Dear LIB readers, Will my husband accept gestational surrogacy? | Welcome to Linda Ikeji's Blog

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Thursday 15 January 2015

Dear LIB readers, Will my husband accept gestational surrogacy?

From a female LIB reader
My heart is very heavy as I write this. I don't know what to do but I need some advise. During my last pregnancy, I suffered a very serious complication. The doctors said I would not be able to have children again. My husband doesn't know about this and I don't know if I should tell him. We have 2 girls, I know the African mentality of wanting to have a son. I am just shattered. I don't even know how to continue to live on because I always wanted more children. I am trying to explore the option of gestational surrogacy and I dont know if my husband would be open to this idea.
You have two children already and don't know how to continue living because you can't have more? Hmm. OK. Any answers for her?
at 1/15/2015 06:50:00 am

326 comments:

  1. Mz steph15 January 2015 at 06:53

    What about people who don't have any. If your hubby is comfortable with the 2, why stress yourself over a third child. Good luck

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 06:54

    Girls are kids too,some have non,love your kids and tell your husband,abi u be house wife when no get work dey fear say your husband go leave you?...any way be happy for what you have and forget about what you don't,your husband should understand,only if he is wicked.

    ReplyDelete
  3. seunLondon15 January 2015 at 06:54

    Girl u so ungrateful....All you need to hope for is long life to bring up the 2 adorable cuties u already have. #SeunLondon

    ReplyDelete
  4. www.glowyshoe.com15 January 2015 at 06:54

    Sweety i need to rest i alreadly hv kids ok..some pple out dnt have any

    Visit my blog

    www.glowyshoe.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  5. ujunwa15 January 2015 at 06:54

    Better still talk to him..he may consider going on wit it...

    ReplyDelete
  6. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 06:54

    he just might tho. it's up to both of you rili.

















































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    ReplyDelete
  7. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 06:55

    How selfish of you.so your other kids aren't children because they are female?

    Please do us a favor and kill yourself.maybe your daughters are better off without a mother that doesn't appreciate what GOD has done for her.

    I'm so angry at this post.gosh!!Oliver twist.!!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 06:55

    Madam, plz u shuld be grateful for d ones u ave nd plz inform ur husband abut ur condition. He deserves d truth.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Unknown15 January 2015 at 06:55

    Mayb u should try ur luck...
    U never can tell.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Amerie's blog15 January 2015 at 06:55

    Nothing wrong with surrogacy.. You can ask him
    www.ameriesblog.com

    ReplyDelete
  11. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 06:56

    y not.. it depends anyways.









































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    ReplyDelete
  12. Unknown15 January 2015 at 06:56

    SHE SHOULD GOOGLE IT LINDA





    LINDA'S BABY

    ReplyDelete
  13. Zizi15 January 2015 at 06:56

    Sipping my hot coffee, let me sit n watch

    ReplyDelete
  14. Unknown15 January 2015 at 06:56

    Make she go hang herself nah as she doesn't know how to continue living...mtsheww, you have two girls and you are complaining what do you expect those without a child to do? you should be happy to be alive. Some died while giving birth to sons and their husbands still took other wives. My dear accept your fate and thank God for your life.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Unknown15 January 2015 at 06:58

    My dear you have two children already and the problem you're in right now is not totally your Fault so you better sit your husband and have chat with him. Whether you tell him or not, he will find out and then,you must have lost his trust. Speak with him please

    ReplyDelete
  16. Unknown15 January 2015 at 06:58

    I'll advise you should be happy with the two girls u've got, but you can try suggest that with him, if he's cool with it you can but if he's not just be happy with your girls.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Unknown15 January 2015 at 06:59

    Just be thankful to God, u hav two kids and u still feel sad about it, others are looking for just one so u better stop thinking and move on.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:00

    I will tell u to enjoy the life u have today cos there are so many out there without a child and u already have 2 but if u really need more kids I advice u look up to God cos there is nottin too difficult for Him, have heard. Of a woman without womb conceive and have kids God made you and can always fix anything that goes wrong. God bless u

    ReplyDelete
  19. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 07:00

    For gooodness sake u should be grateful u even have two kids. When I read that u couldn't have children for I second I was pained till I continued to read that u even have u
    I would say u r being selfish. Not trying to judge u but u have two kids to live all your life for. So cos u can have more u wanna die and leave the two kids motherless for a baby that's not even going to be born. I think u should talk to u hubby, am sure he will understand. And ask the spirit of God for help
    All the best.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Neks15 January 2015 at 07:00

    >>>> If 2 girls not enough for you and husband, after which you must let him know....hmm then hit the street woman... People are dying to have even 1 and can't.... Don't be an ingrate to God, you girls will bear you Son's....by the way they can keep their Father's name after marriage if they choose...<<<<

    ReplyDelete
  21. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:00

    i wonder what you need more kids for.2 is ok!


    #GodblessNigeria

    ReplyDelete
  22. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 07:00

    My dear tell him before it's too late... his reaction would prove whether he loves u or not





    Hello .. Spice up your morning with this funny pics...










    THURSDAY Laughs









    ReplyDelete
  23. AbokiDaWarriBoy15 January 2015 at 07:01

    Mtchhhhhhewwwww,some women out der ar even looking 4 miscarriage,and u here complaining after two children. Smh

    ReplyDelete
  24. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:02

    My dear na prayer ooo cos marriage now na something else I just prayer n wish God will touch his heart so dat he will understand

    ReplyDelete
  25. AbokiDaWarriBoy15 January 2015 at 07:02

    Woman tell him,if he can't stand it,take a U-Turn

    ReplyDelete
  26. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:02

    It doesn't matter whether or not you still wanna have children but there's no way you can keep such a sensitive matter away from your husband. Go straight away and tell him

    ReplyDelete
  27. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:02

    You sound like some1 who's ungrateful.
    Tell him about it, the worst he can do is marry som1 who will give him a son.
    Please, be thankful u ve those girls.

    ReplyDelete
  28. Dave Mide15 January 2015 at 07:03

    Why would you not tell your husband in the first place? Its not in your place to determine if he will accept it or not , your job as a wife is to share with him almost everything especially issues that affects both of you! You have 2 kids already , you aint barren at least. open up to him first then you know what else to do.

    ReplyDelete
  29. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:03

    I understand your fear cos u don't have a male child but keeping it to yourself won't solve anything, just tell him and hear his opinion. You already have two girls so not having a son shouldn't stop you from living.

    ReplyDelete
  30. AbokiDaWarriBoy15 January 2015 at 07:03

    So having only girls is nw a taboo?

    ReplyDelete
  31. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:03

    I understand your fear cos u don't have a male child but keeping it to yourself won't solve anything, just tell him and hear his opinion. You already have two girls so not having a son shouldn't stop you from living.

    ReplyDelete
  32. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:03

    I understand your fear cos u don't have a male child but keeping it to yourself won't solve anything, just tell him and hear his opinion. You already have two girls so not having a son shouldn't stop you from living.

    ReplyDelete
  33. Olusoji15 January 2015 at 07:04

    Madam I don't think any african man Will buy the idea of surrogacy. You have two children what else? Go and ask those who are looking for children for past 20 years. God has bless u with beautiful children be appreciative.

    ReplyDelete
  34. Gazo15 January 2015 at 07:05

    U av two kids b4, WTF is ur P, 4get any stupid afican mentality n tell ur hubby wht d doctors told u jare.

    ReplyDelete
  35. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:05

    MR EDDY said.
    The lord is thy strength. I will suggest you open up to ur husband. as for me two kids are OK. Whether boys or girls. Children are gifts from God.
    ^
    ^
    ^™THAT EDO BOY.COM~wishes u happy new year.

    ReplyDelete
  36. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:06

    You have kids of your own. Make ur husband to understand ur health status. He will understand.
    $.
    $.
    @Mr Endowed via Lumia phone

    ReplyDelete
  37. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:06

    You've not Discussed With Your Husband, na LIB you come. Your Head is not Correct!!
    .
    .
    .
    .Disclaimer:: Raise Your Words, Not Your Voice. It Is Rain That Grows Flowers, Not Thunder..

    ReplyDelete
  38. King Rock15 January 2015 at 07:06

    Woman you sound really ungrateful for the kids God has already given you. People like you just want kids for quantity and not quality. You better love and devote your time to raising your children because are praying for just one child and they haven't received yet.

    ReplyDelete
  39. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:07

    U shld b tankful dat u av 2kids already n not being an ingrate! I no of som1 who's bin married for 17yrs no issue!
    Is it DAT u n ur hubby aren't frnds? Wen d doctor TLD u ,u couldn't av more kids y didn't u tell him as @ den? Even nw ders noting der in telling him cos its ur lyf we r talking abt here!
    Tel him ders noting rong besides d option ur considering isn't a.bad.one.

    ReplyDelete
  40. Pink Bananas15 January 2015 at 07:07

    Go and sleep biko. That's my advice to you.

    ReplyDelete
  41. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 07:07

    First of all,What type of doctor will tell ONLY the wife that she might not be able to conceive anymore?...Isn't that an information both husband & wife deserves to know?

    And also,for God sake..2 kids is ok..male or female! Till today,i still 'YARB' my mumsy on having 5 kids...like what do u want to do with them? fry dem chop? It's so old school & annoying to have 3-5 kids...2 is OK!!! JUST OK...

    ReplyDelete
  42. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 07:07

    It's best for you to tell him nw nd explain how it all happened rather than him getting to find out nd u av 2 daughters already so dats aii.... Families can lyk to go take a chill pill on having a son

    ReplyDelete
  43. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:09

    i suggest u tell him about the said complications. U'd be surprised he might not want u to have any more kids not to endanger ur life or he might agree to the gestational surrogacy. But u gotta tell him...

    ReplyDelete
  44. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 07:10

    You are ungrateful. You already have two kids, is your husband complaining or you are just selfish.

    ReplyDelete
  45. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 07:10

    Lolz #bright bravo# 7EFA4A13

    ReplyDelete
  46. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 07:10

    Seriously!!, trying to ve a child for yrs. Wouldn't mind having 2 daughters. I guess u don't know how good u ve it.

    ReplyDelete
  47. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:11

    Whose report do u believe d doctor or God ma dear u ar fertile so stop worryin nd hold God by his words nd see him work wonderz itz ur year of heaven on earth

    ReplyDelete
  48. love15 January 2015 at 07:11

    ur only answer is God cos he alone knws everythn and pls tell him bfor he starts getting worried.

    ReplyDelete
  49. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:11

    Keep praying God will see you through, tell your husband about it.

    ReplyDelete
  50. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:11

    Have u done check up with the Heavenly Doctor?

    ReplyDelete
  51. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:11

    While sme pple av one, u av two?? Nd u nt stil ok wif dem? Oriegwu

    ReplyDelete
  52. Charles Okey15 January 2015 at 07:12

    A bit edgy how the husband wasn't told by the doctor. Its not your fault. Any civilised man will understand. Hiding it complicates it to look like you had a hand in your condition. Pray. Your situation may be medically impossible but spiritually solvable. Why surrogacy? Is it a man you can't tell your predicament that you can tell about surrogacy? Be content. Many are asking God even for one female child.

    ReplyDelete
  53. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:13

    I ve always love kids. The more money i make, the more kids i sire.

    ReplyDelete
  54. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:13

    Go n sit down abeg,u b baby factory?

    ReplyDelete
  55. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 07:14

    You drag urself into this by not telling you husband, buh is never too late, u can still tell him, whn u do, u can come bk for advice..Street

    ReplyDelete
  56. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 07:14

    Na wa o, pikin na pikin na, u shld be grateful for what uv got, som av got none

    ReplyDelete
  57. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:15

    My dear all u need is to let him know about it,and also pray he understand the situation he is ur husband,

    ReplyDelete
  58. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:15

    Drink hypo if u dnt know how to con't living.....okwa uwaa na ato ka sugar? Hian!

    ReplyDelete
  59. bisi15 January 2015 at 07:16

    Linda please tell thiis Lady not to use her own hands to dig her grave.

    ReplyDelete
  60. Jesus Reigns15 January 2015 at 07:17

    If we ask us, who we go ask na?

    ReplyDelete
  61. DaBabe15 January 2015 at 07:17

    Why are human beings so insatiable? After 2 kids you are shattered cos you can't have more.

    ReplyDelete
  62. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:17

    Y keep a secret from ur husband? Something that pertains to him as well? But what's with the male child/African mentality thingy? Woman enjoy ur life and train ur kids. Also let ur hubby on d know pls

    ReplyDelete
  63. Favoured15 January 2015 at 07:18

    exactly my thot linda..

    ReplyDelete
  64. Damilola15 January 2015 at 07:18

    Why are human beings so ungrateful? And what is wrong with having girls? Infact, I don't have any advice for you, I am seriously heartbroken.

    ReplyDelete
  65. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 07:18

    Madam, u already have 2girls shouldn't u be happy with them , And thank God for gifting those like princesses to u? Hmmm, may ur quest for more not lead u to ur early grave. Many mothers have lost their lives because of this utter foolishness And left their poor kids behind to the cruel hands of step mothers. My candid advice, tell ur husband about the situation of things And then if worse comes to worst, u both can adopt a male child.

    ReplyDelete
  66. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:18

    No answers for her. U done see 2 already n u still get mouth complain
    Follow mi on IG @darkpearl4

    ReplyDelete
  67. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 07:19

    You should thank GOD you have two. By the way, how are you sure that if you do surrogate it is gonna be male child? Don't put words into GOD's mind. Before it happened HE knows everything. #######OTUoCHA

    ReplyDelete
  68. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:19

    u should be gratetul to God cos u have two children. Anyways d doctor is nt ur God, if u believe u will receive

    ReplyDelete
  69. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 07:21

    You are not serious and you're ungreatful to God. If you do anything stupid, you will regret it.iam married and I don't even have a child yet. Can you give me one of those girls? Seems you don't appreciate them.
    May God forgive your ignorance

    ReplyDelete
  70. Dr. Ada15 January 2015 at 07:21

    Please try 2 summon the courage to tell him the truth, coz it will be worse if he finds out later. Pray to God before u suggest surrogacy or any other thing. May God grant u peace & happiness in your home, Amen.

    ReplyDelete
  71. Adetoro15 January 2015 at 07:22

    There are two issues here.

    First, get over this "I don't know how to continue living" attitude. It is actually ingratitude. You have two children. I presume they are healthy. You better go on your knees and thank God. Some people will give anything to have a child, whether girl, boy or hermaphrodite sef. Please count your blessings and stop grieving over a phantom loss. What if you had lost your life in the complications? And what is wrong if they are girls? Are you not female? What is African mentality? Most people have totally moved on from that mentality.

    Second, and without prejudice to my first point, if you really really want to try surrogacy, ask your husband. That's the person you should be having that conversation with. And, again, that's no longer a strange thing in Nigeria.

    Bottom line is this: Life is about perspective. First, I don't think you have a problem. Second, if you persist to think you have a problem, the solution is very much available. You know your husband best.

    ReplyDelete
  72. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:22

    Be grateful of what you have and stop enslaving yourself under the local mentality of. "I must have a male child".

    ReplyDelete
  73. MADE IN NIGERIA15 January 2015 at 07:23

    I really think ur the one now with the African mentality....just a few questions for u, are girls not children? and why hide ur complications from ur husband? i really think u should discuss ur health with ur husband, he will definitely understand except he doesnt care about you.

    ReplyDelete
  74. angelite15 January 2015 at 07:24

    She needs a boy buh u can't b sure d surrogate wil ave a boy....tell ur hubby n probably adopt aa boy. u myt end up avin so many girls

    ReplyDelete
  75. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 07:25

    how can u keep such secret to ur husband.open up to him he can also come up with solution and mind u God is not dead talk to him in prayer

    ReplyDelete
  76. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:26

    You are an ungrateful human being. Many women are looking for one and you already have 2, just because of a male child you are shattered. Haven't you seen those with 5 or 7 girls without a boy? Go and fight God. Smh

    Shalom in Nigeria, Amen

    ReplyDelete
  77. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:26

    My dear, I ll advise you not to take risk because more children, you already have two children... I have two children also and I and my wife have decided that its enough... we have chosen to give them the best of life why we also enjoy ourselves.

    ReplyDelete
  78. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:27

    How could you and the doctor keep such serious situation from your husband? One thing I have come to learn about keeping secrets in any relationship is that it will one day come to hunt you!
    Dear you need to tell you hubby the whole truth first, its after then u guys can now think of any other method of giving birth if its really necessary.

    ReplyDelete
  79. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 07:29

    Dis is D time off faith. Where is ur faith whom do u serve, joshua said choose dis day whom u will serve for me an my house hold is YAHWEH. U don't hv a man of God in ur live, go an meet him. Waitin hard man no fit hard Gold. Ugo-Gold,
    Ugojame@nokiamail.com

    ReplyDelete
  80. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 07:29

    Dis is D time off faith. Where is ur faith whom do u serve, joshua said choose dis day whom u will serve for me an my house hold is YAHWEH. U don't hv a man of God in ur live, go an meet him. Waitin hard man no fit hard Gold. Ugo-Gold,
    Ugojame@nokiamail.com

    ReplyDelete
  81. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:31

    Simple. just talk to him. it is better you tell him yourself now than for him to find out himself.

    ReplyDelete
  82. keji15 January 2015 at 07:32

    Talk to him fes....

    ReplyDelete
  83. CHERRY15 January 2015 at 07:33

    Tnk God for the ones u have n tell ur husband what happened that's all!

    ReplyDelete
  84. maryann15 January 2015 at 07:34

    what if u end up wth anoda girl?thank God 4 d luvly girls He gave u ,some dnt v any

    ReplyDelete
  85. Blog tourist15 January 2015 at 07:34

    so u wanna die and leave ur 2 kids cos u cant have more?....You do realize der are alot of barren women out there right?...Thank God for wat u have and tell ur hubby d situation.....okbye

    ReplyDelete
  86. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:35

    Lol...see this woman o. you have 2girls and u're still worried? Tor!!! May God solve your problems

    ReplyDelete
  87. REAL. PIKIN15 January 2015 at 07:35

    Hmmm Ungrateful Women, until U have Battalion before U can have reason for Living abi?

    ReplyDelete
  88. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 07:36

    You have just put yourself in bondage, you mean you don't know how to continue living because you have two girls and can't have more?My advice : girls rule, girls are blessings, they bring peace & calmness to a home, can't imagine my home without girls, live your life, enjoy it forget the trash about men wanting a male child, it's in your head, you have one life to live.

    ReplyDelete
  89. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:37

    Tell him d truth.. Den liv wit ur 2 beautiful angel..
    Some people out dia r just lookin for an issue n God blessed u wit 2.. U don't seem to realise hw much God loves u4 givin u da 2angel..

    ReplyDelete
  90. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:37

    U can ask those who don't have even one if they drank poison to end it all... Better tell ur hubby n pray over it. If God wills, u'll have more, if not be grateful for the ones u have n stop being unnecessarily greedy!

    ReplyDelete
  91. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 07:37

    Do not complicate your life, do not be ungrateful. Face your fears and tell your husband what the doctor said and you will be surprised at how will love u more for being honest.

    ReplyDelete
  92. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 07:38

    This begs the question, what kind of man did u get married to? Because I don't see why you could not tell him about the complications you had in your previous pregnancy...

    ReplyDelete
  93. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:40

    You are such an ingrate, someone is out dr begging God for just a child irrespective of d sex and u av 2 and u don't kw how to continue living. Besides if ur husband love u and u love him u shldnt ko something as serious as ds frm him.wake up frm dt sleep of urs d men of today appreciate children irrespective of d sex

    ReplyDelete
  94. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:40

    Linda post dt my comment o mk I no look for am wt torch

    ReplyDelete
  95. prestige15 January 2015 at 07:41

    You sounds ungrateful to God. You have two girls and still complaining about ur living, may God forgive you. You better put ur mind together and take good care of ur flowers. The African husband of yours can go ahead and marry another wife. Don't take any unnecessary risk.

    ReplyDelete
  96. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:42

    I think you should speak with him first. Since you already have two. Having only daughters is as beautiful as anything. So do not feel bad. The thing is that you'll never know until you speak to your husband and find out what he wants and what he doesnt

    If he decides on the procedure then fine. But ask yourself if you would be able to love a child made by your man and another woman, even if it doesn't involve any physical contact or intimacy. Not that it's wrong, i just want you to ask yourself and know what you can really handle. Take it easy and take your time to think about it. You and your husband should think over this, the ups and downs involved. Put tradition and beliefs or the mans pride aside and think of whats best for the both of you. Left for me, ill say you are good the way you are. You are already blessed, recognize the blessing for what it is. BUt this is just me, the option is still yours.


    please visit www.askralphblog.com for your direct advice and answer. Also learn from other peoples experience.

    Hope this helps

    ReplyDelete
  97. The Monarch15 January 2015 at 07:43

    ask him na

    ReplyDelete
  98. SWILL MARTIN15 January 2015 at 07:43

    Tell ur hubby jare,4 beta 4 worse if reverse waz d case u 4 bear am naa or luk 4 solutions,so derefore tell him d truth i'll advise you to go to a good church,preferably SCOAN I.e prophet t.b joshua's church and get the anointed water for fruit of the womb,there's 1 4 fruit of the womb.my dear seriously believe God and pray in the name of Jesus when u use the water it works like as if Jesus himself touched you,dnt mind wot pple will tell you it WORKED 4 my family we were not this financially bouyant buh now we are,my uncle was a poor engineer buh now he's building his first house,even me afta using it I had my first A in a 4 unit course in AAU faculty of law ekpoma which people know is very difficult,so u see genuinely believe in the power of God and visit SCOAN ur problems wud be over.God will see u tru.

    ReplyDelete
  99. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:45

    I understand how you feel. But you should be thankful to God for giving you two beautiful daughters. There are people out there who are even looking for one and yet.... Relax. Woman.






    Blackberry gives you the best and make you forget the rest.
    ....................................
    David (dave_gino)
    »Commenting from my BLACKBERRY 9900«

    ReplyDelete
  100. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 07:46

    so sad but with God all things are possible. instead of surrogacy why not adoption

    ReplyDelete
  101. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:46

    YOU SHOULD FIRST CONFIND IN YOUR HUSBAND DEN U KNOW WAT NEXT STEP TO TAKE
    ×
    ×
    ×
    ×
    ×
    DON RICHIE SAID SO VIA TECNO

    ReplyDelete
  102. chocolate15 January 2015 at 07:47

    Linda dis grammar strong oh, wetin b gestational surrogacy, it's a medical word which sm of us dnt knw.bt in any case my dear just pray there is notin too hard for the lord,meanwhile be thankfull to God at least u have 2 sm are luking for just 1 dem no get.and pls let ur hubby knw abt d current situation

    ReplyDelete
  103. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 07:47

    Please, be sincere with you husband. Why hide something like that? You have two kids already and should be grateful. I doubt if your husband is worried sick about not having a make child, times have changed madam. You should have told him what happened. If he wants a male child, make him born am. Open up and please be aware that, there are millions of childless women who would rather have two girls. Than none at all. Be grateful please.

    ReplyDelete
  104. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 07:47

    First of all the truth shall set you free , tell your Husband don't live in lies , that's the only way to find a solution ... Girls are Children what a man can do a woman can do even better appreciate what God has given to you

    ReplyDelete
  105. ebonyz...15 January 2015 at 07:48

    She no serious. I no wan talk too much abeg. Why she no go tell her hubby?As i mentioned, i no wan talk too much

    ReplyDelete
  106. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:48

    a.k.a EDWIN CHINEDU AZUBUKO said...
    .
    I just pray ur husband divorce yu for a better woman that will be open to him at all things..... Mumu......
    *GLO BRING 3G TO KONTAGORA*
    .
    .
    ***CURRENTLY IN JUPITER***

    ReplyDelete
  107. Rita15 January 2015 at 07:48

    U are a very greedy. Person! U have 2 kids and ur still complaining!

    ReplyDelete
  108. smarty15 January 2015 at 07:51

    Just keep the faith up,God is a God of perfection.and you need to be thankful.stop getting worried.

    ReplyDelete
  109. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:52

    To start with,u must be very rich to want to go for gestational surrogacy,secondly:y don't u wanna tell ur husband?was he not the one who impregnated u in d first place?or is there something u are hiding from him?c'mon lady.all I can advice is for u to tell ur husband,they say two good heads is better than one

    ReplyDelete
  110. Onyx's Girlfriend (he isn't gay pls)15 January 2015 at 07:52

    Jst b prayerful, a miracle can stil happen. #lindagiveawayonmymind

    ReplyDelete
  111. lucy J15 January 2015 at 07:53

    We jus hav 2 do sumtin abt dis nigeria men mentality. Dey all need d western renewal of mind, haba!
    Madam jus tell him already n if he cant deal wit it , move on. Ur life is impotant 2 ur children, family n d society biko.

    ReplyDelete
  112. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:53

    my dear tell your husband he has the right to know,if I were you I will stop at that two. I know you would like to have a son, there is reason why you should stop at two.appreciate your girls who knows what they may turn out to be worth having than the boy your longing for. Obama has only two girls you know and he very happy.don't mind African mentality, that's how my mum gave birth to 7 girls cus she's looking for a boy.

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  113. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:55

    Linda you de talk as if you no know as some Igbo men de take pursue male children...

    My dear, I think you should do all the research applicable to the option, have all your facts down to how much everything would cost, and deliver it to him like a presentation. he should be able to appreciate that you acknowledge his need and are ready to do something about it.

    May God be with you and yours as you go through this hurdle in Jesus name, amen. Have a nice day.

    ReplyDelete
  114. Liflblog.wordpress.com15 January 2015 at 07:57

    Times have changed & gestational surrogacy is a very viable option for you. Talk to him about it.
    Pls visit my blog...

    Liflblog.WordPress.com

    LIVE YOUR BEST LIFE EVERY DAY!

    ReplyDelete
  115. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:57

    Ask him first and tell him all that he need to know.

    ReplyDelete
  116. SWILL MARTIN15 January 2015 at 07:57

    Tell him joooor,its 4 beta 4 worse naaa,mchheeeeew if naim get problem u 4 dey hlp am find solution scatter,my dear go 2 a good church preferably SCOAN i.e prophet TB joshua's church and get the anointed water for fruit of the womb specifically,dnt listen 2 wot detractors wud tell you if you want 2 have a son den believe that God can give you 1,afta u get it apply it in the name of JESUS,and genuinely believe that JESUS has touched you,coz most pple belive that everything natural is natural,my dear d spiritual controls the physical,the presence of GOD is in that church ooooo,no mind wetin peole go tell you ooo dat as I've come to know is total rubish,it WORKED 4 my family oooo we were not this financially buoyant buh now we are,even my uncle was a poor engineer buh now he's building his first house,eeeven me my sista I had my first A in a 4 unit course in AAU faculty of law ekpoma which people know is very difficult,even aunty Linda u need am too make u take nak 1 bobo sharp sharp,so u see GOD still exist and he can turn ur life around in sme seconds*****thank me later......eeehhhhh haters muna no yarn rubbish cncernin my coment ooooo coz if u tink say u de crase ur crase go see my crase Gbaga!#word

    ReplyDelete
  117. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 07:58

    My dear woman, God has given you two kids but the oliver twist in you wants more. Please don't kill yourself over nothing. Take care of your kids. You've tried

    ReplyDelete
  118. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 07:58

    Stupid. I am trying and hoping and praying to have just one. Any gender. And she does not know how to keep on living with two? Hennn...she should go and die then. Oniranu.

    ReplyDelete
  119. Sugarsweet15 January 2015 at 07:59

    What a world..... People are praying for atleast a child so the world will know that they are still fertile and you have 2 girls and your still complaining.

    Why will you hide your complication from your husband? Are you sure it was as a result of your last pregnancy? Why such secret from your spouse? I can't understand some people........ Bia madam, stop disturbing us with this bullshit

    ReplyDelete
  120. Unknown15 January 2015 at 07:59

    You should be grateful to God that u already ve two kids.

    ReplyDelete
  121. obianuju15 January 2015 at 08:01

    Nne focus on d ones God have given 2u biko...2 is enough...

    ReplyDelete
  122. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 08:03

    I have 2 twin girls, I am fine with dat and I am a man
    So I don't understand what you are talking about

    ReplyDelete
  123. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:04

    Haba madam,u are lucky dat GOD has blessed u with 2 girls sef,hmm in dis case I advice u sit ur husband down nd hear wat he feels abt d issue be4 nd secondly be very very prayful .just relax our lord JESUS CHRIST will never giveup on you

    ReplyDelete
  124. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 08:05

    You had better be thankful for the two you already have. You don't know how to carry on, how abt those who don't have at all. Contentment people

    ReplyDelete
  125. Mzz_Mary15 January 2015 at 08:05

    Pls be contented wit what God has given you.

    ReplyDelete
  126. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:06

    You have two daughters who are healthy and Alive you should be grateful and raise them in d best possible way and stop disturbing your self with primitive thinking..... there are a lot of people looking 2 get even a child and don't have any you have two just be grateful n move on..... it's not about having a dozen kids d key is being able to provide n raise the ones u have in the most outstanding way

    ReplyDelete
  127. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:06

    You should have told him immediately, your keeping away from him would make him mad @ you. Linda take note!

    ReplyDelete
  128. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:06

    You should have told him immediately, your keeping away from him would make him mad @ you. Linda take note!

    ReplyDelete
  129. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:06

    You should have told him immediately, your keeping away from him would make him mad @ you. Linda take note!

    ReplyDelete
  130. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 08:06

    Why did she keep the advice of the doctor away from the husband as at the time she had her last daughter? Anyway, involve a doctor (maybe the same doctor that advised you) to talk to you and your husband concerning your medical condition and the best possible option. He will accept it better than if she talks to him herself considering the fact that she has kept it away from him since her last delivery.

    ReplyDelete
  131. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:06

    You should have told him immediately, your keeping away from him would make him mad @ you. Linda take note!

    ReplyDelete
  132. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:07

    You should have told him immediately, your keeping away from him would make him mad @ you. Linda take note!

    ReplyDelete
  133. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:07

    Give thanks to God for the 2 children and tell your husband what you have been hiding from him. i dont think you have any problem.

    ReplyDelete
  134. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 08:07

    You are just ungrateful. What if you didn't have any child? You don't know how to go on living indeed...Mstchewww

    ReplyDelete
  135. chiveleen15 January 2015 at 08:09

    If with the two kids you dont know how to continue living, go and ask those who have none to teach you how to live. Mtchewww

    ReplyDelete
  136. gidis15 January 2015 at 08:09

    I fink yu shud let ur husband knw d situatn of tins tho u'd v lotta explanation 2 do bt atleast let him knw n u knw what he stands is on d situatn

    ReplyDelete
  137. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 08:11

    Shes selfies period

    ReplyDelete
  138. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 08:12

    My advice for you is to be thankful to God for the ones he has given you already and leave the rest for him to take care for and stop complaining.For he said in all situations we should always be grateful.

    ReplyDelete
  139. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 08:12

    Really what's the problem with having girls? You have 2 girls and u are not satisfied.. is your hubby complaining or haven't u seen people who have four girls even more.. If you have more kids and they turn out to be girls what will you do? Please!! It is well with you.

    ReplyDelete
  140. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:14

    This story is B***S*** because the person your Doctor should talk to at the initial stage is your husbnd and not you unless YOU'RE not legally married so, my advice to you is cook another story pls, pass....

    ReplyDelete
  141. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 08:14

    Well, doctors are not God........... just with faith you can still bear more.

    ReplyDelete
  142. Goziem Oh LORD15 January 2015 at 08:16

    Ok

    ReplyDelete
  143. Daralohi15 January 2015 at 08:17

    My dear,please ur husband should be aware of ur present situation,and i dont advise for surrogacy when u already have two beautiful daughters.

    Miss indomie says so.

    ReplyDelete
  144. uzo15 January 2015 at 08:17

    Discuss it with him he will reason with you and come to think of it,the girls you have, are they not human beings? A lot of ladies will give anything to have just a babe and you have 2 and still not apperciative.

    ReplyDelete
  145. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:18

    After u will claim that u love n respect ur husband. All this years u didn't tell him about wat d Dr told u. Abeg park well. If u like go native na ur own palava

    ReplyDelete
  146. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:18

    Firstly, apologise to Ɠ♡D for your selfish thought. Secondly, if you want a surrogate, i hope you know what you are asking or wishing for? Talk to your hubby about your thoughts. Most importantly, Pray fervently.

    ReplyDelete
  147. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:19

    U beta close ur mouth dere...So pple dt dont ve at all shd drink sniper? Ure so ungrateful

    ReplyDelete
  148. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:20

    You don't have to keep it secret frm ur husband, you ve to tell him but mind you, African men mentality, he might start cheating on you later in search of a male child

    ReplyDelete
  149. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:20

    Wat is she talking about.u have 2 already is ur hubby forcing u 2 av more kids? Some women dy cause trouble wit their hands

    ReplyDelete
  150. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 08:21

    Madam please go and sit down in one corner. Greed and discontentment rear their ugly heads in so many forms, so what should childless people be saying?

    ReplyDelete
  151. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:21

    She is ungrateful to God she has 2 and is Complaining I dnt blame her.so female kids are not it abi!Linda ps dnt post this sort of issues abeg

    ReplyDelete
  152. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 08:21

    Like seriously....... thank God u Ave at all. Why did u hide d facts dat u had complications in d first place.... women and rubbish secrets (ow is d development
    ur fault)....ur greatest mistake was hiding d truth from him.....I ll feel hurt more dat my spouse hid such a delicate matter from me than not able to Ave a son.Advice 2 women "ladies stop secrecy...... d end result is more secrets,lack of trust & regret..... try and be as transparent as possible, transparency earns u trust and boost ur confidence

    ReplyDelete
  153. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:21

    This story ain't real because your husband should be your confidant, Linda knows and your husband doesn't huh? Serious crappy story full of flaws if you guys ask me anyways...

    ReplyDelete
  154. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:22

    Na wa o Madam, Two Children? Does it mean u don't appreciate God 4 those two? Some people dey wey never see half o. And how on earth would ur husband accept the option of gestational surrogacy without u opening up? Madam be grateful to God cos u're blessed.

    ReplyDelete
  155. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:23

    Linda post my comment pls

    ReplyDelete
  156. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:23

    You have. To tell your husband the doctor's reports that would be the starting point

    ReplyDelete
  157. brownsugar15 January 2015 at 08:24

    You haven't told your husband yet and you are this worried? Calm down sweetie. Pray about it first before telling him. You can't keep such information from him for God's sake. That's living a lie. You even have children already. What of those that haven't got any. Cool yourself down biko. Focus on yoursel, family, work/business etc and don't let it bother you. Who knows God could give you another miracle in the future. Forget about the doctors diagnosis. God wins @ the end of the day. Take care sweetie

    ReplyDelete
  158. @baberneh15 January 2015 at 08:26

    i think you should inform your husband about your present condition.. i believe he is the owner of the pregnacy that caused infertility for you?

    you had better dont suggest any thing to him but open up with what happened during your last pregnancy...

    its not your doing but that of God... who knows u might wake up one day and be fertile again... just keep praying...

    ReplyDelete
  159. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 08:26

    seriously dumbass question from an obviously dumb woman.... you dont know how to live? Very dumb....

    ReplyDelete
  160. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 08:27

    Please be grateful that u have two. Some people don't have any. I wonder why you never told your husband when the Doctor told you about this problem. I don't even want more than two kids. Please be thankful that you have had two children in life.

    ReplyDelete
  161. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:27

    My dear be open to your husband and thank God for the two children you have

    ReplyDelete
  162. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 08:27

    U re not happy that u have 2 kids already.pls get a life.

    ReplyDelete
  163. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:28

    You not telling your husband about what the doctor said was wrong. Talk to him about it and both of you will sort it out as a couple. Remember to pray, miracles still happen.

    ReplyDelete
  164. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:28

    Come and adopt me

    ReplyDelete
  165. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:28

    Come and adopt me

    ReplyDelete
  166. ary15 January 2015 at 08:29

    What type of doctor breaks a news of this magnitude to just the wife and not both spouses?! That is just plain unprofessional, tell your husband, that is why he is called your partner cos you are both in this together. Unless you have another reason for not telling him?

    ReplyDelete
  167. shollymama15 January 2015 at 08:30

    Humans sha,instead make u dey fenk God.tell ur husband let him know about it he might nt get mad...some africans are funny weytin make obama do nah mtchew

    ReplyDelete
  168. Becca15 January 2015 at 08:30

    Be grateful madam.........

    ReplyDelete
  169. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:30

    gestational surrogacy in Nigeria? There will always be repercussions IN FUTURE. please be contended with what Gods has given u (your two lovely kids)..... open up to your husband and keep having faith in GOD... look after your kids and husband for there is nothing impossible in the presence of God.

    ReplyDelete
  170. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:31

    Tell ure husband about it.because with tyme he will find out u can't have more children

    ReplyDelete
  171. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 08:32

    Be content with what you have and make peace with God. Tell your husband the truth. There are people who have sons that have brought shame to the family name. A girl child is worth 10 sons in some cases. Each female child I have is worth 10sons. Train them well, pray for them and they will make you and your husband proud IJN. Amen.

    ReplyDelete
  172. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:34

    I think u shud pray 4 God 2 keep those two 4 u,wit God's grace those girl will be greater than men........I can feel ur pain.

    ReplyDelete
  173. ENNY15 January 2015 at 08:35

    Don't be an ingrate pls. Thank God for the 2 kids u already have. Also, try to discuss with ur husband what happened to u and way forward. If not, u myt find urself to blame at the end.

    ReplyDelete
  174. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:35

    She should Call him up @ mid nyt and tell him preferably with tears in her eyes..that depends on the kind of man she's married to

    ReplyDelete
  175. Livvsreamblog15 January 2015 at 08:35

    Question for the married people

    ReplyDelete
  176. Yinka15 January 2015 at 08:36

    Children are heritage of the Lord. God keep your two daughters for you. But make sure your husband is aware of what's going on.



    Meanwhile, I still have a crush on #lauraikeji

    ReplyDelete
  177. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:36

    She should Call him up @ midnight preferably with tears in her eyes and tell him..but that depends on the kind of man she's married to

    ReplyDelete
  178. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:37

    Linda u took the words out of my mouth. Madam, u should be grateful that u had the chance to experience motherhood. Think of others who are unable to conceive, and u are here with 2 luvly girls and u "don't know how to keep living bcos u want more". Abeg, are girls not kids too? Na wa o. Anyway, I think u shuld tell ur husband and suggest the surrogacy stuff. Just pray it goes down well with him.

    ReplyDelete
  179. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 08:43

    U're even lucky having 2 children, is it every woman who have the opportunity of bearing children. If ur hubby luvs u, he'll take the situation the way it is. Jst tell him everything he needs to know.

    ReplyDelete
  180. Lovedoc15 January 2015 at 08:44

    First off, you need to understand that the sex of a fetus is determined by the type of sperm cell that fertilises an egg,so ultimately the sex of your baby is your husbands sole responsibility not yours. Regardless of what happened to your last pregnancy,so long as your womb is still in place and your tubes are patent, you can still carry a pregnancy. Surrogacy is more commonly done in Nigeria than most people know and might not be such a strange option if indicated. However it might not be too wise to keep such important secrets from your spouse, I think being very open from the start would have saved you all these worries. Cheers.

    ReplyDelete
  181. Lovedoc15 January 2015 at 08:44

    First off, you need to understand that the sex of a fetus is determined by the type of sperm cell that fertilises an egg,so ultimately the sex of your baby is your husbands sole responsibility not yours. Regardless of what happened to your last pregnancy,so long as your womb is still in place and your tubes are patent, you can still carry a pregnancy. Surrogacy is more commonly done in Nigeria than most people know and might not be such a strange option if indicated. However it might not be too wise to keep such important secrets from your spouse, I think being very open from the start would have saved you all these worries. Cheers.

    ReplyDelete
  182. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:44

    Seriously, in Africa you need a male child before you consider putting a stop to child bearing. Atleast one!

    ReplyDelete
  183. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:45

    Wat of pipo dat dnt ve any?? Wen u killl urself while tryin to ve more u rest@once....be happi nd tnkful to God 4ur girls!!

    ReplyDelete
  184. DoraBelle15 January 2015 at 08:45

    Linda I think I understand what she meant by not knowing how to continue living because she can't have more children. To be clearer,she meant she wants a male child. Yes that is the norm of our African society but thank God for civilization,our African men are letting go of that 'must have male issue' ideology. It hurts but every child,male or female, is good enough. Now madam you made a mistake by not informing your husband about this problem immediately it happened. But there's still time. Please go and tell your husband your present condition and as long as he loves you,he'll stand by you and know that it's not your fault your womb got destroyed. After all you were trying to make him a father for the 3rd time when the complication happened. You may be surprised he'll gladly accept the surrogacy you're suggesting. Babies via surrogacy are still your own with your DNA so nothing is wrong with it.

    ReplyDelete
  185. Vhughar15 January 2015 at 08:45

    I don't think its right to sub a child/son for ur husband... It has happened and u have to accept that... Don't dare sub cause u've got 2children already.. Just let God protect them for u.. Thanks

    ReplyDelete
  186. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 08:47

    Sorry oh but you don't have problem. I don't even know why you kept it a secret from your husband..there was no need. You already have 2 children..what again? These days wey na 3 highest people dey born. Madam, talk to your husband and take care of your children. You no get problem

    ReplyDelete
  187. Baddest Puta15 January 2015 at 08:48

    I'm sorry but two children are more than enough! I know people that will give an arm just to get pregnant for a day, let alone give birth to a child, you're here talking about gender. Or will gestational surrogacy let you choose the sex of the child?

    ReplyDelete
  188. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:50

    Is ur husband so scary dat u can't talk serious matters like dos to him!? I don't understand y wifes shld live in bondage in der homes, after all, even d Bible said it "both shall bcom 1flesh". My advice for u I dat u shld create a conducive time to talk to ur husby. U knw him n wen he us ready to listen. Open up to him, it's from his response u both'll take decisions. Do dat soon b4 urself wit d tots of "u don't knw how to continue living". Please...

    ReplyDelete
  189. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:51

    2kids are ohk

    ReplyDelete
  190. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 08:51

    Madam,u shd hv told him abt ur complication in d 1st place,deres no need to hide such delicate information 4rm ur husband,hes ur man and he shd understand...u have 2 children already woman,2 children!!u better start thanking God 4 d gift of dose precious babies and u n ur husband shd work together to bring dem up n give dem d best,stop thinking 4 ur husband wen he hasn't even declared his intention of having more babies

    ReplyDelete
  191. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:52

    Wat a man can do,a woman can do better don't think about d Africa mentality

    ReplyDelete
  192. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 08:52

    Na wa oh!!! There is nothing I won't hear or see on earth!!! U ve two kids already, cos u can't have more (which is even a doctor's report n not God's report o) and u don't know how to go on with life any more?Lemme advice u naaa, go n commit suicide. How can people be so ungrateful, there are couples who have been in marriage for years n don't even have a kid. There are women who are ready to do anything to have one or half a kid sef, n u re here complaining. U berra start praising n thanking God, cos God has favoured u. 2ndly, what d doctor said is his own report, go to ur maker, which is d doctor of all doctors, go on kneel n tell HIM that u don't want any surrogate, that u want more kids n u want to bear them with ur own womb, u will be surprised @d result u will get. And why have u not told ur husband d doctor's report ( WOMEN!!!! Making mistakes in marriage since 1801) this is not something to hide from ur hubby, u guyz are in ds together, except both of u didn't swear for better or worse on d altar. Anyways this is my advice for u, I have been married for ten years n ds is what I will do if I were in ur shoes....wish u d best.

    ReplyDelete
  193. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:52

    Nne, tell your husband about the complications. But wait ooo, you have told us your problem here and yet you haven't told your husband.......mistakes wives make.

    ReplyDelete
  194. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:53

    Wat a man can do,a woman can do better don't think about d Africa mentality

    ReplyDelete
  195. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:53

    my dear sister please stick to your two children how are u sure you will have a son from the surrogacy? dont complicate your life and bring more problem to yourself is your husband complaining of a son? remember obama has two daughters and they are happy.

    ReplyDelete
  196. elo tasha15 January 2015 at 08:53

    My dear u can't keep all that burden to yourself,tell your husband

    Post a Comment

    ReplyDelete
  197. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:54

    my dear sister please stick to your two children how are u sure you will have a son from the surrogacy? dont complicate your life and bring more problem to yourself is your husband complaining of a son? remember obama has two daughters and they are happy.

    ReplyDelete
  198. ugly sisi15 January 2015 at 08:55

    U re just an ingrate plsss spare me this your sermon. Som pple hav looked for children for 10yrs or more. Oliver twist wat kept you from telling your husband the truth long ago ? better open up to him blc is only a fool dat will not ask why you want surrogate. If u like dont make yourself happy b4 untimely death go visit u. Lindoo... nxt pls

    ReplyDelete
  199. Unknown15 January 2015 at 08:56

    Have you doctor explain the situation to ur hubby. He might be open minded. Don't exaggerate the situation....

    ReplyDelete
  200. Anonymous15 January 2015 at 08:56

    U must be very ungrateful, 2beautiful daughters and u are sounding suicidal. People praying to even have just one. Better tell up husband about ur predicament and live life to the fullest

    ReplyDelete

Disclaimer: Opinions expressed in comments are those of the comment writers alone and does not reflect or represent the views of Linda Ikeji.

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