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Friday 26 December 2014

Should married women cut off their single friends? - Adejoro Olumofin asks

Article written by flamboyant psychologist -  Adejoro Olumofin aka "Doktor" Mofin
Let's talk Volume 1. (Should married women cut off their single friends?). Psychometrics has shown that some married women cut off their single friends. This has ended long term friendships, even with siblings, caused envy, strained childhood relationships and created bitter rivalries.
Should married women have only married friends?  Some married women who have cut their friends off claim that :

(1) Their focus has changed and they no longer have similar interests or anything in common with their single friends
(2) They don't want to get tempted back into single ladies behavioural pattern or lifestyle such that they develop a level of respect for being married
(3) They don't want their single friends close to their husbands because of temptation on both sides as well as keeping boundaries of respect for their spouse..
(4) The believe that single ladies are jealous of them and could therefore be a threat to their marriage in one way or another
(5) Disapproval of certain friends from the spouse
(6) Some friends have always opposed and still oppose their marriage and are always looking to pick a fault in either the spouse or the marriage
(7) The feeling of superiority over single friends from the idea that there is somewhat a level attained above them
(8)Protection from talking to friends about their marriages and giving them the gun to use against them

Are these reasons valid and true?
This does not apply to all married women obviously but this is a very popular phenomenon in Nigeria..
There is no fixed solution or stand on this because what works for Mrs "A" may not work for Mrs "B", this is relative to individuals. Everyone knows what works for them, the type of friends they have and the type of husbands they have. Some friends may have Ill motives and some friends may not, some husbands may chase your friends some husbands may not.
Let's make sure what ever decision we make is based on best interest for the marriage to work and for all parties but always beneficial to us. 
Also make sure to put facts into consideration . I.e the history you have with some friends and your husbands personality. If you have any friend that has a history of snatching your boyfriends then you clearly don't want her near your husband. Same If you have friends who are always in competition with you or backbiting you etc
Don't cut your friends off because people are doing it. Rather establish there a balance between all relationships including family, friendship and marriage.
Read more articles on Adejoro Olumofins instagram page : @joroolumofin
Also contact him on : olumofinj@yahoo.com

141 comments:

  1. Should married men cut off their single friends? - Cute G asks.

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  2. They could Cutt off some who would influence the marriage Wrongly..

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    .Disclaimer:: Raise Your Words, Not Your Voice. It Is Rain That Grows Flowers, Not Thunder..

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  3. Its natural, once anybody gets married he or she will always cut off some friends in order to concentrate in his or her marriage.

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    1. It should be like that, you only cut off those that bring negative energy and minus that just keep ur friends

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  4. No women shouldn't cut off Becos they're married...friendship has nothing to do with marital status...just like men can't stop womanizing even when they're married..

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    1. Keep ur frds but stop flirting with the opposite sex or revealing too much of ur union

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  5. Rubbish ....this psychopath is seeking for the attention so bad......psychologist my ass....stop showing us ur pixs and go get a job

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  6. Rubbish ....this psychopath is seeking for the attention so bad......psychologist my ass....stop showing us ur pixs and go get a job

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  7. nope..dont think so. Just keep marital issues off your discussions with them.

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  8. Am of the opinion that a married woman should av less of single friends esp of the male gender, female single friends can stil be kept, however, a married woman should know the type of her single friends worth keeping esp for her marrital security. Male friends are no go area except they are married and the husband knows them well. Having married female friends can help understand and overcome some marrital issues that might come up than singlfriends. My thoughts tho.

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  9. They shouldn't. Depends on what they gain from the friendship.
    $.
    $.
    @Mr Endowed via Lumia phone

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  10. Ood conclusion. Personally, I'd adcvice my wife 2 stay away any friend that be a bad influence in her life.

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  11. If you just leave ur friend cos you are now married, ur friend would feel ALONE, which might have some physiological effect
    $.
    $.
    @Mr Endowed via Lumia phone

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  12. Before,i used to distance myself from my married friends for fear of problems.But the one i met here changed my perception.She's super cool,a married friend with a difference.I agree with this flamboyant psychologist intoto.

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  13. Cutting dem off doesn't really matter. It depends on type of frnds u move arnd wit.

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  14. To me I don't think keeping a single friends should be an issue, some single's re good while some re bad, because we all know's that there is a word which goes, show me Ur friend and i'll tell u whu u re.#THAT AKWA IBOM BOY#

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  15. Not necessary....friends are friends forever...that's why we have BFF.
    ¤
    ¤¤¤GUTS OVER FEAR¤¤¤
    ¤
    ¤¤¤QUEENMAYA¤¤¤

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  16. The real truth is some single ladies don't like hanging out with their married friendz bcoz they wouldn't want to be too 9c to d extent dat their friend's husband will start havin second thought on his marriage or too razz for d husband to put d wife in a situation of 'choose between me n ur friendz'

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  17. Pls read/share my post on this http://anuoluwapoo.blogspot.com/2014/07/married-woman-syndrome.html?m=1 Thanks

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  18. No.... Although wen ur married u ve to cut down some excesses and tink lyk a married person ....but U still need ur single frenz around 4 so many reasons

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  19. Birds of the same feather flock together!!

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  20. I don't think they should, except the single friend have this character that will jeopardise her relationship.

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  21. Don't think so ,not necessary staying away from ur old friends.

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  22. I believe it depend on their kind of friends, there are some friends you just can't leave even if you're married

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  23. I get u doc Mofin, but these days mmmmmm...anyways I didn't want to cut my friend off until one day when my hubby went to tickle her but I saw them and he apologised that he meant no harm to my friend. I only told my friend to come to my house whenever I invited her and not unannounced, it's not my friend's fault but I just have to be careful u know. so ladies and women, cutting ur friends off depends on u. I'm a very liberal person...I no like wahala kia kia.

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  24. Yes, like he says, what works for Peter, might not work for Paul, the trick is finding the correct fit.

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  25. This is very shallow for married women to do this. How can you cut off your friend, just because you are married. What happens when you divorce ?

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  26. Doktormofin nice article.

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  27. This is my favourite of all articles of Doktormofin.

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  28. Olumofin Adejoro hot psychologists.

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  29. Cutting away from your single friends doesn't make sense at all...

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  30. Fuck single ladies. I want married ones

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  31. I will say it makes sense for married women to cut off single friends, for reasons best known to the married women.

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  32. Single or Married. Find loyal friends not home wreckers.

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  33. Sensible write up.

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  34. it would be the best is married women will abstain from single ladies


    GET THE WORDS YOU NEED TO SUCCEED THIS COMING YEAR

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  35. Psychologist/ Model.. Can't hate another man's hustle. Nice packaging bros, all na settings.

    Osquare101@gmail.com

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  36. Well i think once a woman is married her sole aim should be protecting her home front freinds and other things should take a back sit

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  37. As for me, I still keep most of my frnds n most r single. I kn hw to balance btw husby n frnds so derz no friction

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  38. I naturally don't like my girls having female friends very close. Same will go for marriage. My wife won't keep close relationship with any woman (not just single ladies).

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  39. The married women who do that were either bad (wild) as singles and had bad friends as well or they don't have good and useful single friends. Some friends, whether married or single, are invaluable. If you are married and have such, you sure won't discard her.

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  40. Most people feel that way but respecting everyone's feelings and putting facts into consideration should be a better way to decide

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  41. He made sense. Very common with the ladies.

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  42. Should single women keep troublesome married friends once they become a pain in the ass after saying I do?

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  43. i dont want to read your shit but if i mistakenly find you near my wife or any of my family members wife just count yourself a dead man.I will blow your skull.

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  44. Well,i dnt think they should.

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  45. Am not married and any single friend dt cuts me off cos she got married isnt really my friend.
    And the truth is when d whole euphoria of being married blows over, dey will come back. Marriage is a blessing not a thing of status. How pple handle it depends on their individuality.

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  46. It happens naturally that wen u get married ur single friends don't come that close to u like bfore

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    Replies
    1. Linda, this guy must really be paying you o. At least he listened and changed his attitude and tone in his write-ups, especially towards women.

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  47. Should married men cut of their? if that be the case.

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  48. I have never cut off my single friends..agreed, interests and focus have changed but, I relate with dem on a different level. Like adejoro said, a balance can be created. It's very possible to be married and still have ur single friends

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  49. I still have single friends but i set limits. Though the reasons r true for some marriages some women learnt d hard way. And who says keeping married friends solves the problem? Some married women still fuck their friend's husbands. Why is he looking sideways in all his pictures?

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  50. I like the conclusion..."...put your facts into consideration...."
    Btw,he's goodlooking.

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  51. Thank you! I ain't cutting nobody off! Bless

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  52. Okay! I am hurt now. Is this guy really a bastard? Whats with all the pictures of himself? How desperately vain and self indulging can one be? Get over yourself Mr-no-other-profession-i-must-die-with-psychology! Tsk!

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  53. Mr Dapper..,wa GBA yi

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  54. Well, true but sad, not all single friends should be cut off but definitely some friends needs to be cut off. As a married woman I believe that having strings of friends is not advisable in your best interest. Too many friends will be a distraction to your home. Have a few quality friends both singles and married. Just be viigilant.

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  55. Mr Olumofin pls reply your email Sir..

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  56. Words of wisdom brotherly.. Ride on

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  57. This is so True! Naija women act like marriage is the end of the world.. Smhhhh

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  58. I disagree Mr Olumofin

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  59. Proud of you.. Keep them Coming

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  60. Man Crush.. Hehe

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  61. Pls write more about guys.. Thank you

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  62. Lmaoooo! This guy like wahala sha

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  63. I wish I could call out names.. This is true abeg

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  64. He's fine sha.. Is he straight?

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  65. Wise words.. One sided though

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  66. Mr man.. My friends haven't cut me off yet o.. Thank you

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  67. Brains and Looks.. I'm getting you.. Vain shaaa

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  68. Hmmmm.. This Nigeria sha

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  69. Number 3 and 4 reason.. Gbammmm

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  70. This is dead.. I didn't and won't cut my friends off

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  71. Practice what you preach

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  72. Please tell me how married women and single ladies have anything in common?

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  73. Adejoro my Instagram Crush.. He slays for life

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  74. Linda I see you have a new friend.. Hmmmm

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  75. This is war.. Ghennn ghaunnnn

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  76. How is this my business bros?

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  77. Superficial!! Smhhh

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  78. This guys pot belly article was tacky and narrow minded.. But this is sensible.. My friend started acting somehow after her marriage..

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  79. Thank you for this..

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  80. Doro Super Mofin.. Lmaoooooo

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  81. This guy just wants to fuck

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  82. LOL.. Mr Everywhere all over the media

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  83. I disagree!!!!! Facts pls

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  84. Please another controversial article.. Yaminggggg

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  85. I'm happy we have a man speaking for this ladies.. Bless you

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  86. Your website sir?

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  87. Loooll.. Mr Flamboyant. We know ya fine, less pictures

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  88. Do you have a publicist Sir??

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  89. Omo Politician... Eku le de

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  90. I'm happy for you Joro..

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  91. Hahahahahah.. Women be so sensitive

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  92. Nicely done.. Joro Mr loud.. Lmaooooo

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  93. This guy won't stay in one place.. Bella Naija, everywhere.. Mr Dappernesss

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  94. More Articles plssssss

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  95. Congratulations Bro.. Bless

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  96. Keep Going!!!

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  97. Mr Pot Belly.. Shallow Shallow

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  98. Lmaoooooo.. This guy shaaa

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  99. I saw this guy and his brother at MMR.. Fashion kings

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  100. Spartans!!!!!! Mad men

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  101. Some singles are not good at all, they want to know everything about u n ur family. Married women should mind their homes, singles look for ur own simple

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  102. It depends on how her single friends influence her, if it negative, then yes she should cut off

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  103. It depends on how her single friends influence her, if it negative, then yes she should cut off

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  104. A single friend cut me off.

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Disclaimer: Opinions expressed in comments are those of the comment writers alone and does not reflect or represent the views of Linda Ikeji.

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