Dear LIB readers: Can you suddenly stop loving someone?
From a male LIB reader
When I say suddenly, I mean out of nowhere, just like that, without any reason or explanations everything you've ever felt is gone. I was madly in love with this girl for a year and nine months. In fact I was planning to propose to her on our second year anniversary when all of a sudden I woke up and all my feelings for her was gone. She didn't do or say anything wrong. Nothing about her changed. Nothing about me changed. We didn't even have an argument. One minute we were talking about going on a vacation together and the next minute I stop picking her calls and started avoiding her. It's been four months now since my feelings for her changed and I still can't make sense of it. She wants answers, she wants to know what she did wrong, why I all of a sudden ended things with her. She thinks I met someone else but I didn't. I just stopped loving her and didn't want her anymore. What happened to me? How can I find my way back to her?
Guy u r jst heartless u ve neva loved her in d 1st. Place stop decieving d poor gal..from all d toys in d world u Chose dis babes feeling to play wit..GOD HELP U..#NONSENSE#
@ anon 8:23 why do I think I know who u are? Don't make a life mistake. Try2 work it out wit her. U'r not forcing anything. Did u think bout it, make an effort or even pray bout it? So stp advicin pple wrongly. Hey bro, I'll advice u pray, ask ursef wt made u luv her in d 1st place n focus on dt. Or mayb u jst fil a need2 speak to oda ladies which is a huge distractn. Don't hurt her feelings cos ur nt sure of urs.
Sad, but I guess dat happens smtyms, u can't force or mke urself 2 fall in love wth sm1, love is a magical thing dat occurs just lyk dat,its possible u were never in love wth her but later realised, u jst need tym 2 figure it out.
@ Anonymous 8:23, you don't force it. U try to make it work. If you don't try to fix it, no one else will. Thank me later. Oga try new methods of rekindling the sparks. It gets boring @ times. Atleast try before thinking of giving up.
Mchewwww!!! You're not well, how's that even possible, only u can answer that question and don't decieve urself or anyone else that u don't. Be sincere with urself, tell urself the truth and then break it to her. You're funny ooo! You don't know ke!! Hisssssssssssssssssssssss! You sleep wakeup and you dnt love her again, kuku tell her its jazz!! Next blog Linda, its no wonder there are no comments.
U c... Ild advice you to pray about it. Also if derez no feeling watsoeva just tell er... Yea it will break her heart but she'ld get over it wif time. If u marry her when u feel nafin 4 her uld always regret n' make her suffer in d process. MARRY WHO U LOVE : meaning marry who u care about so much even when all isn't well. MARRY who u can easily give d last piece of meat 2 just to c her smile. MARRY who ur heart sings 4 regardless of her imperfections.
I lost d psn I loved to sm1else... Hez d only psn iv eva loved. Yea, it hurt like hell...pure hell buh I had to tell maself dat mayb "she" wuz d 1 for him. So I dusted maself n' stood... Coz I believe in happy endings.
So jus do wot ur heart wants. Don't let d world get in d way.
Infatuation?? For over a year?? I'd ask if u met her extended family...u shud knw wat I'm thinking. I just believe u've had ya fill...it's evident.The sex,the company et al,u r nw bored & with tym u'd b searching for greener & newer pastures.Pity the gal tho...for a relationship to last that long I'm sure she felt twud b goin towards something worthwhile. Pray...only God can help
This just happened to me recently. a total black out of emotions for no reason. The guy was awesome, we didnt argue, nothing but all of a sudden i couldnt stand him couldnt even bear to let him hold my hand. Its been 3months and the feelings are still not back. So, no you are not alone in this and there is nothing wrong with you...us..(i hope) Is she your first relationship after a break up? Maybe you were on the rebound. i have considered that too. Sadly there is no way to explain this to the person that you have hurt, try not to beat yourself up about it too much. Theres not much you can do except wait it out or move on.
To The LIB Reader... First i would like to Say Big ups to u for coming out to talk... The Fact is Maybe You didnt love her in the first place.. then u should sit her down and talk to her... makin an enemy from her someone who i am sure used to be ur bestie or stuff.. also u have to forgive urself becos the only thing certain about life is change... if u still love her u should work on ur self before u damage ur self and drown ur self in guilt
I know it's you and you know this is me.So you had to come here to say this..you couldn't tell me. For all the tears I shed for you, for all the nights I kept awake thinking what went wrong,for wasting my time...I won't judge you. You know how we started, you know everything i've been through in the past yet you went ahead to do this. From the start, I always asked you to be sure of your feelings and you assured me it was strong and true. Like I told you on the phone, it's only a matter of time, I will be fine again and I will go on with my life as if this never happened.
Mscheeeeeeewww BULLSHI*T!!! How is this even possible?? First of all, u never truly loved her! U know what u were about n what u were truly up to! Abeg stop acting like a kid right now cos u ain't! Sounding all clueless like u don't know the head n tail of all this mess!! Stop it man!! U not telling the truth! How f*cking heartless can u be to just like that start avoiding her sooo painfully?? Goshh!! Do u have a sister/sisters u really luv?? Will u luv for another man to treat them so?? Mehnnn some of u men n ur nonsense at times tho!...And people shud pls stop saying jazz this, jazz that! Jazz nothing!! On some "when all of a sudden I woke up and all my feelings for her was gone." BullCRAP n really go to hell!
The best way to start loving her again is by under going deliverance, am afraid if you don't go back to make things up with her that you will still walk away in your next relationship.
I can't help but be shocked at the rude, insentive and crude comments some people have made here. *shake my head*!! Linda how do you go through reading some of these comments?
Dear sir, you can't suddenly fall out of love with someone. It usually is a gradual process. You probably have not been fulfiled in the relationship and it reached it's limits.
And most importantly, you're making the major mistake of making the foundation of your love just feelings. It has to be a choice, and that choice has to be re-enforced by actions. Feelings can be fickle and undependable.
So if you would like to have her back, start by picking her calls, spending time with her and remind yourself that she's the same person you've loved before. And ask God to keep your love alive. All the best.
You were not in love with her, you were only infatuated and that has faded away. Its normal and happens to every one. So please, make her understand that you dont feel that way anymore and move on with your life.
probably she was suppose to be your revound girl from a previous break up, you got hooked as a way of dealing with your depression, now you just woke 4rm your depression and found out she isn't enough to feel the void, probably the fault is on you and never really opened up your true and real feeling about personal issues in your life, always trying to play safe
LMAO @ Ogun-idile (Family Curse) Oh dear there is nothing wrong with you, and if there is something wrong, it could be that you are not ready psychologically, you are too use to her aka see finish, you are still emotionally attached to ur immediate family, you have other things you want to work out first before settling down, or you probably din't grow in love with her cos you might not love her from the start o that is very possible o no mind all this LIBERs but u were physically attracted to her (infatuation). you probably saw her as a sex figure and you had it all.
I am going to give an advice based on my past experience. Note that I am a lady but I got this same attitude from like 4 of my ex, and afterwards i realised they dont hate me or nothing had gone wrong, they just cant continue the relationship. so we start up by going back to being friends and gradually go our separate ways. Take her somewhere nice talk to her to give you some time while you are just friends, during that period you will know if u still want to be with her or not, thereby not hurting her feelings. I am married now and some of my ex too are married and others in serious relationships. Don't try too hard cos somethings are not just meant to be. Its possible you are not meant for each other and in the nearest future you both would be glad you parted ways against all odds. Goodluck dude!
seriously relationship sucks and at times, i jst wished i cn do w/out it.rightn nw d only thing i n ma bf tlk abt is GOOD MORN', HOW WAS UR NITE, HOW WAS UR DAY, GOOD NIGHT.Ve tried all i can buh still not working. For dis guy, am sure even if u dnt love ur gf again, then u gt attached to another girl. dats d only reason y u wld suddenly walk away. Guys re jst confused being, who dnt knw what they want.
I would have said it is natural to feel that way from time to time, like a phase that will pass. But now I know better. Its juju at work. Somebody in your family or hers does not like the relationship and quickly waants to break it before it becomes too serious. Watch out!!! Stick to your girl if you really loves her
My dear,just sit down and recollect how you guys met,the wonderful times you guys shared,the good and bad memories,how you have always professed your undying love to her. Take her somewhere romantic. Just do something silly and childish,that is you have to forget your manly ego. I pray it works and you guys. Get back together and live happily ever after. Good luck.
250 comments:
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Guy u r jst heartless u ve neva loved her in d 1st. Place stop decieving d poor gal..from all d toys in d world u Chose dis babes feeling to play wit..GOD HELP U..#NONSENSE#
@ anon 8:23 why do I think I know who u are? Don't make a life mistake. Try2 work it out wit her. U'r not forcing anything. Did u think bout it, make an effort or even pray bout it? So stp advicin pple wrongly. Hey bro, I'll advice u pray, ask ursef wt made u luv her in d 1st place n focus on dt. Or mayb u jst fil a need2 speak to oda ladies which is a huge distractn. Don't hurt her feelings cos ur nt sure of urs.
Sad, but I guess dat happens smtyms, u can't force or mke urself 2 fall in love wth sm1, love is a magical thing dat occurs just lyk dat,its possible u were never in love wth her but later realised, u jst need tym 2 figure it out.
yu are a very stupid boy
@ Anonymous 8:23, you don't force it. U try to make it work. If you don't try to fix it, no one else will. Thank me later. Oga try new methods of rekindling the sparks. It gets boring @ times. Atleast try before thinking of giving up.
Mchewwww!!! You're not well, how's that even possible, only u can answer that question and don't decieve urself or anyone else that u don't. Be sincere with urself, tell urself the truth and then break it to her.
You're funny ooo! You don't know ke!! Hisssssssssssssssssssssss! You sleep wakeup and you dnt love her again, kuku tell her its jazz!! Next blog Linda, its no wonder there are no comments.
Reinkindle the flame.
U c... Ild advice you to pray about it. Also if derez no feeling watsoeva just tell er... Yea it will break her heart but she'ld get over it wif time.
If u marry her when u feel nafin 4 her uld always regret n' make her suffer in d process.
MARRY WHO U LOVE : meaning marry who u care about so much even when all isn't well. MARRY who u can easily give d last piece of meat 2 just to c her smile.
MARRY who ur heart sings 4 regardless of her imperfections.
I lost d psn I loved to sm1else... Hez d only psn iv eva loved. Yea, it hurt like hell...pure hell buh I had to tell maself dat mayb "she" wuz d 1 for him. So I dusted maself n' stood... Coz I believe in happy endings.
So jus do wot ur heart wants. Don't let d world get in d way.
J.
Him you mean
Bloody yansh man
dude wake up if you stopped loving her,you wnt have any consideration for her anymore..peace
Infatuation?? For over a year?? I'd ask if u met her extended family...u shud knw wat I'm thinking.
I just believe u've had ya fill...it's evident.The sex,the company et al,u r nw bored & with tym u'd b searching for greener & newer pastures.Pity the gal tho...for a relationship to last that long I'm sure she felt twud b goin towards something worthwhile.
Pray...only God can help
FLESH AT WORK
This just happened to me recently. a total black out of emotions for no reason. The guy was awesome, we didnt argue, nothing but all of a sudden i couldnt stand him couldnt even bear to let him hold my hand. Its been 3months and the feelings are still not back.
So, no you are not alone in this and there is nothing wrong with you...us..(i hope)
Is she your first relationship after a break up? Maybe you were on the rebound. i have considered that too. Sadly there is no way to explain this to the person that you have hurt, try not to beat yourself up about it too much. Theres not much you can do except wait it out or move on.
All the best.
-Me
I wonder how you read for your exams not to talk of passing them, if this is long in your eyes
Future Solomon Akiyesi!
Yes it's possible..Just keep praying.
Go nd pray abt it,coz it nt normal
To The LIB Reader... First i would like to Say Big ups to u for coming out to talk... The Fact is Maybe You didnt love her in the first place.. then u should sit her down and talk to her... makin an enemy from her someone who i am sure used to be ur bestie or stuff.. also u have to forgive urself becos the only thing certain about life is change... if u still love her u should work on ur self before u damage ur self and drown ur self in guilt
I know it's you and you know this is me.So you had to come here to say this..you couldn't tell me. For all the tears I shed for you, for all the nights I kept awake thinking what went wrong,for wasting my time...I won't judge you. You know how we started, you know everything i've been through in the past yet you went ahead to do this. From the start, I always asked you to be sure of your feelings and you assured me it was strong and true.
Like I told you on the phone, it's only a matter of time, I will be fine again and I will go on with my life as if this never happened.
chai your village people are after you ooooo lmfao..... dis just very weird.
Mscheeeeeeewww BULLSHI*T!!! How is this even possible?? First of all, u never truly loved her! U know what u were about n what u were truly up to! Abeg stop acting like a kid right now cos u ain't!
Sounding all clueless like u don't know the head n tail of all this mess!! Stop it man!! U not telling the truth!
How f*cking heartless can u be to just like that start avoiding her sooo painfully?? Goshh!! Do u have a sister/sisters u really luv?? Will u luv for another man to treat them so?? Mehnnn some of u men n ur nonsense at times tho!...And people shud pls stop saying jazz this, jazz that! Jazz nothing!!
On some "when all of a sudden I woke up and all my feelings for her was gone." BullCRAP n really go to hell!
not broken just bent. it happens if u truly had feeling for her then you'll find your way back
you are a faggot.
The best way to start loving her again is by under going deliverance, am afraid if you don't go back to make things up with her that you will still walk away in your next relationship.
I can't help but be shocked at the rude, insentive and crude comments some people have made here. *shake my head*!! Linda how do you go through reading some of these comments?
Dear sir, you can't suddenly fall out of love with someone. It usually is a gradual process. You probably have not been fulfiled in the relationship and it reached it's limits.
And most importantly, you're making the major mistake of making the foundation of your love just feelings. It has to be a choice, and that choice has to be re-enforced by actions. Feelings can be fickle and undependable.
So if you would like to have her back, start by picking her calls, spending time with her and remind yourself that she's the same person you've loved before. And ask God to keep your love alive. All the best.
it could just be u r interested in men lol
guy, all i can say is think back, something must have happened for you to stop loving her. except if true true '' na jazz she do you before''.
you don't just stop loving someone just like that. think back, something must have caused that. except if true true na jazz she been deh use!!
Well said....
You were not in love with her, you were only infatuated and that has faded away. Its normal and happens to every one. So please, make her understand that you dont feel that way anymore and move on with your life.
probably she was suppose to be your revound girl from a previous break up, you got hooked as a way of dealing with your depression, now you just woke 4rm your depression and found out she isn't enough to feel the void, probably the fault is on you and never really opened up your true and real feeling about personal issues in your life, always trying to play safe
love dont jes fade like dat except if u were just infatuated in the first place.
love dont jes fade like dat except if u were just infatuated in the first place.
uv gotten all u want dude.. E hapenz tho
LMAO @ Ogun-idile (Family Curse) Oh dear there is nothing wrong with you, and if there is something wrong, it could be that you are not ready psychologically, you are too use to her aka see finish, you are still emotionally attached to ur immediate family, you have other things you want to work out first before settling down, or you probably din't grow in love with her cos you might not love her from the start o that is very possible o no mind all this LIBERs but u were physically attracted to her (infatuation). you probably saw her as a sex figure and you had it all.
I am going to give an advice based on my past experience. Note that I am a lady but I got this same attitude from like 4 of my ex, and afterwards i realised they dont hate me or nothing had gone wrong, they just cant continue the relationship. so we start up by going back to being friends and gradually go our separate ways. Take her somewhere nice talk to her to give you some time while you are just friends, during that period you will know if u still want to be with her or not, thereby not hurting her feelings. I am married now and some of my ex too are married and others in serious relationships. Don't try too hard cos somethings are not just meant to be. Its possible you are not meant for each other and in the nearest future you both would be glad you parted ways against all odds.
Goodluck dude!
seriously relationship sucks and at times, i jst wished i cn do w/out it.rightn nw d only thing i n ma bf tlk abt is GOOD MORN', HOW WAS UR NITE, HOW WAS UR DAY, GOOD NIGHT.Ve tried all i can buh still not working. For dis guy, am sure even if u dnt love ur gf again, then u gt attached to another girl. dats d only reason y u wld suddenly walk away. Guys re jst confused being, who dnt knw what they want.
I would have said it is natural to feel that way from time to time, like a phase that will pass. But now I know better. Its juju at work. Somebody in your family or hers does not like the relationship and quickly waants to break it before it becomes too serious. Watch out!!! Stick to your girl if you really loves her
Is either ur tired of her pussy or u get spiritual wife.#gbam
big baby...dats wat u are....grow up!!!
Yeahh that definitely wasn't love. looks like the dopamine has finally worn off for you. it happens ....
Thank you.
She's not for you period...The earlier the better so she can move on...
Sharaaap! Apparently you don't know the meaning of love, fake lover
Only one word*Infatuation*
Could be SPIRITUAL or JUST YOU.PRAYER IS THE KEY
Err..the jazz don clear from ya eye.
My dear,just sit down and recollect how you guys met,the wonderful times you guys shared,the good and bad memories,how you have always professed your undying love to her. Take her somewhere romantic. Just do something silly and childish,that is you have to forget your manly ego. I pray it works and you guys. Get back together and live happily ever after.
Good luck.
For you to publish this means you still love just take your and rediscover the spark.
Same thing happened to me. But the truth is there was someone else in the picture.
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