Dear LIB readers: I was raped in school and now it's come back to haunt me | Welcome to Linda Ikeji's Blog

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Monday 15 September 2014

Dear LIB readers: I was raped in school and now it's come back to haunt me

From a female LIB reader
I'm in a big mess, and I don't know how to get out of this...here is my story. About Seven years ago, when I was still in the University, I did something very stupid and childish and I paid dearly for it, and right now its looks like the ghost of the past has come back to haunt me. 
I was in my 2nd year in school when I met Tosin (not real name) she was my Roomie that year and we became quite close. She was dating this cool guy who bought her so many things and took her to the coolest parties, despite our (the girls in the hostel room) plea to meet her boo, she refused, saying girls are not to be trusted. After about seven months of dating him, she entered the room this particular day crying...continue...
...telling us how she caught the guy with another girl. She cried for days, she was devastated. Then she came up with this ridiculous idea of setting the guy up and treating his f**k up. I was picked to be the bait, because I was the innocent and quiet one. I collected the guy's phone number and he fell for the sweet voice. That was how Jide and I started our relationship but it was a Revengetionship on my part. The deal was to make him fall for me and then I dump him. Jide was sweet to me, but I never allowed him to come see me in school, and once he found out that I was a virgin, oh he treated me like I was the rarest of all gems. After about four months of this charade, He found out the connection between Tosin and I, and to say he was angry is an understatement. He called me names and we went our separate ways. He was hurt and this was good news for Tosin.
Six months later, I met this wonderful guy, Frank. He was so smooth and jovial, he charmed me and we started dating. After about three months, on this particular day, I got a call from Frank, he told me he was not feeling fine that I should quickly come over. Like every young lady in love, I dashed down to his house, but to my surprise, I met Frank playing scrabbles with two of his friends, looking quite healthy. He told me he just wanted to see my face. I sat down and watched them play for some minutes, then the door bell rang, and to my utmost mortification, Jide strolled in. It was at that moment that I knew I was in deep mess. To cut it short, my virginity was taken in a brutal way. I was raped by Jide, Frank and their two friends, I was then warned never to breathe a word to the police about it or they will kill me. I went back to the hostel and Tosin was the only one who knew about it, she was my rock and anchor, and she kept apologizing for putting me in the mess. We finished school and everyone went their separate ways.
Ever since the incident, I was not interested in men or any relationship, I kept to myself, focused on my future, I got a Job with a Telecommunications company and all was well in my world. Then early last year, I met this amazing guy, who gave me a reason to love again. Oh he loves me, and I love him too. Three months ago, he proposed and I accepted. It was that time that I found out that he is Tosin's very close cousin, Since then, Tosin has been threatening to tell him about the rape, that I should leave his cousin alone. She said if I don't, she will tell my fiance's family. I was shocked. She was the reason I went through all that, and she is threatening to take the little happiness I just found away from me again. I'm confused, I'm angry, I'm sad. I don't want to lose my man. I accept that I was stupid back then but I've paid dearly for it. Should I be deprived of this too? Someone please help!

622 comments:

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Anonymous said...

You were raped, that was not your fault. Tell your boyfriend what happened.

Unknown said...

My advice for you is to sit the guy down and explain everything to him...if he freaks out, cutting his ties with you then he doesn't love you...let him go

Unknown said...

My advice for you is to sit the guy down and explain everything to him...if he freaks out, cutting his ties with you then he doesn't love you...let him go

Anonymous said...

Tell him by urself. Rape is not something to be ashamed of like prostitution. U didn't ask for it. It was taken forcefully. He will understand and even shun dat friend of urs. Except if there are other things that you are not telling us. Whatever d outcome, just move on with ur life if he refuse to stand by u. You will definitely meet a better person. Man no dey finish for market...it can only get better

Anonymous said...

critically unstable.....hmm, she shud 4get d guy nd wait fr anoda guy

omaahhonda said...

My dear,life is too short 2 b bordered,if she won tell dem mk she tell,cos if she doesn't he wiLl def kw,nottin is hidden under d sun,so jst tell him ur self,if he really loves u he will still marry,Ashewo dey marry good man na u no go marry ni? Abegiiiie

Anonymous said...

My DEAR ... Tell Your Fiance YOURSELF and take the power away from Tosin... If he loves you truly he will stay ....You were young and naive; fine! but that's all in the PAST....

Alexis said...

What kind of pointless story is this? Pls someone tell me what part she got raped, coz the title and the story don't match.

Unknown said...

Never for one second think that is the end of d world for you. You can still live a very happy life. I think you should inform d guy before he finds out from his wicked cousin. If he loves you truly,he will forgive u even though it will take time. If he leaves you,then be rest assured dt you will get the right man for you. As for your friend,try to forgive her because she's just being human. I wish you well

Anonymous said...

The girl should just tell the guy ahead

Unknown said...

My dear tosin which not her real simple means u still cover her up. Tell the dude it's been many years ago. Let ur boy friend decide to stay or to leave u where a virgin

Anonymous said...

If he really wants to marry you,he will no matter what Tosin tells him.

Madam E. said...

Tell your fiance of the rape case. Tell him everything so as to let go finally. if you really love him, you should tell him of your past experience/s; it's then left for him to decide if he's going on with marriage plans with you. Even if Tosin is not related to him and you hid it from him, Frank/one of the rapists may still be his relation/friend/colleague/business partner. It's a big-small world. All the best......Mrs.Eunce

Anonymous said...

do u plan not tellin him b4 gettin married..dt nt advisable..babe dont let her threaten u..u tell d guy dis story before tosin...if he decides to kip u...gud nd if nt, let go..u wil surely meet ur own...u shuld nt b a slave to ur past..b a boss to it joor...

Unknown said...

Hi dear,dn't let go of your man because of dt girl and wateva incident u had in the past, instead call your fiance,tell him everytin about your past,if both of u realy love each other and if he's meant for you,he'l stay by you,cos the truth is whether he leaves you or not,dt tosin girl will tell him, be the 1st to let him know,make up your mind to do it,i hope you act wisely.al d best dear.

Unknown said...

Once you have prayed to god cause. Everything. Do happen for a reason god. Knows the best for you so if the truly. Loves you. As he claimed he. Will not leave you rather than show you more love so you should be the one to tell him first that is after you have prayed

Anonymous said...

Tell your bfrnd yourself all the details including Tosin's part in the case. If he goes he was never ment to be yours.

fifi said...

Ifink u shud tel your man about it o nd hw u were close to her couzin.u dnt wan the truth coming from tosin cus ur fiance wil never trust or believe you if tosin shud be the one to tel him so ibelieve the sooner u tel ur man d better.ibelieve it's not ur fault dat u were raped nd if he's d man for u he wil accept ur flaws nd imperfection

Anonymous said...

Be the one Tell your guy the whole story first before and cousin and he will forgive you and love you more for telling him about your past and notifying of what you did for you friend

Be first to talk to you man and ensure you tell him when both of you are in good mode.

Unknown said...

Once you have prayed to god cause. Everything. Do happen for a reason god. Knows the best for you so if the truly. Loves you. As he claimed he. Will not leave you rather than show you more love so you should be the one to tell him first that is after you have prayed

Anonymous said...

I pity u girl.. Pls relocate if it is a must.... Topzyus

Anonymous said...

tell your boyfriend explain to him and if he really loves you he will forgive and overlook it.

Anonymous said...

I feel your pain.My advise is tell the guy your past before your friend tells him.If he cuts off the relationship after letting him into your past,so be it.

Anonymous said...

She's a fucked up bitch, make sure u marry him by all means possible. Wat nonsense!!

Anonymous said...

Tosin is a bitch actually! But the best thing to do is to tell your guy abt it...

Anonymous said...

The only thing you can do is tell the guy the whole truth about everything and leave the rest to God n him. If he truly loves you he will stick by u n if he doesn't then life goes on. I had a similar experience and I told my husband d truth. We r waxing srronger by d day.

Anonymous said...


Your past is behind you now my dear. Life is a risk, pray about it and go ahead and tell your man about it, before anyone does. if he truly loves you then he should be ready to love your past and your present. If he leaves let him go God will bring someone else. there are people who used to be prostitutes or act porn in the past but are married today and leaving great lives.

marriage is a very serious thing, so as I said earlier if his love in this instance cant cover multitude of sins then he is not ready.

I wish all the best and may the good Lord grant you favour and wisdom.

Anonymous said...

please tell ur fiancee the truth. u were raped ok u didnt commit a crime. so far healthwise u are okay i dont see d big deal in that. if he is a real man....he wil even console u. pls do that fast so that whenever d tosin girl talks, ur man wil stand by you and also giv that tosin d backseat which she deserves.

famonzo said...

Well'*** i'll advice u to tell the guy before tosin informs his family. If he can live with it then d guy is urs forever and if not U'll find d right man for u.... Butneverkeep it as a secret to ur man.

Unknown said...

Oh dear I really wanna slap and beat the hell out of the goat called Tosin. Arrrgggghhhhh.... Anyways my advice is to sit ur man down and tell him what happened and tell him the truth. U have done nothing wrong and thank God it wasn't a case of ur new found love bn related to frank,jide and co. So chill for God and life will rape them of their future

Anonymous said...

that ur friend is not a good friend.in order not to lose ur man,open up to him,tell him ur past.....and trust God.

Unknown said...

This na..double wahala o...

Anonymous said...

Babe,getting raped is not a crime neither is it a sin. Tell ur boo, he'll be upset u got urself into that hot mess but but he wont leave you. If he does then it wasn't meant to be.

Anonymous said...

FIRST TO COMMENT***(GURU)
BAD NEWS..

Honest Nigerian said...

I think you should tell him. He probably knows already. If you really do love him, you dont wanna keeps things from him.. especially this. Himself and Jide may (if they're not already) become friends. U dont wanna run into Jide at ur wedding reception. If he really loves u, he'll not only appreciate ur honesty, he'll love u more.

Anonymous said...

Babe,getting raped is not a crime neither is it a sin. Tell ur boo, he'll be upset u got urself into that hot mess but but he wont leave you. If he does then it wasn't meant to be.

Anonymous said...

Please give us Tosin's address and number let us beat her up and threaten her too. Please.

Unknown said...

Nawa o.. this na double wahala...

Anonymous said...

If U were really honest U would've told him when U guys got serious. Honesty is the best policy. Tosin might be a bitch but U need to step your game up

Miss Incredible said...

I'm sorry abt wat u went tru. But I feel u shd have told ur guy d minute u discovered he was related to Tosin. U don't keep tinz like dis after u find out Tosin is his family! My advice to u come clean to ur guy b4 Tosin does...and maybe just maybe..tinz can still work out fine. honesty always works!

Unknown said...

This na double wahala o...

SalmaLena said...

My sister better move on because if you eventually marry this dude, Tosin will give you hell, there are a million dudes out there, Tosin isn't appreciative but remember one good turn deserves another...my advice look for someone else

Anonymous said...

what are you afraid of? it was a rape right? as you said...kindly tell the guy the story before she does...its nothing to be ashamed of, you didnt ask to be raped.

Unknown said...

Oh dear i think you should face it yourself by telling your man what happened in past and if he is your man he will hold your hands to end, not that easy duo but just put up some courage girl.

Anonymous said...

Pls tell ur fiance abt d rape,4get abt d threat and tell him

Anonymous said...

If u sincerely love him and he loves you too, I think tou should let him know what happened in the past and if he can stay fine. If not, he is not yours.

Anonymous said...

I hate these stories. How can four guys rape a virgin girl?? Like why is the world so wicked, like tears are coming out from my eyes.. As long as those guys live, they will never amount to anything, there will die being useless. NOTHING and absolutely NOTHING can justify that type of behaviour

Unknown said...

just tell the guy by urself,. if he forgives u fine, if not just move on. it is safer if he hears it first from u.

Anonymous said...

The long and short of it is for you to free yourself and your mind and tell your fiancé the story. If he finds out by himself, it will be a bigger mess. Start as if it is another girl and finally tell him that it is you. I he truly loves you, he will marry you; we all make mistakes

Anonymous said...

To start with,your friend is not a good friend...you went through all that because of her and now she doesn't want you in her family..this is why we should be very careful in whatever we do today because of tomorrow...my lil advice to you is this;be the first to tell your man abt your ordeal.don't let him hear it from someone else..if he's the right one,he will accept you wholeheartedly and help you convince his family members if they get to knowabt it.good luck!

Anonymous said...

So sorry about what happened to you..my sincere advice..face your fear..tell your new found luv about you past..else it will keep hunting you..if he truly loves you...he will stick by you...i wish you all best...

Anonymous said...

tell yur fiancee abt it,let him find out frm yu instead of findin it out frm sum1 else.if he loves yu,he z matured nd reasonable he"ll undastnd nd b dissappointed in tosin..buh if reverse z d case,den he doesnt lov yu enough..pls dnt dwell in yur past.if yu fiancee brks d relationship bcos of dis,knw he z nt d 1 4 yu nd itz God's way of letting yu knw.evrytin happns 4 a reason..@4 Tosin,if yu eva gt 2 read dis,yu re a betrayer nd may God 4giv yu.......Tianh

Anonymous said...

Hello. If what you are saying is the truth tell it to your guy by your self.
If you are for one another it will surely come to past.if you are scared that you will lose him you will surely lose him by the time you get married to him. If you don't tell him the truth now. Any marriage that is base on lies,pretance will never end up well. If you want to be happy tell him the whole story how it started and how it ends. And don't do stupid favor again till death do path in life. What if it lead to your death your friend will keep silent, and the guys will run,if they are not cut by the law. If you want more advance this my number 0802454781. Pls dont call me late hours. Call me at God hours. God bless in Jesus name

Anonymous said...

Tell him everything yourself and if he really loves u, it will only make ur bond stronger. If not, move on with your life

Anonymous said...

Dumb story!, Ode tell ur guy dat u were rape and how his cousin was d one, if he loves u, he will be with u, deres notin to hide dat u shud feel bad for, xcept u were one of those kinda runs gurls dat did parole with the so called tosin

Anonymous said...

Dt ur friend is a devil . Pls be d first to tell ur man about it if he want he should go ahead & marry u if he did't leave to God, especially if d u friend is serious about telling him.

Temiajaks said...

very simple. the past is the past . .take her power away and tell your fiance the truth just as you have just told here. if the guy likes you he will stick around and you both will fight her and if he leaves, then it was not meant to be. Such an experience is not somthing you want to keep a secrete from you future life partner. if not his cousin what if you meet one of those guys in the future and they are his friends? what then? so please release yourself from your self imposed bondage and tell him all that happened and i wish you all the best. PS that your Tosin friend is a silly somebody i got that from the second paragraph of your story.

seun said...

D best tin for u is to explain everything to your fiance.

Anonymous said...

I feel so sad about wat apnd to u, u should tell ur fiance, if he leave u wait d lord will bring ur own husband

Anonymous said...

fuck your Tosin friend or what ever you call her name. Girl, get on you knees and pray. then, tell your guy all that happened (that is if you have told us the real story). if he is your man and he really loves you, he will look beyond your past and move on. you have to set urself free and be happy. and if he does not, move on to the next guy abeg. hope you do not av a viral disease or did abortion sha? cos am wondering why ur asshole friend will want to let the cat out of the bag. does she she not have secrets so u can blackmail her too? na the mistake wey u do be that ooo. am sure she aint married. she is jealous of you. be brave and do the right thing.

the only love doctor said...

My dear, you should have told him all about your past before accepting his proposal. Well, its not too late to tell him. If He still wants you after that fine, if he breaks up with you because of that learn from it and move on. Next relationship tell the guy everything about you.

Unknown said...

open up to him before that unfriendly friend does.If your man truly loves you,he won't dwell on the past.

SalmaLena said...

Or better still tell your boyfriend what happened, I hope his feelings towards you doesn't change. If it does pack your bags and baggages and leave.

GREEN said...

ITS NOT A BIG DEAL, IF HE IS UR MAN AND U REALLY LOVE HIM, TELL HIM ABOUT UR PAST AND EVERYTHING HE NEEDS TO KNOW ABOUT U. DONT HIDE ANYTHING FROM HIM. B4 UR FRIEND TOSIN TELLS HIM. IF HE LOVES U HE STAYS, IF NOT HE GOES. NOTING TO WORRY ABOUT.

nkiru4love@yahoo.com

Anonymous said...

FCUK her.
Tell your man.
Cut her off.
Witch

Unknown said...

It is better for you to leave him now before it is too late. If you eventually get marry to the guy,Tosin will not give you breathing space, he can even be demanding for sex and if you refuse there will be problem. Tell your guy the reason for leaving him, you can only continue the relationship if and only if he agrees. Those that put their trust in God will never be ashamed. I believe God will give you your own man very soon, just keep on trusting in HIM. All will be well with you.

Anonymous said...

Omg i have never commented on this blog before but today i must lol! What is wrong with you!! Tahh better go and tell ur bf the truth that ur friend is very wicked!!!!!! Its hard but the truth is better ull be fine :)

Anonymous said...

Jeez u did ntin wrg u r a victim of circumstance shes mnt 2 b happy u finally found love nt stat hating on u.u knw wt jst tel ur fiance explain 2 hm u did ntin wrg,u where nt selling ur body 4 mony.

Anonymous said...

Jeez u did ntin wrg u r a victim of circumstance shes mnt 2 b happy u finally found love nt stat hating on u.u knw wt jst tel ur fiance explain 2 hm u did ntin wrg,u where nt selling ur body 4 mony.

Unknown said...

Ummm..It's so pathetic to have allowed d devil to use U̶̲̥̅̊ in d first time,all d in d name of "revenge" on ur friend'd behalf,that was too absurd.Well,U̶̲̥̅̊ just have to leave d new guy U̶̲̥̅̊ are abt to marry ALONE as clamoured by his cousin who happens to be that ur then friend.Free urself and pray to ǤÕ̳͡D̶̲̥̅̊ for psychological strength...Buh U̶̲̥̅̊ might be lucky wt d guy provided he truly loves U̶̲̥̅̊,even after ur friend might have intimated to him abt what happened as per d rape which U̶̲̥̅̊ stupidly initiated...Goodluck anyway!!

Anonymous said...

Fink u should tell him ursev and sort tinz out instead of allowing Mr Jide tell him

Angie said...

Don't know what type of help you need from Libers.
My candid advice is this: If the guy loves you deeply, he won't have a problem with your past if YOU tell him abt it before Tosin does.

*My R1.50c comment*

Nwafor Chizzy said...

Jst open up 2 him,u were raped,its nt ur fault,he should b understandin enuf 2 put it behind him cos its past,afterall most guys even after knwin their women were once prostitutes stil marry dem

Anonymous said...

I feel sorry 4 u oo,tell ur fiancee b4 she does if he truely loves u he will 4give u cos love conquers all.grace b

Anonymous said...

call 911 for help

Odugbesan Sunday Adetayo said...

Please let me have you4 gmail address for my coment. Thanks

Anonymous said...

If ur story is true den tell ur guy abt it n wat Tosin is also trying to do if he loves u as u say he will never lev u. Dis is d period u will know if he really love u.amytip

Anonymous said...

Why don't u just go tell ur man the whole truth b4 Tosin goes to tell him her own version of the truth btw y hadnt u told him dis all d while.... Women! Y'all can die with a secret SMH.

Unknown said...

Dealing with Blackmail don't come cheap. Just tell your man all that it was and trust in your GOD.

Tell him it all came up cause you where black mail by tosin and see how he react to this. Simple.

mercy said...

come on, open up and tell ur man. he don't need to hear it from someone else. If he is the right man he will still stick around.

FERNANDEZ said...

what so ever u do to the least of ur brother thou will be done unto you.Gbam!

Anonymous said...

Hmmm. so pathetic, Give Tosin the go let her tell everyone in the world nemesis will catch up with her. but i will suggest you tell the guy your own side of the story if her truely love he will stay with no matter how bad ur past is.

Livvsreamblog said...

Karma

Pikin-na-Man said...

Baby girl, I think you should talk to him about it. Tell him all that transpired and even Tosin's involvement in the matter. If he truly loves you as claimed then he will understand...trust me it is not as complicated as sounds!

All the best....

Anonymous said...

It's very simple if u really love him pliz tel him nd if he leaves coz of d truth he probably neva loved you..hearing from his cousin will only make it worse.we all have a past.

Unknown said...

Tell your man what happened. If he's mature I'm sure he'll understand that its ur past. And that ur roomate is one bag of fool

Anonymous said...

My sister, b the 1st to tell ur story, do not allow ur former frnd to do that on urbehalf. Avoid her adding to ur stories. If the guy still loves u, he will stay. Note: Do not force urself to his hand to avoid being maltreated again

Unknown said...

Sit ur fiance down,and tell him everything,the same way uve told us.I believe u should be truthful and tell him the whole truth.cos if u don't she wud always hunt and threaten u with d whole thing.if your fiance can't take the truth den my dear ure better off being single.cos ure the victim here.

Anonymous said...

I think you should tell him about the rape before Tosin does so. And if he truly loves you, he'll stay.

Unknown said...

Dearie just tell ur man what happened and how it happened b4 he gets to hear it from sm1 else.....if he really loves you it won't be d end of dat relationship.

Okoro said...

Chai..
Well, I'd advice u tell ur fiance everything and how it all happened before someone else does. And if he truly wants a future with u, he could let go of the past.. I hope so!

Anonymous said...

What i will advise you is that, tell this your new boyfriend everything before Tosin does, else she will paint the story much worse than it already is and let your boyfriend know who started it, she's just jealous that you have found someone and also he's family, don't mind her, all i'll say is tell him first, explain that you don't want him hearing it from someone else that's why you are telling him first, i pray he forgives you and lets go, besides you were the victim and then you were still naive and young then, don't let Tosin blackmail you for what she caused, God be with you dear

Anonymous said...

Try n sumon courage 2 tell ur man by urself b4 Tosin do, if God wants u guys 2geda nobody can separate u bt if u allow ur friend 2 carry out her threat, den u wil be in a very big mess

Anonymous said...

you are the victim here. before tosin tells her cousin you should tell him about it. if he decides to leave so be it but it would do you a lot of good if he finds out from you. and pray also.

Unknown said...

Don't b scared let her go ahead and tell him it is not ur fault it is only a stupid person dat would leave u.u did nothing wrong if he leaves den he doesn't deserve you

tomisyn said...

Really saddening! I'm so short of words, I don't know what to say buh the truth is, your friend aint supposed to say such cos u went through everything for her sake and if she insists on telling ur fiance,let her do it,if he really loves you as claimed he'd stay and if not let him go or better still u tell him first b4 he finds our from her

Services Incorporated said...

The best thing you can do for yourself is to tell your man before tosin does and tell him tosin's intention. If he loves you he will understand but if he leaves you at least you will free yourself from that burden but that Tosin is wicked sha!

angela said...

Babe u re nt stupid..de only tin dat can save dat relationship is to tel him de truth bfo his cousin(tosin)do dat for u..if truly u love him..ave been in dat shoes bfo so I know wat its take bfore I was giving another chanced.is bkus she's jealous that y is acting dat way..wish u de best of luck!!!

Anonymous said...

This world is heartless at times. my Dear God will repay Tosin back in her own coins, i advise that you open up to your new love, though it seems hard. but tell him straight away, involve your pastor and his pastor in the discussion. the Good thing is that men can be determined if they want to. Someone scandalized by wife and was obtaining N200k from her every month until my wife opened up to me. i didnt even find it hard to let go and forgive her.

Unknown said...

If this is true, for God's sake go on n tell d guy urself. This was in d past n it really isn't ur fault that u were raped. If he's urs, he'll stay. Period!

Anonymous said...

I'll advise you to tell your fiancé about everything. Tell him the whole truth. Take care my dear.

Anonymous said...

My dear,the power of sin is secrecy. Tell your new guy exactly what happened back in school. If he truly loves you,he will go ahead with the marriage plan to your friends shame.

Anonymous said...

if u really love dis guy as u said then fight for it although it may not be easy

Anonymous said...

Please tell your boyfriend the truth. Was raped too, but different story line. Told my husband after he asked me to marry him and nothing changed.

Unknown said...

I think u shld go ahead and tel ur man abt it. It happened years back. I feel he'll understand; to he'll wit ur stupid roomie.

Anonymous said...

@ first call de guy in a cool place nd tell him wot happen and wot caused it but I hope u didn't lie to him dat u were a virgin before,if he truly loves u notin dey much dia,tosin should even go ahead and tell de whole world,1 tin I knw for sure dat if u didn't give him de impression at de first place say u be virgin,

Anonymous said...

Tell your fiancé what happened to you in school, if he truly loves you he will stay with you. Love doesn't have to be hardwork. If you guys have it, you have it!

Anna said...

Tell ur fiance about everything. He may call you stupid at first just as i"m doing. But for a him to propose to you that shows how much he feels about you.If he believes in you, then ur friend tosin can go hug transformer.

Unknown said...

I suggest you sit your man down and tell him this story before she does. that way he will not be surprised to hear it. if you guys are truly in love he will over look your past. the future is always brighter. cheers

Oby said...

Just tell ur guy ur story, truth is lighter when it comes from you. Tosin's blackmail would then sound like a cheap gossip to him when she tells him. Goodluck. Meanwhile Tosin is wicked!

Anonymous said...

Tell ur guy d whole truth.n get 2knw if he truly luvs u lyk u say cuz ifhe does he'll stnd by u tru thick n thin.say d truth n d truth shall set u free.its better he hears it 4rm u dn 4rm sm1 else cuz tat'll b mre het breaking.remember nothing is hidden under the sun.so say d truth n the truth shall set u free

Anonymous said...

Tell ur guy d truth bcos only dat wil set u free.

Anonymous said...

The solution is obvious. Tell him what happened before she does. If he stays it was meant to be. If he doesn't, take heart...

Eastner said...

You know what you can do?
Just tell your fiance the truth.
Do not allow yourself to be blackmailed by Tosin.

GENIATUS said...

the tosin is a wickit girl. tell your fiance yourself. ts better he knows now and walks away or he finds out later cos HE MUST DEFINITELY FIND OUT SOONER OR LATER. let him also know the kind of cousin he has in Tosin...a user.

But u self u know try, u were too naive and silly

chygal said...

Hey Gal, my candid advice for you if u are interested in the relationship is to open up and tell him the truth, it will hurt him, but if he is truely urs, he will stick with U. I Wish U all d best.

Anonymous said...

so sad pls tellhim abput it ur self, if he likes you he will he will stay by you. all the best

FIZZICHILLIO said...

Tell him first before she does but before you do, pray about it. If he understands and loves you enough, he will let it dwell in the past. If he doesn't, he will let you go. If there's a next relationship try not to hide it from your man or else you are gonna be labelled a trickster. Next time don't interfere in someone's relationship (whether current or old) no matter how close the person is to you. Finally a lot of people will abuse u here but don't sweat it, its Linda Ikeji's blog!!

#Fizz

Unknown said...

Please show my comment now!!!

Anonymous said...

Tell ur man. If he is urs, he will love u all the way. We all make mistakes. You should be open with him if u intend to spend the rest of ur life with him.ans most importantly pray abt it.God will make his heart receptive

Anonymous said...

Tell ur man. If he is urs, he will love u all the way. We all make mistakes. You should be open with him if u intend to spend the rest of ur life with him.ans most importantly pray abt it.God will make his heart receptive

Anonymous said...

Linda of all d stories u av ever pasted here..dis is d most captivating...Nigerian film!..my dear..sit ur husband down nd tel him ur story before he hears it outside..if he is urs..he will forgive nd love u anyways..a stitch in time saves more Dan nine oo...#nellietalking#

riyike said...

Wake up in d middle of d night, 12 midnight precisely and curse her... you are welcome!

Anonymous said...

tell him every thing that happened if he truely love u,he will marry u,as for Tosin she is an idiot! onyekababyface@gmail.com

Anonymous said...

Why not tell ur man first,i don't even see any wrong u have done....

Anonymous said...

Explain everything to him, if he loves u, he'll understand.n she wount be a bother anymore

Salma said...

Tell him the whole truth.If he loves you he'll stay with you. But let your story be told by you and no one else. If you chose not to talk and walk away, this horrible past experience will always haunt you as you will always be blackmailed.

Anonymous said...

Tosin set you up to be raped. How do we know what she proposed was not premadidated? Talk to a lawyer and file a suit against her for "whatever your lawyer advice's you to do". Tell your boyfriend about how tocsin set you up BUT that you weren't raped (thank God).

Anonymous said...

Tell the man you love the truth about your past. If he truly loves you, he will go ahead with the relationship letting the past be by-gone. Also ignore any threats or whatever your friend has to say to you. Live right and believe if you guys are meant to be together, nothing or anyone will come in between you. Just make sure you tell him the whole truth without hiding anything.

Neekee said...

Poster to me I think u should tell him first before Tosin does that way even if he's piseed the love will still be dere n if he loves u like u sed he will come around

Unknown said...

Woman will you listen to my candid advice? if truly you're saying the truth, i sympathize with you.But young girls of now are days are very funny, anyway i don't believe you until i hear from the other party. Notwithstanding, i wish you open up to your man about the ugly incident that happened a fore time before your so call ghost start chasing you with your past (Threat). tolu

teeee said...

stop being weak,tel the guy the whole truth, if he leaves you then move on, he is not your only chance of survival.
you can survive on your own, learn to be happy with yourself and that's all that matters.
Screw him if he leave you cos you were raped..and pls you didn't do anything stupid and it wasn't your fault.
as for your virginity...even most of those who chose who they gave it to...regrets it down the line....
swty pls cheer up and build your life.

ganiyat ottun said...

i tink u shuld tell him abt ur past,if he truly love u,he wil 4giv nd 4get.Lov covers multitude of sin.

Anonymous said...

hi dear girl...GOD is so gud and he wants to make u happy again..just pray n trust him no human being will drive ur husband away no matter what...that evil person will be punished for his bad mouth shame upon him...mtu mzima OVYOOOOOOOOO.

Anonymous said...

Explain everything to the guy... he may be understanding

lade said...

Call your man and congide in him if he doesn't want you God will provide a better one if he does tell the stupid tosin to go ahead and see how she will be mocked

Anonymous said...

pleaase open up to your man, thr earlier the better.then when he knew two of you can call tosin and address the issue. very simple with prayer

Love Doctor said...

Sad story. However, it's best you tell your man before Tosin opens up. If he truely loves you and you've been genuine since you've been together then there's no reason for him to doubt you.

lade said...

Call your man and confide in him of he doesn't want you don't worry God will provide a better man if he does tell the stupid tosin to go ahead and see how she will be mocked

Priscilla said...

Thank God you met a guy who made you love again. To avoid your guy hearing from his cousin tell him first and very soon because Tosin may twist the story and make you look much worse. If he does love you this much them you don't have to worry. He will be angry at you for not telling him earlier but he will talk to his family and defend you at all times. You are still a woman whether raped before or not.
I do know how you feel because I have been there but I met a really good man who is a God sent.
Please talk to him really soon before Tosin talks to the family or anyone in the family.

Anonymous said...

Babe if u love this guy and he loves u. Then u should let him know. If he wants to stay then he will. However what happened was childish mistake
U didnt cause that

Anonymous said...

Yes it has happend it has happend, but my advised is for you to call personally Tosin n explained things to her on how she was the architect of every ting. If she is not going to give a listen ears then u don't have no option than to go details to ur would be fiancé ,tell him your past including everything. So if eventually Tosin goes gaga it will not be a news to ur fiancé. @

Anonymous said...

It's is better u tell d guy d truth b4 ur friend let d cat out of d bag. If truely he loves u he will accept u no matter how

Unknown said...

it's very bad to play all those dirty tricks while in school though...but it will be very wise of you if u can narrate the whole thing to your new Boo..it's well

Anonymous said...

I will advise you tell him about it.....u said ur both in love.......if ur love can overcome that then for sure he loves you

Anonymous said...

Dear Poster, I feel ur pain. But the best thing u should do is tell ur fiance bout it! U didn't leave a reckless life, after all it was his cousin dat caused it all, if he's reasonable, he'll never let u go! Goodluck
Princessiphy@gmail.com

Anonymous said...

you dated a guy to the point of proposal and this your story never came up? Whatelse are you hiding?

Anonymous said...

the poster should come clean and tell her fiance the story she just narrated. if this guy is truly amazing, he is going to accept her for who she is and with her past.

Anonymous said...

My dear, only u can save ur relationship.. U have 2 tell ur fiancee d whole truth, I mean, it wasn't ur fault that u were raped. As 4 d bitch Tosin, don't even call her bluff, its better her cousin hears from u first, than hearing it from a third party. Plus, if he does love u like u said, he should forgive u readily, because like I said, it wasn't ur fault u got raped..

Anonymous said...

Tell d guy abt ur past....make him undastand dat it happened all bcus of his "cousin"

Anonymous said...

Tell d guy....

MISS UNDERSTOOD said...

All this fiction LIBers will fabricate or Linda herself will fabricate. This is a no brainer. Let Tosin tell her cousin and if her cousin hears your own side of the story, leave him to his judgement. Sounds more like a badly written nollywood script.......

Anonymous said...

how you were disvirgined would have been the first thing you tell the person you claim to love. lies always come back to bite us in the butts. your tosin is very wicked tho...pele

Anonymous said...

Na only u waka come? How come na only u dey get all these coincidences? I'll give you a 50% overall. I know that u are an aspiring story writer, but u got to try harder next time. Try and reduce the number of coincidences in your story, so that it will be somehow credible. The story line is a bit interesting, I'll give u 50% there. Ehmm, the characters are very uninspiring, for that I give u 30%. The moral of the story is neither here nor there, for that I give you 40%.
Finally, this story won't be a success at the box office, it sounds so amateurish. Please, come up with a better story next time. But I commend you for at the least trying.

Mirabel01 said...

You should tell him about it before anyone will. Goodluck

Anonymous said...

karma is a b**th.#THAT AKWA IBOM BOY#

Mama said...

The truth will set you free!!!
Tell your man everything that happened. The rape was not your fault, you were tricked into it.
If he is the Man for you he will stand by you. Tell him everything including how Tosin is now threatening you.
God will grant you favour in Jesus Name.

Anonymous said...

She should tell the guy herself na, she's just making a small issue complicated.

samlolo said...

LET HER DO HER WORST........@LEAST YOU BOTH YOUR STORIES.

Anonymous said...

Kai!na wa oh...women!

Anonymous said...

Silly girl. Why will a guy dump you because you were raped under that circumstance that your friend who also happens to be his cousin pushed you into? Did you catch hiv from the ordeal? Except you are hiding something, there is no reason to be afraid to tell ur boo the truth.

Anonymous said...

Dear tell ur man everything u've written here, dat s stupid. For Gods sake who is perfect?

Anonymous said...

Let her go ahead. I don't think that should bother u. I will advise you let the guy know if he aint aware.

Anonymous said...

It's a pity dear but please open up to the man who loves you. Tell him the whole story as it is. Your husband will stay...Dont let that wicked friend of yours blackmail you...You are blessed dear.

We all have our dark secrets...my partner knows it all..love you.

Anonymous said...

You should not be any of that. You should tell ur man. It was not your fault. Don't be made to feel guilty for it.

Anonymous said...

The guy is a fool for threatening you. Let your fiance know about the rape but don't 'name names'. Any day the fool confronts you, put it to your guy that he was the monster... if he (your fiance) loves you, he will accept you!

Anonymous said...

My dear,1st of all,call ur man and tell him everything dat happened back den and pls don't add or remove,tell him d truth and God wil help u.

Anonymous said...

First of all.. you should have told him before you got engaged.. if he really loves you, he will understand. Secondly, just tell him yourself before he hears it from someone else that would add spice to the story. If he loves you, that wouldnt be a problem... that tosin girl shhaaa

aojin said...

Be the best to break the news to your boo. If he loves you he will understand the situation. Everybody got a past. Do you know how many rapes which is never mentioned, relax and don't let it get at you

Emjay said...

My dear,no need to panic,call ur boyfrnd and explain everytin dat happened to him,if he luvs u as claimed,he will forgive u,after all,d rape case is ur past

Anonymous said...

Be the first to tell him, and also give him the details about how it happened, if he is yours, he will stay and if he is not let him go..

crownwonder said...

just tell ur guy the truth.....nd that tosin is a stupid one.....such is life..i alwayz say whenever you do anything in this life consider urself first

Anonymous said...

Dear young lady, you have to face life's challenges. If Tosin is threatening to tell her cousin, let her go ahead, the worse is that you'll lose this man but it's not the end of the world.
Everybody has a past and if your man can't accept it, so be it.He is not meant for you.
Stop blaming yourself of the past, after all you were forced. Move on and live the best life has to offer.
Finally, if you are not a christian, think of accepting Christ who can make you a new person.

Unknown said...

All you have to do is sit your man down and tell him word for word what happened and tell him his cousin's involvement in the whole thing and how she's blackmailing you now. Just be honest.

Anonymous said...

My put the past and the fear behind and ride on..... try your possibly best to table all that happened in the past to your current guy and don't be afraid of loosing him. cause if he loves you that much, he knows what to do. except he wants to continue where his so called cousin stops.

Anonymous said...

This is sad... If you truly love him, you should be able to sit him down nd tell him about every damn thing! If he's really the one for you, he'll stay bet if not, he can like to fuck off! Life goes on
Linda post my comment for once -___-

Anonymous said...

I would advise you tell him first before she does and be prepared for the worse. If he doesn't go ahead with the marriage then just let it go. It would hurt but you would get over it. It's better to hear the worst things from the person you are dealing with than to hear it from a third party. Tell him the whole story and how the intention from the beginning was to help his cousin get revenge. In any case, I would expect that this is something you should have spoken to him about for you people to have come this far.

Nochade's Blog said...

you should open up and talk to your guy to avoid blackmail. if he really loves you, he will stay..after all u'r the victim of the rape. u didn't beg for it. Tell ur guy before his cousin helps u out.

Patience said...

My dear, so sorry about your predicament. You are not alone and many girls have gone through similar experience and still going through that. However, I will advise you tell your fiancé about your experience. You need to soberly open up and tell him the whole truth. I can assure you this truth will set you free. It's better he hears it from your mouth than that of Tosins. In fact, at the end tell him you will not like to continue with the marriage plans since he is related to Tosin because the girl will forever make you feel guilty.....don't be afraid because he loves you and will understand and even protect you from anybody . He will not let you go. Just try it.

Anonymous said...

I suggest you tell your man about it. If he really loves you he will only love you more for what you have been through and please don't blame yourself. It wasn't your fault.

If you don't tell him it will continue to haunt you to be honest you don't have an option and it's better he hears it from you.

Anonymous said...

if you really love him tell him, before she does because it is better for him to hear it from you than from her, besides she is the reason it happened to you in the first place

Anonymous said...

babe, talk to your guy first before she sings to the family
let him know what transpired then, if he really loves you, he'll forgive you

Unknown said...

As much as I empathise with you, I would say you brought it upon yourself. Vengeance is mine says the Lord.

Well, my advice for you would be to come clean to your fiancé. Tell him everything that transpired between Tosin, Jide, Frank and yourself and if he (your fiancé) truly loves you, this will only make your relationship stronger. HONESTY is the best policy. If after telling him the truth and he ends things with you, do not let it weigh you down. It is his own loss and maybe, just maybe he is not the man for you.

Every woman deserves to be happy and I am sure you will eventually find a man that will make you happy. You need to forgive Tosin and steer clear of her. She is not a good friend.

All the best.

Slk.

Unknown said...

Firstly I think you should pray to God about it and if it's his will...definitely he would still keep you guys together,and would create a Way or on the other hand you could find a confidante in your fiancé and open up to him, let him know all that happened...if he truly loves you he'd stick with you no matter what's happened in the past...but just ensure you tell him first before tosin does..everything would be fine sweetheart, ur happiness doesn't rest on that " Cheerz!! Goodluck

Anonymous said...

Dear girl,be bold enough to tell the guy by yourself. U didn't ask to be raped. Best wishes

Anonymous said...

my darling pls tell ur man about it, tell him exactly wat happened, how it happened, y it happened. let him den decide if e will leave u or stay wit u. before ur evil friend does.

Unknown said...

Y nt tell ur guy dis story,if truly he luvz u he ll stay

Unknown said...

Maybe there's more coz if its just abt d rape she is threatening to tell den i dn't see any big deal.. Yu go ahead n tell him everthng abt ur past so yu cn cum clean, n if he luv's yu like yu claim he does he will stick arnd n wn't judge yu by ur past..

Idi said...

U shud tell Ur man everytin! that's the way forward

Unknown said...

Your friend is a very wicked person.
That is why women friends are always very difficult to trust.
You want my advice, go ahead and tell your man the whole truth and I tell you, if the guy is for you he will stay.

Funso Samuel said...

It is well o.If the guy really loves you as you claim..let your friend tell him.Infact,it will be good if you tell him yourself.Love conquers all things.It is your past

Anonymous said...

Tell him d truth if he really love u he will not leave u, but don't lie 4 any reason no matter what

Anonymous said...

Just ignore her nd continue the relationship if the man loves you he won't give up on you

Anonymous said...

Go ahead and tell him urself, if he loves you, he will stay

Anonymous said...

My dear go ahead and confess to ur fiance before she does else u might lose him,d Tosin girl is an ingrate am sure she's nt married yet.

Anonymous said...

Tell your fiance yourself.There is no use hiding it. If he truly loves you he will stay. I believe he will stay if you are open about it. And please when you tell him (and you are still with him), do not let Tosin know you have told him until later if the threats continue. She is obviously a selfish friend.
I wish you well and pray your love stays with you.

horluwatosyne said...

Tell him about it.....

Anonymous said...

Qiuckly open up to the guy before he hears it from Tosin... if he loves you he will staty, if not he will take a walk and you will find love again. just see it as a test of his love for you... you

Anonymous said...

babe u no sharp at all o tell d gye urself paint d story wel so dat wen tosin open mouth she will lok stupid...

Anonymous said...

Nawa o. Tell him b4 she tells him

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