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Friday 14 December 2012

Dear LIB readers: Should I tell my sister?


From a LIB reader
During my wild days in the university nine years ago I had a brief fling with a guy I met through a friend. We had sex a few times and saw each other for about a month before we lost touch.
Fast forward eight years later; my immediate younger sister introduced this same guy to me as her boyfriend. I was hoping they would break up so he wouldn't be an issue between my sister and I but that didn't happen. A year later, they are getting married. Their wedding is actually this Saturday December 15th. There's serious friction between the guy and I as we can't even look at each other or talk directly to each other. I've been avoiding him since he hooked up with my sister but now that they are about to be married, I'm stuck. Should I tell my sister what happened between us or leave things the way they are? Does she have a right to know? I'm confused. Pls help!!!

372 comments:

  1. You should have said something earlier!

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  2. That na matter for the grave i beg.. as long as una two no talk anything from the beginning then no need to destroy an entire family .....

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  3. My dear that's in the past let it be in the past.

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  4. mumu@shegoat.org......u should've said something the very first time she introduced him as her boyfriend...u still have to tell her although it might cause a lot of tension but she still has to know...this is something u and her future husband can't keep for the rest of y'alls life

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  5. The answer is very simple and u know dat.
    No don't tell her,coz u stand to gain nothing from doing so,and its not going to help their union in anyway. And I advice u don't vist dem frequently,before u come asking a more complicated question,just leave it at dis. FILE BE !

    ~BONARIO~says so via NOKIA3310

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  6. Linda watsup with this new background? Its so childish. Ur sisters fiance shld have told her long time ago it makes me wonder if the guy in question is really trustworthy.

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  7. She does have a right to know but you should have told her from jump!!!!!

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  8. First of all-the guy is keeping things from his fiancee which is bad enough.secondly-you shouldn't have waited this long before thinking about mentioning ur previous affair with this guy to your sis.you should have mentioned it to your the moment she told you they were friends.you owe your sis the truth,other wise things would never be the same btw you both.

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  9. Well, you would have told her the 1st time she introduced him to you, since you didn't then its best you tell her now, because if you don't somehow and sometime in her marriage, the gist would spill out and she might not find it funny then. Tell her asap.

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  10. This is a tough one. You should have told her before things got this serious, cos how can u be telling someone getting married tomorrow that u've slept with her husband-to-be before. The best thing is to keep quiet for now, let her enjoy her day.

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  11. Well, it goes two ways. The truth will set you free from every manner of 'blackmail' and secrecy but then it was nothing but a fling, somehow, i think she has no right to know. What one doesn't know never hurts. She doesn't need to know all the pudding you have tasted...
    http://theglamfile.blogspot.com

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  13. It's just a thing of the mind, there is no need telling your sister, cos it wouldnt change anything since they really love each other. On your own part, try all you can stay away from the guy cos your sister may never forgive you any if you dare tamper with her marriage. He is now in your past, forget him and move on.

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  14. if u continue keeping d truth in ur mouth it would end up choking you,
    its beta 2 cum out with d truth now cus sooner or l8a she wud still find out and it wud be bera if she hears it from you.

    **Shikena**

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  15. I think she deserves to know..whether or not this happened a while back.

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  16. Wow!!! serious issues. you should have said something sooner rather than avoid the situation and underestimating their relationship. people change. if the guy is changed, then let is slide but if you dont trust him say something. cos not saying could lead to something worse in the future (like him wanting to get down with you, just saying). a broken relationship/engagement is better than a broken marriage!!!!

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  17. Please keep quiet. That's your past. If you didn't tell your sister before now, then I think it's rather too late. You saw it coming, if you felt strongly about it, you should have told her when she brought him home to you a year ago. Just be happy for them or feign it.

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  18. Well,since you didn't tell your sis till it got to this point,then I think you have to keep this in you for life rather than spoil your sisters joy..A word is enof for the wise cos if you tell her now,trust me,she will hate you for life cos marriage or lemme say wedding alys means a lot to women..

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  19. Keep your idiotic mouth and pussy far away from the genuine love birds. You were an experiment in the hands of the guy period. If you say a word, I will buy your casket and attend your funeral. Idiot.

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  20. I totally think she should know

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  21. Tell her and break her heart? Except You still have fEelings for him? Abeg move on

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  22. Wonder whre d friction is comn frm aftrall it ws 9yrs ago,I doubt its important tell her if u want.linda wat hapnd 2our red background na.Anny

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  23. She ought to know and let her make her decision.

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  24. What is the problem with the guy marrying ur sister?
    1. Do you still like the guy?
    2.Or is he not good enough for your sister?

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  25. U should hv told her back then. Now ur stuck btw a rock & a hard place. You're damed if u do & ur damed if u don't. Ain't nuthin u can do. That ship has sailed. Do the right thing & tell her though. She'll hate u now but better than later.

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  26. you need to go on ur knees and beg for forgiveness FIRST bcoz u hav slept with a man..and d way u sound, looks like its nothing to u. Tell ur sister and let her undstand or u hold on to the guilt 4eva and that will nt be good. Regardless of how u luk at it...its still a Loose Loose case. so tell her and let it be between you two.

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  27. I don't want to judge you for what you did several years ago, but this shows the folly of flings with guys/gals you don't intend marrying.
    As it is now, the way to go is to tell your sister because I sense somewhere along the line in the future this ugly past with rear its head.

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  28. I don't want to judge you for what you did several years ago, but this shows the folly of flings with guys/gals you don't intend marrying.
    As it is now, the way to go is to tell your sister because I sense somewhere along the line in the future this ugly past with rear its head.

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  29. *Linda. Tell yor sister today.The 2 can make informed decisions. The guy will likely tell his wife in the future and you will be the bad person then.

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  30. Talk to your sister. and Dont involve the guy. Let ur sister be the one to tell her husband to be. That is what you should do. You will live with guilt forever. Nextt time learn to close ur legs..Ur younger sister is getn married and obviously u not yet married. u see wat spreading at a young age can cost u?..nonsense!

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  31. May God help You. That's all i Can say!

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  32. a Brief one...CLOSE UR DAMN LEGS NEXT TIME! Ur Junior sister don marry..u see ur self? mtchew..Linda next gist abeg

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  33. I don't want to judge your past. The way to go is to tell your sister because I see this ugly past rearing it's head in the future. And it could damage your relationship with your sister.
    And one more advice, don't give a thought to continuing any amorous relationship with the guy again.

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  34. You both should confess in church. ONLY the TRUTH shall set you free.

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  35. she has EVERY right to know..u r her BLOOD. which kain wicked sister u be sef? My frend will u common go and tell her wat hapnd btwn u two b4 i descend on u..
    Ewu hausa lik u!

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  36. Keep spreading ur legs okay? Talkn bout in ur "wild days"..how has dat helpd u now..and frm d story U are nt married..God will help u. U beta talk to ur sis. U will live with guilt for the rest of ur life!

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  37. SHAME ON YOU! U R A DISGRACE!

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  38. U r just an attention seeker..and i know who the writer is..If care is not taken i'll put her name here sef..make una see am 4 her facbuk..stupid gurl. and she is still busy spreading oh..SMH!

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  39. OH WOW! WHAT A SHAME

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  40. Pray to God to PLEASE forgive ur ways..u seem CRAZY!

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  41. She has d right to kno. Jst tell her,its not lyk u both had a baby 2geda.

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  42. Na wah o! Wild days in uni!!I coment my reseve btw what's d big deal? Are u still f**king him? Y u wan pour sand sand4another babe garri?the guy has obviously moved on....u sef move too(unless u have personal selfish issues).if u feel that bad,clear the air with him*i no say go f*** am o!!!

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  43. Just leave thing the way they are. You can walk up to the guy and bury the ashes. Be normal, it was a past live, you shouldnt allow it persist to the future.

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  44. It's better off knowing than her finding out later, because eventually she will find out one of these days. Why are you her sister? To protect your family from getting hurt. I think you shoud've told her from the start. You shoudnt have wait till now to tell her, but now that they are getting married you should still tell her as a sister which will jeopardize their relationship but she has the right know since they havent get marry yet, so she can make her decision.

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  45. Its either 2 things: 1. He may truly love ur sister n reali wants to marry her. 2. He may b marrying her just to spite u after wht u guys went tru wen u were dating him (depends on d circumstances of how u guys broke up). But my advice wil b tht u tell her but she may hate u for not telling her all this while. Even on d day she introduced him to u.fastforward today n u sudenly 'feel' d need to tell her cos dey r getting married? Hmmmmm. If u dnt tell her,she'll stil hate u wen she finds out from a 3rd party. Either way,she won't b happy.but tell her YOURSELF!!! Blood is thicker than water!

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  46. Dear silly sister pls don't do any thing stupid. You had your chance to tell her when your sis and the "fling" guy started dating which was the best time after all Whatever happened was 9 long years ago. How ever the guy should still tell his bride to be. And if he doesn't then God help your sister o... X0x0

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  47. Leave things the way the are. You dont need to tell your sister, it would hurt her irrespective of the fact that you did it in your 'wild days'. But what you gat to do is to bury the ashes with ur sistas hussy-to-be. Settle the grudge with him and let live tick as normal, afterall it all happened in ur past, why bring it to the future

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  48. You better tell your sister what happened Years back. If she should hear it From someone else, I seriously don't think she will ever trust you again

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  49. Leave things the way the are. You dont need to tell your sister, it would hurt her irrespective of the fact that you did it in your 'wild days'. But what you gat to do is to bury the ashes with ur sistas hussy-to-be. Settle the grudge with him and let live tick as normal, afterall it all happened in ur past, why bring it to the future

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  50. U should have told her the moment u knew they were dating... U waited too long.

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  51. She sure needs to tell her sister or live with lifetime regret. First to comment wink wink

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  52. Let it go, u had a fling not a baby, n its not that he's still into you, tellin her won't change anytin, it'll only create awkward moments, n she mite nt be comfortable wit u coming to her home

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  53. She had a right to know immediately she introduced the guy to guy to you. that's the purpose of introduction. the hidden facts behind intro-"this is the guy i am involved with, u seen him before? u know him? u know any shit bout him? is he good? does he look responsible? u think we good together?"
    these are the silent questions behind intro and gurl it was at that onset you ought to have told your sis about what you had with her guy. if you had done so then, she would have been in a better position to know if to continue with the relationship or put an end to it. Not now that her wedding is just tomorrow. c'mon! that would be devastating. let sleeping dogs lie. but in doing that u must start relating with the guy on a clean slate never mentioning the past anymore. ur relationship with him now is family/inlaw base, no monkey business or talk. get it? Maturity comes to play here. u both repsect your sis and her feelings and move on.

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  54. abeg..let d sleeping dog lies....eight years is such a long while u know....ait'nt u jealous??......hmmmmmmmm

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  55. Let ur past b past cos telling ur sister might hurt her feelings but I thot u and d guy parted amicably so y d friction now tricky situation though

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  56. you must be the biggest fool in the world, why didn't u tell her when they started dating, when it would have been easier to deal with. now u want to break up the marriage and put ur families to shame. ur biggest fear is that u know u might sleep with him again. so the guy slept with u and u sister. hmmmm...... ASJ

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  57. u are an idiot. why are u wasting our time here on LIB??? u didnt think u should tell her since or even when he proposed its now when the wedding is this saturday. my friend get lost. i wish i could tear u a slap. u are a real fool. u should have told her since so she could have made her decision. u are a very big fool.

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  58. Jus let it be that way and let it go as if it never happened,with time u will get over it.

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  59. Please tell your sister about it, I think it is important she knows. It happened in d past!! It will be worse if she finds out herself.

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  60. There is no right or wrong answer. Suck it up and tell your sister, better now than later. If you can't do it ask some that you both respect to tell her in your presence. You don't want it coming back to bite you in the ass after they are married. You should have told her right after you knew they were dating. So don't make it later.

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  61. Wot Ʊ shud av done is tell ђε̲̣̣я immediately Ʊ met d man. Buh snc Ʊ withheld ds long pls don't ruin ђε̲̣̣я happy day wt such a revelation. Ʊ're jst goin τ̲̅ȍ brk ђε̲̣̣я heart 4nothn. Let go of d issue and move on wt ur life

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  62. I think u should just let them be and leave the past behind u,because she might break down just act maturedly and let them be happy this is a very small world and shits happens

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  63. Please keep quiet.

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  64. Ny friend tell her jo! Sex does nt mean anytin ds days . Its nt a problem at all cos u did nt have a child with d guy. Also feel free to check ikonyiriuka.blogspot.com

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  65. u better tell her the truth..cos d angel u knw is beta dan d angel u dnt knw....

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  66. Pls kip ur mouth shut.. Dunt spoil a gud thg... If u thnk u nid 2 du any tlkn. Tlk 2d dude 2 kip hs mouth shut aswell... Lyk dey say ,nthg z hiddn under d sun, so y rush thgs,deyl evntuali knw,so pls let a beauriful wedn go un. Tammy

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  67. Keep ur mouth sealed.ok wots d need of telling ha?a whole 9yrs pls abeg shut up.

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  68. Yes. The truth will be revealed either ways. Now is the time. It won't end well if you don't stop it now

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  69. Well,that is your decision to make.But i'll say this,it depends on the kind of relationship you have with your sister,how close you are to her and it also depends on the kind of person she is,if she's the understanding type and if she's like a friend to you,i suggest you tell her...You actually didn't Sleep with your sister's husband,you only had a fling with a random guy who fortunately or unfortunately is about to be your brother in law 9years later. So i'd say,TELL HER.she should understand that was many years ago and that you guys feel nothing for eachother now,she should be able to trust you,well if she doesn't,she should trust her man then...She just needs to trust someone!

    PRETTY GIRL!

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  70. you gotta tell her before she finds out herself.....its now left for her to love the guy with his past or dump him cus of his past.....

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  71. What she doesn't know won't kill her.

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  72. Cal ur sister sit her down nd xplain †ђǝ situation Ơ̴̴̴̴̴̴͡f things to her I bet U̶̲̥̅̊ she will definitely understand pls †ђǝ earlier †ђǝ better.

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  73. speak now or forever hold thy peace!

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  74. Cal ur sister sit her down nd xplain †ђǝ situation Ơ̴̴̴̴̴̴͡f things to her I bet U̶̲̥̅̊ she will definitely understand pls †ђǝ earlier †ђǝ better.

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  75. Shit happens. Let sleeping dog dey as he dey... File bee

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  76. Thank God you said brief fling. Its obvious you want to ruin your sister's happiness . I'd advise you to shut your stupid mouth and stop being bitter cos there should be no correlation btw your fling 8 years ago and your sister's future . Your sis doesn't have a right to know ! Period

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  77. Pls just leave things the way they are, cos like u said it was just a fling. Don't spoil ur sister's happiness

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  78. Pls let them be don't spoil their happiness

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  79. Fool! You should have told her ever since. Saturday is tomorrow! Please just shutup and let the wedding hold. You guys had sex big deal your sis is happy now, leave her be!!!!!

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  80. Please keep your mouth shut forever!!!

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  81. I think you should tell her... She does have sa right to know cuz if u don't and she eventually finds out herself... She myt feel betrayed by u. I would feel that way tho... Buh uve waited for too long and it'll now be like why did u wait till now and stuff... Tell her tho, better late than never!

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  82. U did not tell her all this while they were dating and its now u see they are gonna get married u want to shatter her joy? If her husband to be did not tell her, na u wan do that?? Abeg no kill her joy. U can as well die with the secret mehn!!

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  83. NO! STFU and be happy for your sis as long as he is not asking u out! Let the past stay in d past.

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  84. There is no use bothering her newly to be wedded brain with that, what is really causing the friction between you and him in the first place? Don't tell me one of you still has feelings for the other, just clear things with this guy so you all can be cool, if it still doesn't work, call for a meeting between him, you and your sis and say it all, after it was 8 years ago.

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  85. s...s happens. Sweep it under d carpet, provided U̶̲̥̅̊ r not going back to him. Don't spOil ur sis joy wit ur past stupoidity o.

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  86. Don't tell her......i wudnt want to know such .....if u do tell her, u r bringing up room for suspicion forever..she wudnt even want to leave u two in a room...My dear if old things are really past and away...don't tell.

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  87. I think u shld but u shld know hw ur sis is.is she understanding?b carefl tho

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  88. No..don't tell your sister a thing because right now, it makes no difference and your sister will look at you as enemy of progress. let it go. shit happens, that is one of the shit dat can happen. forget about it.

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  89. Sweetheart its sooo late that I'm tempted to tell u to let it be but NO! Cos u know why the devil will never give you a cake and let u finish it! Never ever and its so obvious that the devil is at play here! I know other comments will be like u want to ruin your sister's big day and all bt pls and pls I beg u do not listen to them! Tell her plss cs marriage is not just about the 'BIG DAY' its abt what will hapen 2 yrs later, 5 yrs, 20 yrs, and u know what I see happening??? I see you and your sister's fiance getting at it again, its just too obvious since u guys did not even break up u just lost touch, sweetheart u will start having sex with him again its just the plain truth, I say please tell your sis, family members might read it as jealousy and you will face a lot of persecution but you and I know its the right thing to do so I say pray about it and then tell your sis! I wish u all d best X0X0

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  90. Forget it, she will only suspect u each time ure alone with her husband its not like it happened when they were dating

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  91. My dear, think is quite late....just leave things as it is now, u and d guy carry d burden for d rest of ur life till the bubble burst...spare a bride of her happy moment pls!...d guy shud av mentioned it though!.....niyinugar says so!

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  92. Ahn ahn,you be w**ch,you wan put sand sand inside the poor girl garri,leave the matter alone o abeg,let it be a secret you will die with,I hope say your sis nor they read Linda blog. Via BB10

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  93. linda pls post my story abt d virginity stuff,i need answers plsss

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  94. You would've told her wen they were dating..don't fink is neccessary now

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  95. U dont need to tell yr sister since some how nature seemed to have saved yr butt. No pregnancy-no child in question and a long time yr sins had passed. All u both have is guilt of yr past. U both will have to deal with that guilt to make sure the third person in this picture, yr sister, is not hurt. All this are still subject to how mature minded yr younger sister is. If she is the type that appreciates the past, but moves on with life-tell her. But for a wedding that close, keep the secret. The man should also keep the secret. As it were, she is now a man's wife.

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  96. she has the right knw whether u tell her not she will eventually find out and she wont be able to trust u nor the guy.

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  97. Ode... Is it not already too late? The weddin is tomorrow, Im sure the rice is already on d fire, abi U want them to waste money after all d plannin. This girl take time o......pls were is d wedding venue..I go like attend sha..

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  98. Just leave it!if u didn't tell her when they were dating why tell her NOW that they are getting married

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  99. There can only be friction, if you still have feelings for the guy and want to pick up where you stopped*raised eyebrows*. You should have told your sister a year ago when she introduced him.* Woah! I dated him for about a month 9 years ago, I guess he was meant to be in this family* this should have been your line, and move on. But it seems, hmmmm, you still gota feeling! Now you want to tell her eve of her wedding?!!!!! You must be a drama queen. Zip it!!! And learn to live with it, get ur own guy, babes.

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  100. Well,I think you made a mistake at first for hiding the truth from her from the unset..bkos hw wish d truth was told then is left for her to decide what she want then your conscience is cleared.now the truth is there r complications.either will hurt Ur sister and if your not carefull you will lose the bond btw u nd Ur sist.there is noway u can hide it forever and verysoon the more u see d guy d more dat same old feelings crop up.on the other hand if you tell your sist now she mit not bliv u had sex wit him befor her she mit tink it was after she introduce u guys.well now the choice is urs on wat I will tell you.if u r so matured nd u can keep Ur distance and saty in Ur own husbands house,then I will advice you not telling her,but check this case,wat if u go visiting Ur sist nd Ur sist is nt around,or d guy starts hitin up on u again?be wise dear.well my candid advice to u now is that u shud tell her in a matured way.she will freakout sure but u need explain tins to her with all sincerity.prevention is better than cure.d days ahead is still much so babe tell her ok?best of luck..Rawlings banks

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  101. Ɣ☺ΰ ought †̥☺ have told your Sister before the wedding,

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  102. U have too tell ur sister about it becos she can hear later later.tee

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  103. Why dint you just say it since??? You really should have when u met him for the first time.

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  104. Girls u ppl do make a lot of mistakes @ times wat were u waiting 4? U wldnt av waited 4 dis long u wld av told ur sis immediately u gt 2 no abt d guy dt wld av saved lot of probs nd heart brake 2 ur sis. Moreover its possible dt d guy is 4 real hw sure r u dt d guy hasn't bk d news 2 her. U no wat just allow them 2 b as 4 u just learn hw 2 gt use 2 it cos u ve gt no choice babe

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  105. tell your sister before it will be too late..*only d truth shall save you people

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  106. Let the sleeping dog lie. And make sure after they exchange vows, you never should have anything to do with that boy again!

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  107. depends how close your relationship is with your sister, such news should be broken to her easy and long ago when you noticed they were getting serious not a couple of days to the wedding

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  108. Abeg move on with your life and leave your sister alone jor!! What's all this drama for? did you have a child for him whose paternity you kept away from everybody including your family? Why don't you simply grow up and be the big sister you are meant to be? Nearly all the ladies here have had a fling or two in similar circumstances and it's only fate that sometimes makes the past partner show up in unplanned circumstances, but you must walk away from the past. OR are you secretly jealous that she's getting married and you're yet to even see a serious husband material? because if you were married or in a serious relationship, I don't see how this should be of any major concern to you, honestly. Stop acting drama please and tell yourself some serious home truths!!!

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  109. You should have told her the very first day you found out they were dating. I guess it's too late now, so just keep your mouth shut and if she eventually finds out, you would have to deal with whatever comes out of it.

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  110. My dear ,do u love ur sister?pls stay away 4rm making her sad!rather talk things over with the guy and get over your animosity!its not like he is a murderer or an armed robber dat u should fear 4 ur sister!support dem show ur maturity as an elder!hey ppl fuck all d time get over this it shouldn't be an issue.n don't go breaking ur sister's heart!if anyone should tell let it be the guy!u two should agree on wat to do!

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  111. ...and you were even hoping they would break up. WHY if i may ask? Is that how you intend to go around hoping that the marriage will also break up when they get married because it's not you he's marrying? You never talk wetin dey pain you this old chick!!

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  112. Hmmmmmmmmm! Na waaah!!! Y did u hv 2 wait ds long b4 lettn ur sista know about d bean? For me, telln her now wld definitely cause ripples. Howeva, dat guy can kill! For continuing in d affair hvn known dat u both were bed mates a couple of times. D guy is mean serious! He can b datn house girl neat in dier matrimonial home n madam no go no notn! Mshhhew! I just sori 4 ur sista! U sef fall my hand well bcos u 4 tell ur sista since u know wetn dey but u kept quiet!!! Very baaaad. U hv 2 live wit it na...abbi

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  113. but y did u allow him av sex wit you at first place??????...a guy had sex wit u and your sister too...

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  114. Hmmm, tough one...I think she should just let them be since she didn't say anything from the start. There are things that are better left unsaid.

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  115. Dis is pathetic!!#sad#,I would say she shld av tld her wen she knew D̶̲̥̅̊ε̲̣̣̣̥γ̲̣̣̥ wre dating den,telling her some days to d wedding would be worse
    .

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  116. leave things d way dey r

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  117. Pls dont tell her. İt will break her. Just be the big sis u r and avoıd or ıgnore hım. At least u wont all be lıvıng together.good luck. Hope u r marrıed Now.

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  118. dnt tell ur sis..

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  119. Naaaah,u can't tell her again.. U should have told her when she introduced the guy to u,but right now,her big day is 2moro and u can't mess it up for her... She's gonna fink u doing it outta jealousy

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  120. leave thns d way dey r, dnt tel her

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  121. pls let sleeping dogs lie.afterall it happened a very long time ago.

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  122. So long as you don't have the intention of having a secret affair with the guy, just let the sleeping dog lie.

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  123. hell no! dnt tell ur sister, its ur past wat u shld do is call the guy up both of you shld discuss ur crazy past nd put it behind you.. u dnt wnt 2 destroy ur sister's happiness

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  124. hell no! dnt tell ur sister, its ur past wat u shld do is call the guy up both of you shld discuss ur crazy past nd put it behind you.. u dnt wnt 2 destroy ur sister's happiness

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  125. Its already late. Wen u wud hav said something was right after d introduction. Except u want to cause serious confusion

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  126. For u to have waited till a day to their wedding, I advise u wait till after the wedding. I just feel it's too late to tell her already.

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  127. Tell her - she has a right to know but it shouldn't matter as this was way before the dude met your sis. By not telling her & if she later finds out then it will look as if you guys have actually committed a sin - on this occasion, tell your sis calmly, don't choose the option of let sleeping dog lie oh!! These things always hav a funny way of coming out in d end oh! Good luck..

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  128. INSTEAD OF HOPING THEY WOULD BREAKUP, YOU SHOULD HAVE TOLD HER FROM THE START. FROM THE VERY MINUTE YOU MET HIM AS HER BOYFRIEND.

    FOR NOW I THINK YOU SHOULD LET SLEEPING DOGS LIE...AVOID HIM AND YOU DONT HAVE TO SEE THEM TOGETHER...CALL YOUR SISTER OFTEN AND MEET HER UP FOR LUNCH AND DRINKS...KEEP MEETING HIM TO FAMILY GATHERINGS ONLY WHEN YOU CANT HELP IT...WHEN YOU GET YOUR OWN MAN IT WON'T MATTER...

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  129. pls move on wit ur life nd let him move on wit his, evrythn is in d past, dnt dig up old buried wounds.. u'v been advised 'shut ur trap' dnt tel her anythin is all past tense..

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  130. You shoulda told your sis after she introduced him or when you confirmed they were serious. Saying it now would seem like you are trying to break them up! The wedding is in a few days, so donot let her go into her home being paranoid! You should tell your mum or a sibling about knowing him intimately in the past though, just incase he tells his wife eventually. You must do this! There must still be something between you two, if you can't look eachother directly in the eye, or communicate. If he loves his wife, I'm sure he woulda told her by now, and trust me someone must've noticed both of you not communicating! You should let someone know!

    Serious warning: Never ever have anything to do with him again, not a kiss, nothing! Try as much as possible too, to limit visits to their home!Goodluck....TC

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  131. You don't have to tell her,you both had a fling,no strings no attachments...you both lost contact of each other and none of you bothered to keep in touch obviously you both had not even one feeling for each other.so its not much of a big deal.don't ruin ur sisters happiness because of a fling that happened 9yrs bk.

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  132. if anybody shld do the telling is her hubby 2 b, leave them alone dnt spoil things 4 them ur sister wil nt 4give u.. pls dnt tell her

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  133. SINCE IT WAS NUTTIN SERIOUS DNT SAY ANYTHING..THE GUY HAS MOVED ON SO U DO SAME.

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  134. Shut up and don't ruin your sister's happiness, you whore. Nobody send u to play cheap, so don't be jealous that your sis is getting married to the same guy you opened your leg to.

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  135. no tel am oooo, ur younger sister 4 dat mattress ehm matter.. hmmmm u b winch????

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  136. move on, let it go..say nurrin

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  137. wats wrong in telling ur sister about ur ex? Pls tell her, its past life na, atleast ur conscience will free u, n if she can still cope with d guy, they will still get married....

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  138. dny say a word just let by gone b by gone..

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  139. Keep that fling to yourself.. You could be causing some troubles if you tell her!

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  140. no talk o jare'

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  141. you left it too late my dear, my piece of advice for you is to keep your trap shut. Call the guy aside and straighten things with him. Are you married now or not? If you are not pls keep your legs tightly crossed whenever you visit them which by the way should be Once per year for the next ten years! You had ur own chance remember, so dnt try anything funny with your sis hubby! She o ti gbo?

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  142. First to comment...i laff in suwaeli

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  143. Its was in the past, as long as u two dont continue from where u stopped in the past, then let sleeping dogs lie. Sister dont spoil her big day

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  144. Did u rily ve 2 put dis public SMH?Fair enough.....he wasn't her boifrnd wen u wr.....(Lipseald) its past,besides am sure wt d broadcast she might just know already so u decided she has d right 2 know,dis move is nt in accordance wt what is morally right u ve mishandled.

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  145. You should have told ur sis when u heard they were getting married. not a few days to the wedding. I doubt u have her best interest. Imagine the scandal

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  146. Pls tell ur sister abt it bcos it wld №† only make​U̶̲̥̅̊ feel light hearted,it wld also β α plus on ur path bcos​U̶̲̥̅̊ r her sister nd she xpects 2 hear it 4rm​U̶̲̥̅̊ 1st nd nt her husband 2 β.its beta sed late dan never

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  147. pls don't tell her. just let it go.

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  148. pls dnt tell her, just let it go.

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  149. Why didn't u talk when she introduced u guys? It would have been easier 4her. Her wedding is on sat and u want to tell her on friday. You are wickedly callous! U no even consider d families involved.
    If u knw ull be sleeping with him after,kuku tell her now

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  150. Yes tell ur sister let d guy too be there when u are telling her but an elderly person dat will be dere . Its in d past not present so be strong and act like a big sister.

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  151. Sweetheart, if i were you i will be totaly silent about it. i'm saying this based on the experience i had in school.


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  152. Girl get a life. That was both of you past, why wait this long to tell your sister. you should have told her a long time ago.

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  153. What dirty friction? Do you still want him? Be a big girl and suck it up!

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  154. .My dear. Leave as it is. Let them be. Move on. You should hv said sométhing, if you wanted to, before now. Its late.

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  155. i think u should tell her. her husband was to tell her in the first place, that clearly means that therez alot he still hiding from her. i see no reasons y u guys should hide it, it was in the past and it was a fling that bearly lasted for a month. let it go. tell ur sister and save ur future and ur sister's marriage

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  156. Pls tell ur sis, it will save u alot problems in future. Besides it will keep u on toes and help u not to ever flirt with him

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  157. This is really bad! When you mean 'friction' between you and the guy hope that doesn't translate to 'attraction' because if it does, that's a serious issue. You should have told her before now, but telling her a day to her wedding is just really terrible. I don't have any advice on this matter sha... Btw, Guys are evil!

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    ReplyDelete
  159. no need again, u want to spoil her happiness and live guilt-free, you should have told her since when they were dating,

    now, you will carry the burden

    plus the guy should have told her sef, if he means well.

    Just saying.

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  160. If you did not vomit the truth the first day you saw them together, then take it to the grave with you. Since neither yourself nor the boy deemed it fit to tell your sister the truth, do not blow their chance of finding long-term happiness....

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  161. I think 8years, is enough time not 2 remember hw it was when d both of u had sex, 2me its no big deal, it happened a very long time ago, its not like it happned lastweek, so jst be frnds with d guy, since u cal it a fling, I bliv d both of u dnt have feelings 4 each other, no need 2 ruin ur sistaz happiness pls.

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  163. The fact is that you should have told your sister before now.......its really too late now to tell her,cos if you do, you will spoil her day..........just forget it....don't tell her

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  164. Let them be, shit happens.. that was in the past, but better to let the secret out....if the guy didnt tell ur sister or has not told , then his not real but fake...

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  165. That's a very foolish question. How can you go and tell her. What happened between you and your younger sister's huband to be was in the PAST. Let it stay there. Unless you are not happy she got married before you and wants to ruin her joy. It is not as if she snatched the boy from you. It is not as if you and the guy had a serious relationship in the past. For the guy to still want to go ahead and marry your sister (after knowing you are related means he loves her and really wants to be with her. Let them be!!!

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  166. Two things, if you have (ABSOLUTELY!) no feelings (ANYMORE!) for the guy then both of you should meet and talk about it. Be open and move on 'cos what both of you are feeling is just a simple awkwardness that you're both seeing each other again that's all. But if you still have feelings for him STOP IT RIGHT NOW! Don't think about it, don't ponder over it, don't consider anything. LET HIM GO NOOOOW O! Before you destroy a family relationship you effortlessly built throughout your growing-up lives with your sister

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  167. You need to discuss it and come to a conclusion with her hubby, u both either decide to tell her or both decide to forever hold ur peace! But pls must be a joint decission/agreement with her hubby, its not entirely ur decision to make because he is involved aswell.

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  168. What's the friction you guys have?? Was it not eight or nine years ago? Pls, just let things be except you are not telling us the whole story. Abi are you still in love with him ni?
    Uzo

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  169. SHATAP N LET SLEEPING DOGS LIE.

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  170. You should have told her earlier on before things got serious with them, now I still think you should tell her now because there is nothing hidden under the sun and the truth must still come out one day. It would be better she hears it from you than someone else

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  171. You should have told your sister immediately upon becoming aware, to enable you two resolve the issue one way or the other. Having now acquiesced, it is too late in the day to spill. Therefore, forever, hold your peace.

    Richard Somade

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  172. Pls don't tell her,its in the past and should remain there,u had an opportunity to tell her when they were just dating now u want to tell her wen they r engaged.....so wrong dear

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  173. I think you should just forget about it and move on. Unless d guy is trying to play funny like coming after u..There is every tendency he moved on bcos he lost contact with you and u can't really blame him for dt

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  174. There are some secret you take to the grave.....this is one of them.....*Dont tell ur sis*.....Let it go.......

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  175. What I think is... Tell ur sister about it, not with the intention of getting them to break up, but to take the load off your heart. Let her be the one to decide if she still would want to marry him after getting the information. But please tell her. Its better she hears now that after she is married to him.

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  176. Keep shut n pray ur Sis doesn't find out. Dnt flirt with him again.

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  177. 8 years after???? please move on and let the sleeping dog rest.

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  178. NINE years ago the jealous badbelle sisteh cannot let it go. Tell your sister to call off the engagement with the guy cos he slept with you and you can't be happy for her and just keep your mouth shut and forget it ever happened. Or was he so 'unforgettable'? :/
    Oh and btw, if you don't fuck up their wedding, where is the venue let's come and chop rice :D

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  179. is it that u are having feeling for the guy or what? pls allow them be... dont destroy your sis happiness , 7yrs is not 7days dat no contact between u and d guy he prefre ur sis to you ... let dem be . am not being harsh just understand

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  180. As long as it won't happen again,please leave things the way they are..Don't kill the poor girl's joy.Kaiy

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  181. leave things the way they are.

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  182. Are you asking for our help a day to the wedding? They must av told you they were getting marries @̤̥̣̈̊̇ least 3months ago! Y didn't you ask for help then?
    Well, I believe in transparency! Shez ur sister n she deserves to know but before you tell her, let d man in question be aware that you άrέ telling her or better still both of you should tell her together AFTER the weDding tomorrow... Cos its too shor a notice for her to absorb it before d wedding.
    JayBerry.

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  183. why do u wanna tell her? its in the past now and life goes on. All you have to do is make sure u don't have feelings for him and likewise him. He should be able to love your sister above every other thing. You are past in his life, he's also past in your life. Abeg leave your sister to enjoy her truely found love. In as much the guy didn't know she was your sister.

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  184. I think you should tell your sister,but make it clear to them both that you're over it,come on this was 9 years ago.

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  185. Pls let d past be n allow ur sis to be happy,its neither u or ur sister`s fault.

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  186. let it be, tell your in law to be he has a responsibilty of letting hisfiancee know. but its just too late.

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  187. Better tell her, if she should find out herself, it wouldn't be nice..

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  188. well this is scary, sometimes i think its better to let sleeping dogs lie as long as nothing is ever going to happen btw you guys again cos saying something might actually hurt ur sis and ruin your marriage so let it go and avoid him the best way you can

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  189. Wow!!!! Douche bag ALERT!!! He is a major ass and you did WRONG by not telling your sister when she first introduced him to you. You strike me as a very shady character to have kept this IMPORTANT bit of information to yourself. The only way to have the right answer is to ask yourself how you will feel if the reverse was the case. Will you want to spend the rest of your life with a man who has had "more than a taste" of your sister??? He is scum and she needs to know the real him and also realise the kind of sister she has....YOU SHOULD HAVE DIVULGED THIS CRUCIAL INFORMATION AGES AGO....Abeg, I'm angry (if this is a true story oh *rolling my eyes*)

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  190. I think u r a witch sha, why did u wait till 2days to d wedding? speak now or forever hold ur peace.

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  191. Hi, i think your sister deserves to know and it is not that a big deal now. But sooner or later if she finds out on her own, that could be a disaster and she would HATE you for ever. You might check out my inspiring articles at http://sadiqdaniel.blogspot.com

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  192. I already know hun...thank u 4 not telling me all these years,so shuld I dump him u tel me

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  193. truth never hides forever! i bet your sis would never forgive you for keeping it a secret for so long and then nw, making efforts to tell her just when she;s about to get wedded to the same guy!
    u shud sit and talk it thru with d dude, except of course u secretly nuture some feelings for him. u shud stop playing hide and seek with him. deal with it foryour kid sis sake, talk things thru with the dude n then u both consider either to tell ur sis or not! cos if u dnt deal with it nw, it'l resurface in future! God help u cos it may sound so easy but its not

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  194. Since you've waited this long, i think u should just carry it to your grave. you've had almost a year plus to tell her when they just started dating and you didnt. it will be in very bad taste for u to tell her the night before her wedding dont u think? spare her the drama and just zip it. perhaps u should talk to the guy to make sure both of u are on d same page and just let sleeping dogs lie.

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  195. In my own opinion, you should have done that at the inception. Right now, i don't think there is any need for that anymore cos they are already about getting married. I think its you and the guy that actually need to sit and talk about it like grownups that you both are now and let it be bygone and as such relate well with each other or else....you are still interested in the Guy.

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Disclaimer: Opinions expressed in comments are those of the comment writers alone and does not reflect or represent the views of Linda Ikeji.

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