Dear LIB readers: I'm supoosed to marry in Oct. but another woman is pregnant for my man
From a female LIB reader
I have fixed my wedding for October here in the UK but I just found out that another lady is pregnant for my fiance back home in Nigeria. She's six months pregnant, due to give birth in October, same month I am getting married. To say that I am devastated is putting it mildly. I am so hurt that I've shut myself from the outside world. I am now so confused as to what to do. He has been begging me since I found out not to cancel the wedding. The pregnant lady actually contacted me via Facebook to tell me she's having my man's baby and when I confronted him, he didn't deny it. I have been with this man for three and a half years and all my family and friends have contributed one way or another to this wedding. The invitations haven't gone out yet, but all our people know the wedding is for October. I am so confused. Should I cancel the wedding? My female friends are telling me not to but surprisingly, my mum wants me to. What should I do?
This is not an issue dear , love sees beyond issues like this , if you really want to be with him then you should stick with him dear ..him having a child with another woman is just a factor that you can conquer
Some men r useless. U can go ahead n marry him n render the other woman a baby mama...it obvious she wanna trap him with pregnancy or just cancel it n save urself d babymama wahala.
Firstly thank ur God for this revelation..this is divorce b4 marriage, marriage is an institution ordained by God.its painful but its obivious he isnt your soulmate.its better to be disgraced nw than in 5years down d line to discover he has plenty baby mamas. Good luck.
My dear you deserve better than a cheat for a husband. You should be grateful to God you found out before its too late. Let him go and marry the lady pregnant for him.
Maybe you gotta let things be on hold for a while, then you and him can use this period to define things and all, define the other woman's place too, and if during this period you feel he is not worth all the trouble, then you can throw in the towel.
First its too bad he did what he did. but it seems to me the girl wants you to end the marraige plans since she could not get him to do it. she can't possibly be contacting you from the goodness of her heart. it all boils down to if you love him. what if you were married before you found out, will u divorce him?
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You can't trust a man to be faithful to u especially where distance speaks. If he's not intending to marry the lady in Q. and he wants u, go ahead and marry man except if u do not love him. But if its me sha, i'll forget him.
First, do u still love him? Will u ever trust him again? Can u live with the fact that he got another woman pregnant while dating u? Can u forgive him? Think about these questions and let the answer tell u what to do. Pray for God's guidance.
You can't trust a man to be faithful to u especially where distance speaks. If he's not intending to marry the lady in Q. and he wants u, go ahead and marry. Ur man except if u do not love him. But if its me sha o, i'll forget him.
You should listen to your mum n cancel the wedding. A man who can't appreciate 3 n half yrs given to him...... u can't be dealing with another woman with child just as you are starting your home. Pls, totally listen to your mum, she's so right.
I personally don't think LIBers are the right people to give you sound advice on this. I think you should pray to God about it and ask Him to guide your heart to the right decisions. The question you should ask yourself is, On what grounds did he get the lady pregnant? Is he in love with her? Does he really want to have a life with you? Are you willing to forgive him? etc. Those are the things you should be asking, just to mention a few . So you need God. Not LIBers on this one.
I don't know if you should cancel the wedding, but I think the two of you including family members need to seat down and talk, talk about moving forward, talk about what's best for you both, for the unborn baby and the pregnant woman, and also does the woman in question wants to settle down with your man, or just give birth and walk away? That should also be a major factor to consider when trashing out issue
If you love him, you can go ahead and marry him. Since he is not married to her. If he loves her enough, he would have married her and leave you. Please forgive him and continue with the wedding
Please my Dear cancel,don't toy with fire, once the baby is born,his attention is going to shift on the baby and not u anymore this guy is playing you maybe he wants something from you and once he gets it,he would divorce you and go back to his babymama,don't be a victim. Broken relationship is better than broken marriage. Brace up yourself!
Hmmmm don't marry him in October oooo. The relationship and eventual marriage can be salvaged but not if you validate what he did by marrying him now. That will give him the go ahead to do worse after marriage.
I suggest you cancel the wedding for now. Tell him he has to prove himself to you. No more sex. Couples counseling either in church or by a professional to get to the root of why he had sex with someone else, without condom too!!. If he cannot abide by your conditions then you have your answer, move on!. If he truly loves you from his heart he will do all you ask. Fix it now or you are setting yourself up for a world of pain. And you know what people will say to you- you knew what he was like, why did u marry him.
This is crazy. For him to have kept it away from you shows he still has intention of continuing whatever with that woman. I am a man but I must say this... WALK AWAY or you'd live your entire life fighting another woman. The man won't be better once the wedding is done.
Better you found out now that after the wedding. that would have been worse.
So sorry for what u re going thru. Bt if I were to be in ur shoes ,I ll cancel d wedding. I knw it hurts now but u will heal with time. Its better u knew abt it now before u got married to him
my dear don't cancel the wedding as long as your man is not getting married to her.she is just your man baby mama.beside who knows what God will do with the baby humm. Abeg next!
My dear, I'll advice you have a heart talk with him, be sure he has nothing with d babymama anymore,know your chances with him and he has to put it in written that she won't be a threat to u and ur future children, plus she'll keep her distance.. A Lawyer and some fam members shud be sitted to witness this..u welcome
my dear,please i beg u cancel with immediate effect. he will still cheat on u no matter what #Jeez how can he even sleep with the other woman without using protection..my dear its written clearly and boldly he's not ur man..God will give u a better person
Does your man truly love u? What's his relationship with the girl? Does he love the girl more than u? Questions like these are what u need to ask him and with his response u can know the next step. I wish I had known his occupation before dishing out my own quota of advice. But listen to dat deep voice inside ur heart and u will definitely know wat to do. I'm out ***CATCH ME IF U CAN***
Babe,please leave that man and cancel that marriage. I hate it when men cheat.Its very painful. I just left my bf who I wasted my time having a blind date with for almost a year because of his infidelity. I know God who sees my beautiful heart will heal my broken heart. Men,if you do not know the meaning of the word "Love" do not use it.
And to all the side chicks that scatter beautiful God given relationships, your day of reckony is near!
The spirit has revealed this to you! Pick and run. It is difficult but a decision must be made and you have the choice of postponing the wedding till you are certain. Don't say the vows half-hearted!
Please stop the wedding if you can but ultimately the decision is yours.I hate when a man cannot control his sexual urge.If he is unfaithful when you are not married,he won't be when you are married and its not about the distance,he is just an undisciplined man.
My dear, this is so sad. Please listen to your mum and cancel this wedding. Your female friends are speaking from that mentality of " marriage is by fire by force". I'm really happy your mum wants you to cancel it. You can not start your life with such a man.
I know some people don't mind marrying a man with a child, so if you don't mind a man with a child my advice is cancel the wedding for now take your time and see how the whole thing plays out, by next year you would know if you want to be with him or not. Do not marry him with this drama on ground.
If you are the kind of girl that can't marry a man with a child then cancel the wedding and end the r/ship straight away.
Call the wedding off, for your own good. If uve been dating for over 3years and he still impregnated another woman secretly, it means he might even av a child u know nothing of. What if the lady didn't contact you? The lady would given birth to a baby for your hubby without him telling.
follow ur heart. are u ready to live / spend forever with a cheat? are u ready for when he places his child first before u? are u ready for his baby mama's drama? he might be marrying u just to sve face. if it was me i will follow my mum's advive! cuz you deserve better!!!! forever is a very long time to spend with a cheating scumbag!!!!
Save yourself the stress and cancel the wedding,and thank God you found out on time b4 walking down the aisle with the useless he-goat.God will give you another man who'll love and respect you.Will remember you in my prayers
My family want u bt my broda fuckup bt d true is I will like u to cancel d wedding for future purposes I want him to regret his actn sincerely for wot he has done.Bt I will alwys b us Hammydamsel
'...Forgive as the Lord forgave you.' Colossians 3:13 NIV
A lady writes: 'I found my husband with another woman. Although he begged me for forgiveness, I wanted my pound of flesh, so I filed for divorce even though our kids asked me not to. Two years later my husband was still trying to get me back, but I wanted none of it. He'd hurt me and I wanted revenge. Finally he gave up, married a young widow with two children, and rebuilt his life without me. They're all so happy and I'm just a lonely, miserable woman, who let bitterness ruin her life.' Now there's no question that infidelity is wrong. But without forgiveness, what's left? There's a point at which anger stops being a healthy emotion and becomes a driving force. Like a drug, you need larger and larger doses. Once that happens, you move even further from forgiveness, because without anger you've no energy at all. It's what drives hate groups and extremists. Without bitterness they've no reason to exist. If you take bigotry from the racist, revenge from the zealot and chauvinism from the sexist, what's left? 'Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.' Bitterness is fatal; it kills your soul. So how can you stop yourself from becoming bitter when you've been hurt? (a) By looking into the face of the person who hurt you and seeing, instead, the face of the One who showed you mercy when nobody else would have given you another chance. (b) By realising that before the day, the week, the month or the year is out, you'll be needing mercy yourself.
SoulFood: 1 Sam 18:1-20:29, Lk 3:15-38, Ps 102:12-17, Prov 17:7-10
My sister, please CANCEL it o, you don't need the baggage that comes with such scenarios! Except you are ready to enter marriage with a battle-ground mindset. For me  better I hold my peace. He's not worth it abeg, don't let him fool you with all that begging. Άήδ please LISTEN to your mum, her advice is like that of no-one! All the best, because in your heart you know what you should do. Don't even think what others will say, because when you are suffering in the marriage, they will still say you knew άήδ went ahead. Bottom line is people must talk, your happiness matters most!
I'm short of words dear lady. Any body can make such mistake, but if you love him & he loves you, go on & marry him. They say that true love cancel all wrongs. I wish you happy married life. #OTUoCHA
Babe run while you can, or do you want to scatter your life with baby mama issues? The friends encouraging you all want the glam and fun of attending your wedding, but will they be there to help you when the other lady's child is competing for your husbands attention? besides don't you think that if he cheated before he will cheat again? don't let a man use you oh! You better call off the wedding and count your losses.
Imagine a man you intend marrying having unprotected sex with another woman! Where is the love? Good thing you found out. Take your mum's advice, CANCEL IT. Otherwise you will be MISERABLE in the marriage.
I have a freind who was in the same exact situation last year. After all the begging the guy did, begged her and her family, even begged the church pastor sef, but he NEVER changed. They were only married for about 5months year before the girl started finding out of all his infidelities (even after the wedding). They are currently going through a divorce process. Dont marry a cheater thinking marriage would change him. Dont marry this man and cause ur family an embarrasement. Its better to leave now.
The question is, "will u b happy knowing dat a lady is pregnant and due 2 deliver ur man's baby on d same month of ur wedding"? I think d very thought will haunt u. My advice: let go of dis man and discontinue wd d wedding like ur mom thinks. Marriage isn't something u rush in2. This man was unfaithful 2 u while u both were dating, do u think he'd discontinue after u r both married?If u ask me, I think he is probably after ur money or wotever material things he's gaining from u, dat's why he asked u not 2 cancel d wedding. To avoid regrets pls cancel d wedding. A wonderful man will come4 u. Desperation has led many women in2 making mistakes in marriage and I tell u: unfaithfulness hurts more in marriage dan outside it. Think about this. God loves u.
Well, your mum is talking from experience but it's actually for you to decide.
Can you handle another woman having ur husbands first child?
He cant also shut this woman out of his life as they will still have to see from time to time.
Husbands are not easy to come by so i ll advise u to stay with ur disrespectful cheater of a husband. Staying with him will actually make him do it again. If you're independent, please leave.
Please darl, cancel it. If he can conceal such vital information(after spending three and half years with him) from u, there are much more that's hidden and am sure it's gonna shock u to your marrow.
A man who can cheat,can Aldo kill. Take it or leave it!! Make hay while the sun is still shinning and pls,listen to mum.
I wonder why some peoPle are not big fans of condoms,not even one heartbeats fear for Aids??? Anyway welcome to the 2face baby popping lane!!! Life is a give and take- u figure it out urself,u know him better dan ours judgemental asses... But a guy dt cheats on you with another woman without a condom and having a lovechild before ur marriage begins?? Haaa that's a thotroach ryt dere! #cheEzyjayne
So sorry about that babe. I think u should ask urself deep down if u can deal with this situation and cope with all the difficulties it would present. U are indeed lucky the lady contacted u, as it gives u d the chance to know before hand. This matter lies in ur decision. Pls don't take it lightly. Talk to God and search ur heart well babe, then use ur head, pls. Cheers. Wish u all d best
Cancel the wedding. Simple. There's no sugarcoating dis ish.....this makes for a shaky foundation n strting a marriage out like dis is a big mistake. Cancel the wedding first, talk and work out issues. If @ d end u still wanna marry him, go ahead. U wud hv had tym to be angry n forgive without the "compulsions" being married.
The fact that another woman is having a child for him is not so much the issue as that you did not hear it from him and earlier too.
If a person can keep something like that away from you, can you entrust your life to that person?
....yet, the ability to forgive is a great virtue.
If you can live forever with him bearing in mind what has kept you 2 together thus far without this indiscretion of his remaining a shadow on your life, go for it dear. The decision is YOURS, not mummy, sister, friend or foe.
Vats rubbish... Wat or fiance did was absolutely rubbish nd nonsense he is xo ungrateful..... Men at xo wicked... Its beta 2 follow ur mind my advice is 4 u 2 cancel d weeding... Cs if u marry vat man u wld suffa more even vat pregnant woman wnt give u rest of mind.....
listen to your mum. Leave d cheat. You really dont want anoda woman and child in your marriage. bcos u will deal with it all ur life as long as u guys are together. plus as nigerians, ur kids wont av a say over his estate in future if something happens bcos they wont be first child. im married, talking from experience.
All I can say is sorry but I hope it's not your past that have come back to hunt you, pls check well sha . You know this karma thing can be funny atimes
My dear, if u think u love him enough to forgive his betrayal and accept the child, if he's the one that makes u happy, then by all means go ahead with ur wedding but don't forget to set some boundaries.what are The chances that if u leave him and marry another that the new guy won't cheat on u???
Men ar xo wicked...wah or fiance did was absolutely rubbish.... He dsnt appreciate u...its beta u follow ur mind...my advice 4 u is 2 cancel vat wedding wif vat traitor... Cs if u marry him he wld do smfin worse nd vat pregnant woman wld Neva give u rest of mind...wickd man its looking like he planned et vat vat oda woman wld give birth d same month wif or marriage
Men ar xo wicked...wah or fiance did was absolutely rubbish.... He dsnt appreciate u...its beta u follow ur mind...my advice 4 u is 2 cancel vat wedding wif vat traitor... Cs if u marry him he wld do smfin worse nd vat pregnant woman wld Neva give u rest of mind...wickd man its looking like he planned et vat vat oda woman wld give birth d same month wif or marriage
Men ar xo wicked...wah or fiance did was absolutely rubbish.... He dsnt appreciate u...its beta u follow ur mind...my advice 4 u is 2 cancel vat wedding wif vat traitor... Cs if u marry him he wld do smfin worse nd vat pregnant woman wld Neva give u rest of mind...wickd man its looking like he planned et vat vat oda woman wld give birth d same month wif or marriage
Honey, please don't. Forgive him but please please do not tie the knot. He is not worth it. He wants to save his own face. Meanwhile if you had made the same mistake, he would have told the whole world.
My dear, if I were in your shoes, I would cancel the wedding. He cheated on you once, WITHOUT CONDOM he may do it again. Life is too short to go through it, feeling hurt and betrayed, you deserve better. Girls be wise o, the very moment you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for.
Its a tough one no doubt.iust follow your heart. Thats careless of the man. One dont have to marry cos of pregnancy especially when they dont have much in common. www.gentletee.blogspot.com
He can actually cheat on ur again after d wedding, secondly u won't trust him ever even wen u get married to him. My dear he is not the last man on earth. Dnt feel desperate rather pray to God for a better man who will love, respect and honour as his friend and wife.
He can actually cheat on ur again after d wedding, secondly u won't trust him ever even wen u get married to him. My dear he is not the last man on earth. Dnt feel desperate rather pray to God for a better man who will love, respect and honour as his friend and wife.
He can actually cheat on ur again after d wedding, secondly u won't trust him ever even wen u get married to him. My dear he is not the last man on earth. Dnt feel desperate rather pray to God for a better man who will love, respect and honour as his friend and wife.
Y should u cancelled d wedding? I say no to dat. Men r meant to cheat, If u cancelled dis wedding n got marry to some1 else later in d future If u find out ur husband impregnate his Girlfd will u quit ur marriage for d girlfrd to comes in to ur matrimony home? My advice, go on with d wedding
I don't understand some people oo.. this one na question? What are u confused about. Ur nigga ain't loyal enuf to use a condom on his stupid dick and ur still asking if u should cancel the wedding. He doesn't even have respect for u. Fuck him. And u are foolish and dumb
Your female friends are telling u not to because they want to eat rice and dance...your mum is the one person in the world who has your best interest at heart...listen to her...goood thing is that u haven't sent out the invitations yet...wouldn't cost u much to repay those who contributed but getting into a marriage where u have seem warning signs about your spouse is very bad!!! U will be miserable....do it now!!! No need to save face..your friends cannot heal your broken heart..they can only console u
u better run for your life, its better that u are knowing before u enter. u don't test the depth of a river with both feet. polygamy is a no go area except u are ready to deal with other women sharing ur man and meaning that he will also share d responsibility of care and love with a second family. be wise babe. a better man will come. @yenmmy
Hmmmmm! It depends on u oh,if u kan bear it ks som men no dy play wit der children oh.if ur husbnd kan hv strong hrt n luv jst lyk 2face n if u kan b lyk Annie Idibia,den no prblm,go on wit d weddng. It hurts ma dear,may b dt gal wnts 2 hold hm wit dt pregnancy,bt ur hubby 2b made a mistake 2 hv impregnantd ha. Weddng temptatn. Mayb u listen 2 ur mum,ks she z wiser dan u n 1. Eiya! Sorry oh
What are u waiting for? Abeg cancel the wedding, that's not the end of the world! Go to God in Prayer in this turbulent time of ur life; he's definitely not ur man!
my dear... cancel the wedding immediately..!!! or at the very least postpone it. Even if u r going to marry him eventually, u should 1st take out time to clear your mind and reason things out properly...
my dear wt r u waitin for, u want 2 share ur man wit another woman sorry z ur name. Rember marriage z 4 better 4 worst. Pls don put urself in a problem u cannot carry. Be wise cus a stiches is time save nine.
NNE YOU ARE NOT CONFUSED ,YOU ARE CONSIDERING YOUR INVESTMENT.HOWEVER IF I WERE YOU I WILL RUN....RUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN AS FAST AS YOUR LEGGS CAN CARRY YOU.IF YOUR ON INSTANGRAM LOOK FOR HEATHERLOVE.SHE WILL HELP YOU OUT OF THIS ,YOU CAN USE HER BLOG TO HEAL ,BUT PLS RUN.ITS NOT WORTH IT ANSWERING MRS FOR ANSWERING SAKE .GOD BLESS YOU AS YOU MAKE THE RIGHT DESCISION.BECOS THE FOUNDATION OF EVERYTHING IS KEY TO ITS SUCCESS.GOD BLESS YOU
Go on wit the wedding if u love him but if wat u feel is not real love I beg u flee..coz u will need a lot of love for both of u to live togeda 4 d rest of ur life.#EA
Follow your heart, we can't decide for you what to do! It's your life you know? My opinion is leave his a**, but I would turn around and give him a chance, but watch him closely, he has cheated once and might cheat again!
You need not be confused, he cheated without considering you, your feelings, and the upcoming wedding. Forgive him now, and you will have to nurse a heartbreak for the rest of your life.
My sister dat man is ur man,u av to accept it lyk dat and d baby don't get me wrong nt the woman nd if the woman dey prove strong head dat she must marry ur man abeg fight for ur man with pray because a prayerless life is a powerless life...wish you GOODLUCK
My dear, I feel your pain. Some men are really really without conscience.
So if not that the stupid side chick contacted and informed you via facebook, he wouldn't have told you? really?.
But the things women do to fellow women! this silly side chick definitely knew he has a girlfriend before getting pregnant for him. She did it to tie him to her obviously.
Questions to ask yourself: 1. Do you know if he is marrying you for documents? If you suspect that's his intention, then don't marry him otherwise after he gets what he is after, he would run back to Nigeria and bring the silly girl over to the UK. 2. If you are 100% certain he is not after your documents and he genuinely loves you, then forgive him. It is VERY hard though. So, if you go ahead and marry him, the pain of his betrayal would remain. Can you deal? Am just pissed though that he cheated! How could he do that???? to someone he is dating for over 3years??? am sad, sad, sad. (I guess am sad because I had a similar experience. The betrayal is a deep pain. So I feel your pain. That he didn't just cheat, he did it without protection...with all the STDs flying around; is pathetic.
I would suggest you postpone the wedding to see how things go.
Be strong my sister. If you need someone to talk to, contact me. It is well. The Lord is your strength
Postpone indifinitely and work out the problem at hand. Counselling etc. Why get married with so much unresolved hurt. He kept it away from you for 6 months, that's the very shady and disrespectful.
Listen to your mother. She's the only one who will tell you the truth. You may be able to get over the betrayal and maybe even live with the child in your household but the month will always be a sore spot. A woman's wedding day is supposed to be the happiest day of her life and the day when she's most in love with her husband. If you marry him, especially in October, your wedding day might be tense and you'll likely be rather angry with him - makes for bad memories. Do yourself a favour. Either you don't marry him at all or you postpone the wedding until all these issues and developments have been settled and some decision/equilibrium have been reached.
Babe why do I have a feeling you're hesitating because of what people will say or think? This is marriage, you do not want to be miserable. Trust me. From the way you're sounding, your trust has been completely shattered. I think this was God's chance to give you a way out of a bad tomorrow. You should cancel the wedding. At this point, I think the dude is more interested about saving his face than he is about your hurt feelings
Dear confused woman, call off the wedding.your man cheated on you and I'm very sure its not the first time, its just that this time he got one of his gfs pregnant. Ask yourself this question, if you are the one pregnant for another man few months to your wedding or your fiance caught u with another man would he still marry you? Also your mother has told u to call off the wedding, pls listen to your mother.
If you do not cancel the wedding, you will only be saving your friends and family the embarrassment of finding out. However, you will likely suffer in silence for a very long time (years) in your life due to this decision. Not leaving out the fact that everyone will eventually find out what you are trying to hide. Simple advise, cancel it now and take time to heal and find someone who will not betray you like this or you have a great deal of complication coming your way.
Gal from one woman to.another..break it off and everything and.move.on..u cant start your marraige with a big baggage like that..God bless..A broken courtship is better than a broken.marraige.youve invested 3 years yeah its painful but u deserve better..God might just be saving u
Take a walk now before it's too late, wat would hv happened if u didn't find out? Like it or not, dat other lady and her baby will always be a part of ur hussy's life. #Mytwocent#
Did ur mum give u reasons why u should cancel d wedding? It's a big deal and if u know u can forgive him plz go ahead with d wedding but if not stay away but again how old are u? His time on ur side? Cos he might still hv others u did not know. D lady sharp Nigeria base girl contacted u so I can leave ur man for her. My dear use ur brain
Don't cancel it abeg, it may be out of mistake, u shud knw ur man and wat he is capable of doing, hav u been suspecting traces of such misconduct bfor this ocured, if yex, go ahead but if no, forgive him abeg
Cancel. Had the idiot come clean himself I would have said maybe not as he's sorry and has shown some remorse. That he let u find out the way u did??? Naa. That man has no loyalty towards you. And in that case u owe him none. Cancel.
Did ur mum give u reasons why u should cancel d wedding? It's a big deal and if u know u can forgive him plz go ahead with d wedding but if not stay away but again how old are u? His time on ur side? Cos he might still hv others u did not know. D lady sharp Nigeria base girl contacted u so I can leave ur man for her. My dear use ur brain
RUN 4 YOUR DEAR LIFE MY DEAR...IF HE TOLD YOU HIMSELF, THATS ANOTHER MATTER, YOU WOULDNT HAVE KNOWN IF THE BABYMAMA TO BE DIDNT CONTACT YOU. HE AINT LOYAL AT ALL...AND TRUST ME BABYMAMA AINT THE ONLY LADY HE SHAGGED. FOLLOW YOUR MUMS ADVICE, FORGET WHAT PEOPLE WILL THINK, EITHER THAT OR A HIGH PROBABILITY OF A SAD MARRIAGE. WHATEVER YOU DECIDE, I WISH YOU LUCK
Which kind of mumu female desperate friends do u move with? Leave him fast o...u won't be able to handle the effects of this his act! BTW, he'll likely do it again...RUN!!!
A guy getting a woman pregnant is one thing and loving d woman enough to marry her is another thing.getting preggy for a guy does not guarantee marriage.pls marry your man after all he is not married to d woman he got preggy yet,she is just a desperate lady looking for a man to tie down wit pregnancy.since he begged you not to cancel d wedding dat means he value you more than his baby mama so pls be wise and allow ur wedding to push through period.
Honestly the decision is in ur hand, cos no matter what anybody tells u, u have to do what's best for u, so pls ask yourself first can I forgive him, can I cope with a stepchild for the rest of my life, do I love him, his he worth the pain etc frm dere I believe u shld find ur answer so sorry abt ur situation.
Hello girlfriend, sorry for that disappointment. All I wanna drop here is simple. 1) speak to God in prayers, a times God just allow things to happen to us to know how strong our faith is for him. He will instruct you on what to do is if you are a devoted one, because the prayer of a sinner is like a trash before him...2) you know your mom, you know if she is a Good one or not. If you really values her advise, if she never deceives or lie to you, go ahead and cancel the weeding. Your mother will not deceive you if she is truly a caring or loving mom because she is in marriage so she knows what is involve....3) you truly knows what you want no one else knows, so listen to yourself. I bet she will talk to you....my dear, life is too short to be unhappy....just beat your chest and say ALL IS WELL.....its well
Doro chill. The man loves you that is why he didn't deny it. Its not like is getting married to the other lady. You better grab your man and carry on with your wedding plans before it becomes too late.
My dear sister this could be the only time in this pre-marriage situation that you can let him go and be partly hurt for only a short time. If you marry him you would be totally hurt for a very long time. This question he would ask you is "since you knew why did you go ahead to marry me" Let him go he was not suppose to be your husband. Your true husband would be revealed once you cancel d wedding (a ceremony) and start praying in earnest for marriage (the life). I would not pity you if u go ahead. This is my humble opinion, if in doubt ask God and do exactly as He says. He probably was trying to play some away matches before settling with you, na God expose am. Do not throw away His clear revelation to u. You may never get another chance for a good marriage life.
If He can keep this secret for U all this while until u found out urself he will do more terrible things to u when u marry him. Pls call the wedding off. The dude is not ur husband. Austyn.
Pls pls n pls cancel d wedding cos if u don't u are giving him d key to cheat on u after marriage. He will end up being d new 2baba pregnanting all d girls on d street.
My dear cancel, marriage won't change such a man so unless your are comfortable being the main chick amongst baby mamas you better leave. If your fiance is African and that baby is a boy just know that the baby mama now owns him.
You dodged the bullet girl. You should go to church and give a testimony for this one. it doesn't take a rocket scientist. And if u do marry him, know that you have lost all your respect and he's forever going to treat you like shit cos u put up with what any lady with class wouldn't .
Go ahead with your wedding my dear. The next man might not be better. Men will always be men. You can't throw 3 and half years away because of another woman.
babe,u better cancel that wedding.unless you want to be having serious marital issues after marriage.he is not worth it.there wont be trust anymore.come and marry me please.harberdy@gmail.com
Is really painful but I will advice you to cancel it because been a second wife or still hving a mate is not good in marriage, just let go and I hope a nice man will come for u despite that no man is nice but ur fiance is not ur right husband don't allow him to deceive u in order to wed u nah, never accept him I kw is not easy but let go.
My dear its only just started ! If he was sleeping around while you were arranging wedding what's the worth ?? Starting a union with doubts and fear of more cheating episodes not worth it !! Forget the 3 yrs + ,it wasn't real anyway ,that child is for life hes always gonna be there n the lady will always be the 1st but again depends on you and your heart what you can take n cant ! If na me na run i go run ,ccollext whatever refund you can and go on a well deserved holiday .effurun gal
This is not an issue dear , love sees beyond issues like this , if you really want to be with him then you should stick with him dear ..him having a child with another woman is just a factor that you can conquer
ReplyDeleteSome men r useless. U can go ahead n marry him n render the other woman a baby mama...it obvious she wanna trap him with pregnancy or just cancel it n save urself d babymama wahala.
ReplyDeleteJust hold your man,
ReplyDeleteMICKY: #jaw droppin#i tnk I'm as confused as this lady right now#foldin ma arms to waitin for libers views
ReplyDeleteFirstly thank ur God for this revelation..this is divorce b4 marriage, marriage is an institution ordained by God.its painful but its obivious he isnt your soulmate.its better to be disgraced nw than in 5years down d line to discover he has plenty baby mamas. Good luck.
ReplyDeleteMy dear you deserve better than a cheat for a husband.
ReplyDeleteYou should be grateful to God you found out before its too late.
Let him go and marry the lady pregnant for him.
~BONARIO~says so via NOKIA LUMIA
Pray to God over it. Ask him to give you a sign. If he is your man, then am sure the wedding will take place. My candid advice..!!
ReplyDeleteTalk to God, he will put you through
ReplyDeleteMaybe you gotta let things be on hold for a while, then you and him can use this period to define things and all, define the other woman's place too, and if during this period you feel he is not worth all the trouble, then you can throw in the towel.
ReplyDeleteFirst its too bad he did what he did. but it seems to me the girl wants you to end the marraige plans since she could not get him to do it. she can't possibly be contacting you from the goodness of her heart. it all boils down to if you love him. what if you were married before you found out, will u divorce him?
ReplyDeleteHmmm ur case is a very hard nut to crack......May God reveal to u how to handle dis issue. Pray over it that's all I can give.
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ReplyDeleteYou can't trust a man to be faithful to u especially where distance speaks. If he's not intending to marry the lady in Q. and he wants u, go ahead and marry man except if u do not love him. But if its me sha, i'll forget him.
ReplyDeleteThis is kinda tasking; physically, emotionally and otherwise. I think you should heed to your moms advise. But if you must continue with him, you two need to come to a compromise.
ReplyDeleteBasically, for me, I would advise you do away from this man. A cheating fiancé/fiancée is a cheating hubby/.... You know what I mean?!
David (dave_gino)
Walk away...ur mum cant deceive you.
ReplyDeleteFirst, do u still love him? Will u ever trust him again? Can u live with the fact that he got another woman pregnant while dating u? Can u forgive him? Think about these questions and let the answer tell u what to do. Pray for God's guidance.
ReplyDeleteYou can't trust a man to be faithful to u especially where distance speaks. If he's not intending to marry the lady in Q. and he wants u, go ahead and marry. Ur man except if u do not love him. But if its me sha o, i'll forget him.
ReplyDeletedon't do that, don't go ahead with it
ReplyDeleteIt's a pity.Go ahead with d wedding.
ReplyDeleteListen to ur mum
ReplyDeleteYou should listen to your mum n cancel the wedding. A man who can't appreciate 3 n half yrs given to him...... u can't be dealing with another woman with child just as you are starting your home. Pls, totally listen to your mum, she's so right.
ReplyDeleteI personally don't think LIBers are the right people to give you sound advice on this. I think you should pray to God about it and ask Him to guide your heart to the right decisions. The question you should ask yourself is, On what grounds did he get the lady pregnant? Is he in love with her? Does he really want to have a life with you? Are you willing to forgive him? etc. Those are the things you should be asking, just to mention a few . So you need God. Not LIBers on this one.
ReplyDeleteUo dnt hv to cancel ur wedding. Get married n let d other woman be d 2nd wife. LIB Princess! Pretex4luv@yahoo.com
ReplyDeleteI don't know if you should cancel the wedding, but I think the two of you including family members need to seat down and talk, talk about moving forward, talk about what's best for you both, for the unborn baby and the pregnant woman, and also does the woman in question wants to settle down with your man, or just give birth and walk away? That should also be a major factor to consider when trashing out issue
ReplyDeleteYour comment will be visible after approval
If you love him, you can go ahead and marry him. Since he is not married to her. If he loves her enough, he would have married her and leave you. Please forgive him and continue with the wedding
ReplyDeleteI sympathise with you on the bad-good news.it's not too late to call off the wedding.walk out before it's too late.
ReplyDeletePlease my Dear cancel,don't toy with fire, once the baby is born,his attention is going to shift on the baby and not u anymore this guy is playing you maybe he wants something from you and once he gets it,he would divorce you and go back to his babymama,don't be a victim. Broken relationship is better than broken marriage. Brace up yourself!
ReplyDeleteHmmmm don't marry him in October oooo. The relationship and eventual marriage can be salvaged but not if you validate what he did by marrying him now. That will give him the go ahead to do worse after marriage.
ReplyDeleteI suggest you cancel the wedding for now. Tell him he has to prove himself to you. No more sex. Couples counseling either in church or by a professional to get to the root of why he had sex with someone else, without condom too!!. If he cannot abide by your conditions then you have your answer, move on!. If he truly loves you from his heart he will do all you ask. Fix it now or you are setting yourself up for a world of pain. And you know what people will say to you- you knew what he was like, why did u marry him.
This is crazy. For him to have kept it away from you shows he still has intention of continuing whatever with that woman.
ReplyDeleteI am a man but I must say this... WALK AWAY or you'd live your entire life fighting another woman. The man won't be better once the wedding is done.
Better you found out now that after the wedding. that would have been worse.
----Unbiased mind---D
Are u seriously asking if you should cancel the wedding?? No go on with it my dear, and get the shocker of ur life next....
ReplyDeleteSo sorry for what u re going thru. Bt if I were to be in ur shoes ,I ll cancel d wedding. I knw it hurts now but u will heal with time. Its better u knew abt it now before u got married to him
ReplyDeletemy dear don't cancel the wedding as long as your man is not getting married to her.she is just your man baby mama.beside who knows what God will do with the baby humm. Abeg next!
ReplyDeleteA broken engagement is better than a broken marriage. Call off the wedding ASAP.
ReplyDeleteMy dear, I'll advice you have a heart talk with him, be sure he has nothing with d babymama anymore,know your chances with him and he has to put it in written that she won't be a threat to u and ur future children, plus she'll keep her distance.. A Lawyer and some fam members shud be sitted to witness this..u welcome
ReplyDeleteIt will b better to cancel d wedding cos as for me am nt ready to b a second wife
ReplyDeletemy dear,please i beg u cancel with immediate effect. he will still cheat on u no matter what #Jeez how can he even sleep with the other woman without using protection..my dear its written clearly and boldly he's not ur man..God will give u a better person
ReplyDeleteDoes your man truly love u? What's his relationship with the girl? Does he love the girl more than u? Questions like these are what u need to ask him and with his response u can know the next step. I wish I had known his occupation before dishing out my own quota of advice. But listen to dat deep voice inside ur heart and u will definitely know wat to do. I'm out ***CATCH ME IF U CAN***
ReplyDeleteBabe,please leave that man and cancel that marriage.
ReplyDeleteI hate it when men cheat.Its very painful.
I just left my bf who I wasted my time having a blind date with for almost a year because of his infidelity. I know God who sees my beautiful heart will heal my broken heart.
Men,if you do not know the meaning of the word "Love" do not use it.
And to all the side chicks that scatter beautiful God given relationships, your day of reckony is near!
The spirit has revealed this to you! Pick and run. It is difficult but a decision must be made and you have the choice of postponing the wedding till you are certain. Don't say the vows half-hearted!
ReplyDeletePlease stop the wedding if you can but ultimately the decision is yours.I hate when a man cannot control his sexual urge.If he is unfaithful when you are not married,he won't be when you are married and its not about the distance,he is just an undisciplined man.
ReplyDeleteMy dear, this is so sad. Please listen to your mum and cancel this wedding. Your female friends are speaking from that mentality of " marriage is by fire by force". I'm really happy your mum wants you to cancel it. You can not start your life with such a man.
ReplyDeleteI know some people don't mind marrying a man with a child, so if you don't mind a man with a child my advice is cancel the wedding for now take your time and see how the whole thing plays out, by next year you would know if you want to be with him or not. Do not marry him with this drama on ground.
If you are the kind of girl that can't marry a man with a child then cancel the wedding and end the r/ship straight away.
God bless you and guide you through it all.
Go on with the wedding, that will be a good indication of maturity. And you will have his full respect. Don't be discouraged, you wont be the first!
ReplyDeleteCall the wedding off, for your own good.
ReplyDeleteIf uve been dating for over 3years and he still impregnated another woman secretly, it means he might even av a child u know nothing of.
What if the lady didn't contact you? The lady would given birth to a baby for your hubby without him telling.
Better to be single than marry a cheater.
Listen to your mum. A rat will always be a rat.
ReplyDeletefollow ur heart. are u ready to live / spend forever with a cheat? are u ready for when he places his child first before u? are u ready for his baby mama's drama? he might be marrying u just to sve face. if it was me i will follow my mum's advive! cuz you deserve better!!!! forever is a very long time to spend with a cheating scumbag!!!!
ReplyDeletedear get married dnt even tink of quiting
ReplyDeleteListen to your mum. A rat will always be a rat.
ReplyDeleteSave yourself the stress and cancel the wedding,and thank God you found out on time b4 walking down the aisle with the useless he-goat.God will give you another man who'll love and respect you.Will remember you in my prayers
ReplyDeletetalk with him very well b4 any decision..knw his plans................................#KingOfKings
ReplyDeleteMy family want u bt my broda fuckup bt d true is I will like u to cancel d wedding for future purposes I want him to regret his actn sincerely for wot he has done.Bt I will alwys b us
ReplyDeleteHammydamsel
This might help!
ReplyDeleteSunday, August 3 2014
Forgive, for Your Own Sake!
'...Forgive as the Lord forgave you.' Colossians 3:13 NIV
A lady writes: 'I found my husband with another woman. Although he begged me for forgiveness, I wanted my pound of flesh, so I filed for divorce even though our kids asked me not to. Two years later my husband was still trying to get me back, but I wanted none of it. He'd hurt me and I wanted revenge. Finally he gave up, married a young widow with two children, and rebuilt his life without me. They're all so happy and I'm just a lonely, miserable woman, who let bitterness ruin her life.' Now there's no question that infidelity is wrong. But without forgiveness, what's left? There's a point at which anger stops being a healthy emotion and becomes a driving force. Like a drug, you need larger and larger doses. Once that happens, you move even further from forgiveness, because without anger you've no energy at all. It's what drives hate groups and extremists. Without bitterness they've no reason to exist. If you take bigotry from the racist, revenge from the zealot and chauvinism from the sexist, what's left? 'Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.' Bitterness is fatal; it kills your soul. So how can you stop yourself from becoming bitter when you've been hurt? (a) By looking into the face of the person who hurt you and seeing, instead, the face of the One who showed you mercy when nobody else would have given you another chance. (b) By realising that before the day, the week, the month or the year is out, you'll be needing mercy yourself.
SoulFood: 1 Sam 18:1-20:29, Lk 3:15-38, Ps 102:12-17, Prov 17:7-10
Have a Blessed Sunday :)
This is a tough one. Pray on it!
ReplyDeletePreety difficult to handle emotionally! Well pray nd seek direction 4rm d holy spirit.
ReplyDeleteMy sister, please CANCEL it o, you don't need the baggage that comes with such scenarios! Except you are ready to enter marriage with a battle-ground mindset. For me  better I hold my peace. He's not worth it abeg, don't let him fool you with all that begging. Άήδ please LISTEN to your mum, her advice is like that of no-one! All the best, because in your heart you know what you should do. Don't even think what others will say, because when you are suffering in the marriage, they will still say you knew άήδ went ahead. Bottom line is people must talk, your happiness matters most!
ReplyDeleteOh sorry wo honey,,anything we tell wound'nt heip, u know your better so follow ur heart
ReplyDeleteI'm short of words dear lady. Any body can make such mistake, but if you love him & he loves you, go on & marry him. They say that true love cancel all wrongs. I wish you happy married life. #OTUoCHA
ReplyDeleteWhat A Story. Anyways, All Need Ƴǒǘ Do Is To Pray 4 God's Directions. (Linda's Man)
ReplyDeleteHonestly, best thing is to really pray about it. God will clarify it for you
ReplyDeleteBabe run while you can, or do you want to scatter your life with baby mama issues? The friends encouraging you all want the glam and fun of attending your wedding, but will they be there to help you when the other lady's child is competing for your husbands attention? besides don't you think that if he cheated before he will cheat again? don't let a man use you oh! You better call off the wedding and count your losses.
ReplyDeleteCancel that wedding! You'll be glad you did in the future.
ReplyDeleteDunno wah 2 say buh don't marry him yet wait till afta d childs birth
ReplyDeleteListen to your mother
ReplyDeleteImagine a man you intend marrying having unprotected sex with another woman!
ReplyDeleteWhere is the love? Good thing you found out.
Take your mum's advice, CANCEL IT. Otherwise you will be MISERABLE in the marriage.
Just follow ur heart
ReplyDeleteI have a freind who was in the same exact situation last year. After all the begging the guy did, begged her and her family, even begged the church pastor sef, but he NEVER changed. They were only married for about 5months year before the girl started finding out of all his infidelities (even after the wedding). They are currently going through a divorce process. Dont marry a cheater thinking marriage would change him. Dont marry this man and cause ur family an embarrasement. Its better to leave now.
ReplyDeleteAre you looking for a suger mummy or daddy please call dis line 09096552678 please be mature..
ReplyDeleteThe question is, "will u b happy knowing dat a lady is pregnant and due 2 deliver ur man's baby on d same month of ur wedding"? I think d very thought will haunt u. My advice: let go of dis man and discontinue wd d wedding like ur mom thinks. Marriage isn't something u rush in2. This man was unfaithful 2 u while u both were dating, do u think he'd discontinue after u r both married?If u ask me, I think he is probably after ur money or wotever material things he's gaining from u, dat's why he asked u not 2 cancel d wedding. To avoid regrets pls cancel d wedding. A wonderful man will come4 u. Desperation has led many women in2 making mistakes in marriage and I tell u: unfaithfulness hurts more in marriage dan outside it. Think about this. God loves u.
ReplyDeleteCancel it.
ReplyDeleteWell, your mum is talking from experience but it's actually for you to decide.
ReplyDeleteCan you handle another woman having ur husbands first child?
He cant also shut this woman out of his life as they will still have to see from time to time.
Husbands are not easy to come by so i ll advise u to stay with ur disrespectful cheater of a husband. Staying with him will actually make him do it again. If you're independent, please leave.
Biko nwanne what's the confusion here? DO NOT MARRY THIS MAN I TAKE GOD BEG YOU!!! You will never stop weeping! RUN MY SISTER RUNNNNN
ReplyDeleteThank God you knew now, Cancel the wedding and move on,be rest assured you will find someone better
ReplyDeleteHmmmmmmm. I tink you should cancel the wedding.
ReplyDeletePlease darl, cancel it. If he can conceal such vital information(after spending three and half years with him) from u, there are much more that's hidden and am sure it's gonna shock u to your marrow.
ReplyDeleteA man who can cheat,can Aldo kill. Take it or leave it!! Make hay while the sun is still shinning and pls,listen to mum.
See gobe! Find out if he intend to marry the girl,if yes,I advice you quit.
ReplyDeleteFACE OF LIB
I wonder why some peoPle are not big fans of condoms,not even one heartbeats fear for Aids??? Anyway welcome to the 2face baby popping lane!!! Life is a give and take- u figure it out urself,u know him better dan ours judgemental asses... But a guy dt cheats on you with another woman without a condom and having a lovechild before ur marriage begins?? Haaa that's a thotroach ryt dere! #cheEzyjayne
ReplyDeleteCancel the wedding to avoid problems in the future
ReplyDeleteSo sorry about that babe. I think u should ask urself deep down if u can deal with this situation and cope with all the difficulties it would present. U are indeed lucky the lady contacted u, as it gives u d the chance to know before hand. This matter lies in ur decision. Pls don't take it lightly. Talk to God and search ur heart well babe, then use ur head, pls. Cheers. Wish u all d best
ReplyDeleteCancel it,if u were d one pregnant for anoda man would he hv accepted u wit d pregnancy??
ReplyDeleteOmo see gobe...... Speech is silver,silence is gold...... Am out of here......... I AM MISS LIBER*MISS MEENAT
ReplyDeleteCancel the wedding. Simple. There's no sugarcoating dis ish.....this makes for a shaky foundation n strting a marriage out like dis is a big mistake. Cancel the wedding first, talk and work out issues. If @ d end u still wanna marry him, go ahead. U wud hv had tym to be angry n forgive without the "compulsions" being married.
ReplyDeleteDo you still love him? Can you look past his err and live the rest of your life with him?
ReplyDeleteOloriburuku ni awan okurin sha
ReplyDeleteCancel
ReplyDeleteThe fact that another woman is having a child for him is not so much the issue as that you did not hear it from him and earlier too.
ReplyDeleteIf a person can keep something like that away from you, can you entrust your life to that person?
....yet, the ability to forgive is a great virtue.
If you can live forever with him bearing in mind what has kept you 2 together thus far without this indiscretion of his remaining a shadow on your life, go for it dear.
The decision is YOURS, not mummy, sister, friend or foe.
Postpone the wedding and work things out.. If u re ok den fix a new date, if not then move on.
ReplyDeletePls don't cancel d wedding .
ReplyDeleteVats rubbish... Wat or fiance did was absolutely rubbish nd nonsense he is xo ungrateful..... Men at xo wicked... Its beta 2 follow ur mind my advice is 4 u 2 cancel d weeding... Cs if u marry vat man u wld suffa more even vat pregnant woman wnt give u rest of mind.....
ReplyDeleteHa!!! Who is this A. Makinde that just loves sleeping with married women??? One of them is watching you oh.
ReplyDeletelisten to your mum. Leave d cheat. You really dont want anoda woman and child in your marriage. bcos u will deal with it all ur life as long as u guys are together. plus as nigerians, ur kids wont av a say over his estate in future if something happens bcos they wont be first child. im married, talking from experience.
ReplyDeleteAll I can say is sorry but I hope it's not your past that have come back to hunt you, pls check well sha . You know this karma thing can be funny atimes
ReplyDeleteCancel it!
ReplyDeleteMy dear, if u think u love him enough to forgive his betrayal and accept the child, if he's the one that makes u happy, then by all means go ahead with ur wedding but don't forget to set some boundaries.what are The chances that if u leave him and marry another that the new guy won't cheat on u???
ReplyDeleteMen ar xo wicked...wah or fiance did was absolutely rubbish.... He dsnt appreciate u...its beta u follow ur mind...my advice 4 u is 2 cancel vat wedding wif vat traitor... Cs if u marry him he wld do smfin worse nd vat pregnant woman wld Neva give u rest of mind...wickd man its looking like he planned et vat vat oda woman wld give birth d same month wif or marriage
ReplyDeleteMen ar xo wicked...wah or fiance did was absolutely rubbish.... He dsnt appreciate u...its beta u follow ur mind...my advice 4 u is 2 cancel vat wedding wif vat traitor... Cs if u marry him he wld do smfin worse nd vat pregnant woman wld Neva give u rest of mind...wickd man its looking like he planned et vat vat oda woman wld give birth d same month wif or marriage
ReplyDeleteMen ar xo wicked...wah or fiance did was absolutely rubbish.... He dsnt appreciate u...its beta u follow ur mind...my advice 4 u is 2 cancel vat wedding wif vat traitor... Cs if u marry him he wld do smfin worse nd vat pregnant woman wld Neva give u rest of mind...wickd man its looking like he planned et vat vat oda woman wld give birth d same month wif or marriage
ReplyDeleteHoney, please don't. Forgive him but please please do not tie the knot. He is not worth it. He wants to save his own face. Meanwhile if you had made the same mistake, he would have told the whole world.
ReplyDeleteMy dear, if I were in your shoes, I would cancel the wedding.
ReplyDeleteHe cheated on you once, WITHOUT CONDOM he may do it again. Life is too short to go through it, feeling hurt and betrayed, you deserve better.
Girls be wise o, the very moment you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for.
Its a tough one no doubt.iust follow your heart. Thats careless of the man. One dont have to marry cos of pregnancy especially when they dont have much in common. www.gentletee.blogspot.com
ReplyDeleteDnt marry him oooo....wat if d oda lady didnt contact u? He wudda kept it a secret.. galfrnd,ur nigga's a cheat
ReplyDeletea.k.a EDWIN CHINEDU AZUBUKO said...
ReplyDelete.
Seriously i dont nw what yu should do....
.
.
***CURRENTLY IN JUPITER***
I don't know what to say to you. But, think very well before you make any decision.
ReplyDeleteSo sorry about what happened
My candid advice is that you cancel the wedding....It will lead to complications in the future...
ReplyDeletelisten to ur mum n forget wat ur friends says
ReplyDeleteMy dear,cancel or postpone d wedding. U shouldn't get married now,i would advice u give urself time to think things tru b4 taking any decision.
ReplyDeleteSo?? Never heard of step mum?
ReplyDeletefollow ur hrt darling.#THAT AKWA IBOM BOY#
ReplyDeleteThis is really very sad , I really feel for you and advice that you pray to God for the right decision and the right direction.
ReplyDeleteMy dear run for your life.
ReplyDeleteDump his cheating ass. Although you can borrow a few wisdom from “Annie” and marry him. Anyways, the choice is yours.
ReplyDeleteMy dear is not too late ,if you know you can't deal with it better cancel it ohhhh to avoid had I known in future. CHI.
ReplyDeleteGirl...... U are the one in the marriage and not your. Family members and friends.....
ReplyDeleteIt u on the marriage and not ur family member and friends
ReplyDeleteYou just have to move on and still get married to him, if you really love him #bright bravo#
ReplyDeleteHe can actually cheat on ur again after d wedding, secondly u won't trust him ever even wen u get married to him. My dear he is not the last man on earth. Dnt feel desperate rather pray to God for a better man who will love, respect and honour as his friend and wife.
ReplyDeleteHe can actually cheat on ur again after d wedding, secondly u won't trust him ever even wen u get married to him. My dear he is not the last man on earth. Dnt feel desperate rather pray to God for a better man who will love, respect and honour as his friend and wife.
ReplyDeleteHe can actually cheat on ur again after d wedding, secondly u won't trust him ever even wen u get married to him. My dear he is not the last man on earth. Dnt feel desperate rather pray to God for a better man who will love, respect and honour as his friend and wife.
ReplyDeletedumb question from a dumb liber!
ReplyDeleteGo ahead and marry him oo & tomorrow u will come here to lib to tell us ur not happy wit ur marriage.
mtchewwww... Pig!
ReplyDeleteY should u cancelled d wedding? I say no to dat. Men r meant to cheat, If u cancelled dis wedding n got marry to some1 else later in d future If u find out ur husband impregnate his Girlfd will u quit ur marriage for d girlfrd to comes in to ur matrimony home? My advice, go on with d wedding
ReplyDeleteI don't understand some people oo.. this one na question? What are u confused about. Ur nigga ain't loyal enuf to use a condom on his stupid dick and ur still asking if u should cancel the wedding. He doesn't even have respect for u. Fuck him. And u are foolish and dumb
ReplyDeleteYour female friends are telling u not to because they want to eat rice and dance...your mum is the one person in the world who has your best interest at heart...listen to her...goood thing is that u haven't sent out the invitations yet...wouldn't cost u much to repay those who contributed but getting into a marriage where u have seem warning signs about your spouse is very bad!!! U will be miserable....do it now!!! No need to save face..your friends cannot heal your broken heart..they can only console u
ReplyDeleteu better run for your life, its better that u are knowing before u enter. u don't test the depth of a river with both feet. polygamy is a no go area except u are ready to deal with other women sharing ur man and meaning that he will also share d responsibility of care and love with a second family. be wise babe. a better man will come. @yenmmy
ReplyDeleteCancel it asap
ReplyDeleteIf u really love him, jus stick to him.. A man can love and still cheat on you..
ReplyDeleteHmmmmm! It depends on u oh,if u kan bear it ks som men no dy play wit der children oh.if ur husbnd kan hv strong hrt n luv jst lyk 2face n if u kan b lyk Annie Idibia,den no prblm,go on wit d weddng. It hurts ma dear,may b dt gal wnts 2 hold hm wit dt pregnancy,bt ur hubby 2b made a mistake 2 hv impregnantd ha. Weddng temptatn. Mayb u listen 2 ur mum,ks she z wiser dan u n 1. Eiya! Sorry oh
ReplyDeleteWhat are u waiting for? Abeg cancel the wedding, that's not the end of the world! Go to God in Prayer in this turbulent time of ur life; he's definitely not ur man!
ReplyDeletePls cancel...dat guy is wicked dat means hz been cheating on u
ReplyDeletePls visit my shoe blog
www.glowysofiscated.blogspot.com
If during those years u've always felt he's the right man for you. #God forgives
ReplyDeleteBut. Whatever decision you make, it must not be a temporary cure.
my dear... cancel the wedding immediately..!!! or at the very least postpone it. Even if u r going to marry him eventually, u should 1st take out time to clear your mind and reason things out properly...
ReplyDeleteCancel d weddn one tin u dnt wnt to have is a polygmous family itz nt a gud tin u can still meet anoday guy since invitations hav nt been sent out.
ReplyDeletemy dear wt r u waitin for, u want 2 share ur man wit another woman sorry z ur name. Rember marriage z 4 better 4 worst. Pls don put urself in a problem u cannot carry. Be wise cus a stiches is time save nine.
ReplyDeleteFollow Your Mom's decision. You will regret it at d end if you don't. that man is not for you. Don't go into polygamous family. Shukran
ReplyDeleteFollow Your Mom's decision. dont go into polygamous home. you will regret it at d end. He's not your man.
ReplyDeleteHmmmnnn... hmmmnnn... hmmmmnnn...
ReplyDeleteNNE YOU ARE NOT CONFUSED ,YOU ARE CONSIDERING YOUR INVESTMENT.HOWEVER IF I WERE YOU I WILL RUN....RUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN AS FAST AS YOUR LEGGS CAN CARRY YOU.IF YOUR ON INSTANGRAM LOOK FOR HEATHERLOVE.SHE WILL HELP YOU OUT OF THIS ,YOU CAN USE HER BLOG TO HEAL ,BUT PLS RUN.ITS NOT WORTH IT ANSWERING MRS FOR ANSWERING SAKE .GOD BLESS YOU AS YOU MAKE THE RIGHT DESCISION.BECOS THE FOUNDATION OF EVERYTHING IS KEY TO ITS SUCCESS.GOD BLESS YOU
ReplyDeleteGo on wit the wedding if u love him but if wat u feel is not real love I beg u flee..coz u will need a lot of love for both of u to live togeda 4 d rest of ur life.#EA
ReplyDeleteAre you more concerned about 'a wedding' or 'a happy married life' ?
ReplyDeleteFollow your heart, we can't decide for you what to do! It's your life you know? My opinion is leave his a**, but I would turn around and give him a chance, but watch him closely, he has cheated once and might cheat again!
ReplyDeletemy dear,are u ready for baby mama wahala,better cancel d wedding for now and think about it well.
ReplyDeleteYou need not be confused, he cheated without considering you, your feelings, and the upcoming wedding. Forgive him now, and you will have to nurse a heartbreak for the rest of your life.
ReplyDeleteWhat does your gut tell you to do
ReplyDeleteMy sister dat man is ur man,u av to accept it lyk dat and d baby don't get me wrong nt the woman nd if the woman dey prove strong head dat she must marry ur man abeg fight for ur man with pray because a prayerless life is a powerless life...wish you GOODLUCK
ReplyDeleteMy dear, I feel your pain. Some men are really really without conscience.
ReplyDeleteSo if not that the stupid side chick contacted and informed you via facebook, he wouldn't have told you? really?.
But the things women do to fellow women! this silly side chick definitely knew he has a girlfriend before getting pregnant for him. She did it to tie him to her obviously.
Questions to ask yourself: 1. Do you know if he is marrying you for documents? If you suspect that's his intention, then don't marry him otherwise after he gets what he is after, he would run back to Nigeria and bring the silly girl over to the UK.
2. If you are 100% certain he is not after your documents and he genuinely loves you, then forgive him. It is VERY hard though. So, if you go ahead and marry him, the pain of his betrayal would remain. Can you deal? Am just pissed though that he cheated! How could he do that???? to someone he is dating for over 3years??? am sad, sad, sad. (I guess am sad because I had a similar experience. The betrayal is a deep pain. So I feel your pain. That he didn't just cheat, he did it without protection...with all the STDs flying around; is pathetic.
I would suggest you postpone the wedding to see how things go.
Be strong my sister. If you need someone to talk to, contact me. It is well. The Lord is your strength
Grace.
Cancel d wedding....a cheat willl alwz be a cheat!!
ReplyDeletePostpone indifinitely and work out the problem at hand. Counselling etc. Why get married with so much unresolved hurt. He kept it away from you for 6 months, that's the very shady and disrespectful.
ReplyDeleteListen to your mother. She's the only one who will tell you the truth. You may be able to get over the betrayal and maybe even live with the child in your household but the month will always be a sore spot. A woman's wedding day is supposed to be the happiest day of her life and the day when she's most in love with her husband. If you marry him, especially in October, your wedding day might be tense and you'll likely be rather angry with him - makes for bad memories. Do yourself a favour. Either you don't marry him at all or you postpone the wedding until all these issues and developments have been settled and some decision/equilibrium have been reached.
ReplyDeleteStop the wedding ASAP trust me you don't want to be married to him.
ReplyDeleteBabe why do I have a feeling you're hesitating because of what people will say or think? This is marriage, you do not want to be miserable. Trust me. From the way you're sounding, your trust has been completely shattered. I think this was God's chance to give you a way out of a bad tomorrow. You should cancel the wedding. At this point, I think the dude is more interested about saving his face than he is about your hurt feelings
ReplyDeleteCancel d wedding....a cheat willl alwz be a cheat!!
ReplyDeleteDear confused woman, call off the wedding.your man cheated on you and I'm very sure its not the first time, its just that this time he got one of his gfs pregnant. Ask yourself this question, if you are the one pregnant for another man few months to your wedding or your fiance caught u with another man would he still marry you? Also your mother has told u to call off the wedding, pls listen to your mother.
ReplyDeleteIf you do not cancel the wedding, you will only be saving your friends and family the embarrassment of finding out. However, you will likely suffer in silence for a very long time (years) in your life due to this decision. Not leaving out the fact that everyone will eventually find out what you are trying to hide. Simple advise, cancel it now and take time to heal and find someone who will not betray you like this or you have a great deal of complication coming your way.
ReplyDeleteGal from one woman to.another..break it off and everything and.move.on..u cant start your marraige with a big baggage like that..God bless..A broken courtship is better than a broken.marraige.youve invested 3 years yeah its painful but u deserve better..God might just be saving u
ReplyDeleteDen drop him like he is hot
ReplyDeleteDen drop him like he is hot
ReplyDeleteCancel it. Thank God you haven't tied the knot yet. If he can do this to you before the wedding, imagine what he'll do in the marriage. Take it easy.
ReplyDeletefollow ur hrt ad pray for God direction
ReplyDeletePls, go ahead with the wedding, this is a cross u must carry, men are dogs. I'm sorry you have to go through this.
ReplyDeletePls, go ahead with the wedding, this is a cross u must carry, men are dogs. I'm sorry you have to go through this.
ReplyDeleteTake a walk now before it's too late, wat would hv happened if u didn't find out? Like it or not, dat other lady and her baby will always be a part of ur hussy's life. #Mytwocent#
ReplyDeletePark your bag and leave him.
ReplyDeleteDid ur mum give u reasons why u should cancel d wedding? It's a big deal and if u know u can forgive him plz go ahead with d wedding but if not stay away but again how old are u? His time on ur side? Cos he might still hv others u did not know. D lady sharp Nigeria base girl contacted u so I can leave ur man for her. My dear use ur brain
ReplyDeletewait ohhhhh...
ReplyDeleteif you had gotten pregnant for another man will he still get married to you.
this is a big red flag girl, take your mother's advice and cancel please.
thankGod you found out now, when was he planning to tell you.
forgive him and move on please.
dont go into your marriage with baggage.
best of luck.
Don't cancel it abeg, it may be out of mistake, u shud knw ur man and wat he is capable of doing, hav u been suspecting traces of such misconduct bfor this ocured, if yex, go ahead but if no, forgive him abeg
ReplyDeleteCancel. Had the idiot come clean himself I would have said maybe not as he's sorry and has shown some remorse. That he let u find out the way u did??? Naa. That man has no loyalty towards you. And in that case u owe him none. Cancel.
ReplyDeleteDid ur mum give u reasons why u should cancel d wedding? It's a big deal and if u know u can forgive him plz go ahead with d wedding but if not stay away but again how old are u? His time on ur side? Cos he might still hv others u did not know. D lady sharp Nigeria base girl contacted u so I can leave ur man for her. My dear use ur brain
ReplyDeleteFirst of all.i hope you are a good women for your husband to be so loosed and not minding his commitments with ya?
ReplyDeleteFirst of all.i hope you are a good women for your husband to be so loosed and not minding his commitments with ya?
ReplyDeletegeez! please cancel the wedding. go with ur mom on this!
ReplyDeleteSwt pliss dnt,just b strong.
ReplyDeleteRUN 4 YOUR DEAR LIFE MY DEAR...IF HE TOLD YOU HIMSELF, THATS ANOTHER MATTER, YOU WOULDNT HAVE KNOWN IF THE BABYMAMA TO BE DIDNT CONTACT YOU. HE AINT LOYAL AT ALL...AND TRUST ME BABYMAMA AINT THE ONLY LADY HE SHAGGED. FOLLOW YOUR MUMS ADVICE, FORGET WHAT PEOPLE WILL THINK, EITHER THAT OR A HIGH PROBABILITY OF A SAD MARRIAGE. WHATEVER YOU DECIDE, I WISH YOU LUCK
ReplyDeleteI will cancel the whole thing if I'm in your shoes...; unless you are also pregnant, then, that will be very complicated..
ReplyDelete* My R1.50c comment *
Which kind of mumu female desperate friends do u move with? Leave him fast o...u won't be able to handle the effects of this his act! BTW, he'll likely do it again...RUN!!!
ReplyDeleteA guy getting a woman pregnant is one thing and loving d woman enough to marry her is another thing.getting preggy for a guy does not guarantee marriage.pls marry your man after all he is not married to d woman he got preggy yet,she is just a desperate lady looking for a man to tie down wit pregnancy.since he begged you not to cancel d wedding dat means he value you more than his baby mama so pls be wise and allow ur wedding to push through period.
ReplyDeleteHonestly the decision is in ur hand, cos no matter what anybody tells u, u have to do what's best for u, so pls ask yourself first can I forgive him, can I cope with a stepchild for the rest of my life, do I love him, his he worth the pain etc frm dere I believe u shld find ur answer so sorry abt ur situation.
ReplyDeleteit happen to me i move wit my life i did not marry him i knw of u D ball is in curt
ReplyDeleteHello girlfriend, sorry for that disappointment. All I wanna drop here is simple. 1) speak to God in prayers, a times God just allow things to happen to us to know how strong our faith is for him. He will instruct you on what to do is if you are a devoted one, because the prayer of a sinner is like a trash before him...2) you know your mom, you know if she is a Good one or not. If you really values her advise, if she never deceives or lie to you, go ahead and cancel the weeding. Your mother will not deceive you if she is truly a caring or loving mom because she is in marriage so she knows what is involve....3) you truly knows what you want no one else knows, so listen to yourself. I bet she will talk to you....my dear, life is too short to be unhappy....just beat your chest and say ALL IS WELL.....its well
ReplyDeleteDoro chill. The man loves you that is why he didn't deny it. Its not like is getting married to the other lady. You better grab your man and carry on with your wedding plans before it becomes too late.
ReplyDeleteMy dear sister this could be the only time in this pre-marriage situation that you can let him go and be partly hurt for only a short time. If you marry him you would be totally hurt for a very long time. This question he would ask you is "since you knew why did you go ahead to marry me" Let him go he was not suppose to be your husband. Your true husband would be revealed once you cancel d wedding (a ceremony) and start praying in earnest for marriage (the life). I would not pity you if u go ahead. This is my humble opinion, if in doubt ask God and do exactly as He says. He probably was trying to play some away matches before settling with you, na God expose am. Do not throw away His clear revelation to u. You may never get another chance for a good marriage life.
ReplyDeleteIf He can keep this secret for U all this while until u found out urself he will do more terrible things to u when u marry him. Pls call the wedding off. The dude is not ur husband. Austyn.
ReplyDeleteU can still go ahead buh just be ready to live with a knife in your heart for a long time
ReplyDeletePls pls n pls cancel d wedding cos if u don't u are giving him d key to cheat on u after marriage. He will end up being d new 2baba pregnanting all d girls on d street.
ReplyDeleteMy dear cancel, marriage won't change such a man so unless your are comfortable being the main chick amongst baby mamas you better leave. If your fiance is African and that baby is a boy just know that the baby mama now owns him.
ReplyDeleteAsk Gabriel union for advice, 2 of una dey same category
ReplyDeleteMy dear cancel dat wedding ur own man will surely com 4 u...mayb dats how God want to deliver u frm his evil mind
ReplyDeleteDnt cancel d wedding if u really love ur man, shit happens go on wit ur preparation and love ur man d more
ReplyDeleteUrsulasdiary@yahoo.com
I will suggest that she shouldn't go ahead with it.
ReplyDeleteI will suggest that she shouldn't go ahead with it.
ReplyDeletebroken engagement is better than a broken marriage
ReplyDeletewhy did he have to wait for the lady to tell you before he admitted it.
listen to your mum
broken engagement is better than a broken marriage
ReplyDeletewhy did he have to wait for the lady to tell you before he admitted it.
listen to your mum
Obey your mum madam, if u know what is good for you
ReplyDeleteU ALONE CAN ADVISE URSELF DEAR....... THINK DEEP ND MAKE A DECISION
ReplyDeleteYou dodged the bullet girl. You should go to church and give a testimony for this one. it doesn't take a rocket scientist. And if u do marry him, know that you have lost all your respect and he's forever going to treat you like shit cos u put up with what any lady with class wouldn't .
ReplyDeleteGo ahead with your wedding my dear. The next man might not be better. Men will always be men. You can't throw 3 and half years away because of another woman.
ReplyDeletebabe,u better cancel that wedding.unless you want to be having serious marital issues after marriage.he is not worth it.there wont be trust anymore.come and marry me please.harberdy@gmail.com
ReplyDeleteBabim the good Lord has shown u a clear way out...please take it and run
ReplyDeleteMy dear go ahead and marry him if what u feel for him is truly love@mercy
ReplyDeleteIs really painful but I will advice you to cancel it because been a second wife or still hving a mate is not good in marriage, just let go and I hope a nice man will come for u despite that no man is nice but ur fiance is not ur right husband don't allow him to deceive u in order to wed u nah, never accept him I kw is not easy but let go.
ReplyDeleteMy dear its only just started ! If he was sleeping around while you were arranging wedding what's the worth ?? Starting a union with doubts and fear of more cheating episodes not worth it !! Forget the 3 yrs + ,it wasn't real anyway ,that child is for life hes always gonna be there n the lady will always be the 1st but again depends on you and your heart what you can take n cant ! If na me na run i go run ,ccollext whatever refund you can and go on a well deserved holiday .effurun gal
ReplyDeleteDear leave him , a broken relationship is better dan a broken marriage
ReplyDelete