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Thursday 3 January 2013

Diary of New Iyawo!!

  Something nice and fun! Enjoy...:-)
Monday: We are back from honeymoon and settled in our new home. It's fun to cook for Chuka . Today I made moin moin and the recipe said, 'Beat 12 eggs separately '. Well, I didn't have enough bowls to do that, so I had to borrow 12 bowls to beat the eggs in. D moin moin turned out fine though.
Tuesday: We wanted a fruit salad for supper. The recipe said, 'Serve without dressing'. So I didn't dress. But Chuka happened to bring a friend home for supper that night. They both looked so startled when I served them. I think it was the salad.
See more after the cut...
 
Wednesday: I decided to serve rice and found a recipe, which said, 'Wash thoroughly before steaming d rice'. So I heated some water and took a bath before steaming the rice. Sounded kind of silly in the middle of the day. I can't say it improved d rice anyhow. 
Thursday: Today Chuka asked for salad again. I tried a new recipe. It said, prepare ingredients, and then toss on a bed of lettuce one hour before serving.' I hunted all over the place for a garden with a bed of lettuce and when I got one, I tossed my salad into the bed of lettuce and stood over there for over one hour so the dog would not take it. CHUKA came over and asked if I felt all right. I wonder why? He must be stressed at work; I'll try and be supportive.
Friday: Today I found an easy recipe for cookies. It said, 'Put all ingredients in a bowl and beat it'. Beat it I did, to my mother's place. There must have been something wrong with the recipe, because when I came back home again; it looked the same as when I left it.
Saturday: Chuka went shoppin today and brought home a chicken. He asked me to dress it for Sunday. I'm sure I don't know how hens dress for Sunday. I never noticed back on the farm, but I found an old doll dress and its little cute shoes. I thought the hen looked really cute. When Chuka saw it, he started counting to ten. Either he was really stressed because of his work, or he wanted the chicken to dance. When I asked him what was wrong he started crying and shouting out 'Why me? Why me?'
LMAO!!

148 comments:

  1. a big YAWN............

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    Replies
    1. You actually need common sense before you can have a sense of humour. Sorry

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  2. Hahaha! I love what she did with the chicken.

    Onakachi.blogspot.com

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  3. Too funny, what a wife, the husband is in trouble.

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  4. Lololol too hilarious,who wrote this?would luv2read more!

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  5. Hahaha...your mother's house is yours

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  6. My tummyyyyyyy...
    Ds z way hilarious
    Buhahahahahahahahaha

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  7. Linda wont kee us lmao

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  8. Dis is d funniest shyt ever!!!! Hahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahaahahahhahahhahahhahahahahha!!!!!!!!!!

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  9. Linda wont kee us. lmao

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  10. Lmfaooooo...dumb wife

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  11. O.M.Gosh!!! Can't stop laughin here. Linda pls dnt lemme laugh n kiss shoe shinner ooooo.
    1ndaful!!!

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  12. Not funny jare

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  13. Hilarious.... OMG!! Lmao

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  14. LMAO!!! For all those who can't cook! Chuka pele.

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  15. Hehehehehhehe...OMG!!.. Wic part of d bush is she frm Plz.. Lol

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  16. Lmao. She for tie gele for the chicken too nah! Yeye wife. Lol.

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  17. She followed the instructions to the letter. Y was her husband sobbing???

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  18. Replies
    1. Idiot!!! Write your own lets see.

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    2. LOL! I don't expect pple like you to actually relate...

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  19. Hahahahahaha..... Linda u no go kill person o...I Don laff sotay my bf dey check my pulse to make sure say I still normal.

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    Replies
    1. Hahahaha....pulse dey change wit crase?...lool

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  20. Too Too funny. Tears are just streaming out of my eays

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  21. I certainly feel for this guy!!!

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  22. Too Too funny. Tears are just streaming out of my eyes

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  23. LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!!!!! Hilarity! Only a few will get this, I'm sure...only a few.

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  24. Dah!!!!!!!!!! like soooooo un Nigerian...pls get jokes that tend to soothe the cultural pallete!

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  25. Lol.....thank you Linda

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  26. This is the dumbest wife ever

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  27. LMFAO! Some mothers do have 'em!!!

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  28. Lolzzz big tym.

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  29. Very funny....laughing here.

    Whovever authored this piece is sure a bright one.

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  30. OMG this is so funny am so sure shes a wife brought from the village buh atleast they had honeymoon so he enjoyed before sufferING.....LOL LWKMD

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  31. oh my gosh! Some women are like dis o. Linda i hope u can cook beta dan dis bride

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  32. Hahahahaha.#DEAD#

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  33. oh my gosh! Some women are like dis o. Linda i hope u can cook beta dan dis bride

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  34. oh my gosh! Some women are like dis o. Linda i hope u can cook beta dan dis bride

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  35. This is A typical yoruba girl ... They are not intelligent and always dirty...gosh!!!

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    Replies
    1. Anofia!Ewu!

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    2. Chai! I weep for pple wey get you

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    3. Anu mpam! Wetin bring yoruba into this gist now? Akpa amu like u!

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  36. Had a good laugh! Especially loved the part where she "dressed" the chicken in doll dress and cute little doll shoes. LMAO indeed. Wonder who wrote it? Linda you should have included the credit for the piece. Hope we'll get more updates about the new iyawo's escapades.

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  37. This is a stolen article,nice one Lind,if u like don't post my comment! U sha stole it

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  38. Chuka aba nye go one chance

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  39. Chuka aba nye go one chance

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  40. =))º°˚˚˚°ºнaĦaнaº°˚˚˚°º‎​=)). Laughter has finished me ooooo. Wat a wife. Chuka is in 4 it 4 d rest of his life if he believes in 'for better, for worse principle'

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  41. Lol.

    Useless Iyawo. Chuka go soon kill person

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  42. Funniest piece i've read in a while. enjoyed every bit of still. still laughing.

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  43. Nna men, Chuka don marry wife oh!

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  44. Hehehehe, Lindiwe, this is hilarious, pls keep it rolling, some may take a hint or beat it........hahahaha!!!

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  45. This chick is a BOLO.....LMAO, hehe..first to comment

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  46. Yawns

    I'm sure you would post this one cos you don't post comments that criticize you.
    Anyway its your blog.


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  47. PrettyPrincess......3 January 2013 at 19:47

    omo ale lol

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  48. Buhahahah lindus biko...Lmsao

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  49. Very funny... All dos crazy cook books that makes cooking harder dan it ordinarily is... Big big grammar wey u neva hear b4... Tscheeeew

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  50. I m crackingmy ribs wt laughter. So funny.First to comment..*dancing*

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  51. Hahahahaha really funny piece lwkmd,ugo.m.

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  52. I really want to stop laughing but I can't.

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  53. This one pass stupidity. LOL.

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  54. LMSAO.....sillly bt funny

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  55. Hilarious!!!! This just made up for the stress of the whole day!!!

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  56. Heheheee.. Sori 4 d dude! Iyawo pls go 4 5yrs internship wit ur mom

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  57. Can only say "eeya" smh. Linda pls stop laughing it funny for the couple..

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  58. Really funny article!! Lovely

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  59. I yaff laff belle full.....she no practise 4 ha papa house 1st.....

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  60. Hahaha...! LMSAO! This is really funny. Maybe the recipe should be more specific. English no easy. Still LMSAO! CossyP

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  61. lmao. this is hilarious!!!

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  62. Heheheheeeeheeheheheee,,,dis one na JJC!!!

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  63. a very good laugh indeed

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  64. Lili is this suppose to be funny or what?I don't get.

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  65. lol linda this ish is funny pls upload more or give us the link to go find it cos i ant more of these diary sessions

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  66. Rosie Said......This is hilarious..
    ha ha ha,its nice sometimes to men a little "heart attack".

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  67. LMAO! Linda this so funny u most post my comment today,U know its a New year.

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  68. LMAO! Linda this so funny u most post my comment today,U know its a New year.

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  69. Really hilarious......LWKMD....check out ma new clothing collections ...ping 277DDBCD now

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  70. Dryyyyyyy*yawns*

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  71. Ahhhh,lwkmd. Thank u linda,dis just made ma day


    Flymoke

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  72. its very hilarious linda but its not very possible in real life

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  73. Dis is hillarious...L̳̿Ö̤̣̇☺ː̗̀(=)))ː̖́☺Ö̤̣̇L̳̿.

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  74. HahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahhaAAahhahahahahahhahahahahhahahahahhahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahah.linda like seriously???
    *effizy*

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  75. Lwtmb....I don die
    L̳̿☺Ö̤̣̇☺ː̗̀(=)))ː̖́☺Ö̤̣̇☺L̳̿.

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  76. Werrin be this? Iranu!

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  77. What masterpiece! ROTFL!!!

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  78. Quite boring.....ko tie funny

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  79. Laff iyaff finish me for hia ooo. Dat wife mst b a yoruba, u knw hw it is wen u directly translate yoruba 2 english.#winkingwinking#

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  80. Hahaha!
    Chuka,why you?

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  81. Yawns...boring!

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  82. Hillarious....rotflmao!

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  83. ℓ☺ℓ, tyt mumu. *Sallysparkles*

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  84. Lwkmd oooooooh... Omfg!!! D chicken part.. Chai! I cn imagine d hubby wishing it was a dream. Dat shud b d reason y he's counting.. Lmfaooooooo..!

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  85. Lol!quite funny!

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  86. Lwkmd.its so funny.hmm na wa oh.new iyawo

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  87. Is dis a joke or wot???????

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  88. Lol...so hilarious

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  89. OMG!!! Lmao...Α̲̅я̩̥̊ε̲̣̣̣̥ Ɣ☺ΰ F♠я̩̥̊ real..nyc 1 der jawe
    Post ma comment ��˚˚​˚ linda

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  90. Wat a new iyawo,d man go hear am'..hahahaha.
    dis one will give birth to the world's dumbest kids too.

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  91. So innocently clueless....lwkmd

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  92. Kai! Iyawooooooo,no kill your husband with dis your ways o,u just return from honeymoon o.but I pity d bros sha,loooool

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  93. OMG dis is so funny..LMAO.

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  94. ROFL! Anyways, what happened to Sunday?

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  95. Lol Linda abeg u 2 much haba u won kill pesin wt laugh o

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  96. This is so hilarious!! Linda, you didn't help ♍y cough at all. Pls, let this be weekly.

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  97. Dis is so funny !

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  98. Gosh i havent laughed this hard in a really loong time. Its so so so funny! Wat a new year comic relief!

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  99. Ha ha ha ha,I laugh tire lol so so funny...

    MIDE SPEAKS

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  100. hahahahaha...... Chuka don hear am o. Well sinc dey are bak frm honeymoon it means she's ok at **downtown** atlst he can b consoled wit dat at 9t afta eatn rubish as fud. Lollll

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  101. Doesn't make any sense to me!

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  102. It's funny..buh kinda applies to gals of nowadays....most of Dem are not good in cooking compared to their mothers.

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  103. It's a very funny piece but i got bored towards the end... Being plan stupid doesn't make a long story worth the read, a short, stupid and naive story will have us askin for more!!!!

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  104. Anonymous said...
    This is A typical yoruba girl ... They are not intelligent and always dirty...gosh!!!


    Your RETARDED self realizes this is a joke right?

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  105. Not funny jor. Just plain dumb.
    Nd d guy dat sed she is a yoruba girl is as dumb as fuck. Its just a stupid joke nd u must b a loony wretch dat cldnt get any girl 2 like u.

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  106. Heheeeeeeeee... See U̶̲̥̅̊Я life.I yaf die finish wit laf.chuks pele Ooº°˚˚˚°ºo . U̶̲̥̅̊‎​ are in big trouble

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  107. So he dinno if d woman he wantd 2marry cud cook or not.d groom himself is α zombie too.@funkiedipsy

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  108. o my word! this is real hilarious. I enjoyed the write up. very creative writing... im still laughing Linda..

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  109. Thank you Sonia, only a RETARDED FOOL will type that.

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  110. Oh! Such a pity... poor Chuka.

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  111. sunday is my fave followed by tuesday and wednesday

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  112. She really did try...poor poor husband! On a more serious note ppl, this is a joke and should be taken as one. No point getting your knickers in a twist and becoming abusive. But u sef Linda, you shouldn't be posting all these abusvie comments this year....make that your rules and regulations for the year.

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  113. lol,.....na d husband i pity

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  114. Linda, did you steal this for true? Please defend yourself because sometimes stories are just similar by coincidence.

    That is why JK Rowling won cases against her.
    If it was stolen! From who and where plus title?

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  115. Sounds like Linda experienced this first hand. *running for cover*

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Disclaimer: Opinions expressed in comments are those of the comment writers alone and does not reflect or represent the views of Linda Ikeji.

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