Should married women cut off their single friends? - Adejoro Olumofin asks | Welcome to Linda Ikeji's Blog

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Friday, 26 December 2014

Should married women cut off their single friends? - Adejoro Olumofin asks

Article written by flamboyant psychologist -  Adejoro Olumofin aka "Doktor" Mofin
Let's talk Volume 1. (Should married women cut off their single friends?). Psychometrics has shown that some married women cut off their single friends. This has ended long term friendships, even with siblings, caused envy, strained childhood relationships and created bitter rivalries.
Should married women have only married friends?  Some married women who have cut their friends off claim that :

(1) Their focus has changed and they no longer have similar interests or anything in common with their single friends
(2) They don't want to get tempted back into single ladies behavioural pattern or lifestyle such that they develop a level of respect for being married
(3) They don't want their single friends close to their husbands because of temptation on both sides as well as keeping boundaries of respect for their spouse..
(4) The believe that single ladies are jealous of them and could therefore be a threat to their marriage in one way or another
(5) Disapproval of certain friends from the spouse
(6) Some friends have always opposed and still oppose their marriage and are always looking to pick a fault in either the spouse or the marriage
(7) The feeling of superiority over single friends from the idea that there is somewhat a level attained above them
(8)Protection from talking to friends about their marriages and giving them the gun to use against them

Are these reasons valid and true?
This does not apply to all married women obviously but this is a very popular phenomenon in Nigeria..
There is no fixed solution or stand on this because what works for Mrs "A" may not work for Mrs "B", this is relative to individuals. Everyone knows what works for them, the type of friends they have and the type of husbands they have. Some friends may have Ill motives and some friends may not, some husbands may chase your friends some husbands may not.
Let's make sure what ever decision we make is based on best interest for the marriage to work and for all parties but always beneficial to us. 
Also make sure to put facts into consideration . I.e the history you have with some friends and your husbands personality. If you have any friend that has a history of snatching your boyfriends then you clearly don't want her near your husband. Same If you have friends who are always in competition with you or backbiting you etc
Don't cut your friends off because people are doing it. Rather establish there a balance between all relationships including family, friendship and marriage.
Read more articles on Adejoro Olumofins instagram page : @joroolumofin
Also contact him on : olumofinj@yahoo.com

141 comments:

Cute G said...

Should married men cut off their single friends? - Cute G asks.

D J STELCH said...

They could Cutt off some who would influence the marriage Wrongly..

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.Disclaimer:: Raise Your Words, Not Your Voice. It Is Rain That Grows Flowers, Not Thunder..

OBINNA JAMES said...

Its natural, once anybody gets married he or she will always cut off some friends in order to concentrate in his or her marriage.

LAURAAUJ KAHI said...

100percent true

Nnenne George said...

No women shouldn't cut off Becos they're married...friendship has nothing to do with marital status...just like men can't stop womanizing even when they're married..

yusuf olowo said...

NO, stigma evrywhere

Henry Eze said...

Rubbish ....this psychopath is seeking for the attention so bad......psychologist my ass....stop showing us ur pixs and go get a job

Henry Eze said...

Rubbish ....this psychopath is seeking for the attention so bad......psychologist my ass....stop showing us ur pixs and go get a job

eka said...

nope..dont think so. Just keep marital issues off your discussions with them.

IBK said...

Am of the opinion that a married woman should av less of single friends esp of the male gender, female single friends can stil be kept, however, a married woman should know the type of her single friends worth keeping esp for her marrital security. Male friends are no go area except they are married and the husband knows them well. Having married female friends can help understand and overcome some marrital issues that might come up than singlfriends. My thoughts tho.

chimmy onyewuchi said...

True talk, I agree with him.

carlos iyke said...

They shouldn't. Depends on what they gain from the friendship.
$.
$.
@Mr Endowed via Lumia phone

Debbie Chelsea said...

kool

Iyke Obi said...

Ood conclusion. Personally, I'd adcvice my wife 2 stay away any friend that be a bad influence in her life.

carlos iyke said...

If you just leave ur friend cos you are now married, ur friend would feel ALONE, which might have some physiological effect
$.
$.
@Mr Endowed via Lumia phone

Bonita Bislam said...

Before,i used to distance myself from my married friends for fear of problems.But the one i met here changed my perception.She's super cool,a married friend with a difference.I agree with this flamboyant psychologist intoto.

lilyswt okafor said...

Cutting dem off doesn't really matter. It depends on type of frnds u move arnd wit.

Kingsley Bassey said...

To me I don't think keeping a single friends should be an issue, some single's re good while some re bad, because we all know's that there is a word which goes, show me Ur friend and i'll tell u whu u re.#THAT AKWA IBOM BOY#

christie benjamin said...

Not necessary....friends are friends forever...that's why we have BFF.
¤
¤¤¤GUTS OVER FEAR¤¤¤
¤
¤¤¤QUEENMAYA¤¤¤

Bolateetoh said...

The real truth is some single ladies don't like hanging out with their married friendz bcoz they wouldn't want to be too 9c to d extent dat their friend's husband will start havin second thought on his marriage or too razz for d husband to put d wife in a situation of 'choose between me n ur friendz'

Anuoluwapo said...

Pls read/share my post on this http://anuoluwapoo.blogspot.com/2014/07/married-woman-syndrome.html?m=1 Thanks

kate Isangha said...

No.... Although wen ur married u ve to cut down some excesses and tink lyk a married person ....but U still need ur single frenz around 4 so many reasons

PLAYBOX.NG said...

Birds of the same feather flock together!!

Zoë said...

I don't think they should, except the single friend have this character that will jeopardise her relationship.

Vicky Darl said...

Don't think so ,not necessary staying away from ur old friends.

Dammy Grace said...

no sir

Lovely mee said...

I believe it depend on their kind of friends, there are some friends you just can't leave even if you're married

igwe Adaobi said...

I support u 100%

Sandra Diamond said...

I get u doc Mofin, but these days mmmmmm...anyways I didn't want to cut my friend off until one day when my hubby went to tickle her but I saw them and he apologised that he meant no harm to my friend. I only told my friend to come to my house whenever I invited her and not unannounced, it's not my friend's fault but I just have to be careful u know. so ladies and women, cutting ur friends off depends on u. I'm a very liberal person...I no like wahala kia kia.

ary said...

Yes, like he says, what works for Peter, might not work for Paul, the trick is finding the correct fit.

Anonymous said...

This is very shallow for married women to do this. How can you cut off your friend, just because you are married. What happens when you divorce ?

Anonymous said...

Doktormofin nice article.

Anonymous said...

Preach

Anonymous said...

This is my favourite of all articles of Doktormofin.

Anonymous said...

Olumofin Adejoro hot psychologists.

kayPee said...

Cutting away from your single friends doesn't make sense at all...

viber man said...

Fuck single ladies. I want married ones

Anonymous said...

I will say it makes sense for married women to cut off single friends, for reasons best known to the married women.

Anonymous said...

Single or Married. Find loyal friends not home wreckers.

Anonymous said...

Apt.

Anonymous said...

Sensible write up.

BelieveAll said...

it would be the best is married women will abstain from single ladies


GET THE WORDS YOU NEED TO SUCCEED THIS COMING YEAR

Anonymous said...

Fresh

Anonymous said...

My crush...

Anonymous said...

Psychologist/ Model.. Can't hate another man's hustle. Nice packaging bros, all na settings.

Osquare101@gmail.com

Amaka Faith said...

Well i think once a woman is married her sole aim should be protecting her home front freinds and other things should take a back sit

Her Excellency said...

As for me, I still keep most of my frnds n most r single. I kn hw to balance btw husby n frnds so derz no friction

lucky chukz said...

I naturally don't like my girls having female friends very close. Same will go for marriage. My wife won't keep close relationship with any woman (not just single ladies).

Richard Afon Yinkå Ray said...

Hmmm. (mute)

RUM MUR said...

The married women who do that were either bad (wild) as singles and had bad friends as well or they don't have good and useful single friends. Some friends, whether married or single, are invaluable. If you are married and have such, you sure won't discard her.

Shirley Shalokpe said...

Most people feel that way but respecting everyone's feelings and putting facts into consideration should be a better way to decide

Richard Afon Yinkå Ray said...

Hmmm. (mute)

ukwumaka theophilus said...

He made sense. Very common with the ladies.

Anonymous said...

Should single women keep troublesome married friends once they become a pain in the ass after saying I do?

Ejike Gideon said...

i dont want to read your shit but if i mistakenly find you near my wife or any of my family members wife just count yourself a dead man.I will blow your skull.

Dahenriez said...

Well,i dnt think they should.

Tilly said...

Am not married and any single friend dt cuts me off cos she got married isnt really my friend.
And the truth is when d whole euphoria of being married blows over, dey will come back. Marriage is a blessing not a thing of status. How pple handle it depends on their individuality.

Hauwa A. Okpanachi said...

Hes good.

gracie offor said...

It happens naturally that wen u get married ur single friends don't come that close to u like bfore

Harsh Truth said...

Should married men cut of their? if that be the case.

DacDuchess said...

I have never cut off my single friends..agreed, interests and focus have changed but, I relate with dem on a different level. Like adejoro said, a balance can be created. It's very possible to be married and still have ur single friends

Jules Louis said...

I still have single friends but i set limits. Though the reasons r true for some marriages some women learnt d hard way. And who says keeping married friends solves the problem? Some married women still fuck their friend's husbands. Why is he looking sideways in all his pictures?

Osarhiemen Agbonkonkon said...

I like the conclusion..."...put your facts into consideration...."
Btw,he's goodlooking.

Anonymous said...

Thank you! I ain't cutting nobody off! Bless

Baby cakes said...

Okay! I am hurt now. Is this guy really a bastard? Whats with all the pictures of himself? How desperately vain and self indulging can one be? Get over yourself Mr-no-other-profession-i-must-die-with-psychology! Tsk!

Maye73 said...

True talk

Anonymous said...

Mr Dapper..,wa GBA yi

Mystique said...

Well, true but sad, not all single friends should be cut off but definitely some friends needs to be cut off. As a married woman I believe that having strings of friends is not advisable in your best interest. Too many friends will be a distraction to your home. Have a few quality friends both singles and married. Just be viigilant.

Anonymous said...

LOL..

Anonymous said...

Mr Olumofin pls reply your email Sir..

Anonymous said...

Words of wisdom brotherly.. Ride on

Anonymous said...

This is so True! Naija women act like marriage is the end of the world.. Smhhhh

Anonymous said...

True!!

Anonymous said...

I disagree Mr Olumofin

Anonymous said...

Proud of you.. Keep them Coming

Anonymous said...

Man Crush.. Hehe

Anonymous said...

MCE

Anonymous said...

Linda, this guy must really be paying you o. At least he listened and changed his attitude and tone in his write-ups, especially towards women.

Anonymous said...

Pls write more about guys.. Thank you

Ladi Okeowo said...

Lmaoooo! This guy like wahala sha

Bole Maureen said...

I wish I could call out names.. This is true abeg

Anonymous said...

Great Job

Anonymous said...

He's fine sha.. Is he straight?

Anonymous said...

Wise words.. One sided though

Anonymous said...

Mr man.. My friends haven't cut me off yet o.. Thank you

Anonymous said...

Nice Writeup

Anonymous said...

Brains and Looks.. I'm getting you.. Vain shaaa

Anonymous said...

Loooll

Anonymous said...

Great!

Anonymous said...

Niceeee

Anonymous said...

Hmmmm.. This Nigeria sha

Anonymous said...

Number 3 and 4 reason.. Gbammmm

Anonymous said...

Preachhhhhh

Anonymous said...

This is dead.. I didn't and won't cut my friends off

Anonymous said...

Practice what you preach

Anonymous said...

Please tell me how married women and single ladies have anything in common?

Anonymous said...

Adejoro my Instagram Crush.. He slays for life

Anonymous said...

Linda I see you have a new friend.. Hmmmm

Anonymous said...

This is war.. Ghennn ghaunnnn

Anonymous said...

How is this my business bros?

Anonymous said...

Woman wrapper

Anonymous said...

Superficial!! Smhhh

Anonymous said...

This guys pot belly article was tacky and narrow minded.. But this is sensible.. My friend started acting somehow after her marriage..

Anonymous said...

Thank you for this..

Anonymous said...

Awon Goons mi

Anonymous said...

Doro Super Mofin.. Lmaoooooo

Anonymous said...

Lmaooo

Anonymous said...

This guy just wants to fuck

Anonymous said...

LOL.. Mr Everywhere all over the media

Anonymous said...

Mr Ondo

Anonymous said...

I disagree!!!!! Facts pls

Anonymous said...

Please another controversial article.. Yaminggggg

Anonymous said...

I'm happy we have a man speaking for this ladies.. Bless you

Anonymous said...

Your website sir?

Anonymous said...

Good Job

Anonymous said...

Loooll.. Mr Flamboyant. We know ya fine, less pictures

Anonymous said...

Do you have a publicist Sir??

Amaka said...

Rightly stated

Anonymous said...

Omo Politician... Eku le de

Anonymous said...

I'm happy for you Joro..

Anonymous said...

Hahahahahah.. Women be so sensitive

Anonymous said...

Nicely done.. Joro Mr loud.. Lmaooooo

Anonymous said...

This guy won't stay in one place.. Bella Naija, everywhere.. Mr Dappernesss

Anonymous said...

More Articles plssssss

Tobi Adefunwa said...

Congratulations Bro.. Bless

Tobi Adefunwa said...

Keep Going!!!

Tobi Adefunwa said...

Mr Pot Belly.. Shallow Shallow

Anonymous said...

Smh

Anonymous said...

Lmaoooooo.. This guy shaaa

Anonymous said...

I saw this guy and his brother at MMR.. Fashion kings

Anonymous said...

Spartans!!!!!! Mad men

Anonymous said...

Great Job

Anonymous said...

Fools talk..

Cute G said...

Loolz

Zizi said...

Some singles are not good at all, they want to know everything about u n ur family. Married women should mind their homes, singles look for ur own simple

Chikaodili Ndife said...

It should be like that, you only cut off those that bring negative energy and minus that just keep ur friends

ebonyz... said...

It depends on how her single friends influence her, if it negative, then yes she should cut off

ebonyz... said...

It depends on how her single friends influence her, if it negative, then yes she should cut off

Anonymous said...

A single friend cut me off.

Kelvin Jackson said...

Nigerian things...

Anonymous said...

Keep ur frds but stop flirting with the opposite sex or revealing too much of ur union

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