I didn't know he was a little peeved until the smell of food drew my attention and I went into the kitchen to get some. He did give me food...but not after telling me he expected to come back and find food ready...I should be serving him and not the other way round. (He's always cooking for me lol...not funny!)
This got me thinking really hard. Those of us who aren't married but are in serious relationships, what exactly are our DUTIES to our BOYFRIENDS? I mean I know what a WIFE'S duties are and God knows I plan to be the best wife in the world (or in Lagos lol), but what are my duties as a girlfriend?
Is it our duty to cook, clean, and take care of our boyfriends every need? I mean it's good enough that they get free sex right? Wrong?
I'm thinking if a man wants a woman who will cook his meals, wash his clothes, clean his house, and generally clean after him, he should get himself a wife right? That's not a girlfriends duty is it?
There have been several cases where a woman will slave for a man, do all the wifely duties and the
Make a honest woman of me and get angry when I dont cook or clean for you right?
I know they say the easiest way to a man's heart is through his stomach, but has anyone ever considered the easiest way to woman's heart?...Get her a maid! lol.
But seriously shouldn't we draw the line with boyfriends and reserve our ALL for our husbands?
Maybe I'm getting this wrong...what do you think?
Meanwhile here's a wife's duty joke
A woman accompanied her husband to the doctor's office. After his checkup , the doctor called the wife into his office alone.
He told her, "Your husband is suffering from a very severe disease, combined with horrible stress . If you don't do the following , your husband will surely die...
Each morning, fix him a healthy breakfast. Be pleasant , and make sure he is in a good mood .
For lunch make him a nutritious meal.
For dinner prepare an especially nice meal for him.
Don't burden him with chores , as he probably had a hard day.
Don't discuss your problems with him, it will only make his stress worse .
And most importantly, make love with your husband several times a week and satisfy his every whim .
If you can do this for the next 10 months to a year, I think your husband will regain his health completely."
On the way home, the husband asked his wife. "What did the doctor say?"
She replied, "You're going to die"!
LM fine AO!
43 comments:
i didnt do cooking,cleaning etc for my man till i became i wife. i don't think a girlfriend should be doin wife duties. That's the way I see it.
I dont think a girlfriend should fulfil every wifey duty unless her man is fulfilling every husbandy (lol) duty.I mean its hard to say exactly when and where it all starts but i guess the longer one stays together a couple,the more flexible the relationship is.
It is striking the balance that really matters.because if ur fulfiling every wifey duty,and your boyfi isnt ready to settle down,good luck to you o,because as my pastor says the men would think
why buy the cow when you get the milk for free???
but also,I dont see anything wrong with my boyfriend fixing a meal for the both of us!(obv not while i'm on the net,except i'm super tired or ill..lol)
Linda you are too funny. I have never lived with a boyfriend ever. I live alone have had only long distance relationships (ask me how I do it) anyways I am not use to takin care of a man and where is the law that defines a woman's duty? especially now that we work as the men work it shud be a balance. I know as a woman I will do a lot more cus a lot of men are not smart to do certain work, 'its a woman's thing' whatever. I am looking for balance can't suffer with a dude like a slave sorry.
a girlfriend certainly has no duty in a man's house,until they're legally married.if she wants 2 help with cooking or some house chores,fine.but no job is meant for a girlfriend.if d boyfriend wants 2 be treated like a husband then he shld take her to the altar.
i am a guy and i think it is archaic for a man in this day and age to expect to be waited on hand and foot!
i only cooked for him days after he proposed. i dont really like cooking for boyfriends in case if i get dumped at least i would not beat myself up for spending all that time cooking for him.
I can cook all day long as long as I wont have to bother the dishing and vacuming of floor. Laundry is ok too but to fold the cloth are somewhat hard. So are Vera lucky or not?
The way to a women's heart is to get her a maid..lol. So true and add diamonds as well.
Abt duties, well the way I see it is everything is shared equally. If I cook, then he will do the dishes and vice versa. If I tidy up the bedroom, then he will tidy up the sitting room.
As the saying goes...all featherless bipeds are EQUAL
You are his girlfriend not his slave so men really should understand that when we do all these things for them, its not a right, its a priviledge. You know what cracks me up out here, when SOME naija guys date AA chicks they wont even try that mess with them, but as soon as hey hook up with a naija babes, they have seen slave. lol.
Hmmmm, why person go do "pre-suffering"? Well, cooking now and then is okay, but YOU should do it cos YOU want to, out of love, or kindness or pity, whatever. However, that whole "where is my food" thing, is a serious turn off!Naija men, abeg, that thing is disgusting, you guys should stop that nonsense, if you are hungry, go to the kitchen, if there is no sign of food, it means there is NONE.Hissssssssssssssssssssss.
LOL! The joke was great.
I don't think as a girlfriend you should do anything you don't want to do. And even as a wife I don't think you should do what you don't want to do. If you do not want to clean for him now Linda, you are not going to want to clean for him when you're married.
Naija men need to realise that some women dig that shit, and others just DON'T! As for me, I will ARRIVE with my maid, cook, gardener and maybe even a fucking butler from Day 1. My future hubby will not be able to say that he was not warned. Perhaps I'll even make it one of my wedding vows? Lol! Xxx
Heeeeeey!! Confessions of a moody crab has said it all. The way to a woman's heart is to get her a maid and spoil her with gifts. My bf had a steward for 1 year,he cooked and cleaned our stuff and the house.He pissed me off one day, i sacked him, now i cook his food(make different dishes and put in tauparware) and do his laundry,but it's easier cos he has a washing machine and a dryer, so i don't really stress myself.(I go see him weekends cos i work weekdays). And because i do his stuff for him, he increased my allowance.Lol. He trippled it.
You want some one to care for u 100%? get a wife. Simple and short! No story!
Linda, your blog is becoming a newspaper. One never gets to finish reading every detail of it(Or am I too tied up).
I predicted it. it's getting hot and hotter.
cheerz,
heyma
linda u are gradually becoming a comedian.
lol @ the joke.
No woman should cook or clean for a man who is not her husband.
@ vera, he tripled your allowance?????
It does not matter how u look at it, society has defined your roles as a woman to wait on the man.
In the beginning they can talk out the side of their mouth about how they are in progressive times but it is so much easier on their pride and ego if the status quo of societal roles are kept up...
Thanks for stopping by my blog
This is a serious issue cos I think about it everytime. Personally, i think men nowadays want the good old ways of women (girlfriends or wives) taking care of their every whim. But have they thought about this - those days the man was the sole provider and the woman the homemaker.
Now they want us to work just like them or even harder and also be home-makers. Its so unfair.
But wetin we go do. Its really a man's world and most of the time a no-win situation for ladies who eventually want to get married or stay married. If u talk say u no do, another desperate babe out there go do times 4 to snatch him!
i liked the joke... It cracked me up silly... As far as relationships go, there's no hard and fast rule... It's tit for tat for me.... I believe both parties should share the chores around the house, whether married or not...it's not the womans or the mans job to do any specific thing! the key is for them to help each other out without ill feelings or keeping records of who does more because definitely one person will do more than the other.... both parties should support each other the best they can do possibly.....
for all those who don't do cooking, cleaning etc for their boyfriends, don't expect him to do the same for you! and if you do it and he doesn't reciprocate then you are on your own o! but I don't like the idea of doing something for a partner cos of gifts or summin...
@ Anonymous. He did. This is no joke. I am very serious.
hell no!!!!!!!!!!! if he wants u to cook,clean or wipe his ass then do it but only as his wife but also remember if u aint doing it some other sister will glady do it even if shes the 'other woman''
the "wife" joke is really funny..
i think he is probably taking u as a wife already that swhy he behaves that way. i dont see anything wrong with it anyway.like u said he gets free sex every night(even though u both enjoy it), why not food and all the other things that comes along with it. just my thots
Linda Honey, we all love you but truth be told. Now I don't mean to bash you but you brought this upon yourself. Men don't know the difference between amber and green. It's all GO for them. What I am trying to say is...even if it's just for a weekend that you stay over at a man's house, it automatically puts you in a "she's here and she has to cater to my needs" area. So don't be mad at him or question why he felt the way he felt. You put yourself in the position to be treated like that. I was watching Dr. Phil and on the show they were talking about a woman who lived with her boyfriend for three years and had never even popped the question (M word). So as we were watching the show, my husband blurted out 'he won't marry her now, hin don already get wife'. And funny enuf when Dr. Phil started with her, he looked the lady in the eye and told her "He ain't gonna marry you! You're obviously sleeping with this man, cooking, cleaning, catering to his needs, heck you might even pay a bill or two sometimes. He already got a wife. He aint gonna marry you". The lady started crying and he did not even try to console her. The truth is sometimes we make choices that put us in bad situations. And most of these choices are things that our mothers have told us not to do (LOL).
Big ups to you. Love your blog. Keep it coming! Keep it coming!!
Mrs2cute
lol @ what the woman said to her husband! i actually don't know what i think concerning the girl doing duties as if he is a wife. need to think about that
Wtf!!! is wrong wit some of yu. I mean wats wit cooking and doing da dishes. Aint yu gonna be eating from da same food. Aint yu guyz living together? This is ridiculous.
Listen, this same man buys yu take aways and stuffs and all dat so wats with showin a lil appreciation.
If you cannot do these simple tasks for yur live in lover(boyfriend), its gonna be even more difficult when yu eventually marry.
REASON...
You can't teach an old dog new tricks.
Yu gals sayn, HELL NO! berra wake up cos there's no rule sayn yu cant and wont. Its all 'bout doin da right thing.
MUCHAS GRACIAS!
Tonipayne said it all!
SassyCassie
I think it should work both ways.....both the man and woman should cook, clean and tidy the house.....in proportion. One shouldnt always have to expect the other to do something.....
Like you say he cooks for you, you should also do the same for him.....
xxx
Na waa oo!!!
How come cooking is now a wifely duty but not sex?
Honestly, there is no big deal in cooking unless you just don't like cooking!!
We all know the way to a man's (esp. a Naija man's ) heart is through his tommy.
Girlfriends!! COOK O !!If the man likes to cook then thats your luck otherwise someone else will do it.
If you can,abstain from sex !!(that is more like a wife's duty)
And don't ask me what me how i enticed my hubby though cook I did .
i think wives have dutiess and not girlfriends. For a girlfriend, chores are optional.
LMAO Linda
This is any I LOVE your blog!
I agree, please if he wants all the perks then he should make it official...
Even if after u r married, you are not his servant.
LOL @ bitchy....u r taking ur cook, gardener, butler lol....I am with u on that!
hi linda, ure blog is very informative and i look fwd to ure entries everyday and thats no lie. Concerning the duites of a girlfriend, b/4 i got married i never once thot to myself i had some obligation to cook for my boyfy(husband now). He brought it up and i told him that we arent married so there is no law that says i shd and i refused to becos i believe the cards u deal ureself b4 marriage wil be the ones you have to live up to eventually wen u get married.
But having said that, my sista, ure giving him the whole prize without him paying for it?!!! c'mon why do u think he wants u to cook for him , he's already been granted access so why shdnt he ask you to cook for him?!!! it only makes sense to his male mind so stop complaining gal, u made ure bed so u better lie in it!!;-) (pls dont hate am jus calling it as i see it)
abeg.. this may be an extremem.. theres no such thing as wifey duties or girlfriend duties.. anything that i do for a man is not a duty but a privilege. He should neither expect it or demand it.. nonsense..
Point of correction,only wives have duties not girlfreinds.
The duties of a girlfriend dont include cooking gal.Thats for the man's maid till he gets himself a wife.FINITO!
The classic question is why do women have sex with a man that they are not sure will marry them. When u truly love a man and the man loves u , u should be willing to help each other with stuff around the house when u visit each other, but it is not mandatory cos u both are not married. The cooking sef might help him to want to marry u, bcos he knows his kids will not go hungry. The thing that is sickening is when girls go and live in a man's house and the man has no intention of marrying them.That thing pains me and the woman is used for sex anyhow.I feel the pain of having sex with a man that does not marry u is more painful than cooking for a man that does not marry you.
pls what the duties of a girlfriend? since it does not include cooking does it include sleeping together?
im sorry y'all but in my world, there arr no wife or girlfriend duties.
wat d hell?????
lets put aside cooking 1st.... say a married woman isnt in d mood 2 have sex with her hubby ryt, so she must oblige 2 it cos its HER DUTY????
PLS O! LET ME HEAR WORD!
roger that i'm a babe!
linda you dey try o with all this inside gist!!!
It's only when u become his wife that you should do the wifey duties
If he wants u to do the wifey duties, he must perform the duties of a wonderful husband........ case closed
There are no girlfriend duties simple and ahort.
y now... it is wrong for a girlfirend to do wifey's duties... i no fit sha
INTERESTIN.
www.dirtyhiphophead.blogspot.com
this is a great blog i am so enjoying it..another question i will like us to consider is...
what do you do if your b/f's friends do not like you? do you cook for them as well if they live together or come visiting? Do you do the dishes? especially if he is begining to compare you with his friends g/f...what do you do especialy when he says it is because you do not have an approachable personality... please helpp...
Thank you! I am seeing a man who has 3 grown daughters, one of whom is the breadwinner in her family with her husband a stay-at-home husband and when my boyfriend told that daughter that he was sweeping, she exclaimed that I, his girlfriend only, should be doing "that". He told me what his daughter said and I said, "you're looking for a wife...I told him, "...when you provide for me financially (since he's talking from a traditional standpoint when it comes to me, I figured he'd get the picture), then I will provide cleaning and such but as it is now, I am yr gf and I have my own house to cook clean. He shut up. I couldn't believe his non-traditional daughter made this comment.
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