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Monday 2 November 2009

The best you can...is good enough!

If you noticed I haven't done any kind of motivational writing in a long time. That's because I've been looking for motivation myself. I haven't been able to inspire anyone because I've been looking for inspiration.

I've tried several times this year to write inspiring posts but every single time I try, I don't know what to write or where to start...how can you write words you no longer believe in?

I've had the most difficult year. I've had days when I wondered if it will ever get any better. I've been close to tears many times. I've searched for words to help me through difficult times. Sometimes I find it, sometimes I don't.

When people come to me with their problems; expecting me to tell them it will be alright - I just give them a blank stare. In my mind I'm thinking - Why don't you deal with your problems while I deal with mine?

But then yesterday I met a guy who said to me, "If I know for sure that there is heaven and I would go there if I died, I would have killed myself long ago".

Those words brought me back and helped me find my voice again. I sat with this guy for over an hour just talking to him...because somehow I was convinced in my heart that he meant those words.

He was in such a low place because of the way he's convinced life had dealt with him. He thinks he's a failure. He's never had anything he wanted or prayed for...he's not living the life he'd hoped for. He was better off dead he believed.

Not too many people are suicidal...but a lot of us don't like who we are, or where we are at.

I know I have thousands of readers; most of you come here for entertainment...so this post is obviously not for everyone. I want to reach out to the very few or very plenty out there who are at a very low place right now. People who think that they are FAILURES.

This is what I have to say to you.

You see some of us are born rich; some of us are born with talents, while some of us are just born 'lucky'. But no one, I repeat, no one is born a FAILURE. No one is born better than another. No human being on earth is better than YOU!

Yes, they've achieved. They are more beautiful. They are famous. They are married. They have kids. They have successful businesses. They have more respect.

Yes they have all that. So? What's that got to do with you? They are in their lives spiritual journey, face yours.

And in facing yours, all you need to do is TRY.

You want to get married - go out, meet people, ask friends to introduce you. When you find a potential, you try your best to make it work. If it does, great! If it doesn't - at least you tried.
If you want a job, apply as many times as you get the opportunity. If you get a good job, great! If you don't - at least you tried.
If you want your own business - start it. If it's successful, great! If it's not - at least you tried.

Trying is all that is expected of us. Do the best you can each day and leave the rest. And in doing your best, if you fail...it doesn't matter. Failing doesn't make you a failure. Failing should never be the issue. The issue is; did you try? Did you give it your best shot? Did you fight for it? As long as you gave it your best, nothing else matters.

So don’t you dare close your eyes at night and hate who you are.
Don’t you dare open it in the morning and question your purpose on earth
Calling yourself a failure is calling God a failure. Questioning your purpose on earth is questioning God’s purpose in your life. Stop it!

Also to stay sane you have to stop comparing yourself with other people. Comparing will only get you depressed or jealous or resentful. We are all on a journey to find something, to become something, to learn something. Our journey has nothing to do with how well other people are doing, or what they have. It shouldn't be our business. We should stop focusing on what other people are doing in their lives and focus on what we are doing. Instead of comparing, why don't you look at your strengths and see your true value. Celebrate yourself. Be proud of yourself. Failures and all.

So the next time you hear yourself saying negative or self-defeating things, stop and consider the truth of your circumstances. If you’re not doing your honest best, do something. If you are doing your best, celebrate it no matter the result and enjoy the contentment that follow.

If you give your best shot - and you fail - with a huge smile on your face - you should say, NEXT! :-).

And to hell with people who laugh at your failures or point it out. They can shove their opinions up their arses. :-)

Look up and lighten up. You are not a failure. Accept that and try to surround yourself with people who love you enough to accept your successes and your failures.

Let me reiterate - If you do the best you can...the best you can is good enough. I don't think God expects more from us - we shouldn't either.

There's so much I want to write, but words fail me too much these days...but I hope you picked up one or two things. If nothing I wrote above helped you in anyway then take this with you...It's helped me a lot.

You know they say in life it's turn by turn. Today it's Mr. A's turn, tomorrow its Mr. B's turn. Your turn is when God blesses you so much you can't count it all, or describe it. He blesses you so much you start to wonder if you deserve it. Well guess what? It hasn't reached your turn yet. God hasn't faced you yet. When He does...you will be so overwhelmed with joy you won't be able to stop crying. Let everyone around you ENJOY. It's their turn. Your turn is coming and it's coming soon.
You best believe that!

In this new month of November, may God grant you your hearts' desires. May He give you everything you need, everything you've hoped for, everything you've prayed for, everything you've given up on, but mostly every good thing you don't think you deserve.
And remember; strive to do your best, not to be the best.
God bless you all and have a great week ahead.
L

37 comments:

Tatababe said...

Word! Thank you for doing this Linda.

Anonymous said...

Thanks Linda, i just turned to ur page wit d hope of somethin to cheer me up n i got this... Thanks for these words, they really go a long way.... Of late, i've really been at d verge of loosin it n all dat. Just tired of all happenin around me. This is really refreshin. Thank

Anonymous said...

I hear words of encouragement, inspirations, and all of that, but still doesn't take away the hopelessness, and helplessness I feel deep inside. I had plans or visioned where and how I want my life to be, but my life is just the opposite of what I want it to be. I feel like a failure and a loser.

There are times, when I go to bed, and wish i don't wake, and when I do wake up, I ask, why am I still here? I'm constantly thinking of suicide.

It doesn't help that my family and close friends have no idea what I go through on the inside. They see a beautiful, intelligent girl, funny, insightful, seems happy, but don't know the pain, hurt, disappointment, I feel inside. They tell me you have no reason to be sad. The truth is, it looks like I have it together, but to me I don't, because of the high expectations I put on myself. I literally feel stuck in life. I've prayed several times, got no answer, and I just feel like God doesn't care either. I've cried my eyes out. Ok, a psychologist will probably say, I'm highly depressed, emotionally unstable, etc.

Even with the hell I go through inside, I always hear this voice deep inside, that says, keep holding on, it's going to be alright. Even though, I feel like God is not hearing me out, doesn't care about me, I try to remind myself that, the fact that I'm able to wake up every morning, breathing, have my organs working well, have basic necessities, because there are people out there who are between life and death, don't have what I have, but still want to live. The fact that God wakes me up every morning, I know HE has a reason for that, and I will continue to hold on, even if it looks like forever, to see what God has in store for me. It sounds cliche, but God is the one that keeps me going. I try to read the Bible to get my encouragement, and inspiration. I truly find my happiness, joy, peace in God.

Yankeenaijababe said...

wow!this was so encouraging, I needed it . happy new month to u Linda

Admin said...

Yeah well written,its basically inspirational,have something like this on my blog now from robert greene

Unknown said...

Viola! so overwhelming,what a contact...glorious writing, a master piece, a healthy seed of words,dynamism.GOD bless YOU!

Anonymous said...

may he grant u the same linda, well written, great way to start monday, thanks.

Violet said...

Dearest Linda,ur post dis morning revived n took me back to memory lane once again. I open ur blog once i get to work every morning n i tell u,u r doing great.To me,u r one of d many outstanding young women in naija.Ur posts r not just educating but inspiring.Keep it up!
As i was going to work dis morning,i got thinking abt my life,as at dis time last year,i was depressed.No good job,uncertain r/ship,i was always unhappy n felt like a failure but i made a prayer b4 end of d year,in fact,i made up my mind one morning to quit my job,i just packed few things n headed straight to Canaanland(Winners Chapel) in Otta for Shiloh(i'm not a member of d church though) but i didn't know wht came into me.As i was in d bus,i listed my problems n all i wanted frm God.Today,not all my requests r met but better part of them.I got married dis year,got pregnant during my honeymoon,got a better job offer but i dnt have a car yet,still jumping bus wit my baby bump-dis part got me worried dis morning,i mean how can i be pregnant n b hopping frm one bike to d other,frm one bus to d other but ur post has reminded me dat "no matter how bad it looks,d best is yet to come". And surely,God answers prayers.

pretty damsel said...

God bless u linda.....u lifted my spirit this morning.

ur an inspiration.

Anonymous said...

Nice one Linda
I am so inspired!

yhurmie said...

Linda, its posts like this that keep me haunting your blog...

This is such an insightful write-up...I did find more that 2 things to take away...God bless you.

- your 'fan' at the galleria last friday ;-)

Anonymous said...

Linda, you are such an inspiration to your generation, you are a blessing to them. You woill not know how many people read your blog and get inspired by such a young generation. I am one and I am not ashamed to say so. Life is a gift people should use it well, not looking at others to outdo each other - the Facebook generation use it wisely not for comparing yourselves to others - which causes all the ill feelings Linda has listed above. God bless you and have a nice day.

Anonymous said...

WOW! thank you so much for those inspirational words.....
this is my second time of viewing your blog and i've really been touched.....i can't thank you enough.
keep up the good work and may GOd continue to bless you richly in all your endeavours......
Have a great and fulfilling month

BUTTERMINT said...

AMEN LINDA....I NEEDED TO HEAR THAT U ARE THE BEST...THANKS

maybe,, said...

Linda what can i say? You rock over and over again.
The part that trips me is how you don't distance yourself from 'the way it is'.. that takes massive guts and i commend you for it.
u keep me coming back for more!!
really would love to meet you but don't want to go through that whole just calling you up randomly....want to get to meet you by chance (no stalking), strike up a conversation and the whole works.
What i'd give to see you never have one of 'em bad days ever again. Yeah, I'm not God but the part i can help, i will and the part i cant ill pray like maaaaaaad that its all sorted in a jiffy!
Linda Ikeji, you're an inspiration

Anonymous said...

Very Encouraging linda.
But let me just add one more thing u got to hold on to!if u feel u ve not done well dis yr or all has not been the way u planned it.just know that but for God it would have been worse than that.And besides if u ve lost anything atall God is the sole reason that u ve not lost it all.
Acknowledge the fact that ur still alive in the land of the living ,itz enough to be grateful unto God for.U have ur loved ones and family around u be glad and give him the thanx due to him.In due season he shall put a new song in ur mouth.Checkout how far he has brought u and where hez taking u into ,an enviable destiny cant u see what am seeing???????check out ur show and other things u do,but if ur truthful u have uncountable reasons 2 be grateful to God withoutb murmuring knowing fully well that he knowz whatz best for and and when itz due.so relax,thus they say a thinker is a thanker....

see evrytime u stil have words that inspire others.Geee nothing spoil ,keep holding on for in due season ,he ll cause ur voice to be heard.plenty are millionaires but aint got life and some married but have divorced or better said in hell ,some dont even have hope ataall....stay cool and pray .God bless

Anonymous said...

This is simply refreshing, kinda feel depressed sum times but all i've got to do is hold on those words of urs, and put an extra effort in evti tin i desire.really nice one cumin frm u.all d best n may the Beautiful Lord perfect all u eva ask of him 2 in ur life.take kia

Anonymous said...

In as much as i respect your opinion on this,i have to call it as bullshit when you said NOBODY was born a failure.
What then do you call someone who never prospers in ANYTHING they lay their hands on,who is ALWAYS at least 3 years behind on anything they start off with their contemporaries,has NEVER had a relationship work out,who tries and tries and tries and always FAILS.
What do you call someone who has called unto God so many times,yet all they hear is a deafening silence that then convinces you that the concept of God is nonsense and just a system to make us obey rules like sheep and goats?
What do you call someone who has never had a break in their life,but keeps jumping from one issue to the other?
After a while Linda,you resign yourself to fate and just wait for death.

That is all i seek.

All the best,BUT some people are born to fail and to never make it in this lifetime.

Kennedy said...

God bless you linda... These words inspire people like me.. Nigerian youths deserve people like you as a mentor.. God bless u

Anonymous said...

Waoooo, dats all i can say, tank u linda Ikeji...u are wounderful.

Anonymous said...

@Voilet, I wish I was in your shoes I would not mind making long treks with a bump but I can't have one, my only option is IVF ( which will cost $10,000 - 12,000). I was diagnosed with endo and blocked tubes. In every situation you are in Thank God because it can be worse. I am still grateful because there are some women that even IVF is not possible. I am still waiting if my insurance will pay. Praying, waiting and hoping.

Anonymous said...

This is my best post yet. It's timely bcos I have been going thru a lot this year. I have felt lost, alone, empty and hurt. Yet I have attained a lot education and career wise and still have a lot to be thankful for.
Its just that the pain has been overwhelming. I relocated to a different country to further my education, and now that im done i cant seem to find a job,lost my dad 2 months ago and cldnt even go home for the burial, my longtime b/f is acting up, i cant get a place of my own now cos i cant afford to pay bills yet. Too much has happened within a short period of time.
I reluctantly went to church yday and was so glad i did cos I felt like the message was meant for me. The pastors asked if there is anyone who is going thru stuff and wants prayers. I was initially ashamed but decided to stand up. Low and behold I wasnt the only one. So many pple stood up and went infront of the church. Everyone is going thru one thing or the other. Many will never voice it out.I have felt suicidal too and feel like whats the point being alive when there's no joy.
It's just the faith that I have in God that is sustaining me.
Thanks Linda. I really need those words of encouragement.

Nnebuihe said...

Great job on inspiring people with these words...sometimes people do need something like this to help them through their rough times...nicely said

Anonymous said...

OMG!!!!!!!!!!! Linda u are awesome...you just made my day, i was feeling the exact same way.and I pray that motivation stays with ...
love from my heart!

jczgrl said...

A motivational speaker I recently listened to said, "you don't fail from a thing, you learn from it." So don't be too afraid to step out again into whatever venture God lays on your heart. If it doesn't work out, you learn from it and move on. If it does, you learn from it also and continue to improve. I totally heart everyone's comments especially Anonymous 4:25 but somehow you hear a teeny voice inside you that keeps encouraging you to hold on and not break down. Its been a super rough year with unexpected challenges, but we're not ones who give up but those who tenaciously hold on to our faith till breadth leaves us. So to those who think you've failed, you never did. You just learned a lesson!!!

Linda Ikeji said...

@anon 5:59...when i was talking to this other guy, I had tears in my eyes. ur comment also brought tears to my eyes. I mean, how do u even talk to someone who has totally lost all hope and given up - and only now awaits death?

i wish i had the right words to restore ur faith or the faith of person/people u are refering to.

no matter how bad it is for u right now...u have to believe it's not always going to be like this. there's definitely light at the end of the tunnel. ur turn is coming.

God knows what he's doing in our lives. he's not deaf, he hears our cries, he sees our hearts...u need to believe this and walk in faith. U can't give up on God or start to doubt his existence. he's there, he sees u and he knows what u need and he will give them to u in his own time.

do u remember how long it took the Daniel in the bible to be blessed by God? God had sent his angel with Daniel's answered prayers only for the angel to be refused entry into the city by the prince of persia (demon)...but eventually his blessing came because he never stopped hoping or believing.

in times like this, i think u should take a good look at urself - maybe there's something God wants you to do or see or be that hasn't happened. look internally and find ur truth...no one else can find it for u.

so pls no more talk of waiting for death. and no more talk of failure. Our God didn't create no failure. that's an insult to him.

I hope u find peace of mind and everything u've ever hoped for. somehow i believe u deserve it.
God bless

Sasha said...

@Linda, linda, linda - How many times did i call your name?.....Words fail me at this time. I am lost for words....All i can say is thank you God and i thank God for inspiring you to speak to us through this divine message. I call it divine because i am so touched by this message. You are so right. No one is born a failure. Keep the flag of faith flying and it will be well with you. I know it is easier said than done but you have no other choice than to hold on to God. He is truly faithful. All i have to say is thank you Lord......

Anonymous said...

Hei Linda ,where re u from??????? u re such a sweety,4 me,i b'liv hell is real and heaven is real and hats the only reason i habe nt committed suicide cos i know it s a sure ticket to hell,i dont want to go to hell,but i feel like really there is nothing bout me,how come pple around me dont c it?but then how will they,i m married to the best guy in the world,been married for 10 yrs and u have to trust me on this linda,he s never cheated on me,i ve had ladies walk up to uncountable no of times to ask wot 'jazzz' if used on him,we re both born again but i know other born agin children of God who engage inn such,and my word he takes so much care of me,he dotes on me he adores me,(we have our days though)we ve 3 wonderful kids,both sexes smart and doing well in school,i drive a brand new jeep,we ve travelled practically around the world ,with the kids every summer and sometimes just on our own to be together,as i speak we ve bought tickets for a romantic trip in dec,and guess what?i ve never worked all my life,so what more could a girk
l ask 4 u ll say------wrong!!!!!!! there s more to life,i am grateful to God for all these ,i m soooooooooo thankful,but im so un fulfilled,no one has it all ,i ve taken the pain to write all thes cos i want some one out there to know the things that bring u joy re not the material things,we tend to think,'o if only i can acheive this .........if only i can acquire this.........'all wrong,i still compare myself with pple and i get reall y frustrated ,but in all,i know there is a God up there,who loves me,He has my interest atheart,He has a plan for me,and By His grace,i will fulfill destiny.titi

Anonymous said...

Whao! Linda..Thanks a lot for this inspirating note...just going to be 22 nextt month but life has dealth with me so bad that i've been taken more than 30 tablets each twice within the past week..Got to a stage i started thinking of slithing my wrist. After taking the overdoses and waking up to find tham am still alive and not affected by the drugs,I have come to the conclusion that when u ask God for something,he either says WAIT,NO or he does it immediately. I believe God still has some tasks for me to complete,so,am holding on and surviving by his grace having it at the back of my mind that there is light at the end of the tunnel and though sadness may last for the night,but joy cometh in the morning....

Vera B. said...

Nice motivational peice. We all need a little encouraging at some ponit in life but anaon i don't think people were put on this earth to fail some take a little longer than others.

Click my name if u are interested/enjoy in writing.

Anonymous said...

linda du bist einfach die laufende Granate!cool job

Anonymous said...

Wow such touching words, has any of this advice you are given worked for you if so carry on, if not apply it to yourself before giving advice...

Anonymous said...

well Ms Linda are you ever going to reply to my email on your gmail or the text I sent to your phone number? Thanks Stella

Anonymous said...

Lindalistic linda,happi new month to u. U a always there to lift us up and GOD will forever be lifting u up...............................Stay blessed.
Anonymous 5.59........I feel you,but contemplating suicide or waiting 4 death will never be your portion.Your times are in God 's hands.Pleeeeeeeeeese WAIT PATIENTLY for him.He created u He cannot forget His creations. Everything u desire will fall in place shortly. I ,ve gone through a lot in life too but now things are getting better gradually. This same GOD will surpprise u and evrybdy going through pains. Love u all. MIMI

Bookees said...

Many thanks Linda. This is so helpful.

AliceDCL said...

linda...
trust me dis post made me realize that all i have to do is try......
all i have to do is try...

YOUR BEST POST YET....

Anonymous said...

Can i pls re-post this on my note on facebook? Dis is just too touching that i think a lot more pple would benefit from it like i did. All copyrights would belong to u. Pls let me know if this is ok.

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