Dear LIB readers: birth control is not working for me | Welcome to Linda Ikeji's Blog

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Wednesday 2 January 2013

Dear LIB readers: birth control is not working for me

From a LIB reader
My husband looked at me last night and said 'this is a new year, the day you deny me of sex again will mark the end of our marriage.'
Let me go back to how my husband and I got here. I have four kids. The initial plan was for us to have just two. The third child was unplanned. And just seven months after I gave birth to my third child I became pregnant again though I was on birth control. My last pregnancy made me so depressed that I contemplated having an abortion several times. My doctor talked me out of it. 
I started taking birth control pills after the second child was born but I've since had two more children that wasn't planned for so now I'm paranoid and I constantly give excuses whenever my husband wants sex. If I get pregnant again, I'd probably kill myself. But my husband has threatened to end the marriage if I keep denying him sex. I don't want anymore children and birth control is not working for me. What do I do?

242 comments:

1 – 200 of 242   Newer›   Newest»
Anonymous said...

Tie your tubes

Sugabelly said...

Your husband needs to get a vasectomy. And a man that would threaten divorce over sex really needs counseling.

Anonymous said...

I guess this question is for the Doctors not anyhow people.

Anonymous said...

Okay

★★PRINCE CHARMING™★★ said...

You didn't state the type of birth control method that is not working for you, pills I guess. See a doctor and consider the other more secure birth control methods like vasectomy for your husband or you using a diaphragm.

Anonymous said...

Go for a family planning.

CerebrallyBusy said...

It's really easy, go tie your fallopian tubes. It is a temporary procedure, and if you later decide to have more kids, you can untie it. But yeah if you tie your tubes, you won't get pregnant

justlikeme@live.com said...

Seriously?? What happened to that thing they call UCCID or UCID or whatever it is.

You shouldnt even be asking.

Naija una too much, i sip my coffee jeje

Anonymous said...

Whatever happened to condoms dear?

Unknown said...

pele but i feel you haven't just found the right birth control method for you or maybe your hubby should be the one on birth control

Anonymous said...

there are many options for contraceptive... I guess since you now have 4 children, permanently "tying" your womb would be a safe and marriage-saving option.

Anonymous said...

Damn. I can't stand Nigerian men and their lack of consideration. He should understand your fears and talk you through them instead of giving ultimatums. I want to vomit. ugh.

1. Ask him to consider getting a vasectomy, it's fairly riskfree for men (knowing Nigerian men sha, good luck with that)

2. Insist on using condoms until you can find a birth control method that works for you. Try IUDs instead of pills as you might be taking other medication that counteract the efficacy of the pills (or not taking them as frequently as you should)

3. Sex is something that should bring you two together, and not closing your eyes and opening your legs so that Oga won't leave you. If you're not getting pleasure out of it, try really hard to discuss reasons why and try something new.

All these reasons could help if you have a considerate partner instead of the domineering dictators I see so often in Naija. Good luck.

Anonymous said...

Go and get your tubes tied fast. Visit a doctor and have it done

Anonymous said...

You must be very stupid and wicked woman for denying your husband of sex.If i were to be ur husband,i would have gotten alternative.Birt control ko Birth control ni...Are you God?shior

Muideen Saliu said...

To the writer (Not Linda) have you ever sit down to talk with your man on the issue? If yes, have you and him meet experts (I mean doctors) and explain the situation of things because I'm pretty sure that there are very many preventive measures to control birth.

Anonymous said...

Some women are not normal sha...

Anonymous said...

What kind of birth control are you using dear? Try changing it. And if you are absolutely sure you do not want any more children and not having sex will definitely end your marriage, then please go and tie your tubes. But first try changing your contraceptives. Maybe use IUCD and condoms at the same time.

Anonymous said...

Go and get your tubes tied fast. Visit a doctor and have it done

segunsd said...

Na wa for you o. If you don't want kids again you should ask your husband to do vasectomy... (castration) or you should cut your ovum. Don't deny your husband of sex.

It reminds me of my story HONEYMOON

Anonymous said...

What about a condom? It's far better than any other form of contraception.

Anonymous said...

There are different methods of birth control, since its clear the pill isn't working for u, talk to your doctor on other available birth controls out there. For example there is the coil, injection and there is also implant. So explore the options out there...gud luck

Stanley Onduru said...

Don't rily know what advice to give though but I tink she should rily talk with her husband....nd work out sumfin asap to keep the marriage...check out yelnats fashion on facebook or ping 277DDBCD for dope nd tush clothings nd accessories.

Anonymous said...

Dear madam, haave thought about having your womb tied? obviously condoms r out of the question hes ur husband and wont like that! More importantly there are several easy methods to solve this issue....ah ahn is your doctor a learner??

Anonymous said...

IUD!....get an IUD! SOME STIL GET PREGNANT WITH IT, BUT JUST EXPLORE OTHER OPTIONS!! (i.e the patch)

Dolly said...

U can try other forms of birth control asides d pills.meet a family planning specialist.

Anonymous said...

i meant have you thought about getting your womb tied...

bunny said...

Use birth control injection or pregnancy patch which prevents u from getting pregnant for a period of time.. Or yet again tie ur tubes..lol

Anonymous said...

If u are sure u don't want anymore children, go & hv ur womb tied.. Oh yeah, ur hubby is an ass for threatening to divorce u cuz of sex ;(..

Anonymous said...

tie ur tubes.....dear

Afrofab chic said...

See your gynaecologist. You may have not being keeping to ur birth control pill schedule. There are many options for birth control, sadly no can say they are 100% effective. A few are 99%. Abstinence is the only sure way but u are married so that is out of the option. See ur gynae for another option.

Anonymous said...

Uproot ur womb!

Anonymous said...

Seriously!!! Dnt u av a doctor or sumtin

Anonymous said...

pls...linda is not a Dr. Go to your doctor for advise...there are various contraceptive methods available these days to ensure/guarantee that u never have a child again!
Linda pls, stop posting these stories, it's not like u verify them to determine if they are real or not...even if they are real pls, they shd google there is a lot of information they can obtain from just googling!!!
these posts about given advise are just plain annoying!!!

Z

Anonymous said...

Stoping using pill, go for IUD its safer and last for years

ibiluv said...

why give him excuses?

when he cheats on you now-it will turn to he has a child outside wedlock or he is cheating on me

every woman only ovulates once a month?

why not get in tune with your body?

there are all sorts of birth control methods.....

the wisest thing to do is to combine methods

go see a doc wit family planning skillsets

others have successfully stayed married with only the number of children they planned for

and whatever happened to one or both of you tying your tubes?

God's speed

Anonymous said...

U and ur husband must talk it out, made him to understand

Anonymous said...

Stoping using pill, go for IUD its safer and last for years

Anonymous said...

Go to a doctor and find out wht contraceptive works for your body,condom too is birth control maybe ur hubby shuld tink abt dat as well(selfish man)

Anonymous said...

What about family planning?please there are so many vast options to chose 4rm.take charge of the siutation

Anonymous said...

freeze ur ovaries!

Anonymous said...

see a geanacologist for family planing

xeun said...

Pills in my opinion is not the best form of birth control.you need to visit a general hospital if you are in Nigeria and see the family planning nurses.they are well trained and will advise you on the options available.by the way,isn't your husband interested?both of you are supposed to make the decision whether you want more kids or not and contraceptive options available.
Cheers

Anonymous said...

There are other more reliable forms of Birth control that are considered more effective u cld discuss that with ur Dr,u dnt have to go to the extreme of denying ur spouse S** thereby endangering ur marriage plus ur Husb shd be involved in the decision.

palo said...

Your husband should use a condom or consider having a vesectomy since he can't control his uurges *pervert!!

In this day and age with high cost of living he wants u to give birth to a football team before he stops.mtscheew

As for u learn and understand ur cycle abortion is never an option

Anonymous said...

Use a condom!

Anonymous said...

pls sweet! Make use of protections b4 or immedaitely after sex. Condoms are availble, pills, herbs! Jst prevent urself 4rm getting pregnant again. U can't denie ur husband of sex oooo

Anonymous said...

ur probably not using d best birth control. tell ur doctor to check ur body well and find out d best one dat suits ur body. there must be one dat will work 4 u. consider IUCD, its probably one d best 4 every body type. dont allow ur marriage to die wen u can revive it.

Anonymous said...

First of all you should explain to ur dick head husband that you dont want anymore children then go see a doctor as there are many options of birth control out there.

Anonymous said...

Go for an IUD.

Loisy said...

There are several other birth control methods besides pills. Visit a family planning clinic in a tertiary health centre and make a choice asap. Nobody need be denied sex.

Anonymous said...

Why not talk to ur doc, probaly u would remove ur womb.

baby said...

there are many forms of family planning. If you have been attending ante natal classes, you should have learnt this. There are natural and artificial methods. So you need to talk with your husband and doctor and decide which method would work most for you. Its hard enough raising one child.

Anonymous said...

First, you are very fertile and that's a good thing. Tubal ligation (tying of the fallopian tubes) or hysterectomy (removal of the ovaries) can work for you but they are permanent methods. Too expensive? Your husband should pay for it since he is insisting.

Anonymous said...

Discuss wt ur hubby n consider having ur tubes tied.its irreversible n u will never get pregnant again.google bilateral tubal ligation n check out ur options.goodluck

Anonymous said...

Gt an IUD inserted. Its the only birth control without the release of hormones into the body and can last for 10years and minimum of 5years. Its the best method of birth control sofar.

Anonymous said...

JUST TRY TO KNOW WHEN you are ovulating and reach a no sex agreement with your your husband at this period. Apply plenty wisdom sha and take care

Anonymous said...

what a childish question. Talk to your husband abt it and tell him to use condom or redrawing method shikena!

Anonymous said...

tell ur husband to use any other means of contraceptive measures such as gold circle, or he can go do vasectomy as well, bt its a no no idea for me....
or u can be avin sex by using d withdrawal method..its very sensitive tho.
Note: dnt deny ur husband sex for whatsoever reason lest u ave ur hungry cunt to blame.

#ejikebigdick

Anonymous said...

I know what you can do, if this is real, you need to send an email to "mynameis@cheerful.com" and I will be glad to enlighten you. All you need is dedication and little or no time and you will be happy again. No need for any abortion or pills as those two can cause you irreparable damage.

Anonymous said...

dear,try implant or iucd.

Anonymous said...

Can't you get your Obs to tie your tubes and be done with it?

Anonymous said...

Drink shots of brandy after every round of sex. You'd be surprised pregnancy will be far from you. Or if you can afford it, surgically remove your womb.

Anonymous said...

There r other 4ms of birth control besides abstinence woman! There r d implants, injectables/tubal ligation(permanent method).Talk to ur Dr to know which suits u. And hey!don't go denying ur hubby his ryts, even d good Lord will nt back u on dat...Quit being a cry baby oh! Mama

Anonymous said...

Hmmm, na wa o! You sound awfully clueless for someone who is supposedly married with kids. Didn't you get any sexual education at all?

There are many things you can do...

1. Get your tubes tied (hysterectomy)

2. Change your birth control! I don't know what kind of crappy birth control you're using but you clearly need a new prescription. Maybe you need to try a diaphragm or something...

3. Consider trying alternative 'entry' modes during intercourse. I won't say more than this. If you're truly married and not a virgin you will understand what I am suggesting.

4. It shouldn't need to be said, but make sure you consult with your doctor.

Anyway, xxxo best of luck you!

Anonymous said...

see or talk to a gyno or better still a trained counsellor

friskyjennie said...

Dumb question!
Are contraceptives the only birth control method??
Smh
Besides that, do all LIBers working in the hospital that you're gonna get an xpert advice from here??
Obviously, u forgot ur brain in 2012

Boladale Kolade said...

Very Simple, ask him to go for a vasectomy. Why do men like to shelve their responsibilities when it is clear that it is the men that love sex and want it everyday? the other option is for u to remove ur uterus. there are a lot of women living that way

ola said...

wat kind of birth control are u using?u need to state and then tell ur doctor d best option avaiable for u.im sure ur doctor will recommend something good

Boladale Kolade said...

Very Simple, ask him to go for a vasectomy. Why do men like to shelve their responsibilities when it is clear that it is the men that love sex and want it everyday? the other option is for u to remove ur uterus. there are a lot of women living that way

Anonymous said...

I use coil or copper T. It works. Ask ur gynea for it.

Anonymous said...

He should have a bisectomy,

Anonymous said...

I use copper T or coil. It works. Ask ur gynea for it.

GALORE said...

bfor sex,,take LIME or afta sex,,take Becham....you will be alrite,,,,u wont be pregnant.......Or when hvin sex wt ur husband,,,dont let his sperm enter ur yansh ooooo.......*Lord help u*....abii,,make una dey use Condom

Anonymous said...

!
@ d writer plz see a doctor, der r many birth controls dt will SUIT u!
Try anoda nd dnt d deny ur hubby
#stevebond007

bent said...

Go see a doctor he/she is in d rite position 2 tell u wat 2 do okay and u shudnt deny ur husband of sex u cud sit down and talk 2 him about dis and believe me he will reason wit u okay and please go easy on ursef

Ms. Lawyer said...

Why in the word would you deny your husband sex if you don't want to end your marriage? please go and tie your uterus or something. i am sure if you googled birth control options, you would find a suitable solution that would work for you and you can tell your doctor,or go to another hospital because it seems like your doctor doesn't have solutions for you.

Anonymous said...

Oh, I forgot to add:

I really hope this I'm being paranoid, but have you and your husband discussed the number of kids you want to have? Two unplanned extra mouths to feed is not something a guy will take easily.

If both of you are on the same page regarding kids your hubby will be more understanding of your worry about getting pregnant. He seems strangely accepting of the risk...

Are you sure those pills you're popping are really birth control pills? Talk to your husband, know what he wants, then you can act accordingly regarding new birth control methods.

Anyway, xxxo

welcome to Kemi's blog said...

stop using birth control pills. it messes up your emotions, and hormones. besides,its not a sure way of preventing pregnancies. it will just set you on a weight gaining trip.
talk to your doctor, and try IUCD. its effective, and you can get it removed if you want more kids.
Stop starving that poor man!

Anonymous said...

Tie your tubes or do a complete removal ( hysterectomy) QED!

Anonymous said...

Don't think there Ȋ̝̊̅ƨ̣̣̣̇̇̇ any particular person dat Birth Control(bc) cannot work ƒό̲̣̣̣̥r̲̅. It A̶̲̥̅̊ℓℓ depend on the Form of BC and how u Α̲̅я̩̥̊ε̲̣̣̣̥ using it. Since u have decided not to have more kids, u can meet Ɣ☺U̶̲̥̅̊я̲̅ gynaecologist to discuss the various options available and choose d best form BC dat Ȋ̝̊̅ƨ̣̣̣̇̇̇ suitble ƒό̲̣̣̣̥r̲̅ u other than Pills.
U don't have to starve Ɣ☺U̶̲̥̅̊я̲̅ husband of sex cos of d fear of getting pregnant cos there Ȋ̝̊̅ƨ̣̣̣̇̇̇ someone who Ȋ̝̊̅ƨ̣̣̣̇̇̇ ready to give it to him at d snap of his fingers. Goodluck.

Anonymous said...

denying your husband of sex definitely isn't the answer!!!! you should both discuss it, perhaps he can have another vasectomy. If not then you should both be open to the possibility of another child. Besides what kind of birth control are you on.

Anonymous said...

I know is not easy, but most men don't know how hard and painful it is to give birth to a child, and what it dose to woman's body and mind.

I have two kids my self, the last one is a little terrorist, she is killing us we don't sleep anymore. My husband and I have decided we are not having anymore kids, and there's no room for mistakes.

What we do in terms of sex, we still have sex normally but we are very careful. you can't deny him of sex. Both of you should sit and talk about it, ask the right question. as you don't want anymore kids, find out if he still wants more kids, like that you'll understand more, and if he doesn't want more kids you can relax and enjoy sex life with your husband, if you keep denying him of it, he 'll get it somewhere else.
he just doesn't have to drop it in every time you guys have sex. I wish you all the best be strong.

Anonymous said...

U guys shd engage in withdrawal method. First to comment !!!!!! #dancing alingo

princessa said...

I still don't understand y u don't want more kids.
Can ur husband afford the best for these kids? Is he complaining or u are not enjoying ur marriage or u think four kids are enough?
U need to discuss ths with ur husband and both of u shld come to an agreement together and if u both can't agree pls go tie ur tubes am sure that will work.

Anonymous said...

Vasectomy for both of you. That'll surely work.

Anonymous said...

What type were you using?
Were you using it properly?
Have you been to a family planning clinic?

Anonymous said...

Lady it's 2013. Try different methods of birth control. Or talk to your hubby abt a vasectomy. You're giving yourself headache than U need to

Anonymous said...

O ma ga.......Simple Answer...talk to him, let him know the reason......and if he loves you, you can try other birth control methods it is not only pills....or your hubby can go get a vasectomy..................Madam na wa o......COMMUNICATION IS THE KEY.....

Anonymous said...

Tie your tubes, Put a coil in, let your husband get a vascetomy (although he doesn't sound like the kinda guy that will agree to that)There are other methods love, don't get yourself depressed. Saying you will kill yourself is extreme, many woman will kill to have one child.

eee said...

Aren't there other birth control measures available??

Omo Pastor said...

Pls stop bringing such imbecilic (don't care if such words doesn't exist) topics for us to comment on,u just wasted 2 mins of my life,does this forum look like PPFN clinic?mschewwww,must u stick to what isn't working for u?Obviously u skipped a day or two that's why u got pregnant even when on birth control pill.if am ur hubby I won't even give u notice cos fear of getting pregnant shldnt stop a married woman from having sex with her hubby,there are like 10 birth control methods,one will fit u sha ni.

Julya said...

Dnt worry God is in control. U can try a permanent contraceptive i.e a diaphram,fallopian tube clip or MAYBE u can even remove ur womb. Julya!

Julya said...

Dnt worry God is in control. U can try a permanent contraceptive i.e a diaphram,fallopian tube clip or MAYBE u can even remove ur womb. Julya!

Anonymous said...

he should use a condom!!

Anonymous said...

You should have stated the initial birth control that failed you. I use IUD and it has never failed me. I have 2 kids as planned.

Are you going to stop having sex till you are fifty because you don't want to get pregnant? See a good Doctor for a Safe, fail proof plan jare. You can even have a combination of methods.

Dr. Gaotel said...

Hey! You might want to change you OB/GYN. There are various forms of BC out there to choose from. Additionally, birth control is know to fail when taken wrongly. Ensure the pillls are taken at approximately the same time of the day. Finally, are you taking any antibiotics concomitantly??

Anonymous said...

so simple, remove ur womb, castrate him or to avoid surgery...use condom!!!

weezy said...

talk tins out with your husband and make him understand.that should do the trick.goodluck








Anonymous said...

Were placed on it by a doctor?,av u changed method?I think u should go bck to your doctor,ur solution is with him not here.

Anonymous said...

Be specific. Which Child control method is not working for you? It looks like you have tried only one method

There are several types with varying degrees of failure. See your gynae and and get one close to 100% success rate

Anonymous said...

U sed u tuk pills, there re many other methods u can use. Why nt try others? I've been using the IUD method for 3yrs nw and its perfect for me. Bimbola

Slikkys said...

Try removing ur womb. My neighbour once had ds issue n was advised to either seal her womb or remove it. Never tried it b4 bt u can ask ur gyno for more explanation. Slikky

Anonymous said...

Does your husband know your fears? How has he helped you? How about he takes you to a family planning Clinic and you discuss it with a Doctor together?

Anonymous said...

Be specific. Which Child control method is not working for you? It looks like you have tried only one method

There are several types with varying degrees of failure. See your gynae and and get one close to 100% success rate

Anonymous said...

You should have stated the initial birth control that failed you. I use IUD and it has never failed me. I have 2 kids as planned.

Are you going to stop having sex till you are fifty because you don't want to get pregnant? See a good Doctor for a Safe, fail proof plan jare. You can even have a combination of methods.

Anonymous said...

Pls u a condom..biko...nd dnt fuckin tell me ur hubby doesn't like using a condom..khul

Anonymous said...

Use an INTRA UTERINE CONTRACEPTIVE DEVICE. IUCD for short and stays in for at least 5 years and has no side effects associated with hormonal methods.there is a risk ectopic pregnancy but overall it's safe.have used it for nearly two-years now

Anonymous said...

Omg lady get your tubes tide. I'm quite sure your doctor advised you what to do so. I can't blame your husband, who has time for games. As a woman I knew when I did not want anymore children, what to do. Don't look for sympathy here because you can permanently solve your problem. You are full it! Linda please don't publish anymore bull 2013 it's giving me high bp.

Anonymous said...

Ahhhh...kpele oo..n I m sure ur hubby wnt hear of condoms..life of a woman ..whew...hw abt tieing ur tubes

Unknown said...

Thts so sad!!hv u considered goin for other forms of birth control?we don't pray for bad bt I suggest tieing of ur tubes if u wnt to..depends on d both of u.

Anonymous said...

Let your husband use his condoms.

Anonymous said...

See a doctor,different methods work for different peeps,be sure u're on the perfect one 4 you,if not u and ur husband can talk about it nd use withdrawal method,there's also d morning after pills....there're different ways to go about diz!

lovelylady said...

Birth control pills is only one type of contraception,hv u tried the IUD?intrauterine device?since the hormonals may not be working?there re other hormonal methods like the implant which have a high percentage of success rate.This is a sensitive issuue,u shld discuss witth ur obgyn

Anonymous said...

I don't understand when people rely on completely faceless strangers to give solutions to such serious and personal problems. Madam, this is why u have a doctor! Go to him/her. They are the experts u need! However, I don't think ur problem is so complicated. Be grateful to be so fertile as many would kill to be in ur shoes or even to have just one child. Please love all ur kids equally even if they were not planned. You won't regret it! There are many other methods of birth control such as having ur tubes tied or ur hubby getting a vasectomy. Please speak to an expert about these options and stop killing ur marriage. Denying ur hubby sex is treading on dangerous grounds. GO SEE A DOCTOR! Simple

olubiyi said...

hmmmmm... i happen to know pills sometimes fail. i got married january last year and it was our plan that we wait a year so that i can get a job first after relocating to uk and be entitled to maternity leave bcos of expensive child minding here but i found myself pregnant despite all the pill i took. i dont regret my son, he is the best thing that has ever happened to me however my finance is a mess and im praying for an uplift this year.
back to your issue, not having sex wit your man can drive him out, u have to consult your doctor, there are various plans..e.g the coil iucd or iusd im nt sure wat its called but that is what im getting next week. those ones have a better percentage assurance that you will not get pregnant.
the absolute one, although extreme is to tie your womb. if you are in nigeria though, i dont trust their doctors and like i said its extreme but definately 100 percent sure no pregnancy
above all u need to discuss with your hubby ur fears, talk amicably and arrive at a solution to keep ur home. Gob bless

Jacqueline said...

Your Doctor talked you out of an abortion but didn't talk you into tying your tubes or IUD.

Anonymous said...

Tie your tubes or tell your husband to get a snip

Anonymous said...

castrate ur husband.hes so inconsidrate.try putting it in prayers.

Anonymous said...

Try IUD it works. Best method of family planning

Anonymous said...

My sister, I guess u weren't using them pills d way they shld b used. Anywayz, I advice u go n get ur tubes tied. Its a more permanent solution. God will keep ur kids for u. Just tye n have fun! Don't let ur hubby go o.there r a lot of witchessss out there! Good luck. New year new wahala lol. NEne

James said...

He should use a condom while you use spermicidal creams. It depends on what kind of birth control you're on anyways. Should've specified.

Anonymous said...

Use other forms of birth control

Anonymous said...

do the injection,dapo shot or the other alternatives ma'am pills fail you like GEJ is failing naija

Anonymous said...

birth control is probably "not working" because you are not taking it properly! If you cannot ensure that you are taking it correctly, then perhaps you should consider getting the injection or better yet and IUD. The IUD lasts for 5-10 years with very little side effects for women who have already had children. IT IS A NO BRAINER. GO FIGURE. The pill "didnt work" because you did not take it properly. You are not the one in 100 million woman whose body is different from the rest of us. Stop being silly and get an IUD. So it took 4 kids for you to figure that there must be another way?? SHIKENA.

Anonymous said...

put some little quantity of salt in water....not above d half of stainless cup, n stire very well,, then drink it....this shud be done before 5 minuites after sex with ur husband,,,,it will prevent u from getting pregnant....

Anonymous said...

Talk to your doctor. There are different options available. Good luck

Anonymous said...

put some little quantity of salt in water....not above d half of stainless cup, n stire very well,, then drink it....this shud be done before 5 minuites after sex with ur husband,,,,it will prevent u from getting pregnant....

stay classy said...

Sorry oh,but pls i haven't heard that condoms have been banned or are unhealthy...bikonu use them while you go about looking for a functioning birth control.

Unknown said...

Ouch! What a big dilemma this is! SMH

Obiekwe Valentine said...

talk to a specialist doctor

Anonymous said...

Go for tubal ligation,it,s a simple surgery,u might even leave the same day of surgery.

Anonymous said...

Babe pls visit your gynaecologist and go through the different types of family planning types that we have.Am sure you will get one that suits you and pls talk to God about it.

Anonymous said...

Condoms don finish for where u dey? Use condoms!!!

Anonymous said...

There are condoms, and other post-sexual intercourse drugs to take. Besides, have you talked about this with your husband? Is he aware that birth control pills aren't working for you and is he aware of your fear of getting pregnant again?

Anonymous said...

I think anon 1:10 have said it all,those are d permanent methods dat will work for u

Anonymous said...

see your O&G doctor 1st and they would get you what works for your body!please don't try to tye you womb okay cos you never can tell if you would still want more kids in the future!and your husband is been funny WHY WOULD HE LEAVE you cos of that !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!you lady out there before you say i do TALK ABOUT every damn thing cos its not funny

Anonymous said...

U can insert a coil(copper T) my doctor recomended nd I have had it more than 3years.

Rukky said...

Pray about it and then have a heart-to-heart discussion with your hubby. You don't make such decisions that affect your marriage, INDEPENDENTLY.

Understandably, your fear is not having sex but having children. Who knows, your husband may be more knowledgeable about effective birth control pills than you.

Anonymous said...

Why can't you just talk about it with him? If he is not ccaring about it then that is messed up. That's not what marriage should be like o.

Amebo said...

Madam abeg this is 2013, thought all this otumokpor questions will end with 2012. What you need to do is EDUCATE yourself about sexual health issues. There are various contraceptive methods. 1. Cut your husbands wiliwili off 2. Sterilise yourself as 4 children is more than enough for anyone except your husband is Dangote 3. Hormonal injections/ merina/ cooper coil 4. Condoms etc abeg go do your homework and stop worrying Pple that are enjoying new year celebrations.

Anonymous said...

Go for IUD its gud ad safe

Unknown said...

The Copper-T method is best for you. Easy & clean plust it can be taken out when you want. Google it up and ask your Doctor (which you should probably change).

Anonymous said...

Nawa see life now. I'm begging God 4 kids n hias sm1 dat will kill herself if she gets pregnant again. Waoww

Anonymous said...

How about u try a different BC. Maybe u've been taking "chalk"... if you know what i mean

Unknown said...

The Copper-T method is best for you. Easy & clean plust it can be taken out when you want. Google it up and ask your Doctor (which you should probably change).

Anonymous said...

The Copper T method is best for you. Easily inserted and easily taken out. Google it up and ask your doctor (which you should probably change).

Anonymous said...

You can use the open and close method since ur husband cant afford 2 control his conji...plz dnt deny ur husband sex agan cos he paid 4 it..d open n close method s d best method so far

Anonymous said...

You should get acquainted with natural birth control and possibly suggest to your husband to see a marriage counselor.

Anonymous said...

Nne gbara osiso and go and tie your tubes before u take in again. Obviously the pills r not werking!

Anonymous said...

Sew the punani........I no wan laugh biko! On a more serious level, try IUD it works well or ur hubby shld go for vaseocotomy if he go gree(trust nigerian men).

Anonymous said...

You should get acquainted with natural birth control and possibly suggest to your husband to see a marriage counselor.

Anonymous said...

I wouldn't advice any irreversible method o. Anything can happen

Anonymous said...

There are different types of birth control, with varying degrees of failure rates. She should speak to a doctor, or go to a family planning clinic. She could opt for long-term progesterone injectables..those work quite well..adhering to everyday pills could be herculean.

Anonymous said...

Tie your Tubes! but i dont knw hw that works in nigeria..(if u are there)
secondly, Your Husband must be very mean...is he an animal? That is very wicked of him. Please pray that God changes him if you want to keep ur marriage

Queen Bee said...

He should then learn to use condoms again or have a vasectomy.
Cos even if he doesn't mind having as many kids,carrying pregnancy for 9months isn't easy o!

Miracle said...

Hi dear,let me start by saying pls don't kill ur self. Killing urself will only end up making ur children to bcm housegirls/boys to diff aunties & uncles.
Ok,there r diff types of birth control method. U have to go to another hospital,maybe General hospital arnd ur area or anywhere else. Speak to a woman gnae they will understand u better. Taking pills is no longer adviciable bcs of cancer. So dear there will be something dat will surely work for u. But I want u to know dat children r a reward from God. So many pple r "doing" everyday & time trying to have one. So ccount ur blessings & name themone by one. God bless u dear.

Anonymous said...

the thing is she says birth control pills has she tried other bith controlmethods (i dont think o from wht she said) go to a hspital or family planning center u will get tested by profssionals and they will recommend the family planning method tht suits u most

the story sounds somehow, u are also not evenseriou about it cos if u wereu wud have told us the various birth control methods u hv tried

Anonymous said...

Pls don't deny ur hubby,b4 he starts shagging up outside.tie ur womb,simple

WellUninspired said...

This sort of post just angers me (and I'm a doctor btw). Oh, and I am a woman. In the year 2013 there is no reason why a woman who doesn't want to have kids should have kids due to 'inadequate' birth control. Please for the sake of your sanity and your marriage speak to a gynaecologist eh? or any General Practitioner in a good hospital. There are a hundred and one means of contraception. Good luck

Anonymous said...

There are other methods of birth control. He could simply pull out or he could put on a condom..I mean there are so many other ways. Just look them up and find out which one suits you best.

Anonymous said...

Try MIRENA, copper IUD, it works great. Pills can give u stroke and tubal lIgation is too severe.Pls fix it fast so u and hubby can enjoy without worry.

on point said...

tell ur husband to go for a vasectomy.. Very cheap plus he wnt even need admission in the hosp beyond 2dys.

Andrew said...

Or since he's so inconsiderate, he should get a vasectomy since it's cheaper and easily reversed. Basing his marriage only on sex.... mtschewww

Nne said...

hi dear, no need to feel that way. if the previous contraceptives are the same as the one you are using now, then perhaps try other forms. this website helps to explain them a little better, and i recommend the IUD as its a long term solution that lasts from 5 or 10 years.
https://www.dred.com/uk/types-of-contraceptives.html

Anonymous said...

Hysterectomy is not removal of ovaries, its removal of the uterus(womb). I advise a cheaper option such as an iud. They last 5-7yrs. They are less invasive than surgeries. Also how do you take the birth control pills. Its best to take it every day at the same time. Do not deny your husband sex, you are frrtile about one week in a mth. Give him sex the other 3 wks, learn to communicate with your partner, share ur fears.

Anonymous said...

Depends of the kind of birth control you are using.... the pill and injection might not work but you can use the birth control vagina ring or a diaphragm and there's even the implants and this things aren't very expensive. Go to any good family planning clinic and they will find one that will suit your body apart from the pills.

Anonymous said...

which kyn tubal litigation, babe its ur lyf here oo we dnt pray anitin happens 2ur kids if not u wont be able 2 av kids again. u guys shld use cd den, u could even watch ur menstrual cycle 2 know ur safe periods.

sassygirl said...

I would v opted for Abstinence b4 buh I gat 2 no dt Ʊ r married,go for hysterectonmy or table dis to ur doctor na

Anonymous said...

Have you tried or considered an IUD? Its has a 99% protection rate and you can have it in for 5yrs or 10yrs depending on the type. You dont have to worry abt taking pills everyday or worry abt missing a dose, no monthly shots either and nothing as drastic as a tying your tubes/tubal ligation. I dont know what's available in naija but ur doctor should have discussed/ recommended something else after ur 4th baby. Do your research and talk to your doc.

Blazygurl said...

my dear try natural birth control. You should know your Safe periods

Anonymous said...

Hi.You should go for a bilateral tubal ligation.cheers! see your gynaecologist

Mary said...

1.10 what kind of wrong advice is that ..... Why will a young girl do permanet methods. YOU ARE JUST AN OLODO.

Please dear writer stick with temporary method . It possible you have a FAKE PILL or you are missing days . Have someone buy it abroad or change brands . Alternatively use others such as
Contraceptive implant (thats d one i am using)
Intrauterine system (IUS)
Intrauterine device (IUD)
Injection
Condoms for husband
Diaphragms

Dr. O said...

What kind of birth control do u use? Pills or iucd? U can combine the 2 or better still tie ur tubes. U can do it without ur husbands consent cos its your body and not his. It doesn't cost much either. Go to a good hosp where they have family planning clinics and weigh your options.

@ anonymous 1.10 a hysterectomy is not removal of the ovaries. Its the uterus(womb). Removal of the ovaries is call oopherectomy.

An hysterectomy is rather extreme though :) a simple tubal ligation is good enough

victoria said...

True since ur husband likes sex den c a doc about tubes tying...or get d birth control coil dat u insert every 3/4 months or d injection u take every 3/4 months...

Unknown said...

Tie your womb! since u say u don't want more kids you'll have no regrets doing it.

Anonymous said...

Use an IUD

Anonymous said...

Simple and Easy- VASECTOMY is the answer!!!!! Ask your Doctor about it.

Anonymous said...

Have you tried the upper arm implant IMPLANON? There's no worries about forgetting to take your pills. Do some research on it.

AMY BABY said...

try the intrauterine device known as IUD. its inserted in your womb and can last for as long as five years or even ten years depends on the type you get.

Anonymous said...

you should go for tubal sterilization...period, and have peace

Anonymous said...

Ur body belongs to ur husband,pls don't deny him. Try D MIRENA IUD its very good and doesn't have side effect. I have had it 4 4 years now. It work. Check it up online.

Anonymous said...

Go for tubal ligation (BTL)... Though a permanent contraceptive method, its reversal is not impossible should need be... Expense? Its cheap, say less than 100k esp if done using d less invasive technique(laparoscopically)
Dr. O. O. L.

Anonymous said...

Well you might call me crazy but divorcing your wife over sex??? What happens to you when you have an underlying condition that prohibits you from having sex?...my dear I am a man and I will tell you love on the male side doesn't depend on sex...sex is some thing we men would have any where regardless of if we love the person or not more...my point is if your husband really loves you he will be less concerned about the sex and more concerned as to who the sudden change in you and want to know what's going on by a simple conversation...heck you guys are freaking married if he doesn't gets you after 4 kids then he has problems...I'll end with saying don't be sad just engage him in a convo and air yourself out...there safe methods of having sex eg condom or him working on his self control of ejaculation if y'all still wanna go raw.
Love you and stay happy

Bobo Dave from Miami FL

Anonymous said...

Ur body belongs to ur husband so don't deny him. Try D MIRENA IUD it work. I have had 4 four yrs. It has no side effect. Look it up online.

Anonymous said...

Rubbish talk,deny him sex now,and he will get it outside.u can't ovulate round d month,so talk something else,go and meet a gyno,e will tell u d best method for u.

Anonymous said...

Well there are other methods of contraception aside the pills and there are even new inventions talk to your Doctor at length on that...

Anonymous said...

use condom.plz dnt deprive ur husband sex bcos if u keep doin dat it might warrant him go outside unles u no longer love him as u initially claimed.tnx nd be wise wit ur decision

Anonymous said...

Go get your tube tied or get paraguard IUD or stick to condoms. It works

Anonymous said...

Tie your tubes

Anonymous said...

Ure sooooo ignorant.....

Anonymous said...

lol funny babe. why does it havw to be d man?

Anonymous said...

U have a big problem sir... U are not well @ all... Crazy man

sleekreek said...

Annon Jan 2 12:52pm and 12:53pm......u are the abnormal one here(especially 12:52pm),,,,,u talk like an illiterate and if u tell me u're educated,,,then skool did not pass thru u at all,,,,so because she's not God,,,she should continue to get pregnant and bear kids anyhow??do u know how strong she is financially or is it a wise idea to bear children u cant cater for???ur level of reasoning is extremely low and if u are a married man,,,am too sure u'll be a beast in ur home cos u seem not to be understanding at all......

Back to the topic,,,madam,,its either ur husband sticks to CONDOM or he goes for a vasectomy,,,he is the one who's life depends on sex,,so let him get a vasectomy done.......

shile said...

Woeva u are.. Its not compulsory u read her posts mumu.. Wy don't u jst uproot the negativity in u and see the good side of things.. U can as well learn frm pples experience instead of u goin tru d xperience personally.. So fucken yh!.. These posts are good ....

Anonymous said...

Go ask ur doctor

Anonymous said...

Idiot typing like a certified idiot that you are.... May that your uncircumscised dick stand erect forever....ewu ocha...

Dr. Gaotel said...

Other availabke methods include, but not limited to; IntraUterine Device (IUD), Mirena, MEDROXYPREGESTERONE (Depot Shot), NUVRING (Vaginal ring), Tube Ligation, Vasectony, and least attractive method of using the condom. Good kuck

Anonymous said...

TIE YOUR TUBES ,ur doctor should have told you this after the third child

Anonymous said...

Have u heard of Copper T? very reliable and no side effects

Unknown said...

Pls Try and see a Professional Doctor in that Line of specification and try not to use Medications that don't suit ur body system.
Those prescription people are just mentioning here and there might work for them but not work for U. So apply wisdom....

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