Today, Monday December 1st, is World AIDS day, and I'm celebrating my resolve to live with this damn virus all these many years without letting it define who I am. Every journey I take, every picture of me you see, and every new challenge I take on are all huge reminders that I must never stop living my best life. So, I decided to share my journey with you today. Honestly, I don’t know what exactly you are dealing with but I’m writing you this to hold tight to your dream. Here's a quick sketch of my journey from the first day I tested positive, 15 years ago. My upcoming book tells the full story.
1999.
After three years of different pains and minor illnesses, I was
encouraged by my best friend and Professor Soyinka, an HIV specialist,
to go get tested so I could face my fear. I had just resumed work as a
Copywriter at McCann. I’d rather not know. I was working on Coca Cola,
and I would rather live in the joy of that dream. It was that point when
you assured yourself this was only a lie from the pit of hell. I had
not been a ‘bad boy,’ I would assure myself.
1999.
I tested, and it came back positive. I blamed everyone but myself. I
wanted to end my life immediately. Trust me, I did try a few things.
Then I called on God. I told God to change the status because it didn't
look good on him. I sang. I fasted. I gave offerings. Prophet offerings.
I died several times, but I didn't die. I was always back to myself. I
came up with a few pseudo coping skills, but I was always depressed. The
picture of HIV back then was very gory, and I was wasting away.
2004.
I realized I didn't die yet. My flesh had not fallen off. My heart was
still beating. I still liked rice and pepper stew. I still had early
morning erections - and not just in the early mornings. Shouldn't I be
dead by now? I began to question everything I ever knew.
2006.
I had a local operation for tonsillitis, and it brought my immune
system to level zero. I was infected by everything you could name. But I
was so happy that I was going to die finally. Wouldn't it be nice to
die just like that? Unfortunately, I did not die. I was bedridden for
four months and was forced to live by myself. It was there that my
Exodus happened. I realized for the 1st time that the real death is when
we refuse to live out our full potential. Death is not a physical
thing. It is an emotional thing. When we stop living. When we stop
laughing. When we stop learning. When we stop crying. Or feeling. So I
couldn't wait to get out of the hospital. There, I started the anti-HIV
medication. (Trust me, it doesn't kill as I had feared)
2007.
I started living and loving myself. As a creative person, I created
Orange Academy to start teaching people how to find their creative self.
Love themselves. Tell compelling stories. I put all my life into it.
Then, I started to undo all my pseudo coping skills. Oh, I had tons of
them. Like getting married, wanting people to accept me, being the 'yes'
man to Ministers of God - something I did in times past to assure
myself I was doing 'God's will.' I stopped sending my money to Trinity
Broadcasting Network (TBN) and started investing it on people I could
see around me. Little did I realize that God didn't send me to do
anything to gain his favor or search for him. God had never been lost. I
was meant to find myself and live my authentic life. Lift people up.
Fight the oppression around me. I started spending time with myself. I
started working out at the gym. I started to travel to enjoy the
universe.
2008
- 2010. I looked in the mirror, and I saw a better me. A younger me. A
healthier me. No more lies. At Orange Academy, we started the ART OF
POSITIVE THINKING and started to use our arts and money to assist people
living with debilitating diseases or social conditions. I took those
layers of lies off my soul. I started writing my memoir - my full story
as a preacher boy trying to find God who art in heaven! [ THE EXODUS
coming out next year ]
2014. November. I had an appointment with my doctor in Maryland, USA, and he asked me:
'What's your secret?' All your medical tests are amazing. We tested for everything possible. No new infections or conditions. Blood work is excellent. Nothing at all to worry about. Perfect health. Just that you are still HIV+.'
‘Oh really?’ I said. ‘I thought that had disappeared.’
‘ Well, it’s still there, sadly. I hope Science gets the cure someday soon.’
'What's your secret?' All your medical tests are amazing. We tested for everything possible. No new infections or conditions. Blood work is excellent. Nothing at all to worry about. Perfect health. Just that you are still HIV+.'
‘Oh really?’ I said. ‘I thought that had disappeared.’
‘ Well, it’s still there, sadly. I hope Science gets the cure someday soon.’
We
both laughed and then I fought back a little tear in my eyes. This dude
doesn't know how grateful I am for HIV. Thank God for HIV. I wish I
never had it, but Lord I did! It made me run after myself. Maybe I would
never have understood myself; that no one can save us but us. Maybe I
would never know the refreshing power that loneliness can bring when we
embrace our broken self.
Here's
what I want you to take away: don't end your dreams just because you
are presented with bad news along the way. Remember, HIV doesn't kill
anymore; it's ignorance that kills. Use that bad news to ride onto your
next phase. It will be tough. I won't lie. Don't be afraid to live
vulnerably. It's empowering. Empower yourself by loving yourself. Find
yourself. Give yourself to people without expecting anything in return.
If you are a Faith person, keep living your Faith in love for humankind.
Empty yourself and accept to be filled with kindness from others.
Believe me, there are still angels out there to lift you up.
*NOTE:
Potentially I cannot infect anyone with HIV since my viral load went to
undetectable since 2008. Nevertheless, I still advise that you take
precaution with sexual partners as an HIV+ person, so they don't infect
you with STDs. If you have not tested, know your status. It's
liberating. Starting an HIV medication now doesn't only protect your
loved ones but can make you live even longer than people without HIV.
Wow really inspiring, handsome man
ReplyDeletewow.....and he is looking so good...All Thanks to GOD
DeleteWas quite long to read shaa
ReplyDeleteFor Christ sake!!!, how can such an inspiring story be so long to read? How do you cope at school?
DeleteNaaa so naaa
DeleteDid she say she went to school? She obviously didn't.
DeleteHaba
DeletePlease help me ask her o. Some people can be damn lazy!
DeleteLong keh?
DeleteEhya! Kpele my fine bobo #onelovefromSnow#
ReplyDeleteLol @ snowfix , Pele doesn't have K in it ..... His write up is very captivating and I will totally buy his book! Thumbs up Kenny :)
DeleteGod dey ooh.
DeleteLong live LIB™
So touching. It is well with you. Cute guy.
DeleteThis kind of honesty is rare. I would totally marry this guy if he asked me.
DeleteI also luv the fact that he's optimistic. Optimism and diligence is my driving force.
Glad this virus is under control now
ReplyDeleteLol... Abi U don use style knack am? Sorry oh! Mouth sealed
DeleteLoool @ ur comment!
Deleteread this story since morning na maybe nt dis blog. linda if u like dnt post my comment cos am nt boniro naggs or onyx godwin ooo
ReplyDeleteI thank God for his life.
ReplyDelete~BONARIO~says so via NOKIA LUMIA
Hey boo hw r u? Lol thank God 4his life
DeleteThis fine boy ...is well
ReplyDeleteThis fine boy... For your mind ? haha
DeleteIt's well or it is well. Speak English please
DeleteHe try.
ReplyDeleteInspiring msg
DeleteAmakadarlyn@yahoo.com
Wow nice one from him. But God can heal him perfectly. So many untold story hanging. God bless u more.
ReplyDeleteWow! God is good indeed
ReplyDeleteBtw, Linda wetin happen wey you de load comments fast today? New month resolution? Sha keep it up.
ReplyDeleteThat's brave. God bless u
ReplyDeleteIt is well with your soul my brother.
ReplyDeleteThank God for ur life bro.
ReplyDelete⌣̊┈̥-̶̯͡»̶̥♡thanks ⌣̊┈̥-̶̯͡»̶̥
see handsome guy wif hiv
ReplyDeleteAnd who told u HIV is only for d ugly people? Anybody can get it...we all at one point in ourselves made mistakes but d grace of God saw us through, just live a careful and positive life and pray u don't fall a victim..
DeleteIgnorance..ode
DeleteWhen ever dem hear say person get HIV their mind goes to sex, sex is NOT the onlyway a person can get infected.
DeleteThank God for his life.
ReplyDeleteYour comment will be visible after approval
Alloy,u for be among d 100k december winners if to say u no use d 20k wey u win last month share recharge crd for d "other" side. U still even come add that particular blogboo to ur name. Now u see what ur foolishness cost u? Ntoor!!!!!!
DeleteNne Aloy just fuck up. Dis is lik winning in PDD and went to APC and pay tithe. Aloy next time, pls dont do d right thing at d wrong time ok.
DeleteBrave heart
ReplyDeleteInspired! Motivation!
#Commenting thru Glo 4G LTE
wow so inspiring!
ReplyDeletewow!
ReplyDeleteso hansome
very inspiring. Thank you
Wow na wa o
ReplyDeleteInspiring
Fine boy
one lesson:never allow your challenges be an obstacle to your desire/passion.
ReplyDeleteoh wow
ReplyDeletevery inspiring
thank you
God help us all
ReplyDeleteso touching..THANK GOD FOR HIS LIFE
ReplyDeleteWhat a handsome man....thank God for his life...*****QUEENMAYA*****
ReplyDeleteWow!
ReplyDeleteOne lesson:never alow your challenges to nbecome an obstacles to your greatness/passion/desire.
ReplyDeleteVery inspiring.. Thank God for him.
ReplyDeleteGod have mercy
ReplyDeleteThank God for keeping him
ReplyDeleteone lesson:never allow your challenges be an obstacle to your greatness/passion/desire.
ReplyDeleteIf you add Jesus to your life Hiv/Aids is just nothing.. It is well. Isaiah 54:17. BishopDammy#
ReplyDeleteLINDA Please include OSINANL in the 100K
ReplyDeleteBegi- begi oshi!
Deleteinspiring is nt easy really but i love his courage.
ReplyDeleteHandsome dude
ReplyDeleteGee, that was heartwarming!!
ReplyDeleteItz not a death sentence I can attest to dat! Though itz not easy Letting the world knw who yuh are coz of the Stigma.
ReplyDeletereally inspiring . a lot of ppl will be encouraged by this story
ReplyDeleteTHANK GOD FOR YOUR LIFE
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeletea proof that HIV no dey show for face
Is Genevieve Nnaji Engaged?
Is Genevieve Nnaji Engaged?
Handsome dud,God luvs u ok? Shantelkingsley@gmail.com
ReplyDeleteGud of him...pedrotoki80@yahoo.com
ReplyDeleteWow
ReplyDeleteHiv is real..go know ur status today
ReplyDeleteYes very true indeed
DeleteAnd inspiring story
DeleteAwoooo! C fine boy! Don't Worry God wil heal u in Jesus name amen!
ReplyDeleteVery inspiring story. Thank God for his life o. Fine dude, God can still heal him though...
ReplyDeleteHummmmmmmmm
ReplyDeleteI can date and marry this guy i swear down.
ReplyDeleteAnd yesss,i am HIV negative
He is REAL!!!
THIS is a man.
kenny badmus are you single? Do you live in Nigeria?
If so send an email to oren_ishii78@hotmail.com
Lol... You fake pass! Na so e easy?? If I hear
DeleteSorry he is gay
DeleteHe's handsome and has great potentials. Any woman would not hesitate to settle with him.
DeleteOluwa i bless ur name
ReplyDeleteVery inspiring, keep going bro
ReplyDeleteWaoh this is so inspiring n touching, God bless u always
ReplyDeleteNice testimony
ReplyDelete'don't end your dreams just because you are presented with bad news along the way. ' I am touched by this, glad you're alive impacting lives.
ReplyDeleteIt takes lot of courage for him to do what he is doing.
ReplyDeletetouching!
ReplyDelete#GodblessNigeria
Very touching indeed but the stigma that goes with it is really bad. wishing him de best.
ReplyDeleteI'm out. ***CATCH ME IF U CAN**
Very inspiring message, he has been able to give hope to HIV positive people. Such a handsome young man.
ReplyDeleteThank u for sharing Kenny....God bless you or I forgot you don't believe in him anymore! #SeunLondon
ReplyDeletea.k.a EDWIN CHINEDU AZUBUKO said...
ReplyDelete.
see as the guy fat pass me self.. thank God for money o...
*GLO BRING 3G TO KONTAGORA*
.
.
***CURRENTLY IN JUPITER***
The most important thing is to love yourself
ReplyDeleteMet this guy two years ago and I would have sworn he was as healthy as a horse and as clean as a whistle. it is honestly brave of him to do this, knowing how close minded we can be about things like this.
ReplyDeletei have been commenting but cant see my comments....whats happening...how can i comment on lib
ReplyDeleteSo touching story. I pray God show us the cure of this virus.
ReplyDeletetaiwo.bolaji81@gmail.com
Hmm...he's got courage I'll give him dat
ReplyDeleteAwww so touching
ReplyDeleteWoooow!! This is very touching, so one can still live their life to the fullest even with testing positive to HIV.......#soinspired
ReplyDeleteSo so inspiring...
ReplyDelete"no one can save us but us"
ReplyDeleteI'm happy he is living his life.
Very inspiring.... just the right words I needed for such a horrible day as this.... #nevergiveup
ReplyDeleteNd dis guy jus saved a soul.. iv been soo depressed.. God bless you
ReplyDeleteBaba Kenny, there r people born to be touch bearers. U hv been brave for others.One luv from an Orange alumni
ReplyDeleteWow his words re like gold
ReplyDeleteVery touching. Happy he found his exodus. Keep touching lives.
ReplyDeletei am deeply touched by his words.
ReplyDeleteGod will help u very soon u will testify!!
ReplyDeleteLibers. Who said the virus is now under control or do you mean in the writer? It is raging out there decimating the poor and rich alike. So let us not for one day think that it is over. It is also fueling the stealing with impunity phenom we have come to live with in Nigeria. People need the money to survive. First thanks to the author for sharing his story so gracefully and for the p.s. note. That should have been in BIG BLOCKS because the framing is a killer. It is not about spreading it to others. Its about staying alive. USE A CONDOM. Better still, abstain and find a higher purpose.
ReplyDeleteMy best bit of the story "I realized for the 1st time that the real death is when we refuse to live out our full potential"... I wish you God's Strength
ReplyDeleteSO INSPIRING.
ReplyDeleteSo inspiring...
ReplyDeletenyc one.....
ReplyDeleteYes, discover urslf n live ur lyf. Tnk God fr u shaaaa
ReplyDeleteHope you didn't infect anybody sha. It is true HIV is not a death sentence.
ReplyDeleteBut wait oooo, na his recent pik b dis or. His formal pik wen he hasn't contact d disease???lindodo ans mi ooooo
ReplyDeleteAm tired of dis ma commnt will b visibl aftr approval, bettr post ma commnts ooooo
ReplyDeleteAnd I had to shed a tear
ReplyDeleteAm tired of dis ma commnt will b visibl aftr approval, bettr post ma commnts ooooo
ReplyDeleteSo what are u insinuating chikaeze? Pls take ur jealous comment else where.
ReplyDeleteHe is brave to open up, good thing is its not like Ebola, one day i know it will be history.
ReplyDeleteWow! Inspiring
ReplyDeleteThis is why you should start your own BLOG today
More blessing for him
ReplyDeleteVery Inspiring. God bless you.
ReplyDeleteBeing the YES MAN to ministers-something I did in time past to assure myself I was dooing God's Will........hmmmn
ReplyDeleteThis article is really inspiring
Wouderful
ReplyDeleteWish his healed already
ReplyDeleteWaoh it is well wit ur soul
ReplyDeleteSo inspiring. Love u man. God keep u
ReplyDeleteInspiring and uplifting. Stay blessed.
ReplyDeleteVery brave and handsome dude. Wishing him more healthy years ahead.
ReplyDeleteLovely piece, Hope everybody with the virus could live like this....hmmmmmm
ReplyDeleteThis is highly inspiring. I hope a lot of youths would take this opportunity to get themselves tested. I have been having regular test for HIV and Hepatitis for the past 10 years and it is good you know your status and save your partner and mankind.
ReplyDeleteThank God for his life.. So inspiring....
ReplyDeleteInspiring! And I pray that you become HIV negative before the end of the year in Jesus Name. Amen.
ReplyDeleteGod bless you plenty plenty!
Good looking man
ReplyDeleteSo inspiring and he's such a cutie....I pray u get d cure someday. BV's, knw ur status
ReplyDeleteGOD BLESS YOU
ReplyDeleteWooow This is so inspiring!!! Such a handsome dude.God is going to heal you perfectly! In Jesus name. Amen.
ReplyDelete*Touching*
ReplyDeleteHi
ReplyDelete*sobs* this is very inspiring... continue to b strong the lord is your strength adaokoro777@yahoo.com
ReplyDeleteGod be with you brother...
ReplyDeleteVery touching. ..great courage
ReplyDeleteAm inspired......no matter d situation just live ur life
ReplyDeleteWow this is so inspiring, i once worked as an IT student at a clinic and i can tell what this people go through, so good to see he took it in positive light
ReplyDelete*Mr Double*
God bless u more for sharing this....it will help others living with d virus n encouarge them too. Am hapi u are strong enof to overcome d truma. God is ur strength n i pray oneday it will change to HIV negative......just be nice n gud to people OK. God bless u!
ReplyDeleteDiva-chilee
It's quite touching as well inspiring, I do believe that one has to be optimistic in our daily dealings,cos What we hear sometimes affects us but doesn't make us
ReplyDeleteWow!
ReplyDeleteNice one i think he still looks cool too
ReplyDeleteThat's pretty nice to hear. At least a source of encouragement to those that feels that HIV is a dead sentence.
ReplyDeleteBryte Tablet from Konga.Com
Courage is the word
ReplyDeleteWow. God bless and keep you.
ReplyDeleteInspiring story...so hapi his VIRAL load is undetectable..whc means he takes his drugs religiously..nice one
ReplyDeleteOur mind set is who we are....d Lord is ur strenght cutie..
ReplyDeleteInspiring!
ReplyDeletereally inspiring. I believe God can still heal him.....*now deviating a lil* i think 'bishop dammy' deserves a 100k too. my thought tho.
ReplyDeleteHmmn, dis is very touching and scary... May God heal you IJN *Flora*
ReplyDeleteThis shows there is hope for people living with HIV/AIDS. It is more manageable to the oda disease
ReplyDeleteI hv fallen inlove with him, that is xo inspiring #mz jenny#
ReplyDeleteI think am in love with dis guy! Is he married? D lord will keep him and I believe God will help him live his life to d fullest
ReplyDeleteMy brother, God is @work in your life. I can only perceive God's glory and manifestation. It's God all the way. Keep the Fire burning!
ReplyDeleteThis story has really lifted me. I am not hiv positive,but my spouse is.I ve been depressed once in a while, but God has been good to us. This is the seventh year. Is God not awesome praise his holy name.Thank you Linda
ReplyDeleteAm so touch, I would love to share dis 1daful story but hw do I go about it?
ReplyDeleteThis is well and good, but these stories sugar coat the ugly side of HIV/AIDS. When the medications stop working, it kills torturously. People are not reminded enough of the brutality of this illness. That's why you have women above saying they want to marry him in spite of his status. HIV/AIDS is still a killer disease.
ReplyDeleteVery inspiring testimony. I found out about my status too 3 year ago and I was going to kill myself. I never got sick, I looked even healthier than someone who is negative during testing and doctors were even amazed. I dint even believe my own eyes, I still think it's film trick up till today but trust me it's real. We just need to stop the stigma and learn to love and accept and stop d amebo about someone's medical condition around and make casualty happy, live in peace and happiness. GO get tested. HAPPY WORLD AIDS DAY to y'all weather you are living a positive live or you are negative.
ReplyDeleteHmmmm so inspiring.
ReplyDeleteHmmm! Lesson: u r ur limitation n nothing else! Inspiring story! God bless. U bro.
ReplyDeleteYeah! It's World Aids Day. I am positive as well. I have been living with this virus since 2006.(8yrs) now. I feel your pains and I had similar or worse experience because I am a lady. Well, it's been by His Grace. Go get tested and live a healthy life. Luv ya. Candy
ReplyDeleteFirst time comment....Inspiring story and linda pls post it I need the giveaway badly
ReplyDeletePlease don't infect others with the virus biko....joooor ooo
ReplyDeleteHeart felt story.
ReplyDeleteWow, I salute you.
ReplyDeleteVery soon a cure will be out, i am sure of that. God bless you bro
ReplyDeleteSo inspirational... You shall live to the Glory of God... Congratulations in advance!!
ReplyDeleteInspiring!!! This story is really gonna touch lives. I like your courage.
ReplyDeleteSo inspirational... You shall live to testify to the Glory of God.. Congratulations in advance!!
ReplyDeleteMay God continue to give him strength and courage.
ReplyDeleteThank God its HiV no Ebola.......
ReplyDeleteWHAT an inspiring write up. you will live to fulfill your purpose on earth.
ReplyDeletewow
ReplyDeleteSo inspired...someone so down...yet so high up...
ReplyDeletereally inspiring and such a cute young man.God is your strenghtand your pillar and thank u for sharing your story
ReplyDeleteYOU ARE JUST AMAZING!!! I thank God for your courage. lots of us are inspired. many people would prefare to keep it to themselves since they're celebs but you took a bold step and bless a lot of us. thank bro. I love u big time.
ReplyDeleteNigerians need to learn that HIV is not a death sentence.....
ReplyDeleteYou can fall in love,get married and have kids....
One Love...
@Karzak Mama
God see you through
ReplyDeleteI bless God for u
ReplyDeleteKeep the faith bro! God is still in the business of turning imposibility into possible,He is still the God that healed all our diseases even HIV, so keep up the positive attitude and one day,the result will turn to negative.Amen
ReplyDeleteThis is thought provoking. Lots of people around the world are yet to discover themselves. This inspiring article as pop up a question of "Who are you?".
ReplyDeleteThought provoking. "Discover yourself". "Who are you?"
ReplyDeleteThought provoking. "Discover yourself". "Who are you?"
ReplyDeleteWhen I tested positive I cried and asked God to take it away but nothing happened I then asked God to give me strength to accept what I can't change since then I have being living my life doing all the things I love to do even though I don't have the money to take care of myself like Kenny does I do the little I can and let God handle the rest. I love me for me and am not less human am grateful for everything and all situation I find myself i trust God will work wonders through me
ReplyDeleteGod will take away that disease from u 1day, mark my words. U will taste negative 1day. I like ur courage bro.
ReplyDeleteAnd my respect for Kenny just trippled...Aunty if you like donot post my comment. God dey watch you in 5D.
ReplyDeleteso inspiring..may u live with perfect health n long life 4 givin hope 2 does who ca t face der fears...a guy wit both charisma n character..God bless u 4 being real n honest...
ReplyDeleteThis is going to be my first and honest comment on this blog, Thanks for this inspiring story, is so encouraging, I wish I can have your detais. Thanks for sharing
ReplyDeleteSo inspiring
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing this! I love your courage and the fact that you finally discovered yourself.
ReplyDeleteThis article has inspired me and would always be a reference material for me in my present journey of my self discovery. I'm presenting going through a challenging life situation and it's true that we can only find help within us!
Well done!
Thanks for sharing this! I love your courage and the fact that you finally discovered yourself.
ReplyDeleteThis article has inspired me and would always be a reference material for me in my present journey of my self discovery. I'm presenting going through a challenging life situation and it's true that we can only find help with us!
Well done!
Dats inspiring
ReplyDeleteThank u soo much Kenny, for this articale. U just saved a soul. I just dicovered my status three months back and felt like taking my life, I suddenly hated myself and I was begging God to take my life....but this write up has given me the strength to go o. Thank u soooooo much kenny and God bless
ReplyDeleteBeautiful write up...keep living.
ReplyDeleteThis article warmed my heart. U r lifted kenny. You are so fine too.
ReplyDeleteI like this guy
ReplyDeleteInspirational confession, it is mind blowing experience.Kenny Badmus you are an instrument of inspiration in God's hand to humanity.Peace with you.
ReplyDelete