The abuse? What's going on with marriages these days? Read her official statement after the cut...
Respected entertainer and one of Africa's leading talking drummers, Ara, has issued a statement, saying she's parting with her husband Prince Nurudeen Olalekan Saliu. The couple exchanged wedding vows on June 4, 2009. The pair will remain friends, Ara says. And they will continue to
jointly support their child.
"We've been separated since January', the musician says. 'But because I do not want rumours to start flying, and I think, out of respect, all my friends and fans need to know what's happening to me, I think it's right to set the records straight once and for all on this. We're no longer together and we're both happy. We've both moved on'.
'I'm single again. But I will not be searching for now'. 'I've taken this decision very painfully; and it's particularly a tough and sensitive time for me and my son. And I plead with my friends and fans to put us in their prayers at this period'.
The musician who is working to release her new materials, while also dedicating her time to helping disadvantaged women and children, says she will 'not be granting any interviews for now. I want to give my
son all the attention he needs; and when I do have to talk, it'll be about my current love : My music'.
'I pray my friends in the media understand this. They've been very supportive since my early days. And I believe they'll stand by me at this trying period also...'
Aralola and Nurudeen got married at the Oshodi/Isolo registry on June 4, 2009. The marriage is presently in the process of annulment.
WTF...This is what happens when people get married for the wrong reasons, growing up i can't remember if i had any friend with divorced parents. These days folks don't look before they leap and end up jumping ship before you say JACK!
ReplyDeletena wa ooo, and for us still single pple wld be bothering us that we are not married yet. who want to go into an abusive marriage. no not me.
ReplyDeleteAra am sure u made the best decision for u, hope pple wld learn do follow their heart and head together not either or.
marriage is a union blessed by God,people we need to start praying cz the devil is really out yo destroy it.it is not a do or die affair but God definitly approves it..people shuld get married for the right reasons,not cz they want to show off or satisfy society or cz age is not on their side.let's find out from those who have had it good and find out how it works if u are interested in it..ultimatetly we are all searching for unconditional love,from anoda person.Let's be honest with ourselves when we see good marriages or couples who are happy don't we all get a little envious? marriage is not for everyone yes i agree but get married for the rite reasons!..I believe with God all things are possible abi we don't believe that anymore?..cz these days we all seem to be doing things like there is no God.I don't go to church o!..have not been there for years but I love God and respect him,I fast,pray u name it{i mean common he created us!} but well I guess i shuld start doing all of these with the brethren!..ok where am i heading to with all of this .. God holds the key to everything..wisdom in finding a good partner and having a beautiful marriage.yes trust me he does.KAPISH!{My hand don dey pain me abeg}...NB:I come from a polygamous marriage,infact i was born outta wedlock and didn't learn so many fantastic things bout marriage ,grew up watching my dad beat my mum,but i made up my mind that if i ever get married it wuld definitly be different.I hoping to get married soon sha!..whoo hoo!
ReplyDeleteat third commentator, WOW! when i see a happily married couple (especially an older couple) it makes my heart warm, not envious. maybe thats just you, darling.
ReplyDeletewomen, remember, its not all about finding the right man or whatever, you have to look at yourself to see if you will attract the right man.
#okbye
Na wa o, am really scared about this marriage thing o considering how marriages are either breaking or the couples are slicing each other's throat! God help all of us that are still single o. Ara, guess u take the right decision, if marriage doesnt work out, pls face ur career and ur son, Marriage is not meant to be endured but enjoyed! God will strenghten u
ReplyDeletealicia i really love u o!..infact i think u rock! abeg no vex na too much typing cause am.. lol!
ReplyDeleteErm divorce does not mean a marriage was for the wrong reasons, neither does staying together mean it was for the right ones...
ReplyDeleteat least they both walked out alive. i am happy they agreed to disagree amicably
ReplyDelete@ Annoymous 9:15pm.. u HIT the nail on the head!!!
ReplyDeleteAnon July 7, 2011 9:15 PM...you nailed it
ReplyDeleteWell , when you let society dictate when and how, you either end up like ara or Titi ( the lady that was murdered). Marriage no be by force. Get married when you wanna, give it your best shot..hopefully God will bless your union. And if it ain't working, part on good terms and move the hell on. As for me I want a longterm partner and children...if marriage comes whenever and I feel I can, why not, and if otherwise well to me being happy with myself is the ultimate elixir.
ReplyDeleteFirst anon: You probably didn't see people divorcing when you were growing up because marriage was a do-or-die affair back then. The only way you left it was 'If death did you part'.
ReplyDeleteI don't necessarily think that it was because of people making better choices in marriage - remember they married younger anyway, and most times were match made etc. I think the societal taboo of divorces/separations were greater.
Of course it meant more people were likely to get killed in abusive relationships than leave them, so all in all, good luck to Ara for not choosing to die like a chicken.
well i guess our culture is gradually being westernised. these are stars we look up to. what happens to other people having challenges in their marriages? they divorce immediately. why? if Ara can do it and be happy for it, why don't i? I fear for the African identity.
ReplyDeletewe need 2 start looking at marriage critically.cos wen some people say dt dy wont ever get married(wit these stories flying around)we wont look at dem as if dey r possessed or 4rm anoda planet o.its well.
ReplyDeleteAra God will definetly pull u tru this period of ur lyf.
Linda, all these news of the 'horrors' in some marriages isnt going to encourage unmarried people to get married o. or is the aim to deter peopl from getting married?why dont we try putting up more happy images instead. afterall the sufferings,breakups,stabbings in marriage are just a few of married people.what of the happily married of so many years, why dont we celebrate them as often?or is this the 'bad news travel fast' syndrome?truth is, no single partnership on earth is rosy, even that between siblings.my humble oppinion sha
ReplyDeleteWas she not the one saying that genevieve nnaji and d'banj are seriously in love, that we should and need to see the two together - this was on stella dimoko korkus' blog. This was during the 'fall in love' fever . Na wa o. May God Almighty give her strength at this time. Na wa ri ti
ReplyDelete@anonymous 9:15 kisses
ReplyDeleteMarriage has become a no go area....
ReplyDeleteAs for me, I wan born pikin for a Latin American Rich guy and be a single business mother and live happily ever after shikenan! lol
D fact that our parents ddnt get divorced then doesn't mean their marriages were rosy. Trust me, women took a lot of shit, plus beating during the formative years of their marriage. Just think we're a less tolerant generation.
ReplyDeleteN i agree wiv anon 9.15, divorce doesn't mean d marriage was for the wrong reasons. Love is a decision that you need to keep reinforcing after the wedding..
But if it aint walking, take a walk luv....
My sisters if you didnt remember God back when you were opening leg around, sleeping around and even sleeping with dude before you married. Why on earth do you think God should sustain you after you married? Same thing applies to the fellas!
ReplyDeleteYou picked the dude/woman and did everything wrong, and decided you didnt want Him to be a part of it. Yes you decided that when you said you werent going to do it His way but yours. So He left you, and then later when katakata burst and you hurt and its over, folk start mentioning God.
Please I'm not saying for all, but many times, folks chose a spouse on their own, they never stop to ask God. They see it as survival of the fittest and end up wanting to plase man (either man around aka folks), or please man, that dude that is in the picture.
As a married person, I can tell you that marriage is tough even when you know without any doubt that your spouse is for you. As in even if God gives you vision and says this is your husband or wife, you'll still walk through the fire. The difference is that if you had let him in from the get go, and you yield to him in obedience, still obeying what He tells you in the marriage, when you experience the difficult times, He takes you both through it, and you come out stronger and more connection, more aware of your deep intimacy and love.
Its sad to look around and see many people getting a warped view on marriage, or stayign married and really not enjoying it. Its a journey of life, and together each strengthens the other.
Jay O: u hit the nail on the head.May God continue to bless your marriage and may God continue to mould me into the kind of person i would like to spend the rest of my life with
ReplyDeletesassycassie
Jay O, we need ur words of wisdom at www.wivesroundtable.net!!!
ReplyDeletejay ooooo llove ur coments!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteg
ReplyDeleteAnonymous July 7, 2011 7:46 PM
ReplyDeleteCan you not tell it happened in the olden days too and people managed to hide it, as a 5 year old girl I remember my dad beating my mum ( no one discusses it now)
Women are now seeing that the society is less rigid about die there marriages...abeg if you are being abused LEAVE!!!!!!
@ July 7, 2011 7:46 PM, I don't know which olden days you are talking about o. My grandma had 2 husbands, my best friend's grandma had 3 husbands and I have lots of friends with grandmas married to between 2-4 men. Looking doesn't mean you would see everything, one needs a lot of prayers when it comes to marriage. So pls don't be quick to criticise.
ReplyDelete@damie ... the reason is because people like your grandma were ostracized and tended to flock together.
ReplyDelete