"I'm single. I haven't had a boyfriend for five years. It's me. It's my problem. Now I'm thinking not when it's going to happen, but if it's ever going to happen at all. It's scary to imagine that maybe there'll be no husband, no baby, no wedding - and that's it. This is the point where you should be looking for older men - but the truth is, older men want younger girls. Most of my mates are married or settled down and they only know married couples. Where can I go to meet a guy? Yes, I go to parties, but you don't really meet people there. So this might be it. I may never meet someone, never have kids. I'm a happy person. I love my family, I love my job and maybe I just have to be at peace with that. Perhaps that's my fate, who knows.' she says in an interview for an upcoming edition of SHE magazine.***
I'm 29 and I haven't had a boyfriend for three years. Any advice for women like me and Lisa?
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19 comments:
linda, don't even worry about having a man, just because. You see; some of these so-called married ladies are so frustrated. When their husbands don't give them the needed attention which is most times, they tend to look and find a single lady/ies that they can put down, so that the male onlookers would applaud them and admire them for their married states. 'Otu awu na ezshi'
Not knowing that they are embarassing the living daylights out of themselves, and not the single lady/ies in question. So nne, if you are not married yet or don't have a boyfriend yet, my dear.. it is for a reason, a good one at that.
And to al the frustrated married women... ladies out there, oshi to all of you. Linda, if you like, u publish or not. It is all up to you, with all due respect.
Maybe because you've not found the one that matches all your expectations, life isnt particularly the way we want it to be, so look deeply into any one that comes your way, you'll discover they have soemthing of value that you can hold on to. But meanwhile, enjoy yourself my sister, a lot of married women are envious of you believe me, its not a bed of roses, all the best.
May be you should concentrate on other things dan dis boyfriend thing.Am sure you are not the only person dis is happening too.Concentrate on other things.
There is always an expiry dat for any problem we have.
The man will come soooooooooooooon
wow! I feel for her because she's been honest, but I know it's never too late to meet someone who will truly love and accept you for you.
Linda, you asked for advice for yourself and Lisa. Well, first of all, I'm not an expert on relationships but based on my experience working with people and my observations, it is important to be in the right frame of mind. I'll break it down:
1. You have to learn to love YOU. Completely and wholly. If you don't love yourself enough, you won't have any to give to someone else. So, first get to love and accept who you are.
2. Don't dwell too much on the fact that there is no man in your life. I know it's hard, but the more you think about, the more you feel there's is something wrong with you. And thoughts are powerful, they shape our realities so be careful what you think of yourself.
3. What kind of man do you want? I'm a firm believer in what is called 'affirmations'. You attract what you think and what you say. So what kind of man do you desire? begin to say it to yourself now even before he shows up. Look in the mirror, appreciate yourself and confess/speak out the kind of man you want in your life.
4. Last but not the least, talk to God. Tell him, he is listening. Vent, rant, scream if you want...he is listening. Don't go telling people you haven't had a bf in three years. They'll either pity you or say it's you fault. At the end of the day, the problem has not been solved.
I hope this has helped. Good luck and God bless!
Hawt.
Just keep praying cos God's time is surely the best. Our good Lord doesn't sleep. Me too dey wait upon the Lord. All our prayers shall be answered in Jesus name. Amen. This year will not pass us by.
Some believe that men are scared of single and successful women. I don't believe that. The right person would come along, regardless. I think it happens when one least expects it.
be yourself, it will surely come to you!Dont let men sense your desperation because they will come after you with bull shit
1st comment. Lesbianism is another alternative, if there is no guys who are up to the task. Seriously butch lesbos will give you all you want from a man and more sef.
Linda, let us thank God. Some married women are crying behind closed doors.
You and I are not married because it is a choice to be married or not. You want a specific type of man and just cannot find him yet.
People out there may not understand why women remain alone without lovers. Men chase me but they are not what I want.
A male friend once told me that it is better to marry what is available but I refused to do that. I don't think it will last and don't want to make a fool of my life. Maybe I will try dating agencies but beware of Mr 419.
@Linda, God dey!
you have a better chance than Lisa,just keep looking and praying,there is a special guy out there for you
Hello linda....I don't fink is bad not 2av a boyfriend @ya age....so far u are happy within & wiv all u doing....peepzzz myt b sayin u r gettin old buh I bliv ya huzby wil come @his own time which God has ordained....I'm 24 & i avnt dated any1 4d past 5yearzzz & I'm aiite wiv it cuz am happy(guyzzz wahala r 2much...*ugh*)....I believe it dependzzz on d kinda person u are really....& it aint as if guyz r not coming shey???....u just comfortable wiv life like dat abi???....anytym gurl, u are beautiful so I know God'z tym is d best alwazzz....as4 Lisa Snowdon #NoComment!!!Xoxo
When it is God's time, he will come through for you and the young lady. Marriage is a great institution but my dear, e no easy o so enjoy your single life while you can because the enjoyment of married life is a different kind though very sweet too. Work on yourself because you will attract in others the dominant qualities in yourself. It is when you are not looking that love finds you. God never set a time limit on when people are supposed to get married, it is we that put that pressure on ourselves. It is better to remain single and happy than jump into a relationship that will show you pepper and koboko!
Listen, I was single for a total of eight years and celibate as well because I just didn't want to deal with the low quality men out there and it seemed like all the good guys were married or in steady relationship. I did my prayers, fasting and continued to work on myself, hang out with my friends, family, travel, basically doing what made me happy. I did something my pastor and a family member recommended, I set my dinning table setting for two, I bought a beautiful wedding album for my future wedding pictures and I bought two baby outfits and put them all away for future use.
Mind you, I didn't have a boyfriend, talkless of children. One day, when I wasn't even in the mood to go anywhere, not a stitch of makeup, wild woman hair on my head, well guess what? I went to support a friend at her event, I met the man that became the love of my life and at 35 I got married. And I am expected a set of twins, by God's loving grace next year.
God answers prayers! Be encouraged my dear, noting no dey God no fit do.
Wow, she was very honest. Linda no worry, the man will come, Keep doing you as usual, you're the best.
interesante!
Linda, the mistake most ladies make is this "the man must approach me first". Girl friend, this is the waiting period for prayer. If God opens your eyes to know who the man is, please make the move. He may reveal to you first before the man or vice versa.
By the way, forgive me, are you sure you are really single and ready now? Hope you are not one of those ladies who are hanging out with different men including married and they want to get married. God is not mocked. He knows when you are really ready.
Also, check your attitude. Are you a snob, arrogant? Oh, no man will take this even a God sent. Every man deserves respect and want to be treated as such.
We tends to make so many mistakes when it comes to the issue of Dating or Marriage bcos this life we are living,it is two things involved & we are bound to experience the 2 side of it either Good or bad.Men & Women has lost something called Endurance in life,marriage is something ordained onto us by God & it is a sin if we wish to refrain from it. We wanted everything to be going smoothly most especially in relationship which is not possible once that human beings are not perfect.
Normally the criteria for selecting matrimonial mates are many: wealth, beauty, rank, character, congeniality, compatibility, religion, etc. The Quran enjoins Muslims to select partners who are very Religious as the 1st thing in the scale of preference b4 any other things.
"Women of purity are for men of purity, and men of purity are for women of purity "(Quran 24:26)
But nowadays,we prefer to go for Pride,Beauty,Lineage etc b4 the religion,it is only religion that can educate us how to leave peacefully among ourselves,it is only Religion that will let the Gender know thier responsiblity as husband & wife but today reverse is the case,everything is 50:50 due to adoptation of so called Western Culture.
"Trust" is the foundation of love & nobody to trust anymore bcos we have lost in spiritual aspect of our life,if we are acting according to the commandment of God,it will be easier for both Gender to trust each other bcos there is a fearness of God that prevented people to perpetrate evil deeds like furnication,lies,adultery,disobedience etc.
i would mind going out with linda if truely she is looking for a man am single and searching to if she wouldnt mind i hope we can start from somewhere accept if she has some specific,s she is looking for but i believe we could get down well am good looking and handsome so if linda thinks there are still good men out there why not leTS TALK
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Mrs Marek
Lovely story, God bless
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