You don port? (Continuation of See Finish Syndrome) by Charlyboy | Welcome to Linda Ikeji's Blog

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Saturday 22 February 2014

You don port? (Continuation of See Finish Syndrome) by Charlyboy

A part 2 of Charly Boy's first article on See Finish Syndrome. Find it here. Check on it below..
When I published my piece about the death of desire in marriage/relationships (“See Finish Syndrome”) I didn't expect the kind of feedback I got on that matter, hummm see gobe!
It was clear to me that the marriage institution in Nigeria is in a big problem. Ninety percent of the overwhelming phone calls and emails were from angry, lonely, disgruntled and confused wives. It was then it hit me that millions of homes and marriage relationships are going through a very bad patch, wives are growing very disenchanted with their husbands and their relationship. Before I did the piece (see finish) apart from experiencing it personally, I have heard and seen so much sadness in too many homes that made me swear and ever determined not to allow my marriage be caught by the "See Finish" bug.
From the mails and the phone calls I received, it was clear to me that many wives whilst still in their relationship, DON PORT. They have emotionally moved on engaging in hot sizzling extra-marital affair. The number is alarming, their reasons are as enlightening as it is revealing and I must add, I learnt quite a lot from all the sad stories I heard and read. Thank God for the opportunity, I will always share with my readers some of my personal experiences, trusting that in coming clean I will also learn from the mistake of others. Long story short, it is for me therapeutic.

Many wives these days "DON PORT", alarming unconfirmed statistic show a large number who have grown disinterested in their marital sex, while husbands are busy reassuring themselves that their wives are still "The Good Girl" they married. Hummmmmm. For many who wrote in and I spoke to, swore that they never thought they were the "Type" that would ever cheat, but now they are far too deep into it and never want to stop. I begin to see a pattern in all of this confusion, if we don’t develop an accurate understanding of our wives; very soon, marriages will become old fashion because so many people are becoming disillusioned with the whole institution. In all of this, so many men are stuck with their societal beliefs about females that are grossly distorted and completely erroneous. Wahala dey my people.
The following is a letter from one of my numerous readers, since she doesn't mind me sharing it with you, I don't mind either…

Hello AreaFada,
I am writing this because there is a serious issue I'm struggling with, I desperately need to share it with someone. I felt I could open up to you and not be judged having followed you for long. I don’t mind if you use this mail on your several platforms, i believe i speak for many too.

I got married in the 90's to perhaps the most wonderful man on earth and together, we have one of the best families anyone would wish to have. My husband and I are doing very well on our jobs and our kids are excellent both at home and at school.

We have no reason to suspect each other or anyone, there is nothing like lack of trust in this relationship. We live in each other's body and so, privy to what the other is doing per time and we are very supportive of each other, at the same time, being each other's worst critic because we always are on the look-out for areas to improve. We're absolutely loyal and faithful to each other, nothing less than a 100%.

This is a summary of the home I had until 3years ago.
I met a man in the course of my job who came along with a new information and completely opened my eyes to a new feeling.

Ours wasn't a chance meeting, we worked together on a project so we exchanged phone numbers and since then he has always called. That was the beginning o, he would not let me rest, calling and texting nice stuff almost by the minute. Before long, I started looking forward to this. We started bonding like you can never imagine. In a very short space of time, we became an item. This means spending more time with him........at the expense of my family time.

I didn't start sleeping with him o, we kept things off SEX Lane and surprisingly, he didn't make a fuss. Of course, each time we saw, he wanted to get it on but as soon as I told him 'No', he just let me be without getting angry. At least not obviously.

This singular act, I think, is the clincher that made me very fond of him because back home, the only thing that caused quarrels between my gentleman husband and I was the fact that he made too much fuss each time I refused him sex, when I'm tired or not just in the mood. He gets angry to a convulsive state and I used to wonder if it was running away.

For more than a year of seeing each other, my now boyfriend (OMG, am I writing this?), asked for sex and I felt obliged. He had been very understanding, so why don't I do him this honors. So I agreed. He was so gentle and alluring, handled me the way no man had ever done me before. I felt like a woman, perhaps for the very first time, allowing me experience orgasm before him, Wow, is this heaven or what? After which he gave me my 1st bath as an adult. I had never seen that before. It's a season of firsts for me and I was loving every second of it,
Please pardon me, I crave your indulgence, I needed to open this up to someone and I'm glad I found your platform. Thank you. Just hear me out, that's all I ask.

I no longer have time for anybody and anything else. I get infuriated by the smallest things, making mountains out of moll hills. Any small thing, I resign to my basement and ask that no one disturbs me. My basement, which hitherto was a dungeon of not-frequently-used items in the house, is now my get-away, to be alone with my lover, who incidentally is also married. My loyalty to my family is brutally divided or is it totally eroded? My husband has been and remains a good man, i doubt if he ever has been unfaithful to me in the close to twenty years of our marriage and I know he doesn't deserve this. At least, one good turn they say....

I know, I have a feeling this is bad, very bad, but I'm enjoying this new information. Imagine, it's been well over two years since we started sleeping with each other and I can’t even find a word for the kind of sex we share. My boyfriend just knows how to keep it ever new and fresh, every single time.

The strange thing is my husband doesn't even have a clue I've been cheating. Even if the thought crosses his mind, he would probably think something is wrong with him 'upstairs' for thinking such thoughts. AreaFada, please don't advise me to stop o, just counsel me on the best way you think I can keep the groove on without breaking eggs...how to have the best of my now two worlds.
My happiness is very important, am sexually alive with my boyfriend.
Thank you for your time, may God bless you.

199 comments:

Classgist said...

ok. point taken.

Okoro said...

Bless u sir!

Mrs E said...

Love part 1 but part 2 is sooooo damn interesting

Ukwulicious said...

okay

SPOT IT - See Anything Wrong In This Photo Of Chidi Mokeme ?

Olubukola Ozone said...

As conroversial as dis man (Charlyboy) is, he talks with alot of maturity nd wisdom, nd dats y I lik him

Anonymous said...

SPOT IT - See Anything Wrong In This Photo Of Chidi Mokeme ?

Unknown said...

Wow. Wow. Wow...ahhhh, gobe!

Anonymous said...

Yikes!

Anonymous said...

This is a serious matter!!! and am scared. Its sounds exactly like the story line of "temptation- confession of a marriage counsellor" I think there was a break in the link between her husband and her at some point and she probably forgot sex was suppose to be fun for her too not just her husband!

ANYA IKENGA said...

When u go to church and they say "uwa mmebi" what do you think they mean? Shit does happen. Poor husband. My advice to wives is "don't start "

Anonymous said...

Hmmmm!.. Serious something!.I recommend the movie TEMPTATION by tyler perry.

Anonymous said...

Sanusi's 1st Victory

GEJ's weapons of humiliation (SSS, AGF, IGP) dismantled by a more sophisticated & technologically advanced Drone - Unmanned Aerial Vehicle (MQ9 Reaper).

Dumbo, your ploy to silence Sanusi like you did to Governor Babangida Aliyu & Sule Lamido by opening their "Fraud Dossiers" and scaring them back to PDP has just been thwarted!

We all know where this is headed - APC vs PDP. I just can't wait!


zoharariel@aol.com

Anonymous said...

Well let me burst your bubble; nothing is ever hidden under the sun for ever. Some day it will spill out and you know what? U'll lose everything...the eggs always get broken!

joy George said...

Why won't marriages have problems when people would be saying men are naturally cheats(and all the men too agree). What is good for the geese is good for the gander,if you have the tendency to cheat as a man your wife also has that same tendency. So don't push her to the wall cuz everyone has a limit.

Anonymous said...

Well let me burst your bubble; nothing is ever hidden under the sun for ever. Some day it will spill out and you know what? U'll lose everything...the eggs always get broken!

Unknown said...

Good for him.

Anonymous said...

Na real see finish syndrome, this woman u really have 2 stop ds nonsense, since ur hubby ain't cheating on u, I dnt see any reason y u shld cheat on him, on d other hand I think I still understand u, but my dear u just wanna eat ur cake n still have it! But I must tell u this if eventually u get caught, u will loose ur home n that boyfriend of urs will not leave his own wife 4 u I swear, if he tells u he will, he is lying. Stop ds now that it's still secret, I won't have blamed u if ur husband was an absentee one, even if he was this is not nice in d sight of God n man, he is a handsa on dad, he doesn't hit u, I feel u re what in local parlance is called "LONG THROAT" I wish u well sis.

Mischievous said...

My prayer: Please DON'T STOP, keep on ENJOYING SEX with your boyfriend. May you get caught by your husband, get KICKED out, and may your spend the rest of your live in misery. You are a worthless woman and the man who is messing up your life is just as worthless.

Anonymous said...

This na real gobe! You can't have it all. Someone gets hurt at the end. You are enjoying it now but get ready to cry when the time comes.

joy George said...

What this lady is doing to her hubby isn't fair,but that's same position men put their innocent wives in when then cheat on them. Lady for the sake of God N the wedding vows you took pls stop.

jennyA said...

This one na real problem, my sis do u think dat ur unfaithfulness to ur hubby will last forever, ur hubby will surely find out one day, and u will break d poor man heart and everything will now look like a dream, u will even hate urself for life, then ur sugarman will still stay with his wife, come to think of it, if it where to be ur man dat was cheating nko, how would u feel, if u find out about it, my sis count how many moments u have had with ur husband all dis yrs and count d one u have had with ur sugarman in 2yrs, chose d one dat is many in nos, so it is left for u to decide. God bless u

Adaeze said...

They say men are bad but some women are PURE evil. You are EVIL....PURE EVIL. A good man is been violated by an EVIL woman.

Zenki brown said...

If areafada won't advise U to stop, other pple will. Plx stop for †ђξ sake ☀f Ūя̲̅ husband nd kids. B4 u permanently loose it A̶̲̥̅ll. PORT bak to Ūя̲̅ family.

Anonymous said...

shu0....#m0uth dr0ps 0pen#...dis w0man is really in t00 deep t0 even think of st0pping na old st0ry...crzly dis aint right..am nt judging but maybe..u sh0uld try nd lt ur husband knw wat u want nd hw u want it...nd if u cnt tell him to his face...try txting him...dhats d fun of sex in a marriage..if ur hubby aint satisfying u nd ur shushing up abt it...ur burying ur marriage!

Opelicious Morgann said...

GOBE!!!

Many marriages are going through rough patches today. Although with the above example, even though her marriage was almost perfect by all standards, it lacked the spice to keep it alive. Its a shame many women are engaging in extra marital activities simply because their husbands keep them at home as wife trophies while they are busy sowing their wild oats outside. These women are flesh and blood and DO get horny! Nawa oooo. God dey cuz me sef never marry so I dunno wat to say again!

Anonymous said...

Firstly God will terribly punish u so well for cheatingcos wat u took infront of the altar was an oath,nd it has got its effect,u might nt c it nw buh it will certainly happen,u r nt even ashamed....gosh,wat r u

Anonymous said...

Damn! This is deep shit n trouble mehn!!

Ola P said...

Alarm will blow very soon Mrs......and den u ll Write Areafada a story dat touches d heart and tickles d bumbum....Ewu

Anonymous said...

Life is just funny sometimes. I guess her husband too will probably be some other woman's dream-come-true while her boyfriends wife will be finding him totally boring.

Anonymous said...

The problem is that a lot of men are not really good in bed.i have met a lot of women that are fustrated sexually.A lot of men dont take time to really know their partners,explore,play games and above all,spend quality time together.They think sex is a routine thing..sex is very important in a relationship.

sii Al said...

linda point of correction.dis is Charly Man not Charly Boy

Jade said...

Hmmmmm! Areafada!

Anonymous said...

Hmmm, I dnt know wat to say, maybe because am not yet married, but am in love with dis married man who is also in love with me, in fact we are obsessed about each other. The truth is we were very close friends ( no sexual relationship involved) growing up and always thought we were going to be married. He started working wen I was in my second year in school. We couldn't see often because I had dis strict parental care. This guy got married to another person without informing me and that is how we stopped speaking and lost contact. Sometime last year he started looking for me when he found out on facebook that we reside in the same state. One thing led to another and we rekindled our friendship again, but this time more intimate than before. I think the guy is tired of his marriage. He says his wife is insultive, the marriage of eight years is without an issue and so many other things. I really live dis guy and can't stand him walking out of my life again. What do I do?

Anonymous said...

When she get got reality will come in,we are all humans and face such once in a while in our life if you can handle it good of you.bein unfaithful in marriage is very sweet but when you get got you realize the hurt and the pain your cost everyone who loves you,she need to go and watch tyler perry The Counselor and see how the lady ends up with HIV. We have to be wise.

Anonymous said...

My dear,your eggs go burst oo..it will burst.why don't you..tell your hubby how to do you like this boyfrnd of yours does you.since your hubby isn't denying you sex and you are still very much active in it.I have never seen a case where one eats the cake and still have it.the shame wey go follow you babe..you go forget the sweetness oo..

Anonymous said...

them say "na wetin de sweet man naim de kill man", continue, you are just a loose woman bcos frm wat you say the sex life is still.alive with your hubby, you are just loose, if it comes down to it, that man will.neva leave hisfamily for u, wen u get caught bcos u will,be ready, n linda pls post my comment bcos u neva do

Anonymous said...

Linda ds is funny bt ts serious nd t hapns evn btwn ppl dat are in a relationship..one shuld always be careful wen medlin with opposite sex wen uar engagd with anodr cos u can easly fall inluv with knowin esp wen d odr persn is gentle nd patient..as for ds lady I pity her cos ds tn fit kill her husband with heartattack if he find out.cos he trust her.was she a virgin b4 marriage

Anonymous said...

The devil is really very close to humans these days, it's so unfortunate. It's better you divorce than to cheat. Nothing in live is Eva easy , even if your marriage is having issues, turn to God to see u thru . Cheating is Neva an option and besides , how will the guy view u. It's in Gods commandment , I Wunt b surprised if u c adulterers calling for the heads of the gay people. Forgetting that all remains a sin in front of God. Hypocrisy

Anonymous said...

It is women like you that make me cringe at the thought of getting married. I just cant...!

that girl said...

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahha! She doesnt want to stop....!!!!!

Unknown said...

Truly,dis tins happen everyday.u lose appetite 4 some1 u wer 1ce crazy abt bt marriage is nt entered into bcos of a feeling,its a decision 2 make tinz work @ all tyms.eggs will definately break wen d truth will b reaveled.u will lose both ways.u might lose ur marriage,trust of ur family including ur children wich shuld b ur priority and ur bf will leave u 2 save his own marriage and face.

Anonymous said...

Wow wow!!! Enjoy sha

katherine pierce said...

Na wa.madam pls stop Cheatin on ur husband.u can tich ur husband tu du al wot u expect frm him in bed dts al!

Anonymous said...

Hmmmmm


FDJ

Anonymous said...

Nd 2tink dat d man stil trust d wife..choi
Her family is more important,u cnt rili satisfy d 2 parties

Mystic Falls said...

This one na real see gobe...Madam since your boyfriend have more skills than Ronaldinho in bed,why not tell your hussy what you want in bed since your BF has taught u a lot.Your hussy doesn't deserve this considering the fact that he is a good man,there is nothing hidden under the sun this your groove will never have a happy ending..

phemmyB dat lag bobo said...

You aren't being fair to your husband and your kids, I humbly advise you quit before your 'lust' tears apart your family and you will be left in the cold. The point is you are 'MARRIED'! Pls respect that. Godbless

Anonymous said...

Mmmhu!massive explosion waiting to happen and when it does,u will lose everything.

@MEETD®EALEVANS™ said...

I laugh, dat lady is long gone, feeling for d husband. Karma dey come for u

Anonymous said...

THE PROBLEM IS WHEN A MAN CHEATS, THE WOMAN CRIES BUT WHEN HE IS FAITHFUL. THE WOMAN SEES HIM AS BORING, WHAT SHOULD MEN DO?.................THIS STORY ANNOYS ME SO MUCH. I AM A SINGLE GUY AND I SUDDENLY FEEL LIKE NOT GETTING MARRIED OR INTIMATE WITH ANY WOMAN.

Anonymous said...

Wahala wa oooooo

Alchemistlowkey said...

hmmm, what a world, does sex now determine the happiness in your marriage

Anonymous said...

Nigga always cracks me up







LMFAOOOOOOOO. I just stumbled on this nsg blog. Can't stop laughing.

Anonymous said...

Don't advise u to stop keh! This is the devil at work.

Anonymous said...

Women!women! Fear God oo..I am a woman but when I hear some things I am fazed! How can you sacrifice your family.your 'beautiful' children because of. Sex..a max 2hr thing? I feel sorry for this woman..sorrier for her. Husband and children..I hope you encounter christ soon and change..realise that some things matter while some just don't! in God sex with your husband becomes mindblowing!yes I said it!she does not know God.what a pity

Anonymous said...

God plz may my hubby give me the best sex in the wrld and may I give him that 2. I'm never cheating! and as 4 u woman I hv no respect 4 u. Ur hurting a man who uv admitted is a good man n its nt fair. If he we're a cheat or a wife beater I might xcuse u bt the way it is .....smh cmpletely bwildered that ur nt even sorry.----C21

Anonymous said...

I am baffled. I can't even trust my gf again!

M.E.D said...

She is just a shameless prostitute........if dat is ur happiness then get a divorce and stop cheating on the poor man!

OJAI baby said...

Ojai says" hahhahhahahahaha, area fada, ok na? Help her out. Na wa for some women ooo. She does not even wat to stop. So u want to be advised on how to continue in such a way ur hubby wont knw. Thts so bad of u. Wht r u enjoying, biko kwa. Pls detest from that diabolical sin. U r both married. Face ur home. He will never marry u, get that into ur stack dumb head. If ur hubby gets to find out, u r gone and u will get a better replacement. Mtshewww

Anonymous said...

Probably the first tym I comment on this platform.. Woman u need to understand d fact that u r married sharing such an adulterous information with another worker is totally forbidden n unacceptable. U'v got to pullout from that habit n practice it wid ur husband.

OJAI baby said...

Ojai says" charlie's' eyes r green, is he wearing contacts?

Aphrodite said...

I don't blame the woman really! Many Men nd Women av lost it simply because dey re married, dey no longer try so hard to bring bak d spark, dey all relax because the are married, Some Men becomes d worst Critic eva, u just can neva do it right in dia presence, nd some women av turned to annoying Shrews/Nags, who will complain endlessly about irrelevant things. If u think u will nt be attracted to sm1 because u're married, well u Lie, but u need to just caution ursef nd nt act on it.

Anonymous said...

Madam u cant eat ur cake and av it, u av to make ur choice on who u want...¤Su•cre®.

Unknown said...

Unbelievable,but who am I to judge you, you have cheated your man out of trust,you don't want to stop but needed advice to carry on with this act of infidelity, your dead end is near, marriage is for better and worse, when things are good or bad, what about the Vows you took, are you so loose that you no longer find pleasure in the sex you have with your husband, remember there's Danger in this game you're playing. This is a lesson for all men to learn, keep the fire on your marriage burning, see and treat yourselves each new day as if you just met, don't get tired of showing love and affection to your woman before she experience it with someone else.

Unknown said...

who get time to read this Abeg make i go do evironmental jorrrr

Anonymous said...

Die bitch DIE!!!

Anonymous said...

Oga Charly Boy or Linda, point to note; Women will always hide behind the "I'm a victim " anytime they want to justify cheating and nothing you do for them will change that. Women r like children. Always seeking out the next best thing. Even when Eve was receiving directly from God Almighty, she still wanted more.

My advice to married men, go thru ur marriage with the mindset that all women cheat. All no exceptions. This makes it easier to cope with women.

@ Linda: if you like, no post.

Anonymous said...

Stolen waters r sweet! But there's really sweet abt being immoral. Disgusting!

Anonymous said...

Lindo, this is serious o. Area father has really done well by addressing this issue which is eroding most families. Most women have been turned to sex item in their marriage. Expect more from more frustrated wives.

Amarachukwu. said...

This man nor wan sing again...I think.

Anonymous said...

Wow!!!

Anonymous said...

Too long! Yawns

Anonymous said...

People are going to curse and whine.please deserve your judgments.i have been there and it was tough getting out.i didn't love my husband and children less.i didnt love GOD less.it happened.I'm out and working hard to stay out by Gods grace.

nkem.I.P said...

Hmmm na wah O! Please I know that you are enjoying ur self now but best advice I can give to u is stop whatever nonsense u are doing and go back to ur husband and practice with him what d other guy does to u den u look for how u can start falling inlove again with ur husband and cut off every communication u hv wit dat man. Believe me wen any wahala enters he will choose his wife over u so stop and go back....those who hv ear let dem hear.

Oyemen. said...

Were ni e le yi o *dis woman don craze*.

nkem.I.P said...

Go back to ur husband woman

Anonymous said...

What a world! I pity this woman cos she is heading for her doom. She should stop now. May God forgive she and her so called boyfriend.

Anonymous said...

Reading these stories really gets me freaked out about Marriage.

Anonymous said...

You are a total disgrace and an embarrasment to all the good women and wives out there.marriage is not a union of perfect people,but a union of two imperfect people coming together to accept eachother's flaws and imperfections. Now back to your question,judging from what you have shared with us,you are enjoying your newly- found habitat(did I just say newly- found?its been going on for two years,definitely not new) my dear you can't serve two masters. This is not about your husband but your home? Do u love your home? Do you want to keep it? If yes,my dear you will have to stop seeing that man and start putting your home first in everything u do.but if you are tired of keeping your home and you are sure your side sex mate makes u happy,you can continue but before you continue,don't u think your husband deserves the truth? I wasn't being judgemental but the reason why I called you a disgrace to the good women out there is simply because,you didn't even try to save your home in the first place. Ur husband wasn't maltreating you,you said he's been wonderful since you both got married. Maam you have got no excuse. Marriage isn't meant for shallow minded peeps like u abeg. You obviously don't understand the concept of marriage.#please pardon my epistle LIbers#

Anonymous said...

charliboy tell dat woman dat she is a bitch ting dis way if ur hurbby do d same fing to u hw will u fill?u re disgrace to motherhood & also rememba dat karmar is a bitch #THAT AKWA IBOM BOY

leecia said...

U need Jesus ma days all I can say 4 nw

Anonymous said...

Hmmmm...yawa dey ooo.

Anonymous said...

women....hmmmm

IPHYOLOGIST said...

This lady is insane ooo.... Lol @ "areafada don't advice me to stop" my dear you can't eat your cake and have it. You had better stop or your sins will catch up with you then you risk losing both of them....

Anonymous said...

Guess d woman shld have discussed her sexuality with her husband bcos that seems to be the basis of her infidelity. Too bad though but God help her, one day it shall turn out to be a viscious circle.

Anonymous said...

Area fada,I read ur first post "the see finish syndrome" and it made so much sense,I'm happy my marriage has not gotten to dat level but I noted some tips from ur writeup to spice it up even more. As for dis letter from lady,her xcuse 4 cheatin is not bad enuf 4 her to turn to adultery,u just like to test somtin new in ur p...sy. Indeed Sin is sweet,but I hope dis doesn't put an end to ur marriage cos dat ur manfrnd/boyfrnd no go still marry u..............pretty T

IPHYOLOGIST said...

This lady is insane... Lol @ " areafada please don't tell me to stop ooo" my dear you can't eat your cake and have it. You had better stop or your sins will catch up with you then you run the risk of losing both of them.

Anonymous said...

Nice write up! It exposes lot of things happening in the marital institution and as for the lady in the story, she had better repent cause she is committing adultery and she will receive the price in full if she dies or get caught in the act. God knows how to do His things.

Anonymous said...

Ok continue until u and ur boyfriend gum rubbish

Anonymous said...

Dis story gt as e b o...bt few seconds of pleasure cnt b compared 2d happiness of ur family..so dear tink twice b4 u loose everytn

zino said...

As you read this; somewhere in Nigeria, one guy is begging one girl to allow him put only the 'cap' in.

Anonymous said...

There's a saying in d bible " there's a way dat seemth right unto a man bt d end is destruction". Woman don't allow the devil rub u of you happiness. Dat man doesn't luv u bt is also usin u. He can excape if caught bt u.....God help us

Anonymous said...

Bros give youth a chance, you don out of fashion

Anonymous said...

Very intriguing,am in d same position,t as bad tho cos am not married.d truth is good will always rule over evil,d best way to manage this is to stop it.no 2ways out.

Anonymous said...

Bros give youth a chance, you don out of fashion
...Patrick

Anonymous said...

So serious....she don port for real

t said...

In an ideal world, she would be able to hint her husband that these romantic things are important to her and he can improve upon his ignorant performance so far, then she can gently graduate from the boyfriend.
In reality tho', people get really pissed off at marital infidelity, I don't know why. Just dumb.
I wish her good luck, wish the men happiness too.

Anonymous said...

Dis woman needs a proper deliverance. Why wld she start such wen her hubby isn't cheating on her. D devil is @ work in her life & she shld beta wake up b4 it is 2 late.

Anonymous said...

just stop cheating dear,its difficult but u HV to stop before it divides your home

Unknown said...

Nawa o. I'm dumdfounded

Anonymous said...

Thanks for sharing.The woman in question must be very stupid and shameless.Anyways maybe she married at a very tender age to an old man that is why she never had a taste of such sex orientation.Since she never want to stop,let her just await the destruction dat will come her way soonest.Maybe she didn't knw that their is danger in comfort.

Anonymous said...

Most def this woman is mad!!!

Anonymous said...

Most def this woman is mad!!!

Apple said...

I have always said it here that many Nigerian men are living in a fool's paradise. Lol. They think they have monopoly of cheating. Lol. If many of them even do DNA, they will be shocked . Nigerian women have been taken for granted for too long, you see married men cheating openly with no respect for their wives :) In my head i go just dey laugh :) If only they know what their wives are up to…hmm.

Anonymous said...

Things r happening! As d fin no dey read metre sef...is ga gaaaaan!

Unknown said...

I must commend Charlyman. I never got tired of reading his articles no matter how long. I even wish it doesn't finish haha. In all of these, so many men are stuck with their societal belief about women that are grossly distorted and completely erroneous" my mind exactly. To men, only women r faulty always.

Anonymous said...

And you call it New information?! Well who am I to judge.. A lady in a very serious relationship serving presently as a corp doctor in kebbi a place where I thought would be tortue staying for the period of the scheme, only to meet someone who blew me off my mind.. (Not an Alhaji by the way). A very young igbo, loving and stable unmarried medical practioner who is willing to build a Taj mahal for me if I agree to be his wife.. Did I mention he's been spoiling me silly with gifts especially this valentine? To think I met him just less than a month ago.. God help me out of this CONFUSION!!

Ijeoma Monica Njoku said...

For Charly Boy the Don Port syndrome is normal and expected of men but when do it, which I don't support, it becomes noteworthy. I'll read the first part and this one again. See finish syndrome indeed.

Anonymous said...

Well madam, they say bad things when done hidden is sweet, will advice u also married too, focus on ur family, if u say ur hubby is nice why cheat on him. Though not easy, I bet you that man's his wife is really suffering, cos all the things he does to please you he does not do for his wife. If he leaves his wife for u and u leave your hubby for him, I bet u, u can't spend one year with him. My university dayz we use to say a double dealer is a double looser. Shine ur eysz and forget men, face ur family cos ur sowing a very bad seed for ur children

Anonymous said...

Hmnnnnnn monkey dey chop baboon dey work *winks* keep the grove on...... fastest track to hellfire, that is if ur hell doesn't start on earth when ur hubby finds out. LOL

steffie said...

Who have time 2 be reading dis "see finish" rubbish all I have to say is all married couples should try as much as possible 2 make der marriage work, cos its 4 d best becos no body want 2 be raised in a broken home. So Charlyboy should stop repeating d same line of speech over and over again jst 2 be in news. Mtcheeeeew

Unknown said...

Wonders Shall never End!Does dis woman know God? She's even saying 'God bless you'.Hmmm,some eggs r sure gonna break

Anonymous said...

And you lots are more worried bout two male adults being faithful to each other.

Anonymous said...

Ok now, the sweetness of that which is forbidden cannot be put in words. But one quick question, what if it's ur hussy doing this n u find out about it how would u feel? Do to others as u want done unto u. Sweet anonymous.

Anonymous said...

Hmmmmm.......as a husband, i am terrified each time i see stuff like this as it means being good and faithful is not a gurantee you will get same from your spouse. The husbands shortcomming seems to be "see-finish" as mr charlyboy puts it, he is not a bad guy, just not a great lover like "super-bf". М̣̣̥̇̊Ɣ question is this, you can see that the lady is even unrepentant and selfishly pursuing her pleasure at the expense of 20 odd years of marriage, if the husband wants a divorce tomorrow people will say men are wicked. It is heartless women like this that makes men wicked

Unknown said...

Watin dey sweet for goat mouth na him dey kill goat

Anonymous said...

I can't wait to hear Area Fada's reply. Usually people WANT to stop, but this lady...............Hmmmmmmm

yusuf said...

You don't need to seek for any advice since you ve mentioned it that you cant stop. But remember anytime you are caught by you husband, you are on your own o

Anonymous said...

Am sure when ur husband finds out and divorces ur ass ur eye go clear.do you think that ur boyfriend will agree to divorce her wife no,that moment he will begin to avoid u like a plague and u will turn to an old miserable fustrated spinster.madam tamper johnson with mercy before u here am.

Unknown said...

How persin wey dem dey call Area Godfada go dey give p'ple advice? Na wa oh.
TheOjukwu - Just Wondering.

Unknown said...

Reading the comments just makes me cringe at how low d IQ of most of the Libers are. The message is not for u to insult the woman who is aware of that what she is doing is wrong, its for u to see how most women are getting disgruntled in their marriage as a result of a declining sex life.

Visages Parfait said...

Wow,I honestly can't judge this woman and no one in their right mind should because its not an issue of judgement...the devil is really fighting marriages. If the man aint cheating,the woman is. It takes the grace of God and a lot of dogedness to stay married these days.
Now the gospel truth is,a lot of people getting married don't even have the slightest idea that marriage is VERY SPIRITUAL. It is Gods' idea for a man and woman to come together and create an earthly union which is supposed to be a type and shadow of our relationship with Christ. Now naturally,the devil will poke his nose and try to contend with anything designed by God,thus the increased level of divorce,unfaithfulness,gay n lesbian relationships etc.
Even if God himself directed you to marry your spouse,one must be spiritually alert because,DEVIL NA REAL BASTARD,he'll fight to put assunder.
To you dear woman in this fix,I only pray God opens your eyes soonest!
Have a blessed day y'all :-)

Anonymous said...

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Anonymous said...

Its so sad dt a wife n mother cn openly say she feels happier in d arms of a bf as opposed to dt of a luvin husband. If u feel happier, jst gt a divorce n stick to d nu guy, I believe he shd b willin to do dsame 4 u. Nw its "I dnt wnt to stop" 2mao it will b "I wnt to av a baby 4 u" jst b careful n seek d face of God n nt man's advice, bt sadly u knw wt is ryt bt chose to do dt wch is wrong. Did dis guy actually open ur eyes or jst blindfolded u? Tink abt it madam, cos after him, I'm sure u will meet a sweeter man too n keep movin 4m man to man
Madam abeg b wise. Linda post my comment ooo

Anonymous said...

This is gonna spark a marital revolution,naturally after reading this being the good man you'd beef up ur firewall(as regards ur lady)

Anonymous said...

Y do I have this feeling that your husby knows your *dirty little secret* but waiting patiently to *laugh last*??hmmnnnnn

Anonymous said...

Logistically, how can she have hot passionate sex in her basement under her husband's nose without his knowing? Most people are very paranoid about basement noise. The tiniest sound and they're off to investigate. The marriage is over for her since she's carrying on with her lover in her home. Might as well make it official and divorce.

Harnikky said...

Woman Ɣ☺u are done for&destroying ur own home with ur hands!

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Anonymous said...

Its so easy for people outside to point fingers and say who and who God will punish or who is evil. But the fact is that many of us including those calling this woman names have been in same situation or will one day somehow be in thesame situation. Marriage isn't a bed of roses and its certainly not "settling down" as some folks will say when they want to get married. Marriage is if anything very very hard work. Its not an easy journey at all and so many things are thrown in one's way to throw one off balance. It takes a whole lot of grace and inner strength to stay faithful and focused in a marriage. Even in the best marriages there are still cracks both visible and invisible ones and these invisible ones are the hardest to mend and they most often are the ones that lead folks astray. Let's not condemn this woman because it can hapPen even to those of us with the best intentions. I hope the writer does make the best decision at the end of the day. Good luck everyone married and single. Anonymous FLAME.

('-_-) IMPRESSION said...

Men generally want to wrap sex up in 5mins, which may be ok for them but is hardly enough to get a woman in the mood. The absurd thing is that they (men) know this but they think that women, especially the 'good' ones don't really desire sexual pleasure, at least not oftenly. To think that sexual pleasure is ONLY men's thing is erroneous! Sadly, majority of men fall into this category. Some even make their women feel bad for wanting to ENJOY sex, and such women often resort to fake orgasm. There's just no substitute for good sex in a relationship, NO amount of money or jewellry can replace this. Playboys use this weakness against unsuspecting women who are in seemingly perfect marriages, because such women cost them so little- no unwanted pregnancies, no house rent and other bills to pay, no expectation to 'put a ring' on it', limited demand for time, etc.... and the women foolisly believe it's all because of love! Do you think the man in the above story wanted 'platonic' friendship while he was texting her loving messages by the minute for so long? He's most likely not sending such messages to his wife, and if he's bathing for his wife like he's doing for you, he certainly wouldn't have your time. Wise up woman, the minute your husband kicks you out, your superman will abandon you like leprosy. A word is enough!

Anonymous said...

Well I dont know what the writer is trying to achieve. I will lend my voice and will like charly boy and all to know that Marriage is still and suppose to be honourable. The so called See finish sydrome is a part of life and in everything, but what keeps it down and suppreesses is Respect, Discipline and True Love this is what suppresses see finish at home, and every where. We have the tendency to see finish whatever we are close and used to. YOu see your good clothes finish with time especially when you are always wearing it, You see your boss finish when you are very close to him or her even without sexual relationship, so it is also and not different with wives and Husband, The solution is not new adventures but Loyalty, Discipline Love, Respect and many more. As for Cheating, you are not a baby not to know that what we do illegaly and in the secret seems to be sweetest even though in reality it is not. You find your self more attached and pleasurable when you are cheating so its not new nor a big deal, it is not that the cheating partner is sweeter or better its just the nature of the act of cheating. The major problems with marriages and relationship is SELFISHNESS and LACK OF COMMITMENT and LOYALTY and ABOVE ALL DISCIPLINE. Charly boy should not come here and try to make what is wrong popular or acceptable, There is see finish is every thing and every where its not a new thing nor big deal but can be and should be handled. If there is no bodily or emotional harm i see not reason why relationships should not work whether with see finish or not if there is no selfishness, if there is Discipline, Loyalty and respect.
LINDA IF YOU LIKE DONT POST MY COMMENT LIKE ALWAYS, YOU ARE ONLY DEPRIVING PEOPLE OF LEARNING MORE.

AnnMarie said...

It would have been better if she tried to talk to her husband about it since that happens to be their major problem. No health problems, no financial problems, no in-law problems. And you wanna risk all that for sex? smh

Anonymous said...

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Diary of Dido said...

My dear, its not just the sex.
The woman is embroiled in an emotional and romantic brouhaha with this other man- the sex merely intensifies the bond.
I truly feel sorry for her- it won't be easy to stop and when/if she does stop (with her husband none the wiser) she'll always find herself thinking about him in her privacy.
The best thing though is to stop, channel back your affections to your husband and children and file away the memories in your secret archive.
Shit happens, like someone said.

Alloy Chikezie said...

Like seriously when I hear stories like this, I just get tired of even thinking about marriage, and discouraged of getting married someday, this were couples that got married in the 90's when there were still integrity, when people were still faithful, what about people that get and will get married this new era, where to find a good man and woman is like searching for gold and chasing after the wind.

But on the case of this woman, I think she is just greedy, selfish, ungrateful, and lusting after the flesh, because if you have been in a wonderful marriage for 20yrs and with an awesome husband, and after 20yrs you still looking outside, then I think you are just being ungrateful, selfish and greedy, what are you looking for outside after 20yrs in a marriage that is blessed.

There is no reason to justify such action, the only logical explanation is that you are lusting after the flesh, you are in lust, you are not seeking personal happiness but sexual satisfaction and you are doing that at the expense of your family where u are supposed to be a leader

God created sexual urge in us as humans, and that urge is an emotion, just like, love, anger, feelings, etc, that needs to be controlled, God created this emotions in us, because they are essential for our existence, but also created self control in us, "self control! Self control!! Self control!!". We as humans can not always act on those emotions, else we will always be hitting someone when we are angry, because just like, sexual urge is an emotion, same is anger.

Please young woman, stop cheating on your husband, and pray for God to continue helping your marriage, because if you continue with that unfaithfulness, with time, the marriage you have laboured so hard to build for 20yrs will just crash, and you will lose everything at the blink of an eye.

Be grateful for what you have and stop seeking personal pleasure and satisfaction at the expense of your marriage, as a wife and husband, you are a leader in your family, and a leader should sacrifice personal pleasure and gain just to be a good leader, one must make self sacrifice as a leader, so you have to make that personal sacrifice by sacrificing ur personal pleasure just for the sake of ur family and husband.

May God continue to bless you and your wonderful family and also bless all marriages, bless singles also with their soul mate, and bless all LIB readers


Your comment will be visible after approval

Anonymous said...

I think the issue of sexual sactifaction is more or less an issue that bothers around the woman and i also think that the woman has the solution to this. A woman should know what and how she can get orgasm easily and communicate same to the man, the man will not always know what turns her on sexually as this is not same for every woman, but for the man it is thesame for all men, whether a man likes it or not he will climax with time but a woman might not if not done rightly or if she is not touched rightly. If your husband is a 2 minutes man there should be no fuss about this as there are solutions both natural and artificial which are safe, i see no reason why u will abandon your marital relationship because of sexual satisfaction, it should be the least reason for divorce but unfortunately it is the major reason alot of women quit their marriages but they hide under the guise of other things. Why not speak up and cooperate with your man to solve the problem. if you want your man to be a 1hr man then go for it, there is brantashi(suya pepper), there are healthy viagra and drug suppliment, there is pop corn, there is energy drink and lot more, but i also think if you women know what turns you on and what makes you get organism your man do not need to be a 1hr man, just let him know and always desire that sex position. I have discovered that the things that causes most detrimental problems are trivial issues that can be handled. Women rise up and do the right thing, you people always point fingers whereas the solution to most of the problems in the world are with you Ladies. In the issue of sexual relationship, the truth is the Men are the weaker vessels, the woman is in Charge. A Cheating man will not put his pennis inside a hole or Pipe if there is no woman to open her legs for her, the worst he will do is to go to a prostitute which is a shame and a disgrace on him and he might not find that convinient either. A woman should be Priceless and not a cheap commodity.

Dicky said...

I love that word #The eggs always get broken. My dad used to say that the only thing that's secret is that thing that has not been done.

Dicky said...

@Joy... & thot u have a point ba? Anyway, when u r ready to cheat on ur man (if u will ever have) I will be ready u dig u down & out

Anonymous said...

This few minutes of sexually related love will definitely cost you a lifetime of home related love. Sex is just an aspect of a marriage institution. If he aint putting his best, help him improve it to your taste. All for the sake of that family you claim to Cherish. KENEVICTOR

Anonymous said...

This few minutes of sexually related love will definitely cost you a lifetime of home related love. Sex is just an aspect of a marriage institution. If he aint putting his best, help him improve it to your taste. All for the sake of that family you claim to Cherish. KENEVICTOR

Unknown said...

Nothing is hidden o, if its done it must be known

Anonymous said...

This few minutes of sexually related love will definitely cost you a lifetime of home related love. Sex is just an aspect of a marriage institution. If he aint putting his best, help him improve it to your taste. All for the sake of that family you claim to Cherish. KENEVICTOR

Dicky said...

What she doesn't know is that some people are expert in frying som1 else's 'akara' while their own 'akara' is rotting @ home. She sud b alert 2 d fact dt whatever done stealthily dey alwys dey sweet. Make she go ask how boring d man is to his wife @ home

Anonymous said...

The kettles,the pots and the name callers.

Diary of Dido said...

Reminds me of my tommytalky...
Always a friend, forever in my heart.
God bless you, black n' proud. :).
However, loving someone means being selfless enough to let go.

Anonymous said...

Noted! what about the lady that needs your advise ni??

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Essential matter this!!!

Wale of Life said...

Lolz...soon she will expect they text messages, they will never come. The calls will stop, as the guy has 'seen her finish' he will move on then what next? Go back to her husband? God help her if he hasn't founnd out by then cos shez gonnna loose out both ways...the feelings shez having right now is just what anybody would feel wen u meet a new "friend" I guess she had always had the tendency to cheat anyway.

Unknown said...

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Unknown said...

Hehehe!See heavy gobe here oh.
Dear woman, you are so playing with fire. Retrace your steps and go back to your home now!That is all i have for you.

Anonymous said...

Most sensible comment here. Lady, you can't eat your cake and have it too. You will loose in 3 ways, your boyfriend ( don't make the mistake to think he will ever leave his wife for you), your husband and the only victim of your stupidity, your children. If the spice in your relationship has dwindled, find ways to spark it up, get marriage counseling. You don't want to stop, child, you will stop when the time comes. When your marriage collapses and that safe haven you think is your boyfriend shows you hiswife Iis more important than you. Child, you are not the first nor will you be the last to creep around your husband, but I can tell you, the cheater always looses.

Anonymous said...

Nothing, it wasn't meant to be thats why. I have exactly, dead-on the same situation as you and you know what I did? Nothing. Im still single, he is married with a son and I plan on doing nothing. He n I weren't meant to be. If 10-12 yrs ago, they'd tell me he n I would not be married, id say it was a fat lie. When he n I talk, he tells me the bibiggest mistake of his life was not marrying me or finding a way for us to be together, and I feel the same. Every guy I've since dated, it has never been complete, there was always something missing. You know 3 months before he got married, he wanted to meet with me to know if there was something there, I had the strict family syndrome issue. He got married without he or I knowing, but when you love someone, you just do, there's no switch to turn it off. So, I cut off contact with him, but the feelings is still there. I moved states away. Because I know if ever we make the mistake of being in the same state, something will happen, the feelings are still there. Its suppressed but still there, but I do nothing. Move on dear, find who your is, the feeling you have for him will never go away as long as you are human, but you are in control.

Anonymous said...

I hav dis same issue in my relationsp.my boyfriend isnt intresting anymore.and I ve cheated on him.n he loves me so much dat if I leave him he wil b broken.It has gotten to d xtent dat I cant stand him..but i am tryin nw.I havnt cheated dis year.but I chat love chat wit oda guys more dan I chat wit him.n I mastubate so he wont touch me n I wont hav sexual congeal.so confused.........

Anonymous said...

Then stay single for life. Silly kid, that na child talk, you hear. So you will say bc car accident happened on the road to work, you wont drive or that because someone choke on food, you won't eat again. You better don't turn yourself into a failure bc you never want to try for fear of failing. Has failure ever killed anyone? Ehn, if you fail at something be it in your marriage, at work or at school, you learn what not to do again, dust yourself off and try again, for if you don't, then you have failed by default.

Anonymous said...

Lolz.

Anonymous said...

Well, if women are like children, then men are like dogs. The only stupid thing I wont do is generalize like you. Listen here ol boy, get that alpha male mentality out of your mind you hear, or else, you will go intoba marriage half committed and your wife will notice and she will go find yhe remaining half outside to makd it complete. Then you'll know your wife is not a child but smarter than you in every sense. Stupidest comment ever. Women are like children, the nerve of some idiots.

www.promonigeria.com said...

Nice writeup

Anonymous said...

@anon 2.00pm u said it all. True talk. I love ur frankness. May God give us his grace at all times to make us do good always bcos really,e no easy.

www.promonigeria.com said...

Funny

Omobola Alfred said...

Ahn ahn..ewo lepe???is it bcz itz a woman?if na man u won't say tinz like diz o..plss..if u don't av anytin gud to say den dnt say anytyn at all..hian

Omobola Alfred said...

Ask God for your own man.that is what you should do.

Omobola Alfred said...

Hmmmm..wt makes u think she is loose???huh..y'all b actin like a saint..r u beta???

Omobola Alfred said...

Ask God for your own man.that is what you should do.

Omobola Alfred said...

Ahn ahn..ewo lepe???is it bcz itz a woman?if na man u won't say tinz like diz o..plss..if u don't av anytin gud to say den dnt say anytyn at all..hian

Omobola Alfred said...

God bless yu..am loving ur comment

Omobola Alfred said...

We no dey MFM ooo..welcome to linda ikeji's blog...hahahhaha..which one b say make she die..na ur brother she marry???

Omobola Alfred said...

May God help yu to be stronger and faithful..it is well with you.

Omobola Alfred said...

Ok.we have seen you..no exceptions..be it Man or woman!

Omobola Alfred said...

Oh my days..u got me laughing..na real DNA test!!!marital infidelity is so overrated in Nigeria..yu r right..dis so called men...I comment ma reserve..buh I love ur comment

Anonymous said...

@zino 11:13am urs is d craziest comment here. U sure cracked me up with dat...lol

Omobola Alfred said...

Thanks honey..yu av spoken well

Omobola Alfred said...

Oh my days..u got me laughing..na real DNA test!!!marital infidelity is so overrated in Nigeria..yu r right..dis so called men...I comment ma reserve..buh I love ur comment

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Omobola Alfred said...

Ok.we have seen you..no exceptions..be it Man or woman!

Omobola Alfred said...

Ok..I want to speak..hehe..it beats me when men put out so much anger when yu refuse dem in bed,y wud er "husband" be insensitive to the fact that she myt jst be tired..and jst maybe cuddling and swit caressing wud du for the night..men don't know that they enjoy sex better and d female gets d pain of it..u r a man and yu come home every night with the tot of having sex with ur wife,dt is appaling..except if she is a sex person..buh majority of women out there can always pass for months without it..know ur partner and wt works for yu..sex is not food!men take note pls

Anonymous said...

I'm married and I can tell you that you're so in point. Even from the story above, the husband always wanted sex but his wife would not give, but she's comfortable giving it to her so called boyfriend. What rubbish!!!!! If the husband was denying her sex, she would be complaining. Shewas denying her husband and cheating on him in addition.

Unknown said...

I'm in a similar situation right now. But you know what, my dear, he's taken means he's taken. If he really loved you, he would have looked for you or waited.
Even if he divorces his wife to marry you, know that someday, he'll also get tired of you.
Peace

Anonymous said...

The woman just said she was denying hr husband sex which always infuriated the husband. She's just more comfortable doing it outside. What happened to communication. I'm married and my wife doesn't like discussing sex especially if it has to do with how we can improve our sex life.

Unknown said...

I usually advice that men that aren't so good in bed should allow their women 'use' them. Allow her go all the way on you. With time, you'll learn her tricks.
Truth is sex is as important to women as it is to men. If not more.

Anonymous said...

The woman said she was denying her hubby sex which used to make him fussy. She's just comfortable doing it her boyfriend.

Anonymous said...

The most senseless comment so far

Anonymous said...

God bless you

JBayo said...

Good eye opener though. But the woman has lowered her value and worth before her boyfriend. While her boyfriend see himself as a conqueror and irresistible, she equally make her man a fool to her boyfriend. Why could she not express her sexual feelings to her husband after her first sex encounter with this boyfriend. Communication is very significant in marriage. Both partners learn from each other how to be touched, caresses, kiss and have sex on regular basis. Desire change from time to time. Woman, pls repent and teach your husband how you want him make love to you.
-----JBayo-----

Anonymous said...

The most sensible analysis so far
God blesss....

Anonymous said...

woman see how ungrateful u are,despite the fact that your husband is so caring and had the quality of a good husband, and very hard to see a good hubby nowadays.There is a cliche that says "you'll never no the quality of what you have you have until u lost it". woman before it get too late go back to your hobby.

Anonymous said...

Now am even scared of getting married...God have mercy.

Anonymous said...

Some men are just heartless and take their wives for granted.once in a while,it is good for them to know that (we too can be bad)enjoy yourself ,girl,while it lasts.

Anonymous said...

Testies

Anonymous said...

Eni to lori ko ni fila, eni to ni fila ko lori, some women desire a husband like urs, but they dnt have, instead they have cheaters as hubby n they still remain faithful praying to God to touch their hubby hrt. Appreciate what you have before you loose it.A word is enuf for the wise.

Thestylegalaxy said...

Ok oooooooooooo!

Anonymous said...

Omobola, would u mind if ur husband got an "assistant" for u?

Unknown said...

Omobola, you are bias and one sided here, sounding like a feminist who just wanted to protect her fellow sex. The truth is, some men don't realise what works for their wives but the wives on their own part too don't make them. Here is a case of infidelity that has eroded the very fabric of the institution called marriage and often times, the husbands have always being at the receiving end. Being accused of inability to control their hormones, lust etc . The table has since been turned and the wives too now catch their fun with unrestricted libido and all u can say is 'men are insensitive '. Agreed, men should be more sensitive because most wives now are no better than roadside prostitutes.

Anonymous said...

Charly Boy is right - wahala dey. This lady is not alone. However, I think that if she wants to play the game, she needs to play it the way the men do. her home cannot suffer because of her transient affair. I say "transient" because it WILL end. And she should not be naive enough to believe that it can be otherwise, as she cannot keep up the charade forever. Except she is thinking that the man will leave his wife for her?
It is so exciting now, sweet & fresh as she put it, because it is all "under-G"; the thrill and allure of the clandestine. If she married him, will it still be so exciting?
Marriage does become mundane - the day to day exposure to each other causes visual, audio, sensory, emotional and even olfactory fatigue. A constant & sustained exposure to a stimulus guarantees a numbing of one's senses such that the stimulus in question becomes "part of the furniture", so to speak.
The trick is to be aware of this and WORK AT NOT LETTING IT BE THE NORM!! Dating is not just for the single; neither are romance or clandestine lunch quickies. If husband are wife are committed, "See Finish" syndrome symptoms can be greatly diminished.
Just my two kobo!

ZeeZee said...

The devil comes to steal, kill and destroy!!! That's all you need to hear... he is already stealing from you. Find a pator befoe he executes the last two on you by the way, the same way your husband thinks you can never cheat on him and you are is the same way you think of him and he is!!!If he has no time to notice your cheating he'e getting his grove. May Karma spare you

Unknown said...

I hope you get caught very soon.AMEN

Unknown said...

You're joking right? Well in case you don't know,here's what will happen to you. You will leave your present boyfriend, move to your present lover, then he will become uninteresting to you cos another guy will come along with sweet words and promises of ecstasies, and then the cycle continues till you get married and become unfaithful to your hubby and it continues. My dear,your watch word should be " Fear of God and Self control". Practice them now so you'll get perfect soon enough.

Elsmama said...

Interesting... Fact remains this wasnt all about sex when she started off they didnt have sex for almost a year this implies something was wrong in her marriage other than the sex matter she lacked affirmation and was getting it elsewhere in my opinion this started as an emotional cheating before the physical. I pray you come to your senses and try to work out things with your husband

kimora Egbamuno said...

If he wants sex,give him and if she wants sex,give her after all u signed up for it,a totful man wld knw wen his wife aint in d mood and a totful woman wld knw wen her husband aint in d mood..sexual misunderstanding or miscommunication btwn man and wife is absolutely no reason for any1 to be unfaithful,I am married and like every human I have my days,sometimes I wanna strap my husband to d bed and sometimes I just wanna be cuddled or even left alone and dis feeling is mutual but its still no reason for me to be unfaithful or for my husband to be unfaithful, communication is key,as awkward as it may seem,talk about how u wanna be touch or treated sexually,tell him or her how u like it,infact direct ur spouse, also knw dat understanding is key cos he or she may not do it how u like it but keep communicating wit love and respect,u shld neva give any1 d chance to treat u better dan ur spouse wld,dats u being insensitive and selfish,once u start comparing some1 wit ur spouse dey lose value in ur eyes, in my dictionary,dont call me baby cos u aint my man,dont give me a special pet name cos I will swear 4 u,dont call me unnecessarily I aint customer care cos nah Goodmorning dey lead to how re u ....#enufsaid

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