A Playa has 4 different types of Women ...
1. Wifey
2. Baby Girl
3. Side Piece
4. Jump Off
1) Wifey is the sexiest, most successful and most respected of all the women. She is loved, needed and wanted by her man...she is VIRTUALLY IRREPLACEABLE. She is the girl that the guy loves and will always love, he never wants to see her with another man...BUT he will cheat on her with Baby Girl until he is mature enough to realize that if he gets caught or f--ks up in any way and loses Wifey, he would be screwed, and NEVER be happy again. Wifey gets along with mom, is independent, never nags, loves to dress sexy for her man, can cook an d loves to keep a clean house. Wifey gets called 5 or 6 times a day. Drawback of Wifey, she loves public displays of affection...which might interfere with the acquisition of a Side Piece.
2) Baby Girl is ALWAYS just as hot as wifey and usually has a very active social life...she IS replaceable, thinks she's the next Wifey, but will only be Wifey if an extreme disaster takes place. Baby Girl gets some of the benefits of Wifey, like quality time every now and then and even presents on birthdays and holidays, but that's as far as it goes. The main reason to have Baby Girl is in case Wife really really f--ks up, she can be replaced in a matter of weeks because Baby Girl has been groomed to slip right into her spot. Be careful of Baby Girl, she tends to be just as attached as Wifey and therefore can be dangerous to the Side Piece. Biggest benefit of Baby Girl...she is extremely private and hates causing a scene, baby girl can come into the same restaurant as you and wifey and wifey will have no idea you two even know each other. Baby Girl is a master of disguise as well.
3) Side Piece, usually a female that the guy uses only for sex and other pleasures, she is usually the one that he goes to for that 3-some or some late night head after the club. When Wifey is acting up and Baby Girl is at work, the Side Piece is usually the one to hold him over for a few hrs. He can meet with the Side Piece for reasons other than sex, but normally that only happens one week during the month. Side Pieces are hard to spot when they are out because most of her friends are either Wifey's or Jump Offs. Drawback of having more than one side piece, they usually know each other somehow...we kinda think there is a side piece network.com or something. Try to keep your side piece co unt below 4 if possible.
4) Jump Off ...every mans dream and worst nightmare. She is trying to move up in life, wants to be a Side Piece or Wifey but doesn't know how to go about it. They are just the girls he hollas at when he is with his boys...she is usually stored in the cell phone by a nickname because he barely remembers her real name and where he met her...he only recalls how fat her ass was. The Jump Off gets called in emergencies only, when wifey is moody, baby girl is on vacation and side piece is with her baby's father. The Jump Off is extremely dangerous in public for a number of reasons, she is usually 5 other guys jump off as well, so she might cause drama with you and one of those dudes if you slip up, she also has no problem confronting you in the mall when you are with Wifey (something that baby girl would NEVER do) and the most dangerous thing about Jump Off...she ALWAYS seems to find out where you live and or work.
***A Pimpstress has FOUR KINDS OF MEN…
Enjoy the pictures (smile)
THE HUSBANDHe is the sweetest, loving, kind man you know. His intellect makes him sexy although he is handsome. He treats you like a queen and puts you first. He takes care of the kids, you and home. This is the man you love coming home to. He spoils you with gifts and is a hard worker.
THE BOOThis one is sexy as hell! This is the dude that you've known for years, kinda your homey-lover-friend! No matter who is in your life or who is in his life, you and your BOO seem to always have a thing for each other. Your BOO has a wifey, so he has as much to lose as you do, therefore you are guaranteed that ya'll relationship is on the 'DL'. You run to your BOO when your husband "F" up! Your BOO gives you comfort and the sex is da bomb, which explains why you can't leave him alone!
THE MAINTENANCE MANThis is Mr. Wine and Dine. He has the charm, the romance and a body like a stripper! He is the one you call every now an then when HUSBAND and BOO done pissed you off! He really wants to be your HUSBAND or BOO on the low but he knows his role. HUSBAND will never suspect a thing because this man is the deacon at your church and well respected in the community so no one would know of ya'll secret love affair. You sneak and go on trips and getaways. He keeps that bank account tight . Look at this man's lips. Whew!
THE RUFF NECK
This is the man we fantasize about when HUSBAND, BOO and THE MAINTENANCE man just not doing it for you! This is Mr. Bad Boy, he got the body from hell, the tattoos, and the motorcycle. You call on him when you want your back blown out, the bottom hit, and you want to walk bow legged for a couple days. He is the man HUSBAND sees and knows he needs to get on the treadmill to lose those extra pounds he has gained since ya'll been married. THE RUFF NECK is the one that rock the suits in the day and trade the Armani in for tims and jeans at night. He is pulled out in emergencies only and you can't resist to get your freak on in the craziest places, (in the car, the back of a vacant building, etc.) because his main goal is to tear it up! THE RUFF NECK is in your cell phone as one of your homegirls named Tee-Tee!
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14 comments:
ha yai yai........linda don kill me ooo.THE RUFF NECK ANYTIME.
the husband really resemble husband.
wow.
so are they saying a wifey cant be a wifey,baby girl,side piece and jump off at the same time?na wa oooo
we don suffer for men hand.
funny, sure your classification is not straight jacketed as you place it. A man can act in 2 or 3 scenarios and the woman too, depending on the situation. Nice post though.
So how coe the wifey is white and the others are black?????
who da f**k rote dis piece/ some romantic sicko.roflmao
LINDA did u hear about seun adebiyi....rihanna is also trying to help him....he kinda looks like caroline johnson when she was sick...i feel so bad for him and he wants to be the first nigerian at the winter olympics...please post about this story here if u can...i know intl readers read ur blogs so they can do something.
If anyone is maintaining these many concurrent sexual relationships, they're just giving themselves extra stress, drama and exposing themselves unnecessarily to all sorts of diseases including herpes & HPV (which condoms don't protect you from and for the latter can cause CANCER)
You're not a playa or a pimpstress, your overexposed & foolish.
Linda tell us ya own first before I yarn
WTF? this was just funny. Why would any one want to admit being anything other than the wifey or husband. LOL. Erm, ok.
No comments but those men pics, eye candy.
chai, I'm interested in been the pimptress, all d men look too good.j/k But that's the reason, there's a high rate of infidelity and divorce. Is it that hard to stick to one person. Can the wifey be the babygirl, side piece and jump off. And can the hubby, be the boo, ruff neck, and all of the above. All of these just make me think, if marriage is all worth it.
Ghetto Crap masquerading as profound wisdom.
This promotes infidelity, and the over exposure to the HIV. Play safe, stick to one person. Condoms are considered safer sex, not safest. So if you want the safest sex, be completely monogamous.
I am a wifey,baby girl,side piece and jump off all at the same time.
I am a wifey,baby girl,side piece and jump off all at the same time. my man will not go for another girl.
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