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Tuesday, 20 January 2015

Ladies, 10 things you shouldn't do when you meet a new guy - By Adejoro Olumofin

This article was written by the Flamboyant Psychologist Adejoro Olumofin. Enjoy...
Ladies, 10 things you shouldn't do when you meet a new guy or new catch.
(1) Don't take your friends along with you when he invites you on a date
(2) Don't go to his house unannounced
(3) Don't ask him for money
(4) Don't compare him to your ex or talk about your ex, only if he request

(5) Don't get drunk on your first outing with him.
(6) Don't wear see through or exposing outfits on your first outings
(7) Don't bore him with all your family or personal issues
(8) Don't talk about Marriage
(9) Don't pry about the size of his pocket, his earnings or the car he drives
(10) Don't be too quick to post his picture on instagram, Facebook, (social media) etc.
Some Ladies today wonder why after a guy has shown interest in them or after 2/3 dates he disappears or doesn't return their phone calls, text bbms. I have listed some of these reasons above.

1) Don't take your friends along when he invites you on a date: Some Nigerian Ladies for some reason that is beyond me, take their friends on a date with a guy they just met. I can attest to this because it has happened to me before. No positive outcome can come out of this but some of the negatives are:
(i) The guy will be turned off
(ii) He may start liking or prefer one for your friends to you
(iii) He will never get the opportunity to know you as much as he wants because of the 3rd wheel
(iv) He may think you don't have a mind of your own
(v) He may turn you and your friends back

(2) Don't go to his house unannounced: One thing a man hates the most is for you to show up at his house unannounced or invited especially when he just met you. That's a "NO NO" because he'll just think you're a stalker or a psycho and he'll act out.. Some ladies out of emotions and lack of trust show up at a guys house, what they don't know is they are pushing him away or giving him reasons to leave.

(3) Don't ask him for Money: Some Ladies meet a guy and in less than 2/3 weeks the demands start rolling in. Please pay for my hair, buy me birkin bag for my birthday, my rent is due, or plain & simply, I need 500k or 1 million. Every guy would take off when they meet a Lady like this. They would say she's opportunistic and compare her to the ladies who are not asking them for a kobo or dime.

(4) Don't compare him to your ex or talk about your ex, only if he requests: Some Ladies compare and contrast their new guy to their old one, not only in their mind but to his face as well. They say things like my Ladi used to take me to KFC you're taking me to Mr Biggs, Jide bought me Prada for my birthday last year you're buying me Zara.. Guys hate being compared, it punctures their Ego so allow him be the Boss and take you out, don't compare or dictate terms of dates or gifts.

(5) Don't be to quick to upload his pictures on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter (Social Media) : Ladies, you just met a guy, a new flame, the relationship is at its early stages, there's still so much you don't know about him why upload his pictures for the world to see? The relationship may not even be defined yet.. By doing this, you're giving people room to influence and alter your infant relationship. Also you don't want to be like those people who have to cleanse their instagram and Facebook pages of a guys picture every 6 months because of a breakup.

(6) Don't wear see through or exposing outfits on your first date: Guys are very Impulsive and instinctive by nature, by wearing a dress or gown that's says "SEX" that's all that will be on his mind and nothing else. He won't want to hear anything about you anymore; your personality, your job, your family etc.  All he'll be thinking about is how he'll take you to his house or hotel room because you've sent him a signal saying you want sex.

(7) Don't bore him with your Family issues: Some ladies carry their personal or family problems out with them on dates, instead of making waves and progress with their new guy, they talk about how their house got burnt last week, or how their friend always borrows money or clothes from them, or how they hate their sisters or brothers.. All these are TMI (Too Much Information) Focus on him and let him Focus on you.. Don't allow extraneous variables creep in and take over your conversation.

(8) Don't talk about marriage or the future: The number one thing guys are scared of after God is Commitment or Marriage so if you just met a guy and you're already talking about marriage or children he is definitely going to take off and say you're putting him under pressure and he can't keep up.. Let him be the one to bring it up not you because he'll say you're desperate.

(9) Don't pry about his pocket, earnings or the car he drives: A friend of mine went on a Blind Date at Radisson (Lagos) to meet a Lady who his cousin had introduced him to through Instagram. He complained he had not even ordered a drink when his date asked him: What car do you drive? That was her first question.. "What do you drive?" Most guys would be offended by this and even have a negative impression about you immediately, because a guy would wonder do u like me or my car?

(10) Don't get drunk on your first outing with him: Firstly Ladies, this is for your own safety a lot of ladies have been taken advantage of because they were intoxicated. You also don't want to embarrass yourself and say or do things that you can't defend or verify.
Summary:
 
Psychologist are of the opinion that First Impression carries 80% of any encounter and that after an impression is made it is very difficult to adjust Cognitive views and Perceptions about that subject.. Ladies don't allow extraneous variables such as friends, impulses, needs, emotions, competition, social media, family pressure control your First Impression..
God Bless
#DoktorMofin

Read More Articles on Adejoro Olumofins Instagram page : @joroolumofin

218 comments:

  1. Nice one.
    $.
    $.
    @Mr Endowed via Lumia phone

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Plz that numbr 8 is crap. Abeg ignore dis fake scientist! When ur 12 or 16 u can do that! When ure 21 and above! U have to know where dt relationship is headed! U cannot be dating for datin sake! That's y pple date, den nack and split! U have to do things d right way and discuss what yall want out of d relationship! Simple

      Delete
    2. Aunty Linda I can c u are already chopping campaign money....... nice 1 u need am jor...... quick question can u take advert 4m both parties?

      Delete
    3. 10 things guy shouldn't do if dey dnt want dis... 1. dnt be a send me a pic everytym kinda nigga 2. Dnt be a wen we gonna chill kinda nigga 3.dnt be an accent forming kinda nigga 4. Dnt be. Show-off kinda nigga e.g telling me how many places u ve travelled to n ow much all ur accessories cost 5. Dnt complain or rant abt girls too much 6.dnt be a I can tke cre of u kinda nigga. 7. Stop dressing like bouncers n have arms bigger dan arnold's. 8.stop bragging abt ow many girls want u n ow many girls u cn get. 9.dnt alwys tlk bt sex n ow u gonn ravge n destroy her on bedd and lastly... dnt be a smash n run If u dnt wnt her showing at ur doorstep. if u possess diss characters y wnt she bring her friends along out of fear or ask u to sort out her ancestor's issues out of bragging n show off? Beg u Niggas should buzz off.

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    4. Lool, Mr psychologist, I've had alot of guys just walk away and I didn't do any of the above. Not a question, just saying

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    5. @lasis. Mehh. U said it all. Kuddos ahahahahhaahahhhhahaha

      Delete
    6. 😂😂

      Delete
  2. What about guys!
    $.
    $.
    @Mr Endowed via Lumia phone

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. True shaaaa.buh dey will still liv u if dey want too.chop clean mouth

      Delete
    2. Ugghhh but dude is not a psychologist though... are you guys daft??!! Please don't tell me tall are taking him seriously

      Aie dios mio

      Delete
  3. Linda just made you famous. Congrats Olumofin!

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    Replies
    1. Linda just made him famous??? Really? People and their comments sha...

      B.

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  4. True and wise talk...

    Dis r golden words of wisdom dat must b abide wit for successful date dat eventually lead to marriage.

    Nice one and good write up.

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  5. so why is he using style to model in the advise ptiuuum

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What is ptiuuum? Where you trying to hiss? If it's that then it's mtcheew.

      Delete
  6. True and wise talk...

    Dis r golden words of wisdom dat must b abide wit for successful date dat eventually lead to marriage.

    Nice one and good write up.

    ReplyDelete
  7. True and wise talk...

    Dis r golden words of wisdom dat must b abide wit for successful date dat eventually lead to marriage.

    Nice one and good write up.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So true. A lot of babes give TMI on first date cos they want to impress but don't know safe topics to discuss on , so as chatter box, they start spilling nonsence...ok let me shut up now!

      Delete
  8. U r so fucking right
    Hopefully I aint guilty of any of those trash
    I guess dats y d stay longer dan I want dem

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  9. Very true and well said bro. I just love this guy, he makes lotta sense.

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  10. Nice one brov.Very Perfect!

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  11. Would av love to agree wiv u, buh all diz doesn't guarante u dat it gon' work, I dated a guy 4 over a year, I didn't do any of diz, nd it still neva work. If it meant to be, it'll be.
    Davido's GF

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. How will it work wen u wer busy daydreaming abt being Davido's girlfrnd...golddigger!!!

      Delete
  12. Numbers 1,3 and 8 odikwa very important,especially number 1.

    ~BONARIO~says so via NOKIA LUMIA

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    Replies
    1. So she can come unannounced or wear revealing cloth bah? Stupid boi

      Delete
  13. Heard...I hope y'all have heard the man.....moving unto the next tactics on how to make money on a tender age
    ¤
    ¤¤¤¤GUTS OVER FEAR¤¤¤
    ¤
    ¤¤¤QUEENMAYA¤¤¤

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  14. Xo cool
    --------------LIB prince--------------
    --------------LIB prince-------------
    --------------LIB prince--------------

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  15. I think I need to buy the writer a very good drink. Well articulated thoughts of most men. Ladies, I suggest you take note.

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  16. a.k.a EDWIN CHINEDU AZUBUKO said...
    .
    Guy yu go enter heaven....
    *GLO BRING 3G TO KONTAGORA*
    .
    .
    ***CURRENTLY IN JUPITER***

    ReplyDelete
  17. Legal advicer

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  18. Well said Mr psycho #onelovefromsnow#

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  19. There are decent and smart ladies who don't do all of these things and still get dumped. Ladies, just pray to meet your right man at the right time; and especially when he is ready, simple!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. God bless you my Broda for this comment!!

      Delete
    2. God bless ur heart dear...... Sooooooooo true oooooo

      Delete
  20. We should all know this, I think

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  21. God Bless you for this Brethren

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  22. Adejoro Olumofin of the World.. Nice one

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  23. Number one is so true.. Nigerian Ladies are so annoying

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  24. Abeg comot make I see road. Linda take note!

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  25. Abeg comot make I see road. Linda take note!

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    Replies
    1. Really??? Well linda has taken note nd i hope she doesn't post any of your comments coz dey are not helpful

      Delete
  26. Hahahahaha.. Nigerian Babes have no chill though.. What do you drive????

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  27. U forgot one thing....DONT HAVE SEX with him

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  28. What do you drive? OMG

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  29. Why take your friends on a date??

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  30. I trust guys to say YEAH to 3 and 8, lol. Excellent writeup man.

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  31. We take our friends on dates for our own safety.. These guys can rape

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    Replies
    1. That depends on where u choose for your 1st date coz if you agree on a first date in his hotel room or house then GOODLUCK

      Delete
    2. They can only rape u if u go to their houses not in a public place. Just take his advice, it couldn't v been better said. His words all make sense.

      Delete
  32. And of course dont sleep with him....pls ladies always have dignity nd keep ur legs closed..if he wants d cookie , let him go to your parents nd pay for or it nd marry u. Ladies pls lets be wise



    *virgin of steel*

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  33. Lol @ facebook cleansing every six month. But seriously I have a friend who is about 35yrs I bet u don't have to be around her or more than an hour to get her life history. Unfortunately she doesn't know when to draw the line. Sharing the good the bad n ugly. Wish she can read this piece and learn. It's not her wayward lifestyle that is the obstacle but her mouth.

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  34. Will these girls hear?tell them o

    Apple fanboy

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  35. Will these girls hear?tell them o

    Apple fanboy

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  36. I believe in you Sir

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  37. Hahaha.. And he called out the beggars.. Nice one Bro

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  38. Why I go pay for girl rent? I be your Papa ni?

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  39. Your friend who went on blind date is stupid

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  40. ROYAL PRIESTFOOL, u read DAT within a minute? Idiot read and be informed rapist...

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  41. Your Articles are nice.. I still don't like you.. Fool!!

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  42. Erm u kinda right.but u didnt list wht they r to discuss in their first date #nothanksi'llratherbeselfmade#

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  43. Ewooo! 10 commandments.. I love this

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  44. This guy dey dress sha

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  45. May God bless you for this article. Atleast I learned one or two lessons frm it.

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  46. You make Psychology look cool.. Keep it up

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  47. Mr IJGB.. Lmaoooo

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  48. What about 10 things guys shouldn't do when they meet a new girl?

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  49. Good one but our girls are so clever my brother.

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  50. Moral lesson.... you got the money the. You earn the pussy that's what most of em are all about and guys are adjusting just fine these days

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  51. Yasssssss pls yassss

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  52. Too much content

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  53. wonderful write up & great point




    #Commenting thru Glo 4G LTE

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  54. This guy is here again..

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  55. Lmaooooooo.. Mr Linda

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  56. Girls who delete their bfs picture.. Trueeee

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  57. This idiot does not know what he is talking about.....Has he forgotten that this is 2015 and not 1980.

    Ladies listen to me as I have many guy friends and i am the baddest guy in town....

    1. Wear a very provocative dress on the first date to show him you are in with the times.

    2. Introduce him to your friends because if your friends are super attractive, he will get intimidated and step up his game in dealing with you.

    3. Talk about your ex and how successful he was. He needs to know you have high standards and he must keep up.

    4. Tease him often and say seductive things to him on the first date just to fcuk with his head. WE LOVE A CHALLENGE

    5. LAUGH LAUGH And don't take yourself too seriously.....Most guys love a woman who is so chill and can have a good time.

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  58. Well said.....abj chics listen well

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  59. I don't agree with number 2, some guys are psychos and it is good to go with a friend just to be safe. Another way around that is for the babe to pick the location herself. The rest makes perfect sense.

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  60. I experienced no.1 and I totally agree. My crush came with her friend on our first date. Unfortunately, she had a lousy attitude. I played along and when she had to visit the restroom, I collected her friends number and today, we get along just fine.

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  61. You are on point boy!!! Weldon

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  62. But sex is allowed abi, pls take your psychology somewhere else. The society is grooms pple like you. Who only wants to sample as many as possible and you make ladies valueless and shameless. U make us look weak when all we want to do is make ur sick ass happy.this advice has been flushed down the toilet.

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  63. Best post all day....ladies take note!

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  64. Please!!! The lady in question is the prize and you guys should stop giving guys reasons to be foolish. A lady can do all the things mentioned and a guy still won't be interested. The truth is, if a guy is not ready, he would look for every excuse in the book to make the girl be the problem. Enough with the "how to make a guy keep you sh*t"...with articles like this, you are simply telling the girl to be somebody else in other to get the guy's approval.

    ReplyDelete
  65. Well said

    Visit my blog

    www.glowyshoe.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  66. Don't do this, don't do that. It's all about what women should not do to keep a man - arrrrrrghhhhhhh!!!!!! What about what a man should do to keep a woman. Nonsense!

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  67. 1.Most time ladies do that for safety plssSsssss

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  68. Nice one so cool I agree, that's how a girl showed up with five of her friends and she's was meeting the guy for the first time that's so uncool

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  69. The side beards just helped d shape of ur face,wetin u know abt ladies,Linda don sell your market small. Men rules kwanu?

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  70. I won't do all those things if you will take me for a date#smiles#

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  71. Don't usually agree with this dude but on this one, cant fault a thing!

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  72. Have a friend who is guilty of number 6....I kip warning her she doesn't listen.... By the way shes still single while am happily married with ason and another on the way. Wink wink

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  73. 10000000000000%

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  74. Some of your points are valid BUT why are you advertising yourself on the sly?

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  75. Well said Brother!! Ladies, neglecting this piece of advice is at your detriment.

    Form is temporary but class always remains permanent!

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  76. Joro, what about the women who dont do any of these 10 things and the guy is still behaving like an ass? Doesnt know if he wants the relationship or wants to go back sucking on his mothers boobs? Some men cant be pleased.

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  77. NICE! She who has ears to hear, let her hear...

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  78. Is alright. #oneandonlynwa@gmail.com#

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  79. A word is enough for the wise, this is a real good talk

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  80. I concur, 100%!





    #icantcomeandgoandkillmysefjor

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  81. So true... Nice pics BTW

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  82. Well, i think the Shrink got a point.

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  83. Nah wah ooo oo. All these does not mean ooo

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  84. Waiting for d guys list. Especially those that want to smash on the first date

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  85. Well said. Ladies, take note o

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  86. @jasmine banks, u r my friend, true talk jare ( meemee ).

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  87. Okay... dat is ur own point of view though

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  88. Ladies, una don hear?! Me, I've heard oh!

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  89. Thank you... U just spoke my mind in dis write up...especially numba 1, It is d result of 3/4 of my breakups!....

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  90. yeah, he makes lots of sense abeg. God bless you.thumbs up.....
    carita4real@gmail.com say so

    ReplyDelete
  91. Dnt ask for money ke, wen most guys will be asking for sex before dat 2 to 3wks
    If I need money badly I wil ask oo. Instead if pretending n all dat, I make my own money Bt his own I wil ask n ask again
    If a guy does nt love u if u like dnt ask him for anything or even give him all u Av he will still dump u, if he loves u why nt share ur burdens wt him

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  92. Yah I agrreee sooooooooo true

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  93. I love u guy.ure d best.love dose words of wisdom Dat came from u.i believe it's gonna be noted by dose of us who are guilty of these things.thank you so much u av said we'll nd ure highly appreciated.

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  94. And Jasmine Banks, if she wants the sacred 'cookie' what should a brother do? I've met a handful of them and literally had to bail.

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  95. True talk.

    Shalom in Nigeria, Amen

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  96. Some stupid ones wil never learn.see ds anon 6.06 Pm justifying d reason for her stupidity.would u ever learn.u take Ur friends with u cos dey can rape?y go to places u can be raped.dr are so many decent places girl.a word is enough for d wise.stick to dem or drop dem and remain single. Nonsense!

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  97. @ virgin of steel.. nice one.

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  98. Hmmm Nice teaching sha. www.ikeani.blogspot.com

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  99. As if this will change most ladies out there...una weldone o but it won't work












































    All that shines is not real.

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  100. very true the one i hate most is trying to talk about ur ex, omo forget the past me i run if i hear it.

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  101. Doing all this doesn't mean d relationship is gonna work.if he is meant for u,even if you do all this,he is gonna stay.@linda is my role model!

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  102. My guy you look very good in native:) All you said is true.

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  103. Doing all this doesn't mean d relationship is gonna work.if he is meant for u,even if you do all this,he is gonna stay.@linda is my role model!

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  104. He z sooo right nd I guess every mature nd normal lady should knw dis.

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  105. We don hear.

    ~@iamjbankz SA to President Jonathan 2015~

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  106. I so disagree with #3, when u dont ask, nothing for u

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    Replies
    1. Na sooo.dem go happy sef.some of dem if u dnt ask dey won't giv u at all...ojofrrryyy

      Delete
  107. Well I can agree with some of these things you said.my friend has been dating a guy over six months, the guy has not even told her anything or what he feels about their relationship. My friend doesn't even have clue what their relationship is all about.

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  108. Am I the only one that noticed all d grammatical errors? Well he kinda made sense....I thought everyone knew all of these already. Anyways. ..Exams on my mind. MEN can wait.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So u r here coz u want 2 take ur time to analyze err abi...D devil don sock cake for u

      Delete
  109. When will somebody advise guys on how to keep a lady? It's so annoying how guys, especially the foolish ones are made to feel on top of the world because ladies are expected to please and defer to them.

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  110. Laulipo u thank u 4 explaining to us how poor u are. With all d advice u are still hell bent on taking money on d first date? Na wa

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  111. Nice points there...

    http://www.babiousblog.com/2015/01/a-reply-to-adejoro-olumofin-on-10.html

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  112. Celestina Anthony20 January 2015 at 23:14

    Tell them ooooo

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  113. Celestina Anthony20 January 2015 at 23:14

    Tell them ooooo

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  114. This dude is speaking for himself o. If a guy likes u, ask him about marriage on a first date, talk about ur fam problems, talk about your ex all you want, he will still stay and make you know he is for real. On the other hand, if he is d confused type who always thinks "i will meet someone better", he will always find a fault. These rules dont mean much if you find your "true love".

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  115. All these rules DO NOT apply if
    A)He is married
    B)Pressuring you for sex from day 1.

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  116. Biko make I hear something... There is no hard and fast rule to any relationship... Adejoro your personal experience is not enof for u to come up with these...

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  117. Meeting the Mr Right is 70percent luck,25percent beauty,5percent actions. So you may do all this things and still not be in a good relationship. Therefore pray to be lucky, to find the right man at the right time..

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  118. what of guys. don't ask her for sex or prove her love to him. it is no longer a mans world. we both share it now.

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  119. point taken!!!

    missvee

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  120. Boss tell them abeg!!!! Ike agwula

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  121. Boss tell them abeg!!!! Ike agwula

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  122. nice write up guy.ladies u na hear

    ReplyDelete

Disclaimer: Opinions expressed in comments are those of the comment writers alone and does not reflect or represent the views of Linda Ikeji.

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