either way dnt put ur hopes on him
My dear,i suggest u leave him,hes a time waster,using the ring 2 hold u dwn,or tlk 2 him and tell him u cnt do it anymre and want 2 walk away,mayb he'll sit up,either way dnt put ur hopes on him
Very tricky. You understand your man better, you have to find a platform where you can get him to talk and you also have to find a way to make him know that you are not happy about the situation. Some men are like that, so afraid to commit but that doesn't necessary mean they don't love you. Give him a sign like not giving him so much attention like you use to, take trip, stop caring like you would care for a husband. And most importantly DON'T GET PREGNANT as s means to trap him. Do not also walk away angrily. Who knows it might just be the point he is about to commit you now walk away. See if he will come around. I hope I have been able to help.
Engagement is when a man proposes to marry a woman in a few months not when he puts a ring on her finger and scares away other men in the next 3years. That is witchcraft
I think u should give him an ultimatum,he shouldn't waist ur time,if it didn't tk him long time to place an engament ring on ur hand why shld it tk him years to plan or talk abt d wedding,come to think of it u didn't force him to engage u in d first plc.to me it look like as if he is a hindrance to ur progress.
Please give him an ultimatum! Its a new year men #aintnobodygottimeforthat.
U'r both over 30 n he's nt ready yet,I really wonder wen he'll b ready...I dont tink he's ready 4 a Serious committment...jus move on wit u lyf
M. Dear. Stop wastin ur tym n move on he is wastin ur tym ooooo
3years after being engaged is too much. Jst open up to him......... u nid to talk it out with him
Babe dat dude is nt serious,u need 2 run as fast as u can-NKEMJIKA
Hmmmmmm, dis is seroz. Mine did dsame tin, so afta I left, he came beggin and now we r happly married. If he is not ready then u beta walk away.
Hmmmmmm, dis is seroz. Mine did dsame tin, so afta I left, he came beggin and now we r happly married. If he is not ready then u beta walk away.
Linda post my comment o,dis is a new year o
Pls give him an ultimatum.guys are deceptive
Patient ni, abi ur hand na key holder... Abegi sharply trow d ring for e head....
u have waited long enough...just sit him down & tell him waltz on ur mind...aunty Linda post dis o.
sister u betta slam dt ultimatum so hard on his face it hurts 3 yrs?? are u madam of the rings ni
Ultimatums don't work huney.jst remove the ring whenever ur not with him.let oda guyz talk to u.because this is witch craft
Pretty tricky
Ultimatums don't work huney.jst remove the ring whenever ur not with him.let oda guyz talk to u.because this is witch craft
Pretty tricky
My dear,I don't think he is ready to get married to u.What is he waiting for after three yrs?Its better u move on wit ur life before u clock 40.
patience has notin to do with this girl mak a move pls time is tidy waiting for no man!
One word for you: shine ya eyes!
Get pregnant for him.trust me it will work
I tink he gave you that ring due to impulse, bcos it was just four months to ur Rlasunship and he was so inlove, but now the eagerness has died down a lil, My advice is give him back his ring but still continue with the relationship, then try new things like go out on dates, bcos maybe in his mind he might be regretting he engaged you too soon and doesn't no how to call it off, We wise don't be the lord of the Rings!!!
I tink he gave you that ring due to impulse, bcos it was just four months to ur Rlasunship and he was so inlove, but now the eagerness has died down a lil, My advice is give him back his ring but still continue with the relationship, then try new things like go out on dates, bcos maybe in his mind he might be regretting he engaged you too soon and doesn't no how to call it off, We wise don't be the lord of the Rings!!!
I support you and I think dis is d best comment so far.
I totally agree, this is Witchcraft not engagement. Move on.
The truth is that he is not ready......dont blame we guys sometimes it's bcos of financial reasons that make us to delay not that all men play around
U hv to find out wella o cos he might b a married man nd he usd d ring to tie u down jst to hv free sex wth u ....
Please run as fast as you can, he doesn't want you as a wife, if you force him you will def be a frustrated wife. Men always know what they want from the start, ma dear throw that ring away and start your search for ur own Mr, before December you can be a real mrs. Don't be a learner ooooo
Discuss financial matters with him and show support if he comes short in this direction. Moreover,starve him of sexual bliss to test his resolve. This will drive home d massage clearly. If he is urs he will fast track the wedding process. My wife did the same to me and it works. We are now married for 3yrs now. Wish u gudluck!!
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