Diary of New Iyawo!! | Welcome to Linda Ikeji's Blog

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Thursday 3 January 2013

Diary of New Iyawo!!

  Something nice and fun! Enjoy...:-)
Monday: We are back from honeymoon and settled in our new home. It's fun to cook for Chuka . Today I made moin moin and the recipe said, 'Beat 12 eggs separately '. Well, I didn't have enough bowls to do that, so I had to borrow 12 bowls to beat the eggs in. D moin moin turned out fine though.
Tuesday: We wanted a fruit salad for supper. The recipe said, 'Serve without dressing'. So I didn't dress. But Chuka happened to bring a friend home for supper that night. They both looked so startled when I served them. I think it was the salad.
See more after the cut...
 
Wednesday: I decided to serve rice and found a recipe, which said, 'Wash thoroughly before steaming d rice'. So I heated some water and took a bath before steaming the rice. Sounded kind of silly in the middle of the day. I can't say it improved d rice anyhow. 
Thursday: Today Chuka asked for salad again. I tried a new recipe. It said, prepare ingredients, and then toss on a bed of lettuce one hour before serving.' I hunted all over the place for a garden with a bed of lettuce and when I got one, I tossed my salad into the bed of lettuce and stood over there for over one hour so the dog would not take it. CHUKA came over and asked if I felt all right. I wonder why? He must be stressed at work; I'll try and be supportive.
Friday: Today I found an easy recipe for cookies. It said, 'Put all ingredients in a bowl and beat it'. Beat it I did, to my mother's place. There must have been something wrong with the recipe, because when I came back home again; it looked the same as when I left it.
Saturday: Chuka went shoppin today and brought home a chicken. He asked me to dress it for Sunday. I'm sure I don't know how hens dress for Sunday. I never noticed back on the farm, but I found an old doll dress and its little cute shoes. I thought the hen looked really cute. When Chuka saw it, he started counting to ten. Either he was really stressed because of his work, or he wanted the chicken to dance. When I asked him what was wrong he started crying and shouting out 'Why me? Why me?'
LMAO!!
at 1/03/2013 06:20:00 pm

148 comments:

  1. GALORE3 January 2013 at 18:34

    a big YAWN............

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    Replies
    1. Ayo!3 January 2013 at 22:05

      You actually need common sense before you can have a sense of humour. Sorry

      Delete
  2. Onakachi3 January 2013 at 18:35

    Hahaha! I love what she did with the chicken.

    Onakachi.blogspot.com

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  3. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 18:39

    Too funny, what a wife, the husband is in trouble.

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  4. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 18:43

    Lololol too hilarious,who wrote this?would luv2read more!

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  5. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 18:43

    Hahaha...your mother's house is yours

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  6. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 18:47

    My tummyyyyyyy...
    Ds z way hilarious
    Buhahahahahahahahaha

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  7. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 18:47

    Linda wont kee us lmao

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  8. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 18:48

    Dis is d funniest shyt ever!!!! Hahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahaahahahhahahhahahhahahahahha!!!!!!!!!!

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  9. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 18:48

    Linda wont kee us. lmao

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  10. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 18:51

    Very funny

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  11. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 18:51

    Lmfaooooo...dumb wife

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  12. Dove3 January 2013 at 18:51

    O.M.Gosh!!! Can't stop laughin here. Linda pls dnt lemme laugh n kiss shoe shinner ooooo.
    1ndaful!!!

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  13. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 18:51

    Not funny jare

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  14. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 18:51

    Hilarious.... OMG!! Lmao

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  15. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 18:52

    LMAO!!! For all those who can't cook! Chuka pele.

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  16. goodie3 January 2013 at 18:52

    Hehehehehhehe...OMG!!.. Wic part of d bush is she frm Plz.. Lol

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  17. fikky3 January 2013 at 18:53

    Lmao. She for tie gele for the chicken too nah! Yeye wife. Lol.

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  18. vion3 January 2013 at 18:54

    Hahahaha

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  19. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 18:55

    She followed the instructions to the letter. Y was her husband sobbing???

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  20. Unknown3 January 2013 at 18:56

    Ha! Okay o

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  21. ★★PRINCE CHARMING™★★3 January 2013 at 18:56

    #Boring!!! #Yawning...

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    Replies
    1. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 21:54

      Idiot!!! Write your own lets see.

      Delete
    2. Ayo!3 January 2013 at 22:06

      LOL! I don't expect pple like you to actually relate...

      Delete
  22. Bootylycious diva3 January 2013 at 18:57

    Beautiful

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  23. pweety Lin3 January 2013 at 19:01

    Hahahahahaha..... Linda u no go kill person o...I Don laff sotay my bf dey check my pulse to make sure say I still normal.

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    Replies
    1. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 23:38

      Hahahaha....pulse dey change wit crase?...lool

      Delete
  24. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:06

    Lwfkmd

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  25. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:07

    Too Too funny. Tears are just streaming out of my eays

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  26. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:07

    I certainly feel for this guy!!!

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  27. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:08

    Too Too funny. Tears are just streaming out of my eyes

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  28. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:08

    LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!!!!! Hilarity! Only a few will get this, I'm sure...only a few.

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  29. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:09

    LOL

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  30. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:09

    Yawn

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  31. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:12

    Dah!!!!!!!!!! like soooooo un Nigerian...pls get jokes that tend to soothe the cultural pallete!

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  32. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:13

    LMAO

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  33. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:13

    Lol.....thank you Linda

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  34. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:14

    This is the dumbest wife ever

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  35. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:16

    LMFAO! Some mothers do have 'em!!!

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  36. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:16

    Lolzzz big tym.

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  37. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:17

    Very funny....laughing here.

    Whovever authored this piece is sure a bright one.

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  38. WONDERGAL3 January 2013 at 19:19

    OMG this is so funny am so sure shes a wife brought from the village buh atleast they had honeymoon so he enjoyed before sufferING.....LOL LWKMD

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  39. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:20

    Funny ishh

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  40. thenewslately3 January 2013 at 19:21

    oh my gosh! Some women are like dis o. Linda i hope u can cook beta dan dis bride

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  41. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:22

    Hahahahaha.#DEAD#

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  42. thenewslately3 January 2013 at 19:23

    oh my gosh! Some women are like dis o. Linda i hope u can cook beta dan dis bride

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  43. thenewslately3 January 2013 at 19:24

    oh my gosh! Some women are like dis o. Linda i hope u can cook beta dan dis bride

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  44. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:27

    This is A typical yoruba girl ... They are not intelligent and always dirty...gosh!!!

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    Replies
    1. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 21:59

      Anofia!Ewu!

      Delete
    2. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 22:08

      Chai! I weep for pple wey get you

      Delete
    3. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 23:55

      Anu mpam! Wetin bring yoruba into this gist now? Akpa amu like u!

      Delete
  45. Adele3 January 2013 at 19:28

    Had a good laugh! Especially loved the part where she "dressed" the chicken in doll dress and cute little doll shoes. LMAO indeed. Wonder who wrote it? Linda you should have included the credit for the piece. Hope we'll get more updates about the new iyawo's escapades.

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  46. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:31

    This is a stolen article,nice one Lind,if u like don't post my comment! U sha stole it

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  47. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:31

    For real.

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  48. ary3 January 2013 at 19:32

    Chuka aba nye go one chance

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  49. ary3 January 2013 at 19:32

    Chuka aba nye go one chance

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  50. ToluD3 January 2013 at 19:32

    =))º°˚˚˚°ºнaĦaнaº°˚˚˚°º‎​=)). Laughter has finished me ooooo. Wat a wife. Chuka is in 4 it 4 d rest of his life if he believes in 'for better, for worse principle'

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  51. Bubble gum3 January 2013 at 19:36

    Ha! lollll so hilarious!

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  52. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:38

    Lol.

    Useless Iyawo. Chuka go soon kill person

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  53. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:40

    Funniest piece i've read in a while. enjoyed every bit of still. still laughing.

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  54. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:42

    Nna men, Chuka don marry wife oh!

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  55. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:43

    Hehehehe, Lindiwe, this is hilarious, pls keep it rolling, some may take a hint or beat it........hahahaha!!!

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  56. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:45

    This chick is a BOLO.....LMAO, hehe..first to comment

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  57. truthurts3 January 2013 at 19:46

    Yawns

    I'm sure you would post this one cos you don't post comments that criticize you.
    Anyway its your blog.


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  58. PrettyPrincess......3 January 2013 at 19:47

    omo ale lol

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  59. Coco3 January 2013 at 19:51

    Buhahahah lindus biko...Lmsao

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  60. Ennieblaq3 January 2013 at 19:52

    Very funny... All dos crazy cook books that makes cooking harder dan it ordinarily is... Big big grammar wey u neva hear b4... Tscheeeew

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  61. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:56

    I m crackingmy ribs wt laughter. So funny.First to comment..*dancing*

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  62. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:57

    Hahahahaha really funny piece lwkmd,ugo.m.

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  63. Daizyyyy3 January 2013 at 19:57

    I really want to stop laughing but I can't.

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  64. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:57

    This one pass stupidity. LOL.

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  65. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:58

    LMSAO.....sillly bt funny

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  66. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 19:59

    Hilarious!!!! This just made up for the stress of the whole day!!!

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  67. Unknown3 January 2013 at 20:00

    Heheheee.. Sori 4 d dude! Iyawo pls go 4 5yrs internship wit ur mom

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  68. OSBAG3 January 2013 at 20:04

    Can only say "eeya" smh. Linda pls stop laughing it funny for the couple..

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  69. barbie3 January 2013 at 20:08

    Really funny article!! Lovely

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  70. mara3 January 2013 at 20:08

    I yaff laff belle full.....she no practise 4 ha papa house 1st.....

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  71. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 20:10

    Hahaha...! LMSAO! This is really funny. Maybe the recipe should be more specific. English no easy. Still LMSAO! CossyP

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  72. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 20:10

    lmao. this is hilarious!!!

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  73. Dirty Diana...3 January 2013 at 20:11

    LOL!!!

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  74. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 20:11

    Heheheheeeeheeheheheee,,,dis one na JJC!!!

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  75. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 20:12

    Lol nice one.

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  76. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 20:16

    a very good laugh indeed

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  77. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 20:22

    Lili is this suppose to be funny or what?I don't get.

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  78. Unknown3 January 2013 at 20:22

    lol linda this ish is funny pls upload more or give us the link to go find it cos i ant more of these diary sessions

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  79. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 20:26

    Rosie Said......This is hilarious..
    ha ha ha,its nice sometimes to men a little "heart attack".

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  80. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 20:33

    LMAO! Linda this so funny u most post my comment today,U know its a New year.

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  81. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 20:33

    LMAO! Linda this so funny u most post my comment today,U know its a New year.

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  82. Stanley Onduru3 January 2013 at 20:39

    Really hilarious......LWKMD....check out ma new clothing collections ...ping 277DDBCD now

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  83. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 20:42

    Wow

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  84. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 20:43

    Dryyyyyyy*yawns*

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  85. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 20:46

    Ahhhh,lwkmd. Thank u linda,dis just made ma day


    Flymoke

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  86. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 20:54

    its very hilarious linda but its not very possible in real life

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  87. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 20:55

    Dis is hillarious...L̳̿Ö̤̣̇☺ː̗̀(=)))ː̖́☺Ö̤̣̇L̳̿.

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  88. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 20:55

    HahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahhaAAahhahahahahahhahahahahhahahahahhahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahah.linda like seriously???
    *effizy*

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  89. Suavilicious3 January 2013 at 20:55

    Lwtmb....I don die
    L̳̿☺Ö̤̣̇☺ː̗̀(=)))ː̖́☺Ö̤̣̇☺L̳̿.

    ReplyDelete
  90. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 20:56

    Werrin be this? Iranu!

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  91. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 20:57

    Loool

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  92. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 21:01

    What masterpiece! ROTFL!!!

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  93. Damie3 January 2013 at 21:02

    Quite boring.....ko tie funny

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  94. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 21:04

    Meaning?

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  95. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 21:06

    Laff iyaff finish me for hia ooo. Dat wife mst b a yoruba, u knw hw it is wen u directly translate yoruba 2 english.#winkingwinking#

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  96. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 21:06

    Hahaha!
    Chuka,why you?

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  97. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 21:09

    Lwkmd

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  98. IMF S.3 January 2013 at 21:12

    Boring!!!

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  99. Oge okoye3 January 2013 at 21:12

    Funny

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  100. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 21:18

    Yawns...boring!

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  101. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 21:19

    Hillarious....rotflmao!

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  102. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 21:24

    ℓ☺ℓ, tyt mumu. *Sallysparkles*

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  103. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 21:24

    Lwkmd oooooooh... Omfg!!! D chicken part.. Chai! I cn imagine d hubby wishing it was a dream. Dat shud b d reason y he's counting.. Lmfaooooooo..!

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  104. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 21:26

    Lol!quite funny!

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  105. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 21:27

    Lwkmd.its so funny.hmm na wa oh.new iyawo

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  106. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 21:28

    Is dis a joke or wot???????

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  107. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 21:29

    Lol...so hilarious

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  108. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 21:32

    Lol!!

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  109. Unknown3 January 2013 at 21:37

    OMG!!! Lmao...Α̲̅я̩̥̊ε̲̣̣̣̥ Ɣ☺ΰ F♠я̩̥̊ real..nyc 1 der jawe
    Post ma comment ��˚˚​˚ linda

    ReplyDelete
  110. Queen Bee3 January 2013 at 21:38

    Wat a new iyawo,d man go hear am'..hahahaha.
    dis one will give birth to the world's dumbest kids too.

    ReplyDelete
  111. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 21:40

    So innocently clueless....lwkmd

    ReplyDelete
  112. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 21:44

    Kai! Iyawooooooo,no kill your husband with dis your ways o,u just return from honeymoon o.but I pity d bros sha,loooool

    ReplyDelete
  113. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 21:45

    *blank stare*

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  114. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 21:45

    OMG dis is so funny..LMAO.

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  115. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 21:54

    ROFL! Anyways, what happened to Sunday?

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  116. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 22:04

    Lol Linda abeg u 2 much haba u won kill pesin wt laugh o

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  117. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 22:10

    This is so hilarious!! Linda, you didn't help ♍y cough at all. Pls, let this be weekly.

    ReplyDelete
  118. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 22:11

    Dis is so funny !

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  119. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 22:37

    Gosh i havent laughed this hard in a really loong time. Its so so so funny! Wat a new year comic relief!

    ReplyDelete
  120. Unknown3 January 2013 at 22:46

    Ha ha ha ha,I laugh tire lol so so funny...

    MIDE SPEAKS

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  121. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 22:48

    Lmao!

    ReplyDelete
  122. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 23:05

    hahahahaha...... Chuka don hear am o. Well sinc dey are bak frm honeymoon it means she's ok at **downtown** atlst he can b consoled wit dat at 9t afta eatn rubish as fud. Lollll

    ReplyDelete
  123. Anonymous3 January 2013 at 23:55

    Doesn't make any sense to me!

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  124. hayahy3 January 2013 at 23:59

    It's funny..buh kinda applies to gals of nowadays....most of Dem are not good in cooking compared to their mothers.

    ReplyDelete
  125. Gozie4 January 2013 at 00:24

    It's a very funny piece but i got bored towards the end... Being plan stupid doesn't make a long story worth the read, a short, stupid and naive story will have us askin for more!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  126. sonia4 January 2013 at 00:44

    Anonymous said...
    This is A typical yoruba girl ... They are not intelligent and always dirty...gosh!!!


    Your RETARDED self realizes this is a joke right?

    ReplyDelete
  127. Anonymous4 January 2013 at 02:27

    Not funny jor. Just plain dumb.
    Nd d guy dat sed she is a yoruba girl is as dumb as fuck. Its just a stupid joke nd u must b a loony wretch dat cldnt get any girl 2 like u.

    ReplyDelete
  128. towyeen4 January 2013 at 04:05

    Heheeeeeeeee... See U̶̲̥̅̊Я life.I yaf die finish wit laf.chuks pele Ooº°˚˚˚°ºo . U̶̲̥̅̊‎​ are in big trouble

    ReplyDelete
  129. Anonymous4 January 2013 at 07:22

    Dry

    ReplyDelete
  130. Osefamen Gloria4 January 2013 at 08:12

    So he dinno if d woman he wantd 2marry cud cook or not.d groom himself is α zombie too.@funkiedipsy

    ReplyDelete
  131. Nneka4 January 2013 at 09:26

    o my word! this is real hilarious. I enjoyed the write up. very creative writing... im still laughing Linda..

    ReplyDelete
  132. TKM4 January 2013 at 09:27

    Thank you Sonia, only a RETARDED FOOL will type that.

    ReplyDelete
  133. Anonymous4 January 2013 at 09:29

    Oh! Such a pity... poor Chuka.

    ReplyDelete
  134. Anonymous4 January 2013 at 09:44

    sunday is my fave followed by tuesday and wednesday

    ReplyDelete
  135. Anonymous4 January 2013 at 09:47

    She really did try...poor poor husband! On a more serious note ppl, this is a joke and should be taken as one. No point getting your knickers in a twist and becoming abusive. But u sef Linda, you shouldn't be posting all these abusvie comments this year....make that your rules and regulations for the year.

    ReplyDelete
  136. Clement E Ighomue4 January 2013 at 13:50

    alright!

    ReplyDelete
  137. Stargal4 January 2013 at 14:00

    lol,.....na d husband i pity

    ReplyDelete
  138. Anonymous4 January 2013 at 16:23

    Linda, did you steal this for true? Please defend yourself because sometimes stories are just similar by coincidence.

    That is why JK Rowling won cases against her.
    If it was stolen! From who and where plus title?

    ReplyDelete
  139. Anonymous4 January 2013 at 16:53

    LOL :)

    ReplyDelete
  140. Anonymous5 January 2013 at 09:57

    Sounds like Linda experienced this first hand. *running for cover*

    ReplyDelete

Disclaimer: Opinions expressed in comments are those of the comment writers alone and does not reflect or represent the views of Linda Ikeji.

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