I'm a 25 year old lady. I met my fiance (31 yrs) in July last year and we are set to marry by January. We got talking and he told me the last time he had sex was June with his ex in her fiance's house.
The girl had her wedding in December. She was heavily pregnant and by march she gave birth to a baby boy. My fiance told me all this and being the curious person that I am, I had to search for her on Facebook and I added her. I'm always checking out her pictures and all just out of curiosity. She puts up a picture of that baby monthly which shows his growth but I had to check out the pix today and I immediately saw my fiance's carbon copy. The baby looks so much like him.My bf has a particular shape of head and this baby has it too. His mouth, nose, all the facial features are the same with my bf. And putting two and two together there's every evidence that this baby is my fiance's.
Right now I'm confused. I feel hurt, my conscience won't let me be. I feel the urge to let the lady know that I know. And I also pity her hubby, taking care of a child that is not his. The baby doesn't even look a bit like him. Once you see my bf and the baby, you will think he vomited him.
I'm just too confused right now, I don't know what to do. I love this guy very much and I want to marry him but my heart is really shattered by all what I saw. I'm sure this girl too knows that dis baby is my fiance's. Whats the solution now??
No big deal
ReplyDeleteAsk your boyfriend 1st..he might be honest if you confront him with the facts..
ReplyDeleteMy dear,think twice b4 u marry ur bf coz if u do,u mite end up regretting.the child will look for his father one day.r u sure u can bear d consequences wen the tym comes???think about it very very well.
ReplyDeletemy dear mind ur biz if u truly love dis guy
ReplyDeleteNa wa...nsogbu uwa, na diff kind fever na I'm dey ds life
ReplyDeleteJune to march ain 10mnths get a grip!wot u see is wot u xpect
ReplyDeleteYea, june to march aint 10 months, it nine actually! Isiaki!
DeleteDon't marry him if u don't. Want to be miserable for d rest of ur married life wiit him... If he cld still slp wit his ex in her fiance's house enuf to knock her up and d gal giving d child to d current hubbyy, one all dis things will be revealed and u myt be at d loose end. Smtimes love isn't enuf for marriage, loyalty, trust and a God-fearing mate plays a role. All these he doesn't have. Wish u d best.
ReplyDeleteA man who can sleep with his ex who is engaged to be married is bad enof, so imagine when said man has sex with his ex in her fiance's house, probably on his bed(soon to be their matrimonial bed)!!! Urrrghh! Dat's at least 50 shades of sleaze!!! It shows d true colours of ur guy! My dear dat baby is d least of ur worries, u seem to be ignoring d white elephant azonto-ing in d room...d character of ur beloved! Is dat d kind of man u want to be with 4 d rest of ur life n probably pass on some of his genes to ur babies???
DeleteYOU ARE VERY STUPID, YOU KNOW WHY? YOUR SO CALLED FIANCE TOLD YOU HE HAD SEX LAST IN JUNE AND STARTED DATING YOU IN JULY, DID HE TELL YOU THAT SOMEBODY IS PREGNANT FOR HIM? WHY ARE YOU SO CURIOUS THAT HER EX - FRIEND 'S BABY IS YOUR FIANCE 'S CHILD, I WILL ADVICE YOU, MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS ,IF YOU DONT LIKE YOUR FIANCE ANYMORE, GIVE SPACE FOR ANOTHER PERSON TO FILL THE GAP, DONT DESTROY ANOTHER WOMANS MARRIAGE BECAUSE IT WAS ORDAINED BY GOD. IF YOU WANT TO DEVELOP HIGH-BLOOD -PRESSURE, CONTINUE PUTTING YOUR MOUTH IN WHAT DOES NOT CONCERNS YOU, IF YOU DESTROY THE WOMANS MARRIAGE BY YOUR SO CALLED CURIOSITY, I BET YOU, YOU WILL KNOW NO PEACE.
ReplyDeleteMadam/sir, i saw a pic of a teenage girl on my bf's phone.. I askd him about the gurl, dodged the question..i had to check the pic again,my dear, i saw the guy in the pic, more like he vomited the girl..immediately he came got back, i jst told him, "hey,i knw this girl is your daughter" and he replied "yes" that's my girl in america..sometimes, it's gud to dig..sweetie, confront him jare..
Delete@immaculate... Dats a brilliant word of advice, d girl is so stupid and also a fool
DeleteBe bold enough to tell your fiance of what you know.If your heart is no longer in the relationship, it is better for you to move on, instead of keeping hurt inside. There is the probability, the child may not belong to your fiance. I will advice you stay clear of the other lady's affair. She is married, let her be.
ReplyDeleteSis.
ReplyDeleteThe lady with these stuff is confused... But I'd tell her to grab him fast...Cos there's no time...
Let the lady know bout the "kid issue" and move on with ur marriage...
Kindly, visit: http://www.chiboychuks.blogspot.com
Stupidity is when ur searching for wat is not lost...dats how u pple spoil d good things u hv..why addin ur fiance's ex....after knowin the lady is married..let her face her life and if its dat she gave ur fiance's baby to the other guy..let God judge..
ReplyDeleteThe solution is marry him if you really want to marry him. The More u do research about him the more you harm yourself.
ReplyDeleteU better let sleeping dog sleep very well,infact kill it and marry ur guy,dia's no perfect relationship
ReplyDeleteThat's Ūя head ache..
ReplyDeleteWell, I think she should just confront him and have a reasonable talk with him. It's a huge responsibility to take care of that child on the long run though. Be prayerful and alert my dear...
ReplyDeleteu ask for it miss i too sabi, why not let thins be???? If u luv him and he luvs u truely, why would u go spyin for trouble?? Pls leave child alone and get urself busy wit ur marriage. Gudluck
ReplyDeletecuriosity kills d cat, u got wat u whr lukin 4... go ahead nd marry ur man. the resemblance might b a coincidence or u ova thinking thins.
ReplyDeleteFoolish and insecure girl! ¶ hv jst one advice for u....don't take that silly and childish mindset into marriage if u want U̶̲̥̅̊r marriage to last! And for goodness sake,mind U̶̲̥̅̊r fucking business!
ReplyDeleteComfront him with the issue and ask him very serious questions,he might open up and if he keeps denying just take it that way and accept the fact that its just your immagination.PS seek the face of God,he won't mislead you.
ReplyDeletemarry ur bf, shit happens. u r nt even 100percent sure the child is his..
ReplyDeleteNa you find trouble by poking into his ex life. You for take him as he is
ReplyDeleteAbeg park well....
ReplyDeletegirl chillax marry the guy he did u no wrong, the ex dat kept the preg shld b blamed, datz if is nt 4 her hubby.. u r just assuming#
ReplyDeleteu amaze me #seriously.. berra marry ur bf.
ReplyDeletehmmmmm.. na wa 2 u
ReplyDeletepolice station far from your house
ReplyDeleteLOL! @ particular shape of head.
ReplyDeleteHe may not be aware, advice him to go for a DNA test ..... Dazzling
ReplyDeleteHe may not be aware, advice him to go for a DNA test ..... Dazzling
ReplyDeleteShit happens! Get a rip on yourself and take charge of your life. The truth is, you will never find anything good when you eavesdrop. I believe you should ask your Bf and clear the air. Good luck !!!
ReplyDeleteFace d truth n tell ur fiance (dats if he doest already kno)...... Wot will b will be
ReplyDeleteDis is serious o...na wa
ReplyDeleteIts not your battle pls, the evil that people do lives with them. Don't blow the trumpet. As Long as you fiance slept with her before meeting you,you shouldn't feel hurt or cheated on.
ReplyDeleteSuch stories scare me of the type of women around, "The wife material factor in some ladies is not even to sew even a G-string" #JustSaying
Yeh the man slept with a soon to be wife .. Asif she raped him mcheew
Delete#Typo: The wife material factor in some ladies is not even enough to sew a G-string! Smh..... So sad, just months to your wedding and you still having sex with your ex, how many other innocent men out there are fathering sons that are not theirs?
Delete@ prince charming, and the husband material in some guys aint enough to sew a bow tie..
DeleteWait a minute y'all! Please am I d only 1 who sees d character of d writer's fiance as a major issue??? Oh! Just bcos he hadn't met her then makes it ok? I'm stunned! No wonder marriages break per second nowadays! U see a major red flag n u still wanna dive in head long? It's scary how emotions can make women lower their standards! Dat he slept with his ex is not d issue, d VENUE they shagged n d fact dat he knew she's engaged to sm oda dude!!! Doesn't dat count for anything??? Oh! 9ja my beloved country! later down d line wen he starts shagging women on ur matrimonial bed including ur female relatives who are game, u'll start calling it manipulation n running 4rm church to church! This is a clear case of MENE MENE TEKEL UPHARSIN!(Not d meaning oh! But dat d writing is on d wall) sista borrow NEKS' 3D glasses n read d writing on ur wall.
DeleteI love dis
DeleteOh girl find ur way if u can not live wit that.
ReplyDeleteDig deeper and ask him....bt tinz D̶̲̥̅̊ε̲̣̣̣̥γ̲̣̣̥ hapn sha
ReplyDeleteYou know too well what to do. i wonder why you want to live forever in denial of the truth. confront the now that you have the opportunity.
ReplyDeleteMissy lemme analyse your problem for you.
ReplyDelete1) He slept with her in June, and met and started dating you in July - How is that your business?
2) You searched and added her on FB and still check up on her pix - Why? Does your fiance investigate your past life or do you think you're perfect? You are just jealous of her! You are insecured period! Stop stalking the poor lady invest that time into your fiance, or better still be planing your wedding.
3) You pity her husband because he's raising another man's kid - My dear tell yourself the truth you don't. You're simply so jealous and bitter that You are not the mother of your fiance's first son (that's if he's really he's son) that conscience you think is bothering you is simply bitterness in the pit of your belly.
4) You want to confront her - why? Did you do a DNA test to be sure? NO, once again you are so jealous of her and you think this is an oppotunity for you to rubb in her face that you're better than her (insecurity) its not your business don't go and spoil other people's marriage when you're not married yet! Somebody will spoil yours!
5) If you're so worried confront your fiance (do so at your own peril,he won't be too happy to know you've been snooping about he's past) tell him what you think and settle with him.
On a last note my dear you aint ready for marriage because you strike me as someone who doesn't let go of the past and mistakes you can't have that in a marriage, sit and really ask yourself if you are really ready for marriage.
Beautiful response.
DeleteThankyou
Billie Jean
When it comes to matters of the heart, it gets really compicated becos @ the end of the day u will still do what ur heart is telling you. I wish u good luck.
DeleteMrs Okafor,u said it all. This girl(not lady) is still a girl. She is not ready for marriage one bit.
DeleteBringing your ex to your fiance house and having sex with him right there! Women!!!
ReplyDeleteOk jst do wot ur hrt tell u 2 do ok, leave him n find sum1 else or marry him.
ReplyDeleteGet married!
ReplyDeleteIf only men knew the rampant CHEATING that is going on among wifes , they will Faint . Its happening so commonly and so many married men are raising other people children unknowningly ..m
ReplyDeleteTalking from experience, me too I got pregnant for someone else, but had an abortion. That would have been too risky not knwing if its for my husband or my ex. I am older and wise now . No more cheating
thats deep. sorry babes
ReplyDeleteMy dear, your bf has a baby or not does not matter, what matters most is d love you have for each other..... D ex in quote is happy with her new found love, why bug your self over nothing? Just go on with you wedding plans babes!
ReplyDeleteif u love him, follow ur heart like a true believer.
ReplyDeletePlease leave the lady and her family alone. Do not destroy that family OK. Maybe you should show that picture to your fiance, after all he confessed to you about the June meeting.
ReplyDeleteWhich kind thing be this now? You sef eh, curiosity kills the cat o. That lady is legally married now so, I think the baby is her husband's child. *Over want to know no good sometimes o.* Just show the pic to your fiance first.
Incomplete details. Upload your fiancé's & the baby's pictures for us to see; Your evidence is inconclusive. We need to be sure you know. You don't want us making comments/judgements based on prejudice & primordial sentiments :-)
ReplyDeleteI concur
DeleteHmmmn!!!!! dis s really a very critical issue,Don't even knw the advice 2 gv her.Oso si mi lenu obu iyo si.
ReplyDeleteHehehehe
ReplyDeleteU 've looked for trouble,home u re satisfied now. It's not your place to tell either her or your husband . Wishing u the best of luck as this ll be on ur conscience.
Hmmmn!!!!! dis s really a very critical issue,Don't even knw the advice 2 gv her.Oso si mi lenu obu iyo si.
ReplyDeleteConfront ur bF not d girl , u hav no business wit d girl but ur bf , nd if u truli love him u wud suport him all d way cos he mite not know if he has a child sef.
ReplyDeleteMadam mind ur business,
ReplyDeleteguess u dint get d answer u wanted on ladun's blog, female detective,u either tell ur fiance or keep quiet
ReplyDeleteI think d first thing to do is talk to your fiance to know if he's aware and before you do anytin drastic, make sure its not based on assumption nd how are you so sure d husband of dis lady doesn't know the baby isn't his... But in all things, acquire wisdom
ReplyDeleteTalk †̥☺ ur fince about it. Tell him †̥☺ u the truth
ReplyDeleteDid your husband tell you he has a kid somewhere. Women will never learn their lesson, is facing ur marriage squarely not enof work for you than hunting for things that †ђξ result will shatter you? Cancel your wedding & wait for next turn. N̶̲̥̅̊α curiosity dey kill cat & u r on ur own
ReplyDeleteWhat's ur own? Y nt face ur own buisness than digging up trouble that's sitting down jeje. D lady is married n u also u re set to marry so why do u wanna destroy ur affair with ur hands? Is d baby or d mamma disturbing u? Go n park well jare n stop asking foolish question. When u ain't a dunce or dummy
ReplyDeleteTo the ladies in the house and guys who are updated...plz wat other pregnancy preventing drug can my partner use apart 4rm postinor.cos i heard dat excess use of postinor can b damaging to the womb.i b glad if am told d name of d drugs.
ReplyDeletePls be carefull o, don't go and destroy someone's else home. I will advise u shut ur mouth and if u knw it will affect ur relationship with ur man, then think twice nw dat u yet to get married.
ReplyDeleteThe person who shuld be asking questions is ur fiance and not u. Its left for her to tell her hubby d truth, no go spoil person marriage bcos ur curiousty no let u rest. Abeg. Biko nu
ReplyDeleteMy dear jst 4get abt d past n move forward
ReplyDeleteFirstly, does ur bf know he is d father of d child u claim is his carbon copy? Secondly, as they always say, curiousity kills the cat. U shouldn't have gone so deep into his past just cuz u were or are insecure knowing what men are capable of doing. Lastly, I dnt think u will want to spoil a marriage that hasn't clocked a year cuz of what u think without proof. Well, my advice is for u to either let sleeping dogs lie or u jokingly bring d issue up about his ex and going to visit her with ur man thereby telling him "UNINTENTIONALLY" what u think about d child's resemblance and see how it goes bt think twice before u act.
ReplyDeleteUr a bastard. U want 2 tell who what. Mind ur fucking business. How r u so sure its ur fiance's child, r u God or a doctor. Bitch....face ur own life n born ur own.
ReplyDeleteSolution-Learn to mind your business
ReplyDeleteAsk Bonario, he has all the witty answers.
ReplyDeleteWhy are u drinking alabuko for another person headache?mind ur bizness aand marry ur fiance.concentrate on ur marriage.
ReplyDeleteWow!well,I feel u shud do wat is right.confront both ur man,n his ex.tell dem u knw,and if u feel ur wiillin to still marry him despite d child,dats ur decision.its best d truth comes out nw than later.d truth is rily hard.its ur choice to decide on wat path to follow.
ReplyDeleteMy dear first ask urself what u stand to gain in all these?
ReplyDeleteOf what benefit will it be to u if d husband gets to share dis ur view?
Are u seeking d paternity of d baby for d true love u've for ur fiancee or u're being pushed by jealousy?
Owk if d baby happens to be dat of ur fiancee will u take care of d baby as ur own?
I don't understand why some people prefer fight to quarrel. I suggest u let d sleeping dog lie. What u don't know won't hurt.
Now u've murdered sleep,and u sleep no more. I advice u leave d woman and her happy family alone.
~BONARIO~says so via NOKIA3310
Madam mind your own business, your boyfriend's married ex isn't your concern. So please focus on your relationship.
ReplyDeletei dont think you should feel angry about it. For one he did confess to having sex with her so the after effects could have happened. If you love him then marry him.
ReplyDeleteLady a/b guy.
At 25 you should be busy exploring ur fiance capacity on bed not checking on his ex pictures on facebook.
ReplyDeleteI tire
DeleteI tire
DeleteIf what you'r assuming is true, I guess you haven't thought of the fact that your BF might not even know he's a baby daddy..YET! I guess you could be the one to tell him the good news. On the other hand, she might have been pregnant for her hubby already (with or without knowing); obviously, people have sex even men in pregnancy. So I suggest you just give it a rest. If there's any connection, it'l eventually come out. 'Cos ultimately, there's nothing hidden under the sun. The worst that could come of out of this scenario is having a step son.
ReplyDeleteThe truth u re very silly and immature that is what u get when u snoop around. U will lose the truth of ur husband and I he he leaves u. Y re u sorry for the gal's husband, is it ur business. Mind ur business, itS ur nosiness that makes u Think he is the baby's father. Is she was never pregnant when they dated so y would she be pregnant that last time. Gals like u get hurt cos u re To nosey and stare up trouble.
ReplyDeleteRun away....
ReplyDeleteOMG,everytime ladies shock me,u find this out and the thing u r talking about is confronting the lady? R u dumb?! U r supposed to be talking to ur fiance about this,even putting ur wedding on hold till everything is clarified,r u going into a marraige knowing that its a possibility that ur hubby fathered a child elsewhere,without confirming it and seeing if u can live with that,what is ur concern with the ex? Shuld that be the problem? You are very funny?!!! U r leaving who u r supposed to be speaking to and going to speak to whom doesn't concern u,this is why men insult us,u catch ur partner cheating,u go ahead to fight or reign insults on the lady,like she owes u any committment,guising ur foolishness under the umbrella of love,my dear open ur two eyes and look b4 u leap..
ReplyDeleteYou're stalking your boyfriend's ex on facebook cos he told you he slept with her once? Y'all are a bunch of sick people. That's all i've got to say.
ReplyDeleteConfront ur BF then let the ex know u know. Kawai !
ReplyDeleteThe solution is for you stfu and go and plan your wedding,wtf is wrong with u?Do u have any idea how many lives u want to render useless?So bcos ur bf had sex with her means what?If u arent a fool why stalking d ex who is married now with a child,you for paste the pikin pic and ur bf mk we help u decide,olodo
ReplyDeleteMan I am looking forward to the comments on this one. This is one of those stories where the gbosas are just too much.
ReplyDelete1. Why were you torturing yourself by facebook stalking your fiance's ex? Don't you trust him? and what would it help?
2. Does your fiance know that the kid could possibly be his? Surely, the first person you should speak to is him and then together you can decide whether to broach the subject with the other couple.
3. If your fiance doesn't know, don't be to harsh on him. If he does...update Libers you may need further 'advice'.
Good luck
How do you know the baby belongs to your fiance? Is your Eye a paternity test machine? Plsss
ReplyDeleteJANETTY
Sweetie I have some things to tell you
ReplyDelete1.You probably shouldn't marry your fiance bcos u don't trust him at all
2.You Are Insecure. You really need to work on yourself now cos your insecurities are gonna kill you someday
3. You seem a serial killer cos you've stalked the hell outta this girl. Damn girl, You've so concerned yourself with her that I feel your imaginations are playing a sharp one on you.you're now seeing your guy in her baby. You really don't have an issue here, you are what you think your problem is.
LIVIA
*dead* lmao
DeleteDear fiancé ..
ReplyDeleteAt this point u r judging based on ur visual ability and ur knowledge of their(ur bf and his ex-) carnal relation
You need more evidence to conclude on the paternity of the lady's kid..
There is something I know abt babies, they can look like whoever you might want to attritube their looks but time would definitely tell plus a proper paternity test would end d episode..
My dear I know u r hurt but get u hv a wedding to plan and u hv a relation to nurture don't focus on facts/clues that wld take u back instead of forging ahead.. Goodluck!
*whew*
Wahala owaaaaa... It has happened. Serious matter oh! It remind me of how I played detective with my ex in sch, found out he slept wit hia frnd GF who is suppose to be a common frnd. I was hurt, I felt like going to d guy to expose both my ex and d gurl but had a change of mind cos d guy was about to marry d gurl and she also claimed born agn that same period,and they eventually did get married a year after. But I did confront my ex wit it and he was speechless and scared like a chicken beged me not to speakout becos of their relatnship. Smtime our curiousity does cause more harm and good. Nw what ll u do? Break d married and lose a chance of been married as well? But ladies!!! Why didn't she abort when she wasn't sure. Everything that happened in d dark has come to light thru u curious cat.
ReplyDeleteWell, ...... Da Ball is in ur Court! Do u need a Husband or a Saint? Atleast he was honest enough 2 have told U he did had Sex with his Ex. What else do u want 2 dig?
ReplyDeletePls jst stay out of it is non of ur biz o
ReplyDeleteWhy are you confused ?. it has nothing to do with you
ReplyDeleteSo we should all jumb the third mainland bridge abi. All u gals are all ashawos having babies for a different man in ur husbands house. God have mercy
ReplyDeleteU c were curiosity hs landed u 2! U Luv dis man nd u want 2 be wt him its 2ru dt u need 2 make some find out 2 no who ur man is. Bt my Dear u went too far so far d oda lady is married dt alone is enof 4 u 2 relax instead u went on digging in 2 tin u r nt supposed 2 no. Bliv u me if ur guy do e thorough findings abt u there r things he may find out dt may make him change his heart ova settling wt u. So just pretend as if u never no dis nd move ahead if u still want d guy otherwise swallow it nd work away don't brake someone's home
ReplyDeleteHave this discussion with Ųя bf/fiance. He myt not even be of the know. Let him be the one to confront his ex.
ReplyDeletePoor girl,she shld let her bf know about it dts if he isn't aware already.
ReplyDeleteChai no good gal to marry again this dayz. How can a good man be nursing another man child. Me can never I would just roast u alive.tufiakwa
ReplyDeleteBabe,if u love dis guy,tell him straight up and see how he reacts,if he acknowledges his mistakes and apologizes to you,then his regretting what he did,but if he flares up with you,my dear,let the marriage go afterall you wud av been doing him a favour by making your own child his second child on earth.take heart,can feel your pain.
ReplyDeleteI tink u shd have a sincere talk wit ur fiance and find out if he knows abt d baby..if he does find out if he wants 2 claim d baby and if he dosnt well...2 of u shd conclude on wat u want 2 do abt d baby..if u truly luv him u wld stay wit him and accept d baby afterall it happen b4 u met him..evri relatnshp encounters obstacles and its our ability to overcome dem and forge ahead that makes it worthwhile..pls don't make a decision witout talkin to ur fiance or considering the innocent baby...wish u all d best.
ReplyDeletei do not fancy girls like this, adding her on facebook and all isnt needed you are already stuck up in looking for shit and you aren't married yet,i bet you would add all the girls he has ever being with and look out for their children and come up with another story, your are 25, you better learn to stop finding shit or else,you will spend the next 25 looking for shit and guess what it ends up in nothing but unhappiness.
ReplyDeleteMarriage is enternity on earth,make a wise decision b4 its late. Knw d diff btw luv nd lust.mind u ova curiousity kills d cat.d less u knw abt smtins in r!shp d longer nd happier of dt r!shp.
ReplyDeleteIf u really love this guy like u claim,u wouldnt go d lenght u did to unearth dirt that shuld be left buried. Now u know something that has thrown u into confusion and ur world upside down. What next? He slept wit her b4 he met u,probably doesnt even know that act resulted in anything. U've ruined whatever chance at happiness u had with dis guy. Just move on, cos u wont be at peace with urself or him if u go ahead to marry him! And remember,u brought dis upon yaself
ReplyDeleteTell ur fiance about the baby
ReplyDeletey. am sure he does'nt eben know. start from there...
*even
ReplyDeleteShey oyibo ppl talk am say curiosity kills d cat,,№ω u don c am. i pity u dear,, i ₪☹ ₪☹ W̶̲̥̅̊e̶̲̥̅̊t̶̲̥̅̊i̶̲̥̅̊n̶̲̥̅̊ 2 advice again..kpele shaa,,its well. NEXT!!!
ReplyDeleteTell him simple!
ReplyDeleteI think you r human to feel d way u do and want to talk to the lady but pause a minute and think again, WHAT IF THE HUBBY KNWS?WHAT IF HE IS IMPOTENT AND THAT'S THEIR ONLY HOPE FOR A CHILD? For you, tink of it like ur bf had a child before u met him and just live ur life and move on. U may confront ur bf with the issue and see his reaction but if am to advice, i will say u pretend like u want his opinion on a frd's problem but b vigilant and watch his facial expressions dat way, u will get ur answer to knw if its wise to come out clean or not. Be happy all the same.
ReplyDeleteI think you r human to feel d way u do and want to talk to the lady but pause a minute and think again, WHAT IF THE HUBBY KNWS?WHAT IF HE IS IMPOTENT AND THAT'S THEIR ONLY HOPE FOR A CHILD? For you, tink of it like ur bf had a child before u met him and just live ur life and move on. U may confront ur bf with the issue and see his reaction but if am to advice, i will say u pretend like u want his opinion on a frd's problem but b vigilant and watch his facial expressions dat way, u will get ur answer to knw if its wise to come out clean or not. Be happy all the same.
ReplyDeleteserious wahala..but some ladies sha, sleeping with ur ex in ur FIANCEE's house, smh..nkan be.
ReplyDeleteMind ur business! Don't take drugs for som1 else sickness. Leave her n her husband alone. If u r no more interested in d marriage, fade! Amebo! Y stok ur finance's ex?
ReplyDeleteThe lesson of this story is: DO NOT add people you don't know to your Facebook.
ReplyDeleteIt's only a narcissistic with multiple personally disorder would want 600 friends on their list.
Linda Y r u nt posting my comment? Abi don offend u 4 dream?
ReplyDeleteLet sleeping dogs lie!
ReplyDeleteStill go on and marry the guy if he loves you the way you love him. And let the other family be
ReplyDeleteask him na.......
ReplyDeleteMtcheeeeeeeew go N sleep joooor.
ReplyDeleteBe deceiving yoursef u hear,who cares .Rubbish*
ReplyDeleteShut up about it, don't mess up her marriage. Marry ur faince if u want to baring in mind that the child might be His, but don't start up drama that u can't finish. She will do the right thing in time if the child is really his.
ReplyDeleteMy dear, i understand hw u feel, i was once in ur shoes too...jst tink of the future and not now... Can u stand it then...pls tak that bold step and dont risk it. U stil hav a life, dont let any man destroy it for u.
ReplyDeleteU better calm down and think straight before u do something rash!
ReplyDeleteDetective!!!
Don't give urself high bp. Ur fiancee might even know.
ReplyDeleteSo relax and try to think things through before u jump into action
The solution is to break up that relationship fast and move on.Secondly shut up your mouth because when the kasala will burst they will not put it at your backyard....leave them..The fowl yansh will soon open
ReplyDeleteYou are very stupid for sniffing arnd ur bf and his past.Now that u've found wat u are looking for,y are u confused?smh!
ReplyDeleteNa when water done pass under bridge una dey run come LIB readers....Abeg go ask your mama for this kind solution because this one done pass garri.
ReplyDeleteGhen ghen. It haff happen. Pls tell Я̲Ʊ fiance about d discovery Ooº°˚˚°ºº°˚ its better that he knows wassup nw, then U̶̲̥̅̊ both will decide d next step to take. Best of luck.
ReplyDelete*effizy*
My advice is for γφυ to put things on hold for now. Confront ur fiance on d issue and get to know his stand on it. No matter how long it takes, d truth will still come out so its better now.
ReplyDeleteMumu if you like don't relax n marry who you love,even if d child is his so? If he hdnt told you wud you be puttn 1n2 togeda? Ewu!
ReplyDeleteHian o, wahala dey. well speak to the fiance first. Communicate with him, share your thoughts and hurt with him and then take it from there.
ReplyDeleteDarlyn, talk 2ur fiance about it. Don't feel hurt, it happened before u two got together. Have them sort out whatever it is between them. Make sure you're a party to it. They sudnt settle behind ur back o b4 dey start straffing demselves again. Buh dnt u think 6mnths is a rather short time to date/court
ReplyDeleteDarlyn, talk 2ur fiance about it. Don't feel hurt, it happened before u two got together. Have them sort out whatever it is between them. Make sure you're a party to it. They sudnt settle behind ur back o b4 dey start straffing demselves again. Buh dnt u think 6mnths is a rather short time to date/court
ReplyDeleteShut up for ever
ReplyDeleteHmmmmm
ReplyDeleteAbeg leave them is not ur own business,mind ur own guy
ReplyDeleteYou are the luckiest girl alive!!! Better run away from the drama as fast as you leg can take you! and leave them to solve there wahala!!!
ReplyDeleteIn this kind of situation one would be tempted to keep shut and look away but the truth will still come out one day. You have no business confronting the woman or telling her husband. your business is with your fiance. Tell him and give him time to work things out. Whatever decision he makes would save you a lot of headache in the future whether it breaks your heart at the moment or not.
ReplyDeleteabeg go siddon sumwhere, sebi na u wan dey curios, curiosity kills d cat, u don see wetin ur eye wan see. no marry na... mcheeeew. so what if he his d father?
ReplyDeleteplease spare us the bs about curisoity - pathetic nigerian chicks who are so insecure and jealus they go through their mans toilet to look for used condoms
ReplyDeleteThat Ȋ̝̊̅§ one thing with women and their curiousity... She asked for it and now she's got it... She shuld just respect herself and keep calm, if not, she'll get something she never bargained for..
ReplyDeleteBlood of Jesus! That Babe must be heartless! Giving the baby to some1 else... I remember the story of the guy that wanted to ask his wife if one of his kids were his own...God will really help we women and infifelity..coz really Men always get away with it but we don't ........em....I fink U shud bust d news jareh!..better now than later... Let her know u know... She will deny, let him kno u kno, if he confesses and Apologizes..den carry on with ur marriage IF you can...if u can't , well linda n I still kno there's a man for evry1..don't force ur head into somthing that will ache ur heart eventually and break!
ReplyDeleteNo solution, just let sleeping dogs lie.
ReplyDeleteHewolelelelel!!!! Choi! This is an ekwensuic moment. But be still.. N shut up and marry first. Then deal with all this inhouse. Yes! I said so! Coz u were forming snoop doggy dog. Now uv snooped cocain n ur high on the info u just found. U can decide to not get married. Shit happens ehhh. @badass
ReplyDeleteWho actually cares? Abeg siddon!!! Pass the mic
ReplyDeleteOver sabi and curiosity kills the cat.
ReplyDeleteI will suggest u keep that knowledge to ursef and don't ruin another woman's marriage. The resemblance might just be in ur head and nothing else. Even if the baby is ur fiance's they are apart now, besides the lady in question did not tell him she's pregnant for him. Just my opinion. Happy marriage in advance.
ReplyDeleteYou are a nosy person. There is nothing your fiancé can tell you. IT IS OBVIOUS , you don't trust him . Do yourself and your fiancé a favor and break up the relationship
ReplyDeletelin lin e be like say u don form dis gist as usual winks* the story looks very caked..anyway only a dna can prove the true paternity,,
ReplyDeletevia my pink ipad3 latest edition
ALL YOU PEOPLE TELLING HER TO SHUT UP...ARE YOU MAD????
ReplyDeleteAHNAHN...THIS IS A MAN SHE WANTS TO SPEND THE REST OF HER LIFE WITH...NO ONE SHOULD EVER GO INTO MARRIAGE WITH QUESTIONS STILL LINGERING.
NIGERIANS CAN BE SOOO STUPID AND LIKE TO PRETEND... WTF
I BELIEVE YOU SHOULD TALK TO HIM ABOUT ...EVEN HIM HAVING SEX WITH AN ENGAGED WOMAN IN THE FIANCE'S HOUSE GOES TO SHOW THE GUY HAS A CERTIFIED COMMA.
APART FROM THAT HE THAT COVERETH EVIL WILL NOT PROSPER..AND ALSO WHAT U SOW YOU SHALL REAP...THIS RELATES IN THE SENSE THAT U SHOULD NOT KEEP QUIET ABOUT THE MATTER
AS WOMEN, WE HAVE SOMETHING CALLED INTUITION..IF YOU KNOW DEEP DOWN THAT SOMETHING IS FISHY, CONFRONT THISS YOUR COMMA FIANCE AND IF YOU TURN OUT TO BE RIGHT, PLEASE TELL ALL PARTIES INVOLVED. DO NOT COVER EVIL
FOR ALL....THE REDEEMED CHRISTIAN CHURCH OF GOD OFFERS MARRIAGE COUNSELLING (FREE OF CHARGE) FOR EXACTLY THIS REASON
THERE IS NO WAY THAT ANOYONE SHOULD GET MARRIED WITHOUT TAKING IT.
i thnk u shud tel hm. It happens, he's nt the only man on earth thou. If he denies then u brk-up cox thats cheatin
ReplyDeleteWhere is Bonario? Your Nokia 3310 don crash?
ReplyDeleteBaby u are a busy body and I advise that u mind ur business. Who do u love neither the man or ur new found friend. In life there are troubles u do not allow to shape ur life. This is one of them. Stay out of the past and face ur future.
ReplyDeleteAre you guys kidding me??? How can she keep quiet. Marriage is something you have to deal with forever, never go into it with uncertainties. Please ask your fiance, you have no business with his ex or her husband. Also, if he claims that the last time he had sex with her was a month before he met you, its probably a lie. I believe he was still sleeping with her even when he met you. For her to cheat on her fiance with your bf, she will cheat in marriage with your bf too, especially as your bf has no issues sleeping with someone elses wife. Please find out what is really going on with them. Why did they break up? Do they still have feelings for eachother? What is really going on. Please its good you found out now that you can still walk away or sort it out if you really love him. But this guy seems dodgy, please do a proper check on him before you marry him.
ReplyDeleteCommon most ppeople go on fb to do a sneak peak on their mans ex n vice versa now she's encountered something she might not be able to deal with..pls talk to him about it..let him scream/yell at for going that far but try n sort it out before u marry him..u won't want a love child knocking on ur 10yrs after marriage..that baby aspect needs to be sorted asap to remove every doubts..if the baby is his and u still love him enough to marry him then that's bless but if u can't deal with it,quietly end d relationship n move on with ur life..
ReplyDeletethis one na 'tales by moonlight' is this a new nollywood movie you are gisting us?
ReplyDeleteBaison!
Join us
ReplyDelete=)
http://africansweetheart.blogspot.co.uk/
Well since u cant let it go...my advice is,confront ur fiance about it and show him your findings.If u guys can't find a way to resolve it,I advice u walk away while u still can.
ReplyDeleteYou people are spitting rubbish. What if she goes ahead and marries this guy and in the future this revelation will lead to a bigger mess. My sister go on your knees and thank God for revealing this to you. Your Guy made a terrible mistake by sleeping with his ex when she was already engaged thats pure wickedness to his ex fiance. Please thread softly now. The deed has already been done. If I were in your shoes I will dump the guy. Because this issue is to complex to handle. So to avoid hurting myself emotionally I will leave his life for good. Forget about love and use your head
ReplyDeleteAnonymous 9:57,
ReplyDeleteThank you poo, tell them. Silly people talking nonsense. Which business is she minding? Her husband's business is her business! Talk to your fiancé. Talk to him real good so you know the best thing to do.
And for the love of God, stop snooping around. If anything concerns you, talk to your fiancé. Thats why you are in a relationship.
All of you in the story have issues sha. From the one who slept with his ex probably knowing she was engaged to the one who sleeps with another man probably while engaged and passed on the baby to another man. Haba! Down to you, miss snoop snoop.
YOU GUYS ARE SILLY......IM NOT SUPPORTING WHAT SHE DID....BUT EVER WONDER THAT THE REASON SHE ADDED D BABE ON FBOOK....IS BECAUSE HOW CAN A SOON TO BE MARRIED WOMAN BE SLEEPING WITH HER EX?........ALSO EVEN IF SHE MARRIES THE GUY ...WHATS THE GUARANTEE THAT HE WILL NOT STILL BE CHEATING WITH HIS EX????
ReplyDeleteTHE GUY DID NOT RESPECT HIS EX SOON TO BE MATRIMONIAL HOME,..WHAT MAKES YOU THINK HE WILL RESPECT HS OWN ?
hahaha Immaculate, u must be the ex!
ReplyDeletesleeping with your ex in your fiance's house...what a little whore!
these are warning signs that if u choose to ignore and marry him, u will have a miserable marriage...he clearly has no respect to go and sleep with someone else' wife to be and his ex...
ReplyDeletehe will 80% or higher chance continue this even when u marry..dont follow ure heart..the Bible says the heart is desperate nd treacherous..it will deceive u and make u think u love someone so much nd u go and give urself pain.
u will find someone worth it..drop this guy
U evil conniving bitch... It's killing u inside isn't it? Well, that's what u get for snooping around. I know ur type nah... U already knw what u r going to do but looking for how to justify ur actions. Ladun's blog comments no do u abi? U just had to come running here too. Do what u have to do & stfu already! I hope this is a lesson to people who just randomly add friends of friends on FB. Trust me....ur own will come to u too. Gerrout jor
ReplyDeleteCuriosity killED the friggin' cat! Arrrggghhh!!! Gosh! And pls I'm not trying to justify rubbish but the ex girlfriend is not any more whorish than u Nigerian men dat will sleep with anything that breathes and moves! Some of u on ur wedding nite sef.... So enuf of all this 'Nigerian Women are horrible' crap.... Mscheeeeew......
ReplyDeleteDont worry his ex. Leaver her alone. Ask your finace if he wants to do anything about it and let him work it out with his ex. The key here is knowing if you want that child as an additional party in your marriage. Dont forget with the extra child, you inherit the mother as well. Oh well. Not too easy a situation to be in. I personally believe all kids should be connected to their fathers.
ReplyDeleteAll of you girls telling her to 'shut up, mind her business and just marry' show the marriage-by-force mentally which is pitiful!
ReplyDeleteHow can you ignore the shameful fact that her bf slept with his ex in her fiance's house few months before his ex's marriage - What does that say about his character?
My dear, make sure you consider all the factors carefully. You cannot go into marriage with such potentially damaging doubts. Get the facts straight and decide what to do from there.
You are still young and have your whole life ahead of you. Walk away if you have to. You will be grateful you did in the long run.
Your an Idiot...U wanted an answer out of curiosity and found it....Then u want us to advice u..lol Don't u think that u are smarter than us?
ReplyDeleteI had a simillar xperience, saw d baby on facebook, i was curious bcos she told me she was pregnant for me which she later denied and few months later she got married. The baby looks so much like me. We did a DNA test and guess what? the baby isnt mine. So dont be too sure.
ReplyDeleteYou brought all this on yourself.. Lemme analyse ur case for u
ReplyDelete1. Your fiance in confidence,told u about what he did before he. Got married to u,and all u can do is bring it to blogs,tarnishing his image and killing his pride.. How would u expect him to tell u sumfin again? With only this sweetie,u not ready to be a wife
2. He slept with this girl in juneand met u in july. How is that your problem? The deed happened before he met u,before he even proposed to u. Why did u now think it was neccessary for u to stalk the Ex who's olwedi in her home?
3. U ve been stalking every pictures she displays on Fb,to even know that the woman puts up her baby's pix every month.. Now ur eyes are playing tricks of u cos u olwedi have the image of ur fiance and his ex together in your head,now making u fink the baby is for u Ex
4. U want to go and tell his Ex that u know the baby is not for her hubby,how is that ur business? What if u go and tell her that and paternity test comes out and the baby is for the hubby? What will u now do? By then,u must have spoiled ur marriage plans cos ur fiance wouldn't marry u again knowing u did all that because he told u the truth. And if the partenity test proves that the baby is for fiance,what next? The Ex's hubby will either chase her out of there home or accept the child as his,so if he chases her,ur fiance would have to take her in and since u are not married yet,they will throw u to the corner
5. U want to confront ur fiance for what? If he didn't tell u,would u have been snooping around? So what next when u confront him? He either finds out he has a baby he doesn't know exist or knows exist.. If he didn't know,he would go and either meet the Ex or not meet her. If he meets her,he would ask for his baby or not ask for it.. If he asked for the baby,then the Ex hubby will find out what happened and u would be the cause of a broken home,mind u,after all this,he will call of the engagement with u cos u violated his trust by going to play detective.
My advise to u is this,I don't think u are ready to marry.. So tell him u fink u guys rushed up the whole thing and u'd like a break cos u are becoming so nervouse and all.. Just leave him because u don't trust him,u can't keep his secret,u nt reading to be a step mom and u still checking up on things he does.. Marriage isn't a bed of roses.. But if u fink ur love can cover up all this,then get married to him and bury everything like it never happened,then go down on ur knees to pray
@ Mrs. Jacqueline Okafor November 18, 2012 2:40 PM
ReplyDeleteYou are very much on point. I hope she reads it. everything you said are words from my mouth. She is sure not ready for marriage and she may end up waiting eternally (not praying for it to happen) and if she ends up marrying the guy she may leave with high BP for the rest of her life bc of her own undoing....For others, sneifing around for what doesnt concern you is not the best. I have always heard of this addage - what you dont know wouldnt hurt you - If she did not snief around like snoop dog would she have ended up living in hurt? the woman involved is happy in her home and she is here dieying with worries. I wish her the best.
Are you guys kidding me???TF?She should face her business and go into a marriage based on deceit???
ReplyDeleteHian!Na wah...na real wah!God save someborri oh.My dear...what will be will be.I say ask him.You're a woman...find a way to coin your story,but ask him you must.When you do find out the truth,whatever you decide to do from then on,at least you have your peace.Nobody should start the rest of their lives under false premises..this isn't a case of letting sleeping dogs lie.This dog is not sleeping ooh!All the best darling,God be with you.
My dear, is it a crime for your bf to tell you the truth about his past, or were you the one that called him before he opened up??, i am very sure that the guy really love you, that is while he can take pains to tell you the truth about his past, it is left for you if you trust him or not, good luck.
ReplyDeleteSHE IS JOBLESS...
ReplyDeletePls my dear dont you think that if you let your bf knows about your finding,you want to start what you can not finish because your fb mind will always be with the child especially if you did not conceive on time after your wedding pls be wise.moreso,you can not be to sure that the baby is for bf.you can talk with your bf but with wisdom,once again be wise.
ReplyDeleteNo Pix, No Storyyyyy
ReplyDeleteMy dear, one woman to the other, back off, back off, back off. You think you want to know? Trust me, you don't!
ReplyDeleteSomethings are better left unseen, unknown,untampered. U went 2far!!! 4rm ur post, U wldnt be satisfied until u find out d truth. So confront ur man about it.Be wise...u can say it jokingly. Lili plz post my comment. Joy
ReplyDeleteI think there are several things going on here.
ReplyDelete1. You watch way too many Nollywood movies and this has left you paranoid beyond belief. Your mind always needs a mystery to discover because that is what life is all about to your strange brand of individual. Your fiance robbed you of one mystery by confessing and now your mind has started painting a whole new mystery to fill the void left by the confession. btw an orange looks like an apple if a paranoid person stares at it long enough.
2. You are having second thoughts about your engagement and probably have feelings for someone else. unfortunately you have a strong conscience that won't let you walk away from someone you promised to spend the rest of your life with...unless of course you can paint him as a scum-bag, and even get support from hundreds of strangers from maybe...a blog...just to satisfy your conscience. there's an old saying "Give a dog a bad name...then shoot it."
of course i could be wrong *shrug*
This your guy is not worth it and irresponsible, just like his Ex, i truly appreciate your Bold step to get Facts, at least thats the man you wish you Marry and you need to know everything possible about him. What i'll advice is Dont tell the Ex husband, he for one, if not foolish should know the kind of woman he got married to, so thats his own Palaver. God is not Partial, he works people for each other, he might have Scammed so many girls and this is his own reward- to train someone else's Child.
ReplyDeleteAs for that your Husband, he might claim the child later in the future and that may cause trouble for you and your Unborn children 2 the man is just a Cheat and i dont think you can cope with such person, sleeping with a married woman, what more cant he do when he eventually marries you.
Think Deep
my dear, block her from ur facebook.2. tell ur bf what u noticed bcos i knw u cants keep it to urself alone. 3. if he has been truthful and worthy in d relationship ols go ahead and marry. 4 and stop poknosing so u dont hurt urseif. good luck.
ReplyDeleteThe fact is that this issue is becoming rampant in Nigeria. My cousin's son was denied visa because the DNA Test (2 Checks) showed the boy wasn't his. Luckily the last two girls were his. It appears the boy was a carry over from a fling before or in the early days of marriage.
ReplyDeleteAproko girl, who send u message. be der and be nosy, ur only destroying urslf.besides u shud be happy his ex is married. keep investigating! u go old.
ReplyDeleteTo the girl suggesting the abortion......are you okay? An abortion is not something to be taken lightly. You just don't kill a baby because it is not convinient.
ReplyDeleteAmebo,, stop pitying the woman's husband ooo, what if he is impotent n is aware of d baby? Perhaps psychologically u are seeing ur bfs face on her son cos u already ideas in yur head,,,it's not a problem so no solution fr u,,, busy body,,added her on fb just to spy,,,
ReplyDelete@immaculate you are on point,,,,, tell the mum woman
ReplyDeleteMy dear, wat u dnt knw doesnt kill u, if u ask me, its rily not ur biz stalking the poor lady, u fink u re half hurt as her if truly d baby's not her husband's? jst be truthful to urself, if u can live with this jst go ahead wit ur marriage and dnt kill yasef b4 death comes; bur i rily fink u shld av dis discussion wit ur hubby, but dnt EVER attempt to contact that poor lady, if she can live with d fact that she has a bastard child for her husband(PROBABLY) jst let it be dat way, and if she cant, let her come forward herslf wen d time is right.... And if that time comes be READY and dats more reason y u must discuss wit ur fiance... I rest my case
ReplyDeleteMy dear, wat u dnt knw doesnt kill u, if u ask me, its rily not ur biz stalking the poor lady, u fink u re half hurt as her if truly d baby's not her husband's? jst be truthful to urself, if u can live with this jst go ahead wit ur marriage and dnt kill yasef b4 death comes; bur i rily fink u shld av dis discussion wit ur hubby, but dnt EVER attempt to contact that poor lady, if she can live with d fact that she has a bastard child for her husband(PROBABLY) jst let it be dat way, and if she cant, let her come forward herslf wen d time is right.... And if that time comes be READY and dats more reason y u must discuss wit ur fiance... I rest my case
ReplyDeleteMrs Jacqueline Okafor you said it all.
ReplyDeleteSomeone asked for advise and all she got was INSULTS!
ReplyDeleteLIB readers learn to be courteous!
I really don't blame you guys, but the people that come to THIS forum to seek for advise!
My opinion:
You should marry him since you love him too much. No man is flawless. What is the probability of the next guy you meet, don't have a skeleton in his cupboard?
Please let sleeping dogs lie.
Publish it if you like Linda!
my dear, if u love him continue with ur wedding plan, since the girl in question is married.
ReplyDeleteNo man is spotless and non is whiter than snow. so take heart accept him, don't ve problems with him. just let the sleeping dog lie.
ReplyDeletejust forgive and go ahead with your wedding plans.
ReplyDelete