Popular US blogger Necole Bitchie quits blogging - read her emotional goodbye message | Welcome to Linda Ikeji's Blog

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Friday, 3 July 2015

Popular US blogger Necole Bitchie quits blogging - read her emotional goodbye message

Popular US blogger Necole Bitchie has quit blogging after 7 years of doing it. She took to her website yesterday to announce the sad news. What she wrote below...
"This is probably the most difficult thing I’ve ever had to do…And I will cry after I write this. I’m am very sadden to announce that today is my last day as a ‘celebrity gossip blogger.’ It’s also my last day running the site as you know it, NecoleBitchie.com.
Back in 2008, while people were celebrating the New Year with their loved ones, I was on the phone with my good friend Lamar (most of you know him as ‘Blogxilla’) and I told him my plans for growing the traffic on this tiny blog I had just started. I researched HTML codes for hours in an attempt to create a readable layout with red, black and white colors, and he offered to help me with a header image. Although I was living with my aunt at the time, I was somewhat homeless and reminded every day that if I didn’t get a real job soon, I’d have to find somewhere else to go.

Over the next six months, I found myself hopping from couch to couch as I moved to Atlanta, and worked hard to grow my following. My friend Lauren tells the story of one day waking up to me laying on her floor with my head resting on my computer. I had fell asleep while blogging!!!!! And that was the reality of my life at the time, I couldn’t really afford to log off my computer, unless it was to attend an event. I refused to send out any more resumes and work at a job I hated.  Plan B? Forget about it, this was my only option, and I had to make it work.

My breakthrough finally came when Munson Steed of Rolling Out invited me to speak on the Female Success Factor tour, alongside Chilli. It was my first public speaking engagement and I cried as I told the story of how losing my parents, moving to New York to pursue a job in entertainment, and feeling a since of failure after I was forced to move back to the hometown I grew up in with no money to my name, inspired me to launch my own website.  I was tired of sending out resumes and looking for a job — so I had created one.

Although I was still broke and living on couches, the perception was that my site was huge, was enough for those young women to find inspiration in my story. I found power in that. I also realized that speaking to young women gave me more fulfillment then those blogs I was posting every day.
But still, I kept posting. I had a vision of how big my site could be…but what I didn’t know was that God’s plan for me was bigger than my vision. Over the next seven years, I won awards, was featured in magazines that I grew up on, including Ebony and Cosmopolitan, I was on TV, I went on tour with a pop star (Hi Rihanna!), was offered television shows and acting roles (most of which I questioned if I deserved), and I was able to upgrade from those couches I was sleeping on to my own bed.
And the best part of it all was that it happened to a small town girl, who’s vision was greater than the amount of money she had to make it happen. Won’t he do it!

If I could do it, anyone can! 

Despite all of those things, I continued to notice that I was experiencing more fulfillment and success from women coming to me on the street and saying, ‘Your story inspires me so much!!’ than I did the ‘you got all the tea, I love your celebrity blog!!!’ I was getting more fulfillment out of speaking engagements, panels and inspirational interviews than I was flying to a luxurious location, given freebies and standing next to someone famous. I began measuring my success not by the amount of people who read my blog, or the money I made, but by the number of people I was able to touch, motivate and inspire.

I also started to realize what purpose was – and I knew to be happy, I had to start living a purpose-driven life. I had to start thinking about what I wanted my legacy to be, and what steps I’d have to take to start living in it.

I think about how I want to be remembered all the time and one thing I know for sure is that I never wanted to be known for being JUST ‘a celebrity gossip blogger.’

I’ve asked myself time and time again – When all is said and done, what will people say about you?  How are you elevating your audience? What are you doing to contribute to your culture in a positive way? Are you doing a good job of pushing the culture forward? How are you touching people and changing their lives? 

The fact that I can’t answer that right now is problematic for me.  I always felt that no matter how much positivity we promoted on the site, the salacious stories were always going to overshadow them.  The ‘Bitchie’ in the website name was always going to be counterproductive to the mission I had of being a source of inspiration, and launching a platform for women to tell their stories.

There is a constant internal struggle between being a character –Necole Bitchie—when I walk out in public, and being the women I know I was meant to be. Eventually, I began feeling like I wasn’t doing enough and I would never reach my goals. I felt stuck! I felt boxed in! No matter how much success people thought I had, or how many pageviews our stories generated, I felt as though I was regressing. There was also a constant struggle of what I thought my audience wanted to see (salacious tea), and what I wanted to post (Inspirational women interest stories.’) I was so exhausted from fighting that battle, that I literally felt defeated and I mentally gave up.

Over the last few years, people have sent me emails and asked, ‘Why don’t you post on your personal blog site anymore, that’s where I receive my inspiration.’  Honestly,  it was hard for me to be a source of inspiration when I’m enslaved in my own struggle.  I had to go back to fixing me first.
The other day, I read an article in the Harvard Business Review titled, ‘Stop Worrying About How Much You Matter‘ and I had to wonder if my refusal to throw in the towel was because I was afraid of irrelevancy. Most people go through a stage where they fear that people won’t care anymore — but that wasn’t really my issue.  Honestly, if I’m not relevant for the right reasons, I’d rather not be relevant at all.

I realized it was taking me awhile to get the guts to walk away and pursue my true life passion because 1) I felt as though I was being ungrateful to walk away from what has proven to be successful  and 2) I began living my life in fear.

That fear was not just because I was scared to fail – but I was also scared of how great I really could be.
To many people are not living their dreams because of fear.  I DO NOT want to become one of those people.
I had to destroy it, before it destroyed me.

For seven years, I’ve given this platform everything in me. Now, it’s time to refocus that energy into something that I truly believe in.

I hope that one day my story will inspire young women across the globe to pursue their heart’s desires, but I also want them to know that when their passion turns into a project, and it’s no longer fun anymore, that it’s okay to move on. It’s okay to evolve, and it’s definitely okay to reinvent. My favorite quote by Steve Harvey is ‘You have to give up something to get something.’ He always tells the story that after he gave up stand up comedy, he was given his own TV show, became an Emmy-nominated host on Family Feud, released books which were turned into movies and the list goes on. He now uses his gifts to grow a brand focused on empowerment and inspiration.

Standing at the top of a mountain, feeling accomplished and at the top of your game is cool, but in order to climb another mountain and start a new journey, you eventually have to climb down.  And you’ll never know how great you can be until you take that risk.

I would like to thank everyone for your continuous support over the years. It’s so hard to grow an audience on the web and I don’t take anything for granted. It means so much to me. I’d especially like to thank the writers who contributed to this site over the years (D. Joseph, Soraya Joseph, Erika Marie, Dwayne Yates, Tai Gooden, Kimmy Cason) , my videographers (Patrick Neree, Uniiqe and HD) and my friends who served as correspondents (Lauren Turner and Fallon Mercedes) for being amazing and assisting me in keeping this site running over the years. Also my sister Ma-Shyrra who learned how to sell ads and managed my social media when I was burned out. And I can’t forget my amazing publicist Christina Rice who has become an incredible friend and helped me get my story out there.

Lastly, thank you Bevy Smith.  Last year, I attended her ‘Life With Vision’ event in New York City as a guest and her story of leaving her full-time job and six figure salary as a rockstar sales exec at a well-known publication to pursue her dreams of one day being on television (even when no one believed in her) really inspired me.  I remember she brought me to the front of the room, to share my story of success with the attendees and I just stood there and cried while telling them that I knew it was time to move on.  That the number 7 meant completion.  It has taken me almost a year, but I’m doing it. That event changed me.

Also a word about my grandmother:  I used to sit and always wonder how she would feel about me and what I’ve accomplished if she was still alive.  She passed away when I was 15, was the only entrepreneur I knew at the time, and she continued to stress education and business ownership to me.  I am at peace today knowing that she would be smiling at me right now and be cheering me on as I step into the next part of my journey.

Although it is the end of Necole Bitchie – it’s not the end of my life journey. I’ve only scratched the surface of my true potential.

As I transition into my next chapter over the next few months, and hopefully launch something new and positive, I can only hope for your continued support.
It’s not a ‘good bye!’ per say. It’s a ‘See you soon!’
-Necole

88 comments:

Vicky Darl said...

She is not making money

Anonymous said...

Good for her.

STERN said...

But linda ikeji blog will last forever..lol

ROYAL PRIESTHOOD said...

Oh!

ali zenith said...

mma Linda is too long to read mbok

ugogold james O said...

2 long. She should hv send it to teco benson or Tchidi chikere or ujezu j ujezu. To shot 1 movie in nigeria.

NaijaDeltaBabe said...

Iffa hear say linda quit?

ugogold james O said...

2 long. She should hv send it to teco benson or Tchidi chikere or ujezu j ujezu. To shot 1 movie in nigeria.

Adetutu Babatunde-Edward said...

I hope linda isn't quitting soon sha. Too long abeg. Sombori summarize

paul elvis said...

Farewell in your future endeavors.

christie benjamin said...

Which kinda punishment be dis? Sh*t is too long....anyway, its her decision.

Anonymous said...

aww... i dont knw her, but its touching... linda when are u quitting?




meenah_wakil on instagram

ROYAL PRIESTHOOD said...

Oh!

Chika ibeh said...

good for her. long live linda ikeji blog!

ROYAL PRIESTHOOD said...

Indeed nothing in dis life is ever permanent for everytin is just transistion to d world beyond. Leave ur mark behind while u hav d chance. I wish her well, and thumbs up to her. Shalom!

Zenki Moye Brown said...

All da best to her.......


Moye says so via BB Passport...Courtesy LIB......

Anonymous said...

U need to do same Linda, it"s taking a Toll on ur personal LIFE!!!

green kelly said...

ok oo

ROYAL PRIESTHOOD said...

Indeed, it's time to move. I wish her well, and d best thereof in life. Thumbs up, and more power to her elbows.

ROYAL PRIESTHOOD said...

Indeed, it's time to move on. I wish her well, and d best thereof in life. Thumbs up, and more power to her elbows.

ary said...

Linda please wait a little longer before you tow this path, I would know what to do in the middle of the night if you ever stopped blogging. You gimme my daily fix.

helen nwachukwu said...

Amen lol

Adekunle Joseph said...

you inspired me........

BECKYS WORLD said...

When ll people learn to read? It's always too long. Sad, for d so called computer age. Nice piece, build something out of nothing, then moving on to higher and more fulfilling dreams. #dreamchaser I pray she achieve what she desires. #hustlinglegit.

Valentina Okologho said...

kpele

koleosho raliat olaide said...

Ehya
*iyawo Obama

precious oluchi said...

nice deicsion

ali zenith said...

Linda ansa our own qn na
hope u will nt quit oooo

Miz_wendy said...

Awwww.... quite sad. She's beautiful

Lindas Addict said...

Touching & inspiring .,. And may God bless her new chapter ,, it's not easy to be successful but we have to be strong till we get there ,

Anonymous said...

Linda where will you be lifting your urban American stories from?

Juliet Iwuno said...

Well done girl. Wishing her all the best in her future endeavors. Linda take note!

blogoratti said...

Necole will surely be missed.

austine urom said...

Wooow dis is best ting. Massage I hv come a cross dis year

AQO said...

Hmmm.








Jesus is Lord.

Peace Alaba said...

Oooooooooh my...!

Welldone
Happy quitting

Uchechi Chukwu said...

Wow.making sense follow ur dream no matter what is going to cost u.good right up.make sure u do u first before doing any other person hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

cynthia chukwu said...

Lucky her

Anonymous said...

Juliet, you can really be annoying with this your Linda take note. At least we know you now.
Notice me.
EWU
Mtcheeeeeeeeeeeew

Anonymous said...

Why should Linda quit when she is making money? Only a fool would do that unless the next offer is better! Abegee, do you think it is easy to be a successful blogger? Stop the jealous remarks. She no force you to look here ooo. Awon ika!

Oderinde Adeyinka said...

Good for her

Teemah Salau said...

So sad buh den if it's onto betters tins dats good...linda pls m begging u in the name of Allah n dis Holy month dnt bail on me..dnt dare leave dis blog pls m on ma knees.

kelvin andre said...

So linda when u wan quit

Cynthia 9ja said...

already feeling lyk she does,a decision that took tym 4 her 2 accept,ur beautiful in ur thoughts...hapi blog out

Anonymous said...

This has inspired d phase im in right now...

RAPHAEL AYUBA said...

Lindiway...no try us ohh.....u are not permitted to quit.....she looks good by the way......

Diary of Dido said...

Very brave lady.

ochouba chidinma said...

Too Long mbok!!.... Success in your future endeavors!!

TONIA GREEN said...

Linda please don't quit. But you can repent and quit posting pics of egg plants, transgenders /gays, nude pics and all the likes.

❤❤❤ THE PROPHETESS ❤ ❤ ❤

prettiyz said...

I wish her whatever she wish herself as she moves forward

Lois Yassat said...

This is inspiring

Grace Ade said...

oo gush good luck to ur quitting

Anonymous said...

OK oh. When Lindz will do hers, onyeka nwelue would console her.
~D great anonymous!

Anonymous said...

Linda nor fit quit now o, she dey make money so she gats continue.

Itohan Ogbebor said...

SO TOUCHING

Blessing West said...

She's a bitch and bitches don't last forever!

King Of Boys said...

Yeah cool to move on easily abroad Linda our economy and environment is different make sure you marry nd have children running dis blog

love charles said...

So touching and inspiring,,,I pray that the good Lord will inscrib ur name on d plate of greatness,,

Adrian Egonu said...

Linda do not quit o. Anyway i know u like cheddar .

Have u seen d leaked 2016 Toyota Landcruiser? Check out www.naijacarlovers.blogspot.com. It's awesome.

Anonymous said...

Hi Linda, it has been on my mind to comment for a while now but i never did for some strange reasons. Now i know why now. What better post to comment on but my very own Necole bitchie's post. I love her!!! You should take a cue from her.

Here it goes, during the chocolate royale saga, you said you weren't going to give out the information you had because you wanted to confirm. To the best of my knowledge, you never did. Except i missed the post.

You owe your readers the truth!!! I don't know maybe it is because you are friends with these "big" people and you want to favour them or you just couldn't be bothered about your readers that put the money in your pocket. There is something called integrity.

i never saw any post about that particular case. But like i said, i might have missed it and i apologise in advance. Take care.

yourstrulyblogposts.blogspot.com said...

Awwww bless Her - she's such a beautiful gorl

Innocentia Anny said...

Toooooo Long couldn't finish
Anyways all the best as you leave blog
Am sure you aiint making money innit
The earlier you leave the better
All the best bae

Anonymous said...

I knew that the 1st comment I would read on this very emotive mail would be very very stupid.

Effiezy.com said...

Inspiring letter, goodluck to her. Abeg auntie Linda, even if you marry billionaire please no quit blogging.
Imagine wat will happen to entertainment or gist reporting in Nigeria or even African, if there is no Linda.

Check on www.effiezy.com

Anonymous said...

I only read d last line,pls wat is the story book all about.

Motunrayo olaide said...

This is too long!

Benita Benish said...

Wish u al d best indeed

Anonymous said...

@Vicky Darl. You are nothing but an ignorant fool. Everything is not money and FYI, she made a lot of money blogging. Everything is not about mkney Ms Ignorant. A lot of people walk away from a well paying job to pursue something that fulfills them with little money. There is more to life than money

Anonymous said...

I think linda should follow . I know its hard but linda u might need to drop this blog and get on with your life.So you can get married and have a kid or 3. Linda is a good and beautiful woman. it would be very sad if she never gets married. Linda you have achieved so much but all that aint shit if you dont have kids to enjoy the fruits of your labor. You have 2 options. Higher a full time blog manager or you shut your blog down.

Amaka Ngenegbo said...

A very touching piece. Wish her the best in all her endeavours. Pretty girl.



#TeamBlessed#

aguwa godwin said...

U are very intelligent! Sane mind...

Lyndy Mk said...

Linda baby. I think you should take plenty of time to read and digest this. Do you also wanna b remembered as a gossip peddler, an eggplant lover? I kno you have a very good heart but in ur bid to make money and draw traffic to your blog, you end up posting things that won't leave you with a good legacy at the end of the day. Pls dear, sieve what you post on your blog. You have kids as young as 15 yrs on this blog. Don't mislead them. Who God has blessed, no man can curse so I can bet you that even if you don't post those extremely disgusting eggplant pics and stuffs lik that, you'll still get lots of viewers ok

Anonymous said...

@Violet. Sometimes, it's not about the money.Nicole is richer than Linda. There re Non-monetary things that re more important than money. Things like Self worth, legacy, posterity, fulfillment etc.

Nicole just wants to fill up the void her profitable blog cannot do.

Vivian Ezeadum said...

Your hair is beautiful and your skin tone is radiant.mmmm ur followers will miss you














~~~PINKY

emike marian said...

Awww! i feel she is gettig married soon,and d guy no like all dos bitchy lifestyle.....Gracias Necole i go mzz u gan ooo!!!

Anonymous said...

I hope linda can learn a thing or two from Necole Bitchie. I av been to her blog several times and she is like the linda ikeji of yankey. The only difference is when she actoually blogs she backs it up with lengthy details and something that makes u ponde. Not just copy and paste and what do you think or you like. I would really enjoy this blog more if linda can put more effort into this blog. At the end of the day, we want to be inspired by your thoughs and opinion. #rubbingminds sort of. Linda, it is your blog and we the readers wants to be able to feel some connection with you, like the yankee people felt for NECOLE. Hopefully u dont take this as an isult. This is from a fan that want the best out of this blog. Thats all.

Essien peace said...

Happy for her..

Anonymous said...

Hia! Shut which blog down? Biko Linda don't listen to dat advice! Inukwa? Linda sweetie you shall marry and birth your children wen your time comes and it shall come in Jesus name! But do not shut dis blog down, who said dat successful women don't marry? Wer else can I go to blast APC ppl? Lol!

OnPoint

Anonymous said...

Must you show u're a fool.. You're prolly one of d many idiats here who didn't read dis post b4 commenting... Too long y'll saying but u can read 'Catlyn rocks high heels'

Anonymous said...

I understand her struggles. It must be conflicting trying to live a purposeful life whilst posting some nonsense celebrity gossip. I am happy she took the higher road. I know she will be just fine !!

Linda,I feel you must relate to her struggles for you to have posted this. Blogging gossip and crappy stories can weigh down the spirit. You might want to consider cleaning up your blog and posting more meaningful stories.

Anonymous said...

I understand her struggles. It must be conflicting trying to live a purposeful life whilst posting some nonsense celebrity gossip. I am happy she took the higher road. I know she will be just fine !!

Linda,I feel you must relate to her struggles for you to have posted this. Blogging gossip and crappy stories can weigh down the spirit. You might want to consider cleaning up your blog and posting more meaningful stories.

Ifeoma Ekesiobi said...

I honestly feel sometimes you need to move on when yiu cannot answer this simple question. What will I be remembered for? Blogging is a full time job, so many people have their blogs for different reasons. I believe in the end when you're no longer happy with what you are doing no matter how successful you are, you should move on. She really inspired me with this post, will certainly reach higher to achieve my goals.


GABBY SPEAKS: MY JOURNEY

Master-Minder said...

Maybe she wasn't fulfilled in blogging but all the same it's a good thing she took to her heels realising that life isn't just about money.

mistafear said...

I wish ha well
and ha story is touching
and she is beautiful

Anonymous said...

Lmaoo

Anonymous said...

Linda take note! Nothing last forever so while it is still day use ur blog to lead people rightly, because u love immoral stories so u can generate more trafic at d expense of people's souls. U better spread d gospel of Christ through ur blog. Stop with d eggplants stories and maheeda stories and d likes. Have u ever thought.. how many souls have u won for Christ through ur blog??????? blog. Let God's word be ur standard not the world.

bummyla said...

All The Best LOVE!

http://www.bummyla.com

Ade Olasengbe said...

Wish you all the best

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