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Friday 6 May 2016

Edible Catering!

Her third dress ripped. “Urgh!” Benita sighed. These online malls had a habit of delivering Mr Ibu when one ordered for RMD. She had told the communications executive that size 8 was what she wanted! Size 8! Never mind that she stopped being a size 8 the week Domino pizza moved to her street.

Her husband was coming home after six months of fighting Boko Haram in Sambisa forest and she needed to look her best. Knowing her husband, he would head straight for the cobwebs down there before noticing she had put on a little weight. Okay, not so little.
With the rate at which marriages crashed these days, and the lack of agile men versed in Bed-o-logy, there was no way she was letting Desmond visit “Edible Catering”, by any fault of hers.  She was more than edible enough. What was she to do with all these ripped dresses though? She would call Beatrice.
“Babe, how far? Are you dolled up yet?” Benita asked her friend on the other end of the line.
“Dolled up? No oh. Raymond would rip my dress. I had my bath and placed some bananas and pear in strategic places. I’m sprawled on the dining table as we speak!” Beatrice laughed.
“Ah, Beatrice!”
“Ah what? You ought to join me” her friend giggled.
“There is a problem. I can’t be naked. All those bottles of small stout and pizza have conspired against me. I bought three gowns but none fit.”
“I warned you though. I warned you to start taking Slimtea with me! You can see the difference between your struggle and my own abi?”   
“I know, I know. I’m ordering Slimtea tomorrow. But I’ll go nude and tell you how it goes later. Best of luck with your husband!”
Benita cut the call, stripped to her birthday suit, brought out her heels and stood arms akimbo in the middle of the room, with a smile on her face.
Desmond walked in with a grin and saw his wife in all her naked glory.
He dropped his army knap sack on the floor “Ah. Who is responsible for your pregnancy?”




Slimtea is a natural blend of fresh weight loss ingredients, guaranteed to boost your metabolism for weight loss,  Slimtea is the only weight loss tea designed to detox your system, fight tummy fat, & cleanse your body, all at once!
Slimtea is affordable and available for purchase! Nationwide payment on delivery options available too! Visit our website www.slimtea.com.ng or contact the following to make enquiries and place your orders; 
CALL/WHATSAPP: 08189488738, 09083337537, 09083340376, 09083231736, 08181433219, 09080442390

45 comments:

Unknown said...

Ok

Unknown said...

Nice



#FINEST

BONARIO NNAGS said...

Lol love the advert,the caption caught my attention and I'm glad I read the story till the point I saw Tuface Idibia's wife.


. ~BONARIO~says so via NOKIA LUMIA

Unknown said...

Lol...nice one!

Anonymous said...

Slim tea u need to be ashamed of yourselves for this.

awoofnaija.com said...

It's 'Edible Catering' Linda Sweetheart...

Nice caption by the way. Makes me remember the events of past days. Lol.

awoofnaija.com - Nigeria's First Freebies Portal.

Unknown said...

Mtchewwww.

KEY-POINT said...

NA WAITIN B DIS I BEG

Unknown said...

Nice add,but does dis tea only apply to women alone,dia re men who got weight problems too na

Lord Busayo said...

Aunty Linda can't even spell 'Catering' very well.

Unknown said...

.decitoN

NaijaDeltaBabe said...

D heading of d post tho


...merited happiness

Unknown said...

hmmm....

Unknown said...

Hahaha haha, lol. Who got you pregnant, oh my.

Anonymous said...

Lol this is d first time I'll be opening their advert. D edible catering thing sure is a good strategy lol. Whose responsible for your pregnancy? WHAT ??? Lol

Unknown said...

Hian!!! Nice advert. Lol@ who's responsible for your pregnancy??



Sincerely speaking the mind of Amadioha

Unknown said...

Ok nice

Anonymous said...

annie idibia u dont have shame....u are using edible catering as a joke against tiwa upon your husband was among those knacking her akpako and u even contributed to the fall of the marriage by cooking for that tbillz abi u were interested in him them...nonsense!!1









Anonymous said...

annie go and sit down jare.....why use that word edible catering. u want to hunt tiwa shebi...u and ur philanddering husband contributed to the fall of tiwas marriage.












Anonymous said...

annie go and sit down jare.....why use that word edible catering. u want to hunt tiwa shebi...u and ur philanddering husband contributed to the fall of tiwas marriage.














Anonymous said...

annie go and sit down jare.....why use that word edible catering. u want to hunt tiwa shebi...u and ur philanddering husband contributed to the fall of tiwas marriage.
















fabyorubachic said...

The big mistake they made is using Annie that has never been fat a day in her life as their model. Their shit obviously doesn't work . Rather that wasting money to pay a woman that shared trowback pics of her self that proves that she's only probably ever gained 20 pounds through her pregnancies use someone who actually battles with weight loss and let us see the miracle happen I guarantee slim tea will sell like hot cakes #justsaying

folashade said...

shuo.....annie who send u go market for tiwa head..... u done use ur cooking spoil her marriage and your husband f*k am join. u are now coming to bring up edible wetin... your own would soon reach



folashade said...

shuo.....annie who send u go market for tiwa head..... u done use ur cooking spoil her marriage and your husband f*k am join. u are now coming to bring up edible wetin... your own would soon reach





folashade said...

shuo.....annie who send u go market for tiwa head..... u done use ur cooking spoil her marriage and your husband f*k am join. u are now coming to bring up edible wetin... your own would soon reach






Unknown said...

That pix thou is something else

asaiah said...

dont mind the nonsense woman. annie u dont have any right to use that caption. tiwa savage is still recovering from her marriage. according to peoples comments u participated in tearing her home.are you her frenemyy?

asaiah said...

dont mind the nonsense woman. annie u dont have any right to use that caption. tiwa savage is still recovering from her marriage. according to peoples comments u participated in tearing her home.are you her frenemyy?

Unknown said...

Lol, Market strategies! I enjoyed the story until I got to Who is responsible for ur pregnancy? Oh boyy Ehh, a case of when the bush meat catch the hunter

OMG!WOMAN said...

Lol

Ladies Visit www.myomgwoman.blogspot.com for some goodies

Unknown said...

Nice advert but slim tea should watch it, they are putting other brands in a bad light.

Unknown said...

lol

Unknown said...

Mcheeeeeeeew! Linda take note!

Anonymous said...

Well well, Annie has actually dated Teebillz b4. During the days of Saucekid.. I mean when teebillz was managing sauce. They used to all hangout at Dideolu court. N since they r now neighbors, anyting cud have happened.

Anonymous said...

Cool strategy using 'edible catering'. I have two problems with this post.

1) why are you putting Mr Ibu in a bad light? That's uncalled for. It's not humor. It's insolence.

2) Dominos pizza can sue you for the discredit you just did to their brand. You just told the general populace that if they don't want to soooo fat and unattractive, they should eat their pizza.

Not the wisest of posts.

Jenny said...

Why are all these slim tea ads always urging women to be slim so their husbands don't leave or cheat on them? Why can't women be fit for their own benefit? Why must it always be attached to pleasing a man? Please lose weight for your own personal happiness, not for some husband who might not even notice at the end of the day.

Unknown said...

hahahaa
-D great anonymous now as Vivian Reginalds

Anonymous said...

Lol. My sister works for their company. I'm sure she's the one that wrote this. I would know her work anywhere. Her name is Mystique-Syn Osuchukwu by the way. *Sisterly love*

Anonymous said...

Lol. My sister works for their company. I'm sure she's the one that wrote this. I would know her work anywhere. *sisterly love* Her name is Mystique-Syn Osuchukwu!

Unknown said...

If this product is that good why make so much effort advertising it. Eat healthy and workout people!

Anonymous said...

So we shuld fly becos ur sis wrote it. Biko shift

Yetty k said...

I love annies stature.i prefer d choice of annie than ini

Unknown said...

Ur sistr wrks for d company u wil kn her wrk any whr. Who asked u???

Unknown said...

U find it difficult to read english abi?... dee

Unknown said...

My thoughts exactly

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