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Saturday, 12 September 2015

Pastor Anita Oyakhilome writes about abusive relationships and marriages

In a post on her blog titled 'There is always something to be thankful for', pastor Anita Oyakhilome, who filed for divorce from the founder of Christ Embassy, Chris Oyakhilome, on April 9, 2014 on the grounds of “unreasonable behaviour” talks about abusive relationships and marriages.

She began with a quote from American actor, Michael J. Fox "One's dignity may be assaulted, vandalized and cruelly mocked, but it can never be taken away unless it is surrendered.". See what she wrote after the cut...

She wrote:
After an abusive relationship or marriage, there is no doubt you will have feelings of deep sorrow for a long time, which could go on for possibly months or even years. These feelings will come and go periodically as you reflect and you remember things from the past that would make you feel distressed.
You may be inundated with disappointments, which may lead you to voice your regrets, especially coming across certain people or a person. Several Instances could cause flashbacks and bring back thoughts of regret such as; signing a contract, making a decision, joining an organization, trusting people, buying a property. Also your mind would question why you hung unto a dead marriage or stayed in an abusive relationship. Don't stay in that condition for too long.
Regrets will only aggravate your feelings. Forget about the things you cannot change and focus on being thankful. Don’t put your life on hold, rather plan what you would like to accomplish in one week, one month, three months and in a year’s time.
See the silver lining in the cloud. You may struggle to find or observe that flicker of light emerging out of the darkness but give yourself time to recover from that shocking hopeless experience, then thank God for making you strong enough to walk away from the abuse.
The situation might be tough, with burdensome chains, but you will get better. You can rise up to the challenge and improve yourself. Something good will come out of your situation. You will become a stronger and more productive person when you learn from your experience and use your knowledge to improve yourself for new prospects ahead. "I want my life to bring comfort to others and I am on that journey now thankfully." Every ending is really a new beginning for beautiful opportunities ahead.

101 comments:

  1. a.k.a EDWIN CHINEDU AZUBUKO said...
    .
    She is beautifull though no doubt.....
    .
    .
    ***CURRENTLY IN JUPITER***

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  2. I love this "one's dignity may be assaulted, vandalised αи∂ mocked cruelly, but can never be taken away unless surrendered"

    Well they (she αи∂ pastor chris) knows what went wrong...αи∂ I love d move she took, some hopless ladies will stay in an unhealthy marriage αи∂ decieve themselves with praying for it to work when its obvious to them it wouldn't. There are times one need to put aside religion αи∂ do †ђξ very right thing. Don't get me wrong, prayer worketh all things, most things but praying without acting isn't cool. U pray, u act....
    Him who God fends for, shld also be fendn for himself. Having common sense is very vital.
    Anita moved on αи∂ she's fine....








    #it WiLL oNly gEt BeTTer
    #IT mUsT eND iN pRAiSE

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    Replies
    1. Look well try nd stayed married.God doesn't like divorce ur ideologies can't change dat no matter how much we try

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  3. I love this "one's dignity may be assaulted, vandalised αи∂ mocked cruelly, but can never be taken away unless surrendered"

    Well they (she αи∂ pastor chris) knows what went wrong...αи∂ I love d move she took, some hopless ladies will stay in an unhealthy marriage αи∂ decieve themselves with praying for it to work when its obvious to them it wouldn't. There are times one need to put aside religion αи∂ do †ђξ very right thing. Don't get me wrong, prayer worketh all things, most things but praying without acting isn't cool. U pray, u act....
    Him who God fends for, shld also be fendn for himself. Having common sense is very vital.
    Anita moved on αи∂ she's fine....








    #it WiLL oNly gEt BeTTer
    #IT mUsT eND iN pRAiSE

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    Replies
    1. I disagree with u cos thr's nothing without solution, divorce isn't the best way to go..They were an eyes of God on earth here n u need to see the results of this breakup to somepeople.sometimes patients drives all wrongs rights.

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    2. I wonder, in all her she said there is no reference to the Word of God she once profess to identified with.She rather talked of dignity,dignity without Christ the saviour, well on that Day we shall see, surprise, surprise, , ,

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    3. Rights and dignity that negates the sanctity and eternal Word of God!

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  4. adam pls shut up....we don't need shiii from a divorcee of a wife......or from a Christ embassy member, shove ur advict in or ass, even dou u made sense

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    Replies
    1. Do you bother to read what u type before hitting the publish button?
      Leave LIB and read your books child

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  5. adam pls shut up....we don't need shiii from a divorcee of a wife......or from a Christ embassy member, shove ur advict in or ass, even dou u made sense

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  6. adam pls shut up....we don't need shiii from a divorcee of a wife......or from a Christ embassy member, shove ur advict in or ass, even dou u made sense

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  7. adam pls shut up....we don't need shiii from a divorcee of a wife......or from a Christ embassy member, shove ur advict in or ass, even dou u made sense

    ReplyDelete
  8. adam pls shut up....we don't need shiii from a divorcee of a wife......or from a Christ embassy member, shove ur advict in or ass, even dou u made sense

    ReplyDelete
  9. adam pls shut up....we don't need shiii from a divorcee of a wife......or from a Christ embassy member, shove ur advict in or ass, even dou u made sense

    ReplyDelete
  10. adam pls shut up....we don't need shiii from a divorcee of a wife......or from a Christ embassy member, shove ur advict in or ass, even dou u made sense

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  11. adam pls shut up....we don't need shiii from a divorcee of a wife......or from a Christ embassy member, shove ur advict in or ass, even dou u made sense

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  12. Make no mistakes about this Linda....this account in Rev Anita's name is not real...it is deception...I know what I am saying...if you doubt M̶̲̥̅̊ε̲̣̣̣̥,you can do some more findings

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    Replies
    1. pastoranita.org is her personal website. She announced it at an event in may (d event dt was shown here as pastor anita at her mums birthday - even though it wasnt her mum) and d website was widely publicized on all d blogs. Except LIB who is publishing it 5months after. Lol.

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  13. Pastor Chris Trained you well...now he can pay for it. One of the worst feelings is to have a woman who once loved you...move on without a blink. Hit me up lets talk relationship 2C0FE109

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  14. for this weman to end this marriage ,there most be something we still don't know.

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  15. Pride won't let Pastor Chris call you back...your ego wont even let you go back. This marriage must have been long broken. Ya'll don't need to bother us with pity articles...

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    Replies
    1. U hit d nail right...
      PRIDE, the hydra-headed monster...

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  16. She's definitely pouring it out and y'all heartbroken shuld pay attention cos u probably gonna need some of it sooner dan later....

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    Replies
    1. I thought it was for better for worse!!

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  17. Issokay seen, thanks for sharing. Linda take note!

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  18. Issokay seen, thanks for sharing. Linda take note!

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  19. Issokay seen, thanks for sharing. Linda take note!

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  20. Take heart.
    ~D great anonymous!

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  21. This has bn posted on other blogs AGES ago. Did u just find out?????

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  22. tot they were back together

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  23. I know Pst Anita so well, she is a wonderful person. It's however a concern when a minister of God does a write-up and the only quote being mentioned is not from the bible but Mr Fox.

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  24. Spoken with wisdom

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  25. but GOD hates divorce Maám! http://www.bummyla.com

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  26. I know Pst Anita so well, she is a wonderful person. It's however a concern when a minister of God does a write-up and the only quote being mentioned is not from the bible but Mr Fox.

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  27. There is a possibility pastor chris abused her.
    #lipssealed

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  28. Linda thanks for ds post nd Pastor Mrs Anita I really ap8 ds write up

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  29. this is shameful, coming from an induvudual that's supposed to be a role model in the body of Christ. Madam.. there's no how you try to frame this or exonerate yourself.. "God hates divorce"..
    Where is your testimony in Christ?? what do u preach??

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  30. Does this mean that they are no more?

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  31. She sounds liberated. The worst thing that can happen to anyone is to be in an unhappy marriage.

    Matters Of The Heart - click my name to read more

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  32. RUBBISH! RUBBISH! RUBBISH!
    SHE IS IN PAINS, JUST PRETENDING TO SEE MAYBE SHE WILL LURE SOME GULLIBLE AWAY.
    DO NOT LISTEN TO ALL THOSE MEANINGLESS TALK.

    ONE MAXIN STILL STAND TALL IN EVERY LIFE OF A WOMAN, "NO MATTER THE HUGE AMOUNT OF MONEY A LADY MAY HAVE, SHE IS STILL IN THAT "PAINS" WHEN NO MAN HOLDS ON TO HER LOVE"

    SO SAYS

    @@GREAT_IGBERE_EBIRI

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    Replies
    1. What can a man who doesn't know love do for a woman...

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  33. Kudos to her for encouraging others!

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  34. Very Encouraging words am also in an abusive relationship becs of my son I praying God leads me to a better place soon

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  35. She's beginning t look like her husband

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  36. I thank God she finally came out of that cult-like hold. Anyone who knew Anita will know that she was and is a very sweet, unassuming woman and that is the reason her ex husband could intimate, manipulate and dominate her the ways he did. And not only that he made others disrespect her. I hope he repents

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    1. Where did you get information o!...Assumption is the mother of all fuckups...All those of you who are now sacrosanct judges and Executioner, encouraging divorce, are you angels without errors?...All those women liberationists, I greet u...Because you have lived riotous lives or have chosen the wrong husbands from greediness and the likes, u are now happy that a pastor's marriage has failed...Your judgement wont slip by.

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    2. "He that watereth shall be watered, and liberal soul shall be made fat"
      I praise God for his son Pastor Chris! His care-giving Ministry is a great access to the kingdom of our Lord Jesus Christ. I'm not a member of Christ Embassy, actually I have been following the tenets of their fellowship of which is in Christ's Order (Holy Ghost inspired) therein nothing that justifies anita's claim in any ramifications.
      Jesus Christ Himself by the Power of Holy Ghost has set up that Church, commonly called Christ Embassy under the leadership of his anointed one Chris Oyakhilome.
      Every other persons, Chris's Parents, siblings, relatives , so including Anita and her children are followers, however Anita didn't care to know why it is so.
      Anita is absolutely clueless, carnal and ingrate. Anita has been under cover and endurance of her amiable husband. To put this account properly, Anita failed to realize that the very first time after her wedding, that she had sex with a virgin, Anita knew that Chris was a virgin, and her being not a virgin before her wedding should have some reservations while posting "holier than thou" attitude.
      Now the same man you called your husband whom you married being virgin has turned be an adultery described in varying degrees. Initially you started by abusing every one in your husband's family including your husband's parents and siblings. Chris your lovely husband were all the time defending your mischievous acts because he believed in the word of God and does it.
      Anita, have you not carried over the same anger, bitterness and jealousy against your husband's family to the entire Church members more especially women and for this single reason you sent to UK branch. It is to stem down your restiveness and false accusations against innocent people which has been your stock-in- trade. Anita felt exposed since her master is no longer there to continue covering her mess up. No body has ever brought out issues like this and then the mundane among your committee of witches and wizards had your evil battle cry against your husband and church under his leadership. Thank God Almighty that you're the that went to court. No one any where even your husband's family could stand with you, oh my goodness, what a terrible being were you Anita? Where, who are you leaving your young children for Anita? If you fill sex starved and want to out like prince Diana, I bet you, your reward will be dangerous than Diana's. Those that are waiting to remarry may or may not know the consequences collecting the wife of anointed of God.
      All you praising her please ride on OK.

      Delete
  37. God can never be cheated...
    Imagine us not wanting to change and conform to God's Ways yet want to ne happy, how? Men of God doing show outside yet full of pride and arrogance at home.
    Question: Why can't MOG be like Paul Adefarasin and Ben Carson...
    Really...no one can cheat God.

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  38. Liars.The essence of life is to overcome struggle,irrespective of where it came from.This people should just leave us alone with their sermon .

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  39. Not even a single biblical quotation. Ok o

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    Replies
    1. At least you now know she is not a bible person

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  40. Pastor Ma,I miss u

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  41. Okay, nice one. Experience is always the best teacher.












    #TeamBlessed#

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  42. God is a Good God, I thank God for unity and love strong cord, God is able to keep and preserve in understanding and submission. love you Pastor Anita.

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  43. Thanks Anita! You don,t know how much I needed that. Walked out of an abusive relationship and have been depressed.

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  44. Just don't know what to say: but how can your life inspire or bring comfort to me when as a pastor you are divorced... Maybe I'm just being unreasonable,anyways,great words....

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    Replies
    1. Yes! U are being not just unreasonable but myopic and senseless. There is nowhere it is written that because you are a pastor, you should let one useless man drive u to suicide. My dear abuse in relationship leads to depression and depression kills faster than Hiv/Aids cos it can lead to ending one's life. Whether u are inspired or not? She has made her decision and have chosen to LIVE

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    2. Only God is wise. Sometimes He only needs you to understand the Message and not the Messanger.

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  45. She is talking Frm experience.

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  46. Wow beautiful words of wisdom from a woman who's been through it all,kudos to you Pastor Anita

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  47. Arab call This kind of talk.."kallam zaki" vain talk

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    Replies
    1. Find me job for middle east na?

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  48. And linda have the balls to show my comment. Thanks

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  49. This write up isn't from Pastor Anita... Linda do ur findings very well!

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  50. Because you are a divorcee does not mean that you have to encourage it.If you were still married to your husband,I don't think you will write this on your blog.You are an impatient wife and should hide your face away from the public.Don't advice our wives please because a woman who cant stay in marriage knows nothing about been married so should not talk about marriage.Marriage is about Understanding,Tolerance,Love etc

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    1. Why are you so so stupid

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    2. Wow judge. You can still hold on or endure is not by your power but by God's grace. Judge not.........

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  51. Lemme ask you all a question..do we need to hold on to something till it eventually takes our lives? Pastors are humans too, please take note...

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  52. Dint bother reading it sha, but sure wish u the best of luck pretty woman

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  53. I believe Pastor Anita was in an abusive and difficult marriage, any ways she might see it. But going about it the way she did is absolutely un-christianly and to me, should renounce that pastor- ship she was called to. She does not know how many thousands of Christians worldwide she would make to stumble in their Christian journey by the actions she took. She now makes it a cool thing to divorce without exploring all avenues for Reconciliation.Just My two cents

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    1. True talk my dear. Being a divorce pastor is not Christian like. I don't knw what will take me to a church where d pastor is a divorcee.

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    2. Na enjoyment u dey go look for be dat.

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  54. dont be fooled people , there is every possibility this is not rev anita, moreova always watch wat you say as regards anointed men of God aswell as relationships ....what you dont kw, you dont know...

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  55. God thank you for Pastor Chris and his wife. Please have mercy on Pastor Anita if she wrote this and on me for reading this. Amen.

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  56. Every marriage problem can be worked out. Marriage has never being an even or easy playing ground. Abusive relationship indeed. I have fucked my wife's best friend who was also married, what can be more abusive than that? .My wife is a looker and a brainard,I had dated girls outside my marriage, brought chlamydia home from all these UK, Nigerian girls, I have beat my wife black and blue. She loved me through and through. Till date, I cant place why she stayed with me. Even after all our children she is still a looker. Any other man would have desired her. SHE STAYED. I lost my fortune she stayed. So why would Pst. Anita talk like western woman trained in the ways of the world. God does not take kindly with a man mistreating a woman, not to talk of a pastor. If he does God would have dealt with him. For Pst. Anita to be misguiding married women (if she actually said this) is an indication that she was never in tune with the word of God...Now I am back...My wife is all I have got...I sing her praise at every chance she has to give me attention.

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    Replies
    1. When next you think that washing your dirty linen in public is enough justification for your animalistic behaviour towards your wife, just remember that not every woman is as hopeless as your woman who actually lack self worth. Not that she loved you that much to die for you.

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  57. EWU anonymous 11.33pm, you open your dirty rotten mouth to confess all the physical and emotional abuse you did to your wife plus bring home STD and are proud that she still stayed with you after sleeping with her best friend.
    You claim to have given her the worst abuse and that now you have retired and come home to her ,she is now all you have. Nonsense !!
    It is Nigerian men like you who are possesed with such useless entitlement that should be shown the most pepper by these new age small girls wen don tear eye !
    You really think Pastor Anita is as dumb as your senseless wife to stay in a worthless relationship like yours?
    Maybe your wife should subscribe to Pastor Anita's blog and learn a thing or 2 about growing some balls to leave your worthless ass !
    Dundie ! Ewu ! Rabid DOG !!
    Sing her paises kor- sing her praises ni !
    My friend shut ya cheating abusive pie hole !
    Msheeewww!!

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    Replies
    1. No need to join issues with you...Since you have just shown here that you are like my wife's erstwhile best friend...Keep deluding urself...One thing is certain u are a divorcee...Looking for small boys...Amerikana or Britico...Your women's lib ass would take you nowhere...Frustration would kill you after all those boys ur grandsons age are done climbing you...The Dildo and sex toys companies would sell through you...Congratulations glorified Okpombo (Ask a Warri chap what this means).

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    2. After recieving those hot lashes, let me now teach you in few words, marriage...The couples that are meant together successful are the ones who go through tough and terrible things that would tear them apart but come out stronger than they started...You probably dumped several guys and even married the wrong guy and now u r divorced. Stop being bitter, and go and beg so those young men stop riding you. QED.

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    3. Tell all the Monsters who think that women are meant for some emotional experiment to shut their dirty mouth. so it pains them that women are getting wise up?

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  58. Father Lord help me to bridle my tongue,heal broken homes and let your peace reign our homes for I ask in Jesus name. Amen

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Disclaimer: Opinions expressed in comments are those of the comment writers alone and does not reflect or represent the views of Linda Ikeji.

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