Dear LIB readers: My fiance has been with many of my friends, how do I handle it? | Welcome to Linda Ikeji's Blog

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Friday 6 June 2014

Dear LIB readers: My fiance has been with many of my friends, how do I handle it?

From a female LIB reader
I'm engaged to a man who has dated at least six of my friends. I've lived abroad since I was 16 and only returned to Nigeria last year. Apparently he's one of hottest bachelors on the Island and has been around and slept with a lot of these women. It was after we got engaged that I started to find out about all his exes. Some of them even made sure to tell me about their past tryst with him.
I'm worried that the man I am about to marry has slept with a lot of my friends. I don't know how to handle it or handle the girls. Anytime we are all together, it's always awkward or the girls act too familiar with him. It leaves me very uncomfortable. What should I do? I am definitely going ahead with the wedding, I just don't know how to handle the situation. Please advice.

214 comments:

1 – 200 of 214   Newer›   Newest»
Anonymous said...

First to comment!

STERN said...

From a male LIB reader? Is dat an error Linda? Or hp it's nt wah I'm tinking of!

cherry said...

If u truly love him,take what's urs!dnt throw it 2 d wind

Anonymous said...

See Gobe! Be sure to share him with all your friends after thee wedding.

Anonymous said...

Hahahahahahaha! Na wa o

Anonymous said...

eat shit sucker!!

H S C said...

Ha! Goodluck with that.

angel.eyes said...

it will constantly be a source of worry to you even in marriage so do the right thing and leave him else yoy will end up a sad wife!

Anonymous said...

Mumu u made d decision so why ask? After u will com crying 2 us! Stupid desperate gal, God just revealed it 2 u, n u still want 2 go ahead wit a man who's got no respect 4 u. I left my man bcos of d same reason, am not married n his not either. But God just gave me love again. So abroad mumu dnt ask 4 advice wen u already made up ur mind.


Mrs Davido

misfixit said...

Forst to comment...sorry no advice for u.

GoodLifeBetter said...

Oloshi U're going ahead with the wedding....So why asking foolish question cos U are already dealing with it. Abi they tie your glory with his D** God knows wetin U self don do abroad that U decided to come to Naija en get Married# Mumu he'll keep cheating on U, even with your sisters and cousins all your family if they're beautiful and more sexy than you do....Eleribu omo

Debbie Chelsea said...

Do wat ur mind tells u 2 do! Since u said u gonna definitely get married 2 him......

Anonymous said...

honey, if d guy truli loves you and ready to completli dump past for u,dn let bygons b gon.u also nid pour out ur hart to him dear.
stylecast OAU

angel.eyes said...

You will continue to be worried and uncomfortable even in marriage and the truth is he may never decide to cut off those friends so why dont you do yourself a favour and save your heart from tearing apart by breaking up. But if u know you can live with it then go ahead.

Anonymous said...

Since you had your mind made up, go ahead girl! And Linda, your caption read frm a male LIB reader, like really???

Anonymous said...

I advice you to leave this guy,to avoid going through HELL!!

Unknown said...

Hian! Ina aju aju? Togbuo ya one hand. **tongue out**

give urselves brain said...

u neva halla...e get some fiancees wey their ex na men...let dat sink for ayl,den maybe u wld go get some tanxgiving materials and so pe ti e,u bera invite me to dat wedding and intro me to some of dis girls so i can take their attention from ur hottest bachelor..oon kpe...yeye foul,u for no go ahead with d marriage...

Anonymous said...

There's no comfortable way to handle such a situation. Even if U̶̲̥̅̊ cut off from your friends, you will still think about it. If you don't, whenever you Æ ̴̴͡.̮Æ ̴̴̴͡ them act familiar , you will wonder if they are still @it. Άήδ since you have said you can't leave him, deal with everyday of your marriage as it comes.

Anonymous said...

There is no big deal as long as you love him #bright bravo#

BONARIO NNAGS said...

The advice is simple.
Is that the type of man u want?
Only you knows what's good for you,life is way too short to even make it precarious with a womanizer as husband.

~BONARIO~says so via NOKIA LUMIA

★★PRINCE CHARMING™★★ said...

Wow! The word "Lothario" was formed just for your guy. Well, as long as its in the past I don't see much to it, maybe cut down on your fraternization with most of the girls.

Anonymous said...

Hi darlingg..its never too late, remember you're gonn be spending the rest of your life with this man..so tell me, do you want this 'man' to be the father of your children? (no)...so pls, it's not too late...leave him alone!!!!!

RIB said...

You have already decided what you want to do. So there's really no need asking for advice on how to handle the situation, you will always feel uncomfortable with the situation. All the best. Xoxo

Miss X said...

Talk to your fiance' about the way you feel. Its something you both should handle together.

Also, the way he handles it will give you the conviction of if u should go along with the wedding.

Remember, this is the rest of your life we are talking about. Unless you already have a safe key of divorce in mind.

Anonymous said...

You didn't mention anything about loving him so obviously u r going ahead with the marriage so dat u don't remain single,shame on u, being single is bliss,esp wen compared to marrying the wrong person or for the wrong reason,I'm married with 2kids and I wish everyday I was still single, don't rush, talk to him and trash tins out

Anonymous said...

@chux.com.......don't marry him.

Anonymous said...

Fake story. From male LIB

Unknown said...

He's leading you on until he's set to drop you.. ya eye will open soon... Sorry in advance...

……………..
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¤GROWN MAN IN A YOUNG BODY¤

Donald said...

Make your decision now, broken friendship is better than broken marriage.
First to comment

Anonymous said...

For me, there are pretty worst situations When it comes to Relationships.....I just know that amidst all the issues, Love Conquers all. Love I all that matters. Talk to him about how well you don't like his closeness with other Ladies. Mutual Understanding and Frequent Communication about anything, keeps Relationships going

BONIFACE ONWUMA said...

I think that is his past life. Nobody that doesn't have a past life. That shouldn't stop u from marrying him if u truly love him and if he truly loves u. U just have to discuss with him about the situation of u feeling uncomfortable due to the familiarity between him and the ladies. And u Linda why confuse us. Is this from a male LIBer or female LIBer. I com dey think say na one bastard fag dey ask for help. May be Onyx Godwin. Straight face.

ThatBluntGuy said...

Do you need an advice or you already made up your mind?
Why the f@#$ are you here?
Pity party?

Unknown said...

Go ahead with the wedding but make sure dey are his past and dey remain dere.

Anonymous said...

You have nothing to worry abt jst make sure u give him head every morning

Bonita Bislam said...

Learn to overlook his past or stop the wedding plans.You can't luv & trust him if you're skeptical about him and his past.Don't forget Luv & trust is the key that unlocks the storehouse of marriage!

Unknown said...

Touching, take heart and carry on. Go ahead with the wedding

Anonymous said...

how will you go ahead to marry such a man? you will ever regret it because he will never cease to cheat on you. marriage is not something you ENDURE it is meant to be ENJOYED.If he doesnt change soonest PLS Run for your life. there are always better men out there.

Anonymous said...

You Need God 4 det kind of a man; det one no be husband material; na only him get dick.Hmmm

Anonymous said...

how will you go ahead to marry such a man? you will ever regret it because he will never cease to cheat on you. marriage is not something you ENDURE it is meant to be ENJOYED.If he doesnt change soonest PLS Run for your life. there are always better men out there.

Anonymous said...

Girl, I say shine your eyes well well before you leap. It appears like you are about to get married to Mr. Boy around town. If you have the liver to deal with his hoeing ways go for it, if not, call it off because good things never end. God will surely bring you your own husband. There is a difference "Di" (husband) and "Dim" (my husband). You need your own husband not wasband.

Anonymous said...

I think you should be happy you are the chosen one among your friends and that's makes you special. My opinion o. Good luck babe. Iyke

Unknown said...

Touching, take heart and go ahead with the wedding, sure you guys can work things out after the wedding...

Unknown said...

Touching, take heart and go ahead with the wedding, sure you guys can work things out after the wedding...

Unknown said...

Handle the situation however you wish to handle it. Afterall despite knowing hes been with all these women, you are still going ahead with the wedding. So madam poster, do as you please biko see question mscheww

Unknown said...

Atleast you knw abt it dear..... he's ur man now so make d 'ex's understand this and enjoy ur man as long as u love each other o!

Anonymous said...

Did you say the mail is coming from a male reader again? Please Linda try and post the correct info.
To the lady in question, since you've made up your mind to marry him then you just have to live with the shame.The best way to handle is to act like those women do not exist.
Eww but some men can really like to act like a dog. smh

Anonymous said...

It is what it is. The question is, how strong is his love and commitment to you? Has he made the kind of changes to his lifestyle that make you think he's capable of being a good and faithful husband? If he has then the both of you must rise above his past and focus on the family you are about to begin. On a lighter note your fiance is a boss, lol.

Anonymous said...

Dearest, u don't choose a man as a husband cos he is the most eligible bachelor on the island . This one is not boyfriend things. He will not change so what u have to do is be aware that he is most likelyf to sleep with more friends of urs or neighboursand the likes. He most be a random cheat if he has already been with several of UR friend before u knew him. He is reckless. So I hope u r ready to be unhappy . On UR marks...,,,,

Anonymous said...

U either dump him or your friends. U can't keep both...

Unknown said...

a.k.a EDWIN CHINEDU AZUBUKO said...
.
Let the past be in the past and frm all indications i can boldly say this guy really love yu... I will advice yu stop seeing those frnds he slept with so that yu will stop feeling some typo way ok.... Happy marriage in advance though....
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***CURRENTLY IN JUPITER***

Anonymous said...

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ary said...

What are you looking for since you are already going ahead to marry him, a reason to break up with him? If you have doubts then do not let someone make your mind up for you.

Anonymous said...

You already have advice yourself before anyone does, my dear a broken relationship is not a broken marriage, u better know what ur doing

Anonymous said...

Pele dear.... Men are just funny most time......... Dey are lik babies..... We ladies clean dier mess most time..........But if a guy appreciate nd av value nd respect for you......even though he want to do such tinz it shldn't be arund ur friends......... Pls pray abt it....nd nvr make a mistake u ll regret later....God help you dear.

*Bomi*

jennietobbie said...

You're definitely going ahead with the wedding? I hope you're ready to go ahead with consequences of that decision? What makes you think you don't deserve better? Wake up, miss!

Anonymous said...

Runnnnnnnn......

Anonymous said...

I will advice you put the wedding on hold.
No decent man will go about sleeping with anything in skirt moreso your friends.
I don't think he respects you.

Mzz_Mary said...

If u can't handle it den quit

Lady kim kim said...

U ve said ur mind out,'u re definitely going ahead wit the wedding'u wanna stay wit sumone u nt comfortable wit for the rest of the tym u gonna stay married?u re on ur own.he cannot b trusted

Abejide said...

I'll never advice you to marry such a man, he'll probably do more when you get married, it's better to opt out when it is still easy, don't blame yourself later, there are better men out there

Anonymous said...

U r definitely going ahead with the marriage, so y bother us?!! Obviously u r ready to face d awkwardness. So enjoy n HML

addy said...

Well did you dicuss with him first off???? Cause that will help to relieve the way you feel... And that his past has long has it not happening in (PRESENT) you will get through it, I suggest you pray to God for direction and guidance that only wY, but if you go ahead and marry him that like you forcing yourself knowing all this and it can cause resentment

Anonymous said...

if u are going ahead with the wedding, then why bother asking for advice? your minds made up already. theres no situation to handle there.

Lagos Lawyer said...

Use d same otumopor wey u take convince am to marry u to take ensure say he nor go look anor woman lailai na... u don win, nor bother urself with d side talks. just ignore

Anonymous said...

If u love him. Go ahead with d marriage everybody have a past

David (dave_gino) said...

Is this dude gay?! I will count that as a mistake from DoroLinda. Well, I can't understand why a man who's not ready to worship you will propose to you. (Hope you are not the douger here...I mean hope he's not doing it for money or something else?) He's dated your friends, that's in the past. I think you should do away with those friends to have a healthy relationship. Although, it's unfair for him to have not mention all that to you. The fact that he didn't mention them earlier means there is something still fishing amongst the girls...Act wisely, know what you both want from the marriages, if the compatibility is there, what's stopping you...The ultimate is; look properly before you leap please. Don't leap before looking...

Anonymous said...

Nt married tho bt wuld say watch his behaviour wen dy r ol arund him doz he stil draw u 2 him 2 tell dem hez engagd,hw mch attention does he giv u...jst chck ol dx awt bt really I wuld say pray 4 God's direction so u dnt regret any action u make.

Anonymous said...

He is going to keep on messing arnd with them! I can't advice u to abandon ur marriage plans now but I don't think I would marry a man who has slept with even one of my friends talkless of 6. People will say it's his past but ermmm u either dump him or dump ur friends who have messed arnd with him, think of the after effects ... Those girls who he has slept with, will they still be come to ur matrimonial home? U knw how girls are, they might even still be sleeping with him but won't tell you until u find out. Trust no one

Godspower said...

When a girl needs ur advice,she only want u to support her own opinion,wat else do u want us to tell u wen u've already made up ur mind on going ahead wit d wedding? U re d winner nd ur frnds re d losers chikina

fatymahshaba. said...

My dear u are a woman you have the power to change him totally, you love him, you dont have to worry too much, what has been done is already by gone sit him down advice him to stop flirting around, since now he is in a journey of his life. About your freinds i dont think you have good freinds your freinds are suppose to make you happy, advice and be there for u. Not making your life unconfortable.

Coment, Comenter,Comestest said...

Ehn leave him and go and marry one of your friends he's bin with.... sebi u care so much about who's bin with ni ? U go single for Long my dear, if husband plenty for abroad why u come house ? KMT

Hollynolly said...

Please, please and please, don't go any further with it because you will forever regret it except if you have a plan B. If you try it, he will do more in marriage right infront of you because men believe if you are aware of it and still go ahead to settle down with them, means you will be able to handle worst after wedding as worst definitely going to come.

Oyin (dr Phill) said...

oh dear!!!, honey dont let it bother you. you have ex-es and so does he. It just happens to be your friends. Who ever tells you about his tryst with him in a "i once F&@#kd your man way" they are not your friend.

Oyin (dr Phill) said...

oh dear!!!, honey dont let it bother you. you have ex-es and so does he. It just happens to be your friends. Who ever tells you about his tryst with him in a "i once F&@#kd your man way" they are not your friend.

Anonymous said...

That's i̶̲̥̅̊n̶̲̥̅̊ d past, the only i advice i'll give is pack out of dat area. If seeing dem hurts or bring memory of d past.

Anonymous said...

Go ahead and marry him cos he chose u out of all of them. No body is a saint so marry him if u love him.

Anonymous said...

Who be this one?? You are going ahead with the wedding, you are still asking for advice. You never see anything, na scene one you still dey. Oh baby pack well!!

Unknown said...

Babe, you are just looking for gist. You've made up your mind to get married to this man, the only thing you need right now is to shape your mind to get use to your friends when they are around your man.

Anonymous said...

Every man has a past, yes!! But I bet u, u can't cope with this. The earlier the better for you. QUIT. Painful though, but you just have to.

Princess Gabriela said...

Change ur circle wen u marry! Ignore all those tots goin on in ur head&ignore all dose jealous foxes claimin to b ur frnds! They secretly wish u guys won't end up 2geda! Just make he's truly dwn for u&wont go choppn ur frnds again wn u r married!

Anonymous said...

Well thank God you have not married him yet, he definitely not the man for you. How can he claim to love you when he has tasted all your friends. Well just pray to God and ask for his direction, human advice are misleading sometimes you know.

Anonymous said...

Be sure he no more dating any of these girls and if possible I advice U change location

Anonymous said...

I hope u not talking about junior momodu?if he is then u have made ur choice so no need seeking advise all I can say is good luck. U are his gate way to his dream land USA. Am not swearing for u but d marriage won't stand. I promise u unless he change his way

Anonymous said...

Lolz , am sure your bf is one of movida and aura loyal customers and stays in 1004 cos that's the head quarters if osho boys on d island ....Pele name ur destiny be that since u can't leave him faramo be.

Anonymous said...

Really? Really? This is the kind of man u wanna marry? Well what cAn I say. If he has changed then 0kay n just ignre the shit. Like they say The past is the past-----C21

Anonymous said...

Prayer is d key!!

Anonymous said...

Change ur circle of frnds, that will be better for you

Anonymous said...

Break off ties with those ur 6 friends. We share something in common. Tho mine is just 1friend whom I had to delete off of my life. U can mk new friends. Tho it happened way b4 he met u n engaged u. I'll advice u let 'em chics go. Best for u!

MAX said...

men are polygamous in nature, but your friemds? not so cool. if you were dating him whyl he slept with dem? very bad. try dealing with it, if yu cant, BOUNCE. Marriage is a lifetime thing and im sure you dont want to be sad all yur life. also keep a distance from those friemds and show them that hes yours, and there should be a limit.

Anonymous said...

If uv made up ur mind abt getting married to him,den take d bull by d horn. His ex galfriends r u friends ryt,well tell dem hw u feel n if de really value ur friendship, dey wld hush( i bet de r all still very single cos no girl hooked to a guy wld b telling tales of their ex). Better still, speak to ur fiance to gve each of dem a firm n lasting hushup.
Ur d chick with d ring, d earlier de strt to set boundaries d better 4 everyone involved.
btw ur husband to b sounds like a flirt- shine ur eyes well o to avoid wahala later.dis days love no de blind again o

APPLE said...

You have to break up with him because a broken engagement is better that a broken marriage.

Anonymous said...

Sweetie, u dont need our advise. You've already made ur decision. You're definitely going to marry him. Deal with it.

Anonymous said...

Its one thing for an an ex to act very familiar wt ya fiance.Hwevr its another thing 4 him t acknowledge it and reciprocate if u catch my drift.A man who respects u wld be brief n brisk wt these girls n d way he treats u in their presence wld shut them up.But if he isnt doin this then dump his arse fast!!!!!!

TGBENSON said...

Hence u know u av no option but to go ahead with d wedding, u must know how just to handle it ur self! Abie u think say husband dey 4market? If u like don't just adjust to ur man n marry n love him like dat, make u dey there dey seek how to handle it while anoda woman is praying4u to give way so dt she can marry d guy sharperly even tho he wil be cheating on her4d rest of her life she wouldn't mind so long she jst answer his name as his wife!

Anonymous said...

First you guys need to stop hanging out with those girls.
If you guys happen to coincidentally end up seeing each other at functions, fine. However, tactfully learn not to have too long conversations around that will keep them around. Hi and bye is enough.
Also, you shouldn't be close to those girls, as being close to them may give them the avenue to want to 'test' your husband. I am a woman, but women scare the shit out of me. They can want to start acting all 'interesting' infront of your husband to trigger his past memories with them. Dont be close to any of them. Infact, you need new friends.
Also, tell your husband to man up and also remind him he is not the only one having temptation outside. Inform him that both of you need to work together in being loyal in your marriage. He should not give them the avenue for them to be acting too overfamiliar with him, like patting his shoulder, his arm etc. He should act like a taken man, else no matter what, if he doesn't prove it in his actions but only uses words to fend them off, they will not take him seriously and before you know it, they'll start looking for loopholes in your relationship. He should fend them off, even if he has to consort to rudeness.
Remember, you going after those girls will not make sense. This is because these are just the girls you know, what about those you don't? Your husband will have to be the one to do majority of the work to fend them off. Persuade him to do the job, and above all else PRAY and BELIEVE in your prayer, and also ACT like everything has already been handled.
Inshaa Allah, all will be well.
Good luck in your marriage. I wish you both many happy years

Unknown said...

She didn't mention love.
She just wants to go ahead with the wedding....

Toronto Finest said...

You wish you was still single because the guy is still struggling right? Shame on you

Unknown said...

Hmmmn...he MAY not be promiscuous in marriage.You know hom better than we do.
Be wise.

Anonymous said...

How do you stay in love and keep on trusting a serial "everything".
Are you married Bonita?
If yes then you might be one of the lucky ones.if not,pls don't give advise on what you know not.

joy Egbunu said...

Run for ur life! I,m a victim n trust me, it won't end well!!!

Ms. Sane said...

RIB, I totally agree with you. The girl has already decided she would marry the guy, so what does she want us to say. The way I see it ehn, she's the only one who can do something about it.

Girl: nobody can do anything about the awkwardness, but you. You certainly cannot change the history they share, and since you seem determined to marry this guy, then only you can CONTROL how you feel and only you can do something about the awkwardness around these girls. It's time to OWN your decision, and be confident in that decision (right or wrong), knowing that it is what you want. Also, it is OK to tell your friends to BACK OFF if they continue to act too familiar. Truth is things have changed now: the guy is with you, not them and you are about to become this his wife. True friends would respect the boundary that naturally forms at this stage of a relationship. Obviously, that's not the case and boundary doesn't even exist. Oh ghel you better create it, even if it means cutting those friends loose. It's up to you speak up to those "friends" and let them know your mind or cut the friendship.

David (dave_gino) said...

Stupidity. I think anonymous should stop to exist here.

Unknown said...

It's very good u re asking us. But the point is ve u asked God, he's the only one with the greatest and sweetest answer after all deres ntin too impossible dt he can't do. So my dear the best tin for u is go on at least 3 days fasting and communicate with God, ask him watsoever is bothering u and u will surely get answers. The most important tin is to find out if truly the guy has bin ordained for u. Goodluck and I pray God sees u thru. Amen.

Anonymous said...

She only asked for advice! Why the insults.... even among Pple that are learned we still got literate and illiterate.

David (dave_gino) said...

I disagree. After marriage, there's always limitation or boundary amidst old single friends especially when they start having kinds

Anonymous said...

Goosh...y the insults??

Gbenga said...

Not everybody has a past, especially not an irresponsible past like this one!

Unknown said...

Tnk u for trusting us with answers to ur question BT the point is ve u trusted God enough to hear from him. The best solution to ur question is for u to go on fasting and prayer, lay all ur burdens to God and he will surely answer u after all he is the God of possibilities. The most important tin is to confirm from God if he's ordained for u. Marriage is a life time tin, don't make the mistake of Goin into it naked by not consulting God. Allow God to be in the middle of ur relationship and he will See u thru in Jesus Name. AMEN. Goodluck my dear.

Anonymous said...

If hez slept with your friends you cant stop dem from hooking up after you are married afterall he is deir ex also so you will share him forever

Anonymous said...

I laugh tire which one be this @good life better why eleribu Linda ur blog is for comedians

NnekaRUTH said...

Dear lady, I've been married for about five years and what my little experience has taught me is that whatever difficulty u face in a relationship does not change after marriage, In fact it gets worse and can even threaten that union. It is either you are willing to overlook it, accept it or leave. It is as simple as that. This is because when the marriage is past that "helplessly in love/ can't do without you" phase (which will definitely happen) you start seeing each other for who u truly and really are. There is no more pretending. The only choice there will be is to deal with it and if u can not deal with it, what will result is two miserable people living like sworn enemies as husband and wife. Marriage is no joke so my dear lady, run while you can.

Amarachukwu. said...

Pls u need to put the wedding on hold...what makes u think he has stooped sleeping with your friends? Watch him closely and then decides if u want to spend the rest of your life with him n believe me he will continue doing so after the wedding.

Anonymous said...

Well. Since you already marrying him. All I can say is keep dealing with it the same way you have been dealing with it when you were dating him. The only difference is, now your his so you really can't complain about what u seemed to be cool with when you were just dating. Good Luck girl. Marriage is a whole other world. Happiness is a personal experience.

Anonymous said...

REALLY,WHERE IS YOUR PRIDE? ARE YOU THAT DESPERATE TO MARRY A BIG BOY. IF HE HAS SLEPT WITH ALL YOU FRIENDS WAIT TILL YOU ARE MARRIED HE WILL MOVE ON TO YOUR SISTERS, COUSINS, RELATIVES AND IF THE LIST RUNS OUT HE MIGHT JUST START KNOCKING BOOTS WITH YO MAMA. GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER, GET YOURSELF SOME SELF ESTEEM, SELF RESPECT AND KICK HIM TO THE CURB OR BETTER STILL LEAVE HIS ASS AT THE ALTAR BEFORE HE DOES THAT TO YOU.

Anonymous said...

Leave him... Even if he left ur friends, u will nt enjoy ur marriage wit him..

Anonymous said...

Since you say you'll stay no matter what, you should worry that he doesn't check those girls when they flirt with him in front of you. His behavior should tell your friends about your place in his life despite his past intimacies with them. He doesn't respect you and will play if given the chance.

Anonymous said...

MISSY AIDS IS REAL. REMEMBER YOU ARE MARRYING ALL HIS SEXUAL PARTNERS AND THEIR SEXUAL HISTORY. YOU CANNOT BE EXPECTED TO SLEEP WITH YOUR HUSBAND EVERY TIME WEARING CONDOM.

A.A.O said...

Its like you are almost blind abi?

Unknown said...

If I'm in your shoes, i don't think that i will continue the wedding but I'm not...so good luck

Sweet Dinma's Blog

Anonymous said...

What advice do u want 4rm LIB Readers? Or u wanna pay him back by f**kin six of his friends? C'mon babe its d season of WWE PAYBACK & REVENGE. #Brassman#

Anonymous said...

Who raised you? You just disgraced them!

Anonymous said...

If a man wrote this about his own fiancee sleeping with his friends, I'm sure most of the females here screaming "dump him" would now be saying stuff like...."Its in her past naa, be man enough and mature enough to take it", or "leave her, a better man than you will come", "If you love her then go ahead, we all have a past", etc. Chai! #diarisGod o....anyway I advise the OP to ignore gossip and go ahead, as long as he wasnt cheating on you! After all, she has exes too doesnt she?

Anonymous said...

If it was a woman that slept with all her fiance's friends, what advice will you give?

Anonymous said...

Ask annie Macaulay tuface has slept with all her friends. She will advice you

Unknown said...

wat do u need advice for again wen u av said u will definetely go ahead with d wedding...... d situatn cant be managed... just play along..

Anonymous said...

* First not "forst" thank me later. Linda, I beg u dey give award to the person when first comment?

Anonymous said...

If you truly know what you are looking for.kindly follow your heart.that is the only advice i can give you




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Anonymous said...

Ya eye no dey work ni? It reads 'from a FEMALE' apparently u saw Male. I recommend u for a surgery.

Anonymous said...

I suspect u r one of those friends she's talking about

Anonymous said...

Mumu,foolish fool!wettin u dey abroad dey do since now you want come render our homemade girls husbandless.Good for you since u ve advised urself then u live to see the outcome

Anonymous said...

U sound pained. Are u one of d six frndz?

Anonymous said...

Don't worry eh, marry him since yu said you are going ahead. We are waiting for you to change the tittle from your 'fiance' to 'husband' has been with all your friends tha attended your wedding. Anofia!!!!

Anonymous said...

4 me its a no

Anonymous said...

Take it easy,she only sought for a piece of advice..just kip quiet next tym if U̶̲̥̅̊ don't av anyfin reasonable to say

Anonymous said...

Search ursef as well

KE said...

Hi babes,i think d best thing is to stick with ur man,if u truly love him. We all hav our past n dats his past. My advise is stay clear of those your friends start a new life make new friends. It will be to dangerous to keep your man's ex-lover closer to you.

Olubukola Ozone said...

To dose of u sayin d title and d story dosnt match, cone on, dis is simple english.

Unknown said...

Ah ah ur asking? Him no get frends??? Be with the ones u can na 50/50 na wah oh!

Unknown said...

As in eh... goodlyf u cn nva b a moda or fada wif ds kinda advice.. Godforbid.. here is d worst place sm1 cn seek advice

Anonymous said...

You are an idiot for seeking advice on this issue. If I asked you the question "my fiancee is a prostitute, should I marry him", would you think I still have my wits about me?

Unknown said...

Goodlyf u jst bitter... dats wht I v noticed..go n settle ur p wif ur bf or hubby or evn wife or gf... if nt sorry is ur name. . U l end up bitter for lyf.

Unknown said...

Gooflyf... ndo oo... sorry

Unknown said...

Chosen one my a*s!
Rubbishest comment ever!

Unknown said...

He doesn't love her. He simply wants a woman that no guy on the island has tasted. Period!

Unknown said...

No woman has the power to change a grown man please. U either cope or leave. Let this sink in

Unknown said...

Jah bless!
It can never end well
This is six of her friends. How many more among those that re not her friends? Its clear dt he's a chronic womanizer
Well, we nevr kno wat we prevent by doin som certain thns until we decide not to do them. Poster, u can defy all the warnings here nd go ahead. Afterall, its ur life.

Unknown said...

Oya, chop kisses. U ve said it all. In summary, u can't change a grown man
I just dey vex this night sha

omalichaspeaks.blogspot.com said...

Lol @ good life. Cool down na.
Poster, I don't think you'll be happy about your decision to marry him in the next few years. Sounds to me like you are carried away by the fact that you are engaged to one of the 'hottest bachelors on the island'. My dear, there's more to marriage than swag and hottness. If this dude has been with six of your friends and still hang out with hin, what makes you think he's not sleeping with them still? I suggest you think deeply about your decision to marry him. The worst thing that can happen to a woman other than childlessness is a miserable marriage.
Trust After Infidelity- Is It Possible? Click my name to read more and share your thoughts

Anonymous said...

Hi. Just like someone said. Remember you're going to spend the rest of your life with him so if you are not ready don't get married now. Then another question is, does he love you? I mean do u think he loves you? Do you love him or is it bcus perhaps your pregnant for him so u decided to go for the married? If you are pregnant don't abort. Most importantly he has to want you at least. Then at last have a talk with him and explain to him what ur concerns are. See if he agrees to stay away from you friends. Don't force him to. He has to be willing to. Then both of you must relocate away from those you friends. I mean move out of the state or even country if possible. StArt a new life okay. If you can have a talk with your girlfriends to make it clear that you don't want them coming on to your husband. I hope your girlfriends were not dating him as there boyfriend first while you were sleeping with him on d side. If so, you did wrong for sleeping with your girlfriends boyfriend. They might wanna revenge against you. You know how messy it is more than us readers. If you can't answer any of these questions properly then don't marry him

Anonymous said...

Change friends. Make new ones. No need to play with fire. Over familiarity with them may tempt him in the future because that friendship barrier has been broken before with them and sparks can come through memories.

wytepearl said...

Babe,
You wanna use a man's past to judge him? Bad idea.Talk to him about it and most importantly, if you can, keep him away from your friends. Same people urging you to break up with him now will be the ones mocking you if you are still single in the next 5 years.I believe you love him and he's man enough for you, if not, you wouldn't have accepted his proposal. Let's just hope he's a better person now.
One more thing, me think the friends you keep are bad girls. Stay away from them.

Anonymous said...

U already made up ur mind and here asking for what to do. My dear, I will advice u find a way of bringing together all those ur friends and ur hubby to be then throw out ur worries to them, so they shld stop or u just end up d deal. But let me ask u, have u not been doing same or related abroad? U have stayed too long over there to deny dis Q. Seaarch ur heart..

Anonymous said...

Mumu. com u don't like his attitude nd u want 2 marry him. Na u sabi

Doc Pucker said...

Odeh!!! big one.
I bin think say people wey come from abroad dey get sense... probably need to check which country u jst return from sef.... mayb naija condition/mentality even better pass d place. since u already made up ur mind, why come waste bytes on this blog. Very soon, those girls will tell u that u dont even know how to service ur man (compared to them). Just hope the guy didnt conclude in marrying u cos u have relatively clean record in lagos/island when compared to the many ladies he knows in lagos. Anyways, its ur life finally. and I wish u wat you wish for urself in ur marriage.

Anonymous said...

If am right David is a man's name and you are suppose to be out there making money for the women in your life not coming here to fight women and tear gossip with us even when the topic was not about fighting soldiers .foolish boy David !

Girl,if you are serious about him being hot & flying penis,just drop his number with LINDA let me help you one on one and conduct the test to know if he can be trusted.

On a more serious note,girl you are the one that will spend all the days of your life with him.if his presence makes you happy girl pls hold him strong,talk to him about your feelings with those women and see what he have to say,check how truthful his answers to ur question becos some not all women do claim to bed men especially if d man in question is hot as you said.

I wish you the best in life sweetie.

Anonymous said...

Sweetie once you get married, they will cut the ties with him, except the shameless ones but it's left to your husband to put the boundaries. You have nothing to worry about. You can put him in his place when you get married

Anonymous said...

Be calm before y'all comment, Linda wrote Male earlier and changed it later!!!

facenaija tv said...

I pray google will upgrade blogger comment so that people like this will be the last to comment.
For you Gal, you need go ahead and feel like champoin bcos you won the champoins league of iland! Congrats

Anonymous said...

You already made up your mind about marrying him despite he obviously having no respect for you. So you should already have a plan for how to manage the situation. I'm only commenting to express how sorry I am for you. I am married to a good man, even then, marriage is still hard. So I can't imagine how your marriage to and life with this man would be. Well, Maybe you are super woman, then you will probably survive it. This is wishing you don't endure a miserable and frustrating married life. All the best.

Anonymous said...

gudluck gurl.no adviz cos u hv made up ur mind.

GCY via Nokia 808

Unknown said...

@ Anonymous 10:35 my thoughts exactly.

Tamunotonye said...

The thing is, a cheat is always a cheat. He will never I mean never change. Don't think wen u get married he wil change. Cos he wil continue. If u know u are ready 2 be hearing things like ur husband is a pay master or he has slept with almost all d gals on island. Then go ahead

Anonymous said...

Lol!

Anonymous said...

Because some if these posts are annoying. She has made up her mind to get married to him, obviously she's desperate. Then you're asking for advice on how to handle a situation you created for yourself!

Unknown said...

When people write to this Blog seeking for advice and you all Anony.... Start insulting the person, does it really make sense? She needs advice not insults. Most of you have worst ish to settle in ya lives......
My dear LIB reader, Marry your boo and change your friends.

Doo said...

Advice on wat?wen ur goin ahead wit d weddin.well,my. Advice is dnt xpect a magic in ur marriage.That's who he is n dnt xpect a saint in ur marriage.gudluck

Anonymous said...

Go back to school lyndy Mk.

mendels said...

You have to let one go,so itsd better to let ur frnds go if u love ur man and really ready to do anything for him you have to go on wit ur life.

Aymii said...

Gbenga almost errbody has a past and almost errbody has ex'es........

What our poster really needs to find out is whether her man is ready to leave his philandering ways now that he's getting married,........

If the answer is YES...
then she can forget about the past.....Unfriend herself from errfriend who has slept with her fiance in the past and look forward to making her marriage work.....

If the answer is NO..(since she has made up her mind to marry him)..
Then she should tighten her belt and get ready to share the negro with those 6 friends she knows and another 36 fresh new Concubines that will come after the marriage.....

#the guy na real DON JUAN..lol#



On 2 the Next!

Voice of Man said...

You know what to do......VOM

Voice of Man said...

Is he the only man on earth..... what is yours will surely come ur way......VOM

Anonymous said...

If u will definitely go ahead with the marriage then definatelty expect to be a very sad wife or a divorcee......gbam!

Anonymous said...

ur own don finish!

Unknown said...

u already av d solution, since u are going on with d wedding, all i can say is gudluck dear

tonia said...

U dey crazy,see diz gal ooo

tonia said...

My Dear,in my own way I will advice u to put a stop to dat weeding,hw can u marry a man dat has sleep wit much of ur firends,na only him get dick,but if u want to move on with ur plan,u better be ready 4 hrtbreak!!!gud luck gal

Anonymous said...

Best comment eva!

Anonymous said...

hmmm.u beta run as fast as ur legs cn cari u if he isnt ready to set boundaries for ur sake.

Anonymous said...

Ur ryt....i tink most of d action shld come from d guy cos ur nt policing him 24/7,moreover if he luvs u he shld stand up4 u.
I dnt tink those gals r really ur friends. Wen ur galfriend marries,even if u were as thick as thieves a friend with brain wld no d kind of gist,hw to behave with ur boyfriend.

Reillh said...

Nice one @wytepearl but trust babe. If u like him then get ready to bear his wrangling penis cos he is never gonna change. The only way to help is to be the virtuous wife

Anonymous said...

Please Relocate!

If the man refuses, quit the wedding.

If he agrees, marry him and please you guys should relocate. #Bestanswer
#Bewise

Reillh said...

Not nice at all. Your words were too harsh.

Eze king said...

I feel you should hold off the wedding and give some time to seek God's face over the matter

Eze king said...

Hold on a bit with the wedding and seek God's face over the issue.

Anonymous said...

There was one guy like that from jand about ten years ago. The amount of women that slept with this boy know no bounds. Someone eventually married him. She was acting like she won the lotto then lmao. They eventually moved back around the lekki area. I wonder what the story is now

Anonymous said...

DEAL WITH IT!!! He had thing with other girls before u.. u chose to still marry him so u have to fix ur mind to get over him sleeping with your friends..
As for your friends, talk to them about it. Joke about it, you cant change the past, u can only make it funnier. When they see you are comfortable with "YOUR MAN" hanging around them, they would in turn respect you... and u would have a happy life. You will be fine, dont listen to all these dumb asses not understanding your dilemma.

otevee said...

hes nt to be trusted...am sure he knew they were your friends befor he went ahead with whatever happened....so ma dear think it over before making a decison you will leave with for the rest of your life

Anonymous said...

End the relationship dear. This guy is a womanizer and only God can change him not man

Anonymous said...

Ditch ALL the six girls he has dated before (Find an excuse) and make new friends.
Your man is not to be trusted either, am very sure he knew all those your friends mingle together before dating each of them. I'll be VERY careful if I were you.

Anonymous said...

See GOBE!!! my Advise is better stop hanging out with them then, simple

Unknown said...

I tink you shud pipe dwn. If he is really trust worthy n doesnt av anything to wit any of dem, he shud av told her abt dem bfor nw. for more dan five of her friends to av dated one man, den their friendship shud be questned.
In fact, jst get redy to share him if u ll continue wit getting married wit him.
Goodluck ;)

Anonymous said...

Get out of that relationship dear. That guy is a womanizer and only God can change him no man or woman

Mayocis said...

Worst if those girls r not married. I dunno his reason for haven slept with most of ur friends. There's a possibility he just enjoys it n it has become a habit. There r basically three reasons a nigerian lady wud sleep with a guy. It's either she's hoping he'll marry her eventually somehow or she's hoping to make money out of the affair or out of curiosity. Hardly just for d fun of it. If he's d type who won't mind spending on women just to sleep with them. I'm very sorry u're finished.

Anonymous said...

Gurl if he chose ,then be happy. Afterall the other girls would have bn in ur shoes. He chose you cos thereS a difference frrom the other hoes who knew they are ur friends and still fucked him. Think Bout it, do you think you the only girl he could get from yankee? If u love him trully n he respects u from now on go on with your marraige.the devil u know is better than the angel u dont . So many people not even your friends will love to be in your position. But i will tell you something it doesnt matter wat he did. Remembr he could have done that even while u married.but ll tell you a secrete that works IF YOU OUT GOD FIRST, HE WILL ARREST HIS HEART AND HUS WAYS. Nobody ever said it would be easy but we pray it goes good.and please take your business of social media. This shit only gon fuck ur head up. Seek advice fdom a Godly person and mature. I pray for you that it will last and shame all ir enemies be safe
My dear.

Anonymous said...

Smart thinking @ lyndy MK

Anonymous said...

Best comment ever

Anonymous said...

Angel Eyes, I seriously suspect u. U are one of those her friends, ba?

Anonymous said...

This is a case of kpekele kpekele arugbo je gbese ta ni o soun and I pity you. you are definitely marrying him ba now i'll call you oniranu somebody and you know why cos you are making it a compulsory something which shouldn't be.

remember the case of funke fowler and abi kuku. a word is enough for the wise. you marry him at your own RISK mschew!!!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Live ko, love ni, love cannot sustain a bad marriage, what's love got to do with it.

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