Dear LIB readers: Should I go back to my matrimonial home?
From a LIB reader
This is a true story and I need your urgent advise. I left my matrimonial home in January after I found out another woman was pregnant for my husband. I was six months pregnant then and the other lady was five. This woman is my husband's ex who he kept sleeping with until our wedding in September 2012. He told me he hasn't touched her since we got married but he got her pregnant a month before our wedding. I'm eight months pregnant now and I'm very angry and disappointed in myself for choosing a man who has humiliated so much. My family and friends are begging me to go back home, give my marriage a chance and have my baby there, but I don't know that I want to do that. I'm staying at my parents house at the moment and yes my husband is also begging. So on top of being angry, I'm also confused.
Sweetheart,go back home and stay stand by your man. He was wrong but that is your home. For him to have chose you over the other lady shd mean a lot to you. She is d one who shd be seeking for advise,not you. All the best.
Madam plz go back nd work on ur marriage, I understand ur pain but u shuld forgive him nd let peace reign. D success of any marriage depends on a woman. I wish u safe delivery.
He hasn't touched her cos she's pregnant.He's a dog but let's face it.u knew u were marrying a cheat,u knew she was lurking around somewhere but u were too despErate to marry. My advice is for you to go back&have your child there while hoping he stays faithful to you.If you don't have ur child there,the other woman will&they'll live happily ever after
i will advice u go back to ur matrimonial home and have ur baby and take ur rightful place before someone else does. for ur husband u have to pray to God to touch his life. the ball is in ur court.Anger will not help[ the situation so my dear go to God in prayers and he will see u thru.
My dear I know u re deeply hurt but pls let it go, habouring such pain is not healthy for n ur baby pls let it go. I pray God will heal ur heart. And pls go back to ur hubby d mistake is done don't let d devil win. I don't know u but pls forgive him, reach into ur heart n remember y u married him.
U are foolish. How is the other woman a 'kill joy'? Didn't u read dat d idiotic husband slept with her till his wedding? this woman's husband is her 'kill joy', not the other woman. Olodo
I am not married but from the experiences I have seen.... Ma pls go back to your husband.give peace a chance and ask God to heal your marriage. As for the child, I mean the other child, both of u shld come to an agreement as regards to the child, in fact family and u shld see the other lady, so if she is presently planning a wedding in her head, she can like to erase the dream ASAP. But go back first and start loving ur husband again.
No man is perfect expect our Lord Jesus Christ, go back and make it work, forgive him,love him and shelter him. Mostly forget without forgetting u wont make it work. Go home and pray. Please dont make your child be in the touture of growing up in a single home
since the schmuck (forgive me for calling him that, but he is) is begging you to go back, just go. The truth is that he has a wandering third leg. And sweet heart, hope you are not a full time house wife, pls find something and do. God will help us.
Pls my lady go back. don't do what u will regret in d future. He married u and not her,he choose u over her even if she is pregnant for him. u said d vows pls pick ur broken pieces and move on to make ur home. the bible said that a wise woman builds her home but a foolish one destroys it. no matter what pls be strong.
Yes he slept with her a month to your wedding! We understand how heart wrenching that must be for you. Hmmmmm. Can you forgive him? Yes. Does he deserve a second chance? YES. Will he hurt me again? Probably still Yes! Can I stand the hurt and pain? YES. Dear Sister,I want you to take note of 3 very important issues on ground. Firstly,he married YOU and not her. Secondly,from your letter,he has expressed remorse over his actions and still loves you. Hence his "begging". Thirdly, your baby needs to take his/her rightful place in his/her Father's house. Taking these into consideration,your marriage deserves a second chance. So forgive your man and go back home.
If u take him back. She will still always be there as she has been before u even got married
I advise that if u do take him back move to another state........for real The further away u are The less opportunities he has to be with her Move away
its a pity such unfaithful man....i feel ur pain dear, dont give up now, you have gone far...u have a victory to be won since he has come begging .. give him the second chance.its ur home go back and be praying for ur hubby he needs a touch from God....am so sorry this kind of man is not meant to dwell with human being is to put him in the zoo and be feeding him 2geda with monkey that is were he belong.
Please go back to your home... you may think you are hurt now but i tell u, hurt can not describe how u will feel if the other woman moves in with ur husband.
my dear pls dnt go back oo,he will impregnant another girl.just give me his phone number and house address let me send one of my unmarried friends there to tell him what he did is not right. you are def a learner.pls u pple should ignore dis one jor they vex there
Your husband is only responsible for the child she's carrying and nothing like love or unnecesary closeness between him amd d woman etc.. Just make sure u state your rules..
My sis pls go back home to your husband if you genuniely love him. It doesn't mean you stupid or that you can't do better for yourself. All you need to do, is to be more prayer and rebuild ur home. My prayer for your husband ex unborn child, is for the baby not to be the one to suffer for the sins the mother has committed.
I just read Annie Macaulay Idibia's interview in TW magazine...is some parts i felt she sounded still bitter and angry and in some parts she's happy if you ask me. The bottom line is she would never trust 2face again 100% even if she loves him with all her heart. Annie has to deal with 5 kids from 2 women my dear how do you compare that?
I feel like helping you kill the bastard, my dear i know how you feel well not as someone who has gone through the same thing but as a woman myself i can imagine. My boss did the same thing he had a girl with his ex (who is now 11) a month to his wedding he slept with the same woman and had a second child, his wife was crushed but married him still but am sure doesn't trust him 100%. The stories abound my dear, just be still cut out all the external voices and listen to what your inner voice tells you.If you pray its time to do so with allll your might. Its easy for all the 223 people who have commented before me to say GO BACK HOME but if they were in your shoes it would be HARD. My dear your answer is inside you, complete strangers can't help you make up your mind if you feel a second chance is what you want, by all means if not have your baby and move on.
see this chick o...u re still asking if u shuld go bak? My dear, if Annie Maculay could accept 2-face back even after he impregnated several women who had loads of kids for him...Then i dont see any reason why you shouldnt go back to your matrimonial home.
Its called SHIT and it happens a lot. Get ur self together and GO BACK to ya man...OSISO !!!
DO WHAT IS BEST FOR YOUR UNBORN CHILD.DEED HAS BEEN DONE,ITS FORGIVEABLE BUT NOT FORGETABLE.GO BACK TO YOUR HOME AND HELP YOUR HUSBAND TIDY UP THE MESS DATS Y U R HIS WIFE. LINDA POST MY COMMENT O.MAMA AFRICA
going back shudnt b ur priority for now bt having a safe delivery . Look for a Gud place to stay n ve ur baby safely after dat u can tink of going bak. Cos d ex mite decided to go diabolical so u wnt survive child birth so she can cm in pls b wise n careful.
HMMMM men! they are a case to study, i acrually see myself in a similar situation but mine is not the pregnancy stuff, i think they are just a necessary devil, you just have to pray and fight back to be the number one, as for him not cheating else where? i doubt it! men of this days think cheating is normal, some men even think when they dont cheat they get bore, no true love again, i will advice you to go back home and pray to God to give you the stregnth to carry on, your child will always be the real child of the house be it girl or boy, so just be calm somethings are just meant to be, i will advice you to pray to God to lead you on how to cope with him, cus my dear, its HARDDDDDDDDDDDDD! but good luck and go back home! whew! #omosexy
You are not serious to have done that, or do you want to give way for someone to come in? Please put yourself together and rush back home and try to make your husband tired of sex so he won't have time to look out.
please go back to ur husbands housem God Almighty wil help u tru. and dont forget to always pray for him. it is well wit ur home. Linda pls post my comment or is there a reqmnt one must av before u post ones comment?
Left with me, I think she should stay away for a while and see what happens cos the way i see it, he'll continue even after you forgive him and go back. how could he get his ex pregnant just 1 month to his wedding.
you made ur bed darling leave with it.dont ever go into marriage thinking a man will change. he probably married you cos u tolerate infidlity. u knew abot d other woman and did nothing thinking saying i do at d altar will change anything. Anne is happy with tuface look at the brighter side of things u get to be d one with d ring on her finger and other r outside. never for one moment think that he will change cos there is something definitly taking him to the other lady and it will continue so dont be deceived. Be objective and share ur man. Goodluck LADIES STOP HUSSELING MEN UNA NO GO HEAR
Goodday, sorry for the disappointment from your husband. This is my first comment on linda's blog just bcos I love u. Please, go back home. If u are a christian, pray to God and seek guidance from the holy spirit. Did u hear from God concerning ur marriage. If no, please see ur pastor and he will tell u wot 2 do. May God bless you and your family.
Look- people that are steering you to go back arent looking out for you. He cheated and he's probably still screwing her. Number 1: do you truly love him? If you do, don't go back right away. Teach him a lesson and make him suffer. If he's an option, go back now, use him and leave his ass once you're back on your feet.
Seems like you snatched the guy from the chic that's why he continued to see her until you guys got married. He still has a thing for his ex! She probably was at your wedding! You are confused because you are not a sincere person. u would have told us how u ended up with a man who is clearly still in love with his supposed to be ex........ Both of you ladies are a month apart. you said she was 5 months gone when you were six months gone. I feel you took in for him to cement your hold on the guy when he clearly did not love you as his heart still somehow belonged to this other woman you call his ex. My dear, i know society demands that you go back to continue with your marital vows... but if you know that.. 1. you will forever be unhappy.... let the courts annul the wedding. 2. Believe me, even though he will never hit you or be unkind to you, the fact that you are aware another woman has a child the same age as yours will continue to eat you up till you die. 3. The fact he isn't abusive, you will be unhappy in that union because you are aware of the times he will have to see his child or hang out .... you know to try to be a good dad to his other child. If you know you can live with this knowledge and still be happy in your home..... then you can go back.... the deed has already been done .. no need crying over spilled milk right? but if you know you can not come to terms with the knowledge that he lied to you during and after you courtship and wedding, he was cheating on you without a condom thereby putting your health at risk(all dem yamayama stds), you will never love him pre knowing about the other belle, TRUST the main catalyst for a successful relationship has been broken..... you know how e take be you for mind cos you r wearing the tight shoes.... Be a single mum and move on or stay. You can always find happiness again with someone else or still with him.... but as humans we r no matter how you try to tell yourself he is forgiven, there will always be that thing called doubt and you will always be unhappy as long as u r in that house with that particular man! Do the maths.... your happiness and sanity or emotional breakdown which is very difficult to overcome.....
Pls o libers,putting dis woman's case aside awhile. If u keep saying for better for worse,are u insinuating that a woman who is living wit a drunk,smoker n who is being abused verbally,emotionally,mentally constantly to the extent that she's fast depreciating,loosing her self esteem and bcoming suicidal bcos of the heat of the whole mess should remain wit such man despite no child has sealed up such marriage yet. Its my very own real story and I'l b grateful to have responses too.THANK YoU
Everyone is saying 'go back', Go back to what exactly?The next thing he will tell you is that he has decided to make her his second wife to 'keep the peace'! You will live in so much sorrow and bitterness if you go back, and i am not saying that you will not get over it but it will take a lot a courage and Grace, rising and falling. Go back to what exactly? The fact that the ex girlfriend now has the pleasure of watching you suffer cos she knows she has a right to your husbands attention because of the child they have together? Go back to what exactly? The fact that African society has made gullible women believe that a marriage of pain is better than none at all, or that the next man you meet will be a monster and this is as good as it gets, so you should endure humiliation instead? Go back to what exactly? Because The society will deem you a weakling if you allow another woman to 'wreck your home'so you should stay and clean up the mess? If you go back, let it be a divinely guided decision, but i assure you it will be not be easy, your healing will take years. And If you are ready for the long, painful but rewarding of forgiveness, and the shenanigans that come with it. take a step in that direction, otherwise walking away is easier for you,perhaps even better.....
Hello Dear, Disappointments pains, anger do come in relationships including MARRIAGE, the difference is how you handle them when it occurs. Work on your emotion/feeling, step down on your anger, let the love you feel take the greater part of you in all situations (except if there was/is no love). Act for and in Love in all situation. Agree you will make you marriage work. Forgive him (especially because he is sorry) and move right back into your HOME. Remember the ex is hanging around and praying you never come back so that it becomes easier for her to move in and take over completely. A loser is he/she who runs from problems, face it! resolve it! and be happy you did! Remember its your love, your man, your marriage, your home, your future, your happiness... grab and dust it clean and hold for keeps. My prayers are with you dear.
dear, it hurts i know but would you want to get stay with a cheating bastard all your life? baby leave this man and start afresh for him to have gone baq to this lady means you cant satisfy him and he has picked the lady over you, if u go back he will stay with u but visit the lady often cause of his child what do u think caused 2face to have so many children? when they go baq the ladies lure them baq into bed and remember she knows him better than u do.
A cheater will always be a cheater. I understand what you are going through. If you are not desperate for marriage, then I suggest you don't go back. If he is capable of doing this, then he might as well give you STD in future after you have forgiven him. On the other hand if you leave him, he will be miserable for the rest of his life, even if there is another woman in his life as I believe he married you for a reason. However you will also be miserable for a while if you leave him but will be fine afterwards. I value trust so much in a spouse and if something like this happends, it feels like a glas that has been broken. Although you can glue it together but it will never be the same again. This is not right. Its about time we africans take certain things serious especially women. If it were a woman who did this, it would have been an abomination. Why is it okay for men to do this and be forgiven. Very soon this will become a trend. I rest my case and good luck with your decision.
it is easy for everyone to say go back because they are not in your shoes. my dear stay with your parents give birth heal first and then decided for yourself what you want to do. at the end of the day you will have to live with the consequences of what ever decision you make. in my opinion if hes done it once he will most likely do it again.
pray about this before listening to anyone about what you should do
WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU PEOPLE BLAMING THE GUY? WHAT OF THE OTHER STUPID BITCH THAT SLEPT WITH HIM AND GOT PREGNANT?
MY SISTER PLEASE GO BACK TO YOUR HOUSE. WE ALL MAKE MISTAKES AND TRUST ME A MILLION AND ONE GIRLS GO THROUGH THIS EVERYDAY. GET OVER IT AND MOVE ON. KEEP YOURSELF BUSY AND PRAY.
ALL MEN ARE ALL THE SAME. DO NOT MOVE FROM FRYPAN TO FIRE. AS LONG AS HE LOVES YOU AND YOU KNOW IT MAKE IT WORK!
how come you are a month preggo ahead of his ex. if he truly stopped sleeping with her b4 u got married. then its one o 3thingz 1. hes not the father of her baby 2. guess you were preg b4 marriage 3. linda dis story z twisted or fabricated. if u like dont post the comment
Go back home to your husband. It is possible he is being blackmailed by that woman and that the child odes not belong to him! Have your baby in peace but make it clear to your husband that a paternity test must be done once that child is 6 months so that it can be esatblished once and for all that the child belongs to him. Besides, if he has agreed to change his ways, it will be foolish for you to stay away because the interloper will see it as an opportunity to move into your matrimonial home. It's alright to be angry at his betrayal but be wise and do the right thing...
Go back home. At least you aid it was before you guys got married, so this is hoping that it has never happened while you are married. He made a mistake, forgive and accept the change now. Ask God for wisdom on how to deal with the hurts and ache and try not to use your anger to push finally outside. Love conquers all my dear.
See this "small" girl, you think matrimonial homes is like they act it in movies and romance novels.
Ok now, stay in your parent's house now....continue staying there. Shebi your husband is still begging, let's see how long he will be humble enough before the "manly" arrogance get him.
Get KPMG or some of these churches to give you the statistics of the number of overdue single ladies out there, then you go know how far.
Wellll..... Cant say go or don't go because it has two sides, so certain elements of wisdom has to come to play and practice.My dad did same and there has been times of why did I and I am glad I did. So I reckon, you pray hard for direction especially because you are the only one in that shoe that bites. Condemnation of men or actions isn't the solution right now and one has to be careful not to be found judging! you just never know when your shoe would pinch ....
Almost everyone here is advising this lady to move back to her matrimonial home. Sadly, i agree with everyone though, but i think men need to begin to be disclipined enough to remain faithful to their wives because women are now beginning to go to any extent, to ensure that men pay for their infidelity. Men BE WARNED.
It seems (10:32) like you're the only 1 making sense.. Why put yourself and child through all the misery. Pray that God will see you through. You should leave with dignity and God spare ur health...
These comments....smh. See the common Nigerian mentality. Damn! I guess i was just raised differently
How can you people he encouraging her to stay in a marriage where her husband clearly doesn't respect their union. I'm sure if the takes were turned, you lot would be encouraging the husband to send his wife packing. Nigerian mentally & marriage its the worst!! Sue me!!
Its until he brings her a bag of AIDS that all of you will change tone? I'm sure that's not the only woman he is cheating with.
Stories like this make me think about all the shit people say to Genevieve Nnaji, Rita Dominic, etc. Always telling them to get married, yet stories like this surface on the daily. I'm sure Genevieve and Rita are genuinely happy being single, instead of having to deal with BS like this story above So think very clearly the next time you insult our actresses for being not married and/or bitter and frustrated like many of you married women on this blog.
GO BACK HOME!!!!! DO NOT LEAVE YOUR MATRIMONIAL HOME FOR A SCUM TO INVADE YOUR PLACE. THAT IS YOUR THRONE, AND SHE IS JUST A SIDE PIECE!!! GO BACK HOME AND HAVE A GOOD TALK WITH YOUR HUSBAND, MEN DO THESE THINGS, WHICH DOESNT MAKE IT ACCEPTABLE BUT SHOULD MAKE YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD STRONGER.....NOTHING IT IMPOSSIBLE HE CAN CHANGE!
a man who has the guts to cheat and does it without protection is the most callous of all men. it means he can never think straight and is myopic in his decision making.
ANON 2.34...IN MY HONEST OPINION, I WILL ADVICE THAT YOU LEAVE THAT MARRIAGE OF YOURS. IT MIGHT BE DIFFICULT TO DO BUT ALWAYS KNOW THAT MARRIAGE IS SUPPOSED TO BUILD YOU UP NOT TEAR YOU DOWN. FROM YOUR POST, YOU CANT THINK OF ANYTHING POSITIVE FROM YOUR MARRIAGE. MARRIAGE IS NOT A DO OR DIE AFFAIR. GET CLOSER TO GOD SO THAT HE WILL SEND YOUR SOUL MATE YOUR WAY.
AS FOR THE ORIGINAL POSTER, YOUR SITUATION IS VERY SAD AND MAY GOD HEAL YOUR PAIN. DRAW CLOSER TO GOD AND ENSURE THAT WHATEVER DECISION YOU MAKE IS FOR YOUR OWN GOOD AND HAPPINESS AND THAT OF YOUR BABY. WHETHER YOU DECIDE TO STAY WITH HIM OR TO STAY ON YOUR OWN, FORGIVE HIM FOR YOUR OWN PEACE OF MIND. EVEN IF YOU DECIDE TO DIVORCE YOUR HUSBAND OR NOT TO, FORGIVING HIM IS ONE OF THE MAIN REASONS THAT WOULD HELP YOU MOVE FORWARD.
ON ANOTHER NOTE, IT AMAZES ME HOW SOME NIGERIANS WILL FIND ALL SORTS OF REASONS TO EXCUSE AND FORGIVE A CHEATING MAN BUT WHEN A WOMAN DOES THE SAME EXACT THING, ALL HELL BREAKS LOOSE. WOMEN WILL BASH THE OFFENDING LADY LIKE THERE IS NO TOMORROW BECAUSE THE LADY'S ACTIONS REMINDS THEM OF THEMSELVES OR WHAT THEY ARE CAPABLE OF DOING (I.E SLEEPING AROUND) AND MEN WILL CALL HER ALL SORTS OF NAME TO MAKE THEMSELVES FEEL BETTER ABOUT THEIR CHEATING WAYS. BEFORE YOU CALL A CHEATING WOMAN NAMES, ALWAYS REMEMBER THAT MOST OF THE MEN THAT CHEAT SLEEP WITH WOMEN, SO, IF YOU CAN EXCUSE THE MAN OF HIS ACTIONS YOU SHOULD ALSO FIND A REASON OR MORE TO EXCUSE THE ACTIONS OF THE WOMAN HE SLEPT WITH. WHEN LINDA POSTED A PICTURE OF COCO, ICE T'S WIFE ON HERE WITH A MAN GRABBING HER BUTT, NOBODY SAID IN HER DEFENSE THAT SHE IS ONLY BUT HUMAN AND LIABLE TO MAKE MISTAKES. BUT A MAN IMPREGNATES HIS EX AND HIS WIFE AT ABOUT THE SAME TIME, AND PEOPLE STARTS RECALLING THAT NO ONE IS PERFECT. WHAT A PITY.
I DO NOT AND WILL NEVER SUPPORT CHEATING BUT I TRY TO BE OBJECTIVE IN MY REASONING.
please go back and meet your hubby , its bond to happen but you have to be strong forgive your husband and live happy with him for the sake of your baby.
Correct !!!!!!! All of u sayin go back , matrimonial home. if its d wife dt cheated e go b different story. all u girls sayin go back. u don settle for second class. Sorry o!!!!! If na American woman. she no need to ask!!!!mschewwww. tell d guy to disappear!
You have to go back, and pray to God to have mercy on you and your family. The bible says When the foundation is faulty what can the righteous do? Forgive and keep praying for him and also tell God to give you the grace to love him again cos its not easy.It is well with you and your family.
Na wa o!!! in ds country it seems like husbands can get away wit absolutely anything .. women must alw b d endurer. such a pity.. ...I'm better than an endurer.
Once a cheat, always a cheat. set standards for yourself and you will not be sleeping alone forever even if you leave this man forever. Nothing to say, this marriage is not doomed to end. He never left his ex and ex never left him. Very soon they will discover why they are good for each other and your husband will start acting out. Use your values, standards and wisdom to make your decision; you will never regret it.
Marriage is for better or worse....u had berra go back to ur man else d other woman will take care of him for you.... u shouldn't have even left in the first place,it only shows that u are weak!
Marriage is for better or worse....u had berra go back to your man or d other woman will help u take care of him... u shouldn't have even left in the first place,,it only shows how weak u are!
My dear life is a double edge sword.Marriage is for better n for worst,so u gat to deal wt it. running away will nt solve the issue rarher u got it worsen.take the challenge.
and if the reverse was the case you know the man will never take you back. I am not saying you should leave your husband, do what makes you. Unfortunately woman are treated like garbage in Africa.
Almost everybody on this blog has said go back to hubby. But the reasons are very diverse and confusing. A. Bc she's having a baby, so that the child will be trained. B. Men are cheat, she shld suck up wt it. C. The other lady will move in.
My reply A. A child trained by a single parent who is loved is definitely better and rounded than one who grows up in a bitter and loveless family. B. Not all men cheat, pls let's accord whatever percentage that don't the respect they deserve. C. She can move for all u care, just so u have ur peace of mind.
My thots on d matter 1. The dangers of a cheating husband or wife is not just the offsprings, but HIV and STDs esp the recent resistant-strain of gonorrhea.
2. Is he really contrite? But then how wld u know, humans can manage all forms of deceit.
3. Wld it continue like this? Nobody knows!
Way forward 1. Since this has been made a public issue, the fact the family members are now involved makes it that, let's make it private again. Reason is that one day he will come to respect you for guarding ur family resolution and terms.
2. U and ur hubby will go 4 HIV and STD test again, and if possible repeat the test after 6months. Ur ante-natal has covered u and I'm sure u must have been tested, but accompany him to avoid stories.
3. Talk (just d 2 of u) about the way 4ward. The talk will entail -the child's future, -will he pay support, -wld d child be living wt U -every imp tg u feel concerns this topic
4. Sign a contract (just a paper or letter promising he ll never do this again) or pray 2gether asking him to promise God never to hurt u like this again
5. Make ur decision to go or not to go bk 2ur house. Pls do not go bk wt hurt. If u ever agree to return, never bring it up again esp in moments of anger that he cheated. Bc it's a new marriage, it's usually sweet and bitter. So in moments of bitterness, do not remind him of his deeds. Goodluck.
Haa! Almost 90% of LIBers are telling her to go back. Na wa ya oh. Abeg woman don't go back, if you love your life. He will continue to cheat and could possibly give you HIV. What a useless man with no shame. He doesn't even respect your parents. Otherwise why would he do such a thing? If you are independent, great. If not go and find a job and be self sufficient. Your family and people telling you to go back don't care about your well being. Please take care of your health so you can have a safe delivery. Men are so wicked. May God deliver us. Amen.
Naija people will never change oh. All these people saying this woman should go back are not serious. At this point its not even about just going back and trying to get things back to normal as someone said. This is about this woman's health and the health of her child. If he was having UNPROTECTED sex with his ex before she and this man were even married, there is a big chance he was doing the same thing with other women and will continue to do so if she goes back. Cheating on a spouse is NEVER ok even though many Nigerian women accept it. Getting a disease that has no cure is not a small thing and this woman should NOT go back. There are still good men out there and though its hard to raise a child by yourself, going back to this man is not worth the additional headache.
Pls go back to ur home. what if u neva knew about the other woman. Am not wishing her evil but wat if she loses the pregnacy or av a still birth. A similar tin happen to a friend's mum, she neva knew until the other lady's child died at 30,he was a male child older dn her own first child which is a female. Just pray for divine strenght, u really need it here. Dont listen to friends or family, just depend on God alone. it is well wit u.
If u know what's good for u, go back to ur home. The devil u know is better than the angel u don't know. If u don't go back, then u are given that woman the chance to have him all to her self.
He said he has not touched her after marriage to you. He is right from what you said her pregnancy is a month older than yours. Secondly, you snatched him away from her. Go back to his house.
This man lied in front of God,his wife, and the church the day he said his vows and married this woman and you want her to forgive and forget just like that?!
I'm sure most of you don't know how it feels to be betrayed by the one you love.... How do you want her to wake up beside him everyday and smile or forget the hurt,humilation and betrayal he has caused her? Do you think she can ever TRUST him again?
Marriage is meant to be fufilling and enjoyed not endured.. For Christ's sake this marriage is not up to a year and he has done this.. What will he do in 3years? It is one thing to be remorseful but what about genuine repentance?
As a woman, you should have standards and values you believe in. 21st cenutry women have spoilt men. Men cheat and because they know they will get away with it everytime just because they say sorry they do it again and again.. To the extent that women have conditioned themselves to believe that cheating is a norm.
Most women that have commented on this blog should be truthful to themselves.. If it was your husband, will you stay? Even the ones that know their husbands are cheating on them, ask them, they are not really happy..Just suffering and smiling and having unnecessay BP because of the wayward lifestyles of their husbands..
My candid advice is: If you are finacially stable and your parents can support you, MOVE ON and do things that will make you and you kid happy!!!!! Incase you are thinking of going back, Just know that the other woman and her kid will forever be part of your life if you stay in that marriage. For me, its better to be a single mother and have peace of mind than to be in a loveless marriage based on deceit and betrayal...
Your husband remains your husband, regardless of whatever he has done, but LIB reader please seek counselling from couples who have married 40 years and above, its not advisable to seek advice from some LIB readers because they are full of insults and abuses, especially from their comments. In as much as you want to share your pain here, its still not the best place for advice.
with d way everyone is yelling go back, y am i not surprised at d infidelity of Nigerian men? It is becoz society has made it so easy for men to cheat without fear of punishment, dat is y they will continue to push their luck!obviously d enemy in dis marriage isnt d other woman, it is d worthless he-goat who couldnt keep his boxers on! Feel free to go back to your husband but just know that this experience is not your last. Just pray he doesnt cheat on you with your friend, neighbour's daughter or worse, female relative! Mscheeeeeeeeeeeeew!!
Please go bak to ur husband, don't. Leave ur marriage like dat, worsE things ave happened Nd couples stil work it out, above all PRAY and it. WuLd be alrite. Cheers
I am a guy. I really dont know why some men like taking their wives for granted. I think every man should treat their wives with respect, sleeping with another woman is the ultimate act of disrespect. Just wondering why so many people here are falling over themselves, urging her to go back to him.If the reverse is the case, I know 99.9% you guys will be throwing stones at her. This man is a piece of shit and no woman would like to live with a piece of shit for the rest of their lives.
Men, this one is for you: Do unto your wives what you expect them to do unto you.
FROM THE COMMENTS HERE, MEN CHEAT SO THE WOMAN HAS TO ENDURE, ALL IN THE NAME OF MARRIAGE. A NIGERIAN MAN WILL HAVE A WIFE AT HOME AND BE FUCKING ALL THE GIRLS IN THE TOWN. AND PEOPLE WILL BE ADVISING THE WIFE TO REMAIN IN THE MARRIAGE. THAT IS WHY MANY WOMEN ARE MARRIED AND MISERABLE.
your marriage was over before it began. You knew perfectly well that your husband was sleeping with his ex.But u got married because of your pregnancy and hoping it was a permanent solution. Listen this marriage is not for you. Have your child, establish the necessary custody through the courts or mediation. But you do not need to go back for the sake of your child. In fact don't go back into a broken, bitter marriage because it will be unhealthy environment for your child to grow up in. Your child can have a father regardless of a marriage.
Please forgive him and go back but never trust him.You are carrying his child and it wont just make sense for you to remarry.Most men are unstable in their ways(i cant stop wondering why). May the Balm of Gilead heal your heart.
I cannot advise you on whether or not you should return to your matrimonial home.
I can however say this, pregnancy is a very complicated stage for a woman. Right now, there are so many hormones running through your body it's not even funny. My suggestion is for you to face your pregnancy, deliver safely, then consider all your options.
Tell your husband and your family that until your child is at least 4w old, the topic of you moving back home is not open for discussion. This is something you need to think over RATIONALLY. You should not make this decision lightly in your current emotional state.
I believe that you are justified in being hurt. Your husband also needs to PROVE & SHOW to you that he is sorry for causing that hurt.....and that it will never, ever happen again. You are the one who will determine what proving & showing it means.
Keep in mind that many times when we are hurt, forgiveness is a process. It can take days, weeks, months, or even years. Your husband may have to show and prove to you many times over the course of your marriage that he is contrite.
Also, while you are not discussing moving back home with anyone, you should be praying about the situation. Spend time talking to God and He will direct your path. He is also our loving Father, who comforts us in our darkest moments and gives peace in all stormy situations.
Pray that God will direct your path -- whether to return to your matrimonial home or not. I will keep you in my prayers and ask that God grant you peace.
I cannot advise you on whether or not you should return to your matrimonial home.
I can however say this, pregnancy is a very complicated stage for a woman. Right now, there are so many hormones running through your body it's not even funny. My suggestion is for you to face your pregnancy, deliver safely, then consider all your options.
Tell your husband and your family that until your child is at least 4w old, the topic of you moving back home is not open for discussion. This is something you need to think over RATIONALLY. You should not make this decision lightly in your current emotional state.
I believe that you are justified in being hurt. Your husband also needs to PROVE & SHOW to you that he is sorry for causing that hurt.....and that it will never, ever happen again. You are the one who will determine what proving & showing it means.
Keep in mind that many times when we are hurt, forgiveness is a process. It can take days, weeks, months, or even years. Your husband may have to show and prove to you many times over the course of your marriage that he is contrite.
Also, while you are not discussing moving back home with anyone, you should be praying about the situation. Spend time talking to God and He will direct your path. He is our loving Father, who comforts us in our darkest moments and gives peace in all stormy situations.
Pray that God will direct your path -- whether to return to your matrimonial home or not. I will keep you in my prayers and ask that God grant you peace.
My dear, that's the most important part of your situation. From the depths of the heart the mouth speaks. You are not interested in going back, and that is okay.
Women are NOT born to serve and slave and suffer. We are NOT born to grin and bear the indiscretions of men. We are NOT born to be miserable for our entire lives and be subservient to men.
Women are strong and courageous in all situations.
Pray about your situation my sister, and if -- at the end of the day -- you do not return to your matrimonial home, you will undoubtedly still find happiness in this life. You will not be the first (or last) woman to raise her child alone.
Men who read these go back to your husband chorus would be stupid not to cheat sha...cos they cheat and have nothing to lose. They know ur miserable arses ain't leaving them even when they bring HIV come
Half of the bitches saying go back to him are probably mistresses cheating with other women's husbands....low life shady women. Why would you tell her to go back to a man who has wasted no time showing the filthy pig he is
my dear go to ur home, yes its urs and no body can take that from u. just sit back and realise what God did for u by giving u a baby,cherish it and forget abt d man..let ur baby be ur consolation..love him and live him but dont leave him without a father's love. do it for him (ur baby)
abeg jo. he's not worth it. stay with your parents and find a good job that can help you support your child. your family will always help you. that whole "go back before she steals you husband" and "go before he stops begging" is quite stupid. it's not a race to see who can get him faster. the fact that people want you to fight for a guy who betrayed you is atrocious. let her have the bastard. he can beg all he wants. God helps those who help themselves. a lot of single mothers are doing fine and so are their children. this is not something you have to endure. if he stops begging, all the better. go and live your life and give your child a good future so they can respect you as the strong woman that u are.
my dear i know it hurts but u shouldn't have left at the first place,i advice u go back to ur husband and sort things out if not the so called ex is also pregnant for him nd will soon park to ur home if u delay more,Linda post my comment pls.
It's less than a year and this is what you will deal with for the rest of ur life?? It is really easy for people to say go back.my dear what ever gives you peace.
I really feel for you but to be honest if he is good to you go back. I have a number of guy friends and if you hear the things some of their ex's do to get them back before they get married you will pity your husband. One guy even caught a girl trying to squeeze the sperm she collected from the condom into her privates!! Don't get me wrong, he is an ass for going near her in the first place but my darling, if he is worth it, fight for that man and use prayer to send that home wreaker where she belongs...
My dear pls if you search your heart and know he is good to you please go back. I have close guy friends and if you hear the things that some of their ex's get up to once they hear they are getting married you will pity some men. It would take a man with his heart deeply hidden in the Lord to resist. One of them even caught a girl trying to squeeze sperm collected from the condom into her privates to get pregnant....Don't get me wrong i think he is a complete ass for what he did but sister if that man is worth fighting for wear your karate uniform and tie your black belt, then descend on that home wreaker with the power of prayer...ask God to help you love your step child cause the child has done no wrong, but make sure the rules are laid down before you go back...However,you have to let go of the hurt before you go back and dont bring it up again, until you can do that don't go back because bitterness and anger will just make this horrible situation extremely horrendous.. *hugs* I wish you a safe delivery..
nawa o Nigerian women are scary, what kind of advice are you giving this poor lady. My dear do what will make your happy search within yourself and follow your heart. Disregard all this nonsense advice.
ummh...........!how funny men can can behave,but ma i will advise u go back 1. for the purpose of the unbourn child 2. to safe ur marriage 3. for ur future.u deserve to be happy and is too early for this marriage drama also i will like u to make let his family know abt this and state ur terms and conditions. to crown it all GET CLOSER TO GOD. i think u need him more , i feel u arnt closer enough
just get closer to GOD and let him direct u.who knows the future. u should be happy u even know now not after 20 yrs of marriage u discover ur man has another family outside.before marriage we need to be closer to GOD even if ur patner pretend , GOD will still direct u and feel it from within dat sometin isnt right somewhere, but we alyz ignore this feelings and do our desire, my dear,it not too late now TALK TO GOD ,if u should move back in or not. u dont need our decision to do.ONLY GOD can direct u. keep faith dear
Na wa for some women on this blog oo! She should go back to which matrimonial home?!
When you catch another woman and your husband on your bed, dont do anything oo! Join the fun on the so called matrimonial bed, Infact tell them to excuse you while you change the bedsheets!! *kmt*
Go back to him, let him take care of you and the baby,never sleep with him without protection. Have an action plan, get fit, look better than when you met him, get him to set up a business for you or travel out and become a citizen in a better country and then leave his ass for someone better. Fuck him!he aint neva gonna change.
i just want to share my testimony here.. i was married for 15 years to my husband and all of a sudden, another woman came into the life of my husband.. he started hailing me and he was abusive..but i still loved him with all my heart and wanted him at all cost…then he filed for divorce..my whole life was turning apart and i didn't know what to do..he moved out of the house and abandoned me and my 5 kids.. so someone told me about trying spiritual means to get my husband back and introduced me to a spell caster called wiseindividualspell…so i decided to try it reluctantly..although i didn't believe in all those things… then when he cast the spell, after 3 days that he told me, my husband came back and was pleading..he had realized his mistakes..i just couldn't believe it.. anyways we are back together now and we are happy..in case anyone needs this man help, his email address wiseindividualspell@gmail.com his spells is for a better life.
Some girls are so useless, I know one who dated a guy, he left her, got married and a month after started screwing her. His marriage is a year old and he's still sleeping with his ex... Sometimes I wonder why some gals re so dumb... I pity the wife b4 the girl gives him HIV cos she's a serious bigtime abuja runs girl.. She comes to this blog #u know yourself. Better stop before u die on top person husband#
Sad n Unfortunate...u gotta try again.Give it a shot,but with care n precision dz tym around. @female LIBers,1st u generalized men...then Nigerian and African men...b4 goin down 2 Igbo men.Men aint d only occupants of planet earth...women have their flaws too #just saying
dont forget, for better and for worse, move back not just for urself but for God, and put ur mind on God, u cannot change ur husband therefore allow God to do the work...ur husband is a man and will make mistakes. Open your mind to other things and concentrate on urself....
Hello every one, i just want to share a few testimony about how my marriage got saved by drsambolspelltemple01@gmail.com . I had a fight with my husband and he got mad at me and decided to bring in another woman, i know i did wrong and was scared of loosing him, when he brought in another woman to the house, i thought i have lost him already and that was when i had to use drsambolspelltemple01@gmail.com spell and i was amazed the way the spell turned the table around and made my husband start chasing me and want to be with me again. am so happy now that my husband is back to me and me alone
Hello every one, i just want to share a few testimony about how my marriage got saved by drsambolspelltemple01@gmail.com . I had a fight with my husband and he got mad at me and decided to bring in another woman, i know i did wrong and was scared of loosing him, when he brought in another woman to the house, i thought i have lost him already and that was when i had to use drsambolspelltemple01@gmail.com spell and i was amazed the way the spell turned the table around and made my husband start chasing me and want to be with me again. am so happy now that my husband is back to me and me alone
Please go back, don't give the other woman a chance to fully take over. may God help you to hold on. same story with my dad & mum, but today she says staying was worth it
Please go back, don't give the other woman a chance to fully take over. may God help you to hold on. same story with my dad & mum, but today she says staying was worth it
i have been married for 4years and i have a break up with my husband 3months ago and i was worried and so confuse because i love him so much. i was really going too depressed and a friend directed me to this spell caster Dr. Magbu and i made all my problems known to him and he told me not to worry that he was going to make my husband to come back to me and in just 48hours i receive a call from my husband and he was appealing that i should come back to the house. i have never in my life believe in spell and but now it have just helped me and i am now so happy. All Thanks to him and if you also want to have your Husband back to yourself here !! his email Address reunitingexspell@gmail.com, i am so happy to testify of your work and kindness
342 comments:
«Oldest ‹Older 201 – 342 of 342Sweetheart,go back home and stay stand by your man. He was wrong but that is your home. For him to have chose you over the other lady shd mean a lot to you. She is d one who shd be seeking for advise,not you. All the best.
pls go back to ur home and sort tins out. If u leave someone else will step in and occupy ur positn happily.
You gat not better option than to go back....#wink
go back my dear
Madam plz go back nd work on ur marriage, I understand ur pain but u shuld forgive him nd let peace reign. D success of any marriage depends on a woman. I wish u safe delivery.
He hasn't touched her cos she's pregnant.He's a dog but let's face it.u knew u were marrying a cheat,u knew she was lurking around somewhere but u were too despErate to marry.
My advice is for you to go back&have your child there while hoping he stays faithful to you.If you don't have ur child there,the other woman will&they'll live happily ever after
he can neva change.if u go back, be sure of managing poligamy. he is fuckin betrayal
i will advice u go back to ur matrimonial home and have ur baby and take ur rightful place before someone else does. for ur husband u have to pray to God to touch his life. the ball is in ur court.Anger will not help[ the situation so my dear go to God in prayers and he will see u thru.
My dear I know u re deeply hurt but pls let it go, habouring such pain is not healthy for n ur baby pls let it go. I pray God will heal ur heart. And pls go back to ur hubby d mistake is done don't let d devil win. I don't know u but pls forgive him, reach into ur heart n remember y u married him.
U are foolish. How is the other woman a 'kill joy'? Didn't u read dat d idiotic husband slept with her till his wedding? this woman's husband is her 'kill joy', not the other woman. Olodo
Go bak home woman, God wil direct u̶̲̥̅̊ in all ur doings
Pls go back to your hubby
I am not married but from the experiences I have seen.... Ma pls go back to your husband.give peace a chance and ask God to heal your marriage. As for the child, I mean the other child, both of u shld come to an agreement as regards to the child, in fact family and u shld see the other lady, so if she is presently planning a wedding in her head, she can like to erase the dream ASAP. But go back first and start loving ur husband again.
No man is perfect expect our Lord Jesus Christ, go back and make it work, forgive him,love him and shelter him. Mostly forget without forgetting u wont make it work. Go home and pray. Please dont make your child be in the touture of growing up in a single home
since the schmuck (forgive me for calling him that, but he is) is begging you to go back, just go. The truth is that he has a wandering third leg. And sweet heart, hope you are not a full time house wife, pls find something and do. God will help us.
Jst go back to ur husband's huz...accept it as destiny...coz if u leave him n marry anoda u dnt knw wht u will dere agsib.jst continue to pray fr him.
Pls my lady go back. don't do what u will regret in d future. He married u and not her,he choose u over her even if she is pregnant for him. u said d vows pls pick ur broken pieces and move on to make ur home. the bible said that a wise woman builds her home but a foolish one destroys it. no matter what pls be strong.
Yes he slept with her a month to your wedding! We understand how heart wrenching that must be for you. Hmmmmm. Can you forgive him? Yes. Does he deserve a second chance? YES. Will he hurt me again? Probably still Yes! Can I stand the hurt and pain? YES. Dear Sister,I want you to take note of 3 very important issues on ground. Firstly,he married YOU and not her. Secondly,from your letter,he has expressed remorse over his actions and still loves you. Hence his "begging". Thirdly, your baby needs to take his/her rightful place in his/her Father's house. Taking these into consideration,your marriage deserves a second chance. So forgive your man and go back home.
Pls go back to ur husband....d earlier d beta
nne go back to ur marriage pls
Wow this is deep
She will take him for sure if u don’t want him
The choice is yours
If u take him back. She will still always be there as she has been before u even got married
I advise that if u do take him back move to another state........for real
The further away u are
The less opportunities he has to be with her
Move away
its a pity such unfaithful man....i feel ur pain dear, dont give up now, you have gone far...u have a victory to be won since he has come begging .. give him the second chance.its ur home go back and be praying for ur hubby he needs a touch from God....am so sorry this kind of man is not meant to dwell with human being is to put him in the zoo and be feeding him 2geda with monkey that is were he belong.
Please go back to your home... you may think you are hurt now but i tell u, hurt can not describe how u will feel if the other woman moves in with ur husband.
my dear pls dnt go back oo,he will impregnant another girl.just give me his phone number and house address let me send one of my unmarried friends there to tell him what he did is not right.
you are def a learner.pls u pple should ignore dis one jor they vex there
My advise to u is to suck it all in, go back home and give ur marriage a second chance.we live in a terrible world!!!!!!!!!!!!!.
Yea,go back home and set ur rules straight!
The woman is not allowed in your matrimonial home
Your husband is only responsible for the child she's carrying and nothing like love or unnecesary closeness between him amd d woman etc.. Just make sure u state your rules..
The lord is your strenght
over sabi christian, what is wrong with her sharing her pains on blog, dont u know somebody with same pain can be consoled here. over sabi spiro
My sis pls go back home to your husband if you genuniely love him. It doesn't mean you stupid or that you can't do better for yourself. All you need to do, is to be more prayer and rebuild ur home.
My prayer for your husband ex unborn child, is for the baby not to be the one to suffer for the sins the mother has committed.
Abeg go and sit down in a spiked pit.
Isn't it whatever d man deposited in her,she wld deliver in d long run?..What role does she play in choosing her baby's sex?..Myopic african
I just read Annie Macaulay Idibia's interview in TW magazine...is some parts i felt she sounded still bitter and angry and in some parts she's happy if you ask me. The bottom line is she would never trust 2face again 100% even if she loves him with all her heart. Annie has to deal with 5 kids from 2 women my dear how do you compare that?
I feel like helping you kill the bastard, my dear i know how you feel well not as someone who has gone through the same thing but as a woman myself i can imagine. My boss did the same thing he had a girl with his ex (who is now 11) a month to his wedding he slept with the same woman and had a second child, his wife was crushed but married him still but am sure doesn't trust him 100%. The stories abound my dear, just be still cut out all the external voices and listen to what your inner voice tells you.If you pray its time to do so with allll your might. Its easy for all the 223 people who have commented before me to say GO BACK HOME but if they were in your shoes it would be HARD. My dear your answer is inside you, complete strangers can't help you make up your mind if you feel a second chance is what you want, by all means if not have your baby and move on.
see this chick o...u re still asking if u shuld go bak?
My dear, if Annie Maculay could accept 2-face back even after he impregnated several women who had loads of kids for him...Then i dont see any reason why you shouldnt go back to your matrimonial home.
Its called SHIT and it happens a lot.
Get ur self together and GO BACK to ya man...OSISO !!!
DO WHAT IS BEST FOR YOUR UNBORN CHILD.DEED HAS BEEN DONE,ITS FORGIVEABLE BUT NOT FORGETABLE.GO BACK TO YOUR HOME AND HELP YOUR HUSBAND TIDY UP THE MESS DATS Y U R HIS WIFE.
LINDA POST MY COMMENT O.MAMA AFRICA
going back shudnt b ur priority for now bt having a safe delivery . Look for a Gud place to stay n ve ur baby safely after dat u can tink of going bak. Cos d ex mite decided to go diabolical so u wnt survive child birth so she can cm in pls b wise n careful.
HMMMM men! they are a case to study, i acrually see myself in a similar situation but mine is not the pregnancy stuff, i think they are just a necessary devil, you just have to pray and fight back to be the number one, as for him not cheating else where? i doubt it! men of this days think cheating is normal, some men even think when they dont cheat they get bore, no true love again, i will advice you to go back home and pray to God to give you the stregnth to carry on, your child will always be the real child of the house be it girl or boy, so just be calm somethings are just meant to be, i will advice you to pray to God to lead you on how to cope with him, cus my dear, its HARDDDDDDDDDDDDD! but good luck and go back home! whew! #omosexy
You are not serious to have done that, or do you want to give way for someone to come in? Please put yourself together and rush back home and try to make your husband tired of sex so he won't have time to look out.
please go back to ur husbands housem God Almighty wil help u tru. and dont forget to always pray for him. it is well wit ur home. Linda pls post my comment or is there a reqmnt one must av before u post ones comment?
Yur age is not important in this matter,pls grow up my dear
Shut up stupid boy..have respect 4 ur mother
Left with me, I think she should stay away for a while and see what happens cos the way i see it, he'll continue even after you forgive him and go back. how could he get his ex pregnant just 1 month to his wedding.
you made ur bed darling leave with it.dont ever go into marriage thinking a man will change. he probably married you cos u tolerate infidlity. u knew abot d other woman and did nothing thinking saying i do at d altar will change anything. Anne is happy with tuface look at the brighter side of things u get to be d one with d ring on her finger and other r outside. never for one moment think that he will change cos there is something definitly taking him to the other lady and it will continue so dont be deceived. Be objective and share ur man. Goodluck LADIES STOP HUSSELING MEN UNA NO GO HEAR
Goodday, sorry for the disappointment from your husband. This is my first comment on linda's blog just bcos I love u. Please, go back home. If u are a christian, pray to God and seek guidance from the holy spirit. Did u hear from God concerning ur marriage. If no, please see ur pastor and he will tell u wot 2 do. May God bless you and your family.
Look- people that are steering you to go back arent looking out for you. He cheated and he's probably still screwing her. Number 1: do you truly love him? If you do, don't go back right away. Teach him a lesson and make him suffer. If he's an option, go back now, use him and leave his ass once you're back on your feet.
Seems like you snatched the guy from the chic that's why he continued to see her until you guys got married. He still has a thing for his ex!
She probably was at your wedding!
You are confused because you are not a sincere person. u would have told us how u ended up with a man who is clearly still in love with his supposed to be ex........
Both of you ladies are a month apart. you said she was 5 months gone when you were six months gone. I feel you took in for him to cement your hold on the guy when he clearly did not love you as his heart still somehow belonged to this other woman you call his ex.
My dear, i know society demands that you go back to continue with your marital vows... but if you know that..
1. you will forever be unhappy.... let the courts annul the wedding.
2. Believe me, even though he will never hit you or be unkind to you, the fact that you are aware another woman has a child the same age as yours will continue to eat you up till you die.
3. The fact he isn't abusive, you will be unhappy in that union because you are aware of the times he will have to see his child or hang out .... you know to try to be a good dad to his other child. If you know you can live with this knowledge and still be happy in your home..... then you can go back.... the deed has already been done .. no need crying over spilled milk right?
but if you know you can not come to terms with the knowledge that he lied to you during and after you courtship and wedding, he was cheating on you without a condom thereby putting your health at risk(all dem yamayama stds), you will never love him pre knowing about the other belle, TRUST the main catalyst for a successful relationship has been broken..... you know how e take be you for mind cos you r wearing the tight shoes.... Be a single mum and move on or stay.
You can always find happiness again with someone else or still with him.... but as humans we r no matter how you try to tell yourself he is forgiven, there will always be that thing called doubt and you will always be unhappy as long as u r in that house with that particular man! Do the maths.... your happiness and sanity or emotional breakdown which is very difficult to overcome.....
Professionally yours,
The MArtian
Pls o libers,putting dis woman's case aside awhile. If u keep saying for better for worse,are u insinuating that a woman who is living wit a drunk,smoker n who is being abused verbally,emotionally,mentally constantly to the extent that she's fast depreciating,loosing her self esteem and bcoming suicidal bcos of the heat of the whole mess should remain wit such man despite no child has sealed up such marriage yet. Its my very own real story and I'l b grateful to have responses too.THANK YoU
Please go back home.Quickly too.
Everyone is saying 'go back', Go back to what exactly?The next thing he will tell you is that he has decided to make her his second wife to 'keep the peace'!
You will live in so much sorrow and bitterness if you go back, and i am not saying that you will not get over it but it will take a lot a courage and Grace, rising and falling.
Go back to what exactly? The fact that the ex girlfriend now has the pleasure of watching you suffer cos she knows she has a right to your husbands attention because of the child they have together?
Go back to what exactly? The fact that African society has made gullible women believe that a marriage of pain is better than none at all, or that the next man you meet will be a monster and this is as good as it gets, so you should endure humiliation instead?
Go back to what exactly? Because The society will deem you a weakling if you allow another woman to 'wreck your home'so you should stay and clean up the mess?
If you go back, let it be a divinely guided decision, but i assure you it will be not be easy, your healing will take years.
And If you are ready for the long, painful but rewarding of forgiveness, and the shenanigans that come with it. take a step in that direction, otherwise walking away is easier for you,perhaps even better.....
Jamb Question. Google the answer na. Fool!
Hello Dear, Disappointments pains, anger do come in relationships including MARRIAGE, the difference is how you handle them when it occurs. Work on your emotion/feeling, step down on your anger, let the love you feel take the greater part of you in all situations (except if there was/is no love). Act for and in Love in all situation. Agree you will make you marriage work. Forgive him (especially because he is sorry) and move right back into your HOME. Remember the ex is hanging around and praying you never come back so that it becomes easier for her to move in and take over completely. A loser is he/she who runs from problems, face it! resolve it! and be happy you did! Remember its your love, your man, your marriage, your home, your future, your happiness... grab and dust it clean and hold for keeps. My prayers are with you dear.
dear, it hurts i know but would you want to get stay with a cheating bastard all your life?
baby leave this man and start afresh for him to have gone baq to this lady means you cant satisfy him and he has picked the lady over you, if u go back he will stay with u but visit the lady often cause of his child what do u think caused 2face to have so many children? when they go baq the ladies lure them baq into bed and remember she knows him better than u do.
A cheater will always be a cheater. I understand what you are going through. If you are not desperate for marriage, then I suggest you don't go back. If he is capable of doing this, then he might as well give you STD in future after you have forgiven him. On the other hand if you leave him, he will be miserable for the rest of his life, even if there is another woman in his life as I believe he married you for a reason. However you will also be miserable for a while if you leave him but will be fine afterwards. I value trust so much in a spouse and if something like this happends, it feels like a glas that has been broken. Although you can glue it together but it will never be the same again. This is not right. Its about time we africans take certain things serious especially women. If it were a woman who did this, it would have been an abomination. Why is it okay for men to do this and be forgiven. Very soon this will become a trend. I rest my case and good luck with your decision.
it is easy for everyone to say go back because they are not in your shoes. my dear stay with your parents give birth heal first and then decided for yourself what you want to do. at the end of the day you will have to live with the consequences of what ever decision you make. in my opinion if hes done it once he will most likely do it again.
pray about this before listening to anyone about what you should do
Go back home and then put rat poison in his favouite food. Useless man.
WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU PEOPLE BLAMING THE GUY? WHAT OF THE OTHER STUPID BITCH THAT SLEPT WITH HIM AND GOT PREGNANT?
MY SISTER PLEASE GO BACK TO YOUR HOUSE. WE ALL MAKE MISTAKES AND TRUST ME A MILLION AND ONE GIRLS GO THROUGH THIS EVERYDAY. GET OVER IT AND MOVE ON. KEEP YOURSELF BUSY AND PRAY.
ALL MEN ARE ALL THE SAME.
DO NOT MOVE FROM FRYPAN TO FIRE. AS LONG AS HE LOVES YOU AND YOU KNOW IT MAKE IT WORK!
pls go back home just for the sake of your un-born child,even wen it is had to forgive.
how come you are a month preggo ahead of his ex. if he truly stopped sleeping with her b4 u got married. then its one o 3thingz
1. hes not the father of her baby
2. guess you were preg b4 marriage
3. linda dis story z twisted or fabricated. if u like dont post the comment
Greenmomma
pls my dear go back to ur home and hve ur baby dat home s yours,and be prayerful it s well
Go back home to your husband. It is possible he is being blackmailed by that woman and that the child odes not belong to him! Have your baby in peace but make it clear to your husband that a paternity test must be done once that child is 6 months so that it can be esatblished once and for all that the child belongs to him. Besides, if he has agreed to change his ways, it will be foolish for you to stay away because the interloper will see it as an opportunity to move into your matrimonial home. It's alright to be angry at his betrayal but be wise and do the right thing...
WOMEN GO THROUGH A WHOLE LOT IN THIS COUNTRY REALLY. KAI!
Go back home. At least you aid it was before you guys got married, so this is hoping that it has never happened while you are married. He made a mistake, forgive and accept the change now. Ask God for wisdom on how to deal with the hurts and ache and try not to use your anger to push finally outside. Love conquers all my dear.
See this "small" girl, you think matrimonial homes is like they act it in movies and romance novels.
Ok now, stay in your parent's house now....continue staying there. Shebi your husband is still begging, let's see how long he will be humble enough before the "manly" arrogance get him.
Get KPMG or some of these churches to give you the statistics of the number of overdue single ladies out there, then you go know how far.
Nonsense....next topic.
please don;t go back but when your husband new wife give birth please visit her thank...
Wellll..... Cant say go or don't go because it has two sides, so certain elements of wisdom has to come to play and practice.My dad did same and there has been times of why did I and I am glad I did. So I reckon, you pray hard for direction especially because you are the only one in that shoe that bites. Condemnation of men or actions isn't the solution right now and one has to be careful not to be found judging! you just never know when your shoe would pinch ....
Almost everyone here is advising this lady to move back to her matrimonial home. Sadly, i agree with everyone though, but i think men need to begin to be disclipined enough to remain faithful to their wives because women are now beginning to go to any extent, to ensure that men pay for their infidelity. Men BE WARNED.
It seems (10:32) like you're the only 1 making sense.. Why put yourself and child through all the misery. Pray that God will see you through. You should leave with dignity and God spare ur health...
sweetheart pls go back. this his begging will soon end. u will get over it. it will be well
These comments....smh. See the common Nigerian mentality. Damn!
I guess i was just raised differently
How can you people he encouraging her to stay in a marriage where her husband clearly doesn't respect their union. I'm sure if the takes were turned, you lot would be encouraging the husband to send his wife packing. Nigerian mentally & marriage its the worst!! Sue me!!
Its until he brings her a bag of AIDS that all of you will change tone? I'm sure that's not the only woman he is cheating with.
Stories like this make me think about all the shit people say to Genevieve Nnaji, Rita Dominic, etc. Always telling them to get married, yet stories like this surface on the daily. I'm sure Genevieve and Rita are genuinely happy being single, instead of having to deal with BS like this story above
So think very clearly the next time you insult our actresses for being not married and/or bitter and frustrated like many of you married women on this blog.
Linda, post my comment please!!!
GO BACK HOME!!!!! DO NOT LEAVE YOUR MATRIMONIAL HOME FOR A SCUM TO INVADE YOUR PLACE. THAT IS YOUR THRONE, AND SHE IS JUST A SIDE PIECE!!! GO BACK HOME AND HAVE A GOOD TALK WITH YOUR HUSBAND, MEN DO THESE THINGS, WHICH DOESNT MAKE IT ACCEPTABLE BUT SHOULD MAKE YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD STRONGER.....NOTHING IT IMPOSSIBLE HE CAN CHANGE!
GOODLUCK :-)
everybody is just singing 'go back home, go back home' Mumu people.
a man who has the guts to cheat and does it without protection is the most callous of all men. it means he can never think straight and is myopic in his decision making.
ANON 2.34...IN MY HONEST OPINION, I WILL ADVICE THAT YOU LEAVE THAT MARRIAGE OF YOURS. IT MIGHT BE DIFFICULT TO DO BUT ALWAYS KNOW THAT MARRIAGE IS SUPPOSED TO BUILD YOU UP NOT TEAR YOU DOWN. FROM YOUR POST, YOU CANT THINK OF ANYTHING POSITIVE FROM YOUR MARRIAGE. MARRIAGE IS NOT A DO OR DIE AFFAIR. GET CLOSER TO GOD SO THAT HE WILL SEND YOUR SOUL MATE YOUR WAY.
AS FOR THE ORIGINAL POSTER, YOUR SITUATION IS VERY SAD AND MAY GOD HEAL YOUR PAIN. DRAW CLOSER TO GOD AND ENSURE THAT WHATEVER DECISION YOU MAKE IS FOR YOUR OWN GOOD AND HAPPINESS AND THAT OF YOUR BABY. WHETHER YOU DECIDE TO STAY WITH HIM OR TO STAY ON YOUR OWN, FORGIVE HIM FOR YOUR OWN PEACE OF MIND. EVEN IF YOU DECIDE TO DIVORCE YOUR HUSBAND OR NOT TO, FORGIVING HIM IS ONE OF THE MAIN REASONS THAT WOULD HELP YOU MOVE FORWARD.
ON ANOTHER NOTE, IT AMAZES ME HOW SOME NIGERIANS WILL FIND ALL SORTS OF REASONS TO EXCUSE AND FORGIVE A CHEATING MAN BUT WHEN A WOMAN DOES THE SAME EXACT THING, ALL HELL BREAKS LOOSE. WOMEN WILL BASH THE OFFENDING LADY LIKE THERE IS NO TOMORROW BECAUSE THE LADY'S ACTIONS REMINDS THEM OF THEMSELVES OR WHAT THEY ARE CAPABLE OF DOING (I.E SLEEPING AROUND) AND MEN WILL CALL HER ALL SORTS OF NAME TO MAKE THEMSELVES FEEL BETTER ABOUT THEIR CHEATING WAYS. BEFORE YOU CALL A CHEATING WOMAN NAMES, ALWAYS REMEMBER THAT MOST OF THE MEN THAT CHEAT SLEEP WITH WOMEN, SO, IF YOU CAN EXCUSE THE MAN OF HIS ACTIONS YOU SHOULD ALSO FIND A REASON OR MORE TO EXCUSE THE ACTIONS OF THE WOMAN HE SLEPT WITH. WHEN LINDA POSTED A PICTURE OF COCO, ICE T'S WIFE ON HERE WITH A MAN GRABBING HER BUTT, NOBODY SAID IN HER DEFENSE THAT SHE IS ONLY BUT HUMAN AND LIABLE TO MAKE MISTAKES. BUT A MAN IMPREGNATES HIS EX AND HIS WIFE AT ABOUT THE SAME TIME, AND PEOPLE STARTS RECALLING THAT NO ONE IS PERFECT. WHAT A PITY.
I DO NOT AND WILL NEVER SUPPORT CHEATING BUT I TRY TO BE OBJECTIVE IN MY REASONING.
please go back and meet your hubby , its bond to happen but you have to be strong forgive your husband and live happy with him for the sake of your baby.
Correct !!!!!!! All of u sayin go back , matrimonial home. if its d wife dt cheated e go b different story. all u girls sayin go back. u don settle for second class. Sorry o!!!!! If na American woman. she no need to ask!!!!mschewwww. tell d guy to disappear!
One happy parent is enof to care for a child. With ur family behind u.
You have to go back, and pray to God to have mercy on you and your family. The bible says When the foundation is faulty what can the righteous do?
Forgive and keep praying for him and also tell God to give you the grace to love him again cos its not easy.It is well with you and your family.
Na wa o!!! in ds country it seems like husbands can get away wit absolutely anything .. women must alw b d endurer. such a pity.. ...I'm better than an endurer.
Once a cheat, always a cheat. set standards for yourself and you will not be sleeping alone forever even if you leave this man forever. Nothing to say, this marriage is not doomed to end. He never left his ex and ex never left him. Very soon they will discover why they are good for each other and your husband will start acting out. Use your values, standards and wisdom to make your decision; you will never regret it.
I'm an East African woman and I am very shocked the way you Nigerians think.
This man obviously saw no problem with having UNPROTECTED sex with his ex and wife??
And you are telling her to go back???
Or you Nigerians don't have HIV and STDs in your country? Why would you advise someone to go back to a man who is/could potentially kill her.
Are you Nigerian women so desperate to be married?? My God you astound me with your thinking.
Don't Go!--and i mean DON'T GO##--i wld give u 10 reasons y u shldnt go#lemme start with d first---1.
I suspect yu hv a broken marriage n u want to help odaz break dierz 2!
Marriage is for better or worse....u had berra go back to ur man else d other woman will take care of him for you.... u shouldn't have even left in the first place,it only shows that u are weak!
Marriage is for better or worse....u had berra go back to your man or d other woman will help u take care of him... u shouldn't have even left in the first place,,it only shows how weak u are!
My dear life is a double edge sword.Marriage is for better n for worst,so u gat to deal wt it. running away will nt solve the issue rarher u got it worsen.take the challenge.
and if the reverse was the case you know the man will never take you back. I am not saying you should leave your husband, do what makes you. Unfortunately woman are treated like garbage in Africa.
Plssssssssssssssss go back dearie i belive he he will come back home
Plssssssssssssssss go back dearie i belive he he will come back home
Plssssssssssssssss go back dearie i belive he he will come back home
Almost everybody on this blog has said go back to hubby. But the reasons are very diverse and confusing.
A. Bc she's having a baby, so that the child will be trained.
B. Men are cheat, she shld suck up wt it.
C. The other lady will move in.
My reply
A. A child trained by a single parent who is loved is definitely better and rounded than one who grows up in a bitter and loveless family.
B. Not all men cheat, pls let's accord whatever percentage that don't the respect they deserve.
C. She can move for all u care, just so u have ur peace of mind.
My thots on d matter
1. The dangers of a cheating husband or wife is not just the offsprings, but HIV and STDs esp the recent resistant-strain of gonorrhea.
2. Is he really contrite? But then how wld u know, humans can manage all forms of deceit.
3. Wld it continue like this? Nobody knows!
Way forward
1. Since this has been made a public issue, the fact the family members are now involved makes it that, let's make it private again. Reason is that one day he will come to respect you for guarding ur family resolution and terms.
2. U and ur hubby will go 4 HIV and STD test again, and if possible repeat the test after 6months. Ur ante-natal has covered u and I'm sure u must have been tested, but accompany him to avoid stories.
3. Talk (just d 2 of u) about the way 4ward. The talk will entail -the child's future, -will he pay support, -wld d child be living wt U -every imp tg u feel concerns this topic
4. Sign a contract (just a paper or letter promising he ll never do this again) or pray 2gether asking him to promise God never to hurt u like this again
5. Make ur decision to go or not to go bk 2ur house. Pls do not go bk wt hurt. If u ever agree to return, never bring it up again esp in moments of anger that he cheated. Bc it's a new marriage, it's usually sweet and bitter. So in moments of bitterness, do not remind him of his deeds. Goodluck.
madam east african ...dont allow nigerians to face you o..they have very sharp mouth....
Haa! Almost 90% of LIBers are telling her to go back. Na wa ya oh. Abeg woman don't go back, if you love your life. He will continue to cheat and could possibly give you HIV. What a useless man with no shame. He doesn't even respect your parents. Otherwise why would he do such a thing? If you are independent, great. If not go and find a job and be self sufficient. Your family and people telling you to go back don't care about your well being. Please take care of your health so you can have a safe delivery.
Men are so wicked. May God deliver us. Amen.
Naija people will never change oh. All these people saying this woman should go back are not serious. At this point its not even about just going back and trying to get things back to normal as someone said. This is about this woman's health and the health of her child. If he was having UNPROTECTED sex with his ex before she and this man were even married, there is a big chance he was doing the same thing with other women and will continue to do so if she goes back. Cheating on a spouse is NEVER ok even though many Nigerian women accept it. Getting a disease that has no cure is not a small thing and this woman should NOT go back. There are still good men out there and though its hard to raise a child by yourself, going back to this man is not worth the additional headache.
Pls go back to ur home. what if u neva knew about the other woman. Am not wishing her evil but wat if she loses the pregnacy or av a still birth. A similar tin happen to a friend's mum, she neva knew until the other lady's child died at 30,he was a male child older dn her own first child which is a female. Just pray for divine strenght, u really need it here. Dont listen to friends or family, just depend on God alone. it is well wit u.
If u know what's good for u, go back to ur home. The devil u know is better than the angel u don't know. If u don't go back, then u are given that woman the chance to have him all to her self.
He said he has not touched her after marriage to you. He is right from what you said her pregnancy is a month older than yours. Secondly, you snatched him away from her. Go back to his house.
''...see love is a society
any fool can not belong 'cuz the minute you hurt love
Then it's over and done''.
It's okay and easy to tell her to go back to her husband but what will be the state of the marriage? Your heart wont lie to you.
Some people amaze me on this blog!
This man lied in front of God,his wife, and the church the day he said his vows and married this woman and you want her to forgive and forget just like that?!
I'm sure most of you don't know how it feels to be betrayed by the one you love.... How do you want her to wake up beside him everyday and smile or forget the hurt,humilation and betrayal he has caused her?
Do you think she can ever TRUST him again?
Marriage is meant to be fufilling and enjoyed not endured.. For Christ's sake this marriage is not up to a year and he has done this.. What will he do in 3years? It is one thing to be remorseful but what about genuine repentance?
As a woman, you should have standards and values you believe in. 21st cenutry women have spoilt men. Men cheat and because they know they will get away with it everytime just because they say sorry they do it again and again.. To the extent that women have conditioned themselves to believe that cheating is a norm.
Most women that have commented on this blog should be truthful to themselves.. If it was your husband, will you stay?
Even the ones that know their husbands are cheating on them, ask them, they are not really happy..Just suffering and smiling and having unnecessay BP because of the wayward lifestyles of their husbands..
My candid advice is: If you are finacially stable and your parents can support you, MOVE ON and do things that will make you and you kid happy!!!!! Incase you are thinking of going back, Just know that the other woman and her kid will forever be part of your life if you stay in that marriage. For me, its better to be a single mother and have peace of mind than to be in a loveless marriage based on deceit and betrayal...
Your husband remains your husband, regardless of whatever he has done, but LIB reader please seek counselling from couples who have married 40 years and above, its not advisable to seek advice from some LIB readers because they are full of insults and abuses, especially from their comments. In as much as you want to share your pain here, its still not the best place for advice.
with d way everyone is yelling go back, y am i not surprised at d infidelity of Nigerian men? It is becoz society has made it so easy for men to cheat without fear of punishment, dat is y they will continue to push their luck!obviously d enemy in dis marriage isnt d other woman, it is d worthless he-goat who couldnt keep his boxers on! Feel free to go back to your husband but just know that this experience is not your last. Just pray he doesnt cheat on you with your friend, neighbour's daughter or worse, female relative! Mscheeeeeeeeeeeeew!!
go home anyone can make a mistake, 2 parent is better than 1
Please go bak to ur husband, don't. Leave ur marriage like dat, worsE things ave happened Nd couples stil work it out, above all PRAY and it. WuLd be alrite. Cheers
I am a guy. I really dont know why some men like taking their wives for granted. I think every man should treat their wives with respect, sleeping with another woman is the ultimate act of disrespect. Just wondering why so many people here are falling over themselves, urging her to go back to him.If the reverse is the case, I know 99.9% you guys will be throwing stones at her. This man is a piece of shit and no woman would like to live with a piece of shit for the rest of their lives.
Men, this one is for you: Do unto your wives what you expect them to do unto you.
Go back home and stop asking foolish question. If u dont the ex will. Whose loss?
Thank God is not a news of u losing someone dear to u!God knows why.pick up ur broken hrt an mend it back.Only God can not fail u.B Hapi an move on
FROM THE COMMENTS HERE, MEN CHEAT SO THE WOMAN HAS TO ENDURE, ALL IN THE NAME OF MARRIAGE. A NIGERIAN MAN WILL HAVE A WIFE AT HOME AND BE FUCKING ALL THE GIRLS IN THE TOWN. AND PEOPLE WILL BE ADVISING THE WIFE TO REMAIN IN THE MARRIAGE. THAT IS WHY MANY WOMEN ARE MARRIED AND MISERABLE.
your marriage was over before it began. You knew perfectly well that your husband was sleeping with his ex.But u got married because of your pregnancy and hoping it was a permanent solution. Listen this marriage is not for you. Have your child, establish the necessary custody through the courts or mediation. But you do not need to go back for the sake of your child. In fact don't go back into a broken, bitter marriage because it will be unhealthy environment for your child to grow up in. Your child can have a father regardless of a marriage.
Please forgive him and go back but never trust him.You are carrying his child and it wont just make sense for you to remarry.Most men are unstable in their ways(i cant stop wondering why). May the Balm of Gilead heal your heart.
I cannot advise you on whether or not you should return to your matrimonial home.
I can however say this, pregnancy is a very complicated stage for a woman. Right now, there are so many hormones running through your body it's not even funny. My suggestion is for you to face your pregnancy, deliver safely, then consider all your options.
Tell your husband and your family that until your child is at least 4w old, the topic of you moving back home is not open for discussion. This is something you need to think over RATIONALLY. You should not make this decision lightly in your current emotional state.
I believe that you are justified in being hurt. Your husband also needs to PROVE & SHOW to you that he is sorry for causing that hurt.....and that it will never, ever happen again. You are the one who will determine what proving & showing it means.
Keep in mind that many times when we are hurt, forgiveness is a process. It can take days, weeks, months, or even years. Your husband may have to show and prove to you many times over the course of your marriage that he is contrite.
Also, while you are not discussing moving back home with anyone, you should be praying about the situation. Spend time talking to God and He will direct your path. He is also our loving Father, who comforts us in our darkest moments and gives peace in all stormy situations.
Pray that God will direct your path -- whether to return to your matrimonial home or not. I will keep you in my prayers and ask that God grant you peace.
***Lush
I cannot advise you on whether or not you should return to your matrimonial home.
I can however say this, pregnancy is a very complicated stage for a woman. Right now, there are so many hormones running through your body it's not even funny. My suggestion is for you to face your pregnancy, deliver safely, then consider all your options.
Tell your husband and your family that until your child is at least 4w old, the topic of you moving back home is not open for discussion. This is something you need to think over RATIONALLY. You should not make this decision lightly in your current emotional state.
I believe that you are justified in being hurt. Your husband also needs to PROVE & SHOW to you that he is sorry for causing that hurt.....and that it will never, ever happen again. You are the one who will determine what proving & showing it means.
Keep in mind that many times when we are hurt, forgiveness is a process. It can take days, weeks, months, or even years. Your husband may have to show and prove to you many times over the course of your marriage that he is contrite.
Also, while you are not discussing moving back home with anyone, you should be praying about the situation. Spend time talking to God and He will direct your path. He is our loving Father, who comforts us in our darkest moments and gives peace in all stormy situations.
Pray that God will direct your path -- whether to return to your matrimonial home or not. I will keep you in my prayers and ask that God grant you peace.
***Lush
"....but I don't know that I want to do that."
My dear, that's the most important part of your situation. From the depths of the heart the mouth speaks. You are not interested in going back, and that is okay.
Women are NOT born to serve and slave and suffer. We are NOT born to grin and bear the indiscretions of men. We are NOT born to be miserable for our entire lives and be subservient to men.
Women are strong and courageous in all situations.
Pray about your situation my sister, and if -- at the end of the day -- you do not return to your matrimonial home, you will undoubtedly still find happiness in this life. You will not be the first (or last) woman to raise her child alone.
I am doing it.
***Lush
Men who read these go back to your husband chorus would be stupid not to cheat sha...cos they cheat and have nothing to lose. They know ur miserable arses ain't leaving them even when they bring HIV come
Half of the bitches saying go back to him are probably mistresses cheating with other women's husbands....low life shady women. Why would you tell her to go back to a man who has wasted no time showing the filthy pig he is
so u re living ur home for anoda woman? please, pack all ur things and go n enjoy ur home. keeping u in d house means he loves u.
U r silly to bits
GBAM!
my dear go to ur home, yes its urs and no body can take that from u. just sit back and realise what God did for u by giving u a baby,cherish it and forget abt d man..let ur baby be ur consolation..love him and live him but dont leave him without a father's love. do it for him (ur baby)
abeg jo. he's not worth it. stay with your parents and find a good job that can help you support your child. your family will always help you. that whole "go back before she steals you husband" and "go before he stops begging" is quite stupid. it's not a race to see who can get him faster. the fact that people want you to fight for a guy who betrayed you is atrocious. let her have the bastard. he can beg all he wants. God helps those who help themselves. a lot of single mothers are doing fine and so are their children. this is not something you have to endure. if he stops begging, all the better. go and live your life and give your child a good future so they can respect you as the strong woman that u are.
pls go bak,sorry for the hurt its ur home u re the owner of ur home.dont let it for dog pls.for the sake of ur baby,it's ok to be angry for sure pls.
I'll advise that you go back and have your baby there! For the fact that he's begging and your family too. Forgive him and star a new love life.
For the fact that he's begging and the family too, it's okay to go back and try as much as possible to forgive him.
my dear i know it hurts but u shouldn't have left at the first place,i advice u go back to ur husband and sort things out if not the so called ex is also pregnant for him nd will soon park to ur home if u delay more,Linda post my comment pls.
Marriage shouldn't be a do or die affair. If it makes you want to go blind, WALK AWAY!
It's less than a year and this is what you will deal with for the rest of ur life?? It is really easy for people to say go back.my dear what ever gives you peace.
if u are a foolish woman then move back 2 that house so that he can get another woman pregnant b4 u learn then move back
I really feel for you but to be honest if he is good to you go back. I have a number of guy friends and if you hear the things some of their ex's do to get them back before they get married you will pity your husband. One guy even caught a girl trying to squeeze the sperm she collected from the condom into her privates!! Don't get me wrong, he is an ass for going near her in the first place but my darling, if he is worth it, fight for that man and use prayer to send that home wreaker where she belongs...
my dear u bera go back into ur home before u allow the other lady have ur husband fully jst give ur marriage a second chance God be wiv u hun
My dear pls if you search your heart and know he is good to you please go back. I have close guy friends and if you hear the things that some of their ex's get up to once they hear they are getting married you will pity some men. It would take a man with his heart deeply hidden in the Lord to resist. One of them even caught a girl trying to squeeze sperm collected from the condom into her privates to get pregnant....Don't get me wrong i think he is a complete ass for what he did but sister if that man is worth fighting for wear your karate uniform and tie your black belt, then descend on that home wreaker with the power of prayer...ask God to help you love your step child cause the child has done no wrong, but make sure the rules are laid down before you go back...However,you have to let go of the hurt before you go back and dont bring it up again, until you can do that don't go back because bitterness and anger will just make this horrible situation extremely horrendous.. *hugs* I wish you a safe delivery..
nawa o Nigerian women are scary, what kind of advice are you giving this poor lady. My dear do what will make your happy search within yourself and follow your heart. Disregard all this nonsense advice.
ummh...........!how funny men can can behave,but ma i will advise u go back
1. for the purpose of the unbourn child
2. to safe ur marriage
3. for ur future.u deserve to be happy and is too early for this marriage drama
also i will like u to make let his family know abt this and state ur terms and conditions.
to crown it all GET CLOSER TO GOD. i think u need him more , i feel u arnt closer enough
just get closer to GOD and let him direct u.who knows the future. u should be happy u even know now not after 20 yrs of marriage u discover ur man has another family outside.before marriage we need to be closer to GOD even if ur patner pretend , GOD will still direct u and feel it from within dat sometin isnt right somewhere, but we alyz ignore this feelings and do our desire, my dear,it not too late now TALK TO GOD ,if u should move back in or not. u dont need our decision to do.ONLY GOD can direct u. keep faith dear
Na wa for some women on this blog oo! She should go back to which matrimonial home?!
When you catch another woman and your husband on your bed, dont do anything oo! Join the fun on the so called matrimonial bed, Infact tell them to excuse you while you change the bedsheets!! *kmt*
Go back to him, let him take care of you and the baby,never sleep with him without protection. Have an action plan, get fit, look better than when you met him, get him to set up a business for you or travel out and become a citizen in a better country and then leave his ass for someone better. Fuck him!he aint neva gonna change.
And this is exactly why nigerian men are the way they are!
BECAUSE YOU STUPID WOMEN ALLOW THEM TO GET AWAY WITH ANYTHING
Look at all of you advising her to go back lol!
Till he gets another pregnant...
i just want to share my testimony here.. i was married for 15 years to my husband and all of a sudden, another woman came into the life of my husband.. he started hailing me and he was abusive..but i still loved him with all my heart and wanted him at all cost…then he filed for divorce..my whole life was turning apart and i didn't know what to do..he moved out of the house and abandoned me and my 5 kids.. so someone told me about trying spiritual means to get my husband back and introduced me to a spell caster called wiseindividualspell…so i decided to try it reluctantly..although i didn't believe in all those things… then when he cast the spell, after 3 days that he told me, my husband came back and was pleading..he had realized his mistakes..i just couldn't believe it.. anyways we are back together now and we are happy..in case anyone needs this man help, his email address wiseindividualspell@gmail.com his spells is for a better life.
Dont let her win. FIGHT!!!
Some girls are so useless, I know one who dated a guy, he left her, got married and a month after started screwing her. His marriage is a year old and he's still sleeping with his ex... Sometimes I wonder why some gals re so dumb... I pity the wife b4 the girl gives him HIV cos she's a serious bigtime abuja runs girl.. She comes to this blog #u know yourself. Better stop before u die on top person husband#
Sad n Unfortunate...u gotta try again.Give it a shot,but with care n precision dz tym around.
@female LIBers,1st u generalized men...then Nigerian and African men...b4 goin down 2 Igbo men.Men aint d only occupants of planet earth...women have their flaws too #just saying
dont forget, for better and for worse, move back not just for urself but for God, and put ur mind on God, u cannot change ur husband therefore allow God to do the work...ur husband is a man and will make mistakes. Open your mind to other things and concentrate on urself....
Hello every one, i just want to share a few testimony about how my marriage got saved by drsambolspelltemple01@gmail.com . I had a fight with my husband and he got mad at me and decided to bring in another woman, i know i did wrong and was scared of loosing him, when he brought in another woman to the house, i thought i have lost him already and that was when i had to use drsambolspelltemple01@gmail.com spell and i was amazed the way the spell turned the table around and made my husband start chasing me and want to be with me again. am so happy now that my husband is back to me and me alone
Hello every one, i just want to share a few testimony about how my marriage got saved by drsambolspelltemple01@gmail.com . I had a fight with my husband and he got mad at me and decided to bring in another woman, i know i did wrong and was scared of loosing him, when he brought in another woman to the house, i thought i have lost him already and that was when i had to use drsambolspelltemple01@gmail.com spell and i was amazed the way the spell turned the table around and made my husband start chasing me and want to be with me again. am so happy now that my husband is back to me and me alone
Please go back, don't give the other woman a chance to fully take over. may God help you to hold on.
same story with my dad & mum, but today she says staying was worth it
Please go back, don't give the other woman a chance to fully take over. may God help you to hold on.
same story with my dad & mum, but today she says staying was worth it
i have been married for 4years and i have a break up with my husband 3months ago and i was worried and so confuse because i love him so much. i was really going too depressed and a friend directed me to this spell caster Dr. Magbu and i made all my problems known to him and he told me not to worry that he was going to make my husband to come back to me and in just 48hours i receive a call from my husband and he was appealing that i should come back to the house. i have never in my life believe in spell and but now it have just helped me and i am now so happy. All Thanks to him and if you also want to have your Husband back to yourself here !! his email Address reunitingexspell@gmail.com, i am so happy to testify of your work and kindness
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