Dear LIB readers: I should have a say about the number of kids...
From a male LIB reader
My wife and I have one child and she's on family planning. Now she's saying she wants another child and I told her all I want is one. Our daughter is okay for me and that's all I want. She tells me I'm a selfish man and I say no that the economy is not smiling. .. and that since she's not working we cannot afford another child or even if we can, I do not see the need for that.
She tells me what if something happens to the only child and I ask her if having kids has become a gamble.
Honestly I feel that the one who provides for the family should decide the number of kids. I feel so because those who apply pressure on people to have kids only celebrate when the child is born and from there you are on your own.
And when things get tough, they start to call you a weak man who cannot provide for his family.
I just want one child and I'm satisfied with it.
Please do work it out within yourselves. It takes great understanding and compromise. Have a great week. Linda not all men are dogs pls!!! That "Linda take note" stupid commenter needs to be stoned honestly..she is as annoying as fuck..ugly bitch!!!
your wife maybe right on you cos a real man who believed in GOD will never be afraid of tomorrow or you dont have any good plans for your tomorrow?or do you married a white woman?
Oga, you are a very lazy poor man. So, you can't provide for at least 3 children. You should have stayed single since you are 2 lazy and 2 wretched to have just 3 children.
Oga na wa for you ooo...are you that broke to the extend that you can't cater for 4 children at least...it's good to always put the economy and income into consideration whenever having kids..always believe that God will provide for your family
Oga na wa for you ooo...are you that broke to the extend that you can't cater for 4 children at least...it's good to always put the economy and income into consideration whenever having kids..always believe that God will provide for your family
I am a woman...a feminist for that matter. This man is WISE. Do not have more children than you can afford. It is not easy at all for anyone out here these days. Oga, it is up to both of you how many children you should have not just you (that is selfish) but please show madam your purse. Let her see what goes in and comes out so she can understand that there is no left over money for child #2.
Well as a Sanetor, I will go with the Bible 'Genesis 22:17, Genesis 9:7:- And you, be ye fruitful, and multiply; bring forth abundantly in the earth, and multiply therein.' and many more versed supporting my Pastoral Vision.
for only God watches over a child or even if there are a thousand children, only God watches after them not their parents
But I totally agree with you Brotherly, we must multiply with caution, with with massive growth in population, it is necessary to cut your coat to your size.
Waoh, something that should have been discussed and agreed before marriage. Very important! But since you are married you can wait a few years. Maybe two kids you need to compromise and she can also decide to start something doing, so that she too can contribute financially to the home. Also in these times, It's better she is working too what if something happens to you and you can't provide enough for the family again?
she just wants the D... lol.. but on a more serious note, i think u should listen to her and make another baby if u can, if u're not ready now that's fine but i think i agree with her, u gotta have another child...
it is good to have a second child at least your daughter can have a brother or sister. but i really support you to resist such pressure from your wife to keep having children anyhow, as most women will mount pressure on their husband to have children, then later blame for failing to take care of them.
"Honestly I feel that the one who provides for the family should decide the number of kids "......WOW! That is the most selfish, degrading, insulting statement I've heard in a long time. You better cut off your egg plant then.
U ve a point, but consider second child as soon as ur income or earning improves. No point bringing dem to d world to suffer. Engage her more, she will see reasons with u. Ppl actually celebrate den turn dia back on u only to resurface wen he or she is made in life. #myopinion#
Mr. Man please wake up from that sleep of yours or don't you know that he who has a child owes death a big debt? Some thing like dis happens in my area to a family that has a child. The husband refused to have more children but the wife kept on persisting they should have more but unfortunately, the husband has refused allowing his wife to take in for another child. One faithful day, their only child was on his way back from school when suddenly an okada (bike) from no where slammed their child into a gutter and he died on the spot. So oga boss, you better wake up and begin to make babes otherwise u go regret am later oh. Person way get 1 pikin owe death dept oh go and ask to know more.
A girl is a great and precious gift from God, but pls if u have the oppo of having another, please do . So sge can hav a playmate, nigerian men r fascinated by male children
Am 100% behind u. Pls stick to ur decision till u re convinced and ready to av another baby . after all u re the head of the family and u av the final say . the bible said whoever that doesn't provide for his family is worse than an infidel. Martins Yemi Ibiloyè signing out. Gracia
Tell your wife there are people who lost all four children at once so that logic of having more kids incase something happens to one is wrong. And you are right, nobody would help take care of them kids for you (my mum had to fend for four kids when we lost my dad), all people want to do is eat naming rice. Whatever happens afterwards is your cup of tea. Goodluck
Mr Man, you are dead wrong. Decision on the number of kids to have should be made between you and your wife. You guys should reach a compromise. I don't think there is any woman out there who wants just one child. You guys can talk about the economy and decide if it's okay for her to get a job so as to have 2 incomes. Don't just shut it down. Hope you know she has the gun here, she knows her ovulation period and can go ahead and get pregnant by you without your permission. She's not going to beg you for long. You will come along after the baby is born. Bye.
One child is okay especially in this harsh economy.. But women with just female children always want a male child to balance it cos of insecurity so if she wants another child, please give it to her so that peace can reign.. Case closed#
pls try and hae a second child even though i agree with u abt the economy situation but all in all it is good to hae kids because they are the future of tomorrow and our joy
i understand your situation. But did you discuss this with your wife before marriage? It is a big risk to have just one child, and you should also understand your wife's situation also. You are a man, and you can have kids at any time. Your wife's clock for bearing kids will soon be over. To make it an agreeable situation, please do a vasectomy, so if anything happens to your only child, you will not go outside to have a child....GBAM.
Talk with ur dear love on mutual respect. put more insight of ur decision in her. display tolerant and show her that u also understood her pains, but if one child is all you want base on whatever ur reason may be, JUST LOCK UP:
Yes u re a selfish man!! How can just one child bcome a problem. How difficult wil it b to train 2kids. If u can train one,what makes u think God won't help u wen u av another. The child might even be a blessing to the family. Use ur head oh
Hmmmmm, dis is a real though one but if ur wife is not working coz u told her not too then please sir u will have to grant her dis request coz u were the one that told her not to work BT if its DAT she didn't just get a job due to d lack of employment in d country pls try to explain to her very well.
For an African this is quite remarkable; for lack of better word. It is rarely to find a man content with just one child and a female at that especially regarding lineage and all that sh*t! Anyway I say kudos to you, but know if your wife wants a kid, she would get it with or without your consent, as long as you have sex with her.
You should expend more energy on increasing your income, not claiming rights here. How much does it's take to add another child to the family? You sound like a very lazy man!
You both have a say and should learn to compromise. Let her have a second baby and later start work. Just because you are the one providing for the family does not mean you get to decide 1 is final.
It's not only your decision to make about having children, it involves the both of you. You should have told her this before marriage. But I think you should listen to her because it's not easy being an only child, consider your daughter being alone and see all her friends happy with their siblings, am talking from experience, we're two and I still wish I had more siblings. it's very sad and lonely, consider your daughter and wife, don't be selfish.
The only way u can have one child is to go get a snip. If u leave it up to ur wife, na OYO u de face. I blame ur wife sef that knows the kind of husband she has and still went ahead to take permission. What ever happened to just getting pregnant and telling you the good news. Mr one child.
U have a point there, but u should also consider her too, I dunno what ur earnings are but if u think another kid will be a burden then u should dialogue some more wit ur wife, explain to her and tell her to hang on until things improve financially
Am a woman and I know am stubborn and I react when I don't get what I want. You on d other hand have a right to ur opinion but try considering her and this is one of the reasons people need to discuss about kids with their partner before getting married
True talk for u said it all mostly d part "Economy is not smiling". I do say dis over, and over again, u don't tak children to d grave, and they r either asset or liability depends on which they fall.
So b wise wit ur choose of number of children u want to bring 2d world for gone r d days of God wil provide, and tak care of them.
Don't bring children 2d world to suffer for God wil hold u accountable for d poor choices of ur children. A word is enough 4d wise!
True talk for u said it all mostly d part "Economy is not smiling". I do say dis over, and over again, u don't tak children to d grave, and they r either asset or liability depends on which they fall.
So b wise wit ur choose of number of children u want to bring 2d world for gone r d days of God wil provide, and tak care of them.
Don't bring children 2d world to suffer for God wil hold u accountable for d poor choices of ur children. A word is enough 4d wise!
True talk for u said it all mostly d part "Economy is not smiling". I do say dis over, and over again, u don't tak children to d grave, and they r either asset or liability depends on which they fall.
So b wise wit ur choose of number of children u want to bring 2d world for gone r d days of God wil provide, and tak care of them.
Don't bring children 2d world to suffer for God wil hold u accountable for d poor choices of ur children. A word is enough 4d wise!
U have made a very good point frm d country's economy stand but have u tot of d effect it'll hv on ur daughter? Bein an anly child is not easy, she needs 2 hv a sibling she can interact with nd tell stuff at home. She'll get bored wit jst parents 2 interact with. Havin anoda child won't be so bad! Have a re-think. Wish u luck.
Lol @ u re on your own make me laugh, please your wife is right, I understand what u re saying. But @list try nd make it 2 female nd male child. One is not nice please @list a male child should be added ok? Thank u, may God bless your family with his riches Amen.
The issue is that u don't know the value of children. U see them as a burden not a blessing. It's ok to consider the financial implication but ur wife must ve a say cos she is also deeply involved. U both need to understand marriage and children ur both reasons are quit funny. Take it to God cos it's him that supplies all that every child need.having another baby could take u to a higher financial level if u have a chat with God.
I think your wife should be very grateful for this,but sir pls let her have just one more,if that will make her happy,there is no point having many children when u know u won't be qble to give them all they news,and I tell u having kids is very expensive, if u want the best for them,i have two already and I'm OK with it,though lot of pressure from ppl to have more fell on my deaf ear,even hubby wants more but I no gree
Lol @ u re on your own make me laugh, please your wife is right, I understand what u re saying. But @list try nd make it 2 female nd male child. One is not nice please @list a male child should be added ok? Thank u, may God bless your family with his riches Amen.
Please your wife is right, I understand what u re saying. But @list try nd make it 2 female nd male child. One is not nice please @list a male child should be added ok? Thank u, may God bless your family with his riches Amen.
Try talking to her calmly. Pray about it. You both have a say in the number of children you want. You have valid points but just try and reach a solution where you are both happy.
How I wish ma mother can sit you down and advise you...even mesef sumtymz dislike d fact dt I av no siblings#bt wt ma younger counsins- I still rule deir world as a big sis *winks*
I don't mind turning my future wife 2 a baby factory as long as i can comfortably take very good care of em all. "Go ye into the World and (mass) produce forth life". So says the Good old Book.
Two won't hurt now.. besides what if God forbids that, but something bad happens to that "one child".. what are you going to do? You men have time but women don't.. we have to give birth while we are still fertile.. if u need her to work to support the family.. tell her
Dear man, I think the both of you should have a say as marriage isn't for one person to decide. I think you should also be flexible. Though the economy isn't smiling but 2 kids is just perfect. Pls have a rethink and the fact that she's not working shouldn't be your excuse. Trust me , if you capitalise on that, she'll take a job all because she wants another child. When a woman wants it she gets it.
you have a pout BUT ........you guys should have discussed this before marriage.......also, maybe your wife should consider working (part-time) at least. if she agrees to work, i guess you can have 1 more child.
Oga, you can say this because you did not sweat to get your first child. Its quite clear that you did not discuss the number of children you both were going to have before marriage. Another thing is that, God would have revealed the number of children you were going to have to your wife. Why dont you both go to God in prayers, He will speak to you. If God says a couple will have 10 children, He will provide ALL that is required to raise the 10 kids. He is an ALL sufficient God.
Oga sir... these are d tins u talk abt during courtship... U should be happy that she is talking to you and not just taking matter into her own hands. and pls for the record, just because she doesn't work doesn't mean she can't have a say in the marriage.. u guys should sit down and talk about dis.. and find a way arnd it.
I feel you male reader, my case is the reverse, i. Wanted 3kids before marriage but after my first child a boy, i feel content. I don't want anymore. But my husband had been hinting for more kids. I just dont feel like having more, my pregnancy n childbirth was even easy compared to most people. Be honest with your wife finance is not truly the nissue not to have just 2kids. If she stays at home and takes care of them properly, they won't fall Ill frequently less medical bills n no nanny expenses. There are so many waysof cutting costs if you want another child. Your wife may want a son to feel more secure. And think of your little daughter, she may feel lonely growing up. Most only kids usually have behavioural issues. Its for this reasons n alot more that i'll lgive in to my husband's wishes n have1 more child by Gods grace. At the end of the day it is God that gives children n be happy that your wife can bear kids. You don't wanna experience barrenness at al. you made even love this new baby more. And if she tricks you into getting her pregnant, forgive her
Is it not better to give one child the best life possible, than to have several and be waiting for others to take care of them for you? God has given us brains to think, he will not come down and take care of your children for you. Later when your child is sick and the doctor refuses to operate because you cannot pay, you will say he is wicked. How about you apply sense? Children are not possessions, they are responsibilities!
Only the poster knows his capability and if he thinks he can provide for only one child- great! the wife is the selfish one, so she will just sit at home and make demands. If you want more children, you need to go and get a job! Education is not cheap oh!
When it comes to family and having children. Both the husband and the wife will have to agree before even getting married. We had the names of our babies before marriage. If its about the economy, let her start doing something.
You are ibo and very very stupid....that the man wants quality over quantity is now bad...he has enough to raise one good kid n he is lazy.....am ibo too by the way!!
There should be mutual understanding but i reason this man is being selfish and probably has some children out of wedlock. Look man the earlier you make ur wife understand u have some other responsibility elsewhere the beta for the both of you.
There should be mutual understanding but i reason this man is being selfish and probably has some children out of wedlock. Look man the earlier you make ur wife understand u have some other responsibility elsewhere the beta for the both of you.
Show Madam what dirty purse? You women really exaggerate yourselves. Why should he show her his purse? I don't blame you. I blame the moron that brought such a simple issue that needs a simple answer. World over, he that pays the piper dictates the tone. How did men become so weak, abeg? And you madam "feminist", get off your inferiority complex and face the fact that God created the man to be the head of the home. It is women like you that find it difficult to get married or never stay married.
May God bless women like you that haven't allowed the madness of "feminism" to creep into their brain. God bless you for acknowledging that the man should have the final say since he is the head of the home. We dey find women like you to marry.
I am in support of the dude Jare, what is even the point of having 3 more more kids after all a child is a child, you think all those agbero robbing in the traffic were not product of many children. I also plan to have just one be it a gurl or boy. Truth be told, I don't like crowd and would not want a battalion house, that way the best of everything is what we all will enjoy.
U are a pitiful human being with warped views. Good luck to you. The man wants to cut his coat according to his size and U're there judging. It's not your fault. Your own GOD will judge you and your small brain
Anonymous you where so quick to respond to her comment that you didn't realise you're both saying the samething. Well except for 'the purse' thing. Hmm...
Dnt allow ur wife or anybody to drag u 2 ur early grace or make u do wat u Dnt want 2 do, he who wears d shoe knwz were is paining him. Dnt mind anybody stand ur ground, if u say 1, 1 it is.
140 comments:
Marriage is a "2 way thing"!
Please do work it out within yourselves. It takes great understanding and compromise. Have a great week.
Linda not all men are dogs pls!!!
That "Linda take note" stupid commenter needs to be stoned honestly..she is as annoying as fuck..ugly bitch!!!
your wife maybe right on you cos a real man who believed in GOD will never be afraid of tomorrow or you dont have any good plans for your tomorrow?or do you married a white woman?
Correct economy is not smiling,thats how both of you should reason .Its not about bearing children,Its about rearing then we'll also
Oga, you are a very lazy poor man.
So, you can't provide for at least 3 children.
You should have stayed single since you are 2 lazy and 2 wretched to have just 3 children.
Poverty is a deadly disease.
See as it have turned this poster to a mad man.
Poster, you are a yoruba.
You people are very shameless and lazy.
Please, do whatever makes you sleep well at night and leave us alone.
Poster, you are a yoruba.
You people are very senseless, shameless and lazy.
Please, do whatever makes you sleep well at night and leave us alone.
Are you asking Linda Ikeji....I she the one that ask you to marry?
God is always the provider,having one more won't hinder you
From taking care of the family.its well.
Oga na wa for you ooo...are you that broke to the extend that you can't cater for 4 children at least...it's good to always put the economy and income into consideration whenever having kids..always believe that God will provide for your family
Oga na wa for you ooo...are you that broke to the extend that you can't cater for 4 children at least...it's good to always put the economy and income into consideration whenever having kids..always believe that God will provide for your family
I am a woman...a feminist for that matter. This man is WISE. Do not have more children than you can afford. It is not easy at all for anyone out here these days. Oga, it is up to both of you how many children you should have not just you (that is selfish) but please show madam your purse. Let her see what goes in and comes out so she can understand that there is no left over money for child #2.
Isn't this to early Linda,
Well as a Sanetor, I will go with the Bible 'Genesis 22:17, Genesis 9:7:- And you, be ye fruitful, and multiply; bring forth abundantly in the earth, and multiply therein.' and many more versed supporting my Pastoral Vision.
for only God watches over a child or even if there are a thousand children, only God watches after them not their parents
But I totally agree with you Brotherly, we must multiply with caution, with with massive growth in population, it is necessary to cut your coat to your size.
Oga bikonu make it two
Doesn't makes sense to me
Waoh, something that should have been discussed and agreed before marriage. Very important! But since you are married you can wait a few years. Maybe two kids you need to compromise and she can also decide to start something doing, so that she too can contribute financially to the home. Also in these times, It's better she is working too what if something happens to you and you can't provide enough for the family again?
she just wants the D... lol.. but on a more serious note, i think u should listen to her and make another baby if u can, if u're not ready now that's fine but i think i agree with her, u gotta have another child...
One more is okay.
Sit her down and make her understand your reasons, you both must understand each other, that's is why ur are couple huh.
it is good to have a second child at least your daughter can have a brother or sister. but i really support you to resist such pressure from your wife to keep having children anyhow, as most women will mount pressure on their husband to have children, then later blame for failing to take care of them.
Gbam
I SUPPORT THIS GUY.
"Honestly I feel that the one who provides for the family should decide the number of kids "......WOW! That is the most selfish, degrading, insulting statement I've heard in a long time. You better cut off your egg plant then.
U ve a point, but consider second child as soon as ur income or earning improves. No point bringing dem to d world to suffer. Engage her more, she will see reasons with u. Ppl actually celebrate den turn dia back on u only to resurface wen he or she is made in life. #myopinion#
Guy tell her to park well and she should go look for a job first.
Mr. Man please wake up from that sleep of yours or don't you know that he who has a child owes death a big debt? Some thing like dis happens in my area to a family that has a child. The husband refused to have more children but the wife kept on persisting they should have more but unfortunately, the husband has refused allowing his wife to take in for another child. One faithful day, their only child was on his way back from school when suddenly an okada (bike) from no where slammed their child into a gutter and he died on the spot. So oga boss, you better wake up and begin to make babes otherwise u go regret am later oh. Person way get 1 pikin owe death dept oh go and ask to know more.
A girl is a great and precious gift from God, but pls if u have the oppo of having another, please do . So sge can hav a playmate, nigerian men r fascinated by male children
Judeejekam@yahoo.com
Am 100% behind u. Pls stick to ur decision till u re convinced and ready to av another baby . after all u re the head of the family and u av the final say . the bible said whoever that doesn't provide for his family is worse than an infidel. Martins Yemi Ibiloyè signing out.
Gracia
Tell your wife there are people who lost all four children at once so that logic of having more kids incase something happens to one is wrong. And you are right, nobody would help take care of them kids for you (my mum had to fend for four kids when we lost my dad), all people want to do is eat naming rice. Whatever happens afterwards is your cup of tea. Goodluck
I tthiink that decision belongss to tthe both of u and not just u!
You really sound selfish
Onye puta o koo nke ya! Linda Ikeji blog readers Kwenu!
Mr Man, you are dead wrong. Decision on the number of kids to have should be made between you and your wife. You guys should reach a compromise. I don't think there is any woman out there who wants just one child. You guys can talk about the economy and decide if it's okay for her to get a job so as to have 2 incomes. Don't just shut it down. Hope you know she has the gun here, she knows her ovulation period and can go ahead and get pregnant by you without your permission. She's not going to beg you for long. You will come along after the baby is born. Bye.
Oga boss. I feel ur pain. For ur wifey, I feel Shld be patient with time she wld b preggy again when the economy balances
Ur comment will be visible after...
Share same philosophy with you but haba! One is small nah, abeg make it 2 or 3.
Guy u have a point buh try mk dem 2 ok,besides u ar an African Man
One child is okay especially in this harsh economy.. But women with just female children always want a male child to balance it cos of insecurity so if she wants another child, please give it to her so that peace can reign.. Case closed#
Pls try nd make two so dat ur daughter will have somebody to stay with when both of u will not be around in future. Two is jst ok
This is true,really.Times have changed.
If you desire to give yourself & your family,quality life.You must plan.Limit the 'birthing' like rabbits.
Discuss with your wife na. Dis one no be issue
Ride on bro. It should be your call.
pls try and hae a second child even though i agree with u abt the economy situation but all in all it is good to hae kids because they are the future of tomorrow and our joy
truth...
truth
truth talk
You both have a say in this MR....
i understand your situation. But did you discuss this with your wife before marriage? It is a big risk to have just one child, and you should also understand your wife's situation also. You are a man, and you can have kids at any time. Your wife's clock for bearing kids will soon be over. To make it an agreeable situation, please do a vasectomy, so if anything happens to your only child, you will not go outside to have a child....GBAM.
But honestly two won't be a bad idea
Your daughter needs a friend
Talk with ur dear love on mutual respect. put more insight of ur decision in her. display tolerant and show her that u also understood her pains, but if one child is all you want base on whatever ur reason may be, JUST LOCK UP:
Yes u re a selfish man!! How can just one child bcome a problem. How difficult wil it b to train 2kids. If u can train one,what makes u think God won't help u wen u av another. The child might even be a blessing to the family. Use ur head oh
Hmmmmm, dis is a real though one but if ur wife is not working coz u told her not too then please sir u will have to grant her dis request coz u were the one that told her not to work BT if its DAT she didn't just get a job due to d lack of employment in d country pls try to explain to her very well.
You are a very wicked man! Don't you want your daughter to have a sibling at least..
Ur opinion is reasonable, av d num of kids u kno u can giv quality lyf to.
For an African this is quite remarkable; for lack of better word. It is rarely to find a man content with just one child and a female at that especially regarding lineage and all that sh*t! Anyway I say kudos to you, but know if your wife wants a kid, she would get it with or without your consent, as long as you have sex with her.
U ar very right but in future when u ar now ready for kids u might not see. It is bera to av it now
This serious
You should expend more energy on increasing your income, not claiming rights here. How much does it's take to add another child to the family? You sound like a very lazy man!
May God direct you my brother
Try to make one more oga
Una 4 talk dis one den plan n agree about am b4 una marry na.
Seriously? Give her d second child n dat shld b a full stop
You both have a say and should learn to compromise. Let her have a second baby and later start work. Just because you are the one providing for the family does not mean you get to decide 1 is final.
It's has to be a collective agreement between the two of you. Linda take note!
Which one is one child? Abegi. @ least 2 nw. Even if na onyibo
What does she know? She has no foresight, please one is okay for you.
Do as u wish
i think you are a gay, how can you just want only one kid? an african man? nawaoo and you are very selfish maybe you have kids somewhere else
Ndo o!
listen to your wife. ur daughter deserves at least a brother or a sis. a companion!
Oga, consider her and have one more....
She better listen to you...the economy isn't smiling
Y nt make ur wife an asset instead of a liability so dat she can be assistin u.
Of cos you made sense... but please make it two so that your daughter can have company. The love of a brother/sister is the sweetest... honestly!
It's not only your decision to make about having children, it involves the both of you. You should have told her this before marriage.
But I think you should listen to her because it's not easy being an only child, consider your daughter being alone and see all her friends happy with their siblings, am talking from experience, we're two and I still wish I had more siblings. it's very sad and lonely, consider your daughter and wife, don't be selfish.
Which economy ? So u mean u can't take care of 2 kids ? Guy wake up
She also has a say u know.
The only way u can have one child is to go get a snip. If u leave it up to ur wife, na OYO u de face. I blame ur wife sef that knows the kind of husband she has and still went ahead to take permission. What ever happened to just getting pregnant and telling you the good news. Mr one child.
This is so rare though, I wish I had such a husband... saves my puna from alot of stress. Lol
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U have a point there, but u should also consider her too, I dunno what ur earnings are but if u think another kid will be a burden then u should dialogue some more wit ur wife, explain to her and tell her to hang on until things improve financially
Am a woman and I know am stubborn and I react when I don't get what I want. You on d other hand have a right to ur opinion but try considering her and this is one of the reasons people need to discuss about kids with their partner before getting married
IT SHUD BE AN AGREEMNT BETWN U TWO BEFORE NOW....TOMJERRYSWIT
True talk for u said it all mostly d part "Economy is not smiling". I do say dis over, and over again, u don't tak children to d grave, and they r either asset or liability depends on which they fall.
So b wise wit ur choose of number of children u want to bring 2d world for gone r d days of God wil provide, and tak care of them.
Don't bring children 2d world to suffer for God wil hold u accountable for d poor choices of ur children. A word is enough 4d wise!
True talk for u said it all mostly d part "Economy is not smiling". I do say dis over, and over again, u don't tak children to d grave, and they r either asset or liability depends on which they fall.
So b wise wit ur choose of number of children u want to bring 2d world for gone r d days of God wil provide, and tak care of them.
Don't bring children 2d world to suffer for God wil hold u accountable for d poor choices of ur children. A word is enough 4d wise!
True talk for u said it all mostly d part "Economy is not smiling". I do say dis over, and over again, u don't tak children to d grave, and they r either asset or liability depends on which they fall.
So b wise wit ur choose of number of children u want to bring 2d world for gone r d days of God wil provide, and tak care of them.
Don't bring children 2d world to suffer for God wil hold u accountable for d poor choices of ur children. A word is enough 4d wise!
U have made a very good point frm d country's economy stand but have u tot of d effect it'll hv on ur daughter? Bein an anly child is not easy, she needs 2 hv a sibling she can interact with nd tell stuff at home. She'll get bored wit jst parents 2 interact with. Havin anoda child won't be so bad! Have a re-think. Wish u luck.
Doesn't sound Nigerian.
Lol @ u re on your own make me laugh, please your wife is right, I understand what u re saying. But @list try nd make it 2 female nd male child. One is not nice please @list a male child should be added ok? Thank u, may God bless your family with his riches Amen.
The issue is that u don't know the value of children. U see them as a burden not a blessing. It's ok to consider the financial implication but ur wife must ve a say cos she is also deeply involved. U both need to understand marriage and children ur both reasons are quit funny. Take it to God cos it's him that supplies all that every child need.having another baby could take u to a higher financial level if u have a chat with God.
I think your wife should be very grateful for this,but sir pls let her have just one more,if that will make her happy,there is no point having many children when u know u won't be qble to give them all they news,and I tell u having kids is very expensive, if u want the best for them,i have two already and I'm OK with it,though lot of pressure from ppl to have more fell on my deaf ear,even hubby wants more but I no gree
Lol @ u re on your own make me laugh, please your wife is right, I understand what u re saying. But @list try nd make it 2 female nd male child. One is not nice please @list a male child should be added ok? Thank u, may God bless your family with his riches Amen.
Please your wife is right, I understand what u re saying. But @list try nd make it 2 female nd male child. One is not nice please @list a male child should be added ok? Thank u, may God bless your family with his riches Amen.
Tell her in 5years you will have another one. Don't fall for the pressure. Having Kids you can't afford makes no sense.
That's life
Try talking to her calmly. Pray about it. You both have a say in the number of children you want. You have valid points but just try and reach a solution where you are both happy.
This is exactly my Story. We have a son and my husband doesn't want more Kids Since he is the Sole Provider.
God forbid. I will steal his sperm and go and do IUI
One more won't kill ya...or will it? You two need a therapist\marriage counselling.
One more won't kill ya...or will it? You two need a therapist\marriage counselling.
I agree on the person that is taking care of the family should decide nos of kids....nevertheless one kid is no no,at least 2 kids
I agree wt u bros on d issue of economy. bt y nt mk it two? dnt u wnt a male child?
How I wish ma mother can sit you down and advise you...even mesef sumtymz dislike d fact dt I av no siblings#bt wt ma younger counsins- I still rule deir world as a big sis *winks*
YES U ARE A SELFISH MAN....MSTEWWW
I believe u d man.. Stand on ur words.. #Word#
I don't mind turning my future wife 2 a baby factory as long as i can comfortably take very good care of em all.
"Go ye into the World and (mass) produce forth life". So says the Good old Book.
Haba guy make it two. God will provide for you and family.
Two won't hurt now.. besides what if God forbids that, but something bad happens to that "one child".. what are you going to do? You men have time but women don't.. we have to give birth while we are still fertile.. if u need her to work to support the family.. tell her
Hvin one isn't dt good thou........
Your wife is right...
OKORO UPGRADED**
Oga u had beta av 2 to be on d safe side.truly wat if smtin hapens to d child den u are "DONE" 2 is a beta numba
One child ke
Give d woman belly jera. Be4 u die, ur family members go come carry ur property
Dear man, I think the both of you should have a say as marriage isn't for one person to decide. I think you should also be flexible. Though the economy isn't smiling but 2 kids is just perfect. Pls have a rethink and the fact that she's not working shouldn't be your excuse. Trust me , if you capitalise on that, she'll take a job all because she wants another child. When a woman wants it she gets it.
you have a pout BUT ........you guys should have discussed this before marriage.......also, maybe your wife should consider working (part-time) at least. if she agrees to work, i guess you can have 1 more child.
Oga, you can say this because you did not sweat to get your first child. Its quite clear that you did not discuss the number of children you both were going to have before marriage. Another thing is that, God would have revealed the number of children you were going to have to your wife. Why dont you both go to God in prayers, He will speak to you. If God says a couple will have 10 children, He will provide ALL that is required to raise the 10 kids. He is an ALL sufficient God.
Oga sir... these are d tins u talk abt during courtship... U should be happy that she is talking to you and not just taking matter into her own hands. and pls for the record, just because she doesn't work doesn't mean she can't have a say in the marriage.. u guys should sit down and talk about dis.. and find a way arnd it.
I think you can have one more,and if one turn to twins......LOL
I feel you male reader, my case is the reverse, i. Wanted 3kids before marriage but after my first child a boy, i feel content. I don't want anymore. But my husband had been hinting for more kids. I just dont feel like having more, my pregnancy n childbirth was even easy compared to most people.
Be honest with your wife finance is not truly the nissue not to have just 2kids. If she stays at home and takes care of them properly, they won't fall Ill frequently less medical bills n no nanny expenses. There are so many waysof cutting costs if you want another child. Your wife may want a son to feel more secure. And think of your little daughter, she may feel lonely growing up. Most only kids usually have behavioural issues.
Its for this reasons n alot more that i'll lgive in to my husband's wishes n have1 more child by Gods grace. At the end of the day it is God that gives children n be happy that your wife can bear kids. You don't wanna experience barrenness at al.
you made even love this new baby more. And if she tricks you into getting her pregnant, forgive her
Is it not better to give one child the best life possible, than to have several and be waiting for others to take care of them for you? God has given us brains to think, he will not come down and take care of your children for you. Later when your child is sick and the doctor refuses to operate because you cannot pay, you will say he is wicked. How about you apply sense? Children are not possessions, they are responsibilities!
Only the poster knows his capability and if he thinks he can provide for only one child- great! the wife is the selfish one, so she will just sit at home and make demands. If you want more children, you need to go and get a job! Education is not cheap oh!
When it comes to family and having children. Both the husband and the wife will have to agree before even getting married. We had the names of our babies before marriage. If its about the economy, let her start doing something.
Oooooooooh my...!
Economy situation? Still two kids isn't much.
You're too foolish for my liking.
No sense in what you said at all, plus the bad english.
I pity your parents.
She definitely has to have a say, she is your wife after all. You should be ready to make compromises.
It depend on the number of children one can cater for .
You are ibo and very very stupid....that the man wants quality over quantity is now bad...he has enough to raise one good kid n he is lazy.....am ibo too by the way!!
There should be mutual understanding but i reason this man is being selfish and probably has some children out of wedlock. Look man the earlier you make ur wife understand u have some other responsibility elsewhere the beta for the both of you.
There should be mutual understanding but i reason this man is being selfish and probably has some children out of wedlock. Look man the earlier you make ur wife understand u have some other responsibility elsewhere the beta for the both of you.
U re very stupid and senseless for asking this stupid question. U better grow up . broke ass
Show Madam what dirty purse? You women really exaggerate yourselves. Why should he show her his purse? I don't blame you. I blame the moron that brought such a simple issue that needs a simple answer. World over, he that pays the piper dictates the tone. How did men become so weak, abeg? And you madam "feminist", get off your inferiority complex and face the fact that God created the man to be the head of the home. It is women like you that find it difficult to get married or never stay married.
May God bless women like you that haven't allowed the madness of "feminism" to creep into their brain. God bless you for acknowledging that the man should have the final say since he is the head of the home. We dey find women like you to marry.
I agree with d poster 2 or 3 marriage is not all about children for me 2 is ok
I am in support of the dude Jare, what is even the point of having 3 more more kids after all a child is a child, you think all those agbero robbing in the traffic were not product of many children. I also plan to have just one be it a gurl or boy. Truth be told, I don't like crowd and would not want a battalion house, that way the best of everything is what we all will enjoy.
U are a pitiful human being with warped views. Good luck to you. The man wants to cut his coat according to his size and U're there judging. It's not your fault. Your own GOD will judge you and your small brain
Wretched soul makin wretched comments. Good luck to U
Anonymous you where so quick to respond to her comment that you didn't realise you're both saying the samething. Well except for 'the purse' thing. Hmm...
Dnt allow ur wife or anybody to drag u 2 ur early grace or make u do wat u Dnt want 2 do, he who wears d shoe knwz were is paining him. Dnt mind anybody stand ur ground, if u say 1, 1 it is.
Pls let her have one more, money will come.
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