If you listen to relationship programmes on radio, you would notice that many Nigerians are indeed struggling with their relationships and marriages and they are all seeking help. And because they do not have a glaring media attention serialising their issues, making judgments, giving strong commentary, poking them emotionally, there are chances of their relationships and marriages problems being solved.
Why is it that with the fame, fortune and good looks, our celebrities’ marriages still don’t work? It has been a strange phenomenon that the union of people in the limelight hardly lasts, indeed. So the question is, why do most celebrity marriages crash frequently?
Fame is dangerous to relationships for
many reasons. Most troubling is that it demands that a couple spend time
away from each other. One indicator of happiness in a relationship is
the amount of time spent with one’s partner.
Spending time together is necessary to
sustain a relationship, yet celebrities tend to ignore this and only
focus on how to become more famous. You need to keep up with each
other’s lives, look into each other’s eyes, and be in the same physical
space to feel the mood and emotions from each other.
Without that, you might love each other, but staying “in love” demands much more than occasional get-together.
The man who loves you may start losing
feelings because of the demands of your job. Your spouse, for instance,
wants you to be home, but you cannot be at home because you are either
on location or at one event or another socialising as a celebrity.
Celebs are expected to be extroverts –
attending parties, or going to bars or clubs. Your spouse may not like
all that. These things take their toll and it gets to a point when one
of the parties says that he or she has had enough, and then packs his or
her bag and leaves.
Most celebs don’t really take time to
understand each other or truly understand what marriage is about before
venturing into it. Some even see it as just an added feather to their
cap. They love to gather people together, go to church and stand before
the altar to exchange vows in front of the congregation. There is
actually more to marriage than the physical appearance.
The pressure to live up to certain
standards and give a good impression also contributes to marital splits
among celebs. Because of their status, they put too much unnecessary
pressure on themselves and try too hard to live up to the standard of
others.
Most tend to live a life that is not
theirs. The pressure of wanting to create or give people the impression
of having a sense of perfection will certainly make your marriage
crumble. Put a stop to all the pretence and be real to yourself.
Infidelity is the most common cause of
most celebrity marriage break-ups in Nigeria. Some spouses have left
their marriages when they could no longer bear the indiscretions of
their unfaithful partners.
Infidelity is not restricted to
celebrities only. It is a major source of marital discord today. But
what makes that of celebrities different is the temptation they face
regularly. Because of living their lives constantly in the spotlight and
fame, they are presented with more ‘opportunities’ to cheat than
others.
When musicians, for instance, go for
shows, girls throw themselves at them. Even a Reverend Father can get
tempted with all the ‘offerings.’ If one partner is constantly
unfaithful, it can cause discord in the marriage.
Jealousy is also a problem in celebrity
union. If one, for instance, has more fame, more success than the other,
it can cause problems if the other party does not have the strength of
character to cope with his or her partner being constantly in the
limelight.
It takes a very strong man or woman to
endure his wife, for instance, being more famous, getting more attention
than them. You attend a party, and your husband or wife observes you
being embraced and kissed here and there, jealousy starts getting into
the marriage. It doesn’t even matter if both of you are celebrities.
Put your ego aside. As celebs, you’re
going to be constantly fighting for the limelight. But marriage is all
about concessions, even if it takes one of you to have to ride in the
backseat for awhile for things to work out.
Money is the root of most problems in
marriages. When your wedding planning starts taking the shape of a
corporate board meeting, you’re already in trouble. Play deaf to the
rumours. Celebrities are always insecure about one thing or another, and
it is the reason a lot of media rumours are going to tear your already
shaky relationship to shreds. Stop selling your privacy in pictures, on
Twitter, Instagram or Facebook.
Choose whether you want to remain single
or get married. Marriage is hard when you are used to being in control
all the time. But suddenly you can’t just wake up one morning and jet
off to Abuja or London for a weekend with your friends or spend N100,000
on a pair of shoes without certain considerations.
When you’re used to being the centre of
your world, it is not easy to take that step back and let someone else
have a major stake in your life.
Like every electronic device, marriage
comes with a manual which must be followed to the letter if you want it
to be successful. Celebrity marriages will continue to crash as long as
they are building them on themselves and not on God, who is the
initiator of marriage.
103 comments:
Kinda true..u spoke well Etc..welldone
Kinda true..u spoke well Etc..welldone
ECTERA RE U MARRIED?????
PPLE WILL STILL CUM ND APPLUAD U FOR WRITING DIS.....
DIS DUDE HAS CHANGED IS PROFESSION @ LINDA.....
ECTERA D WRITER....
GDMONI LINDA ND LIBERS... AV A BLESSED WKEND
Personally I don't care about whatever he writes but the fact that he writes just about issues that concerns celebs is annoying, if u wanna be a writer u have to be diversed all ur topics shouldn't be celebrities centered, with that it shows u r angry and jealous of them cos u failed at being one. Pls honestly u write well but write meaningful things that we will all gain from and respect u for. Peace
Loud it!!! Another wonderful piece from Et cetera. U hit the nail on the head.
~BONARIO~says so via NOKIA LUMIA
9ce one
So correct
He keeps writing not minding the insults
I love this piece
Www.omosarah.com
Brilliant!
Ok mr example..well said..but spending 100k on a shoe..is nufn bro..anybody in a relationship wit a celeb shld knw wat to expect..............in other news I'm back..travelled to owerri with daddy showkey..still in owerri..too busy I didn't open ur blog aunty linda........................................#KingOfKings
Officially, Etcetera is my newest crush, well after Enyeama.
He didn't mention names this time, № one should come here mentioning names.
dis article is wayyy better! it was objective and ddnt come açross as jealous n bitter
Good write up,I love this.Your analysis is correct,you have given all the reasons why their marriages don't work & will never work unless a partner chooses to play the fool or both of them are doing the same.But Etc,try to go back to music.
He. Said it all......onye nwere nti ya nuru.
True talk,who will be the next celeb to take this personal?
###########GOD bless#####################Naija
Bro u ve said it all.hope they are seeing this.
WHAT A WONDERFUL WRITE-UP. I JUST WISH THE READERS WILL APPRECIATE THIS GREAT MESSAGE RATHER THAN CONDEMING THIS TALENTED WRITER AS USUAL. ANYWAYS TRUTH THEY SAY IS ALWAYS BITTER. MANY THANKS ..... ETCETERA
celebrities marriage will cotinue to crash as long as them build it on themselves but not on God who is the initiator of marriage, what an insight linda i need more of dis guy i swear.#THAT AKWA IBOM BOY#
Lovely write-up. I'm inspired. As an aspiring celebrity I will put all these into consideration b4 venturing into marriage. Kudos Etcetera. I'm out. ***CATCH ME IF U CAN***
The truth is that their are no down to earth women ready to grow with their husbands. They all want already made guys to maintain a standard and the media caused it. How can kim k be a girls role model and you expect the marriage to last when her role model could not even stay,lol..our fathers are just the lucky guys
can some one shut dis guy up already,
Word!
Etcetera or whatever ure cld seriously don't know wat ure insinuating, a man dat ain't a celebrity, dat marry a celebrity should know wat happens in a celebrity's life style,sometin wiv a woman dat marries a celeb,she should be ready for whatever is going on out in d world,direct ur talk to whoever u wanna yab& stop beating abt the bush man.all dis is cld airi oro so in yoruba language. Linda swallow dis comment if u like.
This guy write up is good,I wonder why people like freeze is hating,instead learning good from it..if he failed as a singer to him,how about as a writer? Keep it etc..
Etcetera, u really are just good... am so damn sure dat some fools will still find something wrong with this article when they should've rather learn from it, the guy doesn't even give a damn'bout wat ur bitter ass(es) tweet about him... keep doing ur thing man and leave them in their woes...
@so_distinct
Last paragraph...followed to the later not letter. Insightful article, but why celebrities all the time? Leave them alone nah. Haba!
what the fuck is wrong with this dude???always complaining and attacking people....get a life dude..We sick and tired of Ya Face..
Though wat he's saying is d truth bt ow is it his business.
Hehee,et cetra don talk again. Good opinion,yes marriage should be built on God who is the initiator.
A minister of the gospel wouldn't have said it better. I traded limelight for my relationship, as a man I just wanna love my wife and family. God help us because leavers don't cleave..leaving is embedded on selfish and demonic reasons, if you did right in the first place things will be under control!
Steady stating the obvious
True Talk.
Useless write up, as if everything there isn't already common knowledge.
Brilliant write-up. Wish most celebs knew this
It seems Celebrities are now the selling point for Eceteera. He should thread softly so as not to make a lot of enemies in the media because he would one day needs this celebs favour.
Alright electra we've heard you #bright bravo#
Criosly wats wit dz guy...i knw everyone is entitled to hz or her opinions buh he taks hz opinions too far
Pls visit my shoe blog
http://glowysofiscated.blogspot.com
They should take a clue from captain Ekeinde. He's a strong man I must say cos most men can't stand that their spouse is famous than they are, the same way men feel about a woman having more cash than them. True talk!
I couldn't agree more. He is sooo right. God should be the foundation of all marriages. Chelizrubycube.com for naija weight loss tips.
Am kinda liking this guy 's write ups...this is absolutely true
Very true and correct. Celebrities and the general public take note. That's why lindodo is taking her time to study the manual
Second article coming from this dude that I think makes sense...heheheheh who know's I might end up liking this guys's write ups afterall.
Ok
It's 'latter' not 'later'. Next time cross-check before you correct. Nobody sabi pass! "Marriage is hard when you're used to been in control all the time". I do not have to be married to totally agree with this. Relinquishing control and authority is no hobby to mortals.
seeehn if you dont understand something dont condemn it. ETC's previous write-ups came off as bitter although with some truth but his method of passing across his message was askew.
Now this write up has depth and is objective as he picked a farmiliar subject to him which is celebs but also generalised on relationships/marriages across the board.
i give him two snaps for this
why cant some people read through the write up before drawing up conclusions. The writer didn't only refer to celebrities but also to the common man. He put facts into words for it to sink in better. He is saying the truth irrespective of if he is married or not.
At least he has a fine yummy face, can u show your ugly one in public. Grow some sense and learn from the messenger instead of letting jealousy cause you to hang the messenger
Etcetera is the MAN! Unlike Freeze dat can't change career. Always spitting on the mick as a radio dj. Nor be only OAP...na oh shit freeze!!!
Very insightful. ..Etcetera is a good writer
some people wldnt appreciate good things even if it was given to dem...some anynymous nitwart said he doesnt care wat he writes cos he only writes abt celebrities n so he's jealous...u wld make a good candidate in B.H cos u jst cnt see d clear pix..there are some journalist who only writes abt specified celebrities not even all celebs...people chose to write wat dey can relate to,irrespective...so shush it,eat sum ewa goyin and a satchet of pure of water n prob sleep..yeye foul..etc,good write up bruv...u doing good...no mind peepz like dis and dt rejected albino..
I av always known you are one mugu like that. The last time I told you to keep your dealings to yourself. Better still call her if you wish to tell her where u traveled to. Don't be forming on this blog like you are one president's son. You are hangin out with Daddy showkey? U see your class?? Mgbada !!!
True talk but must he mention celebrities?
Bia what's your name? Don't be feeding us with news of your personal life. Did anybody miss you ? NO ! So STFU..
King of pigs, 100k is nufn? Really. Am sure u don't have a family yet and no responsibilities. wheh u do am sure you will know better then..
A very insightful article. And it doesn't apply to celeb marriages alone, even non-celebs.
Celebrity marriages end more frequently than ones between ordinary people because of finances. The ordinary woman can't leave her marriage because she's dependent on her husband financially, and the alimony and palimony laws don't favor her. With celebs, there's more financial independence for the women. They know they can be successful without a man so they're less likely to endure or tell themselves they must stay in failed relationships because God hates divorce.
Caught a headache after reading the write up ugh!!! Give it up already
My dear Etc, u have a very strong voice. I just heard ur Song "Ring the Alarm" is a very powerful song but is so painful that 9ja will not understand ur kind of Song all dey want to dance to is noise. U just got ur self a great fun I swear down, am a lover of good song Music and u are good at it. May God show mercy on ur work so the world not just 9ja will see wt dey have been missing. Love ur voice to the mood
This guy is good, with this kind of write ups, I see u becoming a well known writer...
First piece I've read from this dude that actually makes good sense.
Old School Marriage Advice- click my name to read more.
for d person asking ''why he writes abt celebraties''dnt u think d newspaper might have employed him as a celebrity columnist?all i know is he talks abt what u all want to hear,all d ppl yabbing him whether unda anony or wt fake ac names are d affected!savour yr stardom and allow him to savour his own skills as a writer!you hv every write to criticise him but abusing him makes u uneducated!
"One indicator of happiness in a relationship is the amount of time spent with one’s partner.
Spending time together is necessary to sustain a relationship..."
If only we know the value of time... more precious and so elusive... than money. Knowing fully well that this life is too short not to spend them with those we care about. How many of us have heard this song "If I could save time in a bottle"?
Ecetera d writer...
Nice one,I used to dislike this dude,buh with this article am havin a. Second thought.
Omigosh!! Daddy shokey? Of all peeps? And who asked u king of kings? Buhaahahahah! Ndi mmadu sef
Let's see who will cast the first stone! Linda is just steady using this guy's articles on her blog so she can stir up hate and then she has more stories.
Y r u so paind nd full of jealousy towards ur peers.....na dem tel u 2 fail fr muzik?now ur talkin abt marriage like u kw wat dey sufa behind close door........ Go get a life nd start sellin bread coz datz wea u wil mak t.....
~@iamJbankz Olamide's PA~
Nne, ina asaku ndi Mmadu too much. Odiro mma for Nwanyi . Just an advice
Spot on.!! That this guy failed as a music artist doesn't mean he can't succeed at writing. Let's face it, we've all failed at something and tried other things so y'all should stop being saintly and crucifying the guy. Every industry has critics and they come in different forms.
Thats why they are called writers my darling
I totally disagree with the part that says "marriage comes with a manual". That would mean stereotyping marriages, but every marriage is unique and its up to the couple involved to work hard at discovering what makes their marriage tick. Every other point etcetera raised am in support of.
Nice 1
Thank you sir
The guy isn't a failed musician,he has great voice,write and sing meaningful song. Have u heard Ring the alarm. We 9ja don't appreciate good music,ETC u re doing well 4 urself inbtw a nice article I learnt frm it.
How is it his business ??? What a question its evident u don't know what an ARTICLE is ... *smh*
I bet won't of these dudes with negative comment didn't even read it to completion.
Lol, Broda yii sha, but seriously people tho, he has a point. But he actually needs to get off celebs dicks tho,why not write about Amala Politicians e.g Ayo Fayose and the rest of them.
OOH MY O MY ETCETERA U ARE TOOMUCH AND GOD BLESS U FOR THIS, I KNEW U WHERE GONNA BRING IN THE EXCEPTIONAL LYRICAL POWER IN UR SONGS INTO UR WRITE UP'S AS I AM ONE OF THOSE WHO ENJO THE FLOW IN UR MUSICAL LYRICS.
BUT U MUST BECAREFUL OF JEALOUSY JEALOUSY PEOPLE WHO FEEL THREATEN ALREADY B'CUS OF UR BLUNTNESS AND NUMBER ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE IS FREEZE OF COOL FM. KEEP IT UP ETCETERA! (9ijaborn yankeebased).
The fact that this man has a failed music career has already discredited him. I could never waste my time reading the article of someone whose orientation is birth from bitterness. If he claims to be a writer then let him write about other topics government, lifestyle, public behavior, Nigerians etc and not about other people's lives who managed to make something in the same field where he failed, is he married himself? does he have any experience in marriage? I guess not, so how come he is now a marriage councilor? I don't subscribe to people who operate via jealousy and bitterness, its just not my way.. when he has exhausted all his bitterness in writing what next? My advice for the young man is to go and change career, become a proper writer and stop wasting your time down-casting and pointing fingers on the same industry you couldn't get into. People will get tired of you very soon and your moment of glory in writing will fade away just like your musical career has faded away.. a word is enough for the wise..
I'm sure most pple here haven't listened to his songs.. Listen to "federal character", "ring the alarm" etc nd u wld agree with me thats exactly the kind of song my beloved country needs now... Nice Write-ups though..... ODO
Nice one,guess his style of writing is solely on celebrities.
Annie Idibia hope you're reading this. Instagram celeb..
Sweet 2 read.. U really hit d point . Nice one
Lili , abeg approval dis . Pls try change ur profile pix . Ogini !
Am already loving dis guy!!!! Well said dear
This dude looks like joker, when he smiles, very creepy looking!!! Who made him the authority on marriage, is he married? The dude is like an annoying pest, when you think you have got rid of him, he comes back with more conceited rants, in the guise of long epistles.... He should go and write a book, and desist from rubbing his colleagues off the wrong way!!! Jeez, and Linda, Liadi and co stop pandering to this nonsense, and stop giving him a platform to rant!!! What has he said, that anybody married or not, does not know already, he is insulting our intelligence smh!!!Whizman
Thunder fire u wilHOEminna moses and steve Anus 4 Real..I came down to owerri cos of justice oputa's burial..u pple are just stupid jobless pple..@wilHoeminna showkey will train u in sch u stupid bitch....................................#KingOfKings
Y r some people called this man a failed musician? In naija, when u r blunt, they 'll call u all kinds of names. Radarada pple. Nice writeup jare
He didn't failed as a music artist, people like u failed to understand good music
True talk. I like this guy.
King of Ndi Isi Mmebi,lol
#justpassing
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I'm back,travelled to owerri.......stl in owerri.......too busy, wch 1 is d truth nw? U r back or u stl dey owerri? Anyway,op u won't announce on TVC wen u go USA & mistakenly see any caleb dre . Lol. Cos ds 1 na only owerri & daddy shokey u dey tel linda lik say she evn care or observe ur absence.
I believ Lyndy mk is a grammatical guru cos I closely follow her comments. So carelessly missin a 't' is more pardonable than substituting letter wt latter abeg and etc nah writer so he should kno better. And he should stop talkin too much
All these usless hatibg machines... sumhow i feel Etc is talkin about u guys but ur stupid small head wont let u sit down nd listen, if na tb joshua talk am u go listen ...... Ndi Aru
Nice write up. To the people saying all sorts can you just read the write up and acknowledge that he is right. Stop being judgmental.....
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Nice write up! But sometimes write UPS don't change who or what we are over night no matter how insightful they may appear. At the end of the day it is always easier said than done. The only sure foundation is having all endeavors built on the knowledge that there is a God who can always make our path straight even when others appear crooked. So we must always trust in God!
Charlesendy aka Dr pepper....its not been in control but BEING. #gbam
It is very obvious some pple went to school to come out more uneducated.... How is a celebrity columnist expected to write on sports n politics? Should Sola Sobowale, Reuben Abati, Nasir El Rufai n those gamji political columnist be expected to write about nollywood or music?
Truth is he is actually a good writer...
I love dis guy, d reason being dat he says d truth dats d reason d affected go afta him e.g dat she musician & dat OAP guy.....
Even though you are a failed musician you are a very good writer Etcetera
Nice one bro......freeze can go to hell. Truth is always bitter
He didn't fail as a musician. There are many talented musicians who have not been a commercial success and that doesn't make the wizkid's and the 2face's better off than him talent wise. I wonder if u will call Timmy Dakolo a failed artiste to
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