Ogochukwu Onuchukwu (Nee Onugu). 23/10/1976 - 27/2/2012 |
A dead woman, Ogochukwu Onuchukwu (she died last month) shares her story and writes a letter to her husband from the grave. I culled the letter from her WEBSITE and wanted to share it because it's something we all need to read and hopefully someone will learn from it. Read it below...
My mum is crying. I can see her from here. She has aged since the last time I saw her. Why does she look so old and why is she so thin? Can someone console her? Can someone make her stop crying?
I try to get up but I can’t. I try to reach for her, but I’m stuck where I am. It is very dark in here, and very cold, so very cold.This just messed with my head...I hope you fair better. Continue reading...
What am I doing here? Where is everybody? Where are my children? I begin to panic, to struggle; I want to get out of this dark room.
I can hear Uzo calling. She’s calling my name. Then, I see mum again. And I hear Uzo again. I don’t see my children. Where are my children? I can’t see beyond the walls of this dark and cold room.
Uzo calls again.
She sounds desperate to rouse me from my sleep. I am struggling to wake but I can’t. I open my eyes and they shut of their own accord.
I am powerless to keep them from shutting. And I find as soon as I stop struggling, my sleep becomes sweet repose. Suddenly I don’t want to wake from it just yet. It is peaceful.
I see mum again, and I see Uzo. Uzo keeps calling. She won’t stop calling. She is crying too, just like mum.
Can someone bring Kamsi and Amanda to me? Can someone bring my babies to me? I need to hug them, Kamsi, especially. Is he crying too and calling out for me? Does he understand that I am gone? Kamsi will miss me.
He is a special child, you know; Kamsiyochukwu - my son and my first child.
I prayed and longed for his birth. He was the blessing from above that would seal Kevin’s love for me and give me some footing in his home and some acceptance from his family.
Before Kamsi, I was a nobody in Kevin’s home. I was born the last of nine children, the baby of the family. I was used to love and affection. I was everyone’s baby. I grew up knowing that everyone had my back, I grew up knowing the safety and security of being the baby of the home. You may then understand my shock when I stepped out of my home and into new territory with the man of my dreams only to find that I was really not as special as I had been made to believe. I look back to that day when Kevin took me home to introduce me to my new family. The cold and rude shock of the welcome his brother’s wife gave me set off an alarm in my head.
These people didn’t think I was special. In fact, her first words were, ”Kevin, ebe kwa ka isi dute nka?” (Kevin, “Where on earth did you bring this one from?) That would be the first time I would be addressed as “this one” and from then on, I grappled with the realization that I was not welcome in my new home.
I remember my first Christmas at Ihiala as a new bride. My brother-in-law’s wife would sneer and clap and refer to me as “Ndi ji ukwu azo akwu” (the people who process palm fruits with their bare feet). I knew she meant my impoverished home town of Nsukka. She would sing to me all day long telling me the only reason why their brother married me was because of my beauty and complexion.
Now, I lie here and I wonder if I was in my right mind to ignore the several other alarms over my 12- year union with Kevin.
I had to ignore them, I told myself. I had already taken my vows to be with Kevin until death did us part.
They never really wanted me, I can now see. But I was too blinded by love to realize that. I needed to do something to cement Kevin’s heart with mine. I needed to remain Kevin’s wife and to prove to the world that indeed Love would conquer all.
When after one year of marriage there were still no children, the painful journey that sent me to my grave started. I went from specialist to specialist, ingested every kind of pill that promised to boost my fertility. As my desperation grew, so did pressure from Kevin’s family. My horror-movie life story started playing out; the horror-movie life that has sent me to an early and cold grave from where I write this letter to my husband.
*********************************************************************************
My sweet Kevin,
We started to fight over little things. The fights were worse after you visited home or attended any of your numerous family meetings. You came home one evening and asked me to move out of the bedroom we both shared and into the guestroom downstairs. The next time you returned from the meeting, you tied me up with a rope and used your belt on me. No one heard my screams.
I remember when you told me that your family had asked you to remarry. You showed me documents of all your numerous landed property including the house we lived in. Your brother was listed as next of kin. When I asked you about it, your answer rocked the ground I was standing on. You said, “What have you to show that entitles you to any stake in this household?” You were referring to my barreness.
It is funny how to my family and friends, I was the beautiful and loving Ogo, whilst to you and your family I was a worthless piece of rag. You called me barren. I could have fled but your love and acceptance was of more worth to me than the love and admiration of the world outside our home. I desperately sought to be loved by you, Kevin.
In your family’s presence I felt unworthy, unloved and unwanted. Yet, I stayed on. I would make you love me one way or the other and I knew that one sure way would
be to produce a child, an heir for you. That was the most important thing to you.
I began the numerous procedures, painful procedures, including surgery. I gave myself daily shots. At some point the needles could no longer pierce my skin. My skin had toughened to the piercing pain of needles.
After seven years of marriage, our prayers were answered. God blessed us with our son Kamsiyochukwu, which means ‘’Just as I asked of the Lord’’. God had intervened and miracles were about to start happening because for the first time in seven years, my mother-in-law called me. Finally I was home. I had been accepted. I was now a woman, a wife and a mother. Finally there was peace. Kamsi will be four in November.
The miracles stayed with me because 18 months later through another procedure, Chimamanda was born. Her birth was bitter sweet for me. Sweet because you Kevin, my husband, and my in-laws would love me more for bearing a second child, but bitter because this particular birth almost cost me my life. The doctors had become very concerned. You see, I had developed too many complications from all the different procedures I had undergone in the journey to have children and these were beginning to get in the way of normal everyday living. I developed conditions that had almost become life threatening. So the doctors sent me off with my new bundle of joy and with a stern warning not to try for another child as I may not be so lucky.
I chuckled, almost gleefully. Why would I want to try for a third child? God had given me a boy and a girl, what more could I ask for. I was only ever so thankful to God.
Kevin, you and I gave numerous and very generous donations to different churches in thanksgiving to God. All was well. I was happy and fulfilled. Kevin, you loved me again. Your family accepted me. Life was good. And all was quiet again. …………………… For a while.
Then fate struck me a blow. As if to remind me that my stay in your house was temporary and was never really going to be peaceful, Kamsi – our son, our first fruit, my pride and joy and the child that gave me a place in my husband’s home, began to show signs of slowed development; the visits to the doctors resumed, this time on account of Kamsi.
We started seeing therapists. After we’d been from one doctor to another I decided I had to resort to prayer. I was frightened. I was terrified. I was threatened. I started to feel unwell. I had difficulty breathing. I needed to see my doctors, Kamsi too. He wasn’t doing too well either. He had difficulty with his speech. He was slow to comprehend things. I did not know for sure what was wrong with him but I knew all was not well. Not with him and not with me. We
were denied visas to the USA because we had overstayed on our last trip on account of Kamsi’s treatments. So whilst we waited for a lawyer to help us clear up the immigration issues with America, I applied for a UK visa and sought help in London. But by then, trouble had reared its head at home, again.
Kevin, you had again become very impatient with me. My fears were fully alive again. The battles it seemed I had won were again in full rage. My husband, in your irritable impatience and anger, you told me to my face that our son, my Kamsi, was worthless to you. You said he was abnormal. You said that our daughter, my Amanda, was a girl and that you had no need for a girl child because she would someday be married off. I remember, in pain, that you didn’t attend Amanda’s christening because you were upset with me. You told me your mother was more important to you than “THESE THINGS” I brought to your house. You were referring to our children, were you not? “THESE THINGS”.
My heart bled. I wept bitterly. Then I quickly calmed my fears by telling myself that you were under a lot of stress at work and that you were also probably reacting to all the money that you had spent on my treatments. Surely, all that was getting to you? Even when you threatened me with a knife, twice you did that, I still felt unworthy of you and very deserving of your hatred. Even when you would say: “I will kill you and nothing will happen because you have no one to fight for you”, I kept on struggling to get you to love me because, Kevin, your validation was important to me
You had refused to give me money for my medical trip to London. I knew then it was because you had your hands full with caring and catering for everybody who was dear to you. Your finances were stretched. I thought then that in time you would come around.
My health continued to get worse. Eventually, I made it to London. After extensive consultations and tests, I was given a definitive diagnosis. My condition was life threatening. It was from this time, when it was clear that I required surgery to save me life that I came face to face with a different kind of war from our home.
Kevin, you stopped speaking with me. I was in pain, in anguish and in tears. I didn’t understand what was happening. I had stayed three weeks in London and Kevin, you never called, sent a text or inquired how I was faring. You stopped taking my calls. Instead I got a call from my cousin in whose care I had left my children. She was frantic with worry because there was no food in the house for the children to eat; Kevin you had refused to provide food for our children. Kevin, you had also refused to pay for Kamsi’s home schooling.
Then Kevin, I received that e-mail from you. The only communication from you for the entire period I was in London.
Do you remember? It was an angry email. You berated me for putting your integrity at stake at your work place. Apparently your employers had called a hospital in London to inquire about me and were told that no one by my name was ever their patient. I later found out that you had given the wrong hospital name to your employers. Do you remember, Kevin?
For the first time in my 12 year marriage, the alarm bells in my head began to sound real. For the first time in 12 years, I felt real anger stir up in my heart. Kevin, I was angry because you paid no heed to the hospital where your wife was at in London. You had no clue and cared little about what I was going through. Yet you would berate me for putting your INTEGRITY at work at stake. Your integrity was your primary concern, not my health.
Then it hit me! All these years I was trying to be all I could be for you, Kevin, to make you happy, to please you, Kevin, ……… you actually hated me. You didn’t want me in your life. The signs were all there. Your family had showed me from day one that they didn’t want me. I was the object of a hatred that I could not explain. I
couldn’t understand why.
Then I saw the hand writing on the wall, all those many things that went on. You even sold my car whilst I was still lying on a hospital bed in London, with no word to me. I was not to learn of what you had done until I returned to Nigeria. The doctors had allowed me to return to prepare for surgery.
Kevin, do you remember that on my return I gave you a pair of shoes I had bought for you? Kevin, my husband, do you remember hurling those shoes at me? Kevin, do you remember me breaking down in tears? Kevin, do you remember me asking you that night, many times over, why you hated me so much, what I had done to make you hate me as much as you did?
“You are disturbing me, and if you continue, I`ll move out and inform the company that I no longer live in the house. Then they will come and drive you away”. Kevin, my husband, that was your response to me. Did you know then I only had days to live? Is that why you told me that would be the last time I would see you physically? Did you know it would only be a few more hours?
I still had a surgery to go through. Kevin, since you wanted no part in it, I had contacted the medical officer in your company directly for referrals. I left Eket for Lagos on Saturday. That same day I consulted with the specialist surgeon and surgery was scheduled for Monday morning.
In those final hours, as I prepared for my surgery, I was alone, my spirit was broken. I had lost all the fight in me. Kevin, I knew that nothing I did or said would turn you heart toward me, and I had nobody for whom you had any regards who would speak up for me.
In those final hours, Kevin, I called you. This was Sunday morning, less than 24 hours to my death. Do you remember, Kevin? I called you to share what the specialist surgeon had said. I was still shaking from your screams on the phone when I got in here. You did not want me to bother you, you screamed. I should go to my brothers and sisters, you screamed. I should pay you back all the money you gave me for my treatment in London, you screamed. Kevin, did you know that would be my last conversation with you? My last conversation with you, my husband, my love, my life, ended with you banging the phone on me.
Recalling the abusive words, the spitting, the beating, the bruising, the knifing, and the promise that I would not live long for daring to forget to buy garden eggs for your mother, an insult you vowed I would pay for with my life ……., I knew then it was over for me. There was no rationalizing needed any longer. Even the blind could see ………. You did not want me in your life.
I went in for surgery on Monday morning, February 27, 2012, and after battling for several hours, I yielded my spirit.
Kevin, my husband, I lived my promise to God. The promise I made on the day I wedded you.
For better ………………………… For worse
For richer …………………………. For poorer
In Sickness ………………………. And in health
To love ………………………….. And to cherish
Till DEATH US DO PART!
And it has.
NOW I AM DEAD!!!!!!!
Just as your mum predicted ….. Her cold words follow me to morgue. She swore to me that I would leave her son’s house dead or alive. I couldn’t leave whilst I still breathed. It had to be through death, and death it has become.
Kevin, you are FREE! And, so am I.
Your freedom is temporary. Mine is eternal.
Whilst you still have freedom, remember Kamsi and Chimamanda.
Lovingly yours until death,
Ogo.
I am gone. Gone forever. But if one woman, just one woman will learn from my story, then maybe I would not have gone in vain.
My heart weeps for my children, my mummy, my sisters and my brothers, my extended family. These ones, I was a gift to. These ones, they loved me. These ones, they wanted me. These ones, they needed me. These ones, they wish I had spoken out earlier.
***
Written by someone who was part of her life and witnessed her struggles. RIP Ogo.
656 comments:
1 – 200 of 656 Newer› Newest»This must be the lady Stella Damascus wrote an article about.
Kevin, may the Lord judge you and your family and every other Man that is like you. The judgement would be very bitter!! Wicked men like you have no place in the society.
Lord please rest this woman's soul and keep the children.
Jesus! Where do I start? What a heart-wrenching story! I am at a loss for words...
I am in tears, how could a man put his wife through so much pain? Nigerian men are becoming something else oo, its sad, so sad. May her soul RIP.
VERY NICELY WRITTEN, HOWEVER COULD SHE REALLY HAVE WRITTEN THIS???? I AM SO HARD PRESSED TO BELIEVE SHE DID...EVEN IF SOMEONE DID ON HER BEHALF..THE MESSAGE IS VERY CHILLING...A LOT OF WOMEN IN NIGERIA WILL DO ANYTHING TO STAY MARRIED EVEN WHEN THE HANDWRITING ON THE WALL IS GLARING AND TELLING THEM TO RUN FOR DEAR LIFE!!! BEAUTIFUL PRECIOUS LADY NWANYI IBEM!! MAY YOUR SOUL REST IN PEACE..
AS FOR INLAWS DO NOT GIVE THEM ANY WIGGLE ROOM..KEEP THEM AT ARMS LENGTH!!!!
Oh dear, Kevin is cursed for LIFE!!!!
RIP Ogo. You should have gone to your family for help. Dis is just too Sad sad sad sad just too sad:((((((
Waoh!!! Such a touchy letter! What a wicked world and wicked family. But you saw all this hand writing on the waLl and you still continued with the marriage, now see where it has led you to?? I weep for you
Nawa o!
This was just unfair...may her soul RIP
oh my God, i cant control ds tears....
ok i can barely see to type..
ds is deep! kevin..no doubt u are a beast, a devil incarnate, a heartless soul. God will punish u and ur family beyond ur imagination
a woman loves u unconditionally n u send her to her grave???
u and ur family will never find peace. those children u call THESE THINGS will become someebody tmrw n they will spit at u. u will eat all ur words back.
rip in Ogor! a beautiful woman with a beautiful soul, rest in the bossom of the lord
ds is the most touching piece ive ever read
Wow... Wow...
God have mercy... Just so speechless.... Wow...
Linda...........why are some in laws soooo wicked?
Am igbo but some in laws are sooo wicked
No woman deserves to go through this.
It shall be well
Too sad. I felt it in my heart. Still do. Marriage isn't a milestone for all. It must not be the next step.
kevin u r a fucking piece of shit.
u r cursed this day! no woman will ever love u like ogor did. any woman u find will turn out to be a jezebel to u n ur household; to torment u all. useless family.
This is eerie and sad!
It hurts to know that men get away with their philandering ways every time.
A beautiful woman is gone... RIP.
What a sad story.
I am sure the sad case that is Kevin has probably remarried his next victim.
Nigerian women need to wake up.
No amount of stress warrants anyone to treat her the way he did, even when she was dying?
Are you serious?
So sad how men are allowed to get away with such downright despicable evil acts.
I hope her ghost taunts him for the rest of his life.
Such an upsetting story.
Whoever wrote this story must have been really close to her, so why didn't he/she try to save her from herself??..not that it would have helped anyway, She probably would have turned against the person for trying to "break up her home," A sham of a home.
*sigh*
May she rest in peace & I hope her kids are in great hands.
this is sorrowful.she made her decision to stay and die for the man she loved.me, i cant do wat she did o! abeg,make urself happy bfore trying to make someone else happy.its not by force...
we can only cry for her,shes gone,meanwhile her husband is free to remarry.
we should learn from this experience
im swimming in tears right now...JEEZ!!!!
what a touching piece...may her soul RIP.I also hope many women will learn from her story.
heart breaking story,men can b beast
SPEECHLESS!!!!:(((((((((((((((((
Wow.
my parents broke up wen i was just 4 years old.
n since then av always wondered wat it is that suddenly changes two people that used to sooo love each other.
dat suddenly turns them into bitter enemies that one of them doesnt even care if the other lives or dies.
So at a very young age, av learnt to love someone else AS YOURSELF.
NEVER, NEVER LOVE ANY MAN, WOMAN MORE THAN YOU LOVE YOURSELF!!
if you are in a rship, marriage that is depressing you, pleaseeeee leave.
You chose to cum into the relationship, you CAN STILL choose to leave!!
Ogochukwu is dead today.imagine she had decided to walk away sooner than now. she would still b here wt us!
Sad story really.
www.LailaIkeji.com
All of you women that run after rich boys! This is an eye opener o! Most of these rich guys have no good foundation hence,they behave as EVIL as possible! It is SAD! I'm not emotional about this as much as I'm almost teary BUT again, all these money magnet guys are mostly heartless,especially the igbo boys! Not to say yoruba and hausa peeps are any better! Let's call a spade a spade jo! Rubbish!!!! #let every woman be careful to always go for the least likely guy who has some good Godly principles and Kind approach to life! #kapish!!! Mschiieeeewwwwww! Wicked world!
Linda, I'm in my 30s n a single mother. I am very afraid of getting married cos of d experiences I had with my baby's father, who I was never even married to. I'm eternally grateful to God I didn't marry him...I went thru hell. Reading this story brought back memories...I can't stop tears from flowing cos I can relate with almost every torture Ogo suffered. Iv enjoyed peace as a single mother, raising my child and the fear of loosing this peace to marriage is so heavy I can't even explain it to my family, who can't wait for me to 'settle down'
wow this is seriously touching
pleas learn from this story women and men
rip Ogo
Very touching! I shed tears while reading this! We women need to speak out against any form of abuse whether mental,physical! May her soul RIP n giv her parents the fortitude to bear the loss n may her children grow old in good health! Very sad
Linda i don't get u.u said d dead woman wrote frm d grave then in conclusion u said written by someone u witnessed everything....why d confusion.if d dead wrote,how was it delivered?
I went thru a similar experience and reading this story feels like am reading my story but i thank God that i got out and am alive to tell my own story. What women go thru in the name of marriage!!! RIP Ogo, RIP.
RIP, this is way too sad...May God protect your children
Sometimes I wonder wats d craze about getting married? Some men are just devil's incarnate. All they do is deceive u into loving them and then like mirror they Shatter all those dreams and aspiration. Imagine her fighting for a man dat isn't even worth d sole of her shoes. RIP ma'am
Dis is touchin..I pray God grant her eternal rest in heaven. She suffered 2 much just 2 please her 'selfish' husband, he's a living beast. Dat wicked kelvin of a man wil suffer rejection and his case wil b worst X 10.
I don't understand why she was trying to make him happy all those years at the expense of her own happiness. That will never make sense to me.
People need to understand marriage/relationship is not a do or die affair; there are always signs that a man is not that into you and being the monster that the fool she married is he decided to take the piss beyond imagination.
Women need to learn how to not strictly depend on a man for shit. Make something of yourself and make yourself happy first. Like they say at the place I interned: Health, family, work..it should all be given the highest attention in that order!
Make yourself happy and work hard for your money so that no stupid man will come and be pissing in your garri on top who died..HISS! Like my mom says to me, if you die because of one man, the amount of women that will take your place ehn, u gan u wont believe it.
Very sad situation, RIP miss Lady
Speechless.RIP Ogo.
This was just unfair...may her soul RIP
Dis is so touching i cried God help us women o
This is so painful and some women are going through this same thing presently. Nigerian women should realise when to leave a marriage to avoid terrible consequences like this.its not a must u must stay married, even when your life is at stake. we have been hearing so many killings by people's spouse. Pls a word is enough for the wise. its better you live to fight tomorrow than die and lose the fight. May your soul rest in peace Ogoo.
amazing writing..speechless by dis story...love can me amazingly sweet and amazingly foolish and blinding..
And that is why i will never marry a nigerian man. them and their wahala is too much. all because we women refuse to hold them accountable and refuse to teach our daughters that they deserve better. all we do is further preach the mentality that you are worthless without that MRS in front of your name. sad. RIP Ogo!
speechless...i m still crying.My ex broke up with me cos his mother and sisters said that my family is nt rich. I cried but after reading this,i now know that it was a blessing in disguise.they would ve made my life miserable.
I pray that God in heaven makes kevin meet a woman that will show him&his family pepper..A woman that will send kevin's mum,d stupid sista in law(women r jus their own's worst enemy) to their early grave.
It is chilling to think things like this happen in real life,I hope she makes heaven oh cos earth was hell already.Thank God for the internet&LIB,these things aren't new.it's just that we are just gettin to hear about them now
Hope her mum goes to take her kids from d guy so Ogo won't turn in her grave cos d kevin is obviously d devil
My comment is so disoriented cos dis article jus confused me
Omg! i cant stop crying.....i don't get it, where were her family when she was going thru all this? why didnt they take her away. Kevin, God has already punished u, u will never know peace!
I don't know what to say because I don't know how to rain curses on people. but I have learnt a lot from this post.
It is high time Naija women learn or realise that they don't need their husbands' validation to live a happy life. Why do u have to trade life for love? This is just too pathetic. Sinners will not do unpunished but the damage is not redeemable. May her soul rest in peace.
OMG, I'm crying. I had to trace her to facebook, she was so beautiful...
RIP OGO. EVERY MAN SHOULD KNOW THAT IN MARRIAGE YOUR WIFE COMES FIRST BEFORE YOUR MOTHER. MEN LOVE YOUR WIVES, MAKE THEM YOUR PRIORITY.
Kevin's facebook
https://www.facebook.com/people/Kevin-Onuchukwu/100000439055308?sk=wall
His company
Eng. Onuchukwu E. Kevin,
Facilities Engineer, Field Operations Technical,
Mobil Producing Nigeria Unlimited, Eket, Nigeria.
No words, none at all...
WOW.....Rest in Peace Ogo! God will take care of their your kids. Love really isn't enough for marriage! Today I was going on about my age and marriage, and my friend asked me if I knew how miserable sm ladies are in their marriages??? Reading this story, makes you scared of the uncertainties in marriages.
May God help us all...Taichi
i am in tears kip wondering why she have to suffer a lot just to stay married. d hubby must be under some motherly luv charm.
May her soul rest in peace. Being a christian, I don't blame her for staying. She made a solemn vow "for better for worse". As for kelvin and his family, I hope u all no about karma. They might not bear d same fate wit his late wife, but they will carry grief 100 times greater. And as for d silly sister inlaw dat will not face her own marriage... Only God can safe u all. Wicked world! God have mercy on our souls
Crying..shocking piece.greater luv has no woman given †Æ ̴̴͡ a man befor.ǦØD̶̲̥̅̊ remains the final jugde.RIP ogo
Wicked inlawas are restricted to any tribe...its an indivual thing..it could be from any tribe...nollywood has just made it seem like its a igbo inlaw thinny
This is very sad.
RIP Ogo. May God almighty grant you eternal rest and be with your children.
For every women going through any form of domestic violence, Please please and please voice out before your death puts your family through tears and agony.
The things Nigerian women do to get and stay married. It's a sad story and all I can say is may her soul rest in peace.
For Kevin and his family, I have no opinion. God is the ultimate judge.
I hope her children will be taken care of by her family. I wish them all the best in life. God bless them.
R.I.P. Ogo,this is so sad...I pray ur children Kamsi n Amanda r well taking care of as 4 kevin n his family u will surely reap wah u sow....:(
Women need to speak out. SPEAK OUT biko nu. Forget about till death do us part. If the situation you're in is life threatening....RUN and don't look back. Sometimes we confuse lust for love! And sometimes Satan gets in the way of Gods work. I hope Kevin has read this letter. I hope he has learnt his lesson. And I sure hope he will be there for his kids. RIP Ogo. You are FREE!
~ Menakaya's Baby.
Short of Words......May she RIP.
Wow dis tears are damn hot! Linda yeah u got me there.Couldn't help buh spill...ma tears are so hot dat ma face hurts now.Well such is life.Ma mum prepared me 4 dis and told me neva expect anyfin guud outta dis wicked world.Can't even type anymore as ma fingers are shaking.
This is the saddest story ever.......May God be the judge...... In-laws in Nigeria dia own don too much oo....
I am, the no Sender.
Even as a man, couldn't help the sadness and gloom that this story brought. This is so so not it.
Linda I apologise for accusing you earlier that you give us fictitious stories on this blog. This story about late Ogo humbles me. You just know that this is real, it happened.
Men, Nigerian men, guys are we as bad as this Kevin? Is our soul so darkened as not to allow a stray of light peneterate? Can the devil really turn some of our souls to a veritable workshop of evil like this?
Oh women how some of you suffer and swallow all manner of insolence, humiliation and degradation and for what? Eh Ogo, for what? For what is this death to be gained?
Oh God deliver the millions of women terribly wallowing in unthankful and loveless relationships, where the soul has been long dead only waiting for the body to catch on.
Ladies out there, believe me, non of us men is deserving of your martyrship. No man is worthy of your tears shed out of abject pain, hate and abuse. Not even your children should make you stay in such a relationship.
Once you start noticing the signs begin to speak out. Get as many persons as you can to intervene. Do not, I repeat do not keep quiet. No need to suffer in silence. Most who did are for ever keeping their peace six feet under. Run, run as far as your legs can carry you away from such evil.
Ogo, it is not all lost. Vengeance belongs to God. He will revenge on your behalf. May he preserve Kamsi and Amanda. The stone the builder rejected has become the chief cornerstone. Your will be the chief cornerstones in your husband's home.
I'm even so angry now. Somebody shld get the husbands picture and put it up. Bfor he goes and marry anoda innocent girl and den make her life miserable too.let everybody see his face. Nonsense animal of a man. He is even less than a man. Less dan human.
Staying in a loveless marriage where you are being abused in everyway has nothing to do with christianity. Divorce is allowed in such a case in every religion I know of.
Wen I say I am a HUGE HUGE fan of divorce pple hate me.Imagine all wat dis beautiful woman had 2 go tru all in d name of some stupid marriage,now her family nd innocent kids are @ a big big loss her mother's life wuld neva b d same again.Women pls try 2 summon courage 2 walk out of dat abusive relationship or marriage.Now Mr kelvin is feeling funky on d street of Lagos wit anoda woman I can bet nd She is has bin sent 2 an early grave,am so so bitter right now.I jst hope we Ladies both married nd unmarried would learn frm dis cuz in d tru sense I fink marriage is over rated(pls Ms Linda I wuld be glad if publish dis)Tnks
I wish I can form words to explain how I feel but can't get my head in it.. May her soul rest in peace.
Thanks for sharing
xxx
This is the saddest story ever.......May God be the judge...... In-laws in Nigeria dia own don too much oo....
From the woman's story, we realize that her family lived at Eket, where her husband (if we can call him that) must have worked for no other company than ExxonMobil.
Its a pity one cannot institute any conclusive legal action against the nit-wit.
He should have been there for her.
Dis is so touching i cried God help us women o
http://www.facebook.com/OgochukwuOnuchukwu
wat a touching story>>> i wish my mom will read this..sometin similar has been going on in my family... we are 7, 5 boys 2 girls with me da oldest am 23 now..my dad's family do not like my mom..for the last 23 years she has been making excuses for him.. he use2 be worst he beats her and any of my mom's family members dat comes around 2 help so my mom @ a point stopped running 2 her family..he is neva accomodating of ma mom's family whom i love more than hiz..and as a kid i watched all this happen..my grandma snaps at any lil fin she says or does..she hits maltreats beats my mom one day wen my mom travelled during december time..dey beat her up as last as 2am and threw her out with us and my dad said nofin..my dads late younger sister was living wit us one time..and she poisoned all of us(da kids and my mom) we were in da hospital for 1year and had 92 injecttions drips and surviving on oxygen.. my dad will rather spend money for and on outsiders dan we his kids or even his wife let alone ma mom's family ..in ma 23 yrs ive only seen my dad buy ma mom a gift ones..and am sure he gt it for his numerous girl friends and dey rejected it den he brought it home 4 ma mom..he even went as far as dating my mom's friend and she will cook and bring 2 da house for him..then we grew older even tho hiz stopped hiting her.. respect is wat he doesnt ve 4 her..hiz very selfish..ma mom will b sick he wnt care..wen ma mom had ma last bro he didnt even border 2 cum 2 da hospital reasons being OH SHE HAD ANOTHER BOY AGAIN..like seriously how lame and stupid is dat..but she my mom..keeps making excuses for him..@ da site of his smile my mom can clear all da money in her bank account for him..yes did i forget my mom has always been da bread winner..wit all his numerous business he neva feeds us or pays our schul fees...now am old enough i help ma mom pay for ma younger ones..all ma mom's landed properties..he messed up everytin ..a few months ago he asked for a divorce my mom didnt accept and now shez still managing..and still hoping he'll change..i culdnt stand it all i left home wen i was 17yrs for da UK.. and plus i needed 2 help ma mom out .. I dnt tink il eva be stupid enuf 2 marry a man like my dad or even make excuses 4 him..now i gt a lil right, i and my brodas who are also in da university 3 of dem try as much as we can 2 protect my mom.. I WILL ADVICE WOMEN TO READ DA SIGNS AND HAND WRITING ON THE WALL..DNT CALL IT A BLUFF..ITS GOD GIVING U THOSE SIGNS TELLING U 2 GO BEFORE IT BCOMES 2 LATE..PLZ LETS STOP ALLOWING DIS MEN WALK ALL OVER US THE WAY DEY DO.. LEAVE BF "HAD I KNOWN" BECOMES THE TITLE OF UR OWN STORY
this is so sad. may her soul rest in peace
Sounds like a home video
wow ,was it really from the grave?Was this fiction?but to be honest,this touched my heart.
Eze
This story is disturbing, i feel fritening in my bed. jeez wat can i say.
I grew up in London & believe me all nigerian men re all d same both home n abroad. they wana eat thier cake n ve it back
Mr kevin i will not curse u cos curse is already in ur pocket. am sorry to say dis but i think ibo ppl take things too far btw thier wife n thier family, i think there shld be a bandry. ur wife is not a slave nor prostitute.
Am in my 30s n am scared to death to seltle down, all my married friends re all complaining even one of them is already planning to divorse n husband dt know after having a yr old son 2geder . pls is there any point of getting marry? am a Christian but all dis chilling story makes u wonder.
Pls women speak out or stay away from violent n bully husband.
Rip most beautiful woman ogo , god luv u more x
Im crying sooo badly here!....Oh Lord! This part hit me real hard even before clicking to read the full story....
'My mum is crying. I can see her from here. She has aged since the last time I saw her. Why does she look so old and why is she so thin? Can someone console her? Can someone make her stop crying'
Ive read this particular line bout 8x already...*crying* Smh...This is waaaaay tooo PAINFUL n very very SAD!!She's sooo BEAUTIFUL! Smh...this very painful life sometimes. *sigh*
KEVIN or whatever the hell ur name is,U'r such a FUCKING HEARTLESS UNGRATEFUL RETARD!!!Trust me,u'll have nooo peace forever on this earth!!Are u happy now?!?!?
R.I.P.P Beautiful Angel Ogo.
ONOME says.....................................
Well I read the story carefully.It is touching.May she rest in peace.I find some aspects of the story difficult to understand.
1.From inception it was obvious that your in laws did not like you
2.You and your husband allowed your husband's brother's wife to taunt you like that why?How come your husband did not defend you or refuse to tolerate such abuse directed at his wife?
3.The signs were there from scratch.The supposed barrenness showed a bit of his true colours.WHY ON EARTH DID YOU NOT WALK AWAY THEN?
4.You brought/ had children into that sort of atmosphere?
5.How close were you to your family especially your mom and your sisters that no one noticed that you were incredibly sad in your marriage?
5.Your husband/beast had repeatedly beat you and in your own admission tied you up and beat you like a common goat ,threatened you with a knife,threatened that he would kill you and no one will fight for you AND YOU STILL STAYED PUT?
6.your husband/beast had displayed hatred towards your children,children you bore after so much pain and stress and you still stayed put?
RIP Ogochukwu.My sympathies lie more with your children.THey did not ask to be born to a father who hated their mother or a mother who was too selfish and too weak to pack up and leave such an abusive relationship because she needed a serially confirmed beast to validate her existence...Kamsi and Chimamanda be strong.GOD WILL BE WITH YOU.Your stories will be those of resounding success and joy abounding.
Linda, can you give this script to Nollywood? I can't believe Nigerian people can cry. I thought people well vast in 419 have no emotions, i guess i'm wrong.
Speechless! Words fail me right now!
YOU GUYS...we need to do something about this asap! We cannot just let this dude get away with this just like that!
I HAVE SEARCHED HIGH AND LOW FOR HIS COMPANY'S BRANCH EMAIL ON GOOGLE OR PHONE NUMBER BUT ONLY COULD FIND THE PARENT COMPANY'S EMAIL. IT IS BETTER THAN NOTHING.
PLEASE LETS ALL WRITE EXXON MOBILE AND TELL THEM WHAT WE THINK, COS THIS ANIMAL DOES NOT DESERVE THE PLEASURES HE IS ENJOYING NOW.
BELOW ARE HIS DETAILS AND THE LINK TO THE EMAIL FORM! (THANKS ADA FOR THE INFO)
His company:
Eng. Onuchukwu E. Kevin,
Facilities Engineer, Field Operations Technical,
Mobil Producing Nigeria Unlimited, Eket, Nigeria.
EXXON MOBILE'S EMAIL FORM: http://www.exxonmobil.com/imports/contactus/contactus_contact.aspx
FOR THOSE OF U IN THE US WHO WANTS TO WRITE THEM INSTEAD:
Exxon Mobil Corporation
Attn: Customer Relations
Box 1049
Buffalo, New York
14240-1049
How did she manage to write her death story up to the point of death? Something doesn't add up. I sympathise with her but I'm also wary of people who write stories this long and never indicated they were partly responsible for whatever happens to them.
I had a breakup with a girl a while back who was physically and verbally abusive to me in our 2 yr relationship. When we finally broke up she painted an holier than thou story on how she was innocent. Those who knew the real deal were shocked at the story she painted to the outside world even though she was evil personified.
For this dead lady, may she rest in peace! Did she respect her husband? Did she irritate him with her behaviour? Was she a stubborn person? Was she disrespectful to him? Was she wasteful? Did she cheat on him? ?????
I find it hard to believe she was 100% innocent.
We need more women mentors and women empowerment seminars.I think some women do not know what to do.I tend to be in a limbo sometimes but the support I get from my friends help me through my storms.We are not "Super Women" and we need to scream for help when we need it.We need to first love the lord and then love each other.There are too many misconceptions about the woman's role in the Nigerian Society.I get so overwhelmed and really sad when I read stories like this.I am attending the daystar women's conference and i think we can be our sister's keepers.I keep thinking that Ogo might have lived a more fulfilling life if she had a "Band Of Sisters"at her beck and call for tremendous support.As women when we get the resources we need we make a big difference in our lives....see you at the conference,I'd be wearing my Band of sisters T-shirt to give big hugs and a warm hello...FYI...the conference is free...http://daystarng.org/
Dear Linda, i am not married cos i promised my God that and my self that i WILL ETERNALLY LOVE MY WIFE. i had to pee before commenting, Linda, i cant speak. but may God judge us all. Dear Future Wife, i promise on my life, to Love and Protect you, with this life of Mine and the One after, till none is remaining
May her her soul rest in peace. May you rest in the Lord. I hope someone is taking care of your children especially your first son.
As for Kevin, the consequences are natural.. his life is about to start unfolding. Linda make you updates us enquiringly minds.
Ladies, please learn not to take abuse from any body. Same goes for men too. PEACE out
VERY SAD STORY. MAY HER SOUL RIP. AMEN!!!!
LINDA, I'M SEEING A NEW IKEJI AROUND IS SHE UR SISTER?
Pple push you to see how far they can go with you ,if you stop early,they just know you wont take shit
This story brought me to tears! Why do women put themselves through this all in the name of being married? Why? NO MAN DESERVES YOU PUTTING YOURSELF THROUGH THIS! NO MAN! Women plssssssss your life and happiness is too important to allow any man subject you to forgoing your happiness to please him! a relationship is a two way street! Its better to walk out of the relationship/marriage than stay and be miserable! This is truly a lesson to women out there! If only we would listen...Linda please take note about this because your constant comments about wanting a husband is getting annoying! Marriage is not by force oh! Look before you leap! Better to be single than be in a miserable marriage!
It's so unfortunate that some people just remain perpetually stuck to all these monsters in human form ,even when their precious, beautiful lives are being threatened.
I pity her mother and children,as they are the ones who have voids that can never be filled by anyone again.
As for the bastard and monster Kevin,you are obviously
one of those illiterate,local,half baked fools who can't see beyond their noses.Your
Family members,out of greed have obviously brainwashed you with the help of some dibias, who have converted your brain to cotton wool,so they can manipulate you for their selfish interests.
You have murdered sleep and you will sleep no
more.You will face torment from all angles throughout the remaining days of your useless,empty life and your mother and family will weep over you too.
Linda,thanks and please continue to use this medium to
give strength to women who are being abused,so that ultimately,it will inspire and strengthen people to cry out and run for their lives and preserve that wonderful gift from God! cos Life is Beautiful.
I am igbo and i agree that a lot of ibo inlaws are evil cos they always say that when you marry a man you also marry the entire family,well thats a fact,its just left for the woman to protect herself and know when to fight back.dont enter marraige with goodytooshoes attitude especially when you r unsure of the man.from day 1 make the man know sef say you get hot temper,be unpredictable,dont make him know you like him too much until he has earned it,over years of course
Iam speechless...MAy her soul RIP..Karma would hit that Kevin...God is in control...
It is sad that we have to resort to this attitude to marraige,i am a woman and a firm believer in love and happily ever after cos my parents had one but ladies, ladies pls dont try to prove your man that you can love him better than anyone,unless he deserves it,put yourself and kids first,never go an extra mile for a man that doesnt desrve it,dont starve yourself to give him food in the name of marraige,like i always say to my husband,dont do things to me that you wouldt do to your sister?
May you continue to find Peace in the Lord!...may his guidance and protection ever be on your children Amen..
Dis is d most heart wrenchn story ever.ds is real pple. Doe d person I knw aint dead n sick bt goin thru a lot.n I hv vowed to do all 2 mk her happy n ma lil sis. U all hv 2 bilv dt dis tins hapn.not an igbo tin as am yoruba n witnessed it all.kelvin,jus knw ur a. Lifeless body walkn n u all will die like a chicken
LOOK AT THIS BEAUTIFUL CREATION OF GOD..THE STUPID SISTER IN LAW WAS OBVIOUSLY INSANELY JEALOUS OF HER!!!..SHE MARRIED INTO A FAMILY OF LOSERS, AND LOW LIVES, WITH NO SELF ESTEEM...WOMEN WHEN PPL ARE DUMPING ON YOU IT STEMS PURELY FROM UNADULTERATED JEALOUSY!!!..IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU...I HOPE HER SPIRIT TORMENTS THE INLAWS FROM HER GRAVE...THE EVIL NE'ER DO WELLS THAT THEY ARE!!! AND MAY GOD BE THE FATHER AND MOTHER OF THOSE CHILDREN, AND MAY THEY HAVE A GREAT LIFE!! AMEN!!!!
:(
d most painful thing of these Men (Bastards lyk dz) lyk dz still exist
For beta For worse yet wen u don't birth to a child/have a male child u'r considered worthless
and these got mi tinkin B4.wer'z d love huh?
Ladies b4 u gt married pray oooh and afta marriage
love b4 marriage afta marriage hatred.
itz still happening both among the rich and poor alike :'( WHY DZ INJUSTICE?? ehnn.. awon guys e damilohun ?
most women who bear it wen asked they tell u there staying all 'cos of der children &
For better ………………………… For worse
For richer …………………………. For poorer
In Sickness ………………………. And in health
To love ………………………….. And to cherish
*smh*
The whole boy-child preference in nig..*freaks mi out
Guys no b woman born una? why d boy-child preference doesn't exists in da western world *smh*
so heartbreaking. may her soul rest in peace.
Sad, very sad but has anyone heard his side of the story?
OMG!
as a man, this has really touched me and am ashamed for all men!
Am blessed with a wife and a boy, God has done it for me so i will never knw how Kevin felt but as a human being lets all recognise that God giveth to whomever he wills, the purpose of marriage is not all about procreation. Your soul will definitely RIP.
Linda, you just made me cry. I mean, really CRY! God rest her loving soul!
@Anon 11:22.. pls can u kindly shut up! if u dnt hve anythng meaninfful 2 say.. which one is rich man, poor man or anythng with tribe in dis case nw?? dd u read dat in d article.. I feel very insulted dat u would say dat. First of all my father is an igbo man who adores my mother and all his children.. For ur info my mother's first marriage ws 2 a yoruba man dat beat her almost 2 d point of death... yet do u see me assuming dat yoruba men are bad! I really hope u are above d age of 12! becos u hve a whole lot of growing up 2 do! Anyway.. bck 2 dis story.. D morale of dis is dat WOMEN YOU NEED TO KNOW YOUR SELF WORTH!!! Don't ever let pple not just men, determine hw u perceive urself.. We cn't alwaez pick'em right n when u dn't, you know dat u must get out of such a relationship immediately n never look back.. becos NOBODY is worth it.. not evn you father or mother or HUSBAND! Sad story.. wish it turned out better 4 her, i'm puttn those little children in prayers..
rather sad
wicked man
http://butinformat.wordpress.com
I think a Picture of the devils right hand man (Kevin)shld b posted evrywhere possible, cos iv bn searchn 4 d bastards picture. It shld b on fbook, twitter, bbm, evn whatsapp. So dt ppl cn b aware that such a monster exists, nd they stay away. Gone r d days wr we throw stones, cs I swear he deserves 2 b stoned 2 death. Wahs so painful is hw beautiful she is....My God! Dt precious job he hs dt made hm fl lyk a king, nd demand 4 hs cash, first he must lose it nd we mst mk sure dt Kevin bcms unemployable. I hope her kids r in safe hands nd her soul is wt d almighty..........
Ppl pls #OPERATIONDESTROYKEVINSIMAGE
Pics pics pics!!!!
Iknow the lady very well we went to school together. i am not surprised she stayed. she is one gentle and quiet girl and intelligent too. she was a pharmacist
Linda can you go to this link
https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=196216413814716&set=a.196204520482572.27610.196164993819858&type=3&theater
that's the picture of the kevin on the left... please can you put the picture on blast so women can know this man and be weary of him!
I can't stop crying. May God in Heaven judge accordingly. Rest In Peace beautiful lady and God will surely take care of your innocent children, IJMN- AMEN.
Ds is pathetic!!!is any man worth dying fr?is marriage a do or die?May GOd grant her eternal rest
It pains me whenever I see a married woman taking the blame and suffering for a situation that is no fault of her. For how long will 'literate' men continue to reason like 'illiterates'? It is disheartening to learn that someone who is expected to be well-informed on a very sensitive issue such as gender discrimination is found to be a protagonist of the act
I felt sad, tears wanted to come, but i rstrained it why?
my lady and to all other ladies pls marriage is not a do or die affair, when i say this in the presence of my ummarried friends, they go, 'is it because u r married' and i'v told them countless times without apologies that the only woman that wl suffer after a separation from a man is d one without a job to feed herself, and i always remind my own husband when he starts wt his madness that 'only one silly mistake from u and this marriage is over' HA he knows, i dont v a single regard for a man who thinks he's doing a woman a big favor marrying her, NO u r not - listen to me dumbskull - d same pain ur mother went thru to have u is the same pain my own mother went thru to have me, I remind my own if u r tired i'll move on.
marriage is over-rated all over d world, not only n Nigeria but i always tell my girlfriends, if separation or divorce wl give u joy and peace of mind that u desire - pls go for it, i'll forever adore MoAbudu, when marriage was not smiling anymore she moved on and am sure she's better than when she was married, i dont know what happened in her marriage but her 40yrs pix i saw, she didnt look like a fulfilled woman, look @ that woman today - she's FREE, HAPPY, INDUSTRIOUS, CONNECTED and above all RICH and hopefully she knows GOD too.
so my dear ladies, keep ur heads high, get a job, do something for ur self, if he's giving u heartache pls move out and start afresh and sometimes i dont like d way my Ibo people treat their daughter-in-laws, pls u all remember we r all going 6ft someday, some mother in laws r too wicked to call mothers, only if i know if they get presents in their meeting for being wicked mother in laws.
may God console ur family, i wl not pray for u cause u r gone and definitely in a better place
an to u Kevin, may u reap all u have sowed
And to your children, God that caters for orphans (sorry i call them that, cause Kevin s a loser) will surely bless them, care for them, and take them to higher heights
and to all other ladies going thru this or something similar, pls pack ur bags and leave, God knows if my husband hit me once, he wl not meet me n that house again.
marriage is not a do or die affair o, live and let live and if u think otherwise(men), i beg hold ur marriage, i wl sell everything that connects u to me and even ur sorry wedding rings and start a life again I swear
May God protect us all from becoming that which we dread...
May the soul of Ogo and the souls of all the faithful departed through the mercy of God, rest in peace.
As for Kevin, may the almighty God bless you...
What has this world come to?
Basic human rights should mean something to fellow humans.
Kevin GOD 'll pay u back according to ur own deeds,I pray dat ur kids 'll leave to b somebody in life.As for ur mother how long does she hve to leave on dis earth.ogo may ur soul rest in peace.GOD 'll fight ur battle.
Dis Is painful,just like M̶̲̅ε̲̣̣̣̥ ,i ve never witness peace since i was born till date ma dad beats ma mum,all the time,hates her S̶̲̥̅Æ ̴̴̴̴̴̴͡ much n has tried killing her,she still beleives GOD wld cum to her aid,I'm I̶̲̥̅̊n̶̲̥̅̊ tears bt stRong still.one thg for sure is scared of getting married cos of this shit,i pray GOD guides us frm evil men
*shaking my head*Yes which means the knows what she would have written in her grave(her thoughts exactly) knowing how close they were. Roger that?
marriage is not a do or die affair , pls ladies dont believe in for better for worst, if its not working pls quit
This is really deep,may her beautiful soul rest in peace.As for Kevin,i wish i know you,lemme come kick your frigging ass.
That's just d title. Her close friend wrote d story just as Ogo would have wanted!
God help us...
It's not all about we men u know... There are the mother and sister -in-law, these people are women who control from behind.
Just cuz this happened to Ogo doesn't mean there's not a man who can sacrifise his life for his wife... Luck wasn't just on her side. She sacrifised more than she should.
May her soul rest in peace.
And may God guide us.
I don't know what this world is turn into... Nuff said
I fear too...all that story about how it came from the grave and all....and I am just reading all the comments and wondering if I am the confused one....
Kevin, Ogo's blood is crying out. Bewarned!!
Wow!! So heart breaking.
what has happened has happened, GOD knows the best. any good or bad works we do, GOD will judge.
Painful, sad and annoying, some ladies experience dis kinda stuff in a relationship and they still go ahead to marry,IT'S NOT WORTH IT......please let's learn, it's better to stay alive single and happy than to die married and sad........Thank God for giving me that wisdom, any guy who starts to show signs of stupidity in a relationship, This girl here humbly takes a BOW.
Wow....
RIP OGO...........
I always tell my sisters and some of my friends who are desperate to get married, never look at anyone or anything to validate you. I pity her but I dont feel sorry for her cos the handwriting was right there from the beginning. hence for the ladies always make sure that the man loves you more than u love him. sometimes it is us women that causes these things, I rmbr a friend of mine, she was in this mental abuse relationship, we were kept advising her to get out but she stayed bcos she wanted to get married at the end the guy dumped her and broke her heart
RIP Ogo you will not die in vain, this is a lesson to all women that men are ok in the head. The ibo's are the worse of all, the Yoruba's are not good as well. Women we don't need this shit from this men, I have damned them all and in laws as well, mylife and children come first, I think God as seen that me made a mistake for creating men first that he has made women so strong and independent now. The saying God made man according to his image I'm sure he meant women cos if Kevin is of God's image hey I want to see what His God looks like.
Women pls wake up from the slumber of this stupidness called love. Use the men to have children but you don't need to marry them now.
Linda I read this at church and ppl were surprised when I started crying. This man must be dealt with. The company must have a number he must be fired. Something must be done.
I was telling my mum smthing like this yesterday. Don't stay in a marriage that would kill you. Pack and go haba. Look now and those kids will suffer,they will. What of her relatives,did they not know. Why are people this wicked. Linda something must be done nigerian women believe that being married is a title not knowing that deáth is far worse. Oh linda I am so sad and heartbroken. And I saw smthing must be done.
LIB readers we must do something
RIP OGO
I just read this story and it has left me in a sad state.Ive been crying ever since.I dont know how wicked,selfish and unfeeling some people can be.This was a woman who loved her husband unconditionally.She swallowed all the insults and bore all the pain,because of love.What did she get in return:a constant show of abuse and ingratitude.I have only one consolation:I believe she is in a better place,where there is no more suffering,but joy forever more...She did not die in vain.As for that BEAST that thinks himself human...just like the Shakespearian character Macbeth,HE HAS MURDERED SLEEP!Ogo did not die because she was sick,if she had all the love and support from her husband,She wouldve lived.Ogo died because she was tired of fighting alone,she gave up because the man who could have stood by her and prayed with her,neglected her.He allowed himself to be used as a pawn the devils hands.They say 'you dont know what youve got til its gone'...Mr. Man,you will forever have a void in your heart that can never be filled.With your own hands,you have destroyed your family.I hope you are happy.Since when did barrenness become a crime?Did she create herself?even when she had your babies,you were still ungrateful...People like you dont deserve a woman like her,thats why God took her back to heaven,so she wouldnt have to go through incessant torture from you.Congrats Mr. Man,you just won an award 'The greatest idiot'.Mtscheeeeeeeeeew!
Who is this brainless fish?The woman wrote frm d grave in a manner of speaking nt literally,u dumbo.
this is unbelievable, can this be true or did she wrote it before she died, so touching
im lost for words bit this happens a lot worldwide .........ladies please let your validation come from your Creator God.
very sad indeed and i actually shed some tears...i went through this but i guess i was lucky to have left intact...this is a very emotional piece
Oh wow tears tears n tears again!!! When a woman loves,she loves 4real. Bt unforntunately kevin didn't deserve d love may God punish him n his family xcept he doesn't drink water or hv his bath dtz d only tym dis curses frm every1 wil nt catch him n his family. RIP mam n may God watch ova ur kidz.
What an unfortunate thing for a mother to tell her child never to xpect anything good frm life.What ever happened to her?
Don't live with that notion Baby,life is full of many twists n turns,some beautiful,some nt so beautiful but i always say expect d beat frm life.And I think u shld do d same too.
Nobody deserves this,it is indeed a sad thing.But i see things like this to be frequent in this new generation.The bitches are really killing it for good women,and i don't blame men too.
What a touching story... *sobbing*
I used to think i can never cry... Me a man crying over a story? Which i don't if it is too true or false or just for entertainment purpose alone. But i know enough wickedness lies in our world. And from childhood i have learnt that all STORIES ARE TRUE. Rip.
What shall be well? A woman is in her grave. You guys need to start this it is well/shall be well story.
@BLOGLORD, what mannerless being u are!
U read a piece and u began to rant like an illeterate lion....
U dey use panadol extra for someone else' headache.
**...even d woman no curse im hubby but u**
Anyway, learn to be constructive and vengeance is for God!
She should have just walked out of the marriage. Is it by force?
Wow! Wat a scaring world!! Damn.....! Honestly... am speechless!!! May dis gentle Soul RIP!!!!!!
I'm a married woman too and my mum inlaw aint giving us any probs(yet) but i swear if anyone wants to come between me and my hubby; heeeeeeeeehhhnnnnn! I'm gonna send that person to his grave. Naija women too dey dull sha. Hoha!
Hmmm, all will be well, obviously shaken by ogo's story. Weeping now but my child is by my side, I don't want him to see me cry again, he has seen too much of my tears. I was even motivated to post a comment because of one annonymous comment who is a single parent and in her 30's, am also a single mum and in my 30's too, my child's biological dad and I, were never married, he was actually divorsed when we met, only God knows why the other woman left? He was a beast in human skin, it was by the grace of God that I did not lose the pregnancy because there were health complications that my doctor had to induce me so as to save the baby's life, and he( baby's dad) was even mad at me for allowing myself to be induced because he was hoping by his calculations that the child would share his birthday if he was left till the normal due date, too many bad memories, he still calls my number begging me to come back to him, I bet to finish what he started. Never will I go that way again.
its about time we realise that emotional abuse is a million times worse than physical abuse....
RIP May God protect your children in Jesus name
In 2012 a woman with 8 older siblings and parents should feel that she has to out herself through hell for 1 man she met for only 12 years of her life.
A grown up literate, articulate (obviously), beautiful woman will allow a man to make her life a living hell???
Should she not also bear some of the blame for making her family so sad by her death? When will Nigerian women realise that you DO NOT have to put up with this rubbish? How can you reason with a crazy husband? Why should you expect someone that is crazy to call you? Call you to say what?
What did her family, friends, church do to help her get out of the mess she found herself in? What did they do for her? Why did they let her life so miserably? Just for a "man"?
The sad thing is that 8 out of every 10 married women has been physically abused in this country. The whole instituion of marraige in Nigeria is just a bloody joke!!!!
cant believe she died this way. She was a very close fam friend. Rip Ogo! culd remember when my dad was workin effortlessly for her not to marry kevin cos of his family background but she refusd as she was blinded with love.
This made me cry. So so sad. Hope someone out there is reading and learning.
Love yourself. Hold yourself in some form of esteem. Look up to God for validation. Not man. You, yes youIn this similar situation leave today, yes today. Pack your bag and stop reasoning and rationalizing the matter. Its not a do or die affair.
When there is life there is hope. Run! Flee! Sop you can fight another day.
This may have been written by someone very close to Ogo. The person should write an autobiography of this lady's life.
May her soul RIP.
Kevin, U n ur moda will surely be judged by God. Hv nufin more 2 say 2 U, coz u r nt worth it. Ogoochukwu may ur gentle soul RIP!!!Amen
Ah God men are despirately wicked may God judge dat man in his own coin, and protect dos kids. RIP ogo
*Sobs* RIP ogo,am short of words,dis is a wicked world we live in.I knw in dat dark cold room u will find eternal love,peace nd happiness!God will look after ur kids!dis is a very sad story.
What would have happened if she did not understand Igbo language and could not understand the comments his family made the first time she met them?
It would have been a different case. My advice any Nigerian girl is to avoid marrying a Nigerian man whose family dislikes you. Do not force yourself on such a wicked family and die young.
Her family should take the custody of her children so that they will not suffer like their mother did.
In African marriages, you are not just 'marrying' the man but the entire family culturally.
God alone will judgeKevin and his family, how wicked can people be, What!!!!! Kevin and his family can't know peace, pls God take care of those children
Stupid comments like this piss me the fuck off!! So it is only sucessful men that are wife beaters....this must be comming from a frustrated man or woman hiss, somebody is dead and what u can advice is don't date sucessful men stupid comment!
God.....this is so heartbreaking but why are some men very wicked....and they are both igbo oooh. i'm dating an igbo guy now but i'm beginning to develop cold feet. RIP ogo and as for kevin may you rot in hell. mtchew
@anon Mar 24, 2012 03:33 PM thank you very much this is exactly what I have been saying I hope this shall not be in a vain, and women will start to sit up know your worth know you deserve more....JESUS did not come for you to have a life of misery to be oppressed by some cowards called men..things will only change when you stop allowing a man to brainwash you make you feel insecure, they will realise they can't carry on like this, mothers teach your sons and daughters what is right! Please let us stop being wicked step mothers, mother inlaws, they r ur children too.
KIA KIA...wicked Kevin has shut down his Facebook account. I am married and happy but God knows that if for any reason the status quo should change, I will pack my bags , baggages, ugwongwon and find my way.
Living life and being happy is very important....u can't live with a wife or husband who is a beast . Any spouse that puts his extended family before his immediate family is a fool.
Marriage is not by force. We need to learn that.
RIP my darling .... If u were my friend when u were alive I would have told u to leave the fool with your kids. What a fool....what a shame.
It did make me cry. Rest in peace Ogo
The thing a lot of women are missing is that you have a voice you can speak out, does nt mean you should be a nag, bt know your worth and what you deserve. Good GODLY men will tell you love does not beat you, abuse you mentally, cheat on you. Please let us be strong as women stand for each other, am also talking to the husband snatchers plz stop cause u are enablers of men with bad behaviours.
Really sad. Really pathetic.
The likes of Kevin still parrade themselves around in our society. I strongly advocate for a firm legal sytem where justice will be quickly dispensed to victims of violent domestic abuse like Ogo. And the knife threatening and all; if Kevin tried it in the US...oh my! He will find himself in a maximum security prison before he can finish spelling K-E-V-I-N.
On the other hand women should be able to speak out; to families and then friends when going through such kind of abuse. Being in love doesn't mean you should be stupid. As for the likes of Kevin whose babrism has taken toll, i assure you that you will account for your actions; if not to society, definitely later to God.
I heartfelt sympathy to the families of this unwise but extremely courageous woman.
J.Agwu,
Lagos, Nigeria.
U just dnt knw when the tears come rolling down. Rest in peace Ogo
when i say im not getting married pple think im joking.In a world where 99 percent of men who toast me are married men,i imagine what my own husband would do.Why not have kids and live in peace ,than have a man who treats u like shit.
men begin their lives as soon as they get married,a woman's life ends when she gets married.mtchewwww
Where you ditched because you are a broke ass lol, so its only rich guys that beat their wives and igbo ones especially. What a smart way to think clap for yourself.
Ogooooo i can only weep in anguish!u were such an angel..i miss u so..ur gentle smile and spirit is gone....
here i am and no woman wanna give me that attention and love even when am fly and fresh lol,they choose the ones that lie to dem and treat dem like piece of shit,it is funny dat some women re ready to die for some scumbags,i was emotional while reading this but hey we must try and love the right person and say no to any direct or indirect violent relationship,most gals want guys with money to spend and i only have money to spend on myself,i hope i will find that woman dat will not show me pepper,wot women do to men are worse,plz if u re dat woman dat has love and needs more love den holla at me,i started visiting this blog this year and this is my first comment,welcome me guys...i am mr fresh and fly,RIP ogo,MAY UR KIDS REMAIN SPECIAL AND MAY KEVIN REGRET FOR EVER...AMEN
Ogo, your peace is eternal. You will feel no more pain, neither will you cry anymore, no one will curse you anymore and no one will treat you badly. Men, may we show more love to the once we chose to marry. May God bless your children.
So so sad,women r going thru so much in some silly marraiges n they don't talk.may her soul rip.and I wish d kids d best!no one like there own mum ever.d swine of a husband has privacy settings on his facebook address,beast of no gender
Shd fulfild her marital vow. Bt it was a hard one. Rip Ogo
I can't stop crying! Asin, what did she do to deserve this??? Wow! Wicked world! I'm so sad! I can't stop staring at her pictures on facebook.
I knew dis woman wen she was studying pharmacy at UNN she was my dads student, to say dat she is beautiful is an understatement she was an epitome of angelic beauty, too sad she had 2 go through this trauma wen she was alive. My message 2 kevin is dat u can't be charged of murder but u shld know u killed her n u shld seek redemption with d remaining time u have left. I pray dat God continues 2 guide Kamsi n Amanda dat they will grow up 2 be noting like their dad And lastly may the soul of this beauty Ogochukwu rest in perfect peace Amen.....d plight of men
This is one side of a story. How can anyone judge before hearing the other side. Sweet Kevin; now she's gone, I'm sure you soon replace her; please choose a woman like me, i will love you enough to put a BULLET in your head cos thats what you deserve. You are a wicked man preying on the weakness of loving women and you should be dealt with. I hope you reap what you sow.. marry your mum and sister in law, you all deserve each other. Wicked people.
Just so you know, this is a very true story. I always prayed that someone would tell the truth someday and release the woman from her suffering. I was going through same but i left and remarried and i have found so much joy. But it is not all of us that have the same strength and will power. I left almost a broken human being but i had suffered enough. I left with a ruined anatomy but God restored it all. I had only one friend who stood by me and said leave or you will die in this house. I was scared so scared but i eventually ran for dear life. Marriage is good! But we should know when it is no longer working. It is not human validation that matters but Gods. To Gods glory i remarried to a really good man and yes i have all those kids i so longed for. Bless us all.
#Deep! Wordz alone can tell hw painful yur marriage was, no mata hw hard we cry we still cnt imagine wah yu must hv gone thru.
I pray a woman wud love me as much as you loved yur husband, I knw u r n a beta place now, please forgive your Husband, and pray yur kids 4giv their Dad n turnout 2b Good pipo n society.
Ogo, yuv taught us sumfn great, we r ever grateful. R.I.P
-korectboi.
There are two sides to every tale, and this side is definitely full of falsehoods, and an inane negative imagination. These false fabricated allegations have been reported to Nigerian security agencies. The individual(s) responsible for this defamation of the character of a gentleman of integrity would be fished out by the law, and taken to court.
So, I'm nt d type dat jumps into conclusion without making sm findings n I did google-search d kevin on sm site where he posted his CV, n found dat he works for Mobil in Eket,n also declared himself as being single in his CV which was updated on 14th of feb.,b4 d wife died. The woman jst spent her precious life in a loveless marriage.May God be wit her children, n comfort her family and may the man get the right judgement frm God.
I feel very sad reading this, may her gentle soul rest in peace.
For all you single ladies out there, you have to empower yourself before going in to marriage. I am married and believe me the way I m treated compared to the other wives is different because I am an well qualified and have a well paid but stressful job and will not be maltreated simply because i married into any family, I will just pack my bags with my kids and leave because I can afford to give my family including my husband a priviledged lifestyle, chikena. So pls empower yourselves oh!!!
Very sad....what women go through all because of the society's view on marriage. May GOD guide, direct and protect those beautiful children. Please I hope they are not with the man (I cant call him their father because he certainly is not).GOD guide us all
My prayers are with her family and children, for God to provide them with the love that Ogo can no longer provide...
To Ms Annonymous who said she can understand why d woman stayed as a 'christian'.... Please please please, d vow 'till death do us part' wasn't intended by the bible as a weapon husbands can use against wives n vice versa...it was only taking account of d natural order of life and death...Don't be foolishly thinking dat if u stay in a marriage n die cos God said 'till death do u part' dat u'll suddenly b welcomed in heaven...u'll have to answer for your own negligence.
Its wrong to blame this on christianity o... the bible has told u, God doesn't give the spirit of fear and timidity, he has given us d spirit of love, power and of a sound mind'..... Use ur sound mind to make the right choices for your life Nne! No where did the bible ordain beating as normal. If the bible can permit divorce on the ground of infidelity, how much more on the grounds of battery-to-death... that's infidelity too if u think about it, cos d bible says a man must love his wife as christ loves d church... it will b too long to break it down. Buttom line is NOBODY SHOULD GO AROUND BLAMING GOD FOR THINGS THEY SHOULD BE HANDLING...If u want God's help there's nothing stopping u from takin a break from the so called spouse to pray n reflect for direction, and believe me if it is God's will for u to experience some pain b4 glory, IT WILL NOT KILL U, U WILL ENJOY THE GLORY DAYS, AND D GLORY DAYS WILL FAAAAR OUTWEIGH ANY TEST U MAY HAVE ENDURED! Bear in mind of course dat God might be trying to lead u to d man he actually made u for, an stop trying to hold on to what u think is best for u.
God help us all n fill us with d wisdom n courage to follow his choices for us. Amen.
Kevin is a facilities engineer at Mobil Producing Nigeria. He should be made a scapegoat, an example, to all immature husbands and boyfriends currently abusing (verbally, physically, emotionally, financially) their wives and girlfriends.
All women against domestic abuse and violence need to HOLD A PEACEFUL PROTEST OUTSIDE MOBIL'S OFFICES IN NIGERIA until this man is utterly disgraced and fired, he will be a scape goat for all EVIL MEN to see.
Women, leave these men who don't know how to treat you. I left my husband of 5 years. He came crawling back 2 years later and now treats me like a queen. I didn't stay to be killed. Neither will I be having children to prove my worth. And he knows that with the slightest rubbish, I'm off again, so he's on his guard. Ladies, men need you more than you need them, let them realise that, then they will treat you right.
Dear Ogo, you live in our hearts forever.
Ogo, I know you have found peace afterall in the house of the Lord who made you and called you" Perfect". The judgement is the Lord's and Kevin and his family will face eternal wrath of God unless they repent of what they have done. You are beautiful from inside out....you exhibited the true meaning of love and God will reward your virtues forever. What you did may seem "foolish" to some of us, but you were persecuted for righteousness sake...be glad and rest in peace because God upholds His promises for righteousness. And finally, THANKS for making me realise how blessed I am with a husband that would "catch a grenade" for me and kids to die for. Thank you Ogo and goodnight. We will kiss good morning at the breakfast table with Jehova!
This is one of the most disturbing stories iv ever read!.kai!.iv got goose pimples n im weeping for Ogo..i had an almost similar experience where my ex would beat me blue black,treathen me wiv a knife,or throw my things out..i hung on cos i wanted to wait for God's intervention plus i dint want pple to laugh at me..d final straw was d beating at d early stage of my pregnancy,lost it,n Omo,took to my heels....fastforward few years n im alive,happy,healthy n laughing again....my fellow ladies,i beg u in d name of God,open ur eyes extremely wide before u leap..True story
She couldn't leave him because she didn't want the nigerian community to see her as a failure!!! We need to change our mentality as nigerians!pls marriage isn't by force people and it seems she didn't have a job or anythin. He was her sole provider
Its all because of the ill faithed mindset of nigerians with their stupid beliefs....who cares about having a male child...if u want one go and adopt...when u marry someone and fall in love with that person no one else should come between u and her..i have a girlfriend and she is so amazing for me to hurt her in anyway...if we get married in which i hope we do cus i can't imagine myself with someone else and she doesn't give me a child immediately i won't mind i wld just wait and if we really need one we can adopt ...thank God i don't have a large family and my mom dare not impose her thoughts on me...May her soul RIP tho! And may boys and men alike learn from this.
Its a sad-sad story,cldnt sleep well last nyt after reading it.my best friend has a similar story,bt tank God she isn't dead cos she left.Na nigerians mouth plus pastor's hammerin for church dey make women die. WOMEN,choose nt 2 die cos it's nt by force.RIP ogo,God will tk kia of ur kids 4u.
Till Death you showed love to your Husband and your children,Heaven is yours.Rest in peace
so sad ! May she RIP.... buh pls can someone explain how dis letter got out ? Cos ive been tryna comprehend..
i wanted to cry but hold back my tears cos she brought dis upon herself according to d story pls in God's name is marriage by force?wen u noticed all dis y dnt u run out wt ur kids and divorce him cos i knw u are nt broke then even financially, must u live under deceim roof wt a man?oh my God i wish like i was there to knock u off dat useless marriage of urs u caled love,dnt u take advice cos i knw u hv some love ones who must hv adviced u to quit d marriage but u refuse now look at wat u bought upon urself all in d name of love abandoning d helpless litle kidds God blessed u wt,my dear i dnt pity u rather i pity those kidds u abandoned and believe me i hv learn a serious lesson frm ur mistakes infact am very alert now and bitter i will punish any male jazibeal lk ur husband that wil ever acros my part,wel may ur gentle soul rest in peace God wil take goodcare of them for u dont worry and as for that useless man dnt worry he wil reap his rewards here on earth 1st b4 hell cos he wil finally get a hard woman as wicked as him who wil pay him and his mum 1million times and gv them deciem hatrade and death they gv to u,rest in peace.
Hmmm Kevin hope U̶̲̥̅̊ and ur family members knw what the bible says *the curse curseless cannt stand*if U̶̲̥̅̊ do anytin that don't deserve α̲̅ curse even wen some1 lays one on U̶̲̥̅̊ it wouldn't stand BUT if U̶̲̥̅̊ do sometin that deserves α̲̅ curse bfor the person opens his or her mouth to curse ,the curse ƪƪ automatically be on U̶̲̥̅̊ .i leave God to Oooo
( )
( )
(_ / in .......RIP Ogo
My heart bleeds for this lady. She went through hell in the name of marriage, now she is gone forever. What a loss? Why remain in relationship where one is not loved or wanted?
OMG, so sad. I wonder if Kevin love her at all. Think he was just after her beauty nothing more.
WOW!!!!!! This is deep! RIP ogo...
When I was in my teens, mymum and her sisters staged an intervention or shd I call it abduction of one of their sisters from a bullying pastor husband of hers.
I never knew r understood why until I grew up and started seeing devil incarnates in d name of men.
Ogo rest in peace, if u can, God who keeps away flies from tailless cows will kip chimamanda and kamsi. Ur story has made a change at least in me, I will not condone emotional abuse from anyone least of all my husband or in laws.
Dis is so painfull dis is a big lesson when u ar not accepted in a place den u leave simple,as for kevin n his family d bible says vengeance is of d lord
whoa!
I'm in a mad state of shock at the mo.
all these things truly happen. I had neighbours who's husband only got married to her cos it was a BET!
I'm a guy and I've done some mischievous crap, but I'll never deceive a lady into MARRIAGE!
no one should ever be treated this way, not even on bf/gf basis! it's just UNFAIR!
I pray God grants Ogo eternal rest in His bossom and cares for Kamsi and Amanda - the only people she lived for.
I pray God help Kevin realise his mistake, help him repent and forgive him.
God bless the writer and He should instil His fear in us and open our TRUE sense of reasoning
Love the Lord before loving any man. The word states we shd marry only if we MUST and those who find supposedly find a good thing.but marry only if u must. I know the torment I have been through. Ppllook at me and think pretty preety this that why is she not married. I wouldn't. Be so pretty if I entertained haf the bastards that come to rob ur peace and joy..that leave u hollow wounded and empty dried and decayed. I give God the glory. I have just blocked some guy that looks like perfection to a naked eye but my eye is spiritually driven. If your black cloud comes hovering anywhere near me afia 1-2 goodbye! A man that thinks only of u doing his bidding at his timing making sweeping judgements and assumptions..not respecting ur principles but only his flesh. Who wants to play trickery and devour u by all means necessary with no regards to what u want. Women. You better wise up, pick race and run. If hee cannot uphold u like your heavenly father pls he can like to sod off!!!! With all ur stupid chewing gum marriages. Olorun ma je!
.....where do i even begin 4rm...my heart is broken...i was reading diz out 4 my cousin..n i wept al thru...tearz r stil rolln dwn my face...ioknw wat 2 say abt dis story
My concern is 4 d kids especially d 1st child. I hp they re in good hands and I hp they re nt in care of d wicked husband & his family members. Her families shld pls fight for d custody of d children. Its so so sad
-beembolar
I have never really left a comment on your blog though i come here frequently. This was too much to resist. I wept after reading this. Dont know but is it that Nigerian men and our extended families have turned to such 'brutish' menace....(**pls dont ask why naija men.Its my personal observation..). Am shocked at the level of hatred and so much pain. RIP dear one. Your children will forever be covered with the blood of Jesus. As of Kevin and his family, i leave you to God's judgement!!! which is inevitable.
I'm sooooo angry....I had an aunt who died in a similar manner, and when she died in hospital, and he husband was notified he said and I quote,'is that why you people where calling me like that?' thinking about it breaks my heart...yesterday was exactly a year since she passed... No marriage is worth your life!!!
Post a Comment