Churches in Nigeria to stop marrying pregnant brides. | Welcome to Linda Ikeji's Blog

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Sunday, 22 January 2012

Churches in Nigeria to stop marrying pregnant brides.

Many Pentecostal and Catholic churches have long stopped marrying brides who are visibly pregnant; though some churches don't have anything against it and still marry pregnant brides.

Now I hear after much deliberation, soon no church in Nigeria will be allowed to marry any woman who is obviously pregnant. The woman will have to give birth first before any church is allowed to wed her. But thankfully for some brides, there are other options - court, traditional, garden weddings etc.

But what do you think of this? Are churches right in refusing to marry pregnant brides, and why do you think they care whether a bride is pregnant or not?

72 comments:

@adebsrk said...

Who cares...the marriages recognised by law are those in the Magistrate court. Church weddings are just for show.

bloglord said...

truthfully its wrong as it then means fornication/adultery is acceptable.
but theses days...everything has changed. everybody quotes d bible d way it favours dem.

Anonymous said...

The churches αяє indirectly pushing girls that ve willing partners to commit abortion b4 d wedding day. I know of a couple that ve fixed a date & found out dat d babe ¶§ pregnant, they had an abortion cos d pentecostal church requires pregnancy test b4 they marry u. Now 6 yrs later no issue & its now a problem in d marriage. So all this ¶§ rubbish.

ONYEDIKING said...

Who cares about them www.gideblog.com

Anonymous said...

The whole point of a church wedding is for God to recognise the two people as married. So why should anyone think it is good to get married with pregnancy when God doesn't like fornication etc. The church is right to not marry visibly pregnant women.

Anonymous said...

it is not even biblically in the place of the church to join them. The traditional marriage is the most important where both parents and families agree that their children be married and they pray and bless them not laying curses of better or worse, richer or poorer etc. ups and downs are a part of life but there was no where the bible commanded to bind ourselves by that in presence of a pastor.
The court wedding is important for the sake of the law of the land so you can be certified 'married'
The church wedding or white wedding as we like to call it, i believe is the traditional wedding ceremony of the 'oyinbos' so it is a choice if you want to do it their way or not.
However, you can always go to the church so that the church can pray for you and bless your marriage and this can be done anywhere both inside and outside the church premises.

Anonymous said...

In the catholic church, its done for the safety of the mother and the baby, cos some women stress themselves so much during wedding preparations and miscarry. I say dis cos ma cousin was asked to wait...she got married afta giving birth.

ai said...

I have an uncle who faked pregnancy test result for his wife because they had to get married in church. This was after they had contemplated abortion. She had their first baby in 7months and all the church members thought it was a premature birth.
Na by force to marry for church?
If church refuses to marry you because you commited a sin that God has forgiven, then please marry elsewhere

Anonymous said...

@Anonymous 12:33, The Church is not pushing no one to have abortion....Abi Church Wedding na by force? E ma gbami ke? For every organizations there are rules and regulations/principles as to which conduct is acceptable/unacceptable...If 'you' know beforehand the rules and 'you' still went ahead (probably mistakenly?) to get pregnant....who is to be blamed?

Anonymous said...

So this is what nig churches is doing now what abt d people who r having sex with kids in church what abt people using church money to live d high life d church has to look for something better to do

kkdlegend said...

biblically its wrong the wedding is for two not for 3, if u get my point,

Anonymous said...

Why would the woman carry belle in d first place...why can't they just wait a few months or use protection...marriage is no longer sacred with all these pregnant brides everywhere...so forget abortion matter..let dem just use protection biko

Anonymous said...

Its right for dem to reject.Fornication or sex before marriage is wrong n it leads to hell but because d devil controls d world now it is now a normal tin.May we nt enta hell becos of dis.Amen.I support deir action

Anonymous said...

nonsense, the bible doesn't say one should be a virgin bride. Jesus sef get plenty wives--- all dem nuns they are married to him innit.

Anonymous said...

Well, the churches r rite 4 refusin †☺ wed α pregnant bride coz its said 'sex AFTER marriage' so dt hs bin gone against dts Ɣ they won't wed α visibly pregnant bride.....

Anonymous said...

Super Story!. What abt th ones tht r 'visibly dating'. Espcly among th 'workers'. AMIHW mcheeeeeew.

sakara said...

ok o church wedding or pregnancy...choose 1 na?....pregnancy is more important than church formalty...why d do d churches request for court certificates before joining couples...which means chuch own na drama na to show off wedding dresses and trails...mscheew

Anonymous said...

These churches will rather marry a girl with children out of wedlock than marry a girl who is pregnant with a man she wants to spend the rest of her life with. Hiss

Anonymous said...

Are u only approving posts that does not oppose your (Linda's)view? #Just asking#

Anonymous said...

Jst tryin to promote sex b4 marriage, c notin wrong in that.

Anonymous said...

When you say churches which do you mean? Obviously the Catholic Church does not just wake up to make decisions like this. Every church preaches abstinence before wedding, but we all know that most couples would have 'explored' each others' bodies before marriage, including Deeper Life members. So I'd say wed them even with pregnancy!The most important thing is they love each other enough to take that step. And that's not to say I encourage fornication.

Anonymous said...

@anon2 2:08 don't be stupid.

Kemi said...

I feel it's not in the place of the church to judge..simple.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous jan 22 201e 06:33 AM, I think she is o! I put up a comment on another article sometime ago, it never saw d light of day and was never published. !!

Anonymous said...

Let us stop deceiving ourselves,it is wrong to engage in pre-marital sex no doubt. How many people are keeping the rules.my point is pregnant or not the church should join them as lon g as they desire a church wedding.

Anonymous said...

Well u can't make ur choice & ask for God's approval, u r either for God or against him, God is against fornication, so pls stop dis blasphemy, u can go ahead & get married anywhere but not God's house, eyin ashewo dede yii mscheeew

Anonymous said...

BASIC things are BASIC: Marriage is between UN-married baby-less individuals not otherwise

Shirley said...

I agree with this rule. It's so awkward seeing pregnant brides IN church. If your faith is strong enough to want to get married in a Church, then it is necessary to go by the rules. Marrying pregnant brides is against the rule of God not to engage in fornication. There are other ways to get married, it doesn't have to be in a church.

Anonymous said...

I wonder o,u pple avin sex b4 marriage n person wey carry belle b4 marriage,na d same fornicatn u dey commit,jst dt d person wey get belle tot it was wise 2 seal d deal probabli by gettn married.and moreso,wat abt all dis so called workers dt sleep wit one another,abi bcos d pastor didn't knw abt,mscheww

Anonymous said...

Sharap dere,we knw ur type.oya sepe dt u r a virgin,oloshi lk u.

Anonymous said...

I wonder o,u pple avin sex b4 marriage n person wey carry belle b4 marriage,na d same fornicatn u dey commit,jst dt d person wey get belle tot it was wise 2 seal d deal probabli by gettn married.and moreso,wat abt all dis so called workers dt sleep wit one another,abi bcos d pastor didn't knw abt,mscheww

Anonymous said...

LOL Nigerians are some of the biggest hypocrites I have ever experienced. This is hilarious.

The Great Oracle said...

My mum told me this before getting married- "I am not a young person. I cant go on fasting, praying long hours or going visiting one pastor, imam or native doctor over child bearing problem when God's permanent way of overcoming it is always readily available.

"If you have made up your mind to marry her, get her pregnant. All other issues after that are minor."

Anonymous said...

But even if they've been living together for years and have children sef, no problem abi?
What of if another girl is pregnant for the groom at the time of the wedding?
why is there no way to check on the virginity of the groom?
Bottom line, We humans have no right to judge when God doesn't judge us.

Anonymous said...

The church did not judge it is their rules. They do not allow one to be pregnant and come into the church and get married. Sex before marriage: wrong.

Anonymous said...

Hmm..

Anonymous said...

Abi ooo

Anonymous said...

I would prefer to have my wedding in a nice location with a pastor in hand to help bless our union. I don't want to be in a physical church.

Anonymous said...

So its not the place of the church to judge abi? What kind ofwaed sense of reasoning is that. The bible is clear on no premarital sex, yet you expect the church to join a pregnant woman in marriage? Dont be ridiculous. Its unfortunate that Nigerian women are now as loose and wayward as their westnern counterparts. However, dont expect God to change his rules just because you've lost your morals.

Anonymous said...

Dear anonymous @12.42pm,January 22nd, U said d church shouldn't marry "visibly pregnant" women. So is it all right to marry women who are not visibly pregnant? smh

Anonymous said...

church wedding is not by force na. If church says it cant marry u bcos u r preggo, find another place to marry na. This our world sef. Me think there shd be no religion for some pple since they dont want to follow d laws of God in these religions. Better still if u want religion, find one that suits u. The Christian God says dont fornicate, dont lie, dont steal, dont....... So? Take it or leave it. Chikena.

Anonymous said...

Linda better get your facts right b4 U publish rubbish! Catholic church still weds pregnant brides as my church Holy Trinity Catholic Church Maitama Abuja still wedded pregnant bride as at december last year . Pls don't say wat U don't know especially about churches and people's belief

Anonymous said...

I don't think it is anybody's biz, pregnancy is a gift from God. I pray that it will not lead to girls having abortions bcos they want to wed in a church.
Too much hypocracy

Anonymous said...

This is what happens when you give the church so much power. People are so ignorant, they don't even remember how powerful and corrupt the churches were in the Medieval times, before power was shifted to the government as the supreme law maker.

Anonymous said...

Anon 6:45am u are very right d catholic church doesn't just make decisions like that. As for churches decideing in unison not to marry pregnant women i think they are more pressing issues in this country that should be addressed.those people who are quoting bible and talking fornication, na una holy pass? Na who carry belle d fornicate abi? How many of u got married as virgins? Make una search una self before una begin judge o.
I know of a pastor whose fiancee committed abortion a month before d wedding cos the church wanted to carry out a pregnancy test,in this case i think d abortion(murder) is worse than the fornication(sex btw two people in love). I have said my bit

Anonymous said...

Anonymous 12:42, if the church doesn't want to marry pregnant brides they should NOT marry pregnant brides. Which one is visibly pregnant again? So you're less "guilty" because yours doesn't show? That's hypocritical and it implies that the church is more concerned with appearances than what they are saying is right. A pregnant woman who is yet to be married is not ideal but I don't understand how refusing to let her get married when she wants is the better option. After all if they wait until she has delivered I think it's safe to say they will have "fornicated" a hell of a lot more by the time the wedding day arrives. As usual Nigeria does not know how to curb the problem from the root. They should carry go jo.

ronke said...

i am catholic and i am pretty sure the catholic church will marry you even if u are pregnant

Anonymous said...

I love u,u make so much sense!truth is no one pregnant person comes into God's presence ignorant of her sin....so u c,wen a woman insists she must get married in d presence of God n His witnesses know dat she's alredy asked her fada 4 forgiveness!judgement will definitely start in d church cos we dnt preach forgiveness and a lot of d oda stuff dat God stands for!we preach things d way it affects us.....wrong!

Anonymous said...

I just feel that instead of turnin dem away....bring dem in,show dem love and tell dem y what dey've done is wrong but marry dem.....get to them first b4 d devil does or finishes what he started in dier lives.....Jesus neva turned any1 away,I dnt fink d church shld....just saying

Unknown said...

Marriage is a sacred sacrament between two people.. Not three (or four, as the case may be).

Anonymous said...

Linda!! Correction:

THE CATHOLIC CHURCH WILL WED A PREGNANT BRIDE...ASK AROUND!

Anonymous said...

And they wonder why abortions are on the rise...smh!!

Anonymous said...

@anonymous 2:08, U MUST BE AN ANTI-CHRIST! If u r not, then u need to b careful, don't be misguided...study the bible to find out who Jesus Christ is and why He came to this world.

babeontop said...

Oh yeah? How abt "invisibly" pregnant? Hypocrites...all of you.

Makeover by T.E.J.U said...

I attend a Pentecostal church,and my pastor doesnt condone it,he will say 2 shall become one,not 3,inshort,my pastor's wife will take you and your husband for pregnancy and Hiv test,even if its 3days before the wedding,if its positive!wedding is cancelled ni o,and if negative,the marriage committe wud approve that u can marry,so sisters in my church,are so careful,dose that av gottn preg,simply did traditional and faced d stigma till it dies...wat u sow u reap,some of us cannot be holding body,and some Holyforming sister will b forming lie and opening leg after,and yet still get glory,lailai,ur sin Shall find u out,wat u sow,u reap! Shikena

Anonymous said...

Excuse me,so not being married in the church means that God has not recognised you as married?

Anonymous said...

please they should get over themselves. its a stupid rule.

Anonymous said...

good

Anonymous said...

It is mere hyprocrisy. The churches will not wed a pregnant bride but the pastor can name the baby after birth. very interesting!

Anonymous said...

What! So U married her 4 children?
The concept of marriage is companionship n' not children oooo.
Therefore, if it is wrong in the sight of man, then it's wrong in God's sight.
If U want 2 have sex b4 marriage, itz ur choice.God has given us our will, use it wisely.
Finally, remember the laws are made 4 man, and not man 4 the laws.

Anonymous said...

Why do people like talking trash. Its not compulsory to have a church wedding. But if you must do, simply abide by the rules. The bible is strongly against adultery and fornication, hence the need for churches to stop marrying pregnant brides. If you are pregnant, simply wait till you put to birth and you are free to do your church wedding.

Shaddy said...

Most of you guys are getting it so wrong well, maybe some of you are not Christians for a chrisitian you are not even suppose to have sex before your wedding day....and is biblical that is the word of God and that is the best No wonder many ladies get dumped after the guys might have had sexual intercourse with them. I really appreciate whosoever that initiates this....Great!!!

Unknown said...

I don't see what people are so bitter about. If your church will not marry you because u are pregnant, then find another. After all, it is nobody's fault but yours. If you were so religious, u wouldn't have tasted the fruit before marriage. That said, it will not kill us(both men and women) to apply a little self discipline and save sex until after marriage. it is because we have all thrown self control to the wind that is why there is so much rape and incest going on in the society. Our men cannot keep it together even for a day! Disgusting!

Anonymous said...

Shut up na you make am

Anonymous said...

finally, a way to avoid church wedding. Waste of time and money.

Anonymous said...

church wedding is imported tradition from oyibo people, na demo jaré!

Joey said...

Whaoooooooo funny how we humans reason. I guess each individual is entitled to their own opinion as we all say. But dear commentators I say let us be wise and act right. Chikena!!!

Anonymous said...

Abi!

Anonymous said...

pleezz,who cares?wether u giv birth before,during or after marraige does not matter.u've sha eaten the forbidden apple so wot difference does it make?
wot matters is that both parties love each other n have decided(freewillfully) to get married.churches shud focus on better things n more important issues than pregnant brides...so they want to stop wedding pregnant brides?wot are they going to do about promiscious priests and pastors?castrate them???psheeeew

Anonymous said...

But its ok for them to get married AFTER the child is born? LOL that makes no sense! that's religion for show, as long as no one can tell, then its ok. You know not being pregnant is not a sign of virginity or fornication between 2 parties, hence it is not our place to judge but the lords because we are nothing but mere humans with the mind and judgement of a of a human being! No wonder why ppl get detoured from christianity, now thats a sin, leaning onto your own understanding... and that person that needs love and sees hate from a church will not see God shining through you because you are so worried about useless things and not focusing on what God has called you to do!

weddings said...

That's really unfair.its a stupid rule.

Unknown said...

But u don't lie??? Y won't churches also say pple dat lie should not come to church on Sunday... Wats d difference btw a liar and a fornicator

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