Airtel

Tuesday, August 6, 2013

'The principle of mumuism as practiced in mumu kingdom' - Lágbájá

This is a must read article written by Afrobeat musician, Lágbájá, in response to an article written by Okey Ndibe. You will find Mr Ndibe's article after the cut but first read this one from masked one...
Dear Okey Ndibe: Thank you for sounding the alarm in a way that should make us reflect deeper. Mumu is not a condition I proudly proclaim. It was with a heavy heart that I came to this shocking realization that we are indeed a country of mumus. Harsh as it might sound, no other explanation would suffice. It is apparent that the “leaders” know that they would always get away with whatever incredible schemes they concoct because, amongst other reasons,
(a) the mumu people they “lead” are no different from their mumu “leaders” in character
(b) the mumu people are gullible, superstitious and naive
(c) there are no consequences for criminal acts if you belong to the right group
(d) these mumus never demand accountability from their “leaders”
(e) the mumus expect their rulers to loot or would otherwise consider them foolish
Apologies for the seeming overgeneralization but the vast majority runs with this mumu mindset.
There is a limit to how much one can squeeze into a song before sounding less music than sermon. Please permit me to expatiate using your perimeter of “recent events in the past week or two”.
For simplicity I would use a numbered list to analyze and highlight a few seemingly disparate but absurd mumurity examples and indicators.
1. 5 members trying to impeach a governor would make you think there are probably only 6 or 7 members of the House of Assembly. According to the assembly’s website there are 31 members. For mumus, 5 out 31 constitutes a majority.
2. In the land of mumus you can make your own mace and confer it with automatic authority, elect a “new Speaker” and swear him in.
3. No single hospital in Nigeria to entrust the unfortunately injured member with. He had to be flown to the UK.
4. Flown abroad … likely on tax payers’ account
5. Treated … likely on tax payers’ account
6. Visited by officials… likely on tax payers’ account (business or first class tickets?)
7. Nyesom Wike the Minister of State who led the visit was until recently the Governor’s (Amaechi’s) Chief of Staff. He was allegedly nominated for the Ministerial position by Governor Amaechi.
8. Shouldn’t the mumus wonder how Nyesom Wike as Minister of State for Education found the time for this all important trip while abandoning his post in spite of the raging crisis in his ministry with the Academic staff union of Nigerian universities currently on strike? Well the mumu staff and students can rot in hell I guess.
9. Madam Patience would probably have “visited” too, if not for the noise such would generate. So for now, the victim suffers alone.
10. The erstwhile pontificating police boss of the State could not find the patient’s prominent attacker for over a week.
11. Madam Patience having first denied any involvement in the crisis while verbally attacking Soyinka, eventually owns up “pouring out her grievances”.
12. She owns up to a group of visiting Bishops who came on a peace making mission to find a lasting solution to the crisis in their region. Religion is always an easy scapegoat and tool of deception in mumudom.
13. Why would you even think that the Bishops would go back empty handed? Any “transport fare/thank-you-for-coming”, if received, would have likely been financed on tax payers’ account.
14. And why are we ranting about “tax payers”? Why are the tax payers not furious over the incessant misappropriation and misapplication of their hard earned contributions? The answer lies in the question… Aside from PAYE, how many are compliant in mumudom?
15. First a set of 5 Governors and 3 Deputy Governors (representing their respective Governors), left their duty posts for a solidarity visit with the embattled Governor of Rivers State… of course to the detriment of tax payers. (a) They were not on leave, but left urgent work and duties behind for the “emergency” solidarity visit. (b) Flight to and fro Port Harcourt of course likely on tax payers’ account.
16. They were closely followed by a second set of 4 commiserating sympathetic Governors. Of course, again likely on tax payers’ account.
17. Madam Patience’s grievance, as she divulged to the visiting Bishops, started when Governor Amaechi refused to be governed by her, as he would not listen to her veiled orders on how to govern the State… which incidentally is her primary territory being her State of origin. Mumus have no problem with that, fully being in harmony with her as she sings as first lady in Abuja while simultaneously dancing in absentia as Permanent Secretary in Bayelsa and conducting the orchestra in home state, Rivers.
18. Madam ends her confession to the Bishops by saying that Amaechi is her son as she is obviously the mother of everyone in mumudom. The question all mumus should ask is, “Would a good mother promote the demise of her child?”
19. Where was her outraged sense of motherhood when Senators were busy voting to turn mumudom into a Nation of pedophiliacs at the expense of her innocent “daughters”?
20. Where was her outraged sense of “mother of the Nation” when the video of 5 gang rapists went viral. Has she used that “mother of the Nation” power to find the culprits? Not a priority in mumudom.
21. Where was her outraged “motherhood of mumudom” when 46 school children were murdered in Yobe? Indeed the whole Nation of mumus have just gone on with their more important mumu lives like nothing happened.
22. Which brings us to the insane mumurity that gives the “leaders” confidence to try pranks such as the attempt at crafting the under age marriage law, knowing that with the mumus… “nothing go happen”
23. In the land of mumus, the rulers know they can always throw in the religious card, so Senator Yerima leads the child slavery onslaught with the religious chant.
24. While all this was going on, 79 year old OPC founder, Dr. Fasheun was, in his own description, “delivering” Mustapha to Kano.
25. Soon after, Gumsu Sani Abacha had the courage to rant on social media about her proud heritage… because with the mumus who his father savagely ruled over… nothing go happen.
26. Gumsu even called Soyinka who was a victim of her beloved dad’s misrule, “Mad empty Professor” … because in mumudom, “nothing go happen”.
27. Final scores… Jang 13, Amaechi 19, but in the land of mumus Mathematics has a different interpretation for 13 is greater than 19. Even the President of the mumus ratifies that.
28. By the way, both Governors Jang and Amaechi are from the same imploding political party.
29. Jang says he is old enough to be Amaechi’s father… a common escape route that is often quickly bought by the mumu populace. Old enough to be the President’s pawn and to upturn justice might be more like it. Only possible when you know for sure that your people are mumus… Nothing go happen.
30. The Governor is supposed to be the chief security officer of his State, but apparently in mumudom, his Police Commissioner is his boss.
31. The Governor’s security staff could be so easily withdrawn because nothing is institutionalized in a Nation of mumus. The loyalty of the security personnel is not based on the constitution but on personal or maternal affiliations. The mumus keep watching because “it does not concern me o”… “Big men and women are fighting”. Same way the injustice of the Nation’s attorney general’s assassination does not concern them.
32. Most reports in the Nigerian media kept referring to the self appointed Speaker as if he were truly the substantive Speaker. A mere use of “self-acclaimed” would have been logical, but they were already calling him the Speaker because… ignorance? inducement? resignation to the belief that the 5 vs 26 Assembly coup was already a done deal?
33. While all this drama unfolded, Nigeria, like the proverbial head-burying ostrich felt it had the moral right to insist on democratic processes in Egypt.
34. Sahara Reporters had screamed about the underhand conspiracy to proclaim Mustapha “not guilty”. Mumus simply went about their daily mumurity unperturbed because “it doesn’t concern them”. And when it happened as predicted… no problem. Mumus continue dem jolly as if nothing happened.
35. Meanwhile, Daniel and his political supporters carried their politics into the house of God at Rueben Abati’s mother’s funeral service… simply because there is no true reverence for God. Religion is a safe hiding cave. The mumus in the congregation would never protest such sacrilege because… “it is not strange” as the houses of God are now also political grounds. Obasanjo built one in Abeokuta. Jonathan got one built in Otuoke.
36. Meanwhile, some other mumus were again busy putting the Nation to international shame. In unprecedented match fixing fiascos, Police Machine beat Bubayaro 67-0 while Plateau United Feeders beat Akurba FC 79-0. Just in case you are confused, the game was soccer, not basketball.
37. The matches were to determine which one of the two tied teams would be promoted into… wait for this… just the 3rd division of the Nigerian soccer league. How many goals would they have to orchestrate when they want promotion to the 1st division?
38. Interesting to note that one of the teams involved in these shows of shame, the Police Machine, represents the Police Force. Now who would investigate this scandal?
39. Mumus involved in the conspiracy had to include players… team management… referees and other match officials… spectatorshuh That is quite a large mumu cooperative.
40. Since four teams were involved, multiply the number of conspirators by 4 (except match officials and spectators which should be multiplied by “only” 2). Hence, the scam was done in the open. It was a confident public show of shame. No… two confident simultaneous scams. No problem as corruption is everywhere.
41. Before the matches, Police Machine and Plateau United were level on points, goal difference and goals scored, and each was playing its final match which would determine which team would get elevated into the 3rd division league. Plateau United scored 72 of its 79 goals in the second half, thereby averaging more than one goal per minute. This would necessarily include the time needed to celebrate each goal, retrieve the ball, bring it back to the center, wait for the referee’s whistle before kicking off again…. after each goal. 72 times. Or did they just write the preferred figures as we typically do on election day?
42. Is it not curious that neither of the two losing teams could manage a single consolation goal? What else are we if not mumus?
43. Then there was the innocent man who was freed by the high court in Owerri after having been unjustly incarcerated for seven years, “awaiting trial”. No compensation… nobody held accountable for his ordeal. He insisted on being taken back to the prison as that was his only guaranty of a roof over his head and a daily meal. It was merely a “small thing” in the daily bizarre news as mumus went about their daily mumurity with their typical mentality of “e no concern me”.
44. Remember that this is mostly a snippet of the past two weeks or so. But there is more… 20 year old Chijioke Nwankor allegedly Molests a 9 year old pupil to death in Calabar. Reportedly in his own words, he asked her to bend down in the uncompleted building because it was too dirty to lie down as the place was being used as a public toilet. That is mumudom parlance for faeces shamelessly defecated all over the ground. Could the defecation be by aliens from outer space?
45. Well… thankfully, there is always a little ray of sunlight sneaking through the dark jungle. A Briton who was kidnapped by an armed gang shortly after arrival in Lagos, has been released.

…All in just the past two weeks or so in mumudom.

Excuse me, I have to return to work. I need to earn £3000 for my British visa. Wait a minute, did I tell you I am still a Commonwealth citizen?
Lágbájá


Okey Ndibe's article below
The masked phenomenon known simply as Lagbaja is one of the few Nigerian musicians whose art is inspired by the late Fela Anikulapo-Kuti. In keeping with the Felaian spirit, Lagbaja’s act and art combine prodigious, heart-thumping entertainment with a political message that, at its eloquent best, has the powerful effect of summing up the Nigerian “condition.”

Fela, for example, flung the word “zombie” in our faces. In the heydays of military rule, when our uniformed men exhibited the complex of mini, mindless gods – flinging the lash at hapless civilians or shooting at the slightest provocation – Fela’s term captured that syndrome of senseless, rampaging power. The way Fela deployed the word was deeply penetrating. “Zombie” entered Nigerians’ social lexicon, a handy word for all battered or potentially battered subjects of military despotism. The word entrenched itself as the most natural way to describe the military honchos who ruled (and ruined) us. It also described the antics of the uniformed minions who – forgetting that they were victims of misrule – seemed ever willing to keep the rest of us in line, to still voices of dissent, to serve any regime with rabid, ferocious efficiency.

Fela also gave us “ITT,” deconstructing the name of an international telecommunications corporation headed by the late Moshood Kashimawo Abiola to yield a new term: “International Thief Thief.” His song, “Beast of No Nation,” proclaimed the collective bastardry of the Nigerian society just as his “Overtake Don Overtake Overtake” (ODOO) is a shorthand for anomie.

Today, it is Lagbaja, I suggest, who has offered us the handiest name for our collective malady. In a recent song that should become as much an anthem as Fela’s “Zombie,” Lagbaja famously calls Nigerians 200 million mumu. The word mumu is a quintessentially Nigerian word, its rich inflections and negative connotations derived from its pedigree. It translates (rather prosaically) as a fool, a buffoon, a person susceptible to scams and other forms of trickery.

In the lyrics, Lagbaja names some of the big men who have shaped – that is to say, misshaped – Nigeria: Ibrahim Babangida, Sani Abacha, and Olusegun Obasanjo. But there’s an unusual, jolting twist in the song. As the listener settles to it, expecting to hear the familiar “yabis” – words of insults usually lobbed at the country’s past and present misrulers – Lagbaja turns his barbed tongue on the so-called “ordinary” Nigerian, the “followers.” In his worldview, all Nigerians are part and parcel of the fabric of corruption and oppression that the unfortunate among us bemoan.

In Chinua Achebe’s fourth novel, A Man of the People, one of the characters earns a chilly, censorious look when he teases the ill-educated, prototypically corrupt politician, Chief M.A. Nanga, with an old joke: “MA, minus opportunity.” Lagbaja uses a similar linguistic move on all of us. Nigerians, all of us, are corrupt – he seems to say – minus opportunity. At any rate, Lagbaja sees the lot us as mumu, collaborators in our own oppression and debasement, architects of our collective misfortune.

At first glance, Lagbaja’s would appear to be a harsh, excessive and even misplaced indictment. But it’s hard to deny that there’s a vital sense in which the musician is right on target. In fact, it’s impossible to undertake any retrospective of events in Nigeria without coming to the conclusion that too many Nigerians act as fertilizers for the malaise that plagues and wrecks their lives.

Let’s take some of the recent events from the past week or two.

We’ve watched – some riveted with peculiar glee – as politicians from Rivers State darted onto the stage to offer us a veritable theater of the absurd. In an act of particular impunity, four or five members of the state assembly attempted to stage a spurious impeachment of the speaker and to replace him with one of their number. Backed by powerful politicians in Abuja (including, some suggest, President Goodluck Jonathan and his wife), these legislative renegades were prepared to act on the proposition that they outnumbered 27 or so other lawmakers loyal to the speaker they sought to remove.

A physical fight ensued to settle this sordid, “political” arithmetic. In the melee, one legislator seized a make-shift mace imported by the Abuja-backed renegades and used it to batter a colleague, Michael Chinda – a member of the Abuja Collective. Numerous videos of the fracas have gone viral on youtube. In them, we see so-called lawmakers who should have been on Nigeria’s boxing team at the London Olympics. We see the police at their inefficient worst, unable to control a rowdy gathering of thuggish legislators and their hired thugs. We see one of the lawmakers ready to kill or die because the state governor, Chibuike Rotimi Amaechi, had insulted his “mother,” aka Patience Jonathan, aka (the fuming pugilist’s) “Jesus Christ on earth.”

I wrote a few weeks ago that there was no substantive principle at play in the political crisis in Rivers State – or in any location in Nigeria, for that matter. It’s all a game about who gets to steal the most from the commonwealth and who gets To Molest the people. Neither faction in the dispute is actuated by the public good. Power, the acquisition of raw power for self-aggrandizement, is the governing motivation.

If Mrs. Jonathan now functions as divinity, a “Jesus Christ on earth,” then her husband, who fancies himself a “transformational leader,” must occupy a special seat in any gathering of leaders, dwarfing such figures as Barack Obama, David Cameron, Angela Merkel, and Paul Kagame. Yet, the terribly injured Chinda could find no hospital within the precincts redeemed by Mrs. Jonathan and transformed by her husband for treatment. Instead, it was to Mr. Cameron’s Britain that the battered Chinda was flown for urgent surgery.

Here’s a safe bet: Mr. Chinda is not spending a penny of his money to pay his bills at the Bupa Cromwell Hospital in Britain. There’s a chance that the hospital demanded and received full payment before commencing treatment. At any rate, those bills will be paid with public funds, most likely provided by his sponsors in Abuja.

The arrangement makes a mumu of all of us who accept this daylight abuse of public resources. Nigerian lawmakers, state as well as national, are paid obscene sums of money. Yet, they hardly ever use the instrument of the law to address the crises that menace the lives of Nigerians – including a non-existent healthcare system. Instead, they gallivant, carouse, undertake meaningless jamborees in Nigeria and abroad, and – when it suits them – take to boxing. They hardly work, but when they fall sick, they travel to such addresses as Britain, Germany, South Africa and India where people work hard and use their brain power.

As if Chinda’s transfer to a British hospital was not wasteful enough, last week a group of his backers, including a junior minister, Nyesom Wike, flew to London to commiserate with him. The odds are excellent that the government in Abuja paid for the flight tickets and hotel accommodation of the five or so well-wishers – to say nothing of spending cash. Mr. Wike and his team must not know how ludicrous they appear to their British hosts; they have no idea how the British would use them as the butt of jokes: Here are these Africans who have too much money but not a bit of sense to do anything for themselves!

It’s an altogether awful picture. I doubt that Mr. Chinda has sponsored a single bill that improved the lives of the people of Rivers State by a jot. Instead, he lent himself as a stooge to carry out the designs of those in power in Abuja, determined to lay waste to his state. He is injured serving this despicable agenda. And then Nigerians, including the hapless people of his home state, must pay the tab for his treatment in London. A statement released by Mr. Wike’s team underscored the ridiculousness of it all. It began: “Prominent leaders of Rivers State from across political and professional divides on Saturday visited the member representing Obio/Akpor State Constituency 2 at the Bupa Cromwell Hospital in London, United Kingdom, where the legislator is recuperating from head and jaw surgeries carried out on him by medical experts in the health facility.” Then it stated that “the leaders were grateful to God for the survival of Hon. Michael Chinda despite the vicious knocks he received from the mace-wielding Majority Leader of the Rivers State House of Assembly, Mr. Chidi Lloyd.”

These parasites, shameless consumers of other people’s products and enterprise, are the kind of characters who pass for “leaders” in Nigeria. There are also figures like Ango Abdullahi, a saber rattling jingoist who insists that Nigeria’s presidency must be turned over to a “northerner” or there will be mayhem. Even though Mr. Abdullahi wears the prefix of professor, he doesn’t evince any interest in stellar leadership. It suffices for him that somebody from the so-called North – any “northerner,” however mediocre or visionless – assume the presidential office.

It all boils down to clownishness. I’m with Lagbaja: the fact that the vast majority from all parts of Nigeria permit certifiable clowns to pollute and deform our lives makes us 200 million mumu inhabiting a perfect mumudom!

147 comments:

vroomangel said...

Hmmm am watching

★★PRINCE CHARMING™★★ said...

"Mumulity" 101!! I love Lagbaja's piece, a use of comprehensive Lexis and a blend of local pidgin to drive home his message. He exposes the haphazard polity we face in Nigeria added with a set of unscrupulous leaders with a heart filled with unquenchable avariciousness!

IfyCynthetic said...

Sorry I have exams to write and succeed in so I can't read all that epistle. First few lines and I got the gist

BONARIO NNAGS said...

hmmmm what we need is to match our words with action.
The event of Rivers state can happen in any part of the country. injustice anywherr is a threat to justice everywhere.

~BONARIO~says so via NOKIA3310

Yemmie Oscar said...

Honestly! I think it's boring.
*no pun intended

hameedat said...

I weep for my country!!

Hrm paul ojeih said...


He who has ears let him speak the mask one has finally spoke

Anonymous said...

"Hmmm I'm watching is a Mumu statement vroomangel is a mumu.

Anonymous said...

LIB chief grammarian himself! PC i hail o

Anonymous said...

E jo oti gun ju!

Anonymous said...

True Talk..Lagbaja
I feel the 1st step in releasing us from Mumuism is enlightment.
Most Nigerians have already imbibed the spirit of ''its none of my business,,i gat my own worries''..Op a lotta pple read this and start enlightning pple starting 4rm demselves #peace

Segun said...

Hmmm..... Sigh. I am tempted to say this case called Nigeria is a hopeless one. O ma se o.

orela dimples said...

yea mumudom....
Mumu monarchy....
na wa for naija
true word most nigerians complaining are worse than the elect.

Mich said...

Bloody hell!
I'm on feet for this piece.
I'm only gonna point out two things from Lagbaja's piece.
1.Religion;it's rather unfortunate that religion has become the bane of the Nigerian society today.
Why in God's creation are a group of Bishops going to see the First Lady over such an issue?isn't the church plagued with enough troubles for them to bother about?I mean,a recent study just showed that if Christians don't go back to their evangelical way and carry out rural/urban evangelisms like they did in the early 60's to 80's,the religion might go extinct in the next 50years.
Also,Why the bloody hell would an obvious peadophile use Islam to back up his ungodly desires?
Simple!Nigerians are so bloody gullible when it comes to Religion,he knows that Muslim fanatics would back him up so he employs the religion card.The earlier we all realize that God's neither a Christian nor Muslim,the better it is for us all.
Need I bring in Karl Marx's immortal words;Religion is the ...(you the rest).
2.Why do Nigerains pride about their age as if that in itself is a yardstick for measuring success and maturity?
Imagine Jonah Jang saying he is older than Amaechi therefore,He's better than Ameachi.How dumb can one get?
Patience Jonathan claiming She's the mother of the nation and Amaechi is young enough to be her son..really?I'm no supporter of Amaechi before anyone thinks I'm being bias.
We always want to be worshipped because of how old we are;total gibberish.I don't respect age,I respect genuine maturity.
This explains why those old politicians can't let go because they feel my generation is way too young and illiterate to lead,they think they are better than us because they are older than us.
Age is not a guarantee for success,get it?
Finally,thank goodness for where I'm now cos its beyond glaring that there's gonna be a revolt in that country pretty soon...how prepared are you?
MUMU!

Anonymous said...

Nigerians are not ready to WORK for change.

Anonymous said...

Facts. One day na one day

ib said...

what can we do to stop all this?*tears in my eyes*

Anonymous said...

lagbaja Please watch the kind of word you use for your country.

ANYA IKENGA said...

LET EVERY ORDERLY TURN HIS GUN ON HIS CORRUPT POLITICIAN OGA. AND CONVERGE ON EAGLES SQUARE ON OCTOBER 1 2013 FOR THE MOTHER OF ALL PROTEST. AND LET ALL BORDERS BE CLOSED. WE CANT CONTINUE LIKE THIS. WE HAVE 70 MILLION YOUTHS WITHOUT FUTURE.

nella said...

All I see is nonsense... Talk talk is cheap. Lagbaja and his likes are the typical mumus. If he has anything to do about the situation, he should go ahead. Otherwise, everyone should just shut up and stop expecting others to take action.

Anonymous said...

We have heard it all,when will we start demanding for our right because some of us are prepared and ready to take the bull by the horn.Only waiting for go ahead and supporters

Anonymous said...

what can i say???? everyone needs inspiration

Chinedu Mgbemena said...

Giant of Africa...

My mumuity didnt allow me to finish my fellow mumus articles... It's a mumu nation after-all

TobiNigeria said...

Oleku!

Anonymous said...

Truth is bitter!! Whoever wants to take d word MUMU personal....should deal with his or her problems!! Let's stop living in denial "Nigerian politicians see us as fools" like I would alwaz say :" U are treated this way becos u allow it"

Emmanuel Babatunde said...

Am also watching i̶̲̥̅̊n̶̲̥̅̊ 3D.

Read Juicy & Amebor Gist HERE

SamOdoh said...

Habba His Royal Majesty! He hu has EARS let him SPEAK kuma? Habba oga!

Anonymous said...

Honestly I c nothing wrong in d word 'mumu' lagbaja used in order to covey a meaniful piece..its left for dis supposed writer to remove himself from d lots nd any1 that cares to..fact still remains that he's pointing out d issues that dis country is facing let's nto forget that! @xclucivexter

Anonymous said...

Lwkm! Mumuism!
~D great anonymous!

Anonymous said...

Hmm.. So much to read, how many ppl wld be so jobless as to read the entire thing.

Anonymous said...

Like lagbaja says 'majority na corruption, minority na exception', b4 b4 na military today na civilian, until we tell ourselves the truth, we be mumu...n so on. We need to start demanding more from our so-called leaders. Cos last i checked, we elected them, rigging or no rigging.

Anonymous said...

Lagbaja!!!! So beautiful a piece. God bless you.

Anonymous said...

@nella..Mumu times infinity!!!!! Talking is action, using music to communicate is action. The question is what are you doing madam Mumu?

I honestly think this is too deep for Linda Ikeji's blog...waiting for the commenters who will expose their mumuism because in mumu land, mumu can never admit that he is a mumu!

Listen to 200 million mumu (part 1) by Lagbaja, he admits that he is also a mumu but at least first step in the right direction is identifying the issue

55 'CENT said...

The only thing that works in Nigeria is lies,i dont see this country getting better because there is no action taken all what we know is big grammar,lies,complaining,praying,weeping blahblah **we are all mumulidangerous

Anonymous said...

nella what of you? What have you done to change the situation?

Anonymous said...

@nella..Mumu times infinity!!!!! Talking is action, using music to communicate is action. The question is what are you doing madam Mumu?

I honestly think this is too deep for Linda Ikeji's blog...waiting for the commenters who will expose their mumuism because in mumu land, mumu can never admit that he is a mumu!

Listen to 200 million mumu (part 1) by Lagbaja, he admits that he is also a mumu but at least first step in the right direction is identifying the issue.

Anonymous said...

Well I have always said it and I am glad people are starting to agree. The problem in Nigeria is not our leaders, nah the problem is Nigerians. My opinion is that we are way too complacent.

When you hear all these things that are happening in a country of people that are reputed to be smart, one wonders what is happening.

We are all so cowed by the violence our politicians are prepared to undergo to retain their position therefore no one is willing to die first. People are afraid that once you speak out, assasins or the police themselves will come after you. Even when one attempts to speak, there are millions that are ready to tell you to be quiet and live your own life.

In what country will the child of a person like Abacha still have the temerity to speak? Amazing.....

A revolution, not necessarily violent, is needed. We need to make it clear that you don't get rich from being an elected public officer, make it clear that if you dont perform, you get removed; we need to make sure that we have say in who leads us. It shouldnt be leaders that have no credibility that should be telling us who should be the next president. What authority does Babangida have in calling himself a statesman whn hes living on the bloods of Nigerians?

If i go on, I will be writing an essay

adebubler balo said...

Its typical of we Nigerians to get gingered for action thru words n not still act, even when we act we sell ourselves out by collecting bribe(subsidy ralley)...
Its so sad dat no sector in Nigeria is functioning except corruption sector, its so bad dat when kids who just knew their right from left to r earger to make money anywhich way..d present situation in Nigeria

ohhh said...

Lagbaja... one of the most articulated, satirical, engaging reads in a long while. Thank you Sir.

Anonymous said...

"All I see is nonsense... Talk talk is cheap. Lagbaja and his likes are the typical mumus. If he has anything to do about the situation, he should go ahead. Otherwise, everyone should just shut up and stop expecting others to take action." - Nella
I'm so proud of you, you disgusting MUMU!!!!
How dare u open your dirty mouth? What steps have u taken? What have u done? U sit behind a computer and u call this nonsense?
You're all that is wrong with this country... So until u have done something worthwhile about the situation in Nigeria, kindly shut the fuck up.
Just so you know, you and I and everybody moving along like this is none of our business are ALL mumus!
Thanks.

Anonymous said...

Because we have all beeb categorised as Mumu which is right though consideing our not demanding accountability from our Mumu leaders. The thought provoking question is what do we do? How and who should champion our demand for accountability?
Together we all can in our own sphere of life.
Demand accountability and be agent of change. It is not enough to castigate without proferring solution
Uc

Anonymous said...

I lov lov the Lagbaja piece Nigerians are truly over mumu. Our leaders children school abroad, receive best medical care all with our money and we dont blink about that. we even end up celebrating them on their return

Anonymous said...

Lagbaja's piece should be included in the Book of Lamentations of the Nigerian nation

alluring belle said...

Annon 2:17 pm, well spoken.

Sho! said...

This thing long sha...Well written tho..just that it doesn't change a thing*sigh*

White Gardenia said...

All our problems and their causes are known to us.What we need is the solution so that brings to light the proverbial saying, who will bell the cat?

Anonymous said...

After I went through this article, I felt tears rushing to find the way down my eyes.

Anonymous said...

Linda the article is too long *huh*
I couldn't read all

Anonymous said...

much respect for lagbaja. We r all mumu bcos we c all ds tins happen yet we do notin!

IkwerreBoy said...

I think mumudom will soon catch fire.. very soon. I see a revolution and Linda thanks for all this article somehow you are making your readers to read. a good thing.

njideka nkem said...

Rapture next

Revolution!!!! said...

@Anon 2:44, I wish u went on...Ur idea is truthful and sensible! Please my Fellow Nigerian's come let's put a stop to dis menace in our dear country! Am ready to lay down my life if its going to put a stop to this Rubbish and wicked acts of "looters" that calls themselves our leaders!

I need strong minded people who will stand strong on a revolution for our dear Mother Land!! Nigeria must survive... A lot of people is in support of Revolution, all we need now is for majority of the youths to join in this fight for FREEDOM,ACCOUNTABILITY and GOOD GOVERNANCE.

memphis said...

Ibori's birthday party; attended by prominent men and women, traditional rulers and titled individuals. The Creme de la Creme. Celebrating the birthday of a man that has a notorious record of criminality. Today the same people will say, "No light, no good schools, no roads, no hospitals, no security, no kini ko..". MUMU PLC

frank uche said...

The man died who keep quiet in the face of tyranny.

Anonymous said...

Grabs Pop corn n coke... #watchingfromafar

Anonymous said...

Dear Nella, talk is cheap but powerful. As I see it, Lagbaja is telling you what you already know but refuse to accept. Lagbaja is already doing something, he is speaking out which is more than I can say for you and me. One man alone can motivate millions with words. Martin Luther King did it, Nelson Mandela did it as well as numerous others and so can you. These people are human just like you and me. I sometimes wonder what I can do to bring about change in this country. We keep lamenting within ourselves but fail to make a move. If everyone remains pliant like you then we will continue to go downhill. Sincerely I feel I am being taken for a ride by these our leaders(That I am seen as a fool or mumu) sometimes when I see certain actions or non action taken by these leaders, I wonder how or why they had the efforntery to do that to the citezenry. I imagine when decisions are taken and if a sane person at the top objects on behalf of the people being led,s/he would be shut down with the excuse that " they wouldn't question it and if they do it will only be for a while and will forget about it soon and move on" which is exactly what we do. I read Linda's blog as often as I can and there are some stories I read that are unbelievable but true. We comment and blame this and that and throw insults and curses but what can we do as individuals to bring about this change that we all want so badly. It is said that a reponsive and informed citizenry is the best weapon we have against crime. As I write this I am also questioning myself. I want to challenge myself and anyother person who cares about this country to do something. We are not too small or insignificant to bring the change

Anonymous said...

i was in Heathrow airport this morning and the guy handing me my ticket said there have been so many people from PortHarcourt here in the past two weeks. one of them was wearing a 60k pounds wristwatch and when he went to do his VAT got almost 9k back. you all must have so much money in port harcourt. smh. its all these politicians o that came here forming solidarity to chinda. staying in hilton paddington and hilton parklane. can someone please ask whose money they used to do all of this?

Anonymous said...

Lwkmd @hrm u just made my day!

Anonymous said...

i was in Heathrow airport this morning and the guy handing me my ticket said there have been so many people from PortHarcourt here in the past two weeks. one of them was wearing a 60k pounds wristwatch and when he went to do his VAT got almost 9k back. you all must have so much money in port harcourt. smh. its all these politicians o that came here forming solidarity to chinda. staying in hilton paddington and hilton parklane. can someone please ask whose money they used to do all of this?

Rough Diamond said...

All dis mumus talking, we r tired of reading mumu write ups everytime! We want action ooooo! We r tired, I am tired! Action speaks louder than words! Enuf of all dis mumuish talk, we want action!

Adelumola OKUBULE said...

BIG MUUMUU, that's what we all are. How I wished FELA was alive !!!!

Anonymous said...

very funny but true article....Nigerians are too weak, then again if leader like fashola, duke, akwa ibom and enugu ggovernor were able to do something for their states amidst corruption there is no excuse...

Anonymous said...

Na wa oooo mumutically

Anonymous said...

You're the biggest "mumu" of us all.your own no hope *smh

ykiluminati on yahoo plus plus said...

in this our mumudom am just tired of this our president, please help me to ask him when he will start to implement his political agenda for nigerians.
and aunty linda as a fellow mumu we all know the truth but we are not ready to change, so please we/i prefer mumu and bizzare news with gosssips to the news of the malady in our country

Anonymous said...

U r a typical mumu urself!!! Wat can one man do???? D change begins wit us (everybody), we don't av to continue to be Mumus wen we all can do sumtin!!! anytin!!! I seriously weep for all we MUMUS!!!

Anonymous said...

Lol the. Book of what????? Lamentation of Nigerian nation....very funnny.

Anonymous said...

Why we r all mumus.....
Asuu on strike n students at home pinging boyfriends n girlfriends
Child bride law n mothers at home watching africa magic on dstv
Motorists to pay 35,000 for new number plate in spite of bad roads , nobody s bissiness
Mustapha released, dimeji set free by efcc, alamasiegha pardoned , youth busy reading complete sport

Infact we r all mumus in mumu kingdom

Anonymous said...

This is a wake up call,thanks lagbaja @nella I think lagbaja has done what he can within his confines thats lending his voice wit the help of his music. The question should be what can I do to change this situation within my sphere of contact.linda plzzz eh post this,thks

@zinny said...

I Luv dis lagbaja piece...our mumu leaders get away wit anythin while our innocent citizen suffer injustice of d highest order..we nid GOD intervention ASAP..

Anonymous said...

Rough diamond pls no offence but is it not someone dat would bring up d action, atleast dey made dia opinion known through d articles, so dey are not mumu write ups in anyway, dats my opinion,linda plz post dis

Anonymous said...

Well said. What is needed is a cull by stealth of about 200 or so corrupt mofos not fit to be defined by the word leader. Inject the ageing military cabal, stage accidental deaths on the rest, and what would result? OIL BOOM.... Like what happened to Gaddafi,Mubarak, people would lose their fear of retribution and like Arab Spring would act.

Anonymous said...

Which way Nigeria!! I am so disturbed right now...

Ade Adebanjo Esq said...

Nigeria and Nigerians deserve the kind of leadership they have. There's no point complaining or talking about corruption, lack of infrastructure etc. let me ask a simple question, if your brother becomes President or Governor and after maybe 8yrs of holding that position he only comes out with his pension, no mansion anywhere, no bank account laden with looted funds, no fleet of cars etc, 99% of Nigerians will insult & curse such a brother, they will definitely call him a mumu. So what are we telling our leaders when they enter political office, we even go as far as saying things like "its ok to steal so long as you work also", that's why if you dare complain about the performance say for example of Gov Fashola, you may be crucified. cos in the eyes of all of us he has performed creditably well, so it doesn't matter whether he, tinubu & their cronies are unscrupulously making billions from Lagos state every month. What other country would you find the citizens of a state celebrate the birthday and even do a thanksgiving in church, for their former Governor who was jailed for looting money from the treasury of that same state, as was witnessed in Delta State on sunday. Another example of "its ok to steal so long as you work"....abeg abeg lets just face the truth we are a nation of mumu people. The day we start insisting for example that (1) children of public officials must attend schools in Nigeria and in the states they Govern, (2) that public officials and their families must only seek medical care in Nigeria....Nigeria will have World Class Schools and Hospitals, there will be no such thing as an ASUU strike....abeg we mumu sha

Buszbusz said...

Truly a nation(mumudom) of mumurity. Well said...

Anonymous said...

Lagbaja n co mak una start so that we go follow... stop all this long grammar abi una want mak I go die so dat u go use am sing????

Anonymous said...

Verily verily I say unto you, the mumurity of Nigerians is much more than those of their wicked rulers. As the dust of Rivers violence begins to settle, we begin to realise that there are more pertinent questions for the architects of the saga than for Chidi Lloyd. Those who play devil's advocate and serve as willing tools for the scumbags in Abuja should have expected the devils reward by chance. I cannot understand the cry of Nigerians against a man who was brave enough to stand up to the unquestionable demons taking Nigerians for a ride. Injustices stare us in the face everywhere and everyday in Nigeria and we mumur and groan helplessly waiting for natural justice such as; "God de, One day monkey go go market, It is well, God save Nigeria...etc". For how long with this suffering and smiling, my people?

Nengi said...

We have read it and understood it, but yet we have increased in our level of being a "mumu", because at the end we just read it.

Manymen said...

I love Lagbaja's piece. It's spot on. Omo baba mukoko thumbs up for you.

Anonymous said...

They are right. I am a mumu but am stuck as to what to do about it

Anonymous said...

So, Lagbaja is just waking up now to know that he is a mumu? Was he sleeping when 19b US dollar was spent on power with nothing to show? Was he sleeping when a president said 'election is a do or die affair?' Was he sleeping when State house of Assembly members sat in hotels impeaching speakers with few members in States like Anambra, Oyo, Ogun, Ekiti etc during Obasanjo's era? Lagbaja, let it be known that we are no longer 'mumu' so you can not fool us behind your computer. Please, stop talking and act fast. Mandela is a man like you who fought for his country's freedom and he is respected for that today. Are you saying you cannot lead the revolution?

Emmanuel said...

Mumuz

Anonymous said...

Hmmn.d country nids revolution which will no doubt involve blood shed. Karl Marx already said dat until we revolt violently against our oppressors,only den can we achieve a classless society. D fear of death resides in d hearts of Nigerians but c d no of lives dat BH bombings av claimed/wasted.Everyone resigned to deir homes wen armed men roamed d streets during d subsidy rally.We nid 2 be selfless n fight 4 d coming generation if not ours.We r indeed mumus! Deolar

nella said...

Lolz! Anyone who keeps nagging about issues and can't suggest any solution is a MUMU. You all keep repeating what someone else has said previously. And y'all attacking me are first class mumuic zombies.

Anonymous said...

On point, it's synonymous to what PASTOR TUNDE BAKARE said in 2011 'FOOLS RULED BY IDIOTS'. Until the citizenry take the bull by the horn, no change can come from these mumussssssssssssss

Abygirl said...

I can only read dis long write up if it were GST 202.. Linda my eye dey turn me o. Lagbaja I feel u sha

oluwafunmilola oluwole said...

I love Lagbaja's piece,O lord we need ur divine intervention in dis mumudom.

Xtian said...

I love my gossip but am in awe by this piece. Now this is worth reading. In fact this piece is too big for this blog. Mumus read between the lines if you dare . Looooooooooooool

Anonymous said...

Lazy girl!

Anonymous said...

True talk Lagbaja.......but when dis revolution starts naw,we might not see ur "likes"in action oooo....
In d words of Charly boy.....9ja youths,how far?....Bizzi1

LK said...

Lagbaja bin feelin like a saint now when he jus sealed a Glo deal wit one of our corrupt leaders. We all writing are d 200million mumus nd any action taker dat dies for 1min silence is jus a fool. Wise up naijirians, rome wasn't build overnyt

Anonymous said...

1st class mumu

Anonymous said...

It's not meant to be interesting, no pun intended either.

christy love said...

When the head of a fish is rotten, do we not expect maggots to be found in the guts?

I like Labaja piece esp the last satire line; The common 'man' have to work hard for 'our' daily bread.

I want change also, but who would be he first to make the move?

Not me! I am so weak from the daily beatings i get from lack, i don't have the strength to lift a finger up.

http://mytorts.blogspot.com/2013/08/revolution.html

Anonymous said...

Thank you lagbaja
I love you with all my heart.
A true son of Nigeria.
Thank you for this.

HOVAfella said...

Wish I were bullet-proof skinned would ve started the revolution

Anonymous said...

This article should be published on all dailies and read by all and sundry to enlighten Nigerians, knowledge is power nd enlightenment is a duty we owe d people

Anonymous said...

Ummm den u didn't v to come here read d gist nd comment hope u received d attention u were seeking.

noblenenye said...

All these sermon will never make our leaders or the lead change. I keep wondering when Nigeria will change for good.

Anonymous said...

But you have enough time to go thru gossip mags and blogs.

SOLID C said...

Only shallow minded mortals would criticize LAGBAJA or OKEY NDIBE on their articles, cos both of them were spot on. It's a shame a country of enlightened and discerning minds is being led by a bunch of clowns masquerading as leaders! Until we start voting in credible candidates with verifiable antecedent and pedigree we will never move forward. WE MUST ALL COLLECTIVELY REJECT THE MUMU LEADERSHIP SO THAT WE ALL DON'T PERISH IN A MUMU COUNTRY! Good governance is not a souvenir given out at the discretion of any leader anywhere in the world. We must demand it before it is exercised. The earlier Nigerians realise this, the better for our polity. GOD help us!

ruth said...

Nice one there

Make-Up by Teju Tobun said...

After all these plenty mumu write up,and my mumu self reading?...has it changed the mumu situation ?, God save us in this Country...

Anonymous said...

Sm of us cnt realy say much 4rm were we stand n r bn trampd upon.all we nid is 1 strong voice,a voice ready 2 face al challenges n stand strong,nt lik d liks of d nlc leaders.nigerians actualy stood strong n cm out in deir nos 2 protest smtin dey blivd in,but it tuk a meetin of hw mny mins 2 ridicle d cry of millions.fela sang bout it so its nutin new,we al no wots gng on in dis country,so we realy dnt nid anoda song 2 say it al.wot we nid is action.

ibeakwadalam said...

The Mumus are all over the Internet. Just like Lagbaja, I am one too.

They protested against the lifting of subsidy -- yet complain how can 2 billion dollars disappear from the subsidy.

They were asked to come and rally against "child bride" they stayed at home.

Because like most professional protesters, they were not paid. So why 'waste' time protesting.

Yeah, it is the other people's fault. But like Abe Lincoln will say, "Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power".

ebira babe said...

PC all this grammar?for what na?Whew!

Anonymous said...

See d Mumu family he ws talking about! God save dis country! When are u mumus going 2 start taking action, start standing up 4 yaselves!?????? Mumus answer!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Ode! Mumu! Lazy mumu 4 dat matter! If this article is not worth reading!, I don't know what is... Is dere no geninue love 4 dis country and its future generations 4rm any of y'all? Wake up mumus

ugo said...

Una don start to de display una mumuristic tendencies! Mtcheew. This is a time for sober reflection.

Anonymous said...

#2Words.. Thank you!

Anonymous said...

I'm in!!! Who's with me?....... *silence*......... no one else I guess.. 'E no concern me', 'My family is ok', 'we are kuku ma rich'.. Cowards!!!, Mumus.. SAD!

Anonymous said...

I 2nd dat! What an intelligent, yet so simple write up. Easy 4 d mumus to understand at least

Anonymous said...

Gbam!!! Piece worth studying at every Nigerian university final year level, hopefully 2 be inspired 2 not graduate into mumudom n be a confirmed MUMU!

Anonymous said...

we are a nation bound by greed how we got here i can not tell ,But i strongly believe only God can help us , by sending us another moses.

Anonymous said...

It baffles me daily that we a country of over 50 million are inadequate to pull up our leaders for accountability or groom a decent one. We watched as neighboring countries damned all consequences for their rights.. We occupied for 2 days and stopped. Mumu is not the right word ...it is an understatement and insult as mumu's usually have an intellectual disability. So don't let us insult mumu's.....I'd rather not print the real name I would call us Nigerians!!!

Anonymous said...

Federal MUMUpublic of Nigeria (FMN)

Shetu said...

Mumu of life!

Shetu said...

Since u did not read it,u did not get d message behind it and u're supposedly on strike,all u want to read is the latest gist...I pity u oooo
MUMU...

Anonymous said...

What we need is action not long essay

issue said...

Bonario thank God u are not a mumu, people have the opportunity and all they do is talk, they are the mumus, if I get the opportunity and do only talking then be free to call me a mumu too.

Anonymous said...

Got to my mumu office this morning and read this mumu piece. Felt really sorry for my mumu self and the other mumus around me. God help all of us mumus and mumu kingdom. Yawn! Can't blame me if i get back to my mumu life though it was an awesome and thought provoking read.

Anonymous said...

You can't be charging others to take action when all u do is hide behind a mask and sit down in ur house to write. If ure nt ready to table solution and lead towards reformation, maybe u shld shut up. Ure only stating the obvious and we all know our problem. Abeg say something else jawe.

ajibola fasola said...

Beautiful, mind "gingering" piece. All correct sir, Lagbaja!. But U didn't talk about d EXPLOITATIONS by d telecommunication companies, yet dey sign deals worth miilliiionnnsss of naira with naija celebs. Abi na coz U dey among???

Anonymous said...

nella, stay classless. An A grade classless mumu for that matter.

Adefisayo Adefioye said...

What more can one say? The best has been said in the past and nothing was done. Lagbaja is only trying to remind us of who and what we truly are. My mumu citizens, we need actions. Ejooh! Biko! I believe it is never too late.

Adefisayo Adefioye said...

What more can one say? The best has been said in the past and nothing was done. Lagbaja is only trying to remind us of who and what we truly are. My mumu citizens, we need actions. Ejooh! Biko! I believe it is never too late.

Anonymous said...

English shhaa whn e wn finish

Adefisayo Adefioye said...

One just hope say Lagbaja would one day talk about the celebs' lack of genuineness on stage and the waste of money on some of them by the communications company with the same passion he has displayed on this issue of mumu-land we live in. Abi mumu citizens no need know?

Anonymous said...

If the devil has taken something from you, to recover is by force. The leaders have taken our job opportunities, Education, Health care, Good roads, Electricity, Affordable cost of living.***sob***sob, the list is endless. The time for all Nigerians to rise up and fight the good fight of a revolutionary change is NOW.

Dante said...

Haba, mumutically !!!

Anonymous said...

Entertaining piece, for most of use who have not been living under a stone these past years, we already know wat the issue is. If this was your eureka !!! moment then you are previous, like light years behind. You are going to have to catch up quickly. Revolution starts in the mind. Stop being so fucking gullible write your own self help books and DIY a change in your life.

ukeme akpan said...

Gbamest!!!

Anonymous said...

No. 23, I love most.

Anonymous said...

We got to face this issue head on. Until we all agree that we are Mumus,we shouldn't think of a way or ways forward. This is the school of thought I belong to. We should shun the "E no Concern Me" mentality;it's babaric! We are all Mumus. Lagbaja, ure a special Mumu ,with the type of Afrobeat you feed to us;your music is full of merry,u only make us dance unlike Fela. Grow some balls and attack the follies of our society. We are all victims of exploitation by the insensitive government and greedy telecommunication firms. Lagbaja o,this babaric "E no Concern Me" mentality made you colaborate with Glo in cheating subscribers more,brainwashing them that"Yea our company is treating you well"
We are all Mumus!!!
Mumuuuuus!!!!!!!
(Let's respond in unison) Ahoooooooo!!!!
Don Swaggss

Anonymous said...

Are we just gonna act and do something to correct all this anomalies in our system instead of writing boring "comprehensive lexis blended with local pidgin".

Hate trolls said...

Nella u are on point don't mind the brainless clueless idiots that visit a gossip site to make up for their have baked mumu education, coming here to illuminate their ignorance. Anon and your fucked up clones go and read some accredited books and get an education. Retards. No space in heaven for stupid idiots. Go to hell!!!

Alosi said...

Hmm.... Nella and Hate troll...in a pathetic class of their own. Would have been best if you two kept quiet rather than display a rather inferior ability to offer constructive criticism.

In a way, talk is NOT cheap. Words when spoken well and long enough will eventually lead to actions. It's a principle. Words can be used as a tool for motivation. The only thing is let it be positive words. In this, there is hope.

So, Lagbaja, Okey Ndibe and others that have positive things to say, speak on, in due time, the desired actions will follow.

Anonymous said...

@alosi. If you come here to feed your intellect, I worry about your level of intelligence. Please stop illuminating your ignorance. You are the kind dat are always at the wrong place at the wrong time. Idiot spend your valueless time on girly gossip trivia. Call yourself enlightened!!!!

Anonymous said...

So when you finish reading and studying and romancing this write up . How exactly are you going to reference it Harvard style. According to llinda ikeji blog . Mumu grade 1. This is a blog okay. Do u understand what that means idiot. If na education, and research carry you come here, then I worry for your level of intellect.

Anonymous said...

Do a literary review on this 'kiss my ass'

Hate troll said...

@ alosi. I guess you've got your answer. Looooooool!. Analyse dat!

abass said...

Don't just weep, what are we going to do I guest that is what we are suppose to be looking for

abass said...

This is what we are saying, lazy mumu

abass said...

If every nigerians is acting like you nofin wud be done

abass said...

Someone said they call people to come out to protest child bride but no one come out, when are we going to stop all this and be brave and know that is all not just about money. Can we create a platform for addressing this and moving forward plz not just talking.
Contact me on alamutu4bio@yahoo.com

abass said...

You would see people hiding under God,
There is God, God will punish them, God will fyt for us and so on. It is high time we fought for what is ours cuuz the people in Libya didn't just sit and pray, they act. When the govt use soldiers on them, they didn't obey. They said you can't take my obedience no matter what the soldiers do to them, though many dies but they won. Are we ready to pay the price?

Anonymous said...

Yawn@ abass please pick up a placard and stand outside government house stop trying to redirect traffic from this blog to your lonely planet@yahoomailmalamnomates.com.