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Friday 2 May 2014

Dear LIB readers: Should I divorce my husband to be with a married man?

From a female LIB reader
Dear Linda Ikeji beautiful readers, please I need your urgent help. I am in my mid thirty's with a child and I have been unhappily married for 5years. I think I am in love with another married man. He makes me happy and will not hit me like my husband does. The man I am presently in love with is planing on divorcing his wife only if I will agree to divorce my husband. I am in love with this man, he does things for me that my so called husband will not. Should I divorce my husband? I am so confused that I don't know what to do. Please LIB readers should advice me. Please no insults, if you have truly been in love and found love you will know what I mean.

271 comments:

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Anonymous said...

If marring him was a mistake. U can still correct it now. Spend d rest of ur life with whom ur hrt truly loves.

Anonymous said...

Big Amen ooooooooooooo.

Anonymous said...

Nigeria women of these days are doomed, not like original African queens.... In the days of our mums. Why should men marry these days to women like this, no moral, no substance , no elegance . A wife should be the husbands helper, behind any successful man there is a woman. Satan has visited Nigerian women even in church, home tv, celebrity life style and now they are lost in lust without any brain to think for themselves .... Because u r beautiful or fair or you have swallowed AIdS/cancer tablets to be fair , now all sorts of men are promising heaven and earth, only a fool will continue in this disruptive path.

Anonymous said...

LET HIM DIVORCE FIRST B4 YOU TRY ANYTHING O. HM, BYE!

Anonymous said...

If u steal another woman's happiness is what it, because it makes u happy, then if u r unhappy later, would start sleeping with another man because it makes u happy? A relative of mine , did something similar until he got AIDS and passed it to the wife and who was there for him at the end of his life? The woman he was about to leave

Anonymous said...

U r selfish and what less person, u can't always do things because it makes u happy at the short term and not at the long term, do not put a sounder

Anonymous said...

Think about the Sin your committing, and the Sin your leading the man into too.

Anonymous said...

Leaky, is your type destroying homes and the nation, if she destroys her life through your advice, it will be on your head. Do not put a sounder lekki

Anonymous said...

U look down on your husband and the only bad thing your husband has done is to beat you up........ What do you do to get the beating? You promote another woman's husband . You type is a shame to the current Bigeria woman and wife. U are a cheater and so the married man, you too cheaters can never work .

Anonymous said...

Marriage is not just for good times only

Anonymous said...

Divorce your husband because he does not make you happy and not because of the guy you think you are in love with.

Anonymous said...

Which Ada Bekee, ur type is a disgrace to married women and things don't work out for good for your type

Anonymous said...

Yes I been in love to a woman of your type, they destroy life's , u dug ur grave and u should lay in it thhen

Ifenkie said...

I understand u perfectly well my dear and I advice u pray n give in ur best for ur marriage to work atleast for the sake of ur child n the sanctity of marriage. i know it's not easy but as a christian, I don't advocate divorce except the situation is life threatening. So my dear pray sincerely about ur marital issues n God will rekindle d love btwn u n ur spouse n perfect ur marriage. Best wishes to u 3 (u, hubby n ur lil angel).

APPLE said...

Please don't divorce your husband, you are feeling this way now because the two of you are stealing from your partners! If you divorce him you will later regret it. It is the dick that is turning your head! BLOODY CHEATER!!!

Anonymous said...

Nigerians can be so backward and foolish with their stupid sentiments; dear poster I understand that happiness is very important! Am sure you know that dating a married man is wrong; am sure you have asked yourself severally if you are doing the right thing but it could be so difficult if these married man makes you happy. Divorcing your hubby on grounds that he no longer makes you happy and beat you is acceptable; marriage is not a do or die don't even try to patch it up it is not always worth it if he beats you then what is the point? But do not leave because your lover asked you to divorce him after all he is also a man! Don't let anyman use you

APPLE said...

It is your cheating ways that is making your husband treat you any how. That other man will even be scared to marry you because he will say to him self, this woman will also cheat on me like she cheated on her ex husband. Madam you are a WHORE!

Anonymous said...

Gbammest!!

Anonymous said...

You can not value what you have on till you lose it .remain there and pray it over God is every where .

BODY CHEMISTRY said...

You are not happy in your marriage and you went ahead to taste another woman's husband. Now he said he will divorce his wife to take you just because maybe you have be giving him what his wife starved him of. You should have bring this topic up before you enter into it but now you are there already. Why don't you please your man the way you do for this your concubine? I will suggest you don't take the step you mentioned because the man will also leave you for another woman soonest and let me also ask, will you be able to cope in polygamous family? I wish you the best.

Unknown said...

Yoruba will say oloshi buruku why on earth do u think you will be happy with the other man stop deceiving your self you already lost if you don't trace ur steps bk to ur real husband if you are loyal to ur HB he will love u like any other just be patience, CUNT and pray for the best

niffyt said...

My dear. Don't try it. You will really regret it. Am pretty sure your hubby did more than what this present guy did when u were dating. My advice for u is to look back on what u may have done wrong, correct urself, Prayerfully ask God to help you concerning your husband cos u cannot change a person, a grown man at that. So darling I hope u sort this mess out fast. Believe me that married man isn't worth shit

Anonymous said...

With all respect linda I neva knew u just post every message pipo send to u. I respect u a lot dat I beliv evrytin I read here on ur blog,but ryt now some of diz stories I read here gets me angry,coz dey are obviously lies. Plz itz not every message pipo send to u,u should put up in ur blog. Like diz very 1 So dumb....

Anonymous said...

Goat,divorce him if u like. Y ar u disturbing us? U hav scattered ur home n u want to extend it to another home. It won't work for u.

Anonymous said...

Sensible response

Anonymous said...

my
dear
pls
read
matt5:32
and
matt19
ur
soul
is
more
important
than
that
man

Walata said...

Hey I am not in support of divorce but bear it in mind dat there's no relationship which is perfect so even if u divorce this ur current hubby n opt for the man u r in luv with now, make sure u won't have a beef along the line cos r/ships r meant to have issues but it's hw u resolve n bounce back makes it worthwhile

Anonymous said...

I can see why your present husband pummels you. You're light headed, heartless, cheap and a cheat. I can assure you that your husband will be a better man without you. First of all, you're already cheating while being married. 2) You do not mind at all ruining some other woman's marriage, home and life because you want her husband and 3) You chose to come to LIB to annoy us responsible readers with your stupidity. I assure you that if eventually, you marry this other man, you'll have the worst time of your life. You never see beating. He will never trust you because he will always bear to heart how you were cheating on you ex husband with him and that will be the beginning of other numerous woes that will follow such humiliation etc. One man tell you say him go leave im wife, story! Nah today?
Linda, nah beg I beg you. In ad much ad you love to entertain us your faithful, biko spare us stories of anofias like this. Cheers

Lagos Lawyer said...

I would gladly advise you to leave your husband because he hits you, not because of the married man you 'allege' you are in love with. REALITY CHECK: 95% of married men will NEVER leave their wife unless they catch her in flagrant delicto in adultery. Ask the man why he says he will divorce his wife. If it's not a case of open adultery on the woman's part, then he's probably bullshitting you. Shine your eye madam. Good luck

Unknown said...

Fact- Men tend to enjoy a woman on the side more cos there isn't much pressure on them to be there everyday for them and distance/abscence kinda makes the heart grow fonder. By that I mean the case might be different once he see you're all about him.Be wise!

ify said...

if ur husband beats u, u don't need him to divorce his wife before u run for ur dear life abeg. u can stay alone while u figure things out. this is not a game of back up marriage biko

Anonymous said...

you are not happy in your current relationship. Whether you end up with this married man or not it would be worth it leaving an unhappy relationship regardless. Yes the married man might be lying but what have you got to lose? you dont love your husband anymore so check out and hopefully if you dont end up with your married guy you will meet someone who will truly make you happy.

Goodluck

Pumpkin

Anonymous said...

Wait for him to divorce dis wife first.

Anonymous said...

If your lover is a real man let him make the first move. He should divorce first because it takes women longer to sort out things do our emotions. If your spouse is beating you, remember safety is first. Regardless, of having a lover you don't deserve to be hit by anyone.

Anonymous said...

U wnt us 2 feel sorry 4 u dat ur husband beats u, Or u wnt 2 justify d fact dat u wnt 2 mak urslf a home breaker all in a bid of ur selfish pursuit of hapines. I feel u need 2 work on urslf first. U need 2 stop nd avoid dose fings dat causes quarrel dat will mak ur husband beat u.. Abi ur husband na craze man wey go jst c u den 2 beat am go bgin hungry am?... Work on ur character, behaviour nd persnality. Stop finkin of stealing husband...

Unknown said...

Hmmmmm do let your husband knw why u leaving him...would u hv taken it if twas you?

Anonymous said...

If your new boyfriend was done with his marriage, he wouldn't need you to divorce your husband before he makes a decision. He still wants to be in his marriage, so you should stay out of it. Leave your husband if you want to, not because you want to run off with a new man.

Unknown said...

BE Carefull

Anonymous said...

Dont divorce him! God hate divorce. Adultery is a sin against God. I feel u bt God who established this marriage institutn will help u put ur home in order. Pray 4 ur marriage cos ur enemy is not dat man bt d'enemy of marriage is d'devil.shallom.

Janelicious said...

Super story

Dianna Kat said...

My husband has abandon me and the kids for the the past 8months now, and refuse to come back because he was hold on by a woman whom he just met, for that, my self and the kids has been suffering and it has been heel of a struggle, but I decide to do all means to make sure that my family come together as it use to, then I went online there I saw so many good talk about this spell caster whose email is onimalovespell@gmail.com so I had to contact him and explain my problem to him and in just 3days as he has promised, my husband came home and his behavior was back to the man i got married to. I cant thank the spell caster enough for what he did for me, i am so grateful and i will never stop to publish his name on the internet for the good work he has done for me,once again his email is onimalovespell@gmail.com

Anonymous said...

U won't understand if u re not married.

Anonymous said...

Soo your saying that the lady would live to regret abandoning a violent relationship? That's bull

nsi...CAN said...

U don't need "advice"..u need the "wool of deception" to be blown off ur eyes..#

Anonymous said...

You guys commenting on here surprise me. Y'all seem to handle this issue if domestic violence soo lightly, but I'm not even too shocked at your mind set because your living in nigeria where management of suffering is all you guys sleep and wake up to. I do not condone infidelity and would advise that she leaves her husband regardless since he seems to exhibit no atom of remorse for his actions.

nsi...CAN said...

Lol..@ "bingo"...I tot only married men cheat..so Married women do worse##as for dis 16-yr-old-brain-in-a-36yr-old-body, I am a freelance councellor..lemme help u..here is my contact...youbemumu@yahoo.com#

Anonymous said...

My dear please ask yourself this question. How would I feel if I am the one thrown out by my husband just cos he wants to marry another woman?

Anonymous said...

i know your pain, but the issue is two wrongs don't make a right . Your story suggests you are currently dating this married man i suggest you take a break from him and clarify issues with your husband , because it might be the only reason you're thinking of divorce is this other man.
if things are irreconcilable, then do what you must do. but do them for yourself not for another because men are angels today, and demons tomorrow.
Secondly, this man might be doing what your husband is doing to you to his own wife and trust me you don't want God hold you responsible. Don't let your case be a from frying pan to fire to situation.

Anonymous said...

try and make your marriage work.you cannot leave your husband and take someones husband ...that is madness...make your marriage work ..nobody is perfect ;even the guy you want is not perfect and will never be perfect...talk to your husband and make your marriage work at least for the sake of your child

Anonymous said...

My dear nobody will understand unless that person is in your shoes. I should say I understand coz I'm in a similar situation. It takes the grace of God to find a way out.it's a big mess I understand. Just follow your heart at the same time do the right thing. I need some advice myself but I need God's grace more.

Anonymous said...

La Casa da Aldo (behind closed doors) telemundo things. Don't face your marriage you hear? . Ishi

Unknown said...

my dear, am a guy and i wud tell u not to try such silly mistake. Why in heaven's name wud u think ur married new lover wud divorce his wife simply to b e with u? please wake up and go make amends with ur husband or better still, separate from ur husband for the time being to enable him get level headed

Anonymous said...

What makes u feel that this new Mr sugar has no imperfection, babe this things manifest with time. If he's so perfect and nice why would he wanna leave his wife, no even if he leaves his wife for u he might turn around to leave u 2 wen he's tired of u. He's bin Mr. nice guy bcos ur another man's wife. Its your choice tho look carefully before you leap from d frying pan to hell fire

Anonymous said...

Is better to seek 4 God advice than people advice. God hate divorce.

Anonymous said...

My dear I understand coz I'm in a similar situation. Just follow your heart but do the right thing. Most importantly, ask for God's grace. You feel the pinch of your situation. But remember, no woman beater is worth it. You are a precious gift. Love yourself. Stay alive for those who value and need you.

ZeeZee said...

He is luring you, the sway your currently abusive husband lured you - did you ever know you would one day be in an unhappy marriage, pray and always try to be happy it will confuse the man that after all h does you are happy.
Don't even try it - marriage is sacred, the way people think the grass is greener on the otherside that thing is fake - na screensaver... shit is real no matter what side you are on

Mi Lady said...

Prayer lo need Oº°˚°º ....no divorce anybody.. If you can go this extra mile I want you to see this man of God at Voice of God Power Ministry,Ago 40,folly block area,Aboru,Iyana-Ipaja,Lagos...God used him to help me and my whole family.

Anonymous said...

Dnt u dare leave ur husband! U wana leave something old for d possibility of something new??? 2 tink hez also a married man. Seek d lord and keep praying for ur marriage!

LIVING GROUND GOSPEL MINISTRY said...

U sure need 2 book a space @ Nite of a Thousand laffs - u ar really funny

Anonymous said...

Hian madam,take am easy now.Abi wetin sef.Na ur husband they toast me o...he say ur toto always smell like dead lizard.I no want ur thunder to fire my bombom,so I go just move ahead with my rose smelling toto.So pls wash that ur stinky toto well.mtschew.

Unknown said...

Eventhou i dont support guys hitting their wives but how on earth do u think dis guy ll leave his wife fpr u..oyo o

Anonymous said...

woman...just think of it... u feel ur husband is no more the best for you...dont forget that his wife too will be feeling he his no longer good for her... he wants to divorce his wife and wants you to divorce ur husband... what is the guarantee that one day he will not become worse than your present husband... but seriously are u even insane? that means you are already cheating on your husband and then u want love... i pray ur husband finds out... and i pray he beats you blue black... you are just a disgrace.

BEY! said...

@anon 7:24pm her husband is aware that is why he is hitting her? does that make any sense to you? you were making a valid point from de beginning until you messed it up with that last one there.. read the story again and see if that makes sense!

Anonymous said...

Madam ur hubby is the devil u know which is better than the angel the other man u don't know

Anonymous said...

...LOL...this your case dey make me laugh.U need help aunty.


OLUWÆßÖßßÝ

Anonymous said...

...LOL...this your case dey make me laugh.U need help aunty.


OLUWÆßÖßßÝ

Anonymous said...

Ashawo 10kobo...Akuna! so you think he will leave her for you! What have you achieved in life?? You are lying about your story! It's totally incomplete. You have bn cheating from the get go and even with others before your new married man. But you are a cheap gal with no common sense. Eni to Lori Ko ni fila. Divorce penre you go become like your senior. Why can't you be patient if he is not as comfortable now he will be in the next 10yrs. There are loads of women that helped their husband up the ladder. Do you think he doesn't know you are cheating?? Prostitute!!! You better plead with your hubby now that he is still willing to take your sorry ass. why in God's name are women just destroying the marital scene. Is it a playground? Ain't your parents still together? Pls keep sleeping with all the men in Nigeria they will constantly use and dump you. This Story is very very REAL and TRUE!! The P-meter is reading........

Anonymous said...

E beh re. Question!!!

Anonymous said...

the married man you are cheating on your husband with, will also accuse you of cheating on him when you are with him. he won't trust you and will suspect every move you make because he knows you cheated on your husband with him, so what assurance does he have that you wouldn't cheat on him with someone else? secondly, how do you know he wouldn't cheat on you with someone else just as he cheated on his wife with you? third, i'm sure he once showed his wife the kind of affection he is showing you now. what makes you think that 5 years from now, he wouldn't be leaving you for another woman? please use your head. if you have to get a divorce, look for a single man, or a divorcee or widower. don't destroy someone else' happiness. to be honest, i had to stop myself from insulting you because you asked a very stupid question

Anonymous said...

My husband broke up with me a month ago because of the little misunderstanding will had, he was dating other young lady and he never take me out again he was totally changed and he never listen to any thing i told him. one day he came and told me he is bringing in other lady in our home, i was so frustrated so when i came across Dr.airiohuodion (airiohuodiontemple@gmail.com) how he use to rebuild broken home and make their family to reunite together again, so i quickly email him and explain all my problem to him and he guarantee me that my husband will definable want me back after the reunite spell. After everything my husband (SAM) came back to tell me he still love and cherish me that he promise never to cheat on me any more i was so happy and i quickly email Dr.airiohuodion (airiohuodiontemple@gmail.com) and thank him for the wonderful spell, he was God sent and if you need his helping hand contact his direct email at.(airiohuodiontemple@gmail.com).

Anonymous said...


i am caston by name. Greetings to every one that is reading this testimony. I have been rejected by my husband after six(6) years of marriage just because another woman had a spell on him and he left me and the kid to suffer. one day when I was reading through the web, I saw a post on how this spell caster on this have help a woman to get back her husband and I gave him a reply to his address and he told me that a woman had a spell on my husband and he told me that he will help me and after 3 days that I will have my husband back. I believed him and today I am glad to let you all know that this spell caster have the power to bring lovers back. because I am now happy with my husband. Thanks for His great work here is email:lordmazitemple@yahoo.com

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