'May I not marry a man like my father..." | Welcome to Linda Ikeji's Blog

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Thursday 17 July 2014

'May I not marry a man like my father..."

When I saw this tweet this morning, I was taken aback at first...'You don't want to marry a man like your father?"...but then I thought about it again...there might actually be many women out there who don't want men like their fathers. Many in fact! That someone is your flesh and blood does not mean that they are perfect or what you wish for yourself.

Are you one of those women? And what's your reason? Let's discuss!

248 comments:

1 – 200 of 248   Newer›   Newest»
Anonymous said...

i pray someone like my dad will not my way to ask my hand in marriage. in Jesus name. Amen. nice write up

Unknown said...

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm. ALOT OF WOMEN CERTAINLY DNT WANNA MARRY A MAN LIKE THEIR FATHERS BUT SUMONE BETA IN ALL ASPECT............
.

DOBY DOBY said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
DOBY DOBY said...

Im one of dem. . Dnt pray to marry a man lyk man father.. he doesn't accept he's wrong evn wen its obvious nd u can neva correct him or tell him wat to do nd its bcos hes very intelligent

BONARIO NNAGS said...

Enough already!
For the past few weeks its been men, men, men.
What about the women, we forget its the women that make a home.
Always portraying men in bad light.
Sometimes its better to ask what women don't want than what they want.

~BONARIO~says so via NOKIA LUMIA

Unknown said...

I will definitely marry someone like my dad anytime anyday...he is d best dad ever

Bonita Bislam said...

Like seriously. ? We're suppose to discuss our fathers here? Well the poster has her reason and so are others.Some dads are wife beaters,children abusers,chronic womanizers,typical drunkards,gossips etc and so are some mums.Now tell me why a Dad like this can be a role model in husband selection?

Unknown said...

Abeg, hide the girl's name even if you leave her handle showing... Don't go and put someone in trouble at home abeg

Unknown said...

I'll talk on behalf of my sisters... how do u explain a father beating his 25yr old daughter? calling police men to d house,locked her up nd beat satan out of her? wat do u call a man dat wud rather see u cry dan laff? wat wud u call a man dat treats outsiders like god but his own family like trash?? wat do u call a man dat once u hear his car horns ur mind flies like a plane? wud any sane girl wish to Mary such a man and allow him treat dier kids d way her dad treated her?... I WAS SURPRISED MY SISTERS CRIED DURING MY DADS BURIAL, I'M SURE D TEARS WERE FAKE OR TO IMPRESS PPLE, OR MAYBE COS DEY WERE WOMEN,

Nana said...

me too! I love my dad only cause that fact that he gave me life is unchanging but,my no.1 ptiority before i got married waa never to marry a man like him. My dad is the most laid back nonchallant negative minded person i know. He left my mum to do everything all by herself with 9 children. He feels he has done his role by giving birth to us and the rest is left to my poor mum. Then he stopped my mum from continuing her school and from working too... If i continue to name the many reasons why i am not BfF with my dad,Lindiway,u'l shut your blog down. To cut the long story short,i am the happiest woman alive because i got what i wanted,i married the man that is d the direct opposite of my dad! He is everything my dad could never be!

Anonymous said...

My father is a drunk,lazy and does not care about our Education

Martin Beck Nworah said...

Young ladies in Nigeria suffer untold hardships at the hands of their father but decide to keep quite because of family peace. Many are assaulted or sexually abused by their father and the young girl won't open up. On the other side,the father may be a die-hard stingy man. The type that will bring 500 naira and expect you to prepare soup and stew for the whole week. Several other reasons may abound as well,the dad may be the night walker or the President of women's association. The young lady is just been honest,may God answer her prayers.



MBN.

Angie Cape said...

Luckily, I got married to a man like my father(may his gentle soul RIP)..; God fearing and lives life to the fullest..
Single ladies, look before you dive in!


*My R1.50c comment*

Anonymous said...

Me too, I pray I don't marry a man like my father

Unknown said...

Well she may have a good reasons to say that...because some man are so wicked and heartless who knows if he has attempt to rape her.

Amarachukwu. said...

Am not... Waiting to read those reasons.

LIDDIEBERRY said...

I PRAY I marry a man like my father... He is the kindest man i have ever seen in my life and whenever my mum prays for me, she do tell me that may God provide an amazing man like my father for me... He would put the affair of his wife and children first before his own, even when he prays, he starts with my mum and we the children before praying for himself, That is why i adore and respect him, so if a man does not treat me with respect, i will never ever imagine a future with him, i would just conclude in my mind that he is not THE RIGHT ONE for me

Justyswt said...

I love my dad. Though he could be so annoying sometimes.

Unknown said...

Girls only pls......mrflash581@gmail.com

CHERRY said...

May I marry a man like my dad Amen.

Anonymous said...

may my sisters not marry a man like my father also...DAN BOIZ SEGUN

Uche said...

Linda, I am one (1) of them. To discuss, space no go reach cos the story full ground. Cos of my father i am not even considering men from or close to my village.

Unknown said...

Let's discuss indeed...Amebo things. Lmaooo

ugo said...

This is deep!

Anonymous said...

Amen to that. Not enought money and he doesn't rili care.

Anonymous said...

I want a father like my father to my children, I mean my dad was perfect, transparent, understanding, supportive you name it, so caring he knew our monthly cycles, like you'd wake up in the morning and find a sanitary pads on ur door way, he dropped that when he returned late last night and u were asleep, he was the best any child could ask for, but at the same time I don't want a man like my father for a husband, those two fell apart, he fell out of love with my mother got a mistress, like my mom wud hear he just got a new car for his mistress when her own car is so bad she can't even drive it, my dad was the best daddy, but the strain on his relationship with my mmom put a deep strain in my heart, I only kept wishing things got better, and it never did

Juliebabe said...

I'm not one of them. My dad is not perfect but he is good in terms of provision, shelter and protection above all his is caring. A i can say to her is EYAH.

Anonymous said...

I hate to digress but I am so blessed to have my father in my life and it completely breaks my heart that others do not get to have a great relationship with their father.
Yes, my father is Nigeria, a true man of God. Is he perfect? No! but he is perfectly imperfect for our family. He has totally lead our family in the way of Christ and continues to be an example. Even at 61 years old and in retirement, he would wash dishes, clean the house and he is still the Head and sole provider of the family and supports the birth of my business 100%.
I cannot thank God enough for birthing me to such an Amazing man.
So do I pray for a man like my father, oooooo Yes! I pray for even better.
Greatful even in my little!

Anonymous said...

The girl must have bad experience of his father..
Also Check this post..
... Photos: Ladies Stripped Iyanya Live On Stage in US ..Click to View

Unknown said...

MY DAD IS SO COOL ALTHOUGH HE IS STRICT OO...DOESNT TAKE BULLSHIT..BUT GODFORBID TO MARRY A MAN LIKE MY UNCLE...A MAN COZ OF HIS WIFE IS RICH BUT STILL RESPECT HIM ..TAKE CARE OF THE HUSBAND AND FAMILY ..THE HUSBAND Z NOW TRICKY,STINGY GREEDY AND EVEN PLANNING AGAINST THE WIFE..BAD ADVICE DO SPOIL FAMILY..INSTEAD THE MORE HE PLANS TO DEMOLISH THE WIFES BUSINESS THE MORE THE WIFE IS GROWING...PLZ IT Z NOT SHAME? WELL AS FOR ME....LINDA IKEJI,MY MUMMY AND MY UNCLES WIFE ARE MY MENTOR...THEY TAUGHT ME HOW TO BE INDEPENDENCE AND AM WORKING ON IT...WELL I am the CEO OF THIS WEBSITE : http://allconcern.com AND ALSO THE CEO OF THIS BLOG : mercycherry.blogspot.com

Anonymous said...

My dad can be awesome of course wen he's sober bt when he's nt, he says d nastiest things 2 my sisters nd 1, my mom has suffered so many injuries cz of him...2 mention a few...Linda pls post my comment.

Unknown said...

I will gladly marry a girl like my mama...infact my wife 2 be has to come do one year IT with my mum sef.

ND said...

well, i dot knw my father, i was three months old whn he died, and i was told his tough and can dot b pleased.
so on dis issue, i wot like to marry a man like him, who can not be pleased.thnk God for the kind of hubby i have. and today is his birth day. lemme use dis medium to tell him how much i love him, he has been a father, a friend, husband, my inspiration in the world to come i pray we meet again. love u dear.

Anonymous said...

I want a man like my dad...my parents have the best of marriage..I am 28 and not the first child and I have never seen my parents quarrel(I have never seen them quarrel at all)...I used to pray that if God should make my marriage half as lovely as theirs then I am okay(but its still okay if I have double sha)...I always thank God for my parents,cos they are the best...Adaora

SWS said...

I 100% concur. A nasty,spiteful,twisted,vindictive and bitter old man, who takes his children's name to shrine??? God forbid! AMEN!!!!

Anonymous said...

Yes u shld marry a man dats like ur father if u ar vry sure dat both of u lov each order

Unknown said...

Everybody wants to be happy.no woman wants a man that will not give them joy.maybe her dad never gave her mum joy.

Anonymous said...

I'd never want to marry a man like my dad. He's a polygamist wif plenty kids which he didn't bother to look after financially or emotionally. We have no connection and I could go for years not talking to him and even when I call I have to introduce myself. I could write a book on y I dnt want a man like my father lol

Anonymous said...

lnda u too like amebio. hmmm! discuss keer?

drama queen said...

I'm married nd b4 I did,i nva wshd for a man lyk my dad.i always wishd for a man lyk my mom's dad.dnt get me wrong,my dad is a good father nd husbnd.but he lacks sm qualities that I cnt overlook.my Hsbnd is romantic,caring and understanding.my dad on the other hand is domineering,easily offended and not understanding.

Anonymous said...

AMEN o! I don't want to curse my dad. But I wouldnKt wish dat kind of husband on my worst enemy. Seriously, my mum deserves a lifetime achievement award for putting up with him for more than 25 years! If na me, I for don give him rat poison.

Anonymous said...

My own dad is d best in d world. I am seriously praying hard to marry a man like him. Cos he is just too caring and loving father.

Anonymous said...

linda, I too don't wanna marry a manlike my father not that he was that bad oooo, he will pet us and all but the needs were neglected, he wasn't a good husband to my mum, my mum regrets her marriage to my dad till today duo he is late her only consolation is us. He let his step kids abuse my mum verbally, physically and emotionally even wen she was carrying 80% of the family needs, providing food, paying our fees from primary school and some part of ma step siblings own.The worse part is that he was a pastor and i was very ashamed to tell people he was a pastor even wen ppl that knew me from home in school said it i denied it cos i was ashamed. the Unspeakable one is that my stupid village ppl said my mum should come back from abroad and kip her head for them to shave off her hair cos den she couldn't come back cos she didn't have her papers but she did the burial rites with ma village ppl abroad there, dis is lik 13years since his death ooooooo, or they will get her wen i wanna marry. Imagine them still wanting to cause dis poor woman pains even after almost 13years of her husbands death. IT WILL NEVER BE WELL WITH MY FATHERS COMPOUND EVIL DOERS, MAY DER WAY BE VERY DARK AND SPILERY AND MAY THEY EAT THEIR TEARS FOR THEIR WICKEDNESS. LINDA MAKE I STOP HERE MBOK B4 I START CRYING.WISH MY DAD EVER LISTEN TO MY MUM.

Anonymous said...

I share same opinion, that has always been my prayer, he was never there in all my four sisters growing up, thanks to my mum, who knows what we have turned into. now he is without job and he has been trying to turn our hearts against our mother.... long story! but i pray not to marry a man like my father....

Anonymous said...

Makes plenty sense! He never abused or ill treated us buh given an option, i will def look for better; too many annoying xters.

Ruth said...

Not all father are the same

Ijanyi Mitch said...

Well I guess this column is 4 the ladies# am out

lgho said...

I seriously agree wit her...lost my mum September last year cos of dad..he got married ad mum BP was uncontrollable can't really say much here linda...may I not marry a man like my father

Anonymous said...

As for me I love my father.


Check out http://snaphit.blogspot.com

Unknown said...

Ye linda there are people like that. I'm one of them. I asked God not to give me my father's type as a husband and God gave me a wonderful man.

Anonymous said...

funny enough, there are women out there wishing they married someone like your father. this life is complex

Anonymous said...

LINDA PLS POST MY LONG COMMENT ABOVE IS TOO LONG TO IGNORE COS I POURED MY HEART OUT DER. MOREOVER DIS IS THE FIRST TIME AM COMMENTING ON UR BLOG. LOVE XXXXXXXX

Anonymous said...

I am definitely the number woman who prays not to marry a man like my father...he would be shot! within 2wks of marriage. never will I marry a man that doesn't value family...just thinks he can buy his children and sell their mum...imagine. Well, as for me na to continue to chop money,clean mouth and waka comot wiv no brake light....in order to take my children far far away from my father and his paternal entourage....*repping Naija from afar*

lil missy said...

Linda cme wats ur problem sef....i tk out tym to post a comment on ur mumuish blog n u wnt post it.....mscheeeewwww.Very annoying

Anonymous said...

i love my dad. but I don't pray to marry some one like him. GOD FORBIDDDD. he is an alcoholic and a failure who totally depends on mum for everything and nags and whine like a woman.MY MAMA DEY TRY.

omaahhonda said...

I sha dnt wnt a man lk my dad.

Anonymous said...

Linda I'm surely one of those people,my dad was a stranger to me,he abandoned my mum and four of us from when I was like 5yrs old,and up until I wanted to get married like 20yrs later he never cared of even called occasionally to ask of us. Sometimes I wonder what I lld have become if my mum abandoned us like he did too,my mumm was d father n mother in d ouse,always working round d clock to make ends meet. Inever felt the love of a father,i always yearned for a father figure in the house to the extent that we were now calling our uncle Daddy. He's late now and I'm sorry to say but I didn't really get emotional when I heard d news of his death cause I didn't know him.............pretty T

Her Excellency said...

Sure Linda there are lots of them out there. Not all men that have children are FATHERS.

Anonymous said...

I sure as hell DO NOT want to marry a man like my father. My father couldn't give his children the most important thing in life; Love! He was a tyrant and is a very cold man. He chose his current wife over the happiness of his children. Now he's in his old age, he's very lonely. He hasn't got a strong bond or relationship with any of his kids. The so called current wife is busy gallivanting round the country and doing runs all in the name of politics. She doesn't cook or care for her husband. This is the time in his life where he should be enjoying the fruits of his labour but unfortunately, a man who has about 17 children is now like a childless man.
My father is NOT my role model and I would never use him as a yardstick to compare to men out there. God forbid I marry a man like my father.

Anonymous said...

Have always prayed never to marry a man like my father too. While growing up my dad use to be strict and always shouting at us, there was no dad and kids relationship. my house use to be a military abode. You there not play or watch Tv if his around. He use to beat us as if we were criminals. As soon as me and my sisters gain admission into the university we never came back to stay with him.

Anonymous said...

I married my husband just because he was opposite my father.too stingy to a fault.doesnt care about your well being .And he is a very rich business man .dont know what he does with his money just to buy land,buy shops and building nonsense .Infact i think my sisters are also looking for someone who is just not like him.

Father dont know what it means to be a father.I thank God for my husband even though he may not be so rich ,he is just the kind of father i wish for my self.I envy my kids at times

Anonymous said...

I wouldn't want to marry a man like my dad

Anonymous said...

May I never be liike my mother iin law, nwanyi di cha si wicked. Tufiakwa

Stephen Ikiyei said...

I don't really know what made her alter such statement but for me in as much as i would not want to totally be the kind of man my father is I still appreciate some qualities he has (The good ones) and will always love to show those ones in my life... For me I will say "I would not want to totally be the kind of man my father was.

Blessing Njoh said...

May i never marry a man like my father, Amen! Reasons are tooooo much!

Anonymous said...

Hmmmmm...as for me..I dont want a man dat is stingy like my dad..dats y when I meet a guy my first way to even judge u is how u give..(mind u I am doing well..I have a fashion house and a well paying job)I cant stand a man that does not give. .after so many years of marriage. .I doubt if he can give her 500k and its painful cos he has...so he is a good man doesn't cheat but that stingy part I dont want it from any guy...so a man dat resembles my dad is a big No No trait for me

ary said...

Wouldn't want to marry someone like my mother and I love her to death. I can relate to that!

Anonymous said...

LINDA!LINDA!LINDA!
WHAT DO HAVE AGAINST MEN?I THINK IT'S HIGH TIME MEN STARTED BOYCOTTING YOUR BLOG.

ANDY

Unknown said...

Ok ngwanu.....start insulting n calling ur fathers all sorta Names. Lol

Anonymous said...

WELL LINDA MY DAD IS COMPLETELY AWESOME BUT IS A mr PERFECT AND I NEVER WANTED A mR PERFECT BUT I ENDED UP MARRYING A MAN WITH SIMILAR ATTRIBUTES AS MY FATHER. HOWEVER I WONT SAY THEY ARE COMPLETELY THE SAME BUT I WOULD SAY THE SEMBLANCE ARE THERE. AM GLAD ANYWAY I MARRIED HIM COS HE TOOK AFTER MY DADS CARING ATTRIBUTES AND STRONG HEAD. I WOULD RATHER SAY AM ONE OF THOSE LADIES WHO WOULD WANT TO MARRY A MAN LIKE HER DAD ANY DAY. WHO IS PERFECT ANYWAY?

Anonymous said...

I am..my father was never home and always disrespectful to my mum..While constantly avoiding responsibilities! God forbid I marry a man like him

Anonymous said...

I am..my father was never home and always disrespectful to my mum..While constantly avoiding responsibilities! God forbid I marry a man like him

Anonymous said...

I clearly understand! Even me as a guy, they r many traits in my father that I never want to b like, inherit or take after! Wat if the father is a womanizer, a wife beater, a cheat, a liar, a thief, a molester or even worse a serial murderer! Who wants that in a husband? Nobody! I guess she has seen something she doesn't nd wud never like to see her hubby b like in her dad.





#GozManuel Says#

Anonymous said...

Am one of dose dat wil lik to mary a man lik my father... #dady's gal

Anonymous said...

God forbid i marry a man like my father...because he is wicked and stingy he believes that any money he spends on his children is waste..infact sometimes i wish him dead because he is not useful to me ever since i was born...my mum pays all the damn bills...my fathers works in a company but nothing to show for it...my mum is very strong am not strong ;like her ooo so i cant marry a man like my father.

mbh said...

seeing this now is funny cos i just had to remind myself of same just last night.

Unknown said...

I will want to marry a man like my Dad over and over again. I have an over caring Dad, he takes care of us and our Mum like no man's business. My Dad set d standard on how a man Shoul d treat a woman for me and my siblings. He had us all girls and I never heard him complain for once about not having a boy instead he made sure he gave us all we ever need to be great in the society. I have the best Father in the world, he means more than anything to me, God knows that too.

Honsylglobal.com : UK Global Online Financial Advisers said...

Most decent ladies would rather fall in Luv with Guys like their Dad unlike the desperadoes. Most Guys too are inspired by their fathers. The state of the Nigerian Economy today has had a significant effect on this truism.

Anonymous said...

Anyone can be a father but it takes a truly special person to be a dad. I feel so unfortunate and unlucky to be the child of my father. He's a horrible horrible man and I prayed to God everyday that I will never marry an emotional, verbal and physical abuser like him. We have had money and comfort but no love and constant abuse from the time I was a child for me, my siblings and my mom. And the funny thing is that so many people do t know what we've had to go through.
For those of you who have had a dad, count yourself extremely lucky, cause i have been driven to the point of wanting to take my own life because of the pain this man has caused. But thank God, the fear of God will never allow that. I can only learn from my life and make sure when I have my own family I give them love that I never had. It's about to be a reality now : )

Anonymous said...

God forbid that I marry a man like my father.he is by far the worse father on earth I know.
A man that abandons 5 children for a woman to raise and yet expects their love and help now they are all grown up and successful.
#ill just stop here,getting really angry just typing about him#

Coquette x said...

I agree. In fact I've been saying this a lot lately and I've been consciously avoiding men who seem like they share certain characteristics with him. I love my father and I could not have asked for a better provider. Not only did I not lack anything growing up, I was also exposed to many opportunities due to his desire for his children to go forth and explore. If the man I marry is half the man my father is in certain respects then we're good. He is however not the greatest at maintaining "good interpersonal relationships" and I don't want to marry a man as...uneven tempered as he is.

Anonymous said...

I love my daddy to the moon & back for how he treated me but God pls let me not hv a husband like my father. He cheated on my mama numerous times has a child outside, didn't let her work gave her what HE felt she needed. God pls ive not been faithful 2 u but help me to be gud & let me not marry a man like my father!

Anonymous said...

Well I can always marry some one like father if I can have patience like my mum,. Don't get me wrong,. My Dad is my hero but there are some nasty altitude he will put up and I can't help but wonder how my mum manage to cope wt him..#teamchris

Anonymous said...

Yes I've always prayed to God to give me a man that is nothing like my father except for the wealth obviously! Character wise, he's just a cold, mean and heartless person! I wonder how he sleeps at night cause he is simply WICKED!!!

Cute G said...

She has her reasons.Linda if only you have come across some despicable men that calls themselves fathers.U wouldn't wanna have one as ur father and probably wish one as a husband would you?

Jenny said...

Oh yes! I'm no 1. Thank God I didn't marry a man like him. He was a terrible abuser. Physically, sexually, emotionally. A man that abuses his daughters is not a father. God gave me my husband to show me what men r not. Mothers open ur eyes n be sure ur daughters r safe with their fathers.

Anonymous said...

Yea, me too. Aunt Lin, I sent u a post sumtyms ago abt ma dad's behaviour buh u didn't respond...I cnt even wish ma enemy marries sum1 lyk ma dad

Anonymous said...

Yes o... there are people I wish not to have as my blood in my next world if there's any...



#Just saying#

Anonymous said...

May i never marry a woman like my mother!!!! she is obsessed with money

Anonymous said...

WELL THAT IS HER OWN CUP OF TEA..

FOR-FREE-MARRIAGE-ADVISORY ON ANY TOPIC, VIA, TEL/MEDIA-CHAT, @ "BLESSED ASSURANCE" ON FACEBOOK

FabMandy said...

I wished same like her Linda, but i ended up with one like him! He acted just like him (Abusive) and the marriage didn't last up to 2 years, unlike my mum who waited and endured and produced 6 of us! I could not take that much and so i left with a 6months pregnancy after loosing the 1st pregnancy and i had a boy, he is with me and i love him so much. #StoryOfMyLife

Debbie Chelsea said...

Me want 2 marry a man like my dad lindodo,my dad is d best father in d world(may his soul rest in peace)Amen *i miss him ☹ *

Unknown said...

a.k.a EDWIN CHINEDU AZUBUKO said...
.
Lmaoo, ur dad must be stingy as hell then.
.
.
***CURRENTLY IN JUPITER***

Anonymous said...

This was my only requirement before marriage... God granted my heart's desire

Anonymous said...

Linda Oh!she has removed the tweet,now shes begging you,i hope people learn,if your mouth dey scratch u before you talk brush your mouth,ntor @uberstunner.......at least you are now popular more than L.A.X

Anonymous said...

@uberstunner just gained 5 new followers,now u will know why we send post as anonymous,lol

Anonymous said...

I 2nd the tweet n am turning it into a prayer. Mine is jst a father figure no responsibility nothing at all,as unless as d ay in okay all E does is boost abt having kids E ws neva dere for n he is also Nt husband to my mum,e is jst living a life of his own.

www.glowyshoes.com said...

Its true nau...she might hv gone tru alot

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Peculiar said...

Hi Linda ur doing a great job here. I'm new on ur blog dis is actually my first comment. n abut d qstn Yep I am. I really dnt want a man like my father. He was soooo hard on us while growing up.

Anonymous said...

Yeah! Most girls I have met had said dat!

Anonymous said...

am one of them,I see wickedness and lack of love in his marriage with my mother,intact they are discouraging me in issue of marriage... nkemdirimeverista111@gmail.com

Kayjay0110 said...

Lindilicious! You said lets discuss like you would respond to any of the comments...Anyways, I love my daddy to bits but NAH to a hubby like him

REXOVIC said...

i share her sentiment and also not want to marry a man like my father !!

Ada Ada said...

Truth be told! I really dont want to marry a man like my father for so many reasons...

Anonymous said...

I am one of those women. My father is a bloody useless bastard. The most wicked man in all creation, and the devil reincarnate. Heavily into juju and evil. I can't even begin to elaborate, but I thank God for a praying mother who refused to stay in such a relationship, and had the strength to run away with her young children and provide for them. As for me ,I would rather never marry than to marry such a man!!!I reject it in Jesus name!Amen.

Unknown said...

may i not marry a woman like my father too.he beats women like goats and bully his children he never pay a penny for my school fee and those who does he want me to stay away from them beat me for no reason he make me feel like nobody at a point he said he disowned me all because i slept in my mother house i dont want a husband who is like that that is always my first prayer when it comes to praying for husband

Anonymous said...

I am most definitely one of those women. why? LONG STORY! But of course society says our mothers must endure till it kills them and also to protect the kids.

Anonymous said...

I will not like to marry a man like my dad oh, he is a good father but a terrible husband, my dad is a chronic womaniser with no age or class limit am sure he dated all our house helps . He is the reason why me and female siblings find it hard trusting our husbands even when they r as transparent as a magnifying glass

ixora said...

To sum it all up, my dad is a womanizer, he cheats on my mum a lot and treats us all like crap cuz he has the money..he's got no love for any of us and he says that all the time... I don't eva wanna marry a man like him, I think I will hurt that man so bad...

Anonymous said...

Its not surprising to me because ill never for one day wish to marry a man like my dad. My Dad maltreated my mum and followed every woman in skirt. My mum was with him when he had nothing but as son as he made it really big he had married several women and have several children from different woman, and the painful part is that he doesn't care about her well being at all. He buys the latest cars and builds houses everywhere but has not for once thought of what he can do to assist her even when she sacrificed her life for him.

GOZZY said...

My father is a role model to me but then,I cannot judge this lady for thinking otherwise.Nobody knows her story.

Anonymous said...

for me,I don't want to have some of my mummy's character though it's not her fault but its getting to me seriously.
I only pray God's wisdom through it all cos I cherish my mum but she doesn't realise it.

Anonymous said...

my father is d best father in d whole wide world...... #Doro classy#

Anonymous said...

dats her choice, guess she saw something so bad dat made her say dat

Anonymous said...

if I marry a man like my father it will be like a curse . thats all I can say.

Unknown said...

i always wish we never go on holiday in school then because i dont want to go home to his drama and torture he made me to start lying because am scared of been beaten blue and black he beats my step mum in front of me and my step siblings i dont think i will ever want to marry i made who always takes his frustration out on we his children i will never pray for a husband like my dad as am far away from him now he lives in Nigeria and i live in London i wont even go on vacation just because of him

Anonymous said...

it depends on the type of father she had. and life should only get better .

Unknown said...

Same here. My Dad was a good husband to my Mum until he got mrried to his 2nd wife without my Mum's knowledge, that was when he started maltreating my Mum. He started being partial in sharing thgs, concentrated in given things to the 2nd wife and her children, if not for the help of my Mum's relatives that took it upon them to train my elder ones, who now trained the rest of us. May his soul continue to rest in peace. So thank God I did not marry a man like him.

Anonymous said...

Where do u get these pics from?? Lol

Anonymous said...

Yes. My dad was a good and religious man but he was also lazy, made my mom work her hands off. Not my ideal kind of man.

Blessed said...

May I never marry a man like my father, a man who s selfish, carefree, a man that doesn't show love and to his family. A man who refused to acknowledge God's blessings to him. A lazy man that allowed my mother to take care of everything. Doesn't appreciate anything and refuses to take corrections. I never got love, care and protection from my father. I cnt date a man like my father, marriage is going to far

Anonymous said...

They taught you how to be INDEPENDENCE abi? Them no teach you how to be DEPENDENCE? Smh. Pls writing in caps is spoiling my eyes the more, na fight?

Anonymous said...

Adaora u r so lucky! My dad beats my mum!! And it's crazy!! I never want to marry sm1 like him.. not in this life. Sometimes I wish he wasn't my dad.

Chinma said...

I will Marry a man like my Dad any day and any tym. My mum once said to me"if u marry a man one fourth like ur dad,den ur blessed 4life. A man who has a heart of Gold,dots on his wife of 39yrs,5 kids and 5 amazig grandkids. Dad once said dt d key is Friendship,Patience,Communication and Understanding of ones role in a relationship/marriage. And physically my dad is just supper Hooot at 73yrs. Trust mi,a fathers love is like no other

Anonymous said...

I knw of a girlfriend who was so traumatized by her dad dat she vowed not to ever get married.

Anonymous said...

Linda, strange as it may sound, every day I pray and ask God not to let me marry a man like my father.
I hype him when am with my friends cos I don't want them to disrespect him but for me to marry a man like my father I would stay single

kike said...

Same here oooo!!! I bless God for answering that prayer in my life ooo...

Neither will any of my female children marry a man like my father!!!!!

hazel said...

This particular prayer has been a strong prayer point for me since I was abt 7.
My father was wealthy and a bloody womaniser. He lied about everything and was an absent father. I don't even know how many of us he has but I know we are not less than 15..yes 15 children.
My mum had to leave and that was when I was 6 years old. I can actually count how many times I saw my dad my entire life.
Well he's dead now and he didn't die well..he died broke and alone.

Anonymous said...

I dint marry a man lik my dad but i alwayz wishd i did bc he was al a woman wantd, d only isue he had was caryin his selfish siblings alwayz wit him until dey finaly destoyd nd kiled him.

Anonymous said...

Thank God I have d best Dad in d whole word.thanx my lovely dad for being my dad and may God give me a hubby like you.love you too a fault.Muaahh!

Anonymous said...

so linda u didn't post ma long epistle abi. dats ur problem u don't knw wat blogging is about, u don't knw most ppl come here cos dis is d only way they can really vent their hearts out. smh for you. mtchewwwwwww

Anonymous said...

I once told my dad that 'd never marry a man like him. He was so upset and said 'l never c a man half as gud as he is, den I said dat der, wat he just said is Y 'l never marry a man like him. My mum rebuked him sha. I don't hate him, he's just backward in his thots

Anonymous said...

I definitely won't marry a man like my dad. He is so selfish and self centered, never provides for the house. My mum saw me through school till i graduated....dad never added kobo to my school fees. Sometimes i understand he doesn't have that's why he doesn't provide but when he has sooo much, he spends it on himself at once and he's back to being broke. Money is not everything i know that, but the littlest of things; his love and support, we hardly get it. Very aggressive and selfish. But in the end,my mum loves him and her happiness is key so i have learnt to live with that and move on.

Anonymous said...

I agree 100percent. May I not marry a man like my father, bloody liar that just hates his kids as if he was forced to have them.

Unknown said...

Ladies only,alright!

Girlluchi said...

Pls tell them to also tutor u on how to write correct English.independence ko,democracy ni.

Anonymous said...

God 4bid me 2 marry a man lyk man father...d only tym u can enjoy I'm is wen u dnt ask of moni frm I'm.....buh once moni iz involve u'll regret eva askin frm hm.....d only tin I lyk abt I'm is dat he dosnt tolerate nonsense...even hz elder broda'z n yngr onez r afraid of I'm....

Gossipgalnsuk said...

Dts even if I no who d father is...tho I no I won't want to marry any man like him...any man dt can abandon his kid for 27 years is definitely not a good example or role model...

Anonymous said...

Amen

Anonymous said...

Not me oo,i wil neva marry a man like my father,infact am abt to leave my finance cos he shout and get angry just lik my dad,i prefer he is outside Dan home,once he get home he must see sumtin to nag abt,abeg am done wit him.

Anonymous said...

My dad never wanted me, rejected @birth. Mom took care of me.i grow up tried 2 reach out 2 him. D harder I tried d more he left, my married my stepdad who's been my rock for d past 13years. I used2 think I wasn't good enuf earlier now v changed. M 19yrs old and in my finals in a federal university in Nigeria. I stopped hating him,weneva we accidentally meet I greet him. But I really dnt want2 date or marry anyone like him

Angie said...

HBD to your hubby dear..

Anonymous said...

One thing I dnt like abt mi dad is dat he argues a lot, n am also like him. Aside dat, mi dad is superb. Pretex4luv@yahoo.com

Anonymous said...

@cherry mercy like seriously you need to go back to primary sch .owner of which blog you must have illiterates as visitors . There's also a blogger that seriously needs to go back to sch name starts with M it's not surprising she has little or no business. While I'm at it you Linda need to check ur write up to make sure it's ok before posting it's quite off putting !! .

Anonymous said...

Marrying someone like my dad would never happen, My Dad is cruel, hates his female children, treats them like day don't exist, and treat my mum like shit, i have never seen were a father hates his daughters so much, no atom of love @ all.

Anonymous said...

I definitely don't want to marry a man like my dad.. my dad is caring in his own way sha but... character wise, pride, anger, friendliness, strict-wise, stinginess, laziness.. bla bla bla... I don't want dese from my husband becos dese r d tins I've known my dad for.. so annoying...
My future hubby will definitely nt have dese characteristics..

Anonymous said...

May I not marry a man like my father already happened to me . My late dad was a mummy's boy infact him and his mum used to gang up to beat up my mum.listened and did everything his mum told him. My ex too was a wife puncher.

Anonymous said...

I see u didn't post my comment. I wonder why tho cause thts my truth

David said...

Linda, I have been thinking about eating dinner with you but didnt know how to go about it or mustered enough courage to.

We could have it at a fine public restaurant or my abode. I do not ulterior motives and I am a younger man.

This is the best appropriate way I think I can make my intentions known. I am sorry if it is not well composed

My Name: David
Email: latellisco@yahoo.com

Anonymous said...

Gbam..
May I never marry a man like my father, Amen. I married a man opposite to me father thank GOD. My hubby is one in a million. I’m so blessed and still can believe the wonderful man I ended up with.
This was always my wish since I was a teenager which I kept to myself and my dad used to always tease me that I would marry a man like him cause he was loving ( I always rebuked it from my life).
Don’t get me wrong I love my father die but his not always been the best at taking care of his family or standing up as a man to do what it takes to make sure we were always ok. His just there, no ambition or zest to achieve his best. His happy to do his 9 to 5 while my mother is slaving away doing 12 hour shifts mon to fri in UK hospitals (bank work). She complains all the time, I feel for her but she too should have shined eye.
I can’t remember him ever really giving me anything or doing anything that has impressed me in my teenage years to adulthood. His a bit self-fish and did not even bother to lecture my siblings or my husband on how they would provide for us or what they did for a living. For all he knew we were marrying in serial killers or illegal immigrants. As in, he pisses me off a lot but I just take it on the chin, his father and I can’t throw him away or get a new one, so ill manage.

Anonymous said...

I don't wanna marry a man like my father. He married 3 wives (no, he's not a Muslim) and couldn't take care of any of us. My step dad sponsored all my education. My father did nothing. God forbid I marry a man like him.

Anonymous said...

I certainly want a man like my father...he is down-to earth,deligent,observative and more...but one unique thing that inspires me about him is that, despite d fact that he travelled a lot,he was always giving this tender love,kept on with the intimacy through calls,texts,surprises and of cos daily chats!!! When I look @the both of them..I just know that nothingelse aside love keeps them!!!
I adore my father #blushing..and I sure could vouch for him anytime,anyday that my mum is his only!!!

Anonymous said...

Yes! Linda, you'll be surprised at the number of women out there who don't want a man like their dad. I am one of them. I used to say to my mom that I'd rather die single than marry my father's type and I meant every word! Fortunately, I am blessed and married to the best man a woman could ever dream of having as her husband today.

Anonymous said...

I pray I never end up with a man like my father,I'll rather be a nun in my lifetime!!! My mother suffered from the very beginning till she passed on 4 years ago.....keep resting with your Maker dearest Mum, till we meet to part no more!!!

Anonymous said...

May i never marry a man like my father, though i love him as my father bt not as husband.


he was too strict and very aggressive, he beat my mum, mad treat her and will not support her in taken care of us.

my mother went tru hell to train us financially and most time my father will have money and refused to give us.

there was nothing my mother did nt sell, from used newspaper to cola, her cloth to see us grow, despit all my father will still beat my mother and eat free food.

Anonymous said...

Nkechi Okoye@Uberstunner

Now Anonymous@uberbehavior with protected tweets.

I go tell your papa make she knack you koboko.

Nothing stays private on the internet; NOTHING!

Anonymous said...

I even found the father's pikicho on facebook. Lives in Abuja. Attended Queens College. Nwata bu tomato Jos.

Anyway she is expressing her frustration. May be the man na maradona

Peace out!

Anonymous said...

I AM OF THE SAME OPINION TOO. MAY I NOT EVEN DATE A MAN LIKE MY DAD NOT TO TALK OF MARRYING SOMEONE LIKE HIM. SO HELP ME GOD. AMEN.

Anonymous said...

i would not like to marry a man like my father. He is a nice man in most ways, a pastor in the church, cares for my mum and my siblings but in recent times there are things i have come to realize about him which have been quite upsetting. i found out he has been cheating on my mum and several other things so no i would not like to marry a man like my dad

Unknown said...

Hi Linda, I read ur blog but I've neva commented, this will be my first time. Yes I pray I neva marry a man like my father. I pray I neva meet a man like him sef. He left my mum and I wen I was just a child. He beat her and made her av a miscarriage before walking out on her. As I grew up, he didn't ask of me or even care about my existence. My mum died when I was 18, nd I was given my father's number b4 she died. I called him as I was in my final year then nd I needed money for projects nd My. Own father called me a 419ner that he doesn't have money to give anybody. He called me after. My NYSC to check on me, nd I asked him why called me a 419 when he knew I was the one. He said he knw my mum was dead but he wanted me to come look for him as that is the culture. To cut the long story short, my father is alive and well, he has refused to take responsilty. Of his child.I'm. 21 nd I've only spoken to my father on phone I've. Neva seen him, I don't knw w@ he looks like. You av no idea w@ not being wanted by your father does to a child psycholgically. There's always this feeling of rejectio, lack of trust in people, I'm his first child and he doesn't even wanna see me. I'm presently working now, even though its not where I wanna be, at least I'm ok nd my prayer is I never get to meet a. Man like my fathr. Men like that re meant to be shot in d face!

Unknown said...

I am with you all the way.

I don't want to marry a girl like Linda.

Anonymous said...

Well, I DO NOT PRAY TO MARRY A MAN LIKE MY FATHER! yes! thats how i feel,my fucking father married 3other women after my mom, few years after his death, one of his wives followed and the other two married someone else.see, all three of them waka after his death na only my mama stay.kinda happy he passed away sef,cuz who knows,he could have married more. Foolish boy!

Unknown said...

Do you mean you were smilling at your dad's funiral?

Most parent of the 80s and below where tough on their kids and even wife's. That alone is not enough to say that they are bad as the mentality then was to deal with "Iron Hand" if you understand.

My Dad was the same back then but I can't wish him bad. The training was well deserving at the time and we laugh over it now.

Never the less, thing have changed so I wouldn't imagine myself giving my kids that type of up bringing. I will rather give them all that I missed.

Anonymous said...

Amen,Me too,i will never marry a Man like my father,he was nasty till he died,he drained all d confidence in me,im trying to gain my confidence back, I'm a 27yr old lady,i didn't miss my dad @ all and always thank God he's dead now! ......My enemy will never marry such Man, my mum cried everyday when we were growing up, she neva enjoyed her life with him....But we are better now! thank God!

Anonymous said...

I am one of those women. And don't get me wrong, I do love my dad a lot and he isn't a bad man at all. However, there are some traits he has that isn't very nice. He could be extremely stubborn, could get upset by the slightest change, hates to see the point of view of others, believes that he is always right, thinks that his dreams are more important than his kids dreams...He doesn't want us to be our own person but the person that he wants us to be and sometimes he takes the side of his extended family rather than his nuclear. A lot of these things are things that I won't want to see in a man that I marry.

judkin said...

I'm sorry Onyx, about your experience with your abusive Dad... must have been a tough one for your family...

Anonymous said...

Many people don't want the kind of husband their father was, but that doesn't imply he wasn't enough of a man or husband, infact its not like he is imperfect or has done something wrong. Most fathers have lost touch with today's reality and they are the best husbands some of our mothers could wish for because they are all what they wanted in a man. AM sure every woman today want more than our mothers, so we cant settle for someone like our fathers. Our fathers are mostly traditional,, domineering and big disciplinarians, no nonsense fathers, whom our mothers preferred. They make decisions for the family cuz they were the protector of the family. Today women and men engage in role sharing and this might be why we don't want a man like our fathers. Another reason could be that education and exposure has shown us that we deserve better and can demand for better, but we know certainly well, not from our fathers. I love my father and I couldn't have prayed for better. I want someone better but it doesn't mean if that's what I get, I cant have it!

Ug said...

Wow! My dad is a God-fearing man,prayerful,loving,caring and all good things u can think of a dad. but doesn't really have much money,been in and out of business .its been my mum taking care of things. though, he is supportive when he has. So I will say,i can marry a man like my dad but d man will b rich unlike my dad. I love my dad much cos' I know if he had plenty he will lavish it on us

Anonymous said...

oyar...dey come my village. Big hug to u

Unknown said...

D man no go nice b dat na ...


C.E.O

Anonymous said...

My dad is lovely to his kids but God forbid him as a husband. My parents hv been 2geda 4 close 2 40 yrs but smtyms i wonder if my mum stays bcos of d money

Ug said...

My dad is tall and handsome, loving,God fearing,prayerful,faithful to my mum and all good things u can think of a lovely dad but no money*winks* .excluding the no money virtue, I will marry a man like my dad but he has to be comfortable.

Anonymous said...

May my daughters never the type of their dad. He is a liar, he will not provide for us, and he wants me to loose my job at all cost despite the fact that he is not providing the family needs. Women please teach your sons the right way of life, and not lies

Ug said...

My dad is tall and handsome, loving,God fearing,prayerful,faithful to my mum and all good things u can think of a lovely dad but no money*winks* .excluding the no money virtue, I will marry a man like my dad but he has to be comfortable.

Anonymous said...

Unfortunately for me, I ended up a man like my father. It's a miserable life.

DOBY DOBY said...

Hahaha. .u jus crackd my ribs. Lmao@ wen u cal u av to introduce urself

Anonymous said...

In the whole of nigeria i have always tot my dad was worse.God forgive me if my mum and dad were still together i would have killed my dad with my hands, my dad told my mum not to have more than two kids,that he cant take care of more than two, we are just two my dad has never ever been dere for us till date...just recently we found out my dad is an occultic man, even his own brothers cant talk to him, dere was a time i was sick my dad told my mum dis child will die. now i want to get married he cant and will never give me out in marriage the man said noting good will come out of me and my brother but my mum with prayers trained us well my bro is in d states and today doing well am also doing great thank God for prayers and constant followup from my mum God bless her, i will never marry a man from my fathers state not to talk of a demon like my dad cant wait to do away with his name, funny enuf his mother is a known witch who was chased away from the village.my fada was eating beans one day that he did not bring money for the beans or gas used to cook d food, do u kw wat he did wen he matched stone in the beans he poured it in my brothers food mixed it and asked d poor boy to eat it...if not for d grace of God my brother for kill am.wicked soul of a fada

DOBY DOBY said...

Soo painful. . God wil strengthen you

Unknown said...

ME FOR ONE..THIS IS MY EVERYDAY PRAYER.

Anonymous said...

Adaora am 27 n av lost count of how many times my dad beats ma mom. I pray not to marry a man lik ma dad too. Buh I met a guy I fell so deeply in love with and now he has some things ma dad do. He keeps talking abt the past,he doesn't let go of the past n he's always shouting at mi. Am so sad I don't know what to do cuz we have a son together.

Anonymous said...

Hahaha. .lol. This is funny but I can understand jhor.

Anonymous said...

Hi linda good job this is ma first time writing pls approve. I neva want to marry a man lik my dad,he beats my mom anytime n he's neva sorry. He's always right and he practically lives in the past. I met a guy am in love with And we have a son together but he has some of my dad's bad habits, he's always talking abt the past too n he has beaten me before too tho he said sorry But am scared cuz I always said I don't want to marry a man lik my dad. This has been making me so so sad, I love him and we have a son buh I don't knw what to do. Approve my comment ooooo

Anonymous said...

Much better, I see you"ve covered her name BUT guess what ? Loads of people have seen it, rather too late.... make we dey use common sense at times oo.

Anyway, you don't want someone like your parents doesn't mean they did you dirty or you hate them or anything like that. You could even love them to death but not want to marry someone like them. So stop making a fuss about anything. There's something called preference you know.

Anonymous said...

Na Ur type pple dey complain of just read Ur comment again useless man

Anonymous said...

My dad ws a nice man bt he 'loved' many women...so I wouldn't want a man like him

Unknown said...

Me too, I don't like DoroLinda, but I love her set of teeth. lolz ⌣̊┈̥-̶̯͡»̶̥♡thanks ⌣̊┈̥-̶̯͡»̶̥ 

Unknown said...

Me too, I don't like DoroLinda, but I love her set of teeth. lolz ⌣̊┈̥-̶̯͡»̶̥♡thanks ⌣̊┈̥-̶̯͡»̶̥ 

Anonymous said...

Your own experience scrobo! Talk about your own dad

MY TURN said...

@ONYX GOWDIN THEY CRIED TEARS OF RELIEF

Anonymous said...

There's good and bad in everyone. That being said, i married a man that has the good side of my dad. He is loving, God fearing, helps my mom with chores, etc.

Anonymous said...

I love my dad than i can imagine. Why wont i pray for a man like him.

Anonymous said...

My father is from a polygamous home and is not romantic or sensitive to my mother's feelings. He talks to my siblings and i like we're grown men and doesn't realise it's okay to pet your wife and kids sometimes. I don't want such a husband!

Unknown said...

OH WELL....mba...i love my dad but his kind of man is most definitely not what i want...he is excessively old fashioned, doesnt lift even a pinky in housework...doesnt show his wife as much respect as i would want from my husband....

Anonymous said...

Thats Awful

Unknown said...

Wow so many ladies talking ill of their parents here.Is that right? God says we should respect the head of the family, if not your prayers could be hindered. Be careful how you talk about your dads, no matter the wrongs you see in them.

Anonymous said...

Thats Awful

Anonymous said...

the only reason why i don't pray to marry someone like my father is cos he's a polygamist

APPLE said...

My dad was the greatest while he was alive. R.I.P daddy.

JOYCHY said...

@Bonario so if its a woman's duty 2 keep d home, shld it also be d man's duty 2 scatter d home?? Its takes a Man/woman 2 build a happy home. Its high tyme Men Understand dis. #Una headache too plenty.

Mena Peters Triflections said...

Sorry about your experience Onyx! Same for me, if you marry my type of dad, just get ready for suffering and abuse all the days of your life.

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