Dear LIB readers: My man says he'll only marry me if I agree to stop wearing weaves
From a female LIB reader
After eleven months together, my boyfriend told me recently that the only reason he hasn't proposed to me is because of my weaves, that he couldn't spend the rest of his life with a woman who wears wigs and weaves. He says he wants his wife to only carry her natural hair and nothing else, so this is a deal breaker for us. He says once I make him that promise he will propose to me and I can start making wedding plans.
I'm worried for two reasons; I love my weaves and I don't know if I can exist without them and 2, a man who is adamant on having his way and doesn't want to listen to reason or even compromise may be a huge problem later in the marriage. But I love him and want to marry him, I just don't know what to do about his ultimatum. Please help!
i think Linda is in the best position to tell you if she can love any man more than her weaves, lmaoooo, I doubt it. my dear, i don't know how that concerns us, you have already said u will marry him, weaves or not.
Hahahahahahhahaha..........anty linda dis is realy funny,weave?? She dosnt hv a case,......if she realy love d guy,she will not tink it twice b4 taking it off,she is even lucky dt d guy open up to her,...........she is not getting any younger_aliyuboniface@gmail.com
Hahahahahahhahaha..........anty linda dis is realy funny,weave?? She dosnt hv a case,......if she realy love d guy,she will not tink it twice b4 taking it off,she is even lucky dt d guy open up to her,...........she is not getting any younger_aliyuboniface@gmail.com
Hahahahahahhahaha..........anty linda dis is realy funny,weave?? She dosnt hv a case,......if she realy love d guy,she will not tink it twice b4 taking it off,she is even lucky dt d guy open up to her,...........she is not getting any younger_aliyuboniface@gmail.com
Hahahahahahhahaha..........anty linda dis is realy funny,weave?? She dosnt hv a case,......if she realy love d guy,she will not tink it twice b4 taking it off,she is even lucky dt d guy open up to her,...........she is not getting any younger_aliyuboniface@gmail.com
Hahahahahahhahaha..........anty linda dis is realy funny,weave?? She dosnt hv a case,......if she realy love d guy,she will not tink it twice b4 taking it off,she is even lucky dt d guy open up to her,...........she is not getting any younger_aliyuboniface@gmail.com
Lmao....d guy dey secure he and he children future nah....he no wan dey buy Japanese Malaysia and American hair up and down. ..prolly ure a weave freak dts y...so my dear learn how to start making Ghana weavings and dem braids
Remove ur weave and marry him, moreso u can be braiding ur hair with either wool or attachment, it make u look younger and naturally beautiful, weave mak one look older
Na which kain useless condition be dat?dats how u girls 'll goan enter hell say na marriage. Did he not see girls with natural hair?why is he not dating them?becos dere's something unique about you bah? I pity u. You beta run for ur life. Love aint enof to get married.
Hmmm... if this is not for religious reasons, then this man would not respect your opinions and freedom of expression after marriage. I hope u can cope with that!
Are your wigs going to follow u to d grave? There are so many things u can so with your natural hair even finer than the wigs u wear, my sister u had better do what he wants since u said u love n want to marry him before one sister with natural hair hijacks him My two cents
The both of you should compromise, for me am sure you can do without your weaves, if you believe in prayers them you can take the matter to God in prayers. Nothing is too small to pray about. Ayatonito.
I wonda wats wrong wif wearn weaves as long as u keep ur hair neat n healthy..... Buh seriously dis guy is d type dah keeps asking yu to giv up tins yu luv. He's a wacko sewiously....
# Laughsohard.. now he wants you to drop Ur weaves before he can purpose but he has been dating u with them on, just be careful, once u yield to one Ur gonna yield to all, you'll probably have to drop Ur life on one occasion marriage ain't everything. don't make it seem Ur desperate.. chill.. focus on making urself, the right man will come.he ain't gonna demand u changing he's simply gonna love Ur imperfections,#perfectly.#
# Laughsohard.. now he wants you to drop Ur weaves before he can purpose but he has been dating u with them on, just be careful, once u yield to one Ur gonna yield to all, you'll probably have to drop Ur life on one occasion marriage ain't everything. don't make it seem Ur desperate.. chill.. focus on making urself, the right man will come.he ain't gonna demand u changing he's simply gonna love Ur imperfections,#perfectly.#
Mtcheeeew!what a way to start my day.as for me y am not married yet is because am still amending some necessary things in my relationship.yes I know I can't change a man but things like this matter if it were me I will try to change it but if I can't i will let the man go.the problems we ladies have is that we get so scared that if this man goes,no other will come,then we start calculating age and so on.bcos of these filmsy excuses ladies are married like they are sold.when u get home u won't av a single say at home as if u are a slave.let a woman try to get at least 80% comfort u were receiving while in our family's home biko
Mtcheeeew!what a way to start my day.as for me y am not married yet is because am still amending some necessary things in my relationship.yes I know I can't change a man but things like this matter if it were me I will try to change it but if I can't i will let the man go.the problems we ladies have is that we get so scared that if this man goes,no other will come,then we start calculating age and so on.bcos of these filmsy excuses ladies are married like they are sold.when u get home u won't av a single say at home as if u are a slave.let a woman try to get at least 80% comfort u were receiving while in our family's home biko
You guys should talk tins out and come to a compromise. if he refuses and u insist on keeping ur wig, then quite d relationship. helenmissy27@gmail.com
It is not about the weaves honey! There is a more fundamental issue here.I know men like this.He is a control freak.He will keep you at home when he marries you.you will end up jobless and unattractive. While he will be out there dating girls with weaves. If he feels so strongly about it , while did he get involve with you to start with? There are a lot of girls without weaves, why not date those girls?
Dats what he wants if u can abide by it den marry him... I told my wife same things but I didn't make it a bait...she willingly start planting her natural hair and I love it so much.. If you love him OBEY
Hehehehe sounds funny tho. Who knows what next he might ask of you,but you never complained of his love for you. If you feel he's the right person for you asides the wig and weaves,do away with them and keep your man.
Wats does oga ve with wigs and weaves??? My dear u knw wat u want,listen to ur hrt,b4 oga will tell u one day dat u stop having frnds,wearing trousers etc
You love and want to marry him. Don't come here tomorrow to whine about how hard and authoritative he is o. He saw you with wig and weaves and still dated you and now he is giving you condition for marriage,didn't he see it before? My friend if you love weaves and will not be happy loosing it pls forget the primitive man. Has it occured to you that if you agree to this,you will waer natural hair on ur wedding day? If you no get front hair like me wetin u go do na? Look well before you leap o. Who is urs will accept you with all ur warts.
We are always d cause of Our own plans, wt kind of an excuse is ur man givin u. An abusive relationship is not only dt which d man beats his woman, dis rite here is an abusive relationship n like I would always say never go stay cos u feel u can manage it's a lifetime journey.
ma dear its not only the weave he is worried about, but other artificial things u myt possess so my advice. consider stopping the use of other artificials too. it will turn problem later o
Sweetheart, if he can't love and accept you with your weaves, then i don't think he is for you.. of all the important thngs a man should look out for in a woman, i think weaves shouldnt even be on that list.. Don't get tiedup in smthn u might regret later.. Also pray up!...Kiraa.
You are in the best position to solve ur issues, can u stop wearing d weaves?, wat if u stop and he wants to change something about u again, so just think about it and see if u can live with a man dat might decide to change u totally into wat he wants and not who u are
A man that really loves should not put an ultimatum for marriage. It should be a matter of understanding and compromise. Black women wear weaves mostly because our natural hair is hard to manage. The weaves are easier to manage. You can really talk to him and explain and reach a compromise. A man who is insensitive to your feelings and opinion will also prove to be that way in other issues. I hope you guys work this out
There are other things he'd stop you from doing when you finally get in and you'd find it ridiculous. Run now before it get's late. There's a thin line between love and hate.
Abeg don't listen to him if u marry him ur marriage will be based on command. If he wants to propose he will propose without looking at the weaves. U love him yes but learn to stand on ur feet.
You sure know what to do. Stop wearing waves and get married. Vote Linda Ikeji as the Most Active Blogger of the year. www.socialmediameritawards.com/vote.php
This doesn't make any sense to me.... has weave killed anyone he knws?. na wa oh. But are you allowed to braid? Ask him. Yeah men like this might end up enslaving u wen u'r married.after marriage d next thing he'ld say is don't keep frnds, or don't invite family members or even stop working. My dear you have to sit him down and talk to him before its too late. He shld be able to meet you half way if he truly loves you. Pray and be wise!
Ha..in this Morden world..I inw fit shout..is it against his religion or wht? Why ask u out in d 1st place whn he saw weaves on u tht day..its complicated ooO..if not wig or weaves wht den? ★ain't gonna agree on tht bullshit
Ed Dreams and Aliyu Boniface are such nonentities, foolish beings and cash hunters!! Stop commenting 25times on a single piece of news... are u born retards or just daft from ur mommas womb? Its wednesday already! If you avnt been notified that u won already then it means u havent qualified! which i strongly doubt u would ever be btw! Awon ode meji!
Ma, you need to take time to think it through. Much as a man can tell what he likes, if he hangs his marring you on weaves it means that his priorities may be a little bit questionable. That's because when you love some one, you need to accept the person for whom they are and if that person loves you back, they will change to please you. Think twice before you commit to this man because he will surely be a controlling husband.
Ed Dreams and Aliyu Boniface are such nonentities, foolish beings and cash hunters!! Stop commenting 25times on a single piece of news... are u born retards or just daft from ur mommas womb? Its wednesday already! If you avnt been notified that u won already then it means u havent qualified! which i strongly doubt u would ever be btw! Awon ode meji!
He has told u his mind and wat he wants. If u indeed love him, u'd do as he says. And if u can't do dat, I guess u start looking elsewr for anoda man who is ready to live wit a woman wit weaves and wigs
Na original gbege be dat ooo. D guy is just too stingy, he knows how costly weaves n wigs are so he is trying to avoid d expenses. I will advise u to reduce how u wear weaves n go natural but if he insist dat u shld not wear it @all Dats bad. D decision is urs but I believe if he truly loves u, he won't be adamant. Wise up girl marrying dat type of guy won't be easy
Ogbeni, go throwey that stupid weaves or get married to it! Maybe your natural hair is what turns him on or hes just noticed your weaves are not impressing , out of dates or you look terrible wearing them! Simply ask him the reason ....NEXXXXXT !
You are talking about forever and a day with him,please don't make a promise you can't keep.if you promise not to go on weave only God knows the next thing he will tell u to stop doing
I onced dated a girl that was addicted to hair extensions, wigs etc. We quarrelled frequently about it. She even skipped church and classes when she's on her natural hair; I used to always ask her, have u lost ur self confidence? Poster, while I try to see reasons with why he shouldn't be so rigid over an issue as flippant as this, I will also join him in driving down his opinion. He's in my school of the kind of guys that are advocates of natural looks. How can you have fifteen hair extensions that you haven't worn up to twice and crave to buy more? Now, it's really not about the money, but how can you skip church because of your natural hair?, like since that flowing hair flamboyance your fans are used to seeing you in, isn't there, you decide to stay at home. For that singular reason, I can stop wedding plans. Ladies take too much time and energy investing in rubbish. I can tell you for sure that, he's noticed that you are a very big weave/wigs freak, and he wants you to change that mindset that goes with the trends. Its not that you can't fix your wigs once in a while, it just shdnt erase your natural look nd self esteem. Check the deeper lifers, don't they look superb in their naturals?, or the hajias in their hijab, they look beautiful I want a very smart, career driven, natural woman.
And am sure you don't have hair like me....pele ti e....newaiz if you wanna be with him den the condition isn't too much just let him knw that he shd stl allow you wear the weaves once in a while.I hope those weaves of your aint the heavy ones??
you re fake to start with, if not y dnt u like ur natural hair? Ur boyfrnd is evn wasting his tym with a non proud african like u. U like fake oyibo hair.. See ur life
yo it aint by force if you love ur wigs or weaves or whatever wanna you call it more than him then you know what to do. Dude is tryna tell you to be natural in every way and you busy worrying about some fake hair.
There is a word called compromise. You both must learn it if you want to get married and want the marriage to work. What is his reason for disliking weaves, he met you wearing them. However, whatever we do, we must do in moderation. Could it be you are one of those ladies whose hair people never see. Negotiate with him and be sincere enough to keep your word. Tell him you will reduce how often you carry weaves. So maybe you ensure a balance of 6 months with and without weaves throughout the year, alternating them of course. On a lighter note,may be he can't stand the smell from your hair and can't imagine enduring it all his life lol
How old are you. If you are more than 30. Do his wish. But if not up to, my dear challenge his wish, give him a gap for other suitors. He should learn how to respect your personal decisions as a woman
Men and their complains here n dere,well,I guess u guys can still sit n talk abt it.but if he insist,den do as he wishes,dere r oda beautiful natural style u can do to ur hair n u will look amazing.lochigbo@yahoo.com
Hehehe enh natural hair styles is wats in vogue now, buh serzly he doesn't wana marry u so he gave u a absurd ultimatum,den y did he ask u out in d 1st place. Wat ev wit him abeg
If u love him, then dump d weaves n wigs. I just did without any man telling me to do so. Felt someow, initially but girl, am rocking my low cut now n I don see say I was spending so much on weaves. U can actually try finding out why he hates weaves n wig. Lastly, pray to God about it n b sure he is ur man.
In the real world,men hate all the artificial stuffs lyk wig and make up women put on... And they dont even know we do it for dem hoping they wont hav any course to complain abt being unkept dirty and hoping They wont look elsewher for solace.....
See enh.... if u know u cant do without emm wigs, forget the marriage ishhh.... its a lifetym commitment n u deserve to b hapie in it......
If u ask him to stop hanging out late wth frnds, will he oblige??? Hw can u b carrying year natural hair all ur life no be say e long sef...... him chop juju ni??
My dear the choice is yours,don't start what you cannot finish. Y must he propose with conditions? I wonder what will happen when he eventually marries you. Be yourself and not another
But he can fuck you with ur weaves on abi? Smh. Jux walk away if only you can cope with that for the rest of your life. Dunno why he asked you out at first, was he blind?
Later he will tell you not to hang around with friends and family. Na you sabi sha. Man when go dey run shows for outside later with girls when wear weaves so. Just cut your hair low cut make you marry. Once you stop wearing weaves, I'll marry you. Rubbish. Full of himself man.
I am a woman and used to be a weave/wig lover. Looked around me one day and realised how funny and similar we all look with our funny weaves. Dumping the weave is not a bad idea. You however have a point about the compromise bit, is this the only subject that he is unbending about or is that his way?
Not alll men love der woman bn artificial, he wnts u 2 b always natural n is gud. 4go d weaves n move on wt ur marriage plans or stick 2 ur weaves n remain in ur dad's aos 4eva. Am a weave freak n I use to fix 4 365days b4 bt now, I can't remember d last tym I fix cos my man doesn't lyk it so learn 2 make ur man happy 2. God bless u
I dont think I like that too.. Hoping my babe will understand when I tell her that. I love my girl natural. Hate d smell of those attatchments. If u love him, go for it. To u it seems u will feel incomplete when u aint wearing one. That is infiriority complex. ... Samoyooyo
Dear LIB reader,if this guy sincerely loves you he should respect what you like especially things that mean no harm.He should stop using that as an excuse. Every woman loves to look gorgeous and does not toy with hairdo .If he doesn't want to marry you pls move on with ur life,there are better men out there. #SmithDaGreat#
He doesn't really love u. I think d reason people get married is because they love each other and want to be together. He's giving u an ultimatum feels like getting married to u is doing u a favour.... I dunno but I don't think u should Giv up ur weaves for him
young Lady, if the man cannot take you as you are please just wait for the right person.what kind of condition is that?.pls stay on your own.cos in the long run, you will become miserable in the marriage .what,s the point of being married when u are not happy.please let him look for a deeper life woman to marry.the guy does not really want to marry you.read in between the lines.
My Dear, you have to think about it deeply, is this man worth sacrificing ur weaves for? Is he the kind of husband you've always wanted? Is he the kinda Man U want to father ur kids? Cos I also went through something close to yours, I love changing hairstyles, I make my hair for 2yrs then cut it down to go on low cut for another year, den after, start all over again, always loved it but when i stated dating my now Husband, he said no more low cuts, & we've been married for 2yrs plus, I haven't cut my hair for six years now, though I miss it a lot, but I did it for him & trust me, He's totally worth it, another thing, Hubby doesn't like Brazilian hair, since he found out it was real human hair & he watch a documentary on how Indians cut their hairs to sell it, he said no more brazillin hair for me, & I'm not angry, I just do simple weavons and braids, He has sacrificed a lot for me, I cld do same for him too & we have a great marriage no doubt. So you come to a compromise with him, tell him you wld fix the simple weavons, something decent and classy, he might understand. He might understand.
Linda dear, we know this is u talking.. if u like don't remove dat weavon n go n do shuku. Stay there n be looking till u reach 40. Bia nu, if u don't post my comment ehn... okbye
Just pray to God. Also ask him questions. And discuss more. Rem wat u cant handle during courtship, u cant during marriage. Do not form just to please him for marriage sake. Think it deep. Marriage is more than weavon
First I want 2 say I love natural hair. But u can compromise if you love him and If he usually compromises 4 u. But if his own is 2 dish out orders n give ultimatums like abeg is he the only guy in the wrld 2 marry then Hell no cos he'll keep acting that way. But think this through 'some1 loves u natural, just the way u are!' that's awesome or mayb he's a deeper lifer..lol ----C21
Natural hair is in now and big babes r trying 2 rock it. It works 4 some, its a mess 4 others. But babe wetin no dy ya mind ehn... Think u giv it a try and see if u lik it 1st. But ds kin man wey na hair e dy take propose. Ds 1 serious so???..... #sexynerd
Cus of weave?? R u kidding me?? Dat shld neva be a problem for someone who loves you well. And if ur natural hair is ok and healthy den u can be on it since you love him.
He's not serious about marrying you dear; were you on natural hair when he fell for you?.. It's a sign of him not wanting to commit, thus, coming up with flimsy excuses as wigs n weaves.. Un-love him!
That guy is very proud. Why didn't he go for a girl that only goes natural. For some men, it's a real deal-breaker like a phobia. He wont be able to last a date not to talk of 11 months. He's just a fake. He might just be scared of the financial implication on the long run. How many African women does he see without weaves. He even has the audacity to tell you that he CAN'T marry you (a girl that uses weaves). I think you are even foolish not to get him. So, what has he been doing with you since 11 months when he knows you have no future together? He hasn't even proposed, he's already threatning. It sounds more like since you love your weaves so much and I don't, let's quit it or (maybe) get married with me as the Master. IF you agree to this and get married, one day, he'll tell you to stop retouching your hair cos he likes virgin hair. Then, he'll tell you to cut your hair cos it's really gonna fit you and he likes it. Later, he'll start screening what you wear. Then he'll tell you not to sew skirts cos he doesn't see why a married woman is not so comfortable in wrappers. He'll start condemning your cosmetics, use of jewelry, shoes and ask who you're doing everything for because he loves you just the way you are. You start getting comfortable with your new way of life with a baby already and another on the way. He starts getting angry that you're not the same woman he fell inlove with that was modern, beautiful, confident, full of life and so different. You start to notice that he's cheating and you feel so lost and helpless and vunerable because he has broken you over the years and you have kids. You don't look as good as you used to and you stay in the marriage because of the children praying and hoping that the man you married comes back to you magically. All these can happen within 3 years or lower. You start asking yourself where you've gone wrong and you jst dnt get it. It's because you were to blind and unwise to see the handwritings and know that when a guy gives you an ultimatum or threaten you in a relationship, you stand your ground and not seem desperate or too comfortable with him. Let him see that you can do better than him and it's not a do or die affair. He is simply taking you for granted because he KNOWs that he can. Good luck, Dearie.
ANGELRAY SAYS, If u love or man then do wat he says, ways d big deal about weaves, I ve been on low cut for over 2 months cos days wat my man wants, and trust me it fits me so well that i now find it difficult to wear wig. Choose between ur man and artificial wig chikena.
But u hv said it all naa. A man who wnt compromise nw, wants to hv his way by force? Naaaa noor be him o. See d kind of flimsy ultimatum he's giving! Wen he met u were u carrying didi? Abeg nigga shud park well. Madam carry ur legs n move, I smell trouble. Then again, dis story sounds like ur own Linda Ikeji....lol. coz I knw u cnt do without ur weaves. So who is dis man naaa *wink wink* Anyhoo if it is u LIKEJI, d man has a point o....lol. we neva mistake see ya natural hair. Me want see am sef. U r a weave fanatic! Choi!!! Lol. My 1st advice still applies to u sha, on a srz note.
Lmao My hub told me same but dt was after marriage No he didnt give it to me as acondition. After wedding,weneva i am wtout makeup or jst removed my wig or weaves,he wl so compliment me. He wl always tell me' baby u see,u look so beautiful now u r natural. I wl always ignore him and continue wt my wig. Wen eva i am wt weaves or make up, and i ask him how beautifl i look. He wl reply by telling me dt am still beautifl but more beautifl wtout all d extras. This continued fr more dn 2 yrs till i eventually decided to stop. Now i dnt make up,wear weaves or wig and he loves me more now. Ur bot friend sldnt v given it to u as a condition. Hes not serious at all. And if u r sleeping wt him,then he s jst using u,till he finds his desired person
Marriage or love is not conditional. Although many men like natural woman. For me, i don't like to touch a woman who has wake over all over her face. So do the guy a favour and put away all those wigs.
Well, u decide which u can live witout.. Ur weaves or ur man. Also, u ve knwn him 11mnths en if dis is d 1st "adamant" unltimatum he has put 2u, den u jst being childish. I'm sure u can rock ur natural hair en still turn heads. Ask Ms. Kedike ow she manages.
This is hilarious!! Well I don't know which is your priority, your wig/weave? or your man? I don't see anything difficult in having ur natural hair. If you love him, then you'll do it for him.
my dear he's looking for a slave not a wife. wasn't it the weave that attracted him in the first place? marry him and be reduced to nothing. he'll still chase girls with weaves. mschewww
And how more ultimatum is he gonna come up with? I serious dislike men with plenty irrelevant laws!.. Agree to dis one and another will emerge!.. Trade carefully!..#teamchris
If you love eim obey first,let him propose and after the wedding you can try nd sort tinz out wif him na.u're a woman u shld knw hw u turn ur man nd get ur man
If u can't live with den dnt accept cos u wan marry, besides since he can't comprise I dnt see why u still dey dere...u already answered urself anyway cos a guy lyk dat sounds like a control manipulative freak.
Ma own is...if d guy really loves u, he ll accept u for wu u are.love aint meant to b conditional,he apparently hs bn deceivin u for d past 11mths so dunt start deceivin ursef nw cos marriage is a life tym fin..u cnt carry ur natural hair for a lyf tym I tink u shuld tel him dat.. Above all seek d face of God nd let him lead u...
My dear in my honest opinion,relationship is al bout compromising nd lyin low 4 d oda@times wen u feel ure in luv wit dt person.so if u feel ure in luv wit him 2 d extent of compromisn ur weaves,den I feel its somtin uve 2 do dts if its d only tin he wants u 2 stop doin...linda I don't no y ur blog application has nt updated 4 2dys nw oh,pls try nd luk in2 it oh
I think its plain wrong for an adult to be given this sort of unnecessary ultimatums. Thats if the weaves arent tacky and loud. Isnt worn too long to become smelly and not unnaturaly long. I dont see why it shuld be an issue. Anyways.. if you can live with such dictatorial style.. goood, but that sort of attitude gets worse later.. creeping into other aspects of your relationship with him.
Maybe u carry it for too long and it smells and he doesn't know how to tell you. Tell him u can try but weaves are quite convenient. Instead of combing and creaming ur hair every day. BTW our weather doesn't favour out hair type. That's a flimsy reason. But I advice you carry ur weaves for a shorter amount of time and try using 8-10 inches of well sewn human hair, or better still use that human hair to fix pony tail. It will look natural. Try it. Good luck
If he truly loves as he said he won't be bothered and lest I forget why didn't he chyke does ladies that doesn't wear weaves abeg free am joor,he should take you for who you are and not try to bend you to his own rules.Nobody can be changed except they want to
Dis one na gobe. Are u sure there are no more rules and regulations? Dats wot u hv to find out first before he tells u he doesn't like a woman who breathes.
Your reasons for being scared are very meaningful but then you said you want to marry him, i guess you cant eat your cake and have it. I'm a guy, I dont agree with him bossing you in this manner, tell him to meet meet you half way, reduce how often you wear the wigs. Dont know if he is cared of buying them for the rest of his life or if they just look ugly, whatever the case may be he should meet you half way.
There is nothing wrong with being natural gf, try it out...if u like it stick with it...if u don't den start hunting for a new man...goodluck with that
Rubbish! If he loves u, he shud love everything abt u and not try to change u. He is not the one, look elsewhr unless u ar so desperate to marry. My opinion
You must not give in. He's a selfish and unreasonable man. How does your looking great in weaves affect his life? You will probably get married and he would ask you to stop taking care of your nails or something silly like that! And this is the type of man that would go out there and be having affairs with chics in the same weaves he doesn't want you on! Sister please ditch his sorry ass if he can't look beyond weaves to see what a great person you are.
Get rid of your wigs and keep your man hun! Weaves won't keep you warm at night when you're single, depressed and over the hill.
It's a simple request, he wants the real you. It won't be easy especially if your hair is tough to manage, but haven't you heard? #TEAMNATURAL is the way forward, so just do it. Why should the thought of wearing the hair God gave you be so horrifying??
Kudos to him for speaking out against artificial women. If more men did it maybe more women will be natural and happy. #TeamNaturalAbeg
Hmmm.in dis century,well I don't know about you.but me I know I can't. Let him go and look for another girl to marry.natural hair ke.does he know the stress to carry natural hair alone.my dear think twice oh. Cos the next thing is ur make -up trousers and many more. Hisssssssd
Be naturally, dats d probs we are having wit u ladies, finger,toes,eyes,hair,bottom,breast...even face...everytin fake,try 2 appriciate some tinz in ur body
Try to make him understand why you can't stop wearing weaves, if it is his church doctrine or sumtin else..but my own opinion of a man like dis is a No No..dt's 2 harsh of him..
My advice is u please him 1st as a woman u have 2b obedient to ur man wen eve 1st exit she doesn't nw wah is called weaves.wiff time u wil change his mind buh listen 2him 1st
come on dear,u have said it all,and believe me it wont just stop at weaves..a man should love you for who you truly are and always respects your feelings,and decissions.he should respect you as well..i hate it when people impose conditions on others when it comes to love..love is unconditonal..dont be surprised..he mite be digging in on other girls with weaves..
You're right: you love your weaves and he's too controlling. Dump him. He's right too: weaves are ridiculous. I wouldn't marry a person who always had a rug pinned to her head.
He shouldn't have wasted your time. You shouldn't waste any more of your time. Happy independence day.
Time wey him see u,u carry natural hair?Madam no worry urself dat guy never serious.I bet u if u obey dis one,more ultimatum are still coming from now till una two old die...................................ALIWAHAB
Tell him you accept on one condition, that he starts braiding his hair and start applying make up. oh yes!! my dear he wants to get rid of you knowing you will not accept. mtcheew
Abeg didn't he see u with weave d day he wooed u? Let him waka pass. The man who will love u for who u are and what u represent will come ur way. Don't lose sleep pls. U will even love d new man more.
WTF!!! He is not serious, what has weaves or wigs got to do with making a marriage successful. He doesn't love you because that's a silly excuse for me because even if you don't use weaves or wigs that doesn't still guaranty you marriage with him #onelovefromSnow#
Tbh i don't think i can NEVER wife a lady that wears weaves. I can manage make-ups but weaves?.. Hell no. I can mess around with them, but to put a ring on it? Nah. NEVER!! #JustBeingHORNest#HappyIndependenceDay#
think of your last statement...as a vice versa kinda thing if you insist on still wearing your weave, you would become "that man" who is adamant on having his way. if you actually love him, but he doesn't like unnatural hair.. and that's his proposal, then you have to choose between your wigs and your man
Just imagine he is unemployed and not searching for work..you would likely tell him to get a job before he can marry you right? now that is you trying to change him..and may seem to him as you are tryna "have your way"
Dnt mind him,didnt he see you with weaves before?mine tld me not to use makeups at all,i was forced to comply cos i love him,after 5yrs now,he had dumped me cos i wasnt attractive anymore,now am with a guy who even gives me money to buy makeups and cosmetics.Make the wise decisions,he might nt want you to look attractive to other men,if he also cannot respect your opinion then u'll av to mayb reconsider it.
Linda...Biko...Post my Comment.. sharemezng@gmail.com
ReplyDeleteRUN!!!
ReplyDeleteToday is weaves and Wigs,tomorrow might be white powder
ReplyDeleteQuit wearing the weaves then and keep it natural for him,since that's what makes him happy,sometimes we have to bend the rules
ReplyDeleteLol. This is really funny! Like for real I don't understand his reason o! But anyway you guys should sort things out talk.
ReplyDeleteYour comment will be visible after approval
Shut up already... Mtcheeew
ReplyDeletei think Linda is in the best position to tell you if she can love any man more than her weaves, lmaoooo, I doubt it. my dear, i don't know how that concerns us, you have already said u will marry him, weaves or not.
ReplyDeleteHahahahahahhahaha..........anty linda dis is realy funny,weave?? She dosnt hv a case,......if she realy love d guy,she will not tink it twice b4 taking it off,she is even lucky dt d guy open up to her,...........she is not getting any younger_aliyuboniface@gmail.com
ReplyDeleteDon't marry him,period.
ReplyDeleteHahahahahahhahaha..........anty linda dis is realy funny,weave?? She dosnt hv a case,......if she realy love d guy,she will not tink it twice b4 taking it off,she is even lucky dt d guy open up to her,...........she is not getting any younger_aliyuboniface@gmail.com
ReplyDeleteHahahahahahhahaha..........anty linda dis is realy funny,weave?? She dosnt hv a case,......if she realy love d guy,she will not tink it twice b4 taking it off,she is even lucky dt d guy open up to her,...........she is not getting any younger_aliyuboniface@gmail.com
ReplyDeleteHahahahahahhahaha..........anty linda dis is realy funny,weave?? She dosnt hv a case,......if she realy love d guy,she will not tink it twice b4 taking it off,she is even lucky dt d guy open up to her,...........she is not getting any younger_aliyuboniface@gmail.com
ReplyDeleteTo ba ko waju sie ko ta,to ba ko eyin sie ko ta, to ba ku iwo nikan ko tu ero arare pa!
ReplyDeleteHahahahahahhahaha..........anty linda dis is realy funny,weave?? She dosnt hv a case,......if she realy love d guy,she will not tink it twice b4 taking it off,she is even lucky dt d guy open up to her,...........she is not getting any younger_aliyuboniface@gmail.com
ReplyDeleteLmao....d guy dey secure he and he children future nah....he no wan dey buy Japanese Malaysia and American hair up and down. ..prolly ure a weave freak dts y...so my dear learn how to start making Ghana weavings and dem braids
ReplyDeleteDidt d mumu man meant u carry weaves, u beta give urself brain.
ReplyDeleteRemove ur weave and marry him, moreso u can be braiding ur hair with either wool or attachment, it make u look younger and naturally beautiful, weave mak one look older
ReplyDeleteMarry ur weaves den. Ewu
ReplyDeleteNa which kain useless condition be dat?dats how u girls 'll goan enter hell say na marriage. Did he not see girls with natural hair?why is he not dating them?becos dere's something unique about you bah? I pity u. You beta run for ur life. Love aint enof to get married.
ReplyDeleteHmmm... if this is not for religious reasons, then this man would not respect your opinions and freedom of expression after marriage. I hope u can cope with that!
ReplyDeleteAre your wigs going to follow u to d grave? There are so many things u can so with your natural hair even finer than the wigs u wear, my sister u had better do what he wants since u said u love n want to marry him before one sister with natural hair hijacks him
ReplyDeleteMy two cents
Follow ur heart,but he shouldn't impose nw rather tell u minimaze d use of it.May be u spend 2 much on weave
ReplyDeleteThe both of you should compromise, for me am sure you can do without your weaves, if you believe in prayers them you can take the matter to God in prayers. Nothing is too small to pray about. Ayatonito.
ReplyDeletelookn for a place to buy stuffs at unbelievable prices online? am wondering why you haven't checked this out yet : http://www.konga.com/?k_id=neduchi
ReplyDeleteI wonda wats wrong wif wearn weaves as long as u keep ur hair neat n healthy..... Buh seriously dis guy is d type dah keeps asking yu to giv up tins yu luv. He's a wacko sewiously....
ReplyDeleteRubbish... Him no love you 100th to comment cassey.matthews@yahoo.com
ReplyDelete# Laughsohard..
ReplyDeletenow he wants you to drop Ur weaves before he can purpose but he has been dating u with them on, just be careful, once u yield to one Ur gonna yield to all, you'll probably have to drop Ur life on one occasion
marriage ain't everything.
don't make it seem Ur desperate..
chill.. focus on making urself, the right man will come.he ain't gonna demand u changing
he's simply gonna love Ur imperfections,#perfectly.#
Wendy
okaforwendylilian@gmail.com
if he's doing this because he's a born again Christian then its not terrible. ..force u to do it is being too pushy
ReplyDelete# Laughsohard..
ReplyDeletenow he wants you to drop Ur weaves before he can purpose but he has been dating u with them on, just be careful, once u yield to one Ur gonna yield to all, you'll probably have to drop Ur life on one occasion
marriage ain't everything.
don't make it seem Ur desperate..
chill.. focus on making urself, the right man will come.he ain't gonna demand u changing
he's simply gonna love Ur imperfections,#perfectly.#
Wendy
okaforwendylilian@gmail.com
Abeg u ppl should rest with your jamb questions biko. Some ppl sure do have time on their hands!!!
ReplyDeleteYou just have to listen to him. Nd besides natural hair is the best. This is my first time to comment on your blog.
ReplyDeleteMtcheeeew!what a way to start my day.as for me y am not married yet is because am still amending some necessary things in my relationship.yes I know I can't change a man but things like this matter if it were me I will try to change it but if I can't i will let the man go.the problems we ladies have is that we get so scared that if this man goes,no other will come,then we start calculating age and so on.bcos of these filmsy excuses ladies are married like they are sold.when u get home u won't av a single say at home as if u are a slave.let a woman try to get at least 80% comfort u were receiving while in our family's home biko
ReplyDeleteMtcheeeew!what a way to start my day.as for me y am not married yet is because am still amending some necessary things in my relationship.yes I know I can't change a man but things like this matter if it were me I will try to change it but if I can't i will let the man go.the problems we ladies have is that we get so scared that if this man goes,no other will come,then we start calculating age and so on.bcos of these filmsy excuses ladies are married like they are sold.when u get home u won't av a single say at home as if u are a slave.let a woman try to get at least 80% comfort u were receiving while in our family's home biko
ReplyDeleteenhhh continue with ur wigs naaaa, as if u brought dem from heaven. Dnt worry look for the guy that loves wigs.....yeye nan tu... oDC
ReplyDeleteYou guys should talk tins out and come to a compromise. if he refuses and u insist on keeping ur wig, then quite d relationship. helenmissy27@gmail.com
ReplyDeleteLinda i am sure it is you, cos you too like your weaves
ReplyDeleteDon't marry him,period
ReplyDeleteYetaygel@gmail.com
ReplyDeleteIt is not about the weaves honey! There is a more fundamental issue here.I know men like this.He is a control freak.He will keep you at home when he marries you.you will end up jobless and unattractive. While he will be out there dating girls with weaves. If he feels so strongly about it , while did he get involve with you to start with? There are a lot of girls without weaves, why not date those girls?
ReplyDeletewhat!!! hmmm, really dont know what to say..sorry. zumafrances@gmail.com
ReplyDeleteJust follow ur hrth
ReplyDeletelmfao!!! this is hilarious.
ReplyDeleteLady,choose you this day whom you love more,your MAN or your WEAVES? its not that hard,darling! lol
Dats what he wants if u can abide by it den marry him... I told my wife same things but I didn't make it a bait...she willingly start planting her natural hair and I love it so much.. If you love him OBEY
ReplyDeleteHehehehe sounds funny tho.
ReplyDeleteWho knows what next he might ask of you,but you never complained of his love for you. If you feel he's the right person for you asides the wig and weaves,do away with them and keep your man.
~BONARIO~says so via NOKIA LUMIA
Wats does oga ve with wigs and weaves??? My dear u knw wat u want,listen to ur hrt,b4 oga will tell u one day dat u stop having frnds,wearing trousers etc
ReplyDelete#######LIB MY BAD HABIT########
This must be linda. Hehhehhehehhehehehe
ReplyDeleteObey.
ReplyDeleteYou love and want to marry him. Don't come here tomorrow to whine about how hard and authoritative he is o. He saw you with wig and weaves and still dated you and now he is giving you condition for marriage,didn't he see it before? My friend if you love weaves and will not be happy loosing it pls forget the primitive man. Has it occured to you that if you agree to this,you will waer natural hair on ur wedding day? If you no get front hair like me wetin u go do na? Look well before you leap o. Who is urs will accept you with all ur warts.
ReplyDeleteKenaan brian..
The guy is not serious...mtschewwww
ReplyDeleteWe are always d cause of Our own plans, wt kind of an excuse is ur man givin u. An abusive relationship is not only dt which d man beats his woman, dis rite here is an abusive relationship n like I would always say never go stay cos u feel u can manage it's a lifetime journey.
ReplyDeleteRun run run!!!!! Its jst an excuse because he very well knows you love your weaves
ReplyDeletema dear its not only the weave he is worried about, but other artificial things u myt possess so my advice. consider stopping the use of other artificials too. it will turn problem later o
ReplyDeleteSweetheart, if he can't love and accept you with your weaves, then i don't think he is for you.. of
ReplyDeleteall the important thngs a man should look out for in a woman, i think weaves shouldnt even be on that list.. Don't get tiedup in smthn u might regret later.. Also pray up!...Kiraa.
You are in the best position to solve ur issues, can u stop wearing d weaves?, wat if u stop and he wants to change something about u again, so just think about it and see if u can live with a man dat might decide to change u totally into wat he wants and not who u are
ReplyDeleteomo d niggah no wan spend money on u after marriage
ReplyDeletefirst comment
happy new month y'all
A man that really loves should not put an ultimatum for marriage. It should be a matter of understanding and compromise. Black women wear weaves mostly because our natural hair is hard to manage. The weaves are easier to manage. You can really talk to him and explain and reach a compromise. A man who is insensitive to your feelings and opinion will also prove to be that way in other issues. I hope you guys work this out
ReplyDeleteThere are other things he'd stop you from doing when you finally get in and you'd find it ridiculous. Run now before it get's late. There's a thin line between love and hate.
ReplyDeleteAbeg don't listen to him if u marry him ur marriage will be based on command. If he wants to propose he will propose without looking at the weaves. U love him yes but learn to stand on ur feet.
ReplyDeleteVery simple, if u love him then do his wish(eleyele1@yhoo.com)
ReplyDeleteYou sure know what to do. Stop wearing waves and get married. Vote Linda Ikeji as the Most Active Blogger of the year. www.socialmediameritawards.com/vote.php
ReplyDeleteThis doesn't make any sense to me.... has weave killed anyone he knws?. na wa oh. But are you allowed to braid? Ask him. Yeah men like this might end up enslaving u wen u'r married.after marriage d next thing he'ld say is don't keep frnds, or don't invite family members or even stop working. My dear you have to sit him down and talk to him before its too late. He shld be able to meet you half way if he truly loves you. Pray and be wise!
ReplyDeleteHa..in this Morden world..I inw fit shout..is it against his religion or wht? Why ask u out in d 1st place whn he saw weaves on u tht day..its complicated ooO..if not wig or weaves wht den? ★ain't gonna agree on tht bullshit
ReplyDeleteI dunno why he'll insist...buh d choice is urs; who/what do u love more, ur man or ur hair.
ReplyDeleteI dunno why he'll insist...buh d choice is urs; who/what do u love more, ur man or ur hair.
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteEd Dreams and Aliyu Boniface are such nonentities, foolish beings and cash hunters!! Stop commenting 25times on a single piece of news... are u born retards or just daft from ur mommas womb? Its wednesday already! If you avnt been notified that u won already then it means u havent qualified! which i strongly doubt u would ever be btw! Awon ode meji!
Ma, you need to take time to think it through. Much as a man can tell what he likes, if he hangs his marring you on weaves it means that his priorities may be a little bit questionable. That's because when you love some one, you need to accept the person for whom they are and if that person loves you back, they will change to please you. Think twice before you commit to this man because he will surely be a controlling husband.
ReplyDeleteAfter 11months u want to marry? no wonder marriages fail.
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteEd Dreams and Aliyu Boniface are such nonentities, foolish beings and cash hunters!! Stop commenting 25times on a single piece of news... are u born retards or just daft from ur mommas womb? Its wednesday already! If you avnt been notified that u won already then it means u havent qualified! which i strongly doubt u would ever be btw! Awon ode meji!
He has told u his mind and wat he wants. If u indeed love him, u'd do as he says. And if u can't do dat, I guess u start looking elsewr for anoda man who is ready to live wit a woman wit weaves and wigs
ReplyDeleteNa original gbege be dat ooo. D guy is just too stingy, he knows how costly weaves n wigs are so he is trying to avoid d expenses. I will advise u to reduce how u wear weaves n go natural but if he insist dat u shld not wear it @all Dats bad. D decision is urs but I believe if he truly loves u, he won't be adamant. Wise up girl marrying dat type of guy won't be easy
ReplyDeletethen stp it. Badguy39@nokiamail.com
ReplyDeletethen stop wearing wig .. mayb the man wanna c more of natural AFRICAN WOMAN forevermadekels@yahoo.com
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteOgbeni, go throwey that stupid weaves or get married to it! Maybe your natural hair is what turns him on or hes just noticed your weaves are not impressing , out of dates or you look terrible wearing them! Simply ask him the reason ....NEXXXXXT !
That's a whole lot of sacrifice,try to find out what his reasons are,and ask him if he will prefer you go bald.
ReplyDeleteFaceoflib
A MAN THAT ALWAYS WANT YOU 2 DO WHAT HE DESIRES DOES NOT TRULY LOVE YOU. #####QUEENMAYA#####
ReplyDeleteYou are talking about forever and a day with him,please don't make a promise you can't keep.if you promise not to go on weave only God knows the next thing he will tell u to stop doing
ReplyDeleteWhat is more important to you ? Your weave or your MAn? Do the right thing.
ReplyDeleteHMMMMM SHORT OF WORDS
ReplyDelete.
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FROM NWA NKWERRE
NONYG.NG@GMAIL.COM
If u love him den respect his decision den if not go ur way...dear emmanuel don nuel via Facebook Linda ur bros. Nwa imo nwa mbano....
ReplyDeleteSorry we cant help u here,thats ur palavar
ReplyDeleteBefore he met u, were u not carrying weave, if he really loves u, he wud marry u. I don't think I can do that.
ReplyDeleteko si ona nibe lol please dump his ass, didn't he see your wig before coming to meet you?
ReplyDeleteI onced dated a girl that was addicted to hair extensions, wigs etc. We quarrelled frequently about it. She even skipped church and classes when she's on her natural hair; I used to always ask her, have u lost ur self confidence?
ReplyDeletePoster, while I try to see reasons with why he shouldn't be so rigid over an issue as flippant as this, I will also join him in driving down his opinion. He's in my school of the kind of guys that are advocates of natural looks. How can you have fifteen hair extensions that you haven't worn up to twice and crave to buy more? Now, it's really not about the money, but how can you skip church because of your natural hair?, like since that flowing hair flamboyance your fans are used to seeing you in, isn't there, you decide to stay at home. For that singular reason, I can stop wedding plans.
Ladies take too much time and energy investing in rubbish. I can tell you for sure that, he's noticed that you are a very big weave/wigs freak, and he wants you to change that mindset that goes with the trends. Its not that you can't fix your wigs once in a while, it just shdnt erase your natural look nd self esteem. Check the deeper lifers, don't they look superb in their naturals?, or the hajias in their hijab, they look beautiful I want a very smart, career driven, natural woman.
Be wise!
2B246089
Seriously 4 me I dnt tink dancing 2 his turn is a wise tin 2 do follow ur hrt ~ice princess~
ReplyDeleteAnd am sure you don't have hair like me....pele ti e....newaiz if you wanna be with him den the condition isn't too much just let him knw that he shd stl allow you wear the weaves once in a while.I hope those weaves of your aint the heavy ones??
ReplyDeleteSearch ur heart n decide which yu prefer... Yu hv to mk a choice
ReplyDeleteyou re fake to start with, if not y dnt u like ur natural hair? Ur boyfrnd is evn wasting his tym with a non proud african like u. U like fake oyibo hair.. See ur life
ReplyDeleteyo it aint by force if you love ur wigs or weaves or whatever wanna you call it more than him then you know what to do. Dude is tryna tell you to be natural in every way and you busy worrying about some fake hair.
ReplyDeleteThere is a word called compromise. You both must learn it if you want to get married and want the marriage to work. What is his reason for disliking weaves, he met you wearing them.
ReplyDeleteHowever, whatever we do, we must do in moderation. Could it be you are one of those ladies whose hair people never see. Negotiate with him and be sincere enough to keep your word. Tell him you will reduce how often you carry weaves. So maybe you ensure a balance of 6 months with and without weaves throughout the year, alternating them of course.
On a lighter note,may be he can't stand the smell from your hair and can't imagine enduring it all his life lol
How old are you. If you are more than 30. Do his wish. But if not up to, my dear challenge his wish, give him a gap for other suitors. He should learn how to respect your personal decisions as a woman
ReplyDeleteMen and their complains here n dere,well,I guess u guys can still sit n talk abt it.but if he insist,den do as he wishes,dere r oda beautiful natural style u can do to ur hair n u will look amazing.lochigbo@yahoo.com
ReplyDeleteHehehe enh natural hair styles is wats in vogue now, buh serzly he doesn't wana marry u so he gave u a absurd ultimatum,den y did he ask u out in d 1st place. Wat ev wit him abeg
ReplyDeleteIf u love him, then dump d weaves n wigs. I just did without any man telling me to do so. Felt someow, initially but girl, am rocking my low cut now n I don see say I was spending so much on weaves. U can actually try finding out why he hates weaves n wig. Lastly, pray to God about it n b sure he is ur man.
ReplyDeleteHahahahahahahahaha
ReplyDeleteIn the real world,men hate all the artificial stuffs lyk wig and make up women put on...
And they dont even know we do it for dem hoping they wont hav any course to complain abt being unkept dirty and hoping They wont look elsewher for solace.....
See enh.... if u know u cant do without emm wigs, forget the marriage ishhh.... its a lifetym commitment n u deserve to b hapie in it......
If u ask him to stop hanging out late wth frnds, will he oblige??? Hw can u b carrying year natural hair all ur life no be say e long sef...... him chop juju ni??
My dear run for ur life, dnt marry a dictator. Linda u never post my comments, did I offend u. Pls post this comment o
ReplyDeleteMy advise is listen to him & get settle down since u love him. Gbam!!!
ReplyDeleteBORN TO SHINE!!!
You can't do without em? Come on, those weaves make you look like a doll, go natural #teamnatural
ReplyDeleteMy dear the choice is yours,don't start what you cannot finish. Y must he propose with conditions? I wonder what will happen when he eventually marries you. Be yourself and not another
ReplyDeleteBut he can fuck you with ur weaves on abi? Smh. Jux walk away if only you can cope with that for the rest of your life. Dunno why he asked you out at first, was he blind?
ReplyDeleteabeg. did he not see u on weaves before he approached u? that's not an excuse if he wanted a natural person he would had simply gone for one.
ReplyDeleteFollow your heart not your mind
ReplyDeleteLater he will tell you not to hang around with friends and family. Na you sabi sha. Man when go dey run shows for outside later with girls when wear weaves so. Just cut your hair low cut make you marry. Once you stop wearing weaves, I'll marry you. Rubbish. Full of himself man.
ReplyDeleteI am a woman and used to be a weave/wig lover. Looked around me one day and realised how funny and similar we all look with our funny weaves. Dumping the weave is not a bad idea.
ReplyDeleteYou however have a point about the compromise bit, is this the only subject that he is unbending about or is that his way?
if i were you, he just became my "EX" real love should be unconditional.....corcake@yahoo.com
ReplyDeleteNot alll men love der woman bn artificial, he wnts u 2 b always natural n is gud. 4go d weaves n move on wt ur marriage plans or stick 2 ur weaves n remain in ur dad's aos 4eva. Am a weave freak n I use to fix 4 365days b4 bt now, I can't remember d last tym I fix cos my man doesn't lyk it so learn 2 make ur man happy 2. God bless u
ReplyDeleteI dont think I like that too.. Hoping my babe will understand when I tell her that. I love my girl natural. Hate d smell of those attatchments. If u love him, go for it. To u it seems u will feel incomplete when u aint wearing one. That is infiriority complex.
ReplyDelete... Samoyooyo
Dear LIB reader,if this guy sincerely loves you he should respect what you like especially things that mean no harm.He should stop using that as an excuse. Every woman loves to look gorgeous and does not toy with hairdo .If he doesn't want to marry you pls move on with ur life,there are better men out there.
ReplyDelete#SmithDaGreat#
He doesn't really love u. I think d reason people get married is because they love each other and want to be together. He's giving u an ultimatum feels like getting married to u is doing u a favour.... I dunno but I don't think u should Giv up ur weaves for him
ReplyDeleteden u 4get about it nd marri him
ReplyDeleteNo b man b that
ReplyDeleteFollow your instinct, because in the end the only decision that would matter is yours!
ReplyDeleteyoung Lady, if the man cannot take you as you are please just wait for the right person.what kind of condition is that?.pls stay on your own.cos in the long run, you will become miserable in the marriage .what,s the point of being married when u are not happy.please let him look for a deeper life woman to marry.the guy does not really want to marry you.read in between the lines.
ReplyDeleteMy Dear, you have to think about it deeply, is this man worth sacrificing ur weaves for? Is he the kind of husband you've always wanted? Is he the kinda Man U want to father ur kids? Cos I also went through something close to yours, I love changing hairstyles, I make my hair for 2yrs then cut it down to go on low cut for another year, den after, start all over again, always loved it but when i stated dating my now Husband, he said no more low cuts, & we've been married for 2yrs plus, I haven't cut my hair for six years now, though I miss it a lot, but I did it for him & trust me, He's totally worth it, another thing, Hubby doesn't like Brazilian hair, since he found out it was real human hair & he watch a documentary on how Indians cut their hairs to sell it, he said no more brazillin hair for me, & I'm not angry, I just do simple weavons and braids, He has sacrificed a lot for me, I cld do same for him too & we have a great marriage no doubt. So you come to a compromise with him, tell him you wld fix the simple weavons, something decent and classy, he might understand. He might understand.
ReplyDeleteLinda dear, we know this is u talking.. if u like don't remove dat weavon n go n do shuku. Stay there n be looking till u reach 40. Bia nu, if u don't post my comment ehn... okbye
ReplyDeleteSo if you love him d way you said just follow d instruction he gave you finish
ReplyDeleteJust pray to God. Also ask him questions. And discuss more. Rem wat u cant handle during courtship, u cant during marriage. Do not form just to please him for marriage sake. Think it deep. Marriage is more than weavon
ReplyDeletePray pray pray
ReplyDeleteControlling behaviour. Dump him now or regret forever!
ReplyDeleteFirst I want 2 say I love natural hair. But u can compromise if you love him and If he usually compromises 4 u. But if his own is 2 dish out orders n give ultimatums like abeg is he the only guy in the wrld 2 marry then Hell no cos he'll keep acting that way. But think this through 'some1 loves u natural, just the way u are!' that's awesome or mayb he's a deeper lifer..lol ----C21
ReplyDeletea.k.a EDWIN CHINEDU AZUBUKO said...
ReplyDelete.
Just leave the dude and go on with ur life. Eddreamzdreamer@gmail.com
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***CURRENTLY IN JUPITER***
a.k.a EDWIN CHINEDU AZUBUKO said...
ReplyDelete.
Just leave the dude and go on with ur life. Eddreamzdreamer@gmail.com
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***CURRENTLY IN JUPITER***
Natural hair is in now and big babes r trying 2 rock it. It works 4 some, its a mess 4 others. But babe wetin no dy ya mind ehn... Think u giv it a try and see if u lik it 1st. But ds kin man wey na hair e dy take propose. Ds 1 serious so???..... #sexynerd
ReplyDeleteYou are sick.You value you weaves more than your relationship.Sister,you need serious deliverance.People in your village are after you.
ReplyDeletea.k.a EDWIN CHINEDU AZUBUKO said...
ReplyDelete.
Just leave the dude and go on with ur life. Eddreamzdreamer@gmail.com
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***CURRENTLY IN JUPITER***
a.k.a EDWIN CHINEDU AZUBUKO said...
ReplyDelete.
Just leave the dude and go on with ur life. Eddreamzdreamer@gmail.com
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***CURRENTLY IN JUPITER***
lol funny... diff stories evryday.....
ReplyDeleteU better listen 2 him, dats ur mr right.
ReplyDeletestay without ur weave for a year and u will stay without it for years. .....joeswills@hotmail.com
ReplyDeleteCus of weave?? R u kidding me?? Dat shld neva be a problem for someone who loves you well. And if ur natural hair is ok and healthy den u can be on it since you love him.
ReplyDeleteHe's not serious about marrying you dear; were you on natural hair when he fell for you?.. It's a sign of him not wanting to commit, thus, coming up with flimsy excuses as wigs n weaves.. Un-love him!
ReplyDelete*My R1.50c comment*
That guy is very proud. Why didn't he go for a girl that only goes natural. For some men, it's a real deal-breaker like a phobia. He wont be able to last a date not to talk of 11 months. He's just a fake. He might just be scared of the financial implication on the long run. How many African women does he see without weaves. He even has the audacity to tell you that he CAN'T marry you (a girl that uses weaves). I think you are even foolish not to get him. So, what has he been doing with you since 11 months when he knows you have no future together? He hasn't even proposed, he's already threatning. It sounds more like since you love your weaves so much and I don't, let's quit it or (maybe) get married with me as the Master. IF you agree to this and get married, one day, he'll tell you to stop retouching your hair cos he likes virgin hair. Then, he'll tell you to cut your hair cos it's really gonna fit you and he likes it. Later, he'll start screening what you wear. Then he'll tell you not to sew skirts cos he doesn't see why a married woman is not so comfortable in wrappers. He'll start condemning your cosmetics, use of jewelry, shoes and ask who you're doing everything for because he loves you just the way you are. You start getting comfortable with your new way of life with a baby already and another on the way. He starts getting angry that you're not the same woman he fell inlove with that was modern, beautiful, confident, full of life and so different. You start to notice that he's cheating and you feel so lost and helpless and vunerable because he has broken you over the years and you have kids. You don't look as good as you used to and you stay in the marriage because of the children praying and hoping that the man you married comes back to you magically. All these can happen within 3 years or lower. You start asking yourself where you've gone wrong and you jst dnt get it. It's because you were to blind and unwise to see the handwritings and know that when a guy gives you an ultimatum or threaten you in a relationship, you stand your ground and not seem desperate or too comfortable with him. Let him see that you can do better than him and it's not a do or die affair. He is simply taking you for granted because he KNOWs that he can. Good luck, Dearie.
ReplyDeleteAnd its like d weave u carry r wired, and clourful cus if der r normal clourez like black he will neva complain
ReplyDeleteThen marry him if u love him,wig or no weave..olabode82@yahoo.co.uk
ReplyDeleteOh great, a man who doesn't want to marry a woman who is adamant on hiding her insecurities. Can't exist without weave? Wow!
ReplyDeleteLinda can you hear? Linda is this you? LOL!
ReplyDeleteANGELRAY SAYS, If u love or man then do wat he says, ways d big deal about weaves, I ve been on low cut for over 2 months cos days wat my man wants, and trust me it fits me so well that i now find it difficult to wear wig. Choose between ur man and artificial wig chikena.
ReplyDeleteBut u hv said it all naa. A man who wnt compromise nw, wants to hv his way by force? Naaaa noor be him o. See d kind of flimsy ultimatum he's giving! Wen he met u were u carrying didi? Abeg nigga shud park well. Madam carry ur legs n move, I smell trouble.
ReplyDeleteThen again, dis story sounds like ur own Linda Ikeji....lol. coz I knw u cnt do without ur weaves. So who is dis man naaa *wink wink* Anyhoo if it is u LIKEJI, d man has a point o....lol. we neva mistake see ya natural hair. Me want see am sef. U r a weave fanatic! Choi!!! Lol. My 1st advice still applies to u sha, on a srz note.
He must be a joker.he should HV said DAT He is no longer comfortable with da relationship n DAT he is only using da weave as excuse
ReplyDeleteLmao
ReplyDeleteMy hub told me same but dt was after marriage
No he didnt give it to me as acondition.
After wedding,weneva i am wtout makeup or jst removed my wig or weaves,he wl so compliment me. He wl always tell me' baby u see,u look so beautiful now u r natural. I wl always ignore him and continue wt my wig. Wen eva i am wt weaves or make up, and i ask him how beautifl i look. He wl reply by telling me dt am still beautifl but more beautifl wtout all d extras. This continued fr more dn 2 yrs till i eventually decided to stop. Now i dnt make up,wear weaves or wig and he loves me more now. Ur bot friend sldnt v given it to u as a condition. Hes not serious at all. And if u r sleeping wt him,then he s jst using u,till he finds his desired person
Na deeper life man ooo. Xcuse ursef ma
ReplyDeleteMarriage or love is not conditional. Although many men like natural woman. For me, i don't like to touch a woman who has wake over all over her face. So do the guy a favour and put away all those wigs.
ReplyDeleteWell, u decide which u can live witout.. Ur weaves or ur man.
ReplyDeleteAlso, u ve knwn him 11mnths en if dis is d 1st "adamant" unltimatum he has put 2u, den u jst being childish. I'm sure u can rock ur natural hair en still turn heads. Ask Ms. Kedike ow she manages.
This is hilarious!! Well I don't know which is your priority, your wig/weave? or your man? I don't see anything difficult in having ur natural hair. If you love him, then you'll do it for him.
ReplyDeletemy dear he's looking for a slave not a wife. wasn't it the weave that attracted him in the first place? marry him and be reduced to nothing. he'll still chase girls with weaves. mschewww
ReplyDeleteFuck him..who the hell does he tink he is... girlfriend 4get that jonk and move on..
ReplyDeleteAnd how more ultimatum is he gonna come up with? I serious dislike men with plenty irrelevant laws!.. Agree to dis one and another will emerge!.. Trade carefully!..#teamchris
ReplyDeleteIf you love eim obey first,let him propose and after the wedding you can try nd sort tinz out wif him na.u're a woman u shld knw hw u turn ur man nd get ur man
ReplyDeleteIf u can't live with den dnt accept cos u wan marry, besides since he can't comprise I dnt see why u still dey dere...u already answered urself anyway cos a guy lyk dat sounds like a control manipulative freak.
ReplyDeleteHmmmmmmmm...POTABLE VIV
ReplyDeleteDe best man u can get is de man dat luv u in ur natural beauty, u need to stop dos thing.
ReplyDeleteMa own is...if d guy really loves u, he ll accept u for wu u are.love aint meant to b conditional,he apparently hs bn deceivin u for d past 11mths so dunt start deceivin ursef nw cos marriage is a life tym fin..u cnt carry ur natural hair for a lyf tym I tink u shuld tel him dat.. Above all seek d face of God nd let him lead u...
ReplyDeleteMy dear in my honest opinion,relationship is al bout compromising nd lyin low 4 d oda@times wen u feel ure in luv wit dt person.so if u feel ure in luv wit him 2 d extent of compromisn ur weaves,den I feel its somtin uve 2 do dts if its d only tin he wants u 2 stop doin...linda I don't no y ur blog application has nt updated 4 2dys nw oh,pls try nd luk in2 it oh
ReplyDeletehe is nt a gud man. bluejenny78@gmail.com
ReplyDeleteDo not marry, hoo haa. Becos dese is just d beginning of his wahala to come, next one will be stop wearing makeup or trousers..
ReplyDeleteIf U love him and want to marry him then do as he wish unless you are nt ready for marriage
ReplyDeleteHmmmmm,u can do a lot wif ur natural hair n b beautiful. Get2ruky4luv@yahoo.com
ReplyDeleteI think its plain wrong for an adult to be given this sort of unnecessary ultimatums. Thats if the weaves arent tacky and loud. Isnt worn too long to become smelly and not unnaturaly long. I dont see why it shuld be an issue. Anyways.. if you can live with such dictatorial style.. goood, but that sort of attitude gets worse later.. creeping into other aspects of your relationship with him.
ReplyDeleteMaybe u carry it for too long and it smells and he doesn't know how to tell you. Tell him u can try but weaves are quite convenient. Instead of combing and creaming ur hair every day. BTW our weather doesn't favour out hair type. That's a flimsy reason. But I advice you carry ur weaves for a shorter amount of time and try using 8-10 inches of well sewn human hair, or better still use that human hair to fix pony tail. It will look natural. Try it. Good luck
ReplyDeleteIf he truly loves as he said he won't be bothered and lest I forget why didn't he chyke does ladies that doesn't wear weaves abeg free am joor,he should take you for who you are and not try to bend you to his own rules.Nobody can be changed except they want to
ReplyDeleteLinda!!!! Abeg post my comment o
Dis one na gobe. Are u sure there are no more rules and regulations? Dats wot u hv to find out first before he tells u he doesn't like a woman who breathes.
ReplyDeleteHe can't marry a woman dt wears weaves??then why in the first place did he ask a woman that wears weaves out?? Hehehe#cheEZyjayne
ReplyDeleteYour reasons for being scared are very meaningful but then you said you want to marry him, i guess you cant eat your cake and have it. I'm a guy, I dont agree with him bossing you in this manner, tell him to meet meet you half way, reduce how often you wear the wigs. Dont know if he is cared of buying them for the rest of his life or if they just look ugly, whatever the case may be he should meet you half way.
ReplyDeleteKeep your weave and push him away, since you love your weave...you can get married to your weave. Ode!
ReplyDeleteJst 4get d weaves. Get married to him and call it a day. Ok?
ReplyDeleteLadidi
Not a big deal afterall it's not looking gud on u so....? Let go nd settle down
ReplyDeleteUrsulasdiary@yahoo.com
Then what is there..stop it..there are other hair style.. Many be it doesn't fits u
ReplyDelete.
Is Nigeria truly independent @ 54 ** find out Jaybeesblog.Com
#BringBackJonathan2015
There is nothing wrong with being natural gf, try it out...if u like it stick with it...if u don't den start hunting for a new man...goodluck with that
ReplyDelete-what goes around comes around-
Rubbish! If he loves u, he shud love everything abt u and not try to change u. He is not the one, look elsewhr unless u ar so desperate to marry. My opinion
ReplyDeleteYou must not give in. He's a selfish and unreasonable man. How does your looking great in weaves affect his life? You will probably get married and he would ask you to stop taking care of your nails or something silly like that! And this is the type of man that would go out there and be having affairs with chics in the same weaves he doesn't want you on! Sister please ditch his sorry ass if he can't look beyond weaves to see what a great person you are.
ReplyDeleteHmmmm ok ooooo , is the writing the on the wall clear enough?
ReplyDeleteThink..... its not yet illegal to do so
Zubby said so
girls n too much weaves sef...cnt u braide or something?remove d weaves n marry him jooor..rememba that men are scarce dis daez.
ReplyDeleteQuestion for the gods
ReplyDeleteyou better agreed to what he said
ReplyDeleteBe determined u fool
ReplyDeleteGet rid of your wigs and keep your man hun! Weaves won't keep you warm at night when you're single, depressed and over the hill.
ReplyDeleteIt's a simple request, he wants the real you. It won't be easy especially if your hair is tough to manage, but haven't you heard? #TEAMNATURAL is the way forward, so just do it. Why should the thought of wearing the hair God gave you be so horrifying??
Kudos to him for speaking out against artificial women. If more men did it maybe more women will be natural and happy. #TeamNaturalAbeg
Kimmy*****
Hmmm.in dis century,well I don't know about you.but me I know I can't. Let him go and look for another girl to marry.natural hair ke.does he know the stress to carry natural hair alone.my dear think twice oh. Cos the next thing is ur make -up trousers and many more. Hisssssssd
ReplyDeleteBe naturally, dats d probs we are having wit u ladies, finger,toes,eyes,hair,bottom,breast...even face...everytin fake,try 2 appriciate some tinz in ur body
ReplyDeleteTry to make him understand why you can't stop wearing weaves, if it is his church doctrine or sumtin else..but my own opinion of a man like dis is a No No..dt's 2 harsh of him..
ReplyDeleteyou better agreed to what he said
ReplyDeleteMy advice is u please him 1st as a woman u have 2b obedient to ur man wen eve 1st exit she doesn't nw wah is called weaves.wiff time u wil change his mind buh listen 2him 1st
ReplyDeleteAllow him to turn you into mgbeke, all in the name of I WAN MARRY YOU.............
ReplyDeleteYou are not yet ready for marriage, if only you are ready,you will need no advice before you remove them
ReplyDelete#########God punish devil####
Allow him to turn you into mgbeke, all in the name of I WAN MARRY YOU.............
ReplyDeleteIf he wanted no weave he shld v gone to mfm or deeper to pick wife nao.... He saw wt weave b4 comin to ask u out. Mschewwww
ReplyDeleteI love weave!!!!!!!!! That man is a joker.
ReplyDeletecome on dear,u have said it all,and believe me it wont just stop at weaves..a man should love you for who you truly are and always respects your feelings,and decissions.he should respect you as well..i hate it when people impose conditions on others when it comes to love..love is unconditonal..dont be surprised..he mite be digging in on other girls with weaves..
ReplyDeleteHe doesn't ave any excuse..
ReplyDeleteListen 2 urself sister. U sound so vain n selfish. If u truly love him u'll do as he ask. Wats d fuss about d weaves? Are bald? * Jasmine*
ReplyDeleteWashy!!! U re in a long tin. Excuses.......
ReplyDeleteYou're right: you love your weaves and he's too controlling. Dump him.
ReplyDeleteHe's right too: weaves are ridiculous. I wouldn't marry a person who always had a rug pinned to her head.
He shouldn't have wasted your time. You shouldn't waste any more of your time. Happy independence day.
Time wey him see u,u carry natural hair?Madam no worry urself dat guy never serious.I bet u if u obey dis one,more ultimatum are still coming from now till una two old die...................................ALIWAHAB
ReplyDeleteTell him you accept on one condition, that he starts braiding his hair and start applying make up. oh yes!! my dear he wants to get rid of you knowing you will not accept. mtcheew
ReplyDeleteIf u ♡ him,den Marry him...shikina
ReplyDeleteAbeg didn't he see u with weave d day he wooed u? Let him waka pass. The man who will love u for who u are and what u represent will come ur way. Don't lose sleep pls. U will even love d new man more.
ReplyDeleteDear U said u love him;u can do anything for Love
ReplyDeleteDo u blame him? Smelly weaves and females always hitting their heads trying to scratch weaves.
ReplyDeleteWTF!!! He is not serious, what has weaves or wigs got to do with making a marriage successful. He doesn't love you because that's a silly excuse for me because even if you don't use weaves or wigs that doesn't still guaranty you marriage with him #onelovefromSnow#
ReplyDeleteTbh i don't think i can NEVER wife a lady that wears weaves. I can manage make-ups but weaves?.. Hell no. I can mess around with them, but to put a ring on it? Nah. NEVER!! #JustBeingHORNest#HappyIndependenceDay#
ReplyDelete~BADOO OF COVENTRY
think of your last statement...as a vice versa kinda thing
ReplyDeleteif you insist on still wearing your weave, you would become "that man" who is adamant on having his way.
if you actually love him, but he doesn't like unnatural hair.. and that's his proposal, then you have to choose between your wigs and your man
Just imagine he is unemployed and not searching for work..you would likely tell him to get a job before he can marry you right?
now that is you trying to change him..and may seem to him as you are tryna "have your way"
Dnt mind him,didnt he see you with weaves before?mine tld me not to use makeups at all,i was forced to comply cos i love him,after 5yrs now,he had dumped me cos i wasnt attractive anymore,now am with a guy who even gives me money to buy makeups and cosmetics.Make the wise decisions,he might nt want you to look attractive to other men,if he also cannot respect your opinion then u'll av to mayb reconsider it.
ReplyDelete