I guess I should start by specifying that we’re not first cousins, but I don’t know if we qualify as second cousins or not. His mother and my grandfather are brother and sister, in a family where there are as many aunts, uncles, cousins, and siblings as trees in a forest. The two of them are separated by fifteen years, six siblings, and enough difference in upbringing that they would often talk about how they felt more like uncle and niece than brother and sister. I think that their disparity in childhood is probably a lot of the reason why we felt it was okay to do at first, because it was barely even like they were siblings.
No
one who knows that we are a couple know that we are from the same
family. And although I often wish that I could confide in a close
friend, I am simply not ready for the kinds of questions and judgment
that would follow. They would tell me that it’s wrong, that it’s gross,
that it is unnatural, and that I’m insane. And there is a good chance
that they’re right, but the situation is just so hard to understand
unless you’ve lived in it. Although it’s true that we are blood
relatives, we only saw each other about once or twice a year. As I said
before, the difference in age between his mother and my grandfather is
enough that they are amongst the least close of all of their family, and
I am much more familiar with a lot of my other cousins than I am with
him. Even though I knew I could always see him at a family reunion or a
wedding, I never really got that “close-knit upbringing” feel that you
share with someone who you knew well in childhood. Hell, I even have
friends from elementary school that I feel more of a kinship with
because we were together for a lot of our important moments. Nick (a
fake name, of course) was only there for the big stuff.
But
I knew I loved him pretty young. We would always be the two kids at the
event who would go off and play by themselves, and when we hit our
pre-teen/teenage years, the bond that we had formed playing in the
backyard at a family gathering turned into something much more profound.
I could tell him things, he listened to me, he knew who I was in a way
that almost no one else did — even though we saw each other very rarely.
By the time I kissed him that night (I was 23), it felt like the
release of something I had been waiting for my whole life. I wanted him
to be with me, and only me, because I had always felt like I had to
share him — with my family, with the girlfriends who would ask if he was
single because they knew I could never be with him, with my parents who
would make us leave an event early and take me away from him. For once,
I had him all to myself, and I finally knew that he felt the same way
about me that I did about him. I could be honest for the first time,
even if it was only with him.
That
night, we spent about three hours frantically Googling everything from
local laws, to genetic risks, to “How to tell your family you’re in love
with a relative.” We were insane, and scared, and completely lost — but
so happy. So in love. Every day I look back on that night fondly, going
from the computer to the bed trying to find out if the way we felt was
okay, even though we knew that nothing we were going to find would
change our minds. On some level, we realized that day that we were going
to need to tell our family members. But at least, at the time, it was
something we could procrastinate on.
I
thought a long time about writing this, in a lot of ways it felt like
the first real step to telling our family, because I finally have to put
it all in words and acknowledge that it’s true. We decided, out loud
for the first time not too long ago, that we would accept the
consequences if our family could not have us around anymore. It’s a
terrifying idea, and the loss of a family as big and amazing as ours
would be a lifelong wound, but it’s something that is simply necessary.
It is legal for us to get married, and if we won’t have our parents at
our wedding, we’re going to do it some day. Nothing in the world makes
me happier than the prospect of telling Nick, in front of anyone who is
willing to watch us, that he is the love of my life. In many ways it
feels unfair that we were burdened with the same blood, that we could
have been just like any other couple around us who has the full support
of everyone they love. But if we hadn’t been born who we are, we may
have never met. And even if it costs me my family, it is a choice I am
willing to make.
876 comments:
1 – 200 of 876 Newer› Newest»Ehen????akuko ifo
yawns
linda good morning
mostbeautifullibreader
Eyah ....teeteelorpeh01@gmail.com
Hmmmmm
Hmmm una well done ooo! Mayb u people should marry
u need deliverance
hilarious
Hmmm una well done ooo! Mayb u people should marry
Lol @ telemundo.
Hmmm una well done ooo! Mayb u people should marry
Nawawo! Sameerahdabo@yahoo.com
Incest. U better put an end to it and move on with your lives separately.
Incest.
Your comment will be visible after approval
Hmmm una well done ooo! Mayb u people should marry
>>>> its not right at all, its a taboo where i come from. <<<< corcake@yahoo.com
tell them and face the consequences...
#GodblessNigeria
Abomination.God help her
That's very immoral, God will surely help u out with dis immoral act of urs. Amen.
Eeyah! Okonubby@gmail.com
Ok Bobbyferafavorirabo@gmail.com
Rubbish, different things everyday. amarachifewuaba@gmail.com
ok..
Please go ahead and while u are at it ensure you have organised your for relocation out of Naija or better yet Obituary
This is y there should be an occasion where by family I mean extended family meet deirselves...
_
_
_
DERMIEY--DERMIEYDREAL
Temiarex@gmail.com
Ok hmm. Bobbyferafavorirabo@gmail.com
#jawdrops
Hehehehehehehe! Super Story!
Rubbish, different things everyday. amarachifekwuaba@gmail.com
Need female friends 2BAFCD17
Hmmm na waoo.Bobbyferafavorirabo@gmail.com
>>>>> Its very wrong and a taboo where i come from..<<<< corcake@yahoo.com
What a silky excuse,if telemundo show cousins making out did they say u shld do it too? Better go and ask God for forgiveness
Dts really deep.
My dear I know how it feels to love, but u r doing something wrong. If only u can let it go. It is well.
Too bad
Eiyaaa nuradeeeen@gmail.com
Ha.
Mumu, u beta stop it asap.
Oya na
Toh! this one pass me o...God help you to get out of this mess you call love.
Ok
Na waaa ooo
Hmmm...gladchinyere@gmail.com
Tell ur parents n face d oracle.
Watchu tellin dem for? Mehn dat shit sounds disgustin to the ears! Y'all shud just stop the act biko but U musnt tell dem
Abominations haaa good but first you guy need deliverance and travel far from each other
Mabogunjefemi@gmail.com
Na wa
skaler say so bgn247@yahoo.com
May God forgive you ...
*** Linda's Pleasure ***
Hmmmmm! Stories that touch the hrt and melt the bombom.
Repent truly and confess to Christ.No condemnation shall be directed to you.
Na wa oooooo. Make families dey do family meeting quarterly o and make sure there is intro... Mimo
*yawns
ok I'm here..supercharge@gmail.com
With your last statement,you probably don't need advice.. Have fun!!
U don make up ur mind na, so why u dey ask us. If u people are Muslims den it is very much allowed for distant cousins to be togeda, buh I dunno bouh xtians thou, even in ur bible in d early tyms distant cousins marry each oda don't dey? Best of luck to u sha
Na wa o
Asewo
tell ur family, if they accept to marry each other but if they do not, u don't have a choice than to look for someone.
mjabdulk@gmail.com
No time to read now, later. If you want to tell then tell na
Sigh, with the high rate of divorce right now, do you think your love will withstand the test of time. Do you know how bad you will feel after telling your parents and all and you re cut off from the family, you think you are going to live happily ever after,just for reality to hit you 5years later when you are in court battling for custody of your imbecile son( genetic repercussion). Do you think it is worth it? Can't you try so hard to look for another guy, cause all those I felt something realise blah blah is bullshit with too much Hollywood.
It's better u tell your family. That's just it.
Jesus is Lord.
Am sorry for ur life
No matter how u try to justify ur relationship with him, he's still ur blood αи∂ at such, u shouldn't have had any bad/sexul tin wit him..its pure incest abeg
This world sef
Nawa o. Finnatprecious@gmail.com
Aru kwonwa
Hmmmmmm. This is weird.
datz a sad news for them.
No matter how u try to justify ur relationship with him, he's still ur blood αи∂ at such, u shouldn't have had any bad/sexul tin wit him..its pure incest abeg
Post my comment ooh,
what can i say? the society frowns on it.
Sigh, with the high rate of divorce right now, do you think your love will withstand the test of time. Do you know how bad you will feel after telling your parents and all and you re cut off from the family, you think you are going to live happily ever after,just for reality to hit you 5years later when you are in court battling for custody of your imbecile son( genetic repercussion). Do you think it is worth it? Can't you try so hard to look for another guy, cause all those I felt something realise blah blah is bullshit with too much Hollywood.
Better you tell, God forgives
Linda u dey watch APC primaries ni.
NicK
The type of shit you here
Its not good hun, u don't need to tell ur family just back out now why u still ve d chance
datz a sad news for them
This is madness. Ogishot84@yahoo.com
Mehn
Abomination
Okoroedafedestiny@gmail.com
It's aiit
Vickydarl83@gmail.com
God bless u linda
That's not cool dear, it is not too late to put a stop to it. Shit happens
WHAT OF IF SHE IS PREGNANT ,STORY FOR THE GODS DONT U NO SHE IS UR COUSIN ALL DIS WHILE HMMM
well, its the first right thing to do..... next is prayers and counselling
She is sick really(Maureennnenna@gmail.com)
Seek counsel, seek God. With God all things are possible
Incest
Okoroedafedestiny@gmail.com
WHAT OF IF SHE IS PREGNANT ,STORY FOR THE GODS DONT U NO SHE IS UR COUSIN ALL DIS WHILE HMMM
Too long and doesn't add up or make sense
Wonders shall never end
Na wa o... let me join those who are always saying "endtime is near" today. Incest is now a thing to be proud of? I feel sorry for you. The both of you.
Even if it's second cousins like u said u at stik related
Disgusting
Long and boring at some point
Men!! Is absurd, wtf!!! Better quit its crazy
>>>> well you already made up your mind, why telling? go ahead and face the consequences . <<<<< corcake@yahoo.com
Chai
Choice and responsibility
Dat is very bad nd absord, its beta u stop it now.owolabikikelomo@yahoo.com
God s watching u oooooo
Taboo
Okoroedafedestiny@gmail.com
----#AUNTYLINDAgoddaughter#
Sounds like you juist want to let it out and you r not ready to quit the relationship no matter what people think or say. Goodluck
dis life sha
What nonsense
Choi.....uwa nmebioooo.Obedon2001@gmail.com
My ears r still ringing
Abomination, olayemiok@yahoo.com
Really don't know what to call this maybe insest but who am I to put a title to it.... na una sabi jare
Is this for real?
wow wow wow
Incest! U need tobe baptized again.....
Go ahead n tell.... OYO
wow wow wow
too bad..secure.checks@gmail.com
Incest...still related
Signs of end time
-----#AUNTYLINDAgoddaughter#
Okoroedafedestiny@gmail.com
My friend take responsiblity for ur action amd don't lay it on telemundo.
Wonders shall never end
Amakadarlyn@yahoo.com
Incest...still related
How ever u choose to live....make ur choice and face d responsibilities either good or bad
Moving on
Incest...still related
This can't be real now.
Abomination, olayemiok@yahoo.com
Irritating
wow wow woow
Incest...still related
Incest...still related
Incest...still related
wonders shall never end
Vry wrong !!!
This case, odikwa risky, onismate@Gmail.com
that's crazy u have nofin to justify
......
wow!!! for one,you'd need to know for sure how to broach this subject to your family. I do know something of this nature has happened in days of old as written in the bible. pray about it.
You are heading to DOOM!
Irritating
Rubbish
Incest!!!
>>>> well you already made up your mind, why telling? go ahead and face the consequences . <<<<< corcake@yahoo.com
Pls stop what u guys is doing sis! It's abomination! Nd2k!
I KNOW I HAVE NO HOPES OF WINNING THIS MONEY THOUGH I NEED IT LIKE THE AIR I BREATH,REASONS BEING DAT SOME PEOPLE TYPE FASTER THAN FRAUDSTERS WHILE ODAS ARE ALWAYS ONLINE LIKE WITCHES, MAKING IT HARD FOR STRUGGLING STUDENTS LIKE US 2 HAVE A TASTE OF ANTY LINDA'S BLESSINGS,BUT JUST LIKE THE LAME MAN BY THE POOL OF BETHESDA THAT WAITED FOR 38 YEARS, MY DAY SHALL COME john 5: 1-18..EMANMMANUELKARNA@gmail.com
Emem2luv@yahoo.com
Just end it all... Chelvin2010@yahoo.com
some stories are so dirty that it stings to hear nkemeze12@gmail.com
hmmm...fragiletimbz@gmail.com
Try mountain on fire
Lolli4mum@yahoo.con
It happens, thers nothing new abt it
I think is better you guys say the truth and make the necessary adjustments
>>>> well you already made up your mind, why telling? go ahead and face the consequences . <<<<< corcake@yahoo.com
Punks
Repent
Wow ...harbigail@yahoo.com
Too bad
>>>> well you already made up your mind, why telling? go ahead and face the consequences . <<<<< corcake@yahoo.com
Ok o
Just pray
I KNOW I HAVE NO HOPES OF WINNING THIS MONEY THOUGH I NEED IT LIKE THE AIR I BREATH,REASONS BEING DAT SOME PEOPLE TYPE FASTER THAN FRAUDSTERS WHILE ODAS ARE ALWAYS ONLINE LIKE WITCHES, MAKING IT HARD FOR STRUGGLING STUDENTS LIKE US 2 HAVE A TASTE OF ANTY LINDA'S BLESSINGS,BUT JUST LIKE THE LAME MAN BY THE POOL OF BETHESDA THAT WAITED FOR 38 YEARS, MY DAY SHALL COME john 5: 1-18..EMANMMANUELKARNA@gmail.com
You need to reveal this to your family ASAP. It will be a good step in the right direction. God will help you out.
Normally i don't shy away 4rm reading long epistle but this time around,i had to...no matter how much u try 2tell urself it's right or tryna make it sound right with ur long write up and explanations the sad truth is that,it IS NOT and can't b justifiable in any way be him him ur 1st or 8th cousin,UR COUSIN is UR COUSIN regardless...what u guyz are doin is morally wrong and plainly stupid
Ps-linda seems uv nt been posting my comments lately or i probably hav been commenting on thin air cos lately i don't get 2c my comments...nwayz I'd just blame it on the network buh pls do look in2 it
Hmm
>>>> well you already made up your mind, why telling? go ahead and face the consequences . <<<<< corcake@yahoo.com
I KNOW I HAVE NO HOPES OF WINNING THIS MONEY THOUGH I NEED IT LIKE THE AIR I BREATH,REASONS BEING DAT SOME PEOPLE TYPE FASTER THAN FRAUDSTERS WHILE ODAS ARE ALWAYS ONLINE LIKE WITCHES, MAKING IT HARD FOR STRUGGLING STUDENTS LIKE US 2 HAVE A TASTE OF ANTY LINDA'S BLESSINGS,BUT JUST LIKE THE LAME MAN BY THE POOL OF BETHESDA THAT WAITED FOR 38 YEARS, MY DAY SHALL COME john 5: 1-18..EMANMMANUELKARNA@gmail.com
u need deliverance rubbish.ozeisusan497@gmail.com
Ouch
>>>> well you already made up your mind, why telling? go ahead and face the consequences . <<<<< corcake@yahoo.com
Pity
Una try well well,,klap 4urself!!!!
na wa o
Pls PUT A STOP TO THIS NOW COS THIS IS SO SO WRONG GOING BY OUR TRADITION ANG AS BELEIVERS. SO YOU DONT BRING A CAUSE UPON YOUR GENERATION.
The gods are not to be blamed... Smh
That's serious
Incest
See Gobe! Oya, tell ur family naa. Sebi una be adults and as such should be responsible for all ur actions.
I don talk my own.
How do you live with yourself and
Madness!
U have already made a decision, what else are u looking for in dis blog as a reply? Abeg park well!
@jessyangels4love
chigozieokochi@yahoo.com
May God forgive the both of you
You don't have fault
Wow i cnt judge cus i dnt knw wat u going tru buh ah wish u all d best nd i hpe u guys re doing d rite tyn cus i knw u can marry ur 5th level of cousin or so am nt sure dnt knw d level u guys re buh i pray God will enlighten u
Just pray
prayer is the only key.. I rest my case..
Som1 like you can even marry ur own broda! i don't care the rubbish u say here y'all are still family! U said his mother and ur grandfather are brother and sister? Do u know if it was his father dat means u and ur so-called guy wud hav same surname? Dis world don spoil finish
Hw could she so stupid like. Dat to be sleep wit. His own blood! Any ways is none of my business.
Wow!
Story
I feel ur pain but I still think its wrong
Too long to complete...... but in ratification.... u gat no excuse to sleep with ur blood
U must quit.
(God bless Nigeria)™Sp. godblessnigeria.sp@gmail.com
End everything there
Impossible
Am speechless .....wil be right bck
geez! and you have the mouth to say it. God forbid!
Impossible
Hian! Wetin person no go hear?
U'v judged urselves already, I think u already know d consequences and even said u are ready to face it so why disturb us???
wow... suicide...
God help you
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