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Tuesday 13 February 2007

HOW TO SPOT A LIAR

How many of have been lied to severally? A lie hurts more when It's being told by someone you love, respect or hold in regards. In my own case I dated someone who told me his Fiancee was his ex-girl friend. At the time I believed it, but I later found out more than seventy percent of everything he ever told me were all lies. So not to fall a victim again, I decided to empower myself with how to know the difference between a lie and the truth. Now trust me, I can tell 80% of the time when someone is lying to me. how did I learn this trick? See it below

1. Know their baseline behavior. Many years of research have proven that it's incredibly difficult to know if someone is lying unless you have prior exposure to his or her baseline behavior and know how they normally act. Be wary of making important deals with people until you've gotten to know them. Watch the person in a variety of situations to ascertain their normal speech patterns, gestures and facial expressions. Then see if those patterns change under questioning.Also, avoid entering into agreements over the phone. Studies show people are most likely to lie via telephone.

2. Establish rapport. Get them relaxed and comfortable. Subtly mimic their posture and movements; speak in their style. This will relax them and wear down their guard.

3. Ask for minute details. Liars hate to give detail and often are evasive. Though con artists normally rehearse their lies and may look completely at ease answering your questions; ask for a lot of specifics. It will be difficult for them to remember what they told you, and they'll eventually trip themselves up. You may want to interrupt them with an unrelated question while they're in the midst of their story, then bring them back to their explanation and see how well it hangs together.

4. Watch for "false" facial expressions. According to Ekman, even the most practiced liars are unable to produce the minute movements in the upper part of the face that naturally come when certain emotions are felt. For example, if someone truly feels fear or sadness their forehead will crease. And when people are genuinely happy, their eye muscles will be involved in their smile. Ekman also says a sign that someone is feigning an emotion is that the facial expressions or onset or offset of the emotion is too abrupt.

5. Give them an out. Finally, make it easy for them to tell you the truth. Never show surprise or a negative reaction. Pretend you either didn't hear them correctly or didn't understand what they said. Always leave a way out so they can recant their words and tell you the truth!


Don't take this information for granted. It really will help you spot who is lying to you. It's better for you to know the truth now, because eventually you'll find it out. And it will hurt more then. What do you guys think?

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

lol....u dis gyal. So, u wan be a body expert now abi?

Anonymous said...

LOL. I also once almost dated someone who told me his fiancee was his ex girlfriend. Luckily, i found out the truth before it could progress, from his fiancee/ex when she somehow got hold of my number and proceeded to willingly inform me on all matters unknown to moi. Charming!
When you find the one, you'd know cos there'd be no need for lies. When i met my hubby, it was obvious he we were meant for each other from the start. So i feel you on this one girl. Best to shine ya eye now jare...

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