Welcome to Linda Ikeji's Blog: 11/04/2007 - 11/11/2007





Saturday 10 November 2007

Stress + Akon, Tyra, Beyonce and Funny George Bush

Seriously, I don't know what's going on, young people are dying nowadays from heart attack. I used to think heart attack was for much older people, whose hearts get weaker with age and can't take much stress or shock.

In the last two weeks or there about, I've heard of the deaths of at least three young people from heart attack.

A 47 year old guy died two days ago around my office. He drove his car into his compound, came out of it, slumped and died.

Same thing happened to 44 year old actor Joe Adekwagh, who slumped and died while MC'ing at an event.

The man who painted my office in June died two Sundays ago, from heart related problems.

Another 34 year old woman died while giving birth, doctors said she had a heart attack.

Shouldn't this give us cause for worry? Maybe it's not an issue where you reside, but it's becoming one over here.

Some Nigerians don't know when to stop and take a break.

I have some whites friends over here who work in oil companies. They work for six weeks and take two weeks off. Some work for a month and take the next month off. But Nigerians work year in and year out. We work until our system break down. Taking holidays is a luxury we think we can't afford.

Doctors have stressed so many times the importance of taking a break sometimes. Don't over work yourself. If you make all that money and you die while at it, who enjoys it?

Please take sometime off to take care of yourself and your health. It's very important.

I'm going off next week, will tell you all about it when the time comes.

Akon is at it again...

Akon who has denied being a polygamist and lies about his age will not be getting married to twenty-three year old model Rachel Ritfeld. The British beauty opens up about not being able to be one of Akon’s wives:

“The reality check really came when Akon told me he had his fifth child with one of his wives. For the first few months I got completely freaked out because even though I knew he had other wives, I never really thought about him being with them because his main attention was always on me - or so I thought. He does not live with his wives but the birth of his latest child made everything become real and made me realize that I would always have to share the man I love while accepting his other relationships. At first I was very supportive but I began to question that if I was taking him into consideration and he was taking his family into consideration, who was taking me into consideration? The answer was ‘nobody’ so I decided I could no longer be apart of Akon’s world.”

“The one thing I wanted from Akon was for him to be monogamous to me but he could not grant me my wish. I thought I could handle the idea of becoming one of his wives in the beginning but who’s to say some other woman he meets won’t capture his heart? I soon realised that he was not the man for me. There were times when I wanted us to share quality time together like ordinary couples do, such as going out to dinner or cuddling up together in front of the TV but it was always impossible. I had to always wait until he had time out of his busy schedule or wait until I had a day-off so I could fly half way around the world to see him. The situation began to become a strain on my heart.”

Tyra Banks quote

Tyra Banks discussed feminine hygiene this week on her talk show and shares a little advice:
“You know what my mom used to say? That you don’t need douche because the vagina is a self cleaning oven.”
Tyra, seriously?

Georgia is going through one of their worst droughts in history and they could be out of drinking water in a handful of months. Hope that doesn't happen.

Eddie Murphy's ex-wife Nicole Murphy looks...?

Beyonce's Cosmo cover/shoot

Exquisite, beautiful and very confident Beyonce. This lady knows how to take a good foto. Who loves Beyonce more than me?

Meanwhile, America, you have a funny president o...

England, you also have a funny queen.

Happy weekend.

Friday 9 November 2007

Naija Entertainment News.

Today was a crazy day for me. Ask Gbemi. We went to Apapa for a business meeting. I parked my car in front a gate…shouldn’t have I know…but is that enough to damage my car you crazy people? Came back 3 hours later and found that not only had they moved my car, they badly damaged the bumper and stuck the car on a pavement. If that car was a human being, it would be in serious coma right now. All those who touched my car today, waka to you. lol! Not even funny.

Speaking of cars, my bosom friend and Sound City presenter, Denrele Edun, has finally bought himself one. He acquired a Toyota Corolla some days back. I’m so happy for him.

Anyway, I bring you Naija Entertainment News.

Elegance & Style Awards 2007
I buy Encomium magazine every week, just to keep abreast with all the gossip happenings in Naija and it wasn't until today my younger sis noticed my name in one of the mags Style awards. The ad has been running for weeks now, I usually glance through and flip to the next page, never paid it much attention, luckily someone else took an interest in it and brought it to my attention. It's called Encomium Elegance and Style Awards 2007 and they had so many categories. I was nominated in a category called Most Elegant Women.

Here are the nominees in that same category
Agbani Darego
Stephanie Okereke
Bisola Dejonwo
Dunni Igbinedion
Ibidun Ajayi-Ighodalo
Jennifer Obayuwana
Lanre Da Silva Ajayi
Linda Ikeji
Oluchi Orlandis
Omowunmi Akinnifesi
Tundun Abiola
Stella Damasus Aboderin
Sylvia Edem Emechete
Bella Adenuga
Linda Mesrob
Elizabeth Elohor Isiohor

Seriously, I don't know what some names are doing there...including mine. Elegant ke? Me? lol. I don't even know how to be that, don't try to be...but it's nice to be recognised...

There are other categories like Most Stylish Men, All time beauty queens, 10 most powerful people in fashion, best spas, best make-up artists, best promoters of fashion, best style writers/editors, best lounges, most dashing celebrity couples etc...

Maybe one day, I'll type out all the nominees in each category. Too long a list.

Tuface Idibia News
Though he's left the hospital, 2baba as he is fondly called left the hospital with 12 pellets in his thigh. He doesn't limp or feel any pain, but he will have to follow the doctors instructions for the pellet to come out one after the other. After his release from the hospital, a thanksgiving party was held for him at Planet One Events place tagged 'Back to Grace'. Then last week, friends and fans at his Festac residence also decided to hold a thanksgiving party for him at Festac...well, that one didn't go well. Boys started fighting, throwing weapons, harrassing girls etc. Tuface who was present at the show, was taken to safety and never re-appeared even after everyone calmed down and the show continued.

Also, there are rumours that Tuface and on-again and off-again girlfriend Annie Macauley are back in love. Those two and their love sef...after seven years together, it's hard to let go...especially when love is still there.

Soul E at war with former record label
I'm sure y'all know there's a war going on between Soul E and his label, Colossal Records. The war started a few months back as a result of the artiste quitting the label before the appointed time. Both parties are now in court to settle their rift. The label has gotten an injunction preventing Soul E (real names, Emmanuel Okose) from parading himself as Soul E. TV and Radio stations have also been barred from either playing the singer's videos or granting any artist called Soul E interview.
The affidavit in support of the motion in favour of Colossal states that
-Soul E is restained from using the name Soul E
-Can't release any album using that name
-Can't grant an interview as Soul
-He's also restrained from from releasing any new album till the case is finally settled
-Restrained from the use of the copyrighted album 'Naija is blessed', use of registered beats of all tracks in the said album, can not remix any of the songs...etc, until the determination of the suit. Wow!

Ini Edo engaged?
Shhhh! Please don't say you read this here o..I'm warning y'all o lol. I read in one mag today that Nollywood actress, Ini Edo got engaged to her lover in Dubai some weeks back. They allege she is now rocking a beautiful expensive engagement ring and is planning a wedding for next year. I don't believe this story, just thought to share it anyway.

Ben Bruce stages party for love child
Ben treated his love child, Cody, to a swell party on Monday October 22, 2007. The venue was the multi million naira Silverbird Galleria. It was a costume party and had a lot of the young boy's friends in attendance.

BM PRO presents 'Secrets of the professionals: Meet the experts.
The luxury and exclusive lifestyle workshop
*BMPRO Make up Lagos
*Bobby's Signature
*Madres Accessories Abuja etc
Come along to the 1st ever exclusive beauty day in Abuja tagged "Secrets of the professionals-Meet the experts.
Venue: Shehu Musa Yar'adua Centre, Abuja
Date: Sunday, November 18th
Time 1pm
Tickets-N20, 000 per participant
For enquiries and ticket reservation-Faces Makeover, 018958856, 08062224108.

'Most girls in the industry (Acting) are now prostitutes"- Saheed Balogun "You just see every Tom, Dick and Harry wanting to become a producer, actor because they want to make money and that has culminated into so many ugly things you hear these days. I am very sorry to say this openly, many of the girls have to sleep with marketers to make money. They have to sleep with a lot of producers too. They have turned prostitution to a means of livelihood" Saheed Balogun, prominent Yoruba actor.

Another hot gossip. Y'all know that elegant lady of style Grace Egbagbe was in a sizzling romance with Liz Benson's Ex, Lanre Nzeribe. Well, that relationship has collapsed after two years. So many allegations, too long a story. Just tot u might want to know.

Katherine Edoho out of town
Emotionally troubled AM Express presenter (on NTA), and wife of 'Who wants to be a millionaire' presenter Frank Edoho, is out of town. Katherine traveled around 12 noon on Friday Nov 2nd 200 with her two children. No one knows where she's gone to. Hope she finds her feet again. A bad marriage is the worst thing that can happen to anyone. So girls, look before you leap abeg.

Charly Boy set to release album
Charly boy is getting ready to release another album which will be in both audio and video formats. Artistes like Sound Sultan, Asha and a few others featured in it. The album was technically produced by various seasoned producers across the country and about eight videos have been shot already. promotional tracks will hit the airwaves very soon.

They say NTA's Mariam Anazoda is finally pregnant after four years of marriage. If it's true, then Thank God!

Nkoyo Ibori was arrested last week at the Heathrow Airport, UK, for money laundering. She is to appear before a London court in January 2008.

Champayne dinner and concert
Featuring: Brian Mcknight, Sisqo, Soul II Soul and many more
Venue: Eko Hotel and Suites
Date: Nov 25th
For reservations call 08033886638

Finally, Here's wishing a happy birthday to CWB. Wishing you the very best that life has to offer. Love to the family. Kisses.

It's to twelve, way past my bedtime. I'm tired, I'll bring you more gist later.


Wednesday 7 November 2007

Katherine Edoho's interview

Our softsell mags finally came out today. On the front cover of Encomium magazine was Katherine Edoho, the wife of Frank Edoho, the guy who had an opinion about single women and 'their' habits.

Well, for reasons best known to Katherine, she also decided to grant a tell-all interview to Encomium magazine.

I know I talk too much lol, but this couple have taken the crown.

Here's what Katherine had to say about her husband and marriage.

Headline: "Frank Edoho is a beast. He batters me at the slightest provocation" - Wife

You courted each other for close to five years, did you notice any trace of swiftness to anger in him in those days?
Katherine "No. You could see snippets of temper then, but that's where it ends. Do you think if I had seen this I would have entered? He is a generous man but because he is generous does not mean he would beat everything he has given me?"

So, what actually caused this last beating?
"He said I wanted to run away with his kids. I told him I wanted to travel so that we could take a break a little. I told him I was traveling to Brazil because I didn't want him to trace my whereabouts until after one week. Perhaps he would have enough time to calm down. I was expecting him to sit me down and ask "Why Brazil?" instead he started shouting, saying I want to take his kids from him. He got violently physical, he took my box from me. I travelled without anything. He trailed me to the airport to beg me and I said "Don't come near me, you cannot be a mad man in the morning, and you are sane in the afternoon. He was coming close to me, I was moving back. He said why are you moving back? I said you are asking me? Do I know the next thing you would do here?" Then, I was bleeding, because he pushed me and I cut my leg somewhere. I was not supposed to travel with our son, because he was dragging him with me. I started crying, telling the cabin members not to leave me behind. So I was running and putting pressure on my leg and bleeding the more. When I came back, I told my younger brother "Please, the kind of beating they gave me before I travelled, I cannot take it two times. Help me to come and pack my belongings, just your presence alone...if you don't come with me, I'll take police to go and pack my things from the house because I need peace. For now, I cannot have it at home. When we reached home, my son said "Mummy, didnt daddy say you should not come back to the house?"

In the course of those beatings, have you ever retaliated physically?
"It's instinctive, I grew up with boys. Somehow I'll fight back or push, but you can't compare a woman's strenght to that of a man. The last beating was something else. I was busy dodging my eyes because Frank punched me as if he was fighting with his fellow man. For many days I couldn't make use of my left eye. I wore glasses throughout my stay in Cameroun. I kept crying and shouting "my mummy o". The headache? It was migrain times ten."

Frank also said he doesn't like you mingling with unmarried women, don't you think he has a point?"
"Like what? I only have two unmarried friends. One is my brother's fiancee, the other is Thelma, my colleague in NTA."

"Whats the reason he gives for not wanting Thelma by your side?"
"He says he doesn't like her aura, and I tell him I don't like your PA's aura too. I dont evidence against his PA, but there is something about him that is not just right. I am perceptive. There is something about that guy that is not quite right."

But the bible says women should submit to their husbands. If you do away with these single women, dont you think there will be peace in your home?
"I just told you that the last time he beat me was because we were supposed to meet somewhere at a particular time. I was delayed somehow, so when I got to a place, I didn't see him. He later called me and said "where are you" I said I was at home. He said, "Liar". I told him I went for salsa that I had gone home. He didn't believe me. Now, what has single girls got to do with that?. I don't involve my friends in anything about my home. I've left home, I paid for a place I wouldn't want disclosed. He sees the kids in their school."

What do you think would serve as a solution to all these?
"He's making a move for reconciliation (shows this reporter two different text messages from Frank) "I apologise for having slapped you, I really admit that what I did was beastly. But please come back, I've learnt my lesson". My sister, it's not coming back, it's how do we stop that?"

She went on and on...I'm stopping here 'cos I'm tired of typing.

Seriously, I don't know what to say...except that I'm a little disappointed that Frank hits women (His wife can't lie can she?). I remember inviting them to my Magazine launch last year and they both honored my invitation. I sat beside them and thought they made a perfect couple. Young, good looking, with great jobs.

Well, I guess it's not always as it seems...right?

What do you guys think?

Tuesday 6 November 2007


I was going to bring you Naija Entertainment gists today...but can't find neither City People nor Encomium magazines on the news stands. They usually come out on Mondays, don't know what's wrong this week. But hopefully they'll be available tomorrow. So expect that tomorrow...

While we are waiting for that, there's something else I'd like to talk about. HOMOSEXUALITY.

I met a proudly gay guy today...and it was a big eye opener. In this part of the world, it's extremely rare to find proudly gay guys. Guys who tell you I'm gay and very proud to be one. Infact wonders what heterosexual men see in women.

I remember a few years ago, a Unilag student came on Funmi Iyanda's show to proudly declare he was gay and was asking for gay rights in Naija.

After coming out openly.....he's now based in the UK.

Guess our people aren't ready for such!

In the business I'm in, some of the guys actively in it are either gay or have homosexual tendencies. The don't come out in the open about their sexual preference but you can tell with body movement, the way they talk and flock around themselves and especially the way they ignore and bitch at women that there's something off about them. Oh, I've met quite a few of them. They are quite creative, talented and fun to be with, more fun to look at them making passes at each other...

The one I met today tried for a while to educate me on thrills and frills of homosexuality...an hour later I was more confused than before.

I don't understand it one bit. It's still a big mystery to me.

Why would any man have strong physical and emotional attraction to men that they don't usually feel for women?

What is the real explanation of why some men are gay and some are not? In a family of four brothers, how do you get three straight ones and a gay one? What happened to the gay one? He was born on the wrong day?

Is homosexuality as a result of genetic influences? Is it hereditary? Biological? Social experiences? Peer pressure? Is it spiritual?

Does anyone know?

Jokes and Pix

It's 2 am and I'm blogging. See the love I have for y'all?
Anyway, here are a few jokes to put smiles on your faces
Starting with this...
Answer this question
"In which direction is the bus pictured below traveling?"
Look carefully at the picture.
Do you know the! answer? (The only possible answers are "left" or "right.")
Think about it
Still don't know?
Okay, I'll tell you.
The pre-schoolers all answered "left."
When asked, "Why do you think the bus is traveling in the left direction?"
They answered: "Because you can't see the door."
How do you feel now ??? I know, me too.

Yes, please go ahead and hit your head on the wall...lol.


...this one will crack you up...be ready to laugh till you drop...

These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.

ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
WITNESS: No, I just lie there.

ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget.
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?

ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan!

ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo?
WITNESS: We both do.
WITNESS: Yes, voodoo.

ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?

ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-one-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS: Uh, he's twenty-one.

ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: Are you shitt'in me?

ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS: Uh.... I was gett'in laid!

ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS: Are you kidding? Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?

ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death.
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS: Now, whose death do you suppose terminated it?

ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?

ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.

ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?WITNESS: All my autopsies are performed on dead people. Would you like to rephrase that?

ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK?
What school did you go to?

ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table, wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him!

ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
WITNESS: Huh....are you qualified to ask that question?

--- And the best for last: ---

ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?

ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law, dumbass.

Here's another one...

A goner indeed

A man and a woman were dating. She, being of a religious nature, had held back the worldly pleasure that he wanted from her so badly. In fact, he had never even seen her naked.

One day, as they slowly drove down the freeway, she remarked about his slow-driving habits. "I can't stand it anymore," she told him. "Let's play a game. For every 5 miles per hour over the speed limit [60 MPH] you drive, I'll remove one piece of clothing.

He enthusiastically agreed and sped up the car.
He reached the 65 MPH mark, so she took off her blouse.
* At 70 off came the pants.
* At 75 it was her bra...and
* At 80 her panties.

Now seeing her naked for the first time...and traveling faster than he ever had before...he became very excited and lost control of the car. He veered off the road, went over an embankment and hit a tree!

His girlfriend was not hurt, but he was trapped. She tried to pull him free but alas he was stuck. "Go to the road and get help," he said.
"I don't have anything to cover myself with!" she replied. The man felt around, but could only reach one of his shoes.
"You'll have to put this between your legs to cover it up," he told her.
So she did as he said and went up to the road for help.

Along came a truck driver. Seeing a naked, crying woman along the road, he pulled over to hear her story.
"My boyfriend! My boyfriend!" she sobs, "He's stuck and I can't pull him out!"
The truck driver looking down at the shoe between her legs replies, "Ma'am, if he's in that far, I'm afraid he's a goner!"

Men NEVER listen ? Nice one, enjoy!
A man and his wife receive a letter from their daughter who went to study overseas:
My beloved Parents, I miss you so much. I don't know when I'm coming home, but it seems not anytime soon. It breaks my heart to think that by the time I get back you'll be too old. So enclosed you will find a bottle of a potion I have invented. It will make you young, so when I return you'll be the same age as I left you. NOTE: "Please take only one drop"NOTE: "Please take only one drop"

So they open the envelope and in it there is a bottle with a red potion..The husband looks at the wife and says: "You go first." So the wife opens the bottle and takes a drop, there after the husband follows. Indeed they do turn 5 years younger. A year passes and the daughter returns home to find her mother young and beautiful, carrying a baby on her back.

The mother proceeds to tell her daughter how the potion worked and made her look young. The daughter is delighted and asks about her father. "Your father, my child, got so jealous that I was young and beautiful so he drank the whole bottle."
"So where is he?"
"Oh, that's him I have on my back
Never go to HR
After 2 years of selfless service, a man realized that he has not been promoted, no transfer, no salary increase no commendation and that the Company is not doing any thing about it. So he decided to walk up to His HR Manager one morning and after exchanging greetings, he told his HR Manager his observation. The boss looked at him, laughed and asked him to sit down saying. My friend, you have not worked here for even one day.
The man was surprised to hear this, but the manager went on to explain.
Manager:- How many days are there in a year?
Man:- 365 days and some times 366
Manager:- how many hours make up a day?
Man:- 24 hours
Manager:- How long do you work in a day?
Man:- 8am to 4pm . i.e. 8 hours a day.
Manager:- So, what fraction of the day do you work in hours?
Man:- (He did some arithmetic and said 8/24 hours i.e. 1/3(one third)
Manager:- That is nice of you! What is one-third of 366 days?
Man:- 122 (1/3x366 = 122 in days)
Manager:- Do you come to work on weekends?
Man:- No sir
Manager:- How many days are there in a year that are weekends?
Man:- 52 Saturdays and 52 Sundays equals to 104 days
Manager:- Thanks for that. If you remove 104 days from 122 days, how many days do you now have?
Man:- 18 days.
Manager:- OK! I do give you 2 weeks sick leave every year. Now remove that 14 days from the 18 days left. How many days do you have remaining?
Man:- 4 days
Manager:- Do you work on New Year day?
Man:- No sir!
Manager:- Do you come to work on workers day?
Man:- No sir!
Manager:- So how many days are left?
Man:- 2 days sir!
Manager:- Do you come to work on the (National holiday )?
Man:- No sir!
Manager:- So how many days are left?
Man:- 1 day sir!
Manager:- Do you work on Christmas day?
Man:- No sir!
Manager:- So how many days are left?
Man:- None sir!
Manager:- So, what are you claiming?
Man:- I have understood, Sir. I did not realise that I was stealing Company money all these days.


Naomi Campbell's dress is...?

TY Bello's hair is...?

Pregnant Halle Berry's boobs now look...?

Naija Entertainment gist coming next. Stay tuned!

Monday 5 November 2007

Question + Apprentice Africa

Do long distance relationships work? I mean, you're on one side of the world and they're on the other side. How do you make it work?

Apprentice Africa
Have you heard of The Apprentice; Donald Trump's TV show which hedescribed as a 16-week job interview? The world's biggest businessreality show comes to Africa with title The Apprentice Africa hostedin Nigeria, produced by The Executive Group and Storm Vision.

18 candidates from across Africa are to compete to win an executivejob with an annual salary of $200,000 and an executive car. Someonegets fired off the show every week till we have the last woman or manstanding.Auditions will be held in Washington DC, Lagos, Abuja, Enugu, London,Accra, Nairobi, Dar es Salam or Kampala.

This is a great opportunityfor Africans living in the Diaspora to come home and make good oninternational TV. This is the ultimate job interview.The CEO of The Apprentice Africa is Mr. Biodun Sobanjo, Chairman CEO of TROYKA Holdings parent company of Insight Grey, Media Comm, Optimum Exposures, Halogen Services and four other companies. Biodun Sobanjoembodies class, style, charisma, and business persona.

Application is free and still on. You may apply online athttp://www.theapprenticeafrica.com/. Details about the show's format are alsoavailable at the website too.

Hope y'all had a great weekend. See y'all soon.

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