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Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Naija Entertainment News + Jokes

The marriage bug is the air people. A lot of people seem to be getting married these day...
Now I know for sure our very own sweetheart, Tonipayne, is set to wed the newest singing sensation in Nigeria, 9ice.
9ice isn't the only celeb getting married...singer, Nomoreloss is said to be engaged to Rhythm 93.7 presenter, Phoenix.
Azadus is said to be getting ready to wed his pregnant fiancee, Seun.
Rapper, El Dee is engaged to a Dolapo
And all these weddings will take place this year...Congrats to everyone who has found someone. There's nothing more beautiful than that.

At Shan George's album launch.
The actress launched her album at the Niteshift Colisuem on Sunday Februaru 17th 2008 and was attended by the who's who in the entertainment industry.

Omotola Jalade Ekeinde and Dare Art Alade recently added a year

Ali baba's wife
Comedian, Ali Baba's wife, Mary gave birth to a beautiful daughter on Valentines's day and she has since been named Valerie. Congrats to them.

2face postpones tour
2face is presently in Jamaica for the post humous birthday party birthday party of Bob Marley. The unexpected trip affected his scheduled six states musical tour sponsored by MTN billed to commence on Saturday 16th February and end March 8th 2008. 2face is also set to release his 3rd album featuring his duet with R.Kelly.

Timaya shoots 3 videos
Rave of the moment, Timaya, has finally shot 3 videos from his debut album. The three tracks are 'Dem mama', 'True Story', and 'Timaya'. The videos will soon be released for airplay.

Police nab Ini Edo's impersonator
A lady identified as Ada Waller is now in police net for allegedly dropping Ini Edo's name. According to the star actress who has already taken the case to Area F, Nigeria Police, Lagos, the suspet is one of the many girls who drop her name to extort money from men and also bring her to disrepute.

Soundcity plans music video awards
Nigeria's first and foremost lifestyle, music and entertainment TV channel, Soundcity, is set to stage the Soundcity Music Video Awards. The award will take place at the Prestigious Shell Hall of the Muson Centre, Onikan Lagos later in the year.

TOS Benson is dead
Chief TOS Benson is dead. He died at the ripe age of 90, at his home on Wednesday 13th february 13th 2008. He was the first Minister of Information in Nigeria. He was also the husband of Chief Mrs Opral Benson. He will be buried on Friday 29th February. May his soul rest in peace.

Uche Jumbo's stolen car recovered
The Toyota Rav 4 belonging to star actress, Uche Jumbo, which was stolen days back at gun point has been recovered. Some police men in the Lekki area of Lagos saw it where it was abandoned and notified the actress who has since gone to reclaim it. Happy for her!

Weird Mc and Nigga Raw are presently in South Africa to shoot the video of their latest singles on 35mm celuloid camera.














The World Celebrates the 50th Anniversary of Chinua Achebe's "Things Fall Apart"
http://www.cnn.com/2008/SHOWBIZ/books/02/19/chinua.achebe/index.html

Thisday Award winners
Banker of the year - Cecilia Ibru
ICT company of the year - Reltel Wireless
Product of the year - Chivita
Most improved bank - Diamond Bank
Corporate socially responsible company - The UBA foundation
Hotel of the year - Grand Hotel
Airline of the year - Arik Air
Transaction of the year - GT Bank
Bank of the year - Zenith
Oil and Gas company of the year - Zenon petroleum
Company of the year - Dangote sugar refinery
Brands of the year - Access bank and Coca Cola
Stock offer of the year - First Bank offer
Young manager of the year - Toyin Subair
CEO of the year - Mr. Jim Ovia
Enterpreneur of the year - Mr. Femi Otedola
Corporate citizens of the year - Jim Ovia, Aliko Dangote, Mike Adenuga
Insurance company of the year - PHB Insurance


Jokes
Hummer Indeed!
The boss walked into the office one morning not knowing his zipper was down and his fly area wide open. His personal assistant walked up to him and said, 'This morning when you left your house, did you close your garage door?'
The boss told her he knew he'd closed the garage door, and walked into his office puzzled by the question. As he finished his paperwork, he suddenly noticed his fly was open, and zipped it up. He then understood his personal assistant's question about his 'garage door.' He headed out for a cup of coffee and paused by her desk to ask, 'When my garage door was open, did you see my Hummer parked in there? She smiled and said, 'No, I didn't. All I saw was an old mini van with two flat tires.

Life without black people
A very humorous and revealing story is told about a group of white people who were fed up with African Americans, so they joined together and wished themselves away. They passed through a deep dark tunnel and emerged in sort of a twilight zone where there is an America without black people. At first these white people breathed a sigh of relief. "At last", they said, "no more crime, drugs, violence and welfare." All of the blacks have gone! Then suddenly, reality set in. The "NEWAMERICA" is not America at all - only a barren land. 1. There are very few crops that have flourished because the nation was built on a slave-supported system. 2. There are no cities with tall skyscrapers because Alexander Mils, a black man, invented the elevator, and without it, one finds great difficulty reaching higher floors. 3. There are few if any cars because Richard Spikes, a black man, invented the automatic gearshift, Joseph Gambol, also black, invented the Super Charge System for Internal Combustion Engines, and Garrett A. Morgan, a black man, invented the traffic signals.4. Furthermore, one could not use the rapid transit system because its procurer was the electric trolley, which was invented by another black man, Albert R. Robinson.5. Even if there were streets on which cars and a rapid transit system could operate, they were cluttered with paper because an African American, Charles Brooks, invented the street sweeper. 6. There were few if any newspapers, magazines and books because John Love invented the pencil sharpener, William Purveys invented the fountain pen, and Lee Barrage invented the Type Writing Machine and W. A. Love invented the Advanced Printing Press. They were all, you guessed it, Black. 7. Even if Americans could write their letters, articles and books, they would not have been transported by mail because William Barry invented the Postmarking and Canceling Machine, William Purveys invented the Hand Stamp and Philip Downing invented the Letter Drop. 8. The lawns were brown and wilted because Joseph Smith invented the Lawn Sprinkler and John Burr the Lawn Mower. 9. When they entered their homes, they found them to be poorly ventilated and poorly heated. You see, Frederick Jones invented the Air Conditioner and Alice Parker the Heating Furnace. Their homes were also dim. But of course, Lewis Lattimer later invented the Electric Lamp, Michael Harvey invented the lantern, and Granville T. Woods invented the Automatic Cut off Switch. Their homes were also filthy because Thomas W. Steward invented the Mop and Lloyd P. Ray the Dust Pan. 10. Their children met them at the door - barefooted, shabby, motley and unkempt. But what could one expect? Jan E. Matzelinger invented the Shoe Lasting Machine, Walter Sammons invented the Comb, Sarah Boone invented the Ironing Board, and George T. Samon invented the Clothes Dryer. 11. Finally, they were resigned to at least have dinner amidst all of this turmoil. But here again, the food had spoiled because another Black Man, John Standard invented the refrigerator.Now, isn't that something? What would this country be like without the contributions of Blacks, as African-Americans? Martin Luther King, Jr. said, "by the time we leave for work, millions of Americans have depended on the inventions from the minds of Blacks."Black history includes more than just slavery, Frederick Douglass, Martin Luther King, Jr., Malcolm X, and Marcus Garvey & W.E.B. Dubois.

An elderly couple were having dinner at another couple's house and after their meal, the wives left the table to go to the kitchen.
The two elderly gents were talking, and one says: "Last night we went out to a fabulous new restaurant. I'd highly recommend."
The other man says: "What's the name of the restaurant?"
The first man thinks long and hard with a furrowed brow, finally saying: "Ah, what is the name of that red flower you give to someone you love?"
His friend replies: "A carnation?" "No, no. The other one," the man says.
His friend suggest "The poppy?"
"No, no, no" growls the man.
"You know - the one that is red and has thorns."
His friend says: "Do you mean a rose?"
"Yes! Thank you!" the first man says. He then turns toward the kitchen and yells: "Rose, what's the name of that restaurant we went to last night?"

Lie Robot
A little truth won't hurt... but a tight slap from a robot; sure wouldhurt.
This robot is available for sale! pls contact the producers if you need one.....enjoy yr day.One day Kyle's dad brought home a robot. The robot was special in thatit could detect a lie and would slap the person who lied on the face.Kyle returned late from school that day and his dad asked him, "Son whyare you late from school?"Kyle answered, "Dad, we had extra classes today".Much to his astonishment the robot jumped up and slapped Kyle on hisface.His dad told him, "Son this robot is special in that it can detect a lieand will then slap the person who lied. Now come on tell me the truth.Why are you late?""Dad, I went to a movie""Which movie?""The Ten Commandments"Immediately, Kyle got another slap on the face from the robot."Sorry Dad, I went to see the movie Sex Queen"."Shame on you son, when I was your age I never watched obscene movies ormisbehaved" Immediately, the dad gets a tight slap on the face from therobot.Hearing the last sentence, Kyle's mother comes walking out of thekitchen and sarcastically says to her husband, "After all he is YOUR son!!!"To which the robot steps up and gives Kyle's mother a resounding slap on her face!!!

That's all folks...see y'all later.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Ini Edo, is a big woman o! For some females to now resort in using her name and personality; i guess, to extort money from some Nigerian men.

Funnily enough, don't those gullible???? men know Ini Edo? Don't they watch Nigerian/Nollywood movies? Or is it some kind of fantasy thing that they are living off - off the so-called Ini Edo impersonators (not doubting the story,though, it is just my opinion)

Well... it shows that Ini Edo is going places, for real. Hmmmmmmmn... she is lucky and blessed, if you ask me. And those Nigerian men, they never talk true; wetin dere agenda come be.

Li... Li.... omalicha, biko, i fu kwana? Hmmmmmmmmmn.... Oh!

Anonymous said...

I read somewhere yesterday, "Naija artist all shooting in 35mm, is that the new effizy?". LOL. Funny you mentioned it in your blogg.

Anonymous said...

News update.

Nomoreloss and Phonix...engagement is over! The two are no longer together and are now both on the market.

Congrats to Toni Payne.

Congrats to eLDee

Congrats to everyone else.

pink gloves said...

Congrats to all those getting married. May marriage be joyful and blissful for them all.

Thanks for the other gists.