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Saturday, 28 January 2017

Breadcrumbing is the new ghosting. All you need to know

If you haven't been ghosted before, you're one of the lucky ones who are not perplexed and left wondering why the person on the other suddenly decided to cut off all communication without explanation. Ghosting is defined as "the practice of ending a personal relationship with someone by suddenly and without explanation withdrawing from all communication." While disappointed lovers are yet to find a way around it, another evil has reared its ugly head, breadcrumbing. Urban Dictionary have summed it up perfectly:

"The act of sending out flirtatious, but non-committal text messages (i.e breadcrumbs') to members of the opposite sex in order to lure a sexual partner without expending much effort."
In other words, someone acting like they want you but unwilling to put in the effort and make their intentions known, they send out mixed signals.

Breadcrumbing perpetrators are essentially giving you false hope that you matter to them in some way, or have been on their mind, yet have no intention of following through with interacting with you in a meaningful way. This is what Sherry Turkle, a professor at M.I.T. who studies how technology shapes modern relationships has to say about it:
"These are connections, not conversations. They can have the paradoxical effect of making the person who receives them feel let down rather than gratified, but then, confused: Is one asking for too much?
"Should one feel satisfied with a smiley face or a series of exclamation marks or a string of emojis?What constitutes being recognized? "
Think of those people crawling all over your social media pages, liking every pic and leaving 'lol' and emojis on every post. Don't fall for it.


victor usifoh da illustrator said...

What wont one hear these days...but folks have been doing diz things since na! So what was it called then? Ohoooo..we dey call am "unseriousness" sorry new atitude name is now BREADCRUMBING. Kai, babe why u dey breadcrumb me na?

NaijaDeltaBabe said...


...merited happiness

Anonymous said...

Dear Linda, sadly they have happened to me both of them o. The relationship ended ghosting, but we still kept talking once awhile. Dude started sending mixed signals and all that, mean while he has a girlfriend o. Even wanted sex on top the mixed signals, smh. Anyway he was my first love and I kind of see him in every guy that ask me out or potential boyfriend, so it has been kind of hard getting into another relationship. But now am ready for me and for love😊

donduke said...

Na WA oo!

Anonymous said...

Chai...I have experienced both.d term" sha. Lemme do some breadcrumbing (not a word).

Unknown said...




Anonymous said...

See them assigning terms to it like it's something new. This is simply wasting someone's time or leading them on. No need for fancy names.

Unknown said...

-D great anonymous now as Vivian Reginalds

Anonymous said...

My husband does this a lot, it is the bane of our major fight. I call it sexchatting.he leads ladies on a sextual flirtatious text sms relationship., I want to believe the relationship always ends ghosting.

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