So yesterday I had an appointment at Ogunlana Drive, which isn't very far from my office...not necessarily near either. I decided to walk there because I was in the mood to walk...ok sincerely...my car was messing up...so...(don't you just hate that?)
So here I was, above the knee figure hugging dress, cleavage in display, long curly hair (horse hair..wink!), 2 inches high heel, my signature walk...plus that pretty face? Please, men find that hard to resist...lol.
Most times when I'm walking, I get approached by men...I don't know about other women, but within 10 seconds of sighting a guy, I know whether I want to talk to them or not. If I don't want to talk to them, I find a way to get rid of them ASAP.
In the past I used to simply say "I'm not interested in talking to you", but they want to talk to you, so imagine the dilemma. Once, when I was a real biatch (I once was), I'll ask them if they think I'm in the same class with them..."Am I your mate?" I used to ask, and sometimes I won't say a word to them. They'll talk for like 20 minutes and I'll ignore them until they get tired or pissed off and leave. But some heady men don't walk away when you ignore them, instead they walk in silence with you, until when you can't take it anymore and you become very nasty.
Sometimes when the silent treatment doesn't work, I flag down a taxi and leave the scene, when I can't do that, I walk into a supermarket, a restaurant etc just to get rid of them.
Some men are so annoying in their manner of approach, their looks even turn you off, or maybe its the first word that come out of their mouth, sometimes it's the bad English or annoying accent...you just don't want to hear another word.
Some of them have wedding rings on their fingers and they are asking for your number? Those ones I totally ignore...pure waste of time!
So for several years, I kept coming up with several ways to get rid of these guys. Three years ago, I came up with "I have a boyfriend!". That didn't work. Some of these men don't care. That doesn't fizzle them.
Two years ago, I came up with "I'm engaged", that worked for a while, but after sometime, these guys wizened up. They look at your finger, no ring, they either don't believe you or don't want to know...they keep bugging till you almost tear the hair from your scalp.
So last year, I came up with the fastest way to get rid of unwanted attention. I started saying " I'm married". Oh that worked...thank God...immediately you say that they apologise and leave...oh it really did work...UNTIL yesterday.
I told a guy yesterday "I'm married!", he said "So?"
So? Like, is this guy shitting me or what? A women tells you she's married(Whether it's true or not) and you say so? Then he says "I have married girlfriends...can I have your number? Call you sometime?"
This guy is about to see another side of me...mennn!lol. I acted like a real married woman and gave him a piece of my mind...oh men..I turned on my bitchy attitude...it wasn't even funny!
I was so disillusioned because now I know that the 'I'm married' bit won't always work. So annoying!lol
Anyone have any suggestions on how to get rid of these annoying guys in less than 20 seconds? Oh, by the way, the 'I have AIDS' doesn't work either...tried that once and the guy said..."oh, I'll take care of you" not even funny!
Anyone feeling me on this? Similar experiences? What do you do in a situation like that?
Tell us something.
Naija news and gossip coming tomorrow. Cheers!
23 comments:
LOL, funny I must say..When I was in Naija, I normally made comments stating my BF was in the other bluiding or in the other car...something to show he was around somewhere...Once I pointed to a tall black mean looking guy a far off in a club, and this toaster said, "Ah, you mean James, thats my brother....how come I havnt seen you around"..I just said...Nah, not him...the one behind him! LOL....
lol... yeah some of the men in naija are something else, its almost comical the way they try to holla at you and how aggressive they can be like they don't quite grab the concept of being turned down. Maybe they think you are playing hard to get, I for one dont get it, if I tell you to go away, I mean just that, anyhoo you are not alone on that one. I took mine as far as saying I have a very violent boyfriend.. hehe that dint work on most... men can be weird sometimes. anyhoo, off to bed!. Gnite!
you know in nigeria one thing that always amazes me is that any man will come up to a woman anytime to talk to her......like any man o! from the okada rider to the CEO, for some reason naija men just feel like "yes, i'm a man and i want you so....?"
the most effective reaction i've given was when after saying no firmly a few times, i turn to the guy head on and said very loudly so everyone could hear, "look at me very well, I don't know you and I'm not coming with you, LEAVE ME ALONE, I DON"T KNOW YOU OH I DON"T KNOW YOU!" lol..........i think the guy got both scared and embarassed at the same time! it worked sha....
Hi Linda,
I just started reading your blogg only last week and i check it any day i'm @ work.
You are really a real person and descent too.
All the best.
'My preference is women' tends to work for my sis, not sure if that will go down well in nija though. In defence of guys, you girls seem to always send out mixed messages and that leaves guys seriously confused, I cannot recount how many times some of my past relationships started with a 'No, I'm not interested' then a little bit of toasting, wine/dine/gifts, and voila! bob's your uncle. Then again, you approach someone, they say no and there no means no, which is fair enough, but for a guy the difficulty is knowing first hand when a no really means no.
My personal advice is be persistent in the nicest possible way, better saying i'm in a committed relationship rather than saying no, I be your mate?
Pete
I usually tell men i have a girlfriend.................. d look of disgust of their face is priceless. Tho a couple of them go on to ask if they could join us for a 3some..... eek
Oh my Gosh! Linda are u saying that some crack head M..fker still wanna have a little bit of u after telling him point blank..I HAVE AIDS?:))))LOL!!!! Geez!!!! Ok, tell the next one ..Am married to General Buka Zuka Dagash DanSokoto!maybe that will deter him...:))))
Honestly linda this annoying epidemic has no cure! I live in chicago and the men here are the exact same! One time I lied and said I was a lesbian but that just turned him on even more! Most men don't care what u say they still want you! I always ignore them no matter how much they seem to plead!
The truth is the one you want, the person you are dying for will not give you the time of day
It is guys you dont want that will keep coming
Linda think of the one guy you desire real bad right now...and imagine if it would ever be possible for him to walk up to you and start toasting withouht you loading him up with 'oya come now' signals
i'm first?
cool!!!!!!!
babe!!!!i feel u
some guys are just nuts
nothing u say or do will let them leave u alone
serves u right for being so HOT
only remedy i subscribe to is the silent treatment
being nasty wont solve it
moreover u getting angry is too much credit for the "pest"
i dont care how patient he is
his ego will eventually be deflated if he is ignored long enough
getting out of his immediate area is also cool
being bitchy doesnt cut it
improve on ur silent skill
it works......cos u will hit where it hurts a man the most
his ego
i always know within the first few mins of sighting a guy if i wanna speak with him/shag him
his first sentence will make or mar him
"wink"
Ummmh, advice for you Linda...maybe you can stop trekking to avoid all those over-zealous toasters! I dont think any amount of excuses will stop Naija men from trying to put you on the line.
u knw smetimes a line might work, and at other times...it might not
theres just no tellin wat works for who....i usually use my most snotyy look along with the 'i'm married' line.i hv an 80% success rate
Hiya! hehehe:))))) You girlz are very interesting ooo..it all boils down to...what are u girlz gonna do without us? we need each other girlz! una no fit eradicate men pestering and persistency...pls,don't tell me CAPITAL NO for an answer.. if u be Lesbian i go still follow u..infact, Lesbians are sweet and lovely:)))if u be straight u are all mine! i fine pass Denzel Wasghinton!
hi Linda,I feel u on this topic.I 4 1,when i was in naija was a 'V.O.S.',it was really though for me.like i'm not the going -out type,(my mom is the strict type,i only go out when i go to sch,morning and coming back home in d evening).so,while i was growing 16/17 it was real hell and it was my mom will have to send me out to get something for her and since i wasnt the going out type since i was child(no going out to play in the nxt neighbourhood,u understan),i was spotless and i have this half-caste complex(which now doesnt exist anymore),so every now and then,i will have at 1 to abt 5 guys dat will walk me to where i'm going and another that will walk be back,wanting something from me and i agree wth u abt theie approaches or something they will say that will put u off(like sister),that really made me mad,i will say?who is ur sister...',though at the end i found a guy who i'm in love wth for 7yrs among them but wth him,it took 9months,bcos i will tell him alot of lies,'i have a boyfriend and so many lies but for the Naija Guy that he is ,he was a die hard.after i agreed wth him,they will still come no matter who u are staying wth,they will still stay'sista ,can i have a word wth u and so on',it was really crazy.1 day i slapped a guy who in turn kicked me at my lower tommy,it was really annoying ...
ciao LInda!!!
"I am married" doesn't work as much as "I have a girlfriend"! lol...
Just tell them, u're gay and they'll pick race like Asafa Powell.
Dear Linda,
This one should work, tell them about JESUS. Ask them if they know Him, ofcourse they will start by saying yes or try to change the topic. Step it up by quoting some scripture, they will take off. Nice way to win souls by the way and a sure way to get them off your back.
Well I.m coming from work , alighted from the staff bus, was in jeans and Top , so don't look like a worker but a student.
This guy comes up the usual stuf with terrible Grammar, so i said I ma married and he was like you would have said so, but i will still like to be your friend, shuo , small boy like you wan become friend to a married woman, to make matters worse , the guy is obviously young so i told him to go and work on his admission into the UNiverssity,
Another incident I told the guy I am born again. ( I am really ) and he goes I am born again too. Wow!!! You are and you go about toasting people on the road, what a way to share his GOspel and he still tried to convince me he has done nothing wrong . I dont know what next to say.
Dont know what line to use next maybe like Gucci said , I have a girlfriend na wa for that one.
That post was funny
"Oh by the way - I have aids." LOL!! Not sure that will work wonders but would love to see the expressions on their faces when they hear that.
LOL. Girl, i feel you on this oo. I'm married for real and many people still don't give a damn when they see my fully loaded wedding finger. One guy even said to me after i'd rebuffed him & flashed my wedding finger at him, who told you i wanted to toast you?! How did you know i wasn't going to preach the word to you?! ROTFLMAO!!! Na wa oo. Guys would come up with ANTHING just to get some "you know what"...
They never stop, do they? Lol! Nice one...xxx
what can we do without them? and what can they do without us? so , lyn baby, keep flaunting wat you gat and let the head keep rolling.
nice one.
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